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Mighty Ducks: The Animated Series - The Final Face Off

Reviewed: 06/30/2013

...Sounds So UNEPIC to me!


Yes; I decided to do this one earlier than I had planned. Now you would think that an episode title like "The Final Face Off" would be the final episode of the series; but you would be mistaken. In fact; there are FIVE episodes left after this one! Yeah; they do not know what they are doing. This episode is basically Dragonus tries to kidnap Wildwing to get the hockey mask to locate Atlantis which has a supply of Balerium Crystals. Yeap; selling the game as usual. How does this episode fare? Let's rant on shall we...?!

Sadly; I do not have any writing, story editor, nor animations credits from Juan F. Lara; nor my video has the ED for some reason.


We begin this one at a condemned building somewhere in Anaheim in broad daylight. Did I mention that this is Dragonus' hideout? We head inside as Dragonus is using his computer to show us some lame CGI effects and then a shot of an ancient city which is clearly Atlantis. Siege notices readings for Balerium crystals is off the page. Dragonus calls Chameleon in. Chameleon comes in protesting his bit duties and trips. He falls and gets a bucket on his head. Wraith calls this plan doomed from the start. I give up and watch Teddy Ruxpin again. Okay; that last one I made up. Dragonus demands Chameleon to steal crystals from lost city in one hour and forgets to say "or else." Wow; what a threatening heel. NOT! Chameleon asks if he knows the words please and thank you. Dragonus blows him off and remembers the threat to shred Chameleon's scales. Chameleon backs up and uses his wrist console to disappear from the scene. We actually head to Atlantis which apparently exists in the "real world". Scare quotes intentional. We cut to a wooded area as Chameleon appears and blows off Dragonus. He sees a statue of an Atlantis soldier (remember; this is before Disney did an animated film on Atlantis which is a million times cooler than this show. Ponder that for a minute.) and decides to blend in with the locals. So he changes into a version of the statue and than sucks his thumb to eliminate the brighter green skin he has on now. Why bother? Most authority figures in DTVA would be too stupid to notice. So "Prince V'Lara" walks in unannounced and the guards (who are Sahagins from the Final Fantasy series; only Americanized) notice him in shock. Then we head to the throne room which the artwork looks bland and uninspired as we see an elder like Sahagin with a wooden stick wearing a lot of purple with a black cloak and a tiara. The guard show "Prince V'Lara" and he is in shock; and then recoils and greets him. Hmmm; why so defensive sir? That sounds like someone who got rid of some prince. Prove me wrong writers.

Lord Gargan is voiced by the late Johnathan Harris (passed away in 2012) and according to Wikipedia (DANGER! DANGER!): Harris became a popular character actor for 30 years on television, making his first guest appearance on an episode of The Chevrolet Tele-Theatre in 1949. The part led to other roles in such shows as: The Web, Lights Out, Goodyear Television Playhouse, Sanford and Son, 2 episodes of Hallmark Hall of Fame, Armstrong Circle Theatre, 3 episodes of Studio One, Telephone Time, Schlitz Playhouse of Stars, Climax!, The Outlaws, The Twilight Zone, Bonanza, The Rogues, The Adventures of Ozzie & Harriet, among many others. Harris returned to television, where he landed a co-starring role opposite Michael Rennie in The Third Man, from 1959-65. He played Bradford Webster, an eccentric, cowardly assistant. Half the episodes were shot in London, England; the rest were filmed in Hollywood. Harris' teenaged son would visit the set at this time, and Harris did whatever he could to bridge the gap between father and son and tried to make up for lost time. From 1963-65, Harris co-starred in the sitcom The Bill Dana Show. He played Mr. Phillips, the pompous manager of a posh hotel who is constantly at odds with his bumbling Bolivian bellhop, "José Jiménez" (Bill Dana). This formula presaged the popular John Cleese hotel comedy, Fawlty Towers. Don Adams rounded out the cast as an inept house detective—his character, dialog, and other comedy bits would soon carry over into his "Maxwell Smart" role on Get Smart. In similar fashion, several of Harris' one-liners from the show (such as "Oh, the pain!"), along with many character mannerisms, became part of the Dr. Zachary Smith character on Lost in Space. In an apparent homage to his earlier role, Harris played a similarly pompous diplomat on Get Smart in 1970. His female assistant is named "Zachary". He also guest-starred on The Ghost & Mrs. Muir. His last series guest-starring role was on an episode of Fantasy Island.

Harris spent most of the remainder of his career as a voice actor, heard in television commercials as well as cartoons such as Channel Umptee-3, The Banana Splits, My Favorite Martians, Rainbow Brite, Darkwing Duck, Happily Ever After, Problem Child, Visionaries: Knights of the Magical Light (giving a master class in sycophancy as lackey to the main villain), Freakazoid! (reprising the Smith character and dialogue under the name "Professor Jones,") A Bug's Life, Buzz Lightyear of Star Command and Toy Story 2. He also had several cameo and guest appearances, including Zorro, Bewitched, Fantasy Island, Sanford and Son, "Ark II" and Uncle Croc's Block. Harris also provided the voiceover of the Cylon character "Lucifer" on the original Battlestar Galactica series. He also did voice-over work in an episode of the animated Superman series. Harris taught drama and gave voice lessons to Chuck Norris and was credited for this by Norris in Good Guys Wear Black.[3] He starred in the Saturday morning children's series Space Academy and Uncle Croc's Block in the mid-seventies, and was a well-known TV spokesman for the International House of Pancakes. In 2009 his final performance was finally released. He had done a recording session in 2001 for a short animated film titled The Bolt Who Screwed Christmas in which he plays the Narrator and "The Bolt". He died about a year after his recording session, long before the independent film was completed. The film also features voiceover work by Bill Mumy, Angela Cartwright and Marta Kristen, their parts added to the film after his death as a small tribute with the film dedicated in his memory. He began his career in 1949 with the Chevrolet Tele-Theatre (His Name Is Jason) and The Web in 1950. Darkwing Duck as Phineas Sharp is his DTVA debut; followed by Professor Villanova in Quack Pack and Buzz Lightyear of Star Command as Era. The Bolt Who Screwed Christmas is his most recent credit. He has 83 acting credits and eight self credits to his resume.

So Gargan orders the guards to leave him so he can commute with the "prince" in private and they leave. Gargan gets into "V'lara"'s face and demands to know what is going on. "V'lara" insists that he is the prince and talks like a bad mobster. Oh lord. Gargan decides to let him rule the throne as long as he plays figurehead and leaves the state affairs to Gargan. "V'Lara" flops on the throne and decides to chill out; accepting the deal. Pfft; whatever. So we head to the Arrowhead Pond as the Mighty Ducks are playing the Dallas Armadillos in the Western Conference Final. You know; if the NHL wanted to sell it's hockey product to Americans; maybe they should have granted licensing rights to all the hockey teams the NHL has to this show beforehand. I mean; this implies that Dallas has two NHL teams (since the real name is the Dallas Star; TAFKA Minnesota North Stars). Roy Firestore claims that the Mighty Ducks are up 3 games to 2 in the series; but down 3 to 2 in the game with 12:09 to go on the clock above us; but the announcer implies it's only 12.09 seconds to go. WHAT?! Now if they really wanted to play suspense games; have both teams tied 3-3 in the series and have the ducks down 3-2 with 12.09 seconds left. The Armadillos are clad in black with red trim as there is body checking and passing, but not much else. So Duke steals the puck and passes to Nosedive who shoots the puck on net with three seconds to go and it's so slow that it somehow gets into the net; but the goal is disallowed because time ran out before it crossed the line. Roy proclaims that this has to hurt and the series is tied at 3. Nosedive is pissed off at this. I am too; because in the real world, that slapshot goes in about a second BEFORE the time runs out. Those pucks are rigged; RIGGED I SAY! Nosedive skates off to the dressing room in disgust as the crowd groans. So we head to the locker room as the ducks are undressing and Nosedive is still pissed off. Wildwing proclaims that Nosedive played the best game of his life; which is probably true at this point. Nosedive blows it off for not being enough; as Grin does his Master Splinter impression and tells Nosedive to stop complaining already. Okay.

Duke tells Nosedive to save his frustrations for Game 7; but Mallory wants him to save it for Dragonus which is kind of nasty when you consider that Dragonus has failed in his mission everytime so far. The ducks all agree on this because they have been here a year so far (despite the series running about three months natch) and they haven't completed their mission which is to destroy Dragonus and find the dimensional gate to return to Puck World; leaving Phil Palmfeather high and icy. Okay; they didn't say that last part; but it was implied. Yawn. So we scene change to Chameleon V'Lara relaxing on the throne as he is treated like a king. V'Lara enjoys himself for a while and then gets some beeping; which causes him to jump out of the throne and bail to behind the room. He changes his arm to operate the wrist console and it shows a screen with Dragonus blowing him off and threatening to send Siege to rip him apart. Chameleon ponders this over and decides that he has had enough of the bullying and wants to be just a cowardly prince instead of the cowardly heel and quits on Dragonus. He also tells Dragonus to go suck on a lemon which was the exact response by Ralph in TMNT 1987 on Shredder's offer to join him. So we cut back to inside the Raptorous with a shot of Atlantis on the screen and it fizzles out and we go to blank screen. Dragonus is pissed off as Siege wants to teleport there and kill Chameleon; but Dragonus no sells because they lose contact with the island and the island is moving. How? Wraith does nothing but complain about how stupid this plan is. Again; what incentive is there for me to watch this program? Dragonus ponders this over and states that if only he had Wildwing's mask. Wait; so he now knows about the mask's abilities? Oh never mind; let's scene change to to the secret headquarters underneath the Arrowhead Pond as Tanya is at the super computer and claims that it's too quiet around these parts. Geez; this doesn't bode well for ice hockey's future in the USA. Wildwing has the mask on as if someone sneezes he wants to know about it. Then the super computer goes haywire as the computer pinpoints the location to somewhere in the mountains according to Tanya. All the babyfaces leave on cue. Yawn.

So we go into the Aerowing launch sequence of doom (with upside down screens and CGI) and Wildwing is no longer wearing the mask for no good reason. CGI puck scene changer of doom and we head to a mountain side so desolate; you would think they were in Arizona or something. There are only about seven evergreen trees in the area as the Aerowing flies and lands in front of a mountainside base (which is probably used for weather records). So we head inside as two security guards are tied up and gagged in the corner. One if them is a red haired female by the way. Siege is playing with the computer as the babyface blow up the door and the guards disappear without a trace despite being tied up in a corner in the first shot. Yeap; this is one of those episodes. So Siege turns around and uses his Takkium Gun of doom; but that is countered easily and the blaster is shot out of his hands (with a puck as a bullet natch) and he gets tied up by a grappling hook. Wildwing goes over to Siege's wrist console and wants to pay Dragonus visit. Siege proclaims that he wouldn't dare and the delivery is so slipshod that he has to be doing this on purpose. Nosedive wants the great big hug and they embrace Siege as Wildwing works the console and they disappear in a lime green shadow and reappear inside the Raptorous. Nosedive loves this e-ticket...for about three seconds as they are surrounded by Dragonus's guards. Yeah; the Titanic indeed. That ends the segment eight minutes in. Yeah; we are one third into this episode and nothing of note has happened yet...

After the commercial break; we head to somewhere inside the Raptorus as the ducks are tied up with crimson red electric ropes surrounded by cell like ropes. Ooookkkkkaaaaayyyyyy. The guard stand watch just to overkill the scene as Dragonus enters. Nosedive mocks Dragonus' finger nails; but Dragonus ignores it because his victory is going to be so sweet now. Big logic break: Wildwing is wearing the mask now. DUMB! Because Dragonus grabs the mask from Wildwing's face without any suspense nor fanfare. Wildwing is as pissed as I am; albeit for different reasons. Dragonus tries the mask on; but it shocks his head and Dragonus is forced to put the mask back on Wildwing. See; the mask only works on ducks and Drake DuCain is not an idiot; unlike another certain duck I know. WINK! WINK! NUDGE! NUDGE! BLAM! HEE HEE! MISSED AGAIN DRAKE! YOU ARE NOT...POW! OUCH! Ummmm... So Dragonus drags Wildwing (I guess the crimson ropes have no effect on Dragonus. Oh; the irony!) away throwing him to Siege as he demands Wildwing that he help Siege go to Atlantis to find the Balerium crystals; our he will open a trap door; raise the babyfaces over the air and dunk them into the lava. Geez; the same death trap again Dragonus? Even Mr. Fat had some variation in his death traps. So Wildwing is let go from the crimson ropes and Siege teleports himself and Wildwing out. So we head to a run down office in Anaheim as Captain Klegghorn (yes; he's back, for no reason) as he is getting a call from Phil Palmfeather from headquarters. I'm guessing this is the "padding" for this episode. Phil is whining because the ducks wouldn't abandon him for the biggest game of their lives. You know; if they really wanted to build it up properly; it would be a Stanley Cup final; instead of the Western Conference Final. IDIOTS!! Klegghorn decides to be right over; probably to mock Phil again for making up wild stories about mutant ducks again.

So we head in the Aerowing over the ocean as Wildwing is driving, wearing the mask and forced to endure having a laser gun pointed at him. So we get the red X-Ray effects from the FPS shot and there is the city of Atlantis dead ahead (first death reference of the episode). Yawn. So we head back to a look off as Gargan introduces V'Lara to the masses as the entire Atlantis population (which is about 30 subjects max) pop for the prince. Unlike the Adventures of Teddy Ruxpin where I was skimming over the last episode; when I was doing it; it was because all the footage happened in other episodes and I didn't rant on them beforehand. I don't have that here. I'm skimming over because there is nothing worth noting here; other than one child Sahagin. Chameleon greets the crowd and they love him as we pan east and see Wildwing and Siege climbing up to a golden ledge. Wildwing uses the X-Ray hockey mask again and sees V'Lara who is clearly Chameleon doing an impression. So Wildwing and Siege run in and Siege manages to plow through the Sahagin guards of doom with ease. However; Siege tries to tackle Chameleon down; but Gargan gets in front of Chameleon and zaps both Siege and Wildwing which ties them up with lime green energy ropes. Maybe the ducks should have waited until the playoffs were over after that; because this is simply not Wildwing's day to be free. The "Wild Wing" has been tamed again. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So Chameleon blows off Siege because he likes this crowd because they respect him and his deception. He waves to the crowd for fun as we head back to the other babyfaces hanging over the lava pit as Wraith is walking away towards the door and wants the Balerium crystals to be connected to the sub generator as he and the guards walk out of the room. Tanya wonders why Wraith wants to do that and Nosedive's reaction is hilarious. HAHA! Mallory gives Nosedive eye contact and Nosedive wants her to sue him. Basically Nosedive said that they like doing evil stuff; which is actually really accurate in American cartoons anyway.

So we head back to Atlantis (which looks way too modern to be taken seriously as an ancient city) and head to the prison cells (with energy bars for the prison cell doors; but the windows are iron bars. That's REALLY STUPID) as Siege and Wildwing mope around. The Sahagin guard with a spear leaves for no good reason as Siege thinks he can break down the door and blitzes; but bounces off the energy bars and drops on his ass. Wow; BS&P really hates shock spots now. Wildwing then notices Prince V'Lara in an opposite prison cell. Huh? The dude comes over and we discover that the real prince is not dead; but imprisoned in the dungeon when Lord Gargan took over Atlantis and his staff which V'Lara is helpless without. Ummm; yeah. Wildwing wonders why the guard left as much as I do as the guard returns. Wildwing then uses the mask to look into the pouch and accuses the guard of raiding the treasure vault. His evidence: the pouch is empty. Despite the fact that we never see Wildwing look into the pouch beforehand. This only serves to piss the guard off; which is probably Wildwing's intentions to begin with. The guard grabs the coins and demands to know how he did that. Wildwing takes his mask off and offers to let him wear it. So the guard takes the mask and tries to wear it; but he get zapped and knocked out as he slumps down in front of the prison door. Siege demands Wildwing to grab the key and Wildwing grabs the key from around the guard's neck and it has a crystal point on it; like it was an arrow. Wildwing opens the prison cell door and Wildwing order Siege to fight the guards. Now Siege would have no problem with that; but he runs in the opposite direction and turns on Wildwing anyway. I think because Wildwing blew him off as a sleazebag. I don't get this since Siege gains nothing by turning on Wildwing; unless he's doing it to allow Dragonus to kill the other babyfaces and giving the monster heel an excuse for doing so. So Wildwing unlocks the prince's cell and wants the prince to get the staff; but the prince blows it off because it's hopeless.

Now you would think that since Wildwing is the babyface and on the side of right that he would encourage the prince to overcome his fear and help him get the staff back. But no; Wildwing yells at the prince to get it NOW and the prince runs away. WHAT?! The mask makes it even more heelish. I just pinpointed the moment where execs thought that making the defacto babyfaces into heels like a cartoon version of 1984 was a swell idea. Screw this crap! Wildwing knocks out some guards and then follows Siege up the stairs; but get blocked from both sides by six guards out of nowhere. Whatever guys. So then we see Siege walking to a computer room and there is a motherlode of Balerium Crystals sitting in a bowl about 100 feet away from the computer console. Siege grabs a bag and walks towards the crystals. We return to underneath the Arrowhead Pond as Palm is playing with the super computer. Huh? And Klegghorn is with him. WHAT THE HELL?! I thought we already stated that Klegghorn doesn't buy this crap? The computer pinpoints the location as Doyle Heights and Klegghorn proclaims that it's the worst place because there is not one decent doughnut shop. Can we please STOP doing police stereotypes already? I know authority figures in DTVA are dumb as a box of hammers many times; but do they have to be dumb and fat too? So we head to the throne room as Chameleon V'Lara is enjoying herself with his grape eating. Gargan comes in with royal scrolls proclaiming that he has having a feast and a revilry in his honor; but he has to sign the scrolls first in order to finish the work Gargan wants which is a lot of tax raising. We pan away to two guards as Siege arrives from behind and bashes the guard's heads in, knocking them out. Siege then storms the throne and grabs Chameleon proclaiming that Dragonus is going to kill him for Chameleon being a traitor. Chameleon yells for the guards and there is no dice; until two guard arrive with Wildwing. And they do nothing to Siege despite the fact that they had put Siege in prison earlier. UGH! UGH! UGH! Siege then gets in Chameleon's face and declares one last order. So we head outside AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) outside the temple as Wildwing is strapped against the wall with green shackles. Yes folks; Gargan is still on Siege's side despite the fact that he was the one who tied Siege up earlier.

To further piss me off; Wildwing breaks the fourth wall by stating that getting tied up three times in one EPISODE has got to be a record. UGH! That what the FANS would be saying! If there were any fans of this show. You are supposed to say "three times in one day" or even "three times in less than 24 hours"; or even "three times in a half of a Quack Cycle" or something along those lines. Chameleon is trying hard to salvage any entertainment value in this episode and he's failing badly. So the guards push in the Barelium Crystals into some out of nowhere console and a door opens and out comes lava pouring down the chute towards Wildwing. Yeah; almost the exact same death trap as the other babyfaces; only it's horizontal instead of vertical. Just who is booking this crap?! Wildwing calls this done in by a lava lamp. UGH! It's a magma river you idiot! Just who is booking this crap?! Seriously; I don't know who is writing this. This ends the segment almost 15 minutes in. I'm sick of this episode already! Why, oh why didn't I just do prep work for the Fall Assortment?

After the commercial break; we continue with the lava pouring down the chute and out comes the real prince as Gargan notices him right away and orders the guards to arrest him. Jeff Bennett's voice is just pissing me off now. It sounds like a really poor timed Charles Adler voice. The prince admits that he couldn't find the staff; but Wildwing uses his mask which the heels failed to take off of him despite the fact that albeit useless to them; it's a weapon in WILDWING'S face. IDIOTS!! Gargan has the staff, DUH! Like that was shocking to begin with as Wildwing orders the prince to get the staff and free him; but the prince is a coward. What a shock? So Wildwing yells at him to do it at any price. Man; Wildwing is so bossy that it makes Rebecca look like a nice lady. Oh wait; she is and no one other than me sees it that way. Some of the guards enter behind the prince; forcing the prince to jump and he knocks out two guard unintentionally (because he tells them to excuse him) and gets to the ground. He goes over to the machine and I think he knocks out the two guards at the console and then pushes something which releases the shackles from Wildwing and Wildwing bails from the lava. I don't really care what exactly happened here because nothing offended me and there was nothing of note to say here. Wildwing jumps down as Gargan uses the staff; but Wildwing uses the Ice Shield (HELLO! Why didn't you use that to block the attack from the start? IDIOTS!!) to deflect it and it ties up Siege. At least in theory. It does knock him down for certain as Wildwing stalks Gargan and grabs the staff and breaks it revealing the bronze staff (pointless since everyone in Atlantis is dumber than Goofy at this point). He throws it at the prince and the prince grabs it and transforms into Prince V'Lara. So he aims the staff at Gargan and zaps him into a black puppy with a white mustache. Well; there is your ten bucks right there folks.

So Chameleon finally returns to normal and grabs the bag of crystal before Siege can teleport away; as Chameleon mimics Snagglepuss's promo. You know that Snagglepuss sucks as a character when even Time Warner thinks it's a waste of money to sue Disney out of existence. So we return to the Raptorous as Chameleon runs into the cockpit with the bag of crystals as he proclaims that Siege was useless and he did it all by himself. HAHA! Siege blows him off for being a liar; so Dragonus tells them to shut the hell up. Dragonus orders Chameleon to put the crystals into the generator and start the engines. Both goons bail as Siege blows off Chameleon and threatens to tie his tail up good. Pfft; whatever. Dragonus then goes over to the computer and the screen reveals a Dragonus who looks like a Satanic version of the samurai male from Soul Calibur 2 (Mitsurugi I do believe) only wearing a black cloak. Dragonus addresses him as General Filersaur. Wait...WHAT THE HELL? Apparently; Dragonus had his own army, which begs the question: Why didn't he just call them from the very start? This question cannot be answered, do not think too much. So we get a scene changer as Wildwing thanks the prince and the prince acts like Elvis for no reason at all; doing Wildwing's promo. Wildwing proclaims that he will stop them and gets into the Aerowing and flies away. Ummm; yeah, whatever. So we head to the time wasting filler crap segment as we see Klegghorn's car stop in front of the abandoned dance hall and both human babyfaces (although calling them that in the loosest sense of the word) get out. Klegghorn wants to know why the location is a dance studio and Phil thinks that they are practicing some dated dancing routine that no one gives a crap about. Anyhow; the studio changes into the Raptorous on cue and the door is exposed. So Klegghorn brings out a bullet shooting pistol and shots the lock and gains entrance into the Raptorous. You know BS&P; if you wanted to get rid of the bullet stuff; you should have changed the sound effect to a Transformer laser sound instead of just having the light blue flash. IDIOTS!

And remember what I said about the brooms being conveniently placed for Gimmick and Grubby to grab in Father's Day. Well; how about a wall with laser guns strapped to it. Klegghorn grabs two and gives one to Phil; which is not a good idea. I don't think Phil has the small motor skills to handle a fake gun; let alone a real one. So we cut to the cockpit with Dragonus on screen with Siege and Chameleon as the crystals are in place and it's time to vamoose. Notice Wraith has been nowhere to be seen since he blew off Dragonus when Chameleon turned on them about five minutes into the episode (now we are almost eighteen minutes into this)? Yeah; he is moping somewhere now as we start the engine and the ship takes off. Phil wishes he was in a contract dispute right now. I wish everyone doing this show was in a contract dispute with Disney, because this episode really sucks now. So we head back to the tied up babyfaces over a lava pit. How sad that they are still better on the "avoid getting kidnapped scale" than their lead babyface? I mean; even Nosedive has a better record of this than Wildwing! And in comes Siege, Chameleon and Wraith (where was he? Having a smoke break or something?) run in as Siege is giddy and Wraith wants para boiled ducks. Yeah; no one should be shocked that they would want to kill the lead babyfaces since they never promised to spare them from the very start. The babyfaces do their "we die; the revolution begins" promo which the heels blow off because according to Siege; the humans don't care about them. And then here comes the fire fight from Klegghorn and Phil. Seriously; when the shots hit something it bursts into flames. So the heels bail behind the console on the right; the humans on the left and we fire flamethrower like laser fire. This is the best part of the episode right there. When Phil F'N Palmfeather and Captain Fatass Klegghorn provide the most entertainment for me; this episode really blows.

So the ducks all yell at Phil to pull the lever and Phil notices the lever on the wall. To Maffew: I have found your next lever spot for CZW; if you are interested. So Phil pulls the lever (JESUS~!) and that closes the pit and releases the rope causing the ducks to fall and land on their feet. The ducks go for their puck guns even though Klegghorn is doing a kick ass job holding his own against the heel. Yeah; now it basically five against three; discounting Phil for obvious reasons. Remember that these are the babyfaces. So Chameleon wants some tactics and it involves bailing out of the room. Whatever guys. So they run out of the room as all the babyfaces run after them into the hallway; and then the heels stop right in front of another lever (another decent Botchamania reference in the making and this one is actually better) and they surrender slightly slower than France. Wow; that is just sad. So they stalk the heels and Chameleon pulls the lever (JESUS~! Hey; there is much less of a chance of me getting sued from Maffew and the wrestler who does that JESUS~ promo; than saying WRONG LEVER and getting sued by Disney, so...) and the babyfaces all get WARNERED~! Sigh; WB stopped mocking you a long time ago because now it is sad. Siege, Wraith and Chameleon proclaim that nothing can stop them now since they all free fell to their deaths; but then the Aerowing flies up and yes; the babyfaces are safe and shooting their pieces. Whatever guys. The babyfaces all bail into the Aerowing as Dragonous turns on the dimensional gate and it create a dimensional gate that is supposed to be supercharged; but looks normal (making everyone look stupid in the process) as we see Dragonus' army as Dragonus is cheering victory and declaring war on the Earth. Don't care. The babyfaces see this as their ticket home; but Wildwing wants to destroy it. And it you listen closely; you can hear Phil laughing all the way to the bank since Wildwing is on his side now. The other ducks don't like it because the dimensional gate is their ticket back to Puck World. Wildwing doesn't care because he promised the prince to destroy the gate no matter what it takes. So he flies to the front and shoots the laser at the dimensional gate laser gun and it gets destroyed which causes a backlash that destroys the main engines and all the Balerium crystals in the process. WHAT THE HELL? I think even Dragonus is wondering this logic break as much as I am.

So the Raptorous dives into the sea and they all died. Yeah right?! If only so the show would end. So we scene change to a cliff where all the babyface look at the ocean and Phil asks if they are coming back and then Nosedive breaks the fourth wall about being renewed for another season. Not as offensive as Wildwing's but still annoying as Phil motions to the babyfaces to leave now because there is still Game 7 left to play. Just for reference; in the 1996/1997 season; the real Anaheim Mighty Ducks finished with a 36-33-13 record and made it to the Western Conference Semi-Final. That is more accurate to this cartoon than I expected as I thought Anaheim failed to make the playoffs that season. Anyhow; we head underwater as there is a gaping hole in the Raptorous which should have drown everyone inside; but not only do they not drown, but there is absolutely NO water in the ship. UGH! UGH! UGGGGGHHHHHHH! Dragonus is as angry as I am because he is killing his robot guards with his red laser cannon arm. He curses the ducks about three times and then Chameleon is stupid enough to ask for a raise and we scene change before anything can happen to him. Dammit! This is truly the "NO HIT LEAGUE"! AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So we head to the Arrowhead Pond for Game 7; with the score tied at 6 and in the dying seconds, and anyone who has a brain and knows how to use will know that the ducks get the puck and scores in the net to win the series and move onto the Stanley Cup. Am I right? Huh? HUH?! And would it be a shock if Nosedive scored the winning goal and did the same promo that they have been driving into the ground for the entire episode? Wildwing really had an OFF night tonight didn't he? And they used stock footage of the flaming net and lights after the goal because Disney is cheaper than usual at this point. The ducks all celebrate in Dallas's zone as they embrace each other as they are heading to the Stanley Cup which I bet we NEVER get to hear the result of. The crowd pops in the stands as we get the far shot of the arena and that ends the episode at 21:01 aired. This episode was embarrassing to watch since nothing make sense and the story appeared to be connected with chewing gum. It's one thing to be tedious; but it's worse when you are tedious and crappy at the same time. Klegghorn's fire fight with the heels and Nosedive's promo were the only bright spots in this one. DUD (0%).


THE REVIEW LINE

Wow; I was imagining what Mighty Duck would look like when they dogged it and this episode was a perfect demonstration of that fact. It's bad enough that this is a TMNT clone with ducks and hockey; but add on logic breaks out of the wazoo and nothing of note happening that was memorable or good; and you have a recipe for disaster. Sure Quack Pack had negative star episodes; but at least those episodes were memorable even though it was for the wrong reasons. I didn't care about anyone in this one and everything about it was bland and uninspiring. Atlantis was bland, the prince was bland with no personality that makes him endearing or memorable. Chameleon's tweener turn meant nothing since he reverted back to heel despite the fact that he had no reason to. Gargan suddenly was on Siege's side after tying up Siege earlier. Wildwing claiming the pouch was empty even though there was no evidence that he saw the pouch before the guard left. Stuff like this that kills continuity. Klegghorn was the best part of the episode (along with Phil) and they are added as filler and background noise; getting one spot. Sure; I didn't care; but at least seeing the human shoot ass on the aliens is amusing enough. Nosedive was all right; but Wildwing looked absolutely sad since he went into heel mode too many times and it made him look stupid. At least the animation was on it's best behavior; so it's isn't a total write off. Overall; this episode sucked and I fear that this is only the tip of the iceberg after a decent start to the series. I'll be considering this show in 2014; but I make no promises. So next weekend is the start of Gargoyles which should be epic...unlike this show in general. So....

Thumbs down for this episode and I'll see you all next time.

 

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