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Mighty Ducks: The Animated Series - Monster Rally
Reviewed: 08/23/2014
Are The Pokemans Rebelling Against Their Trainers?
Well; let's move on with more Mighty Ducks fun! YAY! So next up is the ducks facing a fat hippie and his cool cats as we do monster truck demolition derbies. Now this sounds like a fun idea on paper. Is it good in practice? HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~! Let's rant on shall we...?!
This episode was written by the duo of Garfield & Judith Reeve-Stevens. The story is edited by David Wise. Woo-woo! The animation was done by Walt Disney Animation Japan I do believe.
We begin this one in the streets of Anaheim AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) with a shot of a car that looks like a car monster with teeth on it! That is seriously not up to code! So we have a closeup of the car which looks like a monster car literally. We head inside to the driver seat with cuts of a brown skinned alien with a remote control controlling something. Jump cut to a shot of a billboard with a monster truck as a wheel approaches; and then jump cut back to the alien who literally looks like a fat black man. Really guys? You didn't honestly think that this wasn't going to cause trouble in legal? I guess no one was watching this show unless there is a "right to be forgotten" law hidden from us in the USA or something. Then we discover that the alien has a purple colored alien in chaffeur gear (both are wearing shades) as the brown alien addresses the chaffeur as Digger. Digger sounds like Chameleon rapping (Frank Welker); but there is no Chameleon in this episode. The brown skinned alien sounds like Jim Cummings and he's known as Daddy-O Cool. Yeah; that'll draw money. NOT! More jump cuts to the remote and then more jump cuts to showing that the car has already transformed into a deranged Bumblebee from Transformers G1 with the spotlights on. You know no one cares about this show when we are seeing jump cuts in the dozens in the first segment of the episode. So the Bumblebee Constructcon Monster Truck of Doom uses the claw arm to destroy the toll booth and then drives over the monster truck billboard, all while we see cuts to Daddy-O playing with the remote control. Then a FPS shot from the car with more rapping; and then a shot into the sky with the Aerowing showing up. Then a sky shot of the truck trying to destroy the building; but getting cut off by the white laser fire. So we see Nosedive and Wildwing exchange notes as Drake One was right about this being a break in and a monster truck rally. More shooting and this prompts Daddy to call them squares. They are more like rectangles; but that isn't catchy. So there is an ass laser in the back of the truck and it fires and hits the Aerowing, setting it on fire while taking a nosedive. Ooo.
Then we get a classic Mighty Ducks moment: Daddy-O and Digger are so happy because they are gone. So the Aerowing simply lands on the pavement without further incident. There is a fire inside the Aerowing onto the controls as Tanya and Mallory are not liking this at all. So; do they bother to put out the fire? No! Nosedive cuts a Michaelangelo promo and Wildwing orders the Migrator to come out. And then the back opens and the Migrator comes out. By the way; this all happened slowly, clearly to pad the running time. Daddy and Digger are shocked and appalled; and so am I, for an entirely different reason. So it's the Migrator against Derange Bumblebee which will literally add zero buys to this show. So the DBB fires his flamethrower laser and the Migrator just sits there and destroys the front of the Migrator. Tanya is panicky like crazy because Duke will not fall back. Tanya is scared even more of this monster truck than she was with the dinosaur. Duke refuses to fall back because he thinks he's standing up to a bully since he cuts a promo about staring the beast down and then delivering the knockout punch. Duke; you are no Austin Aries. Start skipping you fool! So the DBB drives forward as Tanya yells at Duke to kill the thing already; and Duke shoots the puck cannon and the DBB goes into smoke and reappears as it apparently flew into the air and bounces onto the pavement dead, just like that. Digger is not happy at all; and who can blame him? Daddy sucks! Daddy tells him that he wants the Migrator's engine because it is a gasser. Damn; this is really, really bad black jive talk. So the windows are rolled up and the monster car turns around and leaves with more crappy talking; and then the CGI scene changer of doom beckons. We return to the Arrowhead Pond and inside headquarters as the babyfaces are inspecting the blown up rig and for once, no one instantly blamed Dragonus for this. In fact; Tanya is certain that it wasn't done by Dragonous either! Duke is so happy to enjoy the demolition derby; but Tanya blows it off as we see Grin, Mallory and Nosedive lowering the Migrator into position for repairs. Yeah; Tanya's toys got damaged.
So then Phil comes in with a poster and his cellphone as he starts his sweet talk promo; causing Wildwing to do the Gruffi pose and yell no. Phil goes into hard sell mode and Wildwing tells him to read his beak. I read the beak; it sezs: "You suck!". Then Wildwing walks off and Phil mentions Daddy-O is having a chairty event with a car show in Greased Palms. Why on earth would you need a fictious city? Why not Palm Springs? This is supposed to be the real world. All you have done is exposed the fact that this is a trap. Apparently; they want to see the Migrator as Tanya blows off Duke for screwing that up. Nosedive is not happy; but then asks Tanya about the new rig she is creating. Wait; what? Tanya then explains that it's called the Mega Migrator X2. WHAT? I'm guessing that it's a play on Mega Man X2 which is a SNES game that came out about 18 months before this show existed. So we get another classic moment: They do a puck scene changer of doom just to fade to black and then do the slow reveal of the Mega Migrator X2. Why? Buzzing lights on the ceiling ensue which is probably the only notable effect in this scene as Phil is so happy...even though the Mega Migrator X2 looks exactly like the original Migrator. Sequel indeed! Phil sweet talks Tanya for a while as Tanya admits that it hasn't been road tested yet and going to the desert would be grand. Duke is so happy to see it that he wants to wear his desert threads; so Tanya simply grabs him and throws him out of the garage because Duke broke the Migrator due to his stupidity earlier. Wow; for once, the old farts look good in this show. Duke complains and sulks as Wildwing tells Tanya to keep Duke here since they need to make sure there is no funny business with Dragonous. Don't worry Wildwing, Dragonous is not funny anyway. So Wildwing agrees to do Phil a favor prompting Phil to cheer with glee and get on his cellphone to inform Daddy-O that the deal is done and he'll be seeing them soon. So we go to Daddy-O with Digger; and a white skinned alien who looks exactly like Daddy-O only in different duds, more hunchbacked and with tiny bongos.
Daddy-O tells them to be there or be square and the henchmen play the bongos, and no one cared. So we go to the desert with a sky shot of the Mega Migrator on pavement. Then we get smoke coming out from the back and Mallory claims that it's running like a dream. Really? Anyhow; we have Wildwing (with the golden mask on) driving as we exchange notes on the rig; then a sky shot of some dam (the kind I see in Nova Scotia somewhere on highway 101); and then a shot of a sign that reads "Welcome To Greased Palms Speedway"; which means that this is the racetrack and not the city. Okay; I got it wrong after all. Turn left to certain main event doom, you roasted ducks! There is a goofy abandoned gas station on the side as we cut to inside with Nosedive pleading for Wildwing to give him the wheel and Wildwing takes off his seatbelt and gives him the right to do it. Wildwing's acting on the "watch your speeeeeeedddd" when Nosedive floors it is so hilarious, Wildwing almost sounds like Tanya. Almost. Cut to a sign from a cliff that reads "Greased Palms Speedway" in white letters with a blue background and rope flags. We pan down to an arrow sign and the entrance to a cave. Memo to babyfaces: When you have to enter a cave to get to the speedway; that means trouble. So the Mega Migrator enters the cave as tumbleweed flies into the foreground from right to left. Why? I don't know. I don't care. So we head inside the cave which is well lit. So then Nosedive is forced to stop because it's a dead end; prompting Mallory to blow him off for making a wrong turn. Nosedive points out that he was following the signs. Then we get rumbling and the strip of road the Mega Migrator was on and it slips onto a track of grease; causing the brakes to fail. So the MMX2 drives into the underground passage and this leads to the sky shot of what looks like a monster truck arena. So the MMX2 enters the stadium and slides to the side to stop from tipping over somehow. So the babyfaces look around inside the MMX2 and they notice a pile of wrecked cars and a pool of crude oil which Nosedive has to make a Beverly Hillbillies promo out of. Yeah.
So we do a zoom in shot of the control center under glass with Daddy-O Cool, Digger and Daddy-O Clone (his beard is more of a smiley face than a frown) watch on as Digger is calling them a bunch of squares for being in a different set of wheels. Well of course they did Digger. The original Migrator was destroyed by you and Duke's "up yours" attitude towards Tanya. Everything I hear Daddy-O say "rightous"; I swear he sounds like a crappy black preacher. So we cut to a wall of the arena with green double doors sliding open to reveal a red version of the exact same DBB vehicle we saw at the beginning of the episode. Then a other set of doors and a blue version of the same vehicle comes out. Then the double doors where the Mighty Ducks entered the arena get closed off. Why? The grease would have prevented them from getting out; so what was the point of that? The babyfaces panic as the demolition derby has begun as a laser cannon shoots at the MMX2 and apparently makes it burst into flames with a lot of smoke. This show is truly bad for your health, movie rating and any hope of seeing anthros in a DTVA world ever again...until Teacher's Pet of course. This ends the segment nearly nine minutes in. Not much to see here folks; just a bunch of smoke and noise; but no fire nor heat to make this feud worth anything at this point.
After the commercial break; we see the MMX2 smoking like a chimney (that the house is on fire) as we cut back to mission control as Daddy-O Cool calls this the "Daddy-O Cool's Track Of Doom". LAME-O! Then we get a classic Mighty Ducks moment: Just after Daddy-O proclaims that you swing or be swung at, the MMX2 simply drives away stage right completely undamaged after the more laser fire. Yeah. So the claw trucks chase after the MMX2 as Wildwing claims that they have an advantage because they have the MMX2 and have beaten these stupid machines with the original Migrator. So we switch to battle mode as all the laser guns and puck cannon come out from the front and the top. Cut to a side shot of mission control; which is apporos since Daddy-O is controlling the machines with his remote control. Digger does have an awesome line in here where he asks if he has termites in his wood. Problem is; this would make sense if the trucks were made of wood. Daddy-O spews more cliches and tells the henchmen to relax. Of course; the second they do that, they REPEAT THE SAME FOOTAGE! The exact same shot of the MMX2 being chased by the claw trucks. I know this because the background has the oil pools and the red painted crane. The blue painted claw truck goes right in this shot and we cut to a closeup of Wildwing yelling to fire the puck cannons; and then as they try to fire the stuff; the laser cannons explode, the puck cannon fires one towards the moon; the front shield gets cut off and goes underneath the MMX2, the battering ram and shields won't come out. Wait, what? Is Daddy-O Cool controlling the thing; or is Tanya the worst inventor in history? Nosedive claims that the thing cannot shoot a spitball properly. But the thing is still driving perfectly; so I'm guessing that Daddy-O Cool is controlling the weaponary. It cannot be that Tanya is stupid now; can't it? Anyhow; the blue claw truck brings out the spiked wrecking ball and smashes it onto the top while the red claw truck almost rams into the MMX2; and then rams the side wheels. At least Nosedive's promo of lasting three seconds was totally false.
So we head back to Daddy-O enjoying himself with his usual bad and woefully outdated even by 1996 standards jive promos. Cut back to Wildwing as he orders Mallory and Grin to get their Duck Cycles to get help. Now I know what you are thinking: They do this and fail due to Daddy-O controlling the cycles somehow. Well; Mallory and Grin plead to let them stay; but orders are orders. So the tailsection opens (which works fine); and Mallory and Grin drive their duck cycles up the stands and up the steep mountain and over without incident. In fact; Digger is complaining to Daddy-O about them escaping; but Daddy-O blows it off because he wants the engine of the MMX2. Yeah; we have a motive for Daddy-O's destruction of the MMX2, but it is lame as well. So the claw trucks knock the MMX2 on it's side just as Nosedive yells that it has been nice knowing Wildwing. Whatever; let's scene change to a sky shot of the speedway as we head to the pools of crude oil as Wildwing and Nosedive are tied up and hung upside down with the red crane. Damn; I knew this would get involved somehow, since they showed it about five times in the episode already! So we see the heels come in from ground level as Daddy-O proclaims that in a few moments, the pigeons will be square no more. Geez; this is the worst attempt to avoid the use of the word die here. Nosedive blows him off because they are alien ducks as Wildwing wants to know who they are. Daddy-O introduces himself and his hobbies in which Nosedive claims that his mother would be proud of him. Ummm; no. Daddy-O calls himself a former conformist which he accuses the ducks of. Wildwing basically claims that they are alien ducks and that is the most non-conformist that you can get. I think a certain band of mutant turtles who got a movie released a few weeks ago might dispute that claim. We then discover that Daddy-O cool fell into the crude oil pool of doom and claims that it was toxic waste. Yes; BS&P strikes again because it clearly looks like oil. No one is buying that this is toxic waste! Who is booking this crap?! That is sarcasm since I do know who is writing this episode. Awful!
So the guise of this is that they turned into mutant heels like Rocksteady and Bebop; and they all sound like Bebop from Ducktales! I like Bebop from Ducktales; but he is much cooler than all of these loser mutants who think they are cool. Even Bebop from TMNT is much cooler than all these three heels combined. He at least had enough coolness to put a ball and chain in his hair in TMNT 3 for the NES. Daddy is of course the savior of Digger and Daddy-O Clone from a life of uncoolness. Yeah; you are cool in the 1950's and you were better off square. But what do I know; I'm a kid from the 1980's natch. Wildwing threatens to scream if he starts reciting poetry. Ummm; you are telling me that Digger wasn't reciting bad jive poetry just five seconds ago? Daddy-O Cool teleports all the way to the MMX2 as the engine is already taken out of it; and we see a green painted monster truck that looks like a dragon. At least the design of this is different. There is also a steel length of pipe attached to the thing for goodness knows what reason. Daddy-O Cool is in the red crane (keep in mind; Daddy looks like a fridge in that crane) and he uses it to put the engine into the Dragon Truck Of Doom while spewing more non-sensecial promos which at this point; I have completely tuned out. He basically has customized the rig. Come to think about it; he sounds like a really awful Louie from TaleSpin now. So Daddy-O Clone takes the pipe and puts it in the oil pool to fill up the gas tank. Just remember; Daddy-O Cool pointed out during his speech that he was thrown in toxic waste even though he was pointing straight at the pool. Now they are filling up the gas tank from said pool. How can anyone with an IQ of eight or more buy that this is toxic waste and not oil? For goodness sakes David Wise; you really hate children if you think they stupid enough to not notice the logic break! So we fill the tank for a while as Nosedive and Wildwing do a "chicken crosses the road" joke, for no good reason. I realize that this is marketed to children; but only kids under the age of five will giggle at this, and your target audience is 6-12 years! Wildwing uses a small tooth dagger to cut the ropes.
So we continue on with Daddy-O Cool trying to sound cool; but he's literally, ironically square. See what I did there? So Nosedive asks him what he wants to do and Daddy-O claims that the earth is not round; it is square which at least is more believable than saying that the earth is flat; but symbolically, that is what Daddy meant. So he's a flat earther; thus he is irreedemable and has no hope for re-education. As the oil is pumped in we finally get the endgame to this story as Daddy proclaims that he is going from town to town in his dragon monster truck to hose the water supplies with "toxic waste". Here's another reason why this is stupid: Isn't crude oil a form of toxic waste? So why bother saying toxic waste? You come off looking like a Captain Planet villain. Not only that; Nosedive had a great chance to actually pull the TMNT mockery card here by saying: "Oh man; he just wants to make more goofy turtles!". Nope; Nosedive mocks him for having too much coffee. Joke doesn't work, chance failed, show sucks! Wildwing calls him mad as Daddy-O tells him to relax basically. Just because I hate his jive talk doesn't mean that I cannot understand it and translate it to saying what he means. So Daddy-O uses the bye, bye birdie as he basically wants to make the ducks his own slaves (so the "toxic waste" is a form of mind control?) as he pushes the button on the crane and the pulley lowers down towards the crude pool of oil. Then we repeat the sky shot of the entire arena and then cut to the cliff with Mallory and Grin on the duck cycles and they have stopped. Grin refuses to leave because Wildwing and Nosedive haven't made it. Wait; so they are teasing that the ducks have died here? If so; the way they booked it is extremely crappy. Mallory refuses to go back because they have their orders to get help as she is the reasonable one here. Grin proclaims that he cannot allow this because of bad karma. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH GRIN'S VOICE HERE? Seriously; he sounds different and raspy here. So Grin basically goes back down the hill and Mallory follows him while blowing off how stubborn Grin is. So ironic coming out of Mallory's mouth too.
So Wildwing finally cuts the ropes after Nosedive is looking worried. Never tie both victims arms behind their back, end to end. Daddy-O's binding skills are so square it might as well be a square sign that sezs: "I'm with stupid!". Nosedive flips over and unties his ankles as the tooth knife drops into the oil to be destroyed of course. Wildwing tells Nosedive that there is no time to unbind Wildwing; and wants him to get to the crane right now. So Wildwing climbs the crane just as Mallory and Grin arrive at the entrance of the speedway. Grin points out that the door is closed as I realize that Daddy-O DID figure out that they might escape. Mallory brings out her puck bazooka cannon in order to solve that little problem with the sliding doors. Pfft; whatever. It's not my fault that you are stupid enough to come back after being told to get help. I should note that Daddy-O called Nosedive a geek as Nosedive climbs to the top of the crane and the rope is really short and it snaps off because Daddy-O is as cheap as the story editor and producer of this show. So Nosedive grabs the rope and does a great spot of hanging onto the crane with the soles of his boots. Wildwing is hanging about two feet from the surface of the oil pool; and he yells at Nosedive to save himself; which Nosedive no sells. So Daddy-O and his minions turn around and like this swinging sparrow like Nosedive; in which Nosedive is blowing him off while hanging onto the rope with his burnt hands and sticky boots of doom. It took nearly 16 minutes for the first good spot of the episode. Then we get the same doors that locked earlier blown away in the explosion and we get the Mallory/Grin run in with the Duck Cycles. Mallory proclaims that they will save them; but Grin asks who will save them. Remember that it was Grin who wanted to return to the speedway; and Mallory wanted to go back to Anaheim to get Duke and Tanya. So the dragon monster truck drives in as Daddy O-Cool is driving and proclaiming that they are on the road to end the segment 16 minutes in. This is so dull and heatless.
After the commercial break; we get the front FPS shot of the dragon truck driving in looking like anime of course. Nosedive cannot hold onto the rope much longer as Mallory is firing pucks at the machine while Grin does the stuntmen drive over the cliff just as Nosedive can no longer hold onto the rope and is forced to release it. Grin is in mid-air; grabs the ankles of Wildwing and lands on the ground safe, just like that. Nosedive then manages to somehow get onto the crane and slide down. Yeah; the entire suspense (if there was any to begin with) is completely gone with this plotline. So Mallory is driving around as the red claw machine comes up from behind. Mallory panics and gets sideswiped as a result; as we see that these truck can be driven manually. I also realize that Daddy-O Clone's real name is Draglips. I cannot take anyone seriously in the monster truck world having that name. That name sucked! So Digger is driving the blue claw machine as the red claw machine join with the dragon truck as Daddy-O Cool and his minion talk for a while about teaching the generation of squares that they will know what it's like to be cool and then they drive out of the arena. Apparently; the blue claw machine disappears in one of the shots. BAD! So the babyfaces huddle together as Nosedive completes unbinding Wildwing's ankles. Wildwing tells Grin and Mallory that the heels are going to pour "toxic waste" into the water supplies on earth and they need to be stopped. I don't see how this plan can bare much fruit unless that dragon truck has wings. Highly unlikely since Daddy-O's mantra is way too small to be taken seriously. Anyhow; there are only two duck cycles, so Nosedive tells Wildwing and Mallory to ride them because Nosedive is going to have a Krackpotkin plan with the MMX2 and a crane in which Mallory is not liking this at all. So Grin and Nosedive go to the MMX2 while Mallory and Nosedive leave on the Duck Cycles. Sky shot of the heels driving on the road and I think this is the exact same shot they used earlier.
So Daddy is driving to make the world back into the 1950's again. He is the defintion of an old fart as we see the duck cycles catch up and Mallory is complaining about how they are going to catch up. Ummm; I think you almost did catch up here. Then I realize that Mallory was wondering how to deal with the trucks three on two heels. Wildwing calls this a good question as he has no answer at this time. Then we get a "Mind Your Cheese & Q's" moment: Now if you recall: Digger is driving the blue claw truck while Dragster (which I guess is Draglips' official name) is driving the red claw truck. Daddy-O orders Dragster to deal with Mallory and Wildwing. So which claw truck turns around to deal with the babyfaces: the blue claw truck driven by DIGGER! Who is the voice director of this show and how can anyone make such an obvious mistake? I swear that the Reeve-Stevens combo is the second coming of Burt Brown and Michael Nelson. Seriously; I would take Ken Koonce and David Weimers over these four losers combined; even with their decline of quality writing. So we cut back to Grin and Nosedive putting in some old engine into the MMX2. Nothing much to see here; except: Did Nosedive just say that the engine was from the Migrator? If so...WHAT THE HELL?! That makes no sense! Does Tanya know about this? So then we get a "The New Gizmo Kids On The Block" moment: As we cut back to Mallory and Wildwing on the duck cycles, the red claw truck is heading towards them! WHAT THE HELL?! This animation team has PEAKED in terms of cheapness. So at this point; we have actually gone about eighteen minutes without actual hockey references, so what do the ducks try next: The Criss Cross play they do from the blue line in hockey. So they criss-cross each other to get each one onto the sides of the red claw truck; they shoot pucks at the truck and force it to go off a cliff and into the abyss below. The red truck crashes front first onto the ground and the rig explodes. Yeah; Dragster has basically been killed in his rig as we never saw him jump out of it. Amazing since TaleSpin usually forces characters to parachute out of planes when they explode.
Instant cutaway to a shot of the old engine in the MMX2; and it looks like they forgot to soften the outlines of them. This makes the fan on the side looks absolutely crappy in terms of animation. So Nosedive is driving the thing out of the arena proclaiming that it's time to save the day and then the MMX2 falls apart and then explodes ON-SCREEN. Yes folks; they did a Looney Tunes spot in a Disney show. The MMX2 is destroyed of course and Grin and Nosedive look shocked on the hard camera shot; and then Nosedive panics and hides behind Grin like a coward (with the seat attached to him natch). So the smoking engine provides cover as the Migrator shows up. Yes; Tanya and Duke have come in to make the save after all. How did they know that the ducks were in trouble? Even worse; how didn't anyone including Daddy-O notice this because the Migrator would have to travel the exact same road that we saw in earlier scenes just to get there. I assume Daddy-O is going back to Anaheim since they were driving from left to right here. Stupid! So we go into the S-curve as Daddy-O orders Digger to turn around and deal with the ducks. The blue claw truck turns around and heads straight for the babyfaces. Wildwing and Mallory bring out the pucks; but they have run out of ammo as the show is so anime like; it's like manga. The blue claw truck thinks he's won; but then we get blue laser fire and it lands in front of the truck. I think you can guess who is coming here. Then the lasers hit the right wheel of the truck causing the truck to tip over onto it's side. Then we get Digger getting out of the truck and heading stage left out of sight as the truck blows up. Yes; Dragster in the eyes of the writers is more useless than Digger so Digger gets the BS&P treatment. Lovely! So we are about two minutes away from the resevoir which I discover is the dam from earlier in the episode. In other words; the writers at least build up the endgame okay. It's just that it has been dull for the most part with a lot of annoying logic breaks. So the Migrator arrives and now has a red retractable windshield as Tanya asks what else needs blowing up.
Wildwing orders Duke to throw him a puck in which Duke is very confused on. Duke throws the puck and Wildwing grabs it as we head to the reservoir of doom as the dragon truck arrives at the damn and out comes the hammer battering ram of death. Yeah; why not? It bashes into the SEAMENT~ wall (it's Jim Cummings and he almost said that word earlier, so why not?) as Wildwing rides in as the backgrounds are getting faker and faker with each passing second. So the duck cycle arrives and somehow manages to jump in mid air without any noticable ramp. WHAT? Then we get probably the dumbest finish I have ever seen: Wildwing lands the Duck Cycle onto the dam. Wildwing proclaims that this is the finish line as Daddy-O calls Wildwing a pelican. Wildwing blows him off and fires one puck into the truck; and it blows up the front with Daddy-O in the front seat! Even worse; BS&P has to step in and have Daddy-O open the passenger door; and somehow slump out of the truck doing these good bumps unharmed while only having a splitting headache. Then it gets worse as the back of the truck splits open and out pours the crude oil/toxic waste and it completely engulfs Daddy-O. Wildwing orders the babyfaces to not step in it even though the waste stops about 2 feet away from the babyfaces standing there, so it means nothing. So Wildwing wonders what horrible result will happen to Daddy-O. Now; this should have been the end of Daddy-O; but then he rises up and he's now a...wait for it...an insurance salesman. WHAT THE F***?! So in other words; if you fall into toxic waste, you become a 1950's mutant and then a second time turns you into a 1950's door to door salesman? I get the joke here; but it's not funny at all because they used crude oil as the stuff to change him. Daddy-O should be dead; or mutated worse than he already was. Screw this show! And then we get another logic break on top of that as Dragster has returned unharmed and both he and Digger scream in horror. I am too; but for an entirely different reason. Namely; HOW DID DRAGSTER LIVE?! So most of the babyfaces repulse in horror as Daddy-O does the hard sell and that's that.
Scene changer of doom and we return to the Arrowhead Pond; and we see on the television, Daddy-O Salesman getting handcuffed by the police which is the only hilarious part that came out of this payoff. So we wrap this up with Nosedive burying Dragonous by claiming that he's a walk in the park. Nice going; tell me why I shouldn't change the channel and watch something else? So Mallory comes in as the babyfaces are sitting down watching television on Drake One as she shows off the blueprints to the Hyper Migrator X 3! Tanya wants to start the project now and the ducks all give her eye contact violence and Gruffi poses. Tanya stammers like an idiot; so indeed, the MMX2 weapons blew up because Tanya is an idiot. So she decides to give up the building of the HMX3 and put the paper into the cabinet for safe keeping as she stammers around to mercifully end the episode at 21:03. This was dull and heatless for the most part; with one of the dumbest finishes ever in DTVA! The logic breaks and animation errors dragged this way down to a DUD (0%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Yeah; a monster truck rally with the ducks looked fine on paper, but with the writers and animators not caring, it turned to crap. Now; most of the episode was written fine as most of the story made sense until the end when it completely fell apart. Daddy-O is not the worst villain out there; but he was annoying me with dated jive talk that wasn't funny. In fact; outside of Wildwing's hilarious acting and Grin's raspy angry voice, there was not much in terms of memorable moments for me. Most of the memorable stuff in this episode was the finish which was the crappiest finish I have seen in this series, even more so than Mad Quacks From Hockey Dome. I realize the joke that they were shooting for here; but trying to insult me with calling oil "toxic waste" (as if that is any better BS&P?) and trying to convince me that it creates door to door salesman might have sounded funny in 1996; but it wasn't funny even in 1996! There were some logic breaks that I have seen in bad Ducktales and Rescue Rangers episodes; only I actually didn't care about any of it. The animation looked horrible in places (fan on the engine); and none of the jokes were good here either. It's basically a dull, boring and heatless episode for about 15 minutes and then it fell off a cliff and went 90 degrees straight down. In other words; a ** episode with a -** finish. So next up is Return Of Asteroth and then from there it's A Traitor Among Us as we wind down the road to the end of this series. So....
Thumbs down for this episode and I'll see you all next time.