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Treasure Of The Golden Suns Part Four

Reviewed: 08/02/2009

The March of the Evil Penguins!!

Well kiddies; we continue on with the Golden Suns story arc with what is happening back in Duckberg with Webby, Mrs. Beakly and the nephews as we begin the real episode for the female characters. Oh; and the theme of this episode: EVIL PENGUINS~! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So let's rant on shall we...?!

This episode was written by Jymn Magon, Bruce Talkington and Mark Zaslove and the story is edited by Jymn Magon. The script was consulted by Tedd Anasti and Patty Cameron. The teleplay was done by Mark Zaslove.

Opening Moment #1: The title card for this one is “Cold Duck” which basically give away the plot well in advance. Go figure.

We begin this episode with the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM with a zoom in and then we cut to in the hallway outside the nephews' room (at least in theory) as Huey, Dewey and Louie pop out from the left side door and they cut an Elmer Fudd promo on Miss Beakly while wearing pots on their heads. Somehow; Kit would be caught dead wearing one of those since Molly's revenge is so sweet isn't it?! They look like complete tools (which is apporos in this case) as they walk onto the red carpet as they come within range as they kneel onto the floor and crawl to the door and open it as the enemy is sighted. We then cut to inside the room as we see Miss Beakly knitting something while Webby is drawing a picture of the nephews beside her. And thus the PC critics whine can be heard from a 40 mile radius. Maybe Beakly LIKES to knit stuff. Have they EVER thought of that? Maybe because I believe in equal rights for all humans instead of reverse sexism to stroke some sort of “justice” (when it's really revenge). And that's why context was invented; when words don't mean jack anymore. Webby shows the drawing of the nephews and it looks very colorful according to in the nephews look like a bunch of cross dressers (check the dresses that they are wearing in the picture..). Not that I mind that sort of thing because they do look funny in dresses; but despite all the humiliation that Kit suffered; he has yet to wear a dress. Baloo on the other hand isn't so lucky.

Webby blows off the nephews because they'll make fun of it and they don't like her bothering them. Geez; I wonder why Webby?! You basically drew them wearing DRESSES for crying out loud! Webby believes that she's only a tag-along to them. Okay; that sounds awfully contrived for Webby to say something like that. More like: They think I'm a whiny crying baby would have more realistic and considering how the nephews sob later on; she has a case of projection on their part. Beakly has her doubts about the nephews liking her. NO?! REALLY?! I guess turning their backs on Scrooge in episode #3 wasn't ENOUGH for her to be convinced that they want her hide. She decides to give them some time to think it over and so Louie has the tuning fork and bangs it onto the golden door; causing it to wobble. We know this because there are white sound waves coming from the fork. Louie opens the door and places the end of the fork into the keyhole and then they bail. That is one BIG ASS keyhole there as the sound gets louder as the whole room rumbles and Beakly thinks she's in trouble. And then anything that has glass in it breaks including a photo picture frame of Scrooge's family (apparently) and Beakly calls out the nephews and...Oh lord; that was terrible acting on Joan Gerber's part. She didn't sound remotely sharp at all. I'm beginning to see why Ginny MacSwain was hired now as a voice dialog director. It's because she can get people to actually act including small children.

The nephews run back into their room (I thought they were supposed to get the garage? That's logic break #1 for the episode; although Scrooge could have been ribbing them on that so...) towards their beds. This is going to backfire since they have those goofy pots on their hands. They slam the door shut (which hurts their cause even more) as Miss Beakly arrives all piss and vinegar (YAY!) and knocks on the door. Beakly blows them off for causing trouble as the nephews move the triplet bunk bed against the door. Interesting question: What is those golden letters on the top of the door? One of them is H; but I cannot tell the other two. I guess; it's the first letters of the nephews. The nephews goldbrick in more ways than one which might sound good with heels; but with babyfaces, it is just not funny. Beakly invokes the tuning fork as her evidence against them. Louie proclaims that it's Duckworth; but then incriminates himself by proclaiming that they want it back.

That was not smart Louie as Beakly threatens to use it on them as payback. I approve of this; if only for entertainment value and the fact that the nephews should NOT be protected from any sort of torture. Even if it's a tuning fork. The nephews sit on the bottom of the bed as Dewey proclaims that she'll never dare. Too late Dewey; Beakly has already started it up and of course the whole place rumbles like crazy. HAHA! Nice floating bounce effect from TMS as everything gets destroyed. The nephews realize that it's not the tuning fork; but it's a big ass airplane piloted by Launchpad McQuack. I take 5:1 odds that he crashes the supply plane. And he doesn't; but he makes up for it by crushing Scrooge's fountain in the front driveway. HAHA! The hatches of the plane open as we cut to the cockpit as Launchpad calls bingo and it's right on target. HAHA! I hope Beakly gets all fussy on him; just for a laugh. LP runs out of the plane as he looks for provisions for Mr. McD. So we logically head to.....

.outside Scrooge's garage (check the limo in the left garage door) as Launchpad goes into the right one and we see him inside throwing various camping gear and other international objects into the steel wheelbarrow. He runs out making a mess (what a shock?!) as Miss Beakly demands answer like a fussy old lady. Oh wait; that's her character; my mistake. Launchpad apologizes because he has no time for joyrides. BWHAHAHAHAHA! Like I'm taking that seriously from him. Launchpad pushes Miss Beakly and Webby onto the wheelbarrow and thus I laugh at the irony of it all as they get pushed and shoved off-screen into the big-ass airplane. LP pushes the wheelbarrow outside as he explains what Mr. McD is going which is the South Pole of course. More pushing as Beakly comes out with Webby telling that Scrooge will need warm clothes and she'll need her scarf. Well; he did say that he would allow his family to come along this time so it makes complete sense.

So we cut to Webby going to the door outside the nephew's room asking them if they heard about Scrooge. Webby knocks on the door and there is no answer and then she casually walks in. UH OH! I do not like where this is going at all. She looks inside and the place is ransacked; but no nephews. Phew! The nephews aren't going to get back at her for drawing them in dresses as we see the nephews use the ladders from the triplet bunk bed as a ladder (How does that work?) as they don't want the tag-along to follow them. See; I don't like the writers forcing the point here. It's clear that the nephews think that she's a girl and a coward and a baby. This is too BS&P for my liking. They want to hide in the plane; and Webby just hurts her heat a bit by tagging along and following them with her pink purse. Again; this would actually work in TaleSpin or Gummi Bears (they are in eras which sexism is expected; although TaleSpin handled their female characters equally with the men; minus the strong warrior woman persona); but this was asking for trouble in Ducktales (in an era where these roles were already causing trouble with feminists.). Personally; I cannot see Webby with a pink purse climbing down without giggling my butt off.

So Webby and the nephews run into the big ass plane from the backside as Launchpad is in the cockpit getting ready to roll. Showing that the phrase existed long before 9/11 drove it to the ground. Launchpad pulls the horn rope and the hatches all close as Webby cries for help. Oh great! She was doing so well until she started whining too. Launchpad's next stop is Antarctica. The engines start and begin to roar as Beakly arrives with the scarf; but the plane lifts before she can get Launchpad to stop. Beakly doesn't see any problems with this until she sees Webby in the window pressing her face in a cute fashion. So Beakly grabs the bouncing sofa (navy blue I might add) and jumps on it; as the power of bouncy suggestion allows Beakly to grab onto the wheel proclaiming that she is coming for Webby. I got a handed to her; she noticed her better than Rebecca did in Plunder and Lightning Part Two. Still; Webby is a wimp compared to Molly.

Launchpad turns the engines forward and then flies away as then he notices a red alert light flashing on his control panel (the southeastern button); and he declares the landing gear to be stuck. He then flips the switch onto autopilot which turns Wii blue and then walks into the storage area to check on the trouble. Launchpad goes over to the gray CHEST OF DEMONS to check on something as Webby shows up and asks nicely; but Launchpad tells her he isn't interested in autographs. Then he gets the LIGHTBULB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY and notices Webby is here and wants to know what she's doing here. Webby stammers and Launchpad decides that the landing gear is more important anyway; so he'll figure it out later. Not a bad idea LP; you don't want any fussy tough chicken ducks on the brakes. AHHAHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummmm...Launchpad opens the landing gear and there is Mrs Beakly holding onto the wheel screaming for help like a banshee. Well; she does have a slightly better scream than Rebecca Cunningham; I'll give her that much. Webby yells for her Granny as Launchpad grabs Beakly by the scarf and pulls her in without much effort as the wheels come into position. OUCH! If Toon Disney doesn't cut that scene out; it'll make the one where Kit (as a seal) gets lassoed by Seymour look like a downplay instead of a legit concern for children's well being.

Beakly pants and then gets all pissy on Webby for being on the plane and Webby gleefully answers that one for me: She was only looking for the nephews. Now that's a good answer and it makes Webby the innocent kid on this mission as Beakly is PISSED and demands the nephews come out this second. Huey, Dewey and Louie come out and blow her off for being a tattletale and that they cannot trust a girl. You know what's hilarious about this is that Quack Pack Huey was 100% the opposite of this in that he was completely gullible when it came to girls and still sounded like a sexist twit. Compared that to Kit Cloudkicker; who couldn't trust male adults at first and then he had no problems praising a female and being NICE to them. Webby feels bad about all this and I'm really liking her now. Beakly orders Launchpad to return to Duckberg as their nanny in which Launchpad blows off because he cannot do that. That's because Scrooge is hunting for the second half of the treasure map (something Disney Captions misses by the way); and if the homing signal dies (death reference #1); he's a goner. I just love how the writers can use the word die for an object; but not for a person. You're not fooling anyone Jymn Magon. Besides; Scrooge DID say that he wanted the nephews along anyway; so blame him for this. Oh; and Launchpad gets his scarf stuck in the steel box to bring the funny even more. So that logically leads to.....

.The South Pole as there are freezing winds howling and ice all along as we pan over to a snow bank as the big ass airplane lands on it with a MAN-SIZED bump just to amuse me. The back hatch open as he welcomes everyone to beautiful, frozen Antarctica. We then already cut to the babyfaces walking on the ice in their fur coats as the beeping device beeps in Launchpad's hands. At least it's not a drink box this time. I don't really get how anyone can live; much less ducks in these conditions without about 20 layers of gear on their entire bodies (as Webby and the nephews aren't even wearing boots); but then again; Kit was able to do well in Thembria so I guess it's fuzzy cartoon logic. I'm sure someone will say otherwise though. The beeping gets stronger as Launchpad declares that Scrooge should be over the snowbank. And then a female penguin (check the white bow) runs over the snowbank and bowls LP over allowing him to take a MAN-SIZED bump right to his kisser on the ground. HAHA! That's the spirit Launchpad! If you cannot crash a big ass plane; let the penguin make you into the bump machine that you are. AHHAHAHAHAHA!

She runs behind Webby as Launchpad gets up from his snow angel spot (and this one is completely apporos given where we are); and we see a walrus (Frank Welker, DUH!) growling at them with the raft in tow. I see Scrooge made it after all. Everyone bails (with Webby taking the girl penguin stage right) as the walrus is now a walking overbite according to Mrs. Beakly. Beakly of course makes the fatal error as the walrus suddenly turns all bull on us on the movement of her girly scarf. I guess that makes sense if the walrus was watching Bugs Bunny shorts; but otherwise, this is logic break #1 for the episode. The walrus rushes Beakly and Beakly tells it to heel. Yeah sure; like he is suddenly a dog Mrs. Beakly. No wonder the nephews think she sucks. She bails like the coward that she is and Launchpad goes over to grab the rope and trips (duh) which sets up him riding the raft like a bull horse. That leads to the SCOOBY DOO CHASE SEQUENCE THE FUSSY EDITION~! Good bumping from LP as Dewey finally invokes the Gruffi pose just to annoy me; while Huey and Louie have the LASSO OF BANE TO ALL ACTION CARTOONS EVERYWHERE.

Dewey goes all sarcastic on us as Beakly and the walrus head to the icy abyss from the far sky shot as Huey and Louie lasso the tusks on the walrus as Dewey tells Beakly to break left and she runs left; just missing the abyss by ten feet. The walrus goes over the walrus through slippage; but they forget to help Launchpad and he follows because we just have to get the bump machine to bump in a pointless scene now. And he takes a decent bump upside down into the snowbank on the other side. Launchpad pops from the raft and on a scale of one to ten; he gives it a C+. Which is slightly better than Baloo's landing in Plunder and Lightning Part One. That would be a seven and a half on the ten point scale by the way. We cut to the nephews as they wonder how it got onto the walrus and Louie deducts that Scrooge used it to hitch a ride with the big guy.

Now that the homing beeper is lost; Scrooge is lost and they cannot find him as Webby walks in with her new friend it looks like and Huey blows her off as another tag along. Can you smell the sexism coming out of Huey on THAT one? I'm beginning to think QP Huey's sexism isn't all that different from the original Huey. Well; that's ONE thing they didn't character slaughter in 1996 and now I wish that they DID. Webby gets Beakly's scarf (Good; it was making her look too girly for my tastes anyway) and the penguin gets it as a symbol of Webby's friendship with the penguin. Webby proclaims that she likes them; but Huey blows it off because they don't like her. I also love that TMS stopped drawing their hats; even though on certain shots you could see their baseball caps just underneath the hood. I'm tempted to call that a CONTINUITY ERROR; but the nephews could have pulled them down further to hide them. They blow her off because Scrooge is lost in the snow. You call THAT an excuse to act like a sexist guys?! Beakly suggest backtracking the walrus' trail and finding the uncle that way. Now that's a good idea Mrs. Beakly; but I betcha the nephews blow her off on that. I check the DVD....Damn; I'm good. At least they did it nicely this time around.

So we cut to the top of a cliff as the snow continues to come down. Isn't this more of a North Pole thing? Never mind; this place takes place in an alternative reality of the world so I'll let it slide. We pan down to the trail of the walrus as the group discovers an ice cave with crystal like icicles. They rush inside and they make it to an icy lake where the tracks end. Considering that there's no snow left; I say the options are very narrow at this point. One of the nephews (I cannot tell which with the fur coats that they are wearing) points to an ice wall and there is a symbol of the golden sun cut on the wall; the same one Scrooge found on a golden coin. To the left of that; is a dollar sign which is Scrooge's mark. Oh yeah; let's make his MONEY, MONEY, YEAH, YEAH image so obvious why don't we?! So the nephews walk on as Launchpad arrives at the frozen river and he taps on the river and it's as hard as LP's noggin. HEE HEE! If you cannot guess what he does next and the bad thing that will happen to him then you have no business reading this rant. Damn; I'm good as the nephews skate on thick ice to help catch LP. The nephews do figure eights easily as Webby wants in on the fun; but Beakly protects her like a mother hen. Well; she is a duck so it makes somewhat sense. LP has fallen and he can't get up! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! He gets on his knees and uncorks the flare gun so he can throw a little light on the situation.

I betcha Toon Disney cut THAT one out; which is sad because that's the first time a gun has been shot in any context in DTVA. It's not bullet shooting; but it's close. Of course by the time P&L gets here; we have a 2.0+ Trigun pilot. Beakly tries to say no; but he has already fired the shot ten seconds before she said it. She has got to work on that timing as the ROCKETS RED FLARE flares up and it feels like a seizure is coming on. Or maybe not. The shot bounces off the cave (which makes no sense since the heat would have melted the ice by now) and cuts a giant icicle as Beakly and the females bail. I don't know why since the giant icicle nails the river and not them; but the ice starts breaking apart; so that is the reason. The nephews and LP are on little ice floes as the river carries them away. Beakly tries to tell them to hopscotch across; but no dice as they head into the cave together. Beakly panics as they wave because they don't want to be left behind. Strangely; I think that is a good thing. So we logically go into the dark icy river cave as the nephews and LP surf on the ice floe and Launchpad wants some brake; but will not get any. Unless he bumps and becomes one of course. They duck in order to deal with the shorter roof; but that turns into a moot point as they are going over the ice waterfall which doesn't seem dangerous since it's only about six feet tops. Bad form there TMS as the segment ends exactly nine minutes in.

After the commercial break; we REPEAT THE SEQUENCE of panic from the last five seconds as they fall down the ice water fall and manage to get down without further incident. One of the nephews calls it a roller coaster as Launchpad is happy that the ice floe is sea worthy. I guess it is when it's about 20 feet of ice. One of the nephews wonders where they are being taken as we get a shot of the river of ice floes. Then we cut back to the females as Webby whines that they are gone. Beakly proclaims that they'll find them; or so she hopes as the female penguin finally talks and the female mallards get the LIGHTBULB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY. She is Skittles the Penguin and I can sense a candy reference and rainbow puns somewhere along the line. She is voiced by Patty Parris who has done pretty much nothing but voice act since Jabberjaw in 1976. She was Cindy Mae and Rita in Yogi shows after 1978; was Helen Little in The Littles, and Pammy Panda in Shirt Tales. She debuted in 1983 as Daisy Duck (aka Belle) in Mickey's Christmas Carol and appeared on Dumbo Circus as Lilly The Cat. Her DTVA debut was on Gummi Bears doing a few cameo roles (along with Ducktales); but her major DTVA role until 1999 was Winnie The Pooh as Christopher Robin's mother and Kanga. She also appeared in the movie Look Who's Talking Now and the video game Herc's Adventures as Hera in 1997. Apparently; she has been doing commercials ever since 1999. And I'm not convinced in that girl female voice of Skittles since she's supposed to be pretty young.

At least Russi Taylor makes Webby sound somewhat like a seven year old girl. Skittles had a shortcut as they walk down the icy spiral staircase as Skittles' name is revealed by Webby and Skittles explains that she is not supposed to talk to strangers. After all; there is nothing stranger than a bunch of fully clothed ducks. AHHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummm....I have got to learn to stop mocking Mrs. Beakly like that when SHE is in the scene. Skittles also has no friends either as the sad music comes out as if she has cancer or something. Although having no friends is probably WORSE. Having no family WORST of all; so the music fits a lot better than it does in Mister T episodes. They exchanges notes and pleasure thoughts (and gifts). She explains that she likes colors because everything is a dull white. And you can hear Mr. Hardcore whine like a little baby even WORSE than Webby EVER COULD. Because they HATE colors see; except for brown, the color of feces. They manage to get to the bottom of the river as we see the icy town of “Unhappy Feet” as Skittles explains that the town wants color and they'll fight for every scrap of it. OUCH! I would not want to be the nephews' duck legs if you catch my drift since they are colored orange. Skittles proclaims that there is no telling what might happen to them. I doubt it since Disney is notorious for PROTECTING the nephews from anything painful at ALL COSTS.

So we logically go inside the ice city as the nephews and Launchpad are walking on an ice bridge. Ah; I see that they made it off the ice floe so there is no logic break there. The nephews are in awe of the city as they deduce that this is where Scrooge is. One of the nephews thinks that the natives are pop treats; but another one blows it off because they are penguins and nervous ones at that. The evil penguins arrive just in time as they surround over male heroes (well; 3 of them and one big sexist.) and they blitz into the FCC FRIENDLY DUSTCLOUD FIGHT OF DEATH. Now in TaleSpin; this often leads to the babyface comeback; but in other shows, the heel usually wins these ones. And they do as they steal their fur coats and regular clothes to boot; leaving them in their under suits. HAHA! The nephews protest this outrage; but the mayor penguin has Scrooge's top hat and fur coat looking like a dick. Launchpad rises as he calls them out because he's the personal pilot of Scrooge McDuck. You know; wearing that white under suit of his just makes me laugh my ass off. I cannot take Launchpad seriously when he's wearing THAT. They even took his boots too; those bastards! The mayor (Terry McGovern) asks if he know McDuck and Launchpad calls them brothers. I cannot handle this; this is too funny. And he crosses his fingers as we logically lead to.....

.An ice jail cell (even the window bars are made of ice) as the nephews get thrown in and they take MAN-SIZED bumps into the ice wall. Well; that's ONE instance where the nephews took a sick bump. The last one does the sickest bump by using his head. OUCH! Launchpad gets the HEEVE HO HOPPO OF DOOM inside of course. POW! OUCH! Ummm...and he takes the official second sickest bump in DTVA history into the ice wall. HOLY CRAP?! TMS has it's working boots on when it comes to manly sick bumps. LP calls them renegades from a prom and I cannot contain myself after hearing that from him. The Unhappy Feet penguins have the hose and they ice down the door turning it into icicles. Now that's a neat way to keep prisoners in as Launchpad has to shake icicles from his face and calls it a cold reception. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. The nephews do an human ladder chain again and notice that Uncle Scrooge is inside the right side jail cell in his white under shirt as even his shin guards were stolen. How these ducks aren't freezing to death is beyond me. At least they didn't steal his glasses; which indicates that they hate old people and so they don't dress like them.

Scrooge is happy to see Huey and asks for Launchpad. Like he could tell them apart without the cap colors as Launchpad calls himself present and accounted for. Huey asks what happened as Scrooge exchanges notes on the situation. And he does a MAN-SIZED bump onto the ice as he explains that he was arrested for attempted robbery. Launchpad suggests getting back to the plane; but Scrooge goes against it because they'll freeze without the fur coats on. Launchpad tells Scrooge that Beakly hasn't been captured yet and Scrooge sees some hope left. I betcha the nephews blows that off. I check the DVD...Damn; I'm good and man; what a bunch of sexists these kids are. And that's the only character design THEY kept for Quack Pack as Scrooge looks on from a zoom out shot as we see the Ice Jail Of Icy Doom as Skittles proclaims that it's too late and they never save them now. Beakly never says never (which is folly because she said never already) and she has a MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN. Now this I have got to see. Mrs Beakly walks stage right and then screams....really badly (spoke too soon) as she sees a giant walrus stuck in a block of ice. Man; she's wimpier than Shaggy and Scooby put together. Apparently walruses eat penguins; but he's on ice so he's no threat. Although I'm sure that he'll be used at some point since this is DTVA 1987ish and not DTVA 1997ish. So Skittles has to find a place for them to hide as they climb up the icy white road. That logically leads to.....

...Inside Skittles house (which is all dull white too) as we cut to Skittles room which looks no different than a regular girl's room all things considered. Skittles plays guard to watch out for nasty penguins as we pan over to Mrs. Beakly putting coal dust on Webby. HOLY CRAP?! I've heard of racists putting white paint on black people; but this is in reverse. REVERSE RACISM RULEZ! Or not....See Webby is going to be her real friend as a penguin. Interesting enough; Baloo did something similar for Feminine Air. Skittles giggles as she brings out the winter coat to replace the fur coat Webby is wearing. However; Skittles mother (Patty Parris again and that is it for the characters for this pilot actually.) calls out and now Skittles has to tell Mrs. Beakly to hide. Skittles ushers Mrs. Beakly into the icy closet and closes it as Webby puts on the penguin suit while Skittle's mother finally enters and is pleased that she has a new friend. She is basically a big penguin with female rollers on her skull.

And of course she buys into the act despite the duck legs giving the act away. She is glad Skittles has a friend and Skittles blushes because it is no big deal. Skittles mother decides to leave to get a “Webbi-cure” which shows that the female mannerism are still in effect at this point. She also blows off the beak as she needs a beak job. Geez; how dumb can you be to notice that and not think it's a penguin?! The door closes as Skittles calls it close. If she cannot tell by the beak that it is not a penguin; then you are going to have zero trouble fooling the penguin population. Webby panics as they open the closet and Beakly drops down frozen stiff. HAHA! She recovers in seconds as she feels like a TV dinner. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. The next move is for Beakly to get everyone's clothes back and for the kids to stay right here. This plan is going to fail like a MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN would; I just know it. Beakly leaves as the two friends wink in unison. I think they know exactly what will happen to her... HEH HEH HEH....

Well; before we finally see Beakly thrown in jail (we think); we head to the icy color museum as the penguin female kids climb up the stairs. Oh; and there is even a penguin police guard watching the place. Sadly; he has no guns on him and only a club to counter. He doesn't suspect a thing which shows even heel police officers are dumber than normal heels even in this show. Skittles and Webby practice the fine art of not being seen and they sneak into the icy gallery. They enter inside as we see various painting and stuff which looks pretty good. I just love this projection of them claiming that own the map; when they stole it from Juan in the first place. Not that it makes Scrooge any better; but still, it's projection. And right in the middle of the back wall is an ice cube containing both parts of the map. Webby is upset that it's encased in ice as Skittles explains how they protect colorful works of art. And nothing will break the ice see as we cut to the jail cells as Beakly whisper yells to the boys (which is perfectly okay in this case) and the boys are happy to see that Beakly made it without getting caught as Scrooge is happy to see her too.

She throws in their clothes and the nephews are impressed of her; but will not be convinced until she busts them out of there. So she throws in the tuning fork to convince them otherwise. Dammit; I just knew that thing would be used somehow. Louie grabs the fork (glad to see the hoods are gone now; and so I can tell them apart as Louie bangs the tuning fork against the ice wall. Umm; check your internal logic guys; they should be nailing the right side wall since Scrooge was there...AND there was a window to boot. Logic break #2 for the episode and the first one I don't accept. There is something crumbling as the ice wall crumbles slowly in front of Scrooge. Oh; it's the chances for this pilot to beat Plunder and Lightning. Well; they tried and #5 will be awesome I'm sure of that, but the title is gone from their grasps now. They at least lasted longer than Rescue Rangers did. The wall crumbles as they enter into Scrooge's cell and Scrooge gets his top hat and fur coat as well. Louie strikes the tuning fork on the next wall (which is fine; but the logic is already doomed) and everyone starts doing the rumble dance of doom as the entire jail house crumbles to the ground on the far shot. That is one nasty tuning fork Louie has. Sadly; it also shatters the ice of the giant ass walrus encased in ice and he looks nasty as he blinks his eyes to end the segment sixteen minutes in...Well; what do you know; Beakly's plan actually worked. Too bad it worked way to well.

After the commercial break; we cut to the remains of the jail house as Beakly is all right and isn't damaged at all while the males pop out from the snow. DTVA hating females? Where ever did critics get THAT idea from? FeminiNazi's?! Never mind; let's move on before Godwin's Law befalls on me. Huey thinks that will show those penguins and of course the penguins surround them again. Scrooge wants Beakly to get Webby; while Scrooge and the nephews get the map as LP finally pops from the carnage. Launchpad has to bail to the surface to warm up the plane as everyone bails in three different directions. The penguins naturally pick on the elders and children because picking on the female is wrong and Launchpad is too funny to be caught. I think that's their fatal mistake right there. I would go after Launchpad for obvious reason. That leads to the SCOOBY DOO CHASE SEQUENCE THE PENGUINS VS DUCKS EDITION~! And it's not even hockey season yet!

We get some running into the city as they make it to the ice museum without further incident; until the penguins start throwing snowballs at them which causing Scrooge to lose his top hat. Bastards! Even more so as we seen them in their snow throwing tanks as the mayor demands that Scrooge surrenders. Who in the hell is supplying these evil penguins?! Gyro Gearloose?! This looks like his handiwork. They only want colors as Scrooge bluffs them on his word. They run inside as the snowballs are thrown and none of them actually hit which is awfully lame. They are JUST snowballs; I think the QUACKEROONIES OF DOOM can take a hit off of them. It's not like TaleSpin; where they use real bullets you know. They finally meet Webby and Skittles at the entrance as the mayor fires again and Huey, Dewey and Louie take nasty shots to the back of the head with the snowballs. Now THAT'S the spirit Jymn Magon! Nice to see a kid TAKING that bump for a change. Although we will have to wait until 1990 before a female takes that bump. Three times as Webby is in horror. About damn time the nephews didn't get protection from Disney as the penguins in their snowball throwing tanks go in for the kill (with snowballs? Yeah right?!) and then they scream and scatter like a bunch of scalded dogs.

The SHADOW OF DOOM engulfs Scrooge and here comes the giant ass walrus out for revenge due to extreme ice encasement. He absolutely MURDERS the museum with his claws as Scrooge panics because the map is in there. Looks like Beakly's plan has backfired somewhat. The babyfaces bail with Scrooge in tow as the giant ass walrus (Frank Welker, DUH!) as we hear Beakly's voice again calling her Lardo. If she's here to clean up the mess she made as a result of her plan then I'm all for it. She takes the scarf away from Skittles and she plays El Matador with it. Nice to see the movement of the cape being used since it's realistic; but this is a cartoon and besides; it's a walrus. I think the color red can be used here without anger from me. But the thought was certainly there though. The walrus falls for it and everyone bails following Mrs Beakly in town.

And so we get the SCOOBY DOO CHASE SEQUENCE THE GIANT ASS WALRUS EDITION~! POW! OUCH! Ummm... And the ice bridge gets destroyed of course. Beakly throws the scarf to the nephews as they make it to the ice bridge outside town; but Beakly runs stage left. Why? So she can play hero and save Scrooge's map silly. This is her FOCUS episode after all. They nephews slide down the ice railing of the bridge and make it to the other side; but the walrus is gaining on them. D'OH! Walrus make it to the other side as the nephews bail cutting a feet don't fail me now promo. We then see Scrooge, Skittles and Penguin Webby talk to each other as the evil adult penguin bouncers return to surrounds the elder and children. Geez; even the penguins are visiting Larson and Gary. That is not going to help their images as cute babyfaces in any way. Certainly won't help Happy Feet which is of course Glenn Beck's most hated movie ever. Scrooge grabs the kids (umm; isn't that kidnapping since Skittles is a real penguin?)....

..and we get another SCOOBY DOO CHASE SEQUENCE THE EVIL ROID RAGE PENGUINS EDITION~! Geez; there is a lot of running in this one. You could mistake this as a Scooby Doo episode. AHHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummm.... We then see Mrs. Beakly at the steps and the babyfaces run up the stairs as we cut back to inside the ice cave as the nephews use the scarf to deal with the giant ass walrus. I'm suspecting that this is punishment for the nephews being a bunch of sexists; but I must be hearing things since Disney would NEVER allow it for THAT reason. Right?! The walrus causes some kick ass damage to the ceiling and walls of the cave as we cut back to a cave where Scrooge and the females are being chased by the penguins. This is turning into a Scooby Doo episode. They are on them like fluff on a chicken's bottom so claims Scrooge. Okay; that is more disturbing than you have intended Scrooge McDuck. They run out of the cave and meet at the fork in the ice road as they meet and run off and leave the ice cave while Mr. Walrus causes more damage as usual and with the penguins running close behind.

Now at this point; if logic serves me well; the penguins should run away now because the walrus could EAT them; but of course they give chase as if nothing had happened. Logic break #3 for the episode. So we get more running as finally it ends as the babyfaces are near the ice cliff on the far shot and the giant ass walrus is ready to MURDER them good. Huey proclaims that they cannot make it and I put odd makers at 2:1 that Launchpad arrives in his big ass supply plane to save them. Scrooge tells them too as Mr. Walrus finally starts to slip and slide on the ice as Launchpad arrives with the big ass supply plane. Damn; I'm good. He opens the hatch and scoops up our heroes and Mr. Walrus into the plane. D'OH! He was THAT close to ending this episode on a good note; but he just had to continue their pain for my gain. AHHAHAHAHA! The penguin mutter to themselves as Skittles mother yells that they stole her baby. Ummm; they didn't steal your baby; they KIDNAPPED your baby. BS&P RULEZ!

So we have problems as Huey complains about his foot (according to Disney captions) as we cut to inside as the walrus growls and if you look closely; there is enough space to prevent such thing. Unless Huey is implying that the walrus was tickling his foot; but that's absurd because Disney would NEVER allow that to happen to the nephews. Everyone bails as we cut to Launchpad flying in the cockpit as there is crashing and shattering about and he blows them off for it. We cut back as the babyfaces grab onto the ladder hooks to prevent Mr. Walrus from grabbing them. This doesn't work because there is too much space for Mr. Walrus to grab them unless they think the walrus is too lazy to grab them. So Scrooge sees the conveniently placed red alarm encased in glass and he breaks the glass and that turns on the alarm as Mr. Blubber (so sezs Scrooge) backs up and the hatch opens and the plane tips allowing the walrus to drop down (along with some cargo which I'm sure will come into play in episode #5) and he free falls into the icy water below. Scrooge thanks them for rescuing him as Mr. Blubber is encased in ice again which makes little sense; but whatever. The nephews finally concede that Mrs. Beakly did her job well and thus they stopped being upset with her anymore. Sadly; Webby is still considered a tag along in their eyes.

However; Webby really redeems herself as Scrooge proclaims that he wants the map; so Webby unscrews her doll's head and shows her a copy of the map which she drew with her color sticks. And it's a reasonable version of it too. Well; that officially makes the nephews really look bad now as Launchpad points out the evil penguins are still on the ground as the plane cannot land; so Skittles will have to parachute out. The nephews bail because they have a surprise for her as Webby gives Skittles her color sticks (even though they are clearly using the Crayola logo on them so they are crayons. Copyright laws are AWESOME! NOT!) as a going away present and I am so loving this scene. Beakly gives her the scarf again (when in doubt REPEAT THE SPOT again!); and Skittles thanks them all for their kindness. The nephews run in and strap on the parachute on Skittles' back as we cut to the side shot of the air plane as the hatch opens and Skittles jumps out (with Geronimo of course). Webby asks what is the surprise they gave Skittles and the parachute opens and it is in rainbow colors. Well; they finally got their sexism out of their systems. Good for them and it really helps their heat now. Skittles lands in her mother's arms and they hug as the parachute covers the penguins in a rainbow tomb. HEE HEE! Too bad that they are still heels in the eyes of the mallards; even if Skittles is the only babyface. So we cut to the sun sets slowly in the west as the giant ass plane flies to it's last destination. Where as Launchpad asks. To the Valley of the Golden Suns. The screen stays frozen to end the episode at 21:15. Well; the challenge is over, but what an effort as they end with an awesome finish. Sadly; the logic breaks mounted up too much. Still; it will be better than the Rescue Rangers pilot.... **** ½ (90%).


Well; they tried and the logic breaks finally fell them as a bad logic break in that Louie nailed the opposite wall without a cell window which shouldn't have Scrooge in it. All the more sadder when this is a clear animation mistake on the part of TMS. And of course; they broke logic on the walrus/penguin thing since the penguins should have retreated instead of following the walrus. Still; those were really the only big problems with the episode. I'm also thankful that they finally ended the nephews sexism with Beakly and Webby because it was becoming overbearing to the point where I was thinking that DT Huey and QP Huey were not as different as they seemed. Mrs. Beakly was really good and her fussiness was actually quite muted. And when she was fussy; it was justified. Webby was pretty good as well; but that whiny voice has got to be reduced if she is going to be more than just a decent character.

I like Skittles and she really did a good job in the finish which I felt was excellent; although having Patty Parris voice act her was a mistake. She fits her mother's voice pretty good; but Russi Taylor would have been a better fit. She sounded like the female version of Pip from Luminous Arc II on the Nintendo DS with that silly British accent on a child routine. Launchpad was Launchpad; and I was laughing my ass off with his serious routine while wearing white under suit. Also; while TMS' logic might have gone south; their animation and bumping did not as I was glad for once that they allowed the nephews to TAKE a hit; unlike the protectionism Disney usually gives them. Overall; this episode did rule; but the breaks prevented the full monty which they needed to have a chance at Plunder and Lightning's crown. Still; unlike Rescue Rangers, I have seen episode #5 before and I really enjoyed this one and it really defined the whole pilot actually. It also allowed the characters to do something that probably wouldn't get past BS&P today. What is it?! Stay tuned to....Gold Alcohol Syndrome; or as Mrs. Beakly nicely puts it Gold Fever. So......

Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you next time.


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