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Dime Enough For Luck
With Friends Like Gladstone; who needs enemies?!
Okay; we have yet another battle between Scrooge protecting his McGruffin against Magica stealing his McGruffin. And to makes matter more interesting (or annoying for Scrooge); he now has another nemesis to deal with. A certain Gladstone Gander. Oh goody; a character named after a major comic book too. So let's rant on shall we...?!
This episode is written by Jymn Magon, Bruce Talkington and Mark Zaslove. Wow; just wow... The story is consuited by Tedd Anasti and Patsy Cameron and the story is edited by Jymn Magon. The teleplay is done by Diane Duane. Diane started on the Flintstone Comedy Show in 1980 and was a nothing writer until 1996 when we see some interesting stuff from him like Privateer 2: The Darkening, Space Island One, Ring of the Nibelungs and Barbie: Fairytopia, along with Spiderman: Unlimited.
We begin this one at the gate of Scrooge's Mansion as an orange coat, blur shin guards, blue tie, beige hat and Mickey Mouse gloves duck with a newspaper walks up to Scrooge's front door. He rings the door bell with his black cane with the gold plated top and he looks like Scrooge McDuck at age 25. Scrooge opens the door and they greet each other. Scrooge addresses him as Gladstone and of course this is none other than Gladstone Gander (Rob Paulsen) who is pretty much an annoyance to Scrooge for reasons I cannot put my finger on right now. To be quite honest; I rarely ever see him other than my advance watching of this in prep work for the rants, so right now I cannot comment on him until I see him do stuff. Although the 20 year old Scrooge routine is a little bit silly in my view. And Gladstone is on time according to Scrooge's watch which I'm sure kids will never get. Does anyone on this show realize why the new Disney is dumb down so much now? Because kids don't understand complex speaking such as this and thus change the channel. He then steals the newspaper from Gladstone (much to Glandstone's confusion) and then they walk down the driveway towards the gate. Gladstone blows him off for being a cheapskate (HA!) and Scrooge tells him to bite his tongue. Stupidity question of the episode: How can anyone bite their tongue in this series when they don't have any teeth? How many times have we seen any duck character's teeth in this series. I cannot recall one yet. Scrooge blows off Gladstone's thrifty skills which earns a blow off the suggestion because he has LUCK see.
We then walk onto the sidewalk as Scrooge explains that MONEY, MONEY, YEAH, YEAH gets through times of no luck. Don't you mean being thrifty with the money Scroogie? That makes more sense and makes you look less like a greedy bastard. Gladstone claims that he has never had any times of no luck which means Gladstone is a luck magnet as a character. Oh goody; this should be interesting for me to mock. And of course he falls into the conveniently placed steel hose with a wussy off-screen bump. Scrooge mocks him for that one and then a conveniently driving car drives over a conveniently placed water lake on the street and it conveniently makes Scrooge eat water. HAHA! Gladstone gets up and mocks him for that. So the hole saved him from being wet. Pardon my confusion; but how is getting wet WORSE than falling into DA...HOLE (God bless Baby Plucky!)? Wouldn't DA...HOLE cause more pain and suffering? I sometimes wonder if the best DTVA writers ever thought about this. And Gladstone found a dollar bill to boot which somehow makes the logic break sort of go away. Too bad in real life; he would need a lot of those dollar bills to pay for medical expenses. Scrooge shakes the water off not amused at all.
So we head into town some more near a diner and a shop (This is Al Khan's wet dream come true with all of those blank signs) as Gladstone is really treating Scrooge to breakfast. Scrooge is confused on this as Gladstone states in front of the diner that it's simple. See; Gladstone has a gold dollar sign clip which he shows from his suit because he won it in a raffle. Now who in their right mind would have a raffle for something that costs about $3000 at least? Those tickets have to be around $500 a pop. He needs to pay the rent as Scrooge calls him out for having no money. Gladstone proclaims that he doesn't even have a lead penny and Scrooge stops him with his case as he proclaims that he will pay the money before he causes more harm to himself. Now that is being generous there as they walk inside. Scrooge goes in without any selling from the matire'd (Frank Welker) who is a dogsperson with brown hair, a brown nose wearing a brown suit and red bow tie. He has his NOTE OF LIES in his hand as Scrooge is customer number 999,999; so if you cannot guess what happens to Gladstone Gander next; you have no business reading this rant. Damn; I'm good as the curtain gets pulled and it's like New Years in Times Square all over again.
The contest dogsperson gives him a paper which is the prize of free meals at their restaurant for one year. And it is for him and his friend too. Oh yeah; that isn't obvious in the very least; no siree. Scrooge is SHOCKED and APPALLED at all this of course as Scrooge and Gladstone are given a table by the matire'd and Gladstone proclaims that he lives on his luck see. Scrooge isn't amused because he doesn't. Fair enough I suppose; but man Gladstone seems smarter than he needs to be. Gladstone pours hot tea (or water; it's hard to tell) into the white/blue stripe tea cups as Scrooge explains that Magica Despell is in town and she wants to break into his vault. In town? I thought her mountain was PART of Duckberg? I don't get it. Gladstone pours his tea and something plops into it; which of course has a silver dollar in it which of course Disney Caption misses the “when they made the tea” part which would at least explain what they were pouring. Scrooge tells him to cut it out because he doesn't believe in luck as the waiter (dogsperson with black hair and nose; wearing mostly gray with a bit of red and some white) arrives with the food. Gladstone gleefully blows him off because Scrooge has his lucky McGruffin..ERR..I mean lucky dime. SCORE!! Scrooge has no counter to that one. We pan over to an old lady wearing a brown fur coat with gray hair and a golden earring powdering herself with the cosmetic mirror of doom and of course she has a sight problem too. She has that evil look on her kisser as Scrooge explains the traps at his money bin. She falls down from her chair (man; those chairs are defective) and she gets up again showing that the gray hair is a wig and that she is Magica Despell. I knew that evil look made it too obvious. Magica is not happy with these turn of events as this ruins her. I guess her magic spells have gone south this week.
So we cut back to the table as Gladstone as he makes an offer he cannot refuse: Sell the money clip in exchange for a peek of the dime. Scrooge takes the clip and does a scan on it and agrees to the deal. After all; it's a free sneak peak and a chance to make Gladstone look like the fool that he is in Scrooge's mind. One condition; don't tell anyone about the new traps. Gladstone calls this no problem. Too bad Magica heard everything anyway. We then cut to a far side shot of the back wall as Magica is hiding behind the wall as the old lady and looking quite sloppy in doing so. Magica proclaims that Mr. Lucky will solve her problems at last as she runs like a bad Scooby Doo episode out of the restaurant as some papers fly in the process and the doors close much to the surprise of the waiters. So we logically go to the high rise Hotel of Doom. We know this because it sezs Hotel in pink letter on the right side of the building. And Al Khan wept tears of sorrow. We zoom into the left side of the hotel as we cut to inside a suite as Magica the Old Lady goes through the wooden double doors and slams them shut.
Magica mocks Scrooge for thinking that he has outsmarted Magica Despell. Magica then does the yellow magic trick and changes back into her regular clothes which is pointless (and probably a BS&P decision) since we already saw that much of her wardrobe was removable without it. Although it does allow for her high heels to change from gray to black so it's not a complete write-off. Magica is going to have Gladstone betray Scrooge and then she will have the lucky McGruffin..ERRR...I mean dime. She then goes to her golden cheese bed and goes under it to reveal the red magic suitcase. She opens it and brings out her devil's stick as she proclaims that she will charm Gladstone and then the power and wealth will be hers see. And the devil stick is glowing so you know that it is SERIOUS BABEE! She goes towards an open window and has the evil laugh as she create a thundercloud in the process. Magica proclaims that it isn't bad for the first thing in the morning.
So we logically head to the money bin and zoom in towards the top of the roof as Gladstone proclaims that the dime must be the most powerful good luck charm in the entire world. We head into the hallway as Scrooge tells Gladstone not to invoke such hyperbole and then uses the cane on the neck of Gladstone to make him stop in front of the checkerboard floor. He then tells Gladstone to step where he steps. They step onto the black squares as Gladstone mocks this as child's play and Scrooge agrees as he throws a dime onto the white square and the big ass masher mashes the square and dime flatter than Alexander the Grape (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!). Of course the dime is already flat; so there isn't much squashing to do. The dime is now a plate as Gladstone swears in DUBBED ANIME STYLE (holy horseshoes) and calls this inflation. Sadly; the infamous inflation episode everyone in Ducktales fandom was not included in the DVD sets Disney released. Maybe because it hit too close to home like Flying Dupes; right guys?! They hop some more and make it to the light beams; the hallmark of cartoon security systems the world over. Scrooge touches the beam and the worse sounding alarm in history pierces through Gladstone's ears. Must be the Anti-Hoppo system I heard about in Smearinggun.com. AHHAHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH!
Ummm..Gladstone gets off the usual Star Trek reference that is so dated it's no longer funny. Scrooge pushes the red button on his remote control (which stops the beams I guess) and then throws his top hat into the hallway as we see about 5-6 robot arms with the BARREL HAMMERS OF DEATH crashing down onto the hallway floor. His top hat gets flatten of course as the traps stop and Scrooge and Gladstone advance. Gladstone tells Scrooge that he has nothing to worry about and Disney Captions again misses some of the dialog. Scrooge pops the hat and tells him that Magica is a tricky witch. I agree; I mean she could just use magic to disable the traps easily. They make it to the office and the vault door as Gladstone states that even if they get lucky they still would have to know the combination. But Magica is a tricky witch; she could use magic to blast down the vault door. See how easy it is to figure this out?! Scrooge doesn't take that into account because only he knows the combination. So we go into the vault with the morning light of doom shining on the lucky dime which is sitting on a pillar on glass. Isn't that just a little too obvious Scroogie? The lights get turned on as we instantly cut to Scrooge and Gladstone at the lucky dime. No logic break; I guess it's a weird editing job as Gladstone proclaims that his fortune is based on a lucky charm after all. He looks at the dime as Scrooge steals it back and blows him off. He did it the hard way see and Gladstone calls it soggy. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. He decides to continue with his luck as he throws the money clip to Scrooge and then walks out. Scrooge is not amused by this.
So we logically go outside BEFORE HAPPY HOUR (sunset) on a sidewalk near Gladstone's house (I think) as Gladstone is walking with about five presents in his hand cheering because he won three contests, a vacation to Ducko De Janeiro and new clothes to boot. Gladstone truly is the luckiest duck in the world. No wonder Scrooge cannot stand him. He never earned a living to save his ducky neck. Gladstone kicks the front door open and we head inside to his living room which is a pretty nice modest house. And then the black phone of doom rings right on cue. Gladstone throws the presents down and claims that he might get more good luck on the way. He answers the phone and the lady on the phone is from the Duckberg Broadcasting Company (Frank Welker as a female voice; that's a new one for me according to Chris Barat's notes. Unless Chris misplaced him with June Foray or Russi Taylor which makes more sense. And it's June Foray as the Grammi Gummi voice gives it away) and has won a chance to be on the million dollar quiz show called Truth or Crunch-equences. I guess this is Mick Foley's second gig in between his wrestling stints.
We then go into the hotel room and see Magica sitting in front of the bed flipping her wand asking Gladstone to see their talent coordinator for an interview. And he could be in the show tonight. Gladstone tells her to hold the rabbit's feet and he'll be right over. Magica uses her magic wand and the pink chair starts having a mind of it's mind as Magica tells him that they are at the Duckberg Palace Hotel suite 412. Of course that is probably where Magica Despell lives right now. And here's another problem: What guy would let Magica Despell have a room in 1987 when Wicca's were considered Junior Satanist by the bigots? Unless the guy was Wicca himself? The chair walks around the room as Gladstone proclaims that he never leaves home without his luck and Magica puts the phone down as he proclaims that the goose is in for the night of his life. Magica laughs and then takes a seat from the pink chair without her permission of course. So we cut back to the living room as Gladstone is HAPPY because this is a terrific million dollar game and walks out; remembering to takes the magically out of nowhere horseshoes that was hanging from the top of the door. Gladstone claims that he'll prove to Scrooge how lucky he really is. He slams the door and this logically leads us to...
….the hallway of the Duckberg Palace Hotel as Gladstone walks to the double doors of Suite 412 which of course is Magica Despell's room. Gladstone knocks on the door and they open by themselves as Gladstone slowly walks in as Magica nearly blows her cover and then recoils as Gladstone asks for the talent coordinator. We then pan over to a desk to see Magica with yellow hair, a green tank top and pink/black chip pants. She looks like a punk rocker who got rejected for the heel role in Jem! Gladstone foolishly goes to the desk to sign the paper as Magica blows her cover right there and then uses the zombie potion on Gladstone's head and he becomes Magica's willing slave. So much for luck there you dumb luck goose! You should have seen this coming a mile away. Gladstone is dumb founded even more so than usual as Magica turns back to her old self and blows off her voice acting skills because they hurt. As they say: No Pain; No Gaining Number One Dime, right Magica. AHHAHAHAHA! ZAP! OUCH! Ummm... Magica grabs onto his shoulders and proclaims that she'll use his luck to get past the nasty traps as Gladstone can barely respond. Magica tells Gladstone to follow him and the zombie luck magnet follows as we logically go to...
...a sky shot of the money bin AFTER HAPPY HOUR (After dark) as Gladstone and Magica stop in front of it. Magica tells Gladstone to hear what she tells him to hear and see what he tells him to see. Gladstone sells like a good little lucky zombie. Magica proclaims that Gladstone is now on Truth and Crunch-equences as the Money Bin entrance suddenly changes into a Christmas Light fest. Magica proclaims that there is a maze inside the door to follow which leads to door number one and she uses the Transformer magic sound to open the door. Gladstone tries to get in but Magica pulls on his orange suit to stop him because she has to introduce the host of the show which is Bill Barker; Bob Barker's rejected son from the Price Is Right (or Wrong depending on if you like or hate the womanizing freak.) as we see the game show like hallway and out comes Bill who is a dogsperson wearing a purple suit, white sash, brown pants and shoes and has brown hair and the world's tiniest mustache (Corey Burton by the way). Bill Barker howls at the moon which shows why he was rejected on the Price Is Right (or Wrong). The magical crowd pops on cue for that one which proves that it doesn't take much to amuse them. Magica then turns into a attractive female in a red dress, black cape and yellow hair; calling herself Vanna Black. Ah; I see Vanna White's aunt has a job. Vanna White would be a guest host for Wrestlemania IV during this time too I do believe; although it's difficult to tell the date of release here. Bill Barker (at the entrance which has a Christmas Lighted Arrow pointing left to state the obvious) proclaims that at the far end of the maze is the grand prize.
Vanna wants him to beat that maze as the chant goes on and Gladstone walks with the ZOMBIE WALK OF DOOM inside the Money Bin. Sadly; Gladstone bumps into the pillar near the pillar masher trap just to be a dick. Some laughter ensue as we get another shot of Bill as Gladstone apologizes for bumping into him. More chanting as Gladstone goes through and around the smashers easily. He makes it through as Gladstone takes a bow (after Vanna covers her eyes in horror) and Bill howls at the moon again asks if he is great. I am so loving this illusion game show. Vanna Black goes through the maze and apparently she was magically inside a hole which she climbed out of and then goes to Gladstone praises him and nearly blows her cover again; but recoils onto the next maze. That looked really odd for some reason. We make it to the beams as Vanna decides to let him cheat on this one as she uses the spell on him and Gladstone think he is in some limbo competition as he manages to do the most absurd limbo dance through the beams and manages to get to the other side without touching a single laser beam. How about that?! Vanna tells Gladstone to push the red button on the side wall and he does even though there was no evidence of such a button when Scrooge was demonstrating the traps to him. I believe that is the first logic break of the episode and we are over ten minutes into this thing. Vanna and Bill run in as Gladstone has completed phase two. Vanna talks to him about phase three as Gladstone takes out his horseshoe; kisses it (EWWWW!) and then throws it right into the control panel and destroys it which disables the BARREL SLEDGEHAMMERS OF PLOT! I just knew that object would get involved somehow.
We head to the vault as the crowd pops on cue as Gladstone asks what is next as Bill the voice in Gladstone's zombie mind as the vault door is now a double spinning wheel. And Bill howls at the moon of course. Gladstone has combination spinners in his eyes and he stammers to spin to win. So he goes over to the vault and spins the combination perfectly and opens the door. Wow..just wow. Gladstone and Vanna run into the vault as Gladstone grabs the dime on glass (as we have logic break #2 for the episode since the pillar is gone for some reason) and he cheers victory. Vanna then uses the spell and that turns Gladstone back to normal as he is confused as ever to where he is. Magica grabs the dime on glass and thanks him for stealing the McGruffin for her..ERRR...I mean dime for her. Gladstone realizes who it is and he is SHOCKED AND APPALLED (in that order) as Magica proclaims that she is Mrs. Despell. And since he used his luck unintentionally for wicked purposes; he is cursed with bad luck see. Cue evil laugh as she waves goodbye and teleports out with the dime. Gladstone does not like this one bit as he screams like a bad baby and that ends the segment nearly 12 minutes in.
After the commercial break; we head onto a sidewalk in the morning (huh?) as Gladstone walks on it refusing to believe that he has bad luck written all over him. Gladstone notices a dollar and grabs it near the fire hydrant as he claims to have the golden touch still. However; he then gets MURDERED by the umbrella as a bird furry in a gray coat and straw man calls him out as a thief and wants police help (June Foray). Gladstone runs away stage left and then trips over a conveniently placed sleeping dog and takes a really sick bump on his face. Now what owner would allow a dog to sleep on the sidewalk? The dog growls (Frank Welker; DUH!) as Gladstone asks him nicely to sit and of course the dog no sells. The dog pounces and that leads to the SCOOBY DOO CHASE SEQUENCE THE MAD DOG EDITION~! Did I just make a bad funnie in there or something?! He runs into the park and takes a sick bump with his neck into the tree tranch and does a loop-de-loop for only 15 cents and lands on top of the dog. HOLY CRAP! That's a move that can snap a neck like a chicken. That was downright nasty.
They ride horse for a while and then the dog throws Gladstone off him stage left and Gladstone takes a MAN-SIZED bump off-screen as the dog walks off stage right acting like a snob. We then cut near a sidewalk as Gladstone is all right without any injuries whatsoever. I'm still wondering how Gladstone got out of the Money Bin without Scrooge NOTICING?! He of course is near a puddle and if you cannot guess what happens to him next; you know what I mean...Damn; I'm good as Gladstone sobs like a little baby because he'll have to get a job like normal people. He then notices the restaurant and runs into the entrance all wet as he asks the matire'd about the free meal and the matire'd blows him off because he made an error in the counting and that Scrooge was the one millionth customer. D'OH! Gladstone is PISSED off because he is supposed to be the lucky one. At least he's smart enough not to call himself a thief in the process while slamming his hat down. He grabs onto the matire'd and the matire'd throws him out of the restaurant with a wussy bump onto the ground. Gladstone is not happy for all this as Gladstone decides to tell Scrooge what happened as he crawls away. So that logically leads us to...
….Scrooge's mansion inside his second office as Scrooge is at the desk checking his papers as his golden phones ring off the hook. Ah; I see Mr. Wimpleman is back from Cash As Catch Can Part Two which is strange considering the treatment he got from Scrooge. And apparently; the treatment caused him to change voice actors from Tony to Corey Burton this time around. Scrooge answers the phone and it's someone from the copper mine in Argentina (Frank Welker – okay this makes sense now) as he tells Scrooge to bring suba gear if he wants to stay in business as it's the copper miner who is up to his hips in water inside the mine calling him (dogsperson with black greasy hair and mining gear). Scrooge eats water for his problems from the phone (logic break #3 for the episode; but a funny one though) as he hangs up telling him to send water wings. Scrooge answers phone #2 and it's another voice (Frank Welker again) telling his of problem with his grain ships which has dumped oats all over Lake Michigander. And somehow; Open Office sees Michigander as a real word. IT'S A MIRACLE! Scrooge blows it off as Mr. Wimpleman shows him the printer paper results as the bottom is falling out of the market. It's a stock market crash. You cannot blame the absence the dime for that. It's because the companies were being too average for their own good.
And the stock chart red line drops down like a stone and into the wooden floor (logic break #4 for the episode; but also pretty funny). Scrooge cannot believe this is happening. Why don't you go to your Money Bin office instead Scroogie? Then you would see WHY things are getting rather goofy in your office right now. And then Gladstone's voice beckon as we cut to the entrance to see Gladstone walk in all wet. Gladstone proclaims that Scrooge is not going to like this and Scrooge promises not to get upset. That promise is broken in about 3 seconds as the entire roof gets raised on Scrooge's voice cue when he finds out that his dime is gone. And even the garage roof rises despite not being part of the building. How about that? I think Scrooge has surpassed Kit in the department of paranormal type stuff. Scrooge stomps on the table and cries like a little baby as usual. Of course Disney Captions screws up since Scrooge proclaims that his business has gone apart; not to pot. And of course it's all Magica's fault of course. Gladstone is in the chair proclaiming that she has his luck and Scrooge tells him that he needs to recover the dime he took from him. Gladstone sees the truth as Scrooge uses his cane to pull Gladstone away stage right.
So we logically go to Duckberg harbor as the seaplane of doom flies into the skies from the water as we get some map trailblazing on the map and then some cute stuff involving Gladstone and Scrooge butting heads and Scrooge ordering him to go somewhere else. So we logically go to Magica's mountain as Scrooge and Gladstone climb the rock sides of the mountain as Gladstone is worried about her spotting them and Scrooge blows him off because it won't do Magica any good. That kind of logic makes no sense to me since Magica has the advantage with the dime. They climb up with the rope bridge as we zoom out to her black cauldron which is certain to make sure Shawn Michaels runs away from seeing this episode as Magica has her staff on retainer just for these situations. And I see that Disney still allows the pentagram as we see some of it on the floor in the background.
Sadly; on the far shot; we see that Disney has indeed invoked the no pentagram stance as the pentagon is changed to a circle and it's similar to Sailor Moon's locket in later Sailor Moon shows. Magica calls this a good crackle as the black smoke of doom flies out of the mountains left eye (AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH; MOVIE RATING AND QUACK PACK EPISODES!) and appears behind Gladstone and Scrooge as Magica mocks them to no end. Scrooge demands his dime back while calling her a loudmouth cloud. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Magica challenges Scrooge to get past her traps with their bad luck as Scrooge blows it off. Sadly; Gladstone slips onto the side of the mountain complete with Hanna Barbera running sound effect and is in trouble as the dead weight is causing Scrooge to slip and struggle as Magica mocks Scrooge for that one. Scrooge isn't amused by it as Gladstone can only shrug while Scrooge pulls the rope up after getting his grip back. So we logically go to....
...the entrance to the cave as Scrooge pulls the rope and puts it away as Gladstone asks if this is the entrance and Scrooge thinks that it is. They walk inside as Gladstone does the old Fruedian Slip of Doom and trips onto a rock and takes another really good bump on his face. And all hell breaks loose as the cave caves in as Scrooge grabs Gladstone and bails stage left. Scrooge blows off Gladstone's lack of direction and sight. Gladstone of course isn't used to doing stuff without good luck as he asks if it was one of Magica's traps. Scrooge thinks it might; or that Gladstone is a trap upon himself and then walks away southwest. They walk for a while as Scrooge pretty much explains why she likes living here in one neat little package. Gladstone tries to respond; but Scrooge covers his mouth as we are at the fork in the cave. Apparently; Scrooge sees a rabbit's foot and Gladstone declares them lucky and he walks forward and then stops as we sees the most absurd, frightening creature in history: the DRAGON LEMPER OF DEATH~! HAHA! At least they are playing this up as comedy and not as horror; or Albert Walker would have a field day with this episode at the Agony Booth. Although; the next rant (Duck In The Iron Mask) has enough of such Agony Booth material to work with as well. Gladstone stutters and WA-HOO! Disney Caption finally allowed a babyface to stutter instead of stammering. This is a special day! And of course Gladstone calls him a nice bunny. If only Gladstone; if only. The dragon rabbit breathes fire as Gladstone screams and that ends the segment 16 and a half minutes in.
After the commercial break; we see Gladstone as he is close to gets BBQ; but Scrooge grabs him and it's the rolling ball spot stage left. Hmmmm; BBQ Goose...SLURP! POW! OUCH! Ummm... I think Gladstone's luck is coming back here. They go over the cliff and land near the river bed on their bellies. Scrooge pops up as the dragon rabbit hops towards them as Scrooge blows off the rabbit's Easter eggs. They would contain dragon scales; Scroogie. It's not that hard to figure out. Scrooge then orders Gladstone to get the lunchbox from his backpack to unleash the...wait for it...carrot sticks?! Oh; that is not contrived in the very least no siree. Who in their right mind; packages carrot sticks for a picnic?! Even Gladstone is not amused by this so you know it is lame. Gladstone goes to his backpack (which I'm sure Swiper swiped and Dora doesn't even know it) and the handle breaks from the red lunchbox and bounces into the river. HAHA!
Gladstone apologizes for that one and the goofy babyfaces are forced to jump away. Gladstone backs up and of course falls into the water which looked a wee bit too contrived for my liking. Nice dive though as we cut to Scrooge running away stage right from the Dragon Bunny. He makes it to the edge as he is fed up with this Agony Booth style stupidity and goes to his top hat and fills it with water. Scrooge runs back; jumps up three pillars and throws the water right into the open mouth of the bunny as it chokes in water fluid. The dragon bunny tries to invoke the flamethrower; but no dice on that one. Scrooge blows him off as he goes to Gladstone and pulls him out of the water. Geez; that dragon bunny was weak; at least he still had some decent claws to use. Scrooge and Gladstone run off as the dragon bunny just sits there wondering where it went oh so wrong. So we logically go to...
….Magica's central room as she is in the middle of the edited pentagram as the stars are in perfect configuration as the dime on glass is on the table with the wand and there is enough torches to light a city block. She shows the Wii Blue Amulet of Doom as the dime will be part of her. See; with Scrooge's number one dime, she can control all the dimes in the world and all dollars. In other words; she wants the same power Scrooge had before she stole it from Gladstone. She grabs the dime on glass as it's one dime to rule them all as we cue the evil laugh which Disney Captions misses completely. Sigh. One dime to bind them all; and the evil laugh is captured by Disney Captions. UGH! She's only doing her job as she breaks the fourth wall right in front of the camera.
So we return to the cave as they are at the fork of the road as they are close to the lair. Gladstone asks where to go next; and Scrooge asks where Gladstone thinks they should go. Gladstone picks left; Scrooge picks right. Gladstone truly is the Michael Pacther of all ducks in this show. Gladstone asks why and Scrooge throws a rock into the left side of the cave and the cave caves in of course. See; Michael P has NOTHING on this guy. Scrooge reminds him of his bad luck as they walk stage right to left as they are getting really close now. Scrooge of course proclaims that the traps are going to get a lot worse and he steps on the TRAP DOOR OF DEATH and they free fall through DA..HOLE and into the MIRRORS OF HELL. Good bumps on the fall though as Scrooge asks Gladstone if he's having any fun at his vision of a fun house. And of course the ceiling is falling down as Gladstone is wondering about lost brain cells.
Scrooge swears in DUBBED SCOTTISH STYLE (Kilt McTartan! Okay that one is new to me.) as Gladstone whines about being web-footed waffles. Hmmm; goose waffles...SLURP! POW! OUCH! Ummm... Scrooge orders Gladstone to give him the backpack to smash a mirror and Gladstone blows him off because it's seven years bad luck. I betcha Scrooge blows him off because he already has bad luck and it's not any worse than getting flatten like a squashed grape. I check the DVD....Damn; I'm good as Gladstone has the backpack and notices that the mirror with smoke is the one to smash. So Gladstone invokes the backpack on the mirror and there is nothing...AND THE ROCK SEZS NOTHING! Scrooge blows him off as a lugnut and charges and crashes right into the mirror with Gladstone close behind as the smasher manages to squash the floor; but not the goofs.
So we cut to near the broken mirror and some rock pieces (huh? I thought the ceiling was made of metal.) as the spotlight is on them and Magica is right there in the circle of triangles to blow him off for being so resourceful. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Scrooge orders Magica to drop the dime. Now considering that he black pot is right next to her; you would think that Scrooge would I don't know...Choose his words more carefully! Magica places the dime on glass over the black pot and Scrooge screams out no. See what happens when you don't choose your words carefully?! Magica pulls the dime away as she asks if she frightened him. She proclaims that he should be (and the evil laugh is not captured by Disney Captions again) as she proclaims that she'll be the richest woman on the planet.
Scrooge looks up and sees a hole in the roof which is showing the spotlight spot. Scrooge has evil intentions as he pulls out the golden dollar clip from his suit. Dammit; I knew that thing would be used in this episode somehow. Magica declares that Scrooge will be reduced to selling flowers on a street corner. I don't think we need to remind people the last time someone tried that spot since parent groups thought someone was selling illegal drugs in Mighty Mouse in the late 1980's. Funny how Donald Wildmon notices this from the creators old past (of using cocaine which he claims was hyper referenced in the 1987 edition of Mighty Mouse in one episode.) and failed to notice similar references in DTVA. Rescue Rangers, Song of The Night'N'Dale, is on the DVD, just saying Donald. You look like an idiot.
Anyhow; Scrooge uses the golden dollar clip on the light as he blows off Magica with a plant reference. The light nails Magica right in the eyes and she drops the dime on glass and it shatters as the lucky dime of doom sails away stage right as it goes into the crack of the floor. Magica is pissed off as Scrooge tells Gladstone to stand behind her. Gladstone sells with confusion as Magica is still blinded when Gladstone stands about six feet behind her. Magica growling with piss and vinegar as she grabs the wand and chants for the powers of darkness and invokes the tornado of doom to blow Scrooge into the wall. Because that is just what this episode needs: More windbags. Sadly; the tornado goes backwards into Magica as she pleads for it to stop; but since it's going after Gladstone (and his bad luck) it's no dice. HAHA! Scrooge simply used his bad luck against her. Magica gets caught and takes a MAN-SIZED bump right into the stone wall. HAHA! Magica questions the amount of spin on it; but Scrooge gleefully explains it all to her. And now Magica is PISSED as she is going to knock them into next Tuesday. Scrooge orders Gladstone to go find his dime as he sells and goes to the cracks on the floor as Magica delivers her next spell chant as she sends the rocks to cook their goose as three meteors go from the wand and hit various stone walls melting them and out comes some big boulders to crush the babyfaces. So we have gone from wind magic to earth magic. What's next; a big nasty water puddle? Actually; that would pay off the joke.
Three boulders come towards them as Scrooge orders Gladstone to hurry and Gladstone picks up the dime for real. They run towards each other as Scrooge wants the dime and Gladstone trips on the dime holder (Now that is thinking an episode through there laddies!) and the dime flies into the air and Scrooge grabs it. Sadly; he and Gladstone have a meeting of the minds. And it wasn't at the badly drawn pentagram circle. Oh wait....They drop to the ground as the boulders come in and smash into each other which would kill them in any other universe; but of course they have the dime and the boulders crush each other into pebbles and the goofs with attitude are all right...Damn; I'm good. Magica thinks it's over but Scrooge and Gladstone blow her off as they pop from the bottom of the rock pile. Magica gets on a second rock pile (logic break #5 for the episode) as she waves her magic wand again and tries to zap Gladstone; but the magic fizzles out as Gladstone yawns. Well; that pretty much buries Magica Despell as a threat now. It had to happen because you know Eisner's motto: Classic Disney Characters are being milked for big bucks and to hell with the original characters; even though they all came from the Donald Duck/Scrooge comic books. That officially makes Eisner more stupid about the source material than me.
Magica cannot believe this as her wand is useless and Gladstone and Scrooge walk out telling her to next luck next dime. Damn; stop with the stupid puns already Jymn. Magica throws the wand down and states that it's not fair. I agree; burying the awesome Russian Wicca heel, isn't fair to Wiccans' and people who like over characters. Shame on you writers! And Michael Eisner too! Don't forget to pump fist for feigned outrage on the way out too. She curses Scrooge and then falls backwards off the pile and it's an off-screen wussy bump once again. Curses on the animators for not making it MAN-SIZED. So we return to inside the vault as Scrooge shows the dime on glass again as the McGruffin...ERRR...I mean dime is safe once again. Gladstone proclaims that the luck has returned as the oat spill actually absorbed an oil spill (REALY?! Yeah right?!) and the government is paying him for. Gladstone and Scrooge walk up the ladder and out as the copper mine is made of mineral water which is much more than the copper. And the market is back up. Call me crazy; but that is really good luck if those things all happened at the same time.
I think Gladstone IS up to something there Scroogie. Scrooge blows it off and tells Gladstone that he should stop trusting in luck. After all; it was HIS luck that got the dime stolen in the first place, natch. They walk out of the money bin as Scrooge asks Gladstone to get a decent job as the wind pick up and blows something in Gladstone's face. Gladstone looks at it and it's a ticket for a one year world cruise. Scrooge groans on that one and decides to give up on Gladstone and brings out the golden clip as he asks for the cost of the four leaf clover. Gladstone hugs him and they walk down the sidewalk out of sight as Gladstone wants Scrooge to treat him to breakfast this time to end the episode at 21:09. Wow; this episode was near perfect until it started getting contrived with the finish that basically killed Magica's heat as a threat. A few logic break didn't help either. Great outing for Gladstone Gander though along with Magica before the finish of course. **** (80%).
THE REVIEW LINE
What a surprise? Another really good episode featuring Magica Despell. It's too bad that the good luck angle for Gladstone had to cause Magica to lose her heat as a monster heel when her magic fizzled out in the end; but it was really the only way the finish would have made sense. I came out really liking Gladstone Gander though; as he proved that luck does have it's good points. After all; he was the one who pointed out Scrooge's hypocrisy in trusting luck in a dime which ironically turned out to cause problems when it was in Magica's hands. And the irony still played out exactly as I expected it too; with Gladstone not learning anything other than proving that luck works out for him. The character development might have been paper thin; but it would have broke logic to have that character development because Scrooge was hardly a good teacher in not depending on luck for his fortune. Some of the logic breaks were silly; but at least Wang Films was on it's best behavior (which of course Disney Captions was not). It was a pretty fun ride and it ended up being a good episode overall. It certainly isn't awesome; but it was a guilty pleasure for me; just to see Scrooge's trust in that dime get thrown back in his face for criticizing Gladstone for depending on luck all the way. Next up is probably the oddest episode in the series: Duck In The Iron Mask. Not just for the episode itself; but the behind the scenes stuff which has to be one of those “backstage moments” kind of things. So...
Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you next time.
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