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Down And Out In Duckberg

Reviewed: 01/02/2010

You're SUCH a Weasel Man!

So we conclude the Ducktales DVD sets with probably one of the most powerful and probably one of the most depressing episodes of the series. Not so much that Scrooge and family go poor in such dramatic fashion; but the fact that today's world would have looked on Scrooge differently than I and Chris have when you compare to people who have never seen a episode; to ones that have seen Ducktales and know Scrooge McDuck for what he really is. So; let's rant on shall we...?!

This episode is written by Ken Koonce and David Wiemers. The script is consulted by Patsy Cameron and Tedd Anasti and story edited by Jymn Magon. Interesting note: This is supposed to be an adaption of a Carl Barks story; but there is no credit present for him in this one. Weird.

We begin this one in the streets of Duckburg as we see Scrooge's limo driving and stop near a suitor place (check the top hat and strange break in the window). Scrooge jumps out and enters the place as we see a dogsperson at the register wearing a green coat and brown pants with brown hair greeting Scrooge and offers him a buy two suits for the price of one (showing a green and blue suit). Scrooge states that he is not here to buy from Mr. O'Flannel which I believe was voiced by Philip L. Clarke who started on Devlin in 1974; then went straight to voice acting with Scooby & Scrappy Doo in 1979. He did appear in Cataclysm and the Man Who Saw Tomorrow as Nostradamus. He appeared on Pole Position, was Dead End in Transformers, and was the King in The Pebble & The Penguin movie; but little else in terms of notable roles; although he was an additional voice in several Disney Feature movies (Beauty & The Beast, The Little Mermaid, The Hunchback of Notre Dame and Aladdin). Ducktales was his only DTVA appearance. He now does mostly video game voices with several recent Doom games, Tenchu 2, Ground Control, Warriors of Might & Magic, The Bard's Tale and Agatha Christie: And Then There Were None as his most recent credit in 2005 as Judge Wargrave. Scrooge asks about how the business is going and he claims that business has been good. So Scrooge gives him a paper that informs him that rent has increased. Mr. O'Flannel proclaims that business hasn't been that good and Scrooge gives him free advice to not give away business suits for free and tips his top hat and walks out. I guess Scrooge owns the building.

So we go to a sky shot of Duckburg as the limo drives towards the docks and then we go inside the limo as Scrooge proclaims that he has one more business trip to go to before heading home. He also doesn't want to miss his favorite show. Duckworth then asks if it's...wait for it...Wrestling For Dollars?! HAHA! Ironically; they did pay off that joke until Launchpad got involved in the show in Days of Blunder on Darkwing Duck. Scrooge blows him off because he likes Lifestyles of the Filthy Rich. Duckworth looks forward to it. No; not really. Scrooge gives him that nasty look and then walks away as Duckworth blows him off behind his back. Apparently; Robin Lurch is so bad that being run down by a bus is a more interesting experience. Scrooge walks onto the docks as we get a far shot of Scrooge talking to Captain Jack who is a sailor with blue overalls and a pig fury (with a sailor's hat). Captain Jack I think is voiced by Steve Bulen who started in a television cameo The White Shadow. Now; all of these credits are based on the date they were released in Japan because Steve Bulen is like Sherry Lynn, David Lodge and Tony Pope in TaleSpin: Steve does English dubs for Japanese Animation; and many of them were released in Japan during this time; but were not released here until much later.

So we have Mobile Suit Gundam 2: Soldiers of Sorrow (Lt. Seki/General Elron), Fight! Iczer 1, Dirty Pair: Mystery of Norlanda, Vampire Hunter D, Fist of the North Star, Black Magic-66, Transformers as Searchlight, The Crying Freeman series, Giant Robo: The Animation, Zeiramu, 3X3 Eyes, Casshan: Robot Hunter, Crimson Wolf, Street Fighter II The Animated Movie (and the TV series: SFII: Victory), Trigun, Outlaw Star, Slayers, Black Heaven and Ghost In The Shell: Standalone Complex. That is an incomplete list as USIMDB usually isn't the place to get a complete view on English dubs for Japanese animation. Ducktales is his only DTVA appearance. His other credits include: The Little Mermaid movie, and video games like some Star Trek games, Might & Magic: World of Xeen, Quest For Glory V: Dragon Fire, Bushido Blade 2, and the most recent credit Codename Panzers Phase Two as James Barnes in 2005. Like Philip; I could be wrong of course since Chris has question marks for these two voices. Jack proclaims that business has not gone well as we look at his boat which has only one real hole; but Jack keeps claiming that it has more holes than fishing nets. He asks for money to fix the boat; and Scrooge offers to lend him some, but he wants security on the loan (which is fair in a sense – but they are supposed to be friends after all) and Captain Jack states that he only has the boat. Scrooge simply refuse after that because it's too risky as he puts the money in the wallet and walks away. Problem is; Captain Jack needs the money to fix the boat in the first place. Remember this for later.

So we go into Duckburg again as the limo rides the streets and then the limo jumps on the button and stops on a dime. We then see the fuel marker on E which means that the limo is out of gas. Scrooge doesn't want Duckworth to tell him that they are out of gas. So Duckworth asks what was his first clue as Scrooge jumps out of the limo again and tells Duckworth to find some gas on sale and that he will walk home. We go to the sidewalk near the F Bank between Duck Street and Drake Blvd (helpfully labeled on the stoplight sign as we see a female dogsperson with blond hair and in all green waving a bell asking for money for the poor and to help feed the poor. Oh my goodness; it's the Salvation Army lady (Joan Gerber)!! How fitting that one of the first minor characters Scrooge blew off in the very first episode I ranted on; is here on the final episode that I am ranting on. Scrooge comes in and he offers $10 and Mary thinks it is generous; but what Scrooge really wants is change for a $1,000 bill. HAHA! Mary of course doesn't have $1000 on her and Scrooge tips his hat and proclaims maybe next time. Scrooge walks out as Mary just looks flabbergasted. Don't worry; she would get her revenge on Scrooge later on.

So we head to the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) and zoom in as we go to the living room to see Scrooge on the far shot sitting in his green chair with the nephews sitting on the floor; along with Mrs. Beakly and Webby on a sofa watching television from 50 feet away. We hear the man on the television proclaim that this concludes another installment of the Lifestyles of the Filthy Rich and next week is a profile on Scrooge himself as we see a dogperson who dresses in red with gray pants and black shoes with a clipboard and curly hair with the RL letters on his tie. I believe that is Robin Lurch (Rob Paulsen) and he claims Scrooge lives by his own Golden Rule. He who has the gold makes the rules. Or in 2010: The console who entertains the most people makes the rules of the game. Also known as Wii and DS. It's goodbye as the entire family is happy to see Scrooge get on television. Scrooge proclaims that it is about time since when it comes to being rich; he is the filthiest. Scrooge wonders if that came out right as he catches himself...and then here comes the nastiest brown weasel with a black umbrella and green suit with tie; and black hat out of the closet! Okay Scrooge; what have you been hiding and why does this make you look like a heel. He's complaining about his chair and crushed velvet. Get used to it in this episode; you are going to really HATE this guy. As you are supposed to even though many today would be CHEERING this weasel. Trust me; you will be saying:

Roddy Piper's quote on Bobby Heenan: You are such a weasel, man!

He then gets the heel levels up as he pushes Scrooge out of the place and nearly makes him crush the nephews in the process. See quote above. Scrooge demands answers to this outrage and trust me this guy makes me like Rebecca Cunningham a lot more already. He is Fritter O'Way who is voiced by Aron Kincaid (according to the USIMDB; so take that one with a grain of salt) who started on the television show This Is The Life in 1952; then Fall of Nineveh (which he wrote, directed and produced along with acted in it!), and as a beekeeper in The Wasp Woman. He went on to do mostly movies such as Spartacus, The Girls On The Beach, Ski Party, Beach Ball, Dr. Goldfoot & The Bikini Machine, The Ghost In The Invisible Bikini, The Secret Sharer, The Happiest Millionaire, and the New Wife. He didn't land much in terms of roles on television until he got into animation as The Iron Sheik in Rock'N'Wrestling in 1985. He then became Sky Lynx in Transformers and Killer Croc in Batman: The Animated Series. Ducktales was his only DTVA appearance. His most recent credit was the Zeta Project cameo in 2002; along with Star Wars: Jedi Knights II – Jedi Outcast which was a video game as Reborn 3. He then shows the DEED OF DEATH as according to the contract; he owns the place. He then shows the model of a ship in a bottle called the Golden Goose.

So we head to the flashback as we go to the docks as we see the Golden Goose as Fritter explains that it's owned and sailed by his ancestor. We then see cargo being put into the hull as we see a duck with white shin guard and a sailor uniform which Fritter address as Seafoam McDuck. See Seafoam was charged with making a delivery for his ancestor Diddle O'Way (who happens to be like Fritter; only with a mustache and wearing brown and green striped pants). He is carrying a barrel that isn't so funny. Diddle (Aron Kincaid again through Fritter's narration) asks how much will it be to deliver the barrel of marbles to the Cape of No Hope. Seafoam proclaims that it's two schilling; or be gone. Diddle agrees; but he wants insurance so he gives him a paper and Seafoam signs it which is clearly the deed and then proclaims that they leave with the tide. However; we head to sea and it's stormy and the sails are tattered now. The ship sank and the marbles with it; but everyone was able to make it to the rowboats safely back to shore. So we head back to the docks as we see Seafoam explain to Diddle on the docks about the storm; but there are no excuses and according to the fine print; he now owns everything. Seafoam states that everything he owned went to sea; except for the golden pocket watch. Diddle wants that; but Seafoam runs away with it stage left. Diddle tries to get it; but gets MURDERED by the net filled with cargo and falls into the sea. I guess he died or something.

The flashback is over; but the real nightmare starts as Scrooge asks what does this have to do with him. Fritter is in his chair now stating that as Seafoam Duck's only living relative; he's responsible for the debt and wants the golden pocket watch. Problem is; Scrooge sold the pocket watch to get his fortune to the Klondike. Problem is; Once Upon A Dime has no mention of that at all and neither does Back To The Klondike. Logic break #1 for the episode; although it might be in a Barks story. Fritter calls it Diddle's watch (even though Seafoam earned the watch in the first place. See quote above); as Scrooge realizes that he is over a barrel and screwed. Mrs. Beakly gets all fussy about being fired; but Fritter agrees to let them stay as long as they work for him. Again; see quote above.

So we head to the top of the stairs as Scrooge walks down with a suitcase and then notices Duckworth painting the walls orange in a painters outfit. Scrooge asks why Duckworth has gone color blind and Duckworth claims that it's O'Way's redecorating plan. Scrooge then panics and sees Mrs. Beakly blowing up inflatable furniture that Scrooge mistakes for weather balloons. HAHA! This is truly the ultimate symbolism of Fritter's sex life isn't it? Fritter wants a new look see as Scrooge asks what will happen to his old furniture and then he hears some wood chipping noises and panics as he goes outside and sees a dogperson in white with a yellow hat taking the furniture and uses the wood chipper to turn them into firewood. Scrooge wants him fired; but he cannot fire anyone since Fritter owns the place and thus the workers OUT OF NOWHERE (why can't the wood chipper speak for himself?) state the obvious and tell him to get lost. So we head inside the book room (which is white now) and we see Fritter O'Way throwing out paintings, clocks, candlesticks, vases, anything he doesn't like basically. Again; see quote above. And he's doing such a kick ass job in his role too. Scrooge states that they are antiques and Fritter claims that it's useless to be rich if you cannot buy new stuff and he laughs exactly like a weasel. At least he's got the heel beat down conception of DTVA down pat.

Fritter asks about the luggage Scrooge is carrying and claims that it's his own clothes. Fritter takes even that and throws them down the chute. He IS such a weasel man! And then the doorbell rings as they go to the kitchen side of the house to open the door and there is a pig furry in a UPS uniform that looks like Captain Jack. And judging by that look; it probably IS Captain Jack. Scrooge looks outside and sees the Statue of Liberty in his own backyard. HA! And of course Duckworth is painting it orange while using a ladder. Just O'Way's order sir as Duckworth would say. What a freakin weasel this Fritter O'Way fellow is. And it is only going to get worse. As Scrooge turns around and sees that Fritter has turned the mansion into a Winter Solstice house 365 days a year. Scrooge accuses him of turning the mansion into a circus. Nowadays; seeing a house with Christmas lights 365 days a year is actually normal, so Fritter DID start a trend. Scrooge calls this lunacy. He's about 50% right; the furniture is bad for his reputation and I mean Fritters. For Scrooge; it's a lifesaver. Of course Fritter reminds him like a Bart Simpson bigot who knows that the bill of rights is going to protect him no matter how sickening it gets; that he owns everything Scrooge earned himself. Fritter orders him off the property and Scrooge leaves on cue. And then all the babyface quit on the spot as Mrs. Beakly throws down his apron and Duckworth folds up his neatly. Fritter doesn't respond which is weird because I thought he would get in some parting shots on Scrooge.

So we head to the gates near the Money Bin as Fritter has sent trucks to get rid of the fortune as the Money Bin is only about a ¼ way from being empty. Webby wonders what Scrooge can do and Scrooge decides that he will get a job and he is not afraid of hard work. He rolls up his sleeves and walks out as we head to Mr. O'Flannel as he laughs his ass off over Scrooge needing a job. Scrooge pleads for one; and Mr. O'Flannel actually states that he would honestly give him a job, but since Scrooge raised his rent; he cannot even afford to give him one now. Scrooge leaves sulking as we head to the Bakery (helpfully labeled as such with red letters) as the nephews smell good treats with Webby; but Scrooge checks his pockets and there is nothing to get. Scrooge then realizes that he has a standing account at Quack Maison. They wouldn't turn him away. So we go to the scene changer of doom as we head to Quack Maison AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) as we have all the babyfaces go inside the eating place as a pink waiter in the usual French Waiter outfit with the usual French accent (Chuck McCann) noticing Scrooge and gives them their usual table. Webby asks if the waiter is going to with them too. HEE HEE! So we head to the table as the babyfaces all eat at the table like a bunch of pigs. I think the pig waiter would be taken aback by his class compared to theirs. HAHA! Louie wants some dessert and Scrooge calls for the garcon to bring the dessert trolley...AND here comes Fritter to ruin a perfectly good dinner like the weasel that he is. He wants them out of his private booth as Scrooge states that it was his for years.

Of course Fritter pulls out the deed to remind him that he owns everything; including the account. UH OH! The pig waiter returns with the check on a platter and asks which account to charge and Scrooge points to Fritter's account. The waiter no sells that one as he asks for cash or charge. And so the babyfaces decide to charge right out of the building stage left. HA! It of course fails as the waiter somehow gains sonic speed; and grabs everyone in two paws. Of course they have to tend to the kitchen and the dishes to pay off the debt. Well; Scrooge found the job that he was looking for. Sadly; it doesn't last long as we see the babyfaces (which I will be retiring for a while when this rant is over) are at the candy store as Mrs. Beakly wants to find shelter since it is getting dark. The nephews suggest that they stay at Launchpad's or Gyro's. Scrooge refuses on that. The nephews wonder why since he's friends with them. Scrooge claims that they were friends when he was rich; but now that he is poor, he'll get treated like he treated them as such which Duckworth gleefully states in this quote:

Duckworth: You mean like a greedy slumlord going for the tenant's last nickel?!
Scrooge: Yes.
Duckworth: Like an overstuffed vulture snatching the last morsel of food from a starving mouse?!
Scrooge: Well...yes.
Duckworth: Like a bloodthirsty.....
Scrooge: All right Duckworth; we get the point!

Duckworth; you certainly have a way with words. Scrooge usually blows you off on the first question. Scrooge then proclaims that he knows a place to stay as we cut to the bridge and it's snowing. Oh boy; now the episode is REALLY going to be depressing now. As in; From Here To Machinery depressing (although that depression was literal and on a massive scale compared to this one which I think would be even more depressing if Scrooge was middle class. It is certainly depressing for the kids as now they are feeling Kit's pain.) as they cross the bridge while the nephews complain about the cold. We then see the new home which is downright depressing as everyone's clothes have started to become old and torn (even Webby's ribbon is patched up with blue) as Duckworth proclaims that they are ever so humble as the snow falls on a complete slum with cardboard boxes which ends the segment 11 minutes in. And this my friends is WHY a lot of people hate the new Disney. The new Disney would NEVER show this side of harsh reality. The saddest thing about it is that a lot people today would probably say to Scrooge: It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy. It may be false to Chris and me; but perception becomes reality and reality doesn't always like facts. That's probably why Kit Cloudkicker gets a lot more sympathy because he not only wasn't rich; he was also daring and lived through it for many years, alone without as much as a moral compass from someone else. Still; with kids around, it makes me have sympathy for Scrooge on the level that there are children involved.

After the commercial break; we see the Christmas light mansion and then pan over to Robin Lurch on the microphone as he profiles Scrooge McDuck who used to live the life of the filthy rich and now lives his life in the filthy ditch. And this just rubs salt into the wound for the family as we go to the news scene changer and see Webby and Mrs. Beakly under the bridge cooking a coffee cup over a small fire. Robin goes over and seeing Webby warming herself to a fire is just depressing to watch. Mrs. Beakly's acting is amazing when she talks about the cream of wheat when Robin interviews her. Robin then goes over the bridge (which has little water, natch) as he goes over to Duckworth near the cardboard boxes. No wonder new Disney wanted to get away from this; this hits way too close to home. Duckworth gives Robin a tour of the cardboard boxes and it just keeps getting more and more upsetting by the second. I'm amazed Duckworth hasn't lost a step in speaking as he shows a bedroom cardboard box. Robin asks what style is the decorating: French provincial, Rococo and Duckworth sums it up in one word: broke. Robin thinks it's Baroque, but Duckworth insists that it's definitely broke. We walk some more to near a hill as the nephews (covered in color coded blankets) as Robin is impressed by their resourcefulness on earning money. I wonder if he would be impressed on how Kit lived through this. That would be a story that would probably require at least five episodes by himself. The nephews aren't recycling; they are using the newspapers to burn to keep warm as Robin has that expression that is so damn priceless; I almost did a Pepsi spit take on it alone.

So Robin wants an interview with Scrooge himself. And then we notice Scrooge near the left side of the bridge in probably the most depressing moment yet: Fighting a Warner Brothers minor character over a bone. Robin proclaims that the mighty have fallen and this gives meaning to the term filthy rich. And then we get a really nasty scene with the filthy rich sound echoing and then everyone is laughing at him (except for his family) and then we see him wake up from a newspaper on his lap as it was a nasty nightmare come to life. We see them under a bridge in winter as Scrooge sits up and proclaims that poverty is the pits (Kit: Indeed!). And then Scrooge goes absolutely insane and runs out as Mrs. Beakly asks what is he doing. Oh lord; we are now approaching rock bottom for Scrooge McDuck in this episode as we go back to the Salvation Mary AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) still ringing the bell and doing the job to feed the poor. We then pan to the left of the street as we see some bums standing on the street and Scrooge absolutely goes nuts on them pleading for help. This is what I call a nervous breakdown and he would be in the hospital. The bums no sell and then we come to absolute rock bottom as Scrooge runs in and kneels down pleading for help and mercy in front of the Salvation Mary! Scrooge goes for the pot and Mary whacks him with the bell and Scrooge runs away with nothing as Mary wants the police.

The family follows as we head to the mansion as Scrooge grabs onto the gates and tries to open them acting absolutely insane. The family pulls him off and they take some MAN-SIZED bumps off-screen. Scrooge whines about being poor as Louie realizes that if Seafoam Duck had delivered those marbles; then this episode would have never existed. Dewey then realizes that they could get the fortune back if they delivered the marbles to Fritter. Scrooge blows it off as impossible since the Golden Goose sank a hundred years ago. And Duckworth really lets him have it as he blows Scrooge off for losing his character. Now if he told BS&P off like that; my life would be complete. Scrooge realizes that he did it one; and he can get his fortune back again. He then blows off Fritter at the gate and then walks away as he must hurry before Fritter completely destroys what is left of his fortune. And then we get the scene changer as it is morning and the family is dragging Scrooge towards the docks. HAHA! See Scrooge doesn't want to ask for Captain Jack's help because he didn't help him earlier. Captain Jack asks how he can serve them and Huey jumps up and wants a boat. Scrooge tells Captain Jack to forget that they asked and Captain Jack notices Scrooge and without a second thought he gets on the boat and offers it no questions asked. Scrooge is SHOCKED of all this after not helping him with repairs earlier. Captain Jack believes in his version of the Golden Rule: Do onto others as you want them to do onto you. Of course; the DX Golden Rule is: Do onto others that you think that is funny. Scrooge of course confuses it with gold; and Louie corrects him on that one. Everyone gets on board and Jack calls for the gangplank to be lifted as the nephews lift up the gangplank and we sail away from the docks.

So we sail for a while as the nephews plug the holes of Captain Jack's ship. Captain Jack then proclaims that the Cape of No Hope is dead ahead (death reference #1 for the episode) as we goes over to the family as Scrooge is sitting down with brown scuba gear on. Captain Jack shows a chart as he explains that the current should have swept the wreckage here. Scrooge puts on the helmet and shuts the glass cover which whacks Scrooge's beak natch. Scrooge then waddles on the boat and goes overboard as Duckworth mans the long pipe which gives Scrooge oxygen. He also tells Scrooge to say hello to Duck Cousteau should he bump into him. Scrooge walks towards Webby; but the line is too short and Webby tells him good luck and Scrooge goes flying back into the about 40 feet and then comes down and splashes into the water about forty feet away. Well; we need a cartoon spot after the depressing episode we have been shooting for thus far. We go underwater as Scrooge falls under and onto the ground (as we have a water shot of the babyfaces on the boat) as Scrooge sees an auto junkyard for ships. HA! They do call it the Cape of No Hope after all. Scrooge walks slowly to the right as we go topside to see shark fins (two of them) coming towards the boats on the left side. Dewey runs into the boathouse to the radio and yells for Scrooge. Scrooge wants answers to all the jabbering as we cut back to Scrooge on ocean floor level as he is running out of line and then he notices about two sharks circling him. Scrooge uses the cane to counter on the shark's heads and they bail. Scrooge blows him off for picking someone their own size...and then here comes a shark right from behind as Scrooge turns around just as the shark opens his jaw to cut the lines to end the segment 16 and a half minutes in. Just five and a half more minutes to go....

After the commercial break; we see Scrooge running away stage left and the shark misses the lines by a mile. Slowness of water really does work to the air breathers advantage after all. That leads to the SCOOBY DOO CHASE SEQUENCE THE SHARK EDITION as Scrooge orders for more line on the FPS shot. Scrooge falls down an abyss and the shark chomps the air line and radio line completely. Louie yells for Scrooge and gets no response from the boat; so Huey orders Duckworth to pull the line up. Duckworth uses the levers (WRONG LEVERS!) to pull the crane up; but they notice the line is cut and they all think Scrooge is shark bait; or drowned now. Scrooge drops down into the Golden Goose (check the hull; I'm not fooled guys!) Scrooge grabs the broken line (proclaiming that he is losing his air as fast as his fortune) and puts a knot into to slow down the leak. He grabs his cane and flashlight and then realizes that he's in the Golden Goose hull. He then notices a barrel with a golden symbol on it and opens it to reveal the marbles. Scrooge swears in DUBBED SCOTTISH STYLE and grabs them as the sharks circle the ship outside to prevent from getting outside. Scrooge pops outside as a shark sneaks in from behind him; but Scrooge turns around and uses the cane to counter. Scrooge complains about their one track minds as he gasps for air now (good attention to detail there guys) as we head back to the boat as the nephews proclaims that they need to save Scrooge.

And then Mrs. Beakly PULLS OFF THE SHOES and SLEEVES (and somehow got her apron back patched up) as she is going to dive in and save her. See; she was the Duckburg High swimming champion. I cannot take that one seriously even if I tried. And the fact that she cannot tell which date she won pretty much shows that she has Rebecca Cunningham insanity in her veins as Captain Jacks pleads with her not to do it because the waters are shark infested. Mrs. Beakly blows him off and jumps off the crane (which causes the boat to sway ½ way) and jumps into the water. We then see the shark chasing Scrooge underwater again so Scrooge does the wedge cane spot on the shark's mouth to force it away. We then see Mrs. Beakly swimming down as Scrooge pleads for more air. So Mrs. Beakly puts air into his suit and Scrooge turns into a formally rich rubber balloon. He loses the marbles (How fitting?!) as he flies into the air above the water as the rest of the babyfaces gasps in horror. Scrooge gets about 50 feet into the air and then the balloon bursts and he drops like a stone into the water and sinks to the ocean floor below. Well; that was a pointless spot; but I'll live. So Scrooge pumps air into the green barrel (coloring mistake by TMS) as it floats into the air and both adults rise to the surface.

Scrooge asks for a lifesaver and he gets bopped with one by Duckworth of course. Scrooge grabs it and he and Mrs. Beakly are carried over the boat safe. The nephews take the barrel and open it and play with the marbles. Scrooge is thankful and wants to get back to Duckburg; but Captain Jack has another problem on his hands; the boat is leaking badly as there are buckets of water on the ship now. Scrooge blows him off for not fixing the boat and then the eye contact violence forces Scrooge to catch himself and apologize. Duckworth just casually throws the water overboard like the butler that he is. Then Jack points to the west as there is a hurricane brewing. The thunder claps and we got stormy seas as the water is now so bad that it's going through the window into the radio room nearly drowning Scrooge and Jack in the wheelhouse. Jack proclaims that the boat cannot hold much longer and orders Scrooge to radio for help.

So we head inside the living room of the mansion as Fritter is sitting down with his inflatable furniture and inflatable radio (I guess) as he is throwing darts at a picture of Scrooge McDuck. He is such a weasel man as the radio announcer (Chuck McCann I'm guessing) announces a news flash that former zillionaire Scrooge McDuck is feared lost at sea somewhere off the Cape of No Hope. Fritter O'Way loves that and sezs good riddance. And then he gets the LIGHTBULB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY and gasps in horror. See; Diddle forgot to put delivery date on the marbles which means that as long as they are delivered to Fritter; Fritter loses everything. D'OH! Like most weasels (and Bobby Heenan); they aren't perfectly smart. Fritter now has to make sure he DIES at sea as he drives the darts into his inflatable sofa (which is patched up which indicates that he's a lousy dart thrower to boot) and the sofa goes flying like a balloon loses air. HAHA! I see he has the pratfall problems Diddle had as he drops on his ass with a wussy bump (like the weasel that he is) and the darts land perfectly on the left side of Fritter.

So we go to the scene changer as the winds have died down a little bit; but the rains have now picked up. Captain Jack sees a ship coming and thinks that they are saved. Louie calls it the funniest boat he has ever seen as Scrooge realizes that Fritter has painted his yacht orange and yellow. Like I said; he is such a weasel man. Captain Jack doesn't care because they will be saved as he waves the red hanky. However; Fritter takes out Scrooge's blunderbuss and fires it at the hull. Now THAT'S THE ULTIMATE WEASEL MAN! Scrooge blows off Jack's ship of Swiss cheese. Jack gets out from the wheelhouse and yells to abandon cheese ....ERR...he means ship. And the woman and children go first; while old and marbles go second. Jack doesn't mind as we get a shot of Jack's boat sinking as somehow the rowboat is on top of the ship. All the babyfaces are on there as the rain has died down and some of the wind as Fritter laughs his ass off and states that Scrooge got what was coming. Now THAT is weasel projection man. And then he makes the fatal mistakes all heels do: Gloat far too long as a giant wave engulfs the front of the boot and Fritter gets swept away into the ocean as he pleads for help since he CANNOT swim. HAHA! Should have bought swimming lessons with that fortune eh Fritter O'Way.

Fritter swims towards the boat and Scrooge gives him the marbles; but Fritter refuses them and throws them back to Scrooge. See; if he accepts the marbles; he loses everything. Scrooge decides that for once; having someone dead is a good thing for a change and tells him that it's a long swim to Duckburg. Fritter gets swamped by another wave as the rowboat is about to leave stage left. Fritter then changes his mind and swims towards the rowboat. However; Scrooge isn't ready to pull him up yet as he shows him the delivery papers. He wants Fritter to sign the deal so it's legit. Fritter has no choice but to sign because he loses either way. Scrooge swears in DUBBED SCOTTISH STYLE (McHallelujah!) as his fortune is back and the nightmare is officially over at the 21 minute mark. Fritter climbs up as Scrooge proclaims that they will go back to Duckburg in his yacht now.

So we go to the final sequence as we see the opening title to the Lifestyles of The Filthy Rich as this week we go to a sky shot of the limo as Robin is riding in the backseat with Scrooge and he gets the rare opportunity to interview him and see how he spends his megabucks. Robin asks if they are going somewhere where the rich eat food as rich as he. Scrooge states that he isn't as we head to the Salvation Mary (who has moved her place thanks to the incident with Scrooge earlier) as he wants to feed the poor. Mary notices him as Scrooge shows a thousand dollar bill and she tells Scrooge that she cannot make change for a thousand; but Scrooge puts it into the pot and tells her to keep it. Scrooge leaves stage right as Mary thanks him for the donation. Great booking decision there as we go to the scene changer to the docks as Captain Jack is tending to Scrooge's yacht that has been re-painted to his usual colors. The limo stops on the left pan shot as Scrooge comes out and gives Captain Jack the deed to his yacht. See; nothing makes him happier than helping a friend.

They shake hands as Scrooge now lives by the real Golden Rule. Of course when Launchpad and Gyro are around; sometimes the Golden Rule can be dangerous. Both ways. So we get a zoom out shot of the television as everyone (including Salvation Mary drinking tea and even Mr. O'Flannel and Captain Jack) as Dewey wonder if he has forgiven him. Scrooge has and he even gave him a job as Mr. O'Flannel asks what that job is. So we cut to Fritter on a ladder outside scraping the orange paint off the mansion while wearing a half white shirt and green overalls. He still gets to keep the hat though. HAHA! Scrooge pops from the window and tells him that he's doing a good. Fritter proclaims that if he scrapes any more paint; he'll lose his marbles. Well; that is the punishment for being such a weasel. Even more so than Scrooge EVER was. We then go to the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM far shot zoom out (for the last time) as there is still a few more walls to scrape for Fritter to end the episode, disc two, volume one and all of Ducktales until the Youtube rants at 21:13. A few mistake aside; this was TaleSpin-equse in emotion and depression. No wonder some claim TaleSpin as a Ducktales wannabe; even though TaleSpin took these moments and put them to another level. **** ¾ (95%).


Well; we end Ducktales on a really high note which was both awesome and depressing at the same time. With the exception of a few logic breaks and some coloring mistakes; this episode was perfect in both performance and execution from everyone involved. It is also historic to me because it sets up a pretty interesting picture of what Kit might have suffered before he became an Air Pirate. It's also in hindsight the kind of episode where some during 1987 would have seen Scrooge as I and Chris do in Scrooge as the adventurer who made his fortune based on it. That it wasn't greed; but keeping emotions in cheek. Notice how emotional and insane Scrooge gets when he tries to rob the Salvation Mary and you will see what I mean. That was the rock bottom point for Scrooge. Sadly; the children would cheer Scrooge back then because he was the babyface and Fritter was a weasel like heel (who played it to the hilt until the end). However; in 2009 as adult; I think they would see Scrooge as the heel who got what he deserved for his ancestor (sins of the father infection and all that) cheating on a deal to deliver his marbles.

Sadly; Diddle wasn't very smart and didn't put a date to deliver them in the contract which would have made Scrooge a total heel who deserved it. And Fritter would be the babyface in making sure that a deal was a deal. The slum sequence was absolutely depressing to watch and Fritter's debacle with the mansion was just as nasty. It is fitting that it ended by Fritter being such a weasel that he forgot that he was in a windstorm and got swept away which forced Fritter to make a choice: Refuse the marbles and die thus losing the fortune; or accept and lose the fortune and still have a life. Head I win; Tails you lose. For a weasel to use a final insult by using Scrooge's blunderbuss showed how generous Scrooge really is when he merely gave him a job instead of throwing him in jail for murder of him, Captain Jack, two servants and four kids. The ending was also fitting as well as the booking decisions were correct. I guess Scrooge bought a new yacht too.

So that ends Ducktales until the Youtube rants and I have been really proud to complete these. Plus; after watching the 76 episodes I ranted on; I can say that Ducktales might be the most constant series since TaleSpin (I haven't seen Gargoyles and Kim Possible in their full bloom; so that might change); as there were only a few real clunkers in the first season overall and the rest happened when Time Is Money came into play which indicates that had they stopped at 65; it might have been even more constant than TaleSpin even was. While I consider TaleSpin to be the better series; I walked away liking all the main characters (except maybe Baggy and Bouncer; and maybe Bubba.) and a decent number of one shotters (although I could live without seeing Filler Brushbill ever again). And as I expected: Ducktales has better animation than TaleSpin; at least when it needs to move like a cartoon. I think part of the reason why TaleSpin's style is like it was (pretty stiff); was because Sun Woo and Wang Films were animating and both studios have been notorious for crappy stuff. Less so than Kennedy; but still.

Strangely; the least favorite major character of mine was Webby, but not because of her per se; but because she got all the crappy plot lines which shows that the writers were still trying to come up with a character that could go beyond the child/animal plot line. Then came Molly Cunningham; and it was good to go. The best characters was Launchpad and Magica Despell because Launchpad was the real Launchpad I knew and loved; and he lived up to it. Magica Despell is awesome as a heel; but the Wiccan connection might turn some people off since she is considered a legit Wicca (pentagrams and all). Flint was average to very good, Scrooge same thing. Mrs. Beakly wasn't nearly as fussy as I thought she was. The only time when it became overbearing was Send In The Clones; so she has suffered the same problem Rebecca Cunningham did at first only she didn't have the grace of breaking a stereotype like Rebecca would. Duckworth was average; although his dick attitude in Take Me Out Of The Ball Game nearly laid him low. Big Time and Burger were great (Burger was a riot with the voice and feed me attitude.); but Bouncer and Baggy didn't have much juice with me. Bugle/Bebop was good much to my surprise, along with Babyface and even Bankjob. Ma Beagle was excellent as well.

Gyro Gearloose is a dark horse character and he deserved a lot better than the Gadget Man plot line which showed in Sir Gyro De Gearloose. I mean it was the best Ducktales episode ever and he got pissed away afterward. As for the nephews: Huey was awesome, Dewey was all right and Louie was good. I still say that they are the same character with a different gimmick; and their dependence of the Junior Woodchuck Guidebook was overbearing at times. Doofus was actually the best child of the lot; but he deserves a better actor than Brian Cummings gave him. The worst character was Bubba because he was tiresome and Tootsie was a one joke at best. Fenton was great in SD; but I don't know how well he is beyond Super Ducktales. Same with Gandra Dee and Mrs. Crackshell: Okay; but SD isn't enough to get a read. The McQuack family was the best one shotters as babyfaces and Millionaire Vanderbucks and Goldie were tied was the best one shot tweeners while Fritter O'Way takes the nod as the best heel. Worst babyface one shotter goes to Filler of course; worst heel goes to Filler. He was bad in both directions. Although Farridig comes awfully close.

So the final episode ratio after 76 episodes: For this disc set we have six thumbs up and three in the middle. For Volume One we have 13 thumbs up, 13 thumbs in the middle, and one thumbs down. After 76 episodes: 35 thumbs up, 35 thumbs in the middle and six thumbs down. This is actually a better quality episode ratio than Gummi Bears which had four thumbs down in just 47 episodes. So my last article for Ducktales will be the Ducktales Volume One DVD review (and if I can find the box; I'll do Volume 2. Don't hold your breath though.) which will be on Sunday. And then it's off to prep work for The 20 Years of Spin Re-Rants. The show that I loved the most in DTVA: TaleSpin. So....

Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you in five months time with I Only Have Ice For You.


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