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Darkly Dawns The Duck Part Two
Gosalyn may have Spirit; but she's also got TB and it burns! HA! I KILL ME!
That caption might be the first naughty pun that I managed to work into my rants. Don't worry; you won't be seeing that much, unless you are a sexually deprived loser of course. This is part two of the pilot which I predict will be a lame version of Plunder and Lightning Part four before it's all said and done. Time to rant...
The entire pilot is written and story edited by Tad Stones. Walt Disney Animation Japan is animating this episode; however, unless I really know who's doing what episode from now on, I'll just refer to them as the animators when they screw up a spot. That should be a lot since I'm not a huge fan of Darkwing Duck from the subjective side of things.
Followup Moment #1 (Yes; it's recycled, but it still needs to be addressed twice since I added some more thoughts to the note.): Remember an innocent time when instead of seeing Disney characters pants falling down, Dave being scared of a simple mouse, Penny Proud drinking Oscar Proud's milk and thinking that she is cool, Whiskers smelling his feet and ultra hyper moments like Fang destroying an innocent flower; we see Darkwing Duck being nailed by the ROLLING PIN OF DOOM, Darkwing playing air guitar and Gosalyn running into a room and bouncing on Drake's poor midsection (and then Drake grabbing onto Gosalyn's beak for revenge)? Don't forget the use of actual bombs and it was all shown with actual good music and good singers who can tell a story without sounding so contrived. Call me cynical if you like; but some things just wouldn't be possible without the FCC. You have been warned. Oh; and nice POWER OF THE PUNCH on yourself there Drake.
Interesting Moment #1: Guess what? No preview from the previous episode in this one! Then why bother giving three of them to TaleSpin if the 6-12 year olds can remember what happened in the previous episode? Maybe Dan Green was right after all. Maybe Home is Where The Heart is was too emotional for small children to handle because those three previous preview episodes would equal one minute and thirty seconds worth of content which should be enough if they were cut out. In fact; if they had cut the scene where Kit sees the BLIMP which didn't appear in the movie, then they would have enough time to show the actual scene since it's about 90 seconds in length. Sorry folks; the whole cut for time thing that Jymn Magon said is pretty bogus if you asked me. Then again; maybe that's what Disney wants us to believe. This is a condemnation of Disney and not to Darkwing Duck as a whole it should be noted because kudos to Tad for not insulting the audience's intelligence on this one.
We continue on as a sunset approaches in the CITY OF SAINT CANARD as the dreaded Darkwing Duck voiceover is back just to haunt me. Darkwing uses a sock metaphor to compare criminal which would have been funny if he was a cross dresser. Oh wait; I guess being a Zorro dead ringer is good enough to make Drake a cross dresser. And of course we return to Darkwing's hideout where we see various bad shadows of him before he calls whomever he was call to hopeless because no one gets the drop on him. So of course, Gosalyn Waddlemeyer gets the drop on him in a pretty funny moment. It was all due to the fact that Gos is wearing Darkwing's goofy hat. It looks better on her by the way. Gosalyn mocks him because his narration is worse than anything written on Saturday Morning Cartoons which is ironic since Darkwing Duck was on ABC every Saturday during it's run. Darkwing then ponders his next move while doing some goldbricking (Bret Hart anyone?) and then gets the jump on Gosalyn and hangs her upside down. Sadly; Darkwing doesn't tie her up so Gos can do Kit's bite Don on the butt spot which Disney NEVER showed; I guess. He calls her a terror too which Gosalyn responds by tickling him and man; Darkwing Duck is an absolute pussy on that spot. Geez; I hope he's good to her if that's his big weakness.
Gosalyn also pounces on Darkwing which isn't as cool as seeing Molly bop Kit on the nose. She's trying; I'll give her that, but Drake is hardly the one to get any humor out of me. Gosalyn walks to the table where the egg timer is sitting and I'm going to call it that we are going to get those silly spots involving breakfast once again...and of course; Gosalyn nails the egg timer thinking that it is a radio. Too funny as Darkwing is forced to REDO the spots. You know the ones. Gosalyn gets Keen Gear #3 of the pilot. Gos even wears OVEN MITTS to show just how stupid Darkwing Duck is. She also outclasses him in the spots too I might add. Gosalyn swears in DUBBED ANIME STYLE (darn) as she forgets the milk. You can guess what happens next and it's not as funny as the first one. Gosalyn is concerned; but Darkwing Duck is all right because it is COMEDY baby! Now Gosalyn is ticked off because Darkwing doesn't wear a helmet when he goes on the motorcycle.
I have a feeling that there is an episode commencing on this little batch of character development. However; that will have to wait as Gosalyn and Darkwing get into a conference (with Gos winning of course DUH!) as she hops into the motorcycle scolding him about seat-belts. She must have watched TaleSpin; there's no other explanation. If so; kudos to the Head Mistress for having some good taste for a change. She could have had her watch Teamo Stupidito and then I don't know what kind of mental state she would be in. That's an accident waiting to happen too you know. Darkwing gets Gos off the motorcycle while making up lame excuses as to why he cares more about his image rather than his safety while petting her hair just to annoy me. I guess she's joining Kit in the pet shop; right Gidget?! Gosalyn continues the pointless questioning and Darkwing goes into his promo which doesn't sound cool here because he sounds like Dracula at a pussy bar. HA! I made a funny. Gosalyn tries to get him to take off the mask and Darkwing Duck doesn't sell while he walks away. Gosalyn accepts defeat. Huh? What about your spirit Gos?
We now go to Darkwing Duck's bedroom where Gosalyn is allowed to sleep in his bed. Ewwww! Isn't this just a sexual predator criminal charge to happen Drake? Anyhow; Darkwing tries to get Gos' shoes off and he flies around taking wussy bumps like he usually does at this point. He also goes over TB's plan in case for the three or four people who didn't tune in last week didn't know about it. Drake wants to know what the Ramrod is and Gosalyn confuses him with talking that even Kit Cloudkicker couldn't do. Sadly; she doesn't understand what she is saying and therefore is one step below Kit in that department. At least Kit knows what he is talking about. Gosalyn also states that her grandfather never told her any code. Or she's doing Kit's tough guy act. Darkwing Duck keeps his cool and talks about how much spirit Gosalyn has. Gosalyn thinks Darkwing Duck gets it and kisses him on the cheek to show that he gets it. Darkwing tucks her into bed and tries to sneak away; but Gosalyn's voice beckons. She cannot sleep. Considering all that noise Drake made during the sneaking, I cannot really blame her for it. Drake is upset; so he looks for the dreaded sleeping hammer of death. Oh come on Drake! She's only ten years old for crying out loud. Did you read those stupid How To books that were only for humor (except for the Hitman one which spurs a lawsuit and change the face of entertainment forever) and Gosalyn suggests a lullaby. Darkwing Duck doesn't know lullabies so he wants Gosalyn to do it.
Gosalyn teases the tough guy act; but then decides to sell and sing...and man this lullaby is awesome! Not P&L awesome where the song was an actual plot device for Kit to change his mind about adults; but it's still awesome nevertheless. She even clear her throat before the song which is a nice touch. Darkwing decides to pick it up from there and he does a pretty good job here. Sadly; it's only a lullaby and has little meaning other than putting Gosalyn to sleep. And like all good songs; it violates DUB ANIME CONDUCT RULE #12 (Thou shalt not rhyme; because it's COOL!) Gosalyn is asleep and Drake nods off because the song is also good at putting the singer to sleep. Thankfully; Gos' snoring wakes up Drake. Funny stuff assumes as Gos is still asleep. Drake then looks at the picture and notices something odd about the Ramrod in the picture with the Professor and Gosalyn. Nice to see that the animators have some CONTINUITY in that the grape jelly stain is still there. Anyway; I take back what I said about the song meaning nothing. The lullaby's color sequence is the sequence to disarm the Ramrod! Now that's an awesome way to keep something a secret. Darkwing is concerned as a green light outside commences which forces Darkwing to the window as he sees storm clouds approaching. That is a symbolic sign that evil and sorrow is about to commence; ala TaleSpin the year before this.
Of course; the green light is being used by the Iron Bullcrud as TB is using it to flush out Gosalyn. Geez Taraus? Use your guns; they work a lot better. They don't have to HIT Darkwing; just get his attention. Clovis acts like see doesn't care as usual. See; TB is entering the MIMI JOKE ZONE himself as he is using the green light to signal Morse Code for surrendering to Darkwing Duck. Tantalus (the vulture; not the OZ DS game company) will pinpoint the location of his hideout while Hammerhead, Hoof and Mouth (God, I hate that duo's name!) go for the girl. I guess TB gets Darkwing Duck for himself. Which is fine because Taraus is more threatening than Hammerhead ever was. Hammerhead is concerned because Darkwing might not know Morse Code while Tantalus flies down towards the bridge. TB believes that Darkwing has the Boy Scouts Handbook under his pillow....And just as he said that; that's exactly what Drake finds under his pillow.
Where does TB get his sources from anyway; or is he just winging it as it goes along?! Anyhow; the green light wake up Gosalyn (I've been there Gosalyn; light just ruins my sleep patterns.) just as Drake figures out the code. However; he sees this as victory as his image gets the best of him again. A Bad Reflection On You Part One..and I sense we're getting to the same end that Baloo suffered in that episode. Gosalyn doesn't buy it and as well she shouldn't but Darkwing Duck doesn't listen to reason (What a shock?!). Gosalyn is egging on him and really that is not a good idea since Darkwing doesn't like egg on his face both literally and symbolically as he blows off Gosalyn. I always like it when the overzealous hero gets antsy and then screws himself in the end. Always fun to make bad jokes about. Darkwing Duck storms out after a Grade-D badmouth on Gosalyn and goes to his motorcycle and puts the helmet on. Good for you Drake. Darkwing Duck starts the bike and leaves the tower on the bridge and heads east while Tantatlus spots him. Of course; he doesn't go after him which is sad in one sense because he was more than a match for Drake, but right because his role is to find Gosalyn. Tantatlus heads there as TB calls the bridge Audobon Bay Bridge. I don't get the joke here so let's move on. He calls for Hammerhead, Hoof and Mouth to strike there and get Gosalyn...Just don't let her have an accident if you know what I mean. TB decides to go after Drake; and his laugh still sucks as always.
We go to a towering building because nothing says SUPERHERO like a tall building. Ask Spiderman about it...and almost instantly the dreaded VOICEOVER OF DOOM strikes at 10:03:
Darkwing: I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am the jailer that throws away the key! I am.....REALLY STUPID!
That one is much better and as you'll see; this one has irony written all over it...and he even gets the dreaded smoke cloud upon his entrance (AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH!)....Sadly there is nothing..AND THE ROCK SEZS NOTHING! AGAIN! Darkwing's timing is absolutely lousy; but it does give away some good laughs in the process. Darkwing then sits on the edge of the building which turns out to be a stupid move because Taraus Bullba appears OUT OF NOWHERE behind him. Well; Darkwing does feel really stupid; so it's quite understandable to be really stupid at this point. Darkwing tries to turn around and he is caught since TB is three times Darkwing's size.
Nice to see him try the Baloo diet for once. Oh come on; you know that joke was coming. Drake tries to cut his promo and it sounds even funnier now that TB is actually going to kick his butt now. I love it when someone's arrogance which he could NEVER back up in a million years is thrown back in his face. TB is loving this and so am I. TB states that his ego is out of control. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Darkwing then decides to play stupid and tries attacking TB. However; TB grabs him and squashes him like a grape (literally) in an ultra funny spot. TB isn't interested because the police have made it to the top of the tower. It's due to the previous train robbery which wasn't forgotten. At least Tad hasn't committed any logic breaks in this episode...Yet. TB leaves while Darkwing's ego continue to deflate before our eyes. I believe this is where Darkwing Duck is to be arrested and the segment to end and of course he does get arrested as the police grab him and pin Drake down while TB escapes back to the Iron Bullcrud to get Gosalyn. Drake screams out Gosalyn to end the segment about 12 minutes in.
After the commercial break; we head back to the bridge as Hammerhead, Hoof and Mouth climb up the bridge. Huh? Why not climb down with the Iron Bullcrud? It seems very capable to me. Man; there's Logic Break #1 for the episode and things were going so well for Tad too. We quickly head to Gosalyn looking out the window musing about Grandpa as usual and now she's doubting the power of spirit like most people who have had their dreams crushed. Then the ugliness begins as Hammerhead appears in the window and Gosalyn is forced to flee. I suspect that Gosalyn will be fighting so hard that she will be caught by TB in the end just to show how useless his goons are. Hammerhead threatens her so she uses MOLLY VIOLENCE ( and a good one too! Thank you animators!) and Hammerhead bounces backwards selling like he's been kicked by Molly. Excellent! Hoof and Mouth go after her and it's time for the BREAKFAST SPOT OF DOOM since she rings the egg timer and the most contrived spot in the episode begins once again. Okay Tad; it's a breakfast spot, I get it. Move on to something else.
Needless to say; Mouth gets hung by the NINJA FORKS~ and almost gets killed by the plates. Man; that spot gets more violent as it goes on. Hammerhead enters as Gosalyn is now holding the cereal machine gun. Ten dollars says that spot was cut by Disney censors during it's Disney Channel run...and it was such an awesome spot too. It shoots with bee sound effects as Hammerhead and Hoof are forced under the table like most underhanded illegal deals are. Hammerhead uses the table as a shield and Gosalyn runs out of ammo; so she's in trouble. Until the cannon shows up shooting grapefruit and they do the cute Don Karnage take the fruit in the face spot which is still funny to see. The trapdoor opens (NOT THAT SPOT AGAIN!) and they take flames to their cans so to speak. Hey; Molly took a pen to her can, so seeing Hammerhead taking a flamethrower in the ass isn't out of the forbidden stuff that Disney shows have...and it ends with the MAN-SIZED bump caused by the springing fridge. Sadly; we don't get to see them looking funny as Tantalus decides to end the fun and appear from the window and grabs Gosalyn. Gosalyn struggles more than Kit does (good for her- gives her spirit some much needed heat) and TB arrives as Gosalyn insults him and states that Darkwing is going to crunch him like a corn chip. I guess a junk food metaphor works well here since this is a more modern show. TB shows off his sucky laugh again. Please Gosalyn? Mock his laugh! That'll really give you some babyface pops because it sucks! He also calls Darkwing Duck another jailbird and is way out of his league.
..And just as he sezs that; Darkwing Duck is in jail sitting on the bed feeling sorry for himself because his ego got in the way. Now let's see how long it takes before he snaps out of it. It took Baloo almost 15 minutes to snap out of his funk and he needed THE MIRACLE WORKER to help him. Sadly; a pig jailbird is with him (don't care about his voice since he has little to say) and I would suggest that in any world outside Disney; Drake would be raped right about now. I'm not saying that I like to see any Disney character raped or rape used as a prison plot device (to be honest; I hate it), but it would happen. Thank God this is COMEDY BABY!! So; of course Drake gets on top of him and degrades himself while pinning down the bigger stronger guy. Geez; if he had done that to TB earlier; TB would actually be in trouble! Logic Break #2 for the episode and thankfully Launchpad comes to the rescue with Drake's motorcycle. Drake snaps out of his funk in about thirty seconds as he thanks Launchpad and hops into the passenger side of the motorcycle.
They leave jail (which is a big no-no of course) as Darkwing wonders how they are going to get up there. Launchpad has the answer and it's the big surprise that Launchpad was saving for DW BEFORE DW stopped having the ego trip. We head back to the hanger where the Thunder Quack makes it's debut. Geez; it looks NOTHING like Drake at all and yet Drake's ego is still not deprogrammed completely. Sigh...The art of lapsing back into character. Too bad it's not as natural as TaleSpin was. Launchpad is his biggest fan after all which appears really unhealthy for some reason. At least Tad maintains CONTINUITY which is great because this two part pilot has nine Logic Breaks compared to just three for TaleSpin (in the entire 90 minute movie I might add.). Of course; this is COMEDY and therefore logic breaks are more forgiving. Darkwing love these odds and calls Launchpad a sidekick which causes the Thunder Quack to go into a tailspin (BWHAHAHAHA!) Sadly; Darkwing doesn't respond as we return to the Iron Bullcrud as TB discusses future plans to mount the Ramrod and he decides to mount it on Canard Tower. Clovis no sells it as she is more calm and unemotional than Greg Skywinds on a spree to find his brother. Of course; we see Gosalyn tied up in the chair as TB plans to do some really bad things to her. Tickle her feet perhaps. It worked on Kit so well; and we know Gosalyn is game to sell. Maybe those two could have a contest to see who lasts before they confess. I know that RJ Williams would beat Christine in a sell the tickle laugh contest easily so that's pretty much a forgone conclusion.
Sadly; the ALARM OF PAIN commences before TB can even do that (BOO HISS!) and TB has to forget the torture method because the Thunder Quack has arrived. TB is appalled that his attempt to torture Gosalyn will have to wait, so he orders the Iron Bullcrud to open fire. And it does; firing the slowest machine guns that I have ever seen. The Thunderquack dodges those easily and Darkwing want to open the Iron Bullcrud up. Launchpad calls this dangerous and Darkwing Duck gets his next catchphrase in: Let's Get Dangerous! Which is codeword for MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN. Well; at least he's got the cool catchphrase; but this episode is starting to fall apart. So the Thunder Quack shoots a rocket into it's brown eye (NOT THAT ONE!) as Launchpad gets off a lame catchphrase which should have been left to Drake since he's got the ego for it.
Drake uses the motorcycle to get in and lands safely. And yes; he wears the helmet in case you care. I know I should invoke my previous work at Safe Communities; but the joke is dead as a two penny nail as Hammerhead said as he charges out of jail. Geez; that's ironic as Darkwing Duck calls him Hammerhead Hannigan which makes the Head Mistress in the orphanage even dumber now. Darkwing shows off some lame karate moves and simply trips up Hammerhead who does the bend the pipe spot with his face. That was just there. He then threatens violence with the gas gun as he points it as Hoof and Mouth and demands Gosalyn. TB appears (DUH!), acts all calm (DUH!), produces a tied up Gosalyn (DUH!) which causes Darkwing to be SHOCKED which allows the goons to cock their guns at him (DUH!) and Darkwing Duck surrenders (DUH!) to end the segment 16 minutes in. Yeap; this episode is falling apart now. TB should have just tickled Gosalyn and got it over with because the method of torment in the next segment is really lame.
After the commercial break; we see the Iron Bullcrud over Canard Tower as the Ramrod is on top of the tower. Gosalyn feels bad about Drake's situation as she is untied now. WHAT THE HECK? WHY? Gosalyn is the biggest threat out there and you untied her TB? Logic Break #3 and the first one I don't accept. Darkwing responds that he didn't have a life to live before she showed up and Gosalyn hugs him. Okay; that was pretty cute; but the episode is going to go downhill. TB calls is so touching and decides that Gosalyn will not be tortured because she's got too much spirit. WHAT?! Kit had as much spirit as Gosalyn does and he was tickled into submission. Gosalyn is a Disney character. Disney characters cannot stand being tickled. I know that TB wants to be manly; but come on! Tickling is free heat; costs you nothing and it ticks off the fanboys. Ask Kit fanboys about it. So instead of tormenting her; he uses Tantalus to grab Gosalyn and she's now over the edge. Oh great! Since this is a COMEDY act; it's going to trivialize Kit's free fall from Plunder and Lightning part four. Come on TB; you're better than this. Kooshmeister claims you are. Just pluck a feather from Tantalus, tickle Gosalyn and force Darkwing Duck to give you the codes.
Drake refuse and TB calls himself a gambling man (something even TaleSpin characters never spoke of) so he orders Tantalus to cause Gosalyn to free fall and she does. TB is losing all the heel heat that he had and the episode is dying before my very eyes. Darkwing of course surrenders to this and we have a delay before Tantalus grabs Gosalyn once again. Sadly; he doesn't get TB's heat back. TB is just a lame version of Don Karnage now. Kit's free fall meant something because Don wanted to kill him. That was dramatic. This was for COMEDY and it was lame comedy. Gosalyn really has second thoughts as TB threatens Drake again with Gosalyn's death and Darkwing goes over to the Ramrod and enters the code without further incident. He also demands that Gosalyn be put down. That was more disturbing than I had intended as TB wants to do a test.
He picks the Federal Gold Repository (which then the subtitles for this episode simply do not show up. UGH!) and fires at it. So what does the Ramrod BEAM OF DOOM do? It picks up the building, breaks it open and it sucks the gold into the Iron Bullcrud. Okay; that was pretty creative. TB only wanted to rob banks with it so it is within context; but it's not as cool as Don Karnage destroying stuff with it. That would have got back all of TB's heat. Clovis does the no sell again as TB's crappy laugh returns as he climbs down. Please; just end the episode now. Of course; TB fails on his promise (DUH!) as Tantalus drops Gosalyn again (after taking a long time flying up.). Darkwing calls TB a butcher since murderer isn't allowed anymore (Thank you Rebecca Cunningham for nothing!) as Darkwing kicks TB in the midsection and bops him in the head. TB even sells the move! This is getting really annoying now. Of course Launchpad arrives and dives to save Gosalyn and does without any animation showing Gosalyn's fall. Smooth move guys. Gosalyn likes the save from Launchpad as Hammerhead and TB look for Darkwing Duck. That should be their fatal mistake commencing as the VOICEOVER OF DOOM beckons at 19:01:
Darkwing: I am the terror that flaps in the night! (Hammerhead starts shooting at the SMOKE OF DOOM (AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH) getting it up to 0.2 Trigun for the episode) I am the chill that runs up your spine.
I guess so since TB unstoppable monster image and heel heat has been whizzed away by the writers. Darkwing is on the Ramrod controls and TB orders Hammerhead not to shoot. WHY? I say shoot him dead and take your chance. You're supposed to be a gambling man TB! Logic Break #4 for the episode and of course Darkwing overloads the thing by pressing too many buttons. Hey; it ALWAYS works in the movies, right? The Ramrod overloads and shoots laser at everything and missing at the same time. Correction; it hit Hoof and Mouth so they float up into the air. Hammerhead follows them after making contact with the floating beam. Gosalyn and Launchpad are loving this so they go after Tantalus in the Thunder Quack (Gosalyn is inside now). Okay; this is just plain mean now...and it plucks Tantalus' feathers. Would have worked better if they went with my suggestion of tickling Gosalyn first. Otherwise; it is pointless and it's just out of character for Launchpad.
It's enough to cause Tantalus to dive into a tailspin (BWHAHAHAHA!) and he's probably dead. Clovis continues to flip switches and she's the only one who hasn't screwed herself in this episode. The Iron Bullcrud gets nailed (with Clovis inside) and it explodes and falls into the harbor of Saint Canard. Clovis ejects out and is her no-selling self. I guess she becomes Sandy No-Sell Sweetcheeks now. More Ramrod shooting as we are nearing 1.5 Trigun if the Ramrod was a bullet shooting gun and Darkwing decides to escape now. However; TB grabs him and states that he'll simply die which is death reference number one of this episode and eight in the pilot. TB holds on to Drake and basically commits suicide as the Ramrod explodes quickly. Gosalyn cannot believe this and her acting is pretty sub-par. I'm seen better out of the nephews from Ducktales even if their bawling was annoying as heck. The top of the tower is destroyed of course and that is it for TB's plans.
We get to see a crane over the Canard Tower in a nice bit of consequence CONTINUITY from the animators. Hey; they were on in this episode as we head back to the orphanage (just as the subtitles return from the dead. Nice quality control there Disney) as the ultra-dumb Head Mistress tries to cheer up Gosalyn while still sounding like she doesn't care. She deserves to be fired from her job like the mocking warden. They are that dumb. I expect them to marry soon and contribute to the gene pool since it's a free country in Saint Canard...and Gosalyn is sick of the word spirit now because it got Drake killed....The head mistress leave and talks to a certain Drake Mallard who ends up having the Darkwing Duck voice. Yeah; Drake Mallard is his real name and Gosalyn feeling great because her spirit didn't MURDER him. Gosalyn goes to the desk and sees Drake Mallard in regular street clothes which actually make him manly wearing bandages to sell the injuries from last night. This proves that the head mistress is dumber than dirt. It's not a logic break; I find it funny in it's own unique way.
He always forget the milk and has incidents with breakfast. Gosalyn is HAPPY so she bowls him over intentionally and thanks him for not dying on her. Drake nearly blows his cover like most Disney characters do when they become another character. The head mistress' last name is Miss Canvaugh which is a play on Gosalyn's voice talent. She gets suspicious about his driving skills and of course Drake screws her by having Launchpad crash into the building. Good for him; this orphanage deserves it. It's a regular car since the motorcycle would blow his cover...and Launchpad still has trouble with the gearshift. Gosalyn and Darkwing just sigh and laugh as Miss Canvaugh looks SHOCKED at the hole Launchpad makes as the opening theme song plays. Now that's something the pilot to TaleSpin should have done to make it so epic. We head to Darkwing Duck's name (againest a white background) and Darkwing Duck himself in a lame pose with a puff of smoke (AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH to end the episode at 21:14 . Oh man; this was getting into a groove until the ugly climax; but it did redeem itself somewhat at the end. *** 1/2( 70%)
THE REVIEW LINE
Well; I finished the pilot and it was a real solid outing. However; any good grace that I had with Taraus Bullba died 17 minutes in when he started becoming so lame that he became a weak version of Don Karnage who didn't have the guts to torment a little girl. It might have made Gosalyn stronger; but Gosalyn was already a strong babyface and even a tickling would have help tone down her character a bit. Instead it simply drop Gosalyn and threaten her with death as a comedy act. No drama and no buildup. Plus; the scene with Launchpad and Gosalyn attacking Tantalus made no sense since Tantalus didn't deserve to be plucked. Just another comedy scene that didn't catch. Then there was the logic breaks which included untying Gosalyn which was really stupid on Taraus Bullba's part. The three minutes of the Ramrod was creative; but I wish TB used the Ramrod to destroy things. Don Karnage got to do that and it got him over as a heel who could kill anything; but his goons screwed him. TB is now a third rate heel who happen to sell Darkwing's shots when he was no-selling earlier when Darkwing's ego was present. I can forgive Darkwing for snapping out so quickly since the show was running short on time; but TB's selling was not forgivable.
Still; the episode did have a lot of good spots and the animators got the animation on which was a huge problem in the first two parts of Plunder and Lightning. Gosalyn was awesome as I expected and I hope she doesn't get buried like Kit was later on in several episode rants that I did. I must say this though; if this is the loose plotting that we are going to get now; then I fear for the remaining episodes which are very thin on plot and somewhat thin on laughs as well. The next episode is Beauty And The Beet which I believe is the first episode involving Bushroot which I thought was a funny character. A male version of Poison Ivy. However; I haven't seen Darkwing enough so...Thumbs in the middle for this episode and I'll see you all next time.
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