Return to 50 Webs


Disclaimer#1: All images, characters and material is (C) 1990/1991 Walt Disney Company and is being used without permission. The webmaster has made sure that no money was made in the creation of this web page and that all material used here is used with the up most affection and respect to the Walt Disney Company and the Tale Spin Team.


Disclaimer#2: The views expressed here are solely the views of the webmaster and no one else. The webmaster has no intentions to change anyone's minds about a particular subject and respects the views of the viewers. Comments about this and other editorial can be E-Mail at gweagle@eastlink.ca or signing the Cloudkicker guest book.


Dirty Money

Reviewed: 03/30/2007

I wonder who Dave The Barbarian would cheer for here?!


All right folks; this episode should end the debate on why Disney fans hate Dave THE CLEANING BARBARIAN of LAUGHS and why Dave fans don't understand our pain. TucsonCoyote talks about hating characters who clean; so why does he? I think I have an answer for that and it's in this rant. This is also the official debut of SHUSH which includes a tweener who might actually give me some big time laughs... or maybe not....Well here we go; it's time to rant.....

The episode is written by John Behnke, Rob Humphrey and Jim Peterson. I mixed with John, not up with Jim and Rob since Rob did episodes for Brandy & Mr. Whiskers and Jim did Baby Looney Tunes as well. The story is edited by Tad Stones which is his first episode story editing since the pilot...and for the second time in the last three episode rants; Russ Mooney is the producer of this episode. Also; this is the second episode I have seen that has Hanho Heung-Up Co. Ltd. As the lone animation studio. The first one was It Came From Beneath The SeaDuck; which is my favorite episode ever next to Plunder and Lightning. It's the one written by Don Rosa and has Kit Cloudkicker babysitting. Well; this is the longest opening phrase I have done so let's go now; knowing Drake's ego and all that....


We start this episode in a bank as a robbery has apparently taken place because we are in a BANK! Anyhow; we see J. Gander Hooter (voiced by Danny Mann) and Vladimir Goudenov Grizzilikof (voiced by Ronald Feinberg) of SHUSH wondering around waiting for DARKWING....DUCK! Now let me get this out of the way first: I don't get why the character designer chose the name J. Gander Hooter. I mean; if this is supposed to be a parody of SHIELD which SHUSH is supposed to be; then wouldn't Dick Slurpie be better? OH COME ON! You knew that naughty pun was coming! J. Gander Hooter sounds like a cross reference between a vacuum cleaner company and the dirty Hooters restaurant...and of course we have a Russian stereotype bear who speaks with a Russian accent. The reason why the Thembrians were funny was because they didn't act like stereotypical Russians nor Nazis. Most of the spots weren't stereotypical either (I could name only two or three that were Russian stereotypes).

Here it is made perfectly clear that Vlad is a Russian Bear and therefore a heel which he actually is not. He's a tweener actually. So Vlad better do some good spots to amuse me or he's going to look like a dated cultural reference that belonged in TaleSpin's 1940's setting rather than this 1990's setting. Vlad of course hates Drake because he doesn't go by the book and therefore is a disgrace to SHUSH. I have to agree with Vlad on this one since Drake is known to bury people with his EGO TRIP MODE. Considering that SHUSH needed Drake in the previous episode that I ranted; they are pretty much buried already as a non-factor...and just to make Vlad even more legit, the dreaded VOICEOVER OF DOOM beckons about thirty seconds in which is a new record for his ego....

Darkwing: I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am the combination lock on the vaults of justice...

YOU...WISH....DRAKE! The smoke cloud beckons AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH as Drake and Launchpad appear. I should note that this is the second episode that I have ranted without Gosalyn in it (the first was Beauty & The Beet). Coughing ensues from Drake which he gives the STARE OF DOOM because LP is leeching off Drake's heat, I guess. LP just shrugs with the TEETH OF MR. T (seriously; they are like floor tiles) as J. Gander and Drake exchange notes on the bank being so...clean. Dave THE CLEANING BARBARIAN OF LAUGHS would be proud indeed. Vlad blows Drake off because he has a disorderly mind and cannot accept being clean. Drake blows him off in kind because Gander wants his disorderly mind. Do you get the feeling that Vlad and Drake really HATE each other here? Gander stops the stink eyes since the entire nation's banks have been wiped clean literally. Gander gives as the education statement of the episode because printed money is POWERFUL and can kill nations. I knew it! I knew that money is really EVERYTHING. I think the world owes Nintendo an apology then.

Gander then basically accuses Vlad of being a bad detective and that Drake should be called in because CHAOS RULEZ! Bad spelling intentional. Drake really blows Vlad off and Vlad chokes him! Atta boy Vlad! Teach him that being mean and cruel will lead to anime purists telling parents that it is okay to launch a lawsuit for doing so in order to get their precious anime to no longer be dubbed at all. Gander gives his orders to Darkwing BIG BIRD Duck..(Cue the Ric Flair laughing his butt off on that joke here.). Watch the Ric Flair promo on Hawk from NWA Wrestling in the mid 1980's for the joke. Drake leaves looking really wasted as Launchpad warns Drake about teasing Vlad. Actually LP; it would be better if Drake DOES tease Vlad since using Drake as an international object is pretty funny. See; Vlad picks his teeth with the crowbar. Ewww! So that what Baloo gave him for Christmas in 1991. No wonder TaleSpin got screwed. Drake tells LP to ignore him and blows Vlad off away which really gets him mad. Sadly; no CHEAP HEAT OF LAUGHS to amuse me as Drake and LP drive away. Vlad then does a really funny spot of eating Gander's briefcase and then Gander telling him that it's his briefcase after Vlad destroys it. Drake is just playing with his mind for a change. That's a complete 180 from Drake's usual role of burying characters.

We now head to J. Gander's office which is filled with the blank money and Gander decides to use one of the bills as a paper airplane. However; a fat duck wearing a red bandana with black spots, and a blue and white dress beckons that the cleaning crew is here. She is Ammonia Pine (voiced by Mitzi McCall) and Gander is unimpressed by her presence. So Pine uses the VACUUM CLEANER OF DOOM to suck up the money. Gander is really mad now and wants her to leave. Pine decides to really make the vacuum cleaner powerful and she takes out the trash! Now the episode REALLY SUCKS! HAHA!! Oh; wait, Ron Sparks has something to say.....

Ron: It sucks more than Shaun Desmond!

The vacuum cleaner is too powerful and Gander gets sucked into it as Pine basically kidnaps him....and there's your super evildoer of the episode: Ammonia Pine. Her weapon of choice: Cleaning. See Dave The Barbarian fans; that's why people like me hate your show. Dave THE CLEANING BARBARIAN OF LAUGHS major gimmick is that he cleans. Children don't like babyface characters who clean because they get enough of that crap from their parents when they command their children to clean their room. The last thing they want to see is a gimmick like Dave actually enjoying cleaning. They cannot RELATE to him because of said gimmick. On the other hand; Ammonia Pine is a heel and therefore it's all right for the heel to use that gimmick for the same reason as why Dave shouldn't be using it. There are other reasons why Dave sucks; but that's the major one. Also; this is the last character to mention in this episode which is good because then I don't have to make heads or tails on who is voicing them and then ignoring it after the fact. Ammonia invokes the cellphone as Gander struggles for air and freedom and we see FOWL which is a criminal organization who wants SHUSH destroyed.

They are all shrouded in darkness so we cannot see them; but don't worry about it. You'll meet the first real FOWL character in a few episodes time: Steelbeak. Pine gets off scum reference number one for the episode as she continues with the cleaning puns to amuse me and stuffs Gander in her cleaning container tray. More cleaning references which about half of them are actually witty. I'm enjoying Pine already with the gimmick in the proper context and I'm sure Dave THE CLEANING BARBARIAN OF LAUGHS is the only one giving her a face pop. Hey; Dave is really stupid, what did you expect. Gander tries to speak; but Pine gives him the feather duster to shut him up as she calls him a windfall. Huh?! I don't get that one kids. Pine starts to sing...badly..using more cleaning puns as she leaves and even remembers to turn the lights off before shutting the door. Now that's pretty cute and through too. Then Logic Break #1 rears it's ugly head as the lights are now on...err..Never mind; it's not a Logic Break because the dreaded VOICEOVER OF DOOM returns at 4:41...

Darkwing: I am the icky bug that crawls up your trouser leg...

So Drake is comparing himself to a bug now. With Vlad around that actually makes sense now as Drake kicks the door open complete with smoke (AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH) as a female voice coughs. Drake apologizes and Vlad blows him off because he's CHEAP. You would be cheap too if Gosalyn broke everything in your house Vlad. Of course Vlad is now sitting in Gander's desk. Memo to Vlad: Shouldn't you be more concerned with actually FINDING Gander instead of trying to deal with Drake? Drake gets the ROTATING CHAIR OF DEATH (Catch a wave! Dodge the dolphin or...Oh wait! Wrong show.) as he is in full EGO TRIP MODE (check the webfeet on the desk) which is responded with Vlad rotating the chair and Drake no-sells as Vlad declares that Gander is kidnapped...and he no sells it. I betcha he's in cahoots with Pine and FOWL. I hear this isn't the first time he's actually done that...

Drake gives out a lame show of shock and invokes the MAGIC LENS OF DOOM to check for clues. Drake deducts that Hooter's been Hooved. Really writers; did you make his character J. Gander Hooter just to get off that lame pun for Drake to put his foot in the wastebasket. That's just cheap laughs that I thought Disney was above doing. Drake tries to escape to do his case but Vlad grabs him by the cape because he doesn't want him too. Okay; he's hates DARKWING...DUCK. I get it guys! See; Vlad wants Drake to do it by the book and pass a certain test since no civilian can be called by SHUSH otherwise as he throws a book right into Drake's midsection and Drake goes flying to sell the move as he takes a MAN-SIZED bump out of the room. Vlad must be loving this because I think he intentionally allowed Pine to kidnap him just to get to Drake. I have a feeling that this book is going to expose Drake as the fraud he is. On the other hand; this could be fun to watch.

We head to the test as LP comments that this book has no pictures. What a fiend Vlad is?! Drake blows the book off as Vlad commences the torture and it starts with the obstacle course which means he has to make it to the other side alive. Drake does the ultra-lame SHOCK spot and starts the race. I swear that spot is Honho's weakest spot ever. I betcha Vlad finds some way to screw Drake up. Tires to start; complete with rocks. Drake aces that easily and jumps into the tight rope complete with human slicer. Drake isn't amused by it as he jumps aside and lands on his feet to the other side. Hanho is on today which is good because I get tired of talking about screwed spots from Sun Woo. Drake dares Vlad to be better and Vlad invokes the double machine fists to flatten Drake like a pancake. I love that spot. We head to the swimming pool as Drake decides to play nasty himself as he puts on the flippers. Why bother?! Drake already has them as his feet. Logic Break #1 of the episode. This test is the UNDERWATER ENDURANCE TEST OF PAIN AND SUFFERING. Okay; not quite that. I think. The task: get the microfilm from the bottom of the pool. Drake recalls his knowledge of Microesian Breath Control for inspiration.

Geez; that is so fake even I want Vlad to succeed in making sure Drake fails. I cannot stand his EGO TRIP MODE either. Drake makes some indecent organism noises before jumping into the pool. STOP WATCHING CARE BEARS 1987 YOU SICK FREAKS! THE ONE WITH THE BEARS DOING THE RACE TO SAVE CAREALOT FROM HAVING BEASTLY KING FOR A DAY! Now that's a rant! Drake finally dives in and Vlad is unamused as he invokes the white button (NOT THAT ONE!) and a panel opens in the swimming pool to reveal five gators. They are normal gators sadly. I guess even Vlad's book is against using steroids too. Drake gets the microfilm and is surrounded by the gators. So Drake swims upwards and jumps right out of the pool and uses the crowbar to hold the gators back. Eww!! That has Vlad's germs on it. Drake is relieved until LP states that it was closer than he knows as Drake looks back and sees the gator's false teeth attached to his behind. That's pretty lame as the pussy-whipped gator grabs his teeth from the butt and puts them back in. If you really want to be manly; go all the way and have the gator attached to Drake's butt.

That would be one step up from Kit biting Don Karnage's butt off-screen. Anyhow; we go back to the PA room where Vlad is amazed that he has passed the first two test. Well the second one yeah; but I contest the first one on grounds that Drake was flat as a pancake and would be dead in real life. So Vlad decides to invoke one final simple test. If only it were simple. And Vlad finally slurs the word expected to try to sound like a smart Russian. Memo to Ron: It didn't work. You still sound like a Russian who speaks perfect English. Drake puts on the football helmet and a bulletproof vest as Drake ponders the last test. Playing kazoo with the philharmonic is really funny and I'm surprised Disney allowed that one since that is over the heads of all the 6-12 year old's watching this show. Careful now; that's how TaleSpin got screwed. Vlad just says to live as he invokes the machine gun on Darkwing. Ooooo. Now you know that Vlad is really EVIL. Or not, maybe just sadistic. The smoke cloud arises AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH as Drake lives to show Vlad the bullets coming out of his gloves in a lame magic spot. Drake wants the rest test to begin.

Vlad admits to being too soft and decides to use the BIG BERTHA TANK OF DOOM on him as he takes the BULLET to the midsection and cuts a cute promo while the bullet is stuck in his bulletproof vest. I gotta to get one of those. Criminal would fear me, or not. Vlad is ticked off and the urge to kill is rising. Sorry Vlad; as much as I enjoyed your attempt at torturing DW; DW has too big of an ego to take down. Unless you tell him that he failed the test of course. Sadly; Vlad wants blood so he goes for the missile launcher. Sorry Vlad; blood isn't allowed until 1994 when Goliath was allowed to bleed from the hand. The missile are ON TARGET; but Drake is still standing, although he is selling the shots like he is drunk. This is getting way too violent for my liking as Vlad invokes the ultimate weapon on Drake and that finally works on him as LP cringes in disgust as he goes for the dustpan. You know Vlad; just saying that he failed the test would have done the job better since Drake's got an ego...and of course; Drake lives despite being in a wheelchair with bandages on his arms and legs plus an arm's in a sling. That's a little overkill and doesn't make sense; but it's COMEDY BABY! Took me nine minutes in to come up with that statement.

Drake's in EGO TRIP MODE again which proves that Vlad has failed in terrible fashion. I guess that's why J. Gander depends on DRAKE to do SHUSH's dirty work. LP slaps DW on his bad arm (as if that makes a difference here) and DW jumps out in pain and we see that only his arm was truly broken. Logic Break #2 for the episode. We go to the area where forms are filled because according to DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!- It's been months since I've been able to invoke that joke) he must fill out forms. Oh; I get Vlad's MIMI JOKE ZONE plan now. Since Drake hates boredom; filling out forms would make him bored to death and he would fail the test. Drake has to fill dozens of forms just to get permission to fill out hundreds of other forms bought by the dogsperson who doesn't speak with the crane technique. Too funny as Vlad accuses Drake of sleeping on SHUSH time. Drake blows him off as he is screwed badly now. Vlad decides to give him the mission anyway and Drake cheers as it's time to get dangerous. Vlad stops him from doing that because it's against DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!). Memo to writers: Don Rosa does this plot better than you do. Drake is forced to read the filefolder and Drake gasps...badly...

As we head outside to see that Drake is inside the diaper truck sulking that he has to do the mission by DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!) Drake hates this mission as LP sucks on a sucker just to amuse me with the squeak sound. LP calls it relaxing which is funny because he doesn't have any babies to babysit if you know what I mean. Except Molly Cunningham of course. She's no baby and it's not because she can invoke MOLLY VIOLENCE on my shin (ALL HAIL!). Okay; it is. Anyhow; Ammonia Pine arrives in the street sweeper of pain (and I do mean pain since it takes some wussy bumps in the process.) to do some more wiping off ink so to speak. More cleaning puns ensue; although ring-around-the -dollar is pretty funny and fitting in a capitalistic world. Pine invokes the water hose on CitiDuck Bank (guess which bank they are referencing) which is a neat pun for some reason. Oh great; now I'm making lame cleaning puns. Drake confirms her as Ammonia Pine who was consumed by fumes of a bathroom disinfected and became an insane cleaning Mrs. Hyde.

Of course this is Drake and he's full of it. She probably got ticked off that someone put chocolate in her cleaning tools and snapped. Drake wants action; but DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!) state that they should call headquarters first. It's clear that Vlad only cares about getting Drake's goat so I'm inclined to agree with Drake on his action now. Wow; he finally got over and it took a stereotypical Russian Bear to do it. Well; live and learn unless you are Vlad. Then you just MURDER Drake for your own amusement. Drake springs into action to save J. Gander using a wrench, A FIRE HYDRANT OF PEEING (No way I'm using Wii as a pun here.) and more cleaning puns. They just go together. The WATER OF FORCE manages to sweep the clean sweeper right into the bank! And Drake accuses Gosalyn of breaking stuff? On second thought; Vlad is in the right here. The money comes out in bubbles as Ammonia Pine comes out with...say it with me...more cleaning puns. She sics the PLUNGER BUBBLE GUN OF DOOM on our GANG OF GAG which is a neat weapon in the correct context of her gimmick. Dave should invest in one since goodness knows if he can defeat ANYONE with LULU THE ANNOYING SWORD OF PAIN. ..and it's in MACHINE GUN mode in case anyone cares. LP and DW are all wet; but Drake doesn't sell well. Drake goes for the gas gun to suck gas and the gas canister comes out in a real bubble.

Too funny as Ammonia Pine agrees with me on that spot. See folks; cleaning heels equals fun, cleaning babyfaces equal bad show that should have been canceled after one episode. Ammonia blows the canister of sleeping gas into LP's face and he pretty much goes to sleep. The selling here is pretty lame from Launchpad. Maybe Ducktales wasn't carried by him after all. Ammonia invokes the PLUNGER BUBBLE GUN OF DOOM which is turned to bubble encasement mode. Did the writers play Mega Man 2? If so; it's nice to see Bubbleman's weapons being used by a better character. Pine states that hot air does rise. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments as Drake tries to wake up LP by slapping him RIGHT IN THE FACE! I didn't think they would allow that spot since anime doesn't. Launchpad wakes up as Drake hopes to make it to the river before the bubble pops. Sadly; Launchpad uses the finger to pop the bubble (DUH!) as they free fall towards the river (DUH! I think..) to end the segment about 12 minutes in. Not a bad episode so far.

After the commercial break; we see Drake free falling as Drake calls for LP to hold on as Drake uses his cape to float to safety. Well; gravity took a vacation in Getting Antsy so it wouldn't be the first time fuzzy cartoon logic rears it's ugly head. LP is TOO FAT (WHAT?!) and Drake tries to steer towards the river even though they are in the MIDDLE OF THE CITY. Logic Break #3 for the episode as Drake's cape rips apart. Finally; gravity gets its revenge as they land on the power wires and they don't die as a result. Well they are birds; so I guess the spot works. I believe that scene was cut on the Disney Channel for obvious reasons. So it's just like the TaleSpin DVD which is A-OK with a cherry on top for me! The power wires are used as the slingshot beckons which just isn't as cool unless Molly Cunningham is involved. DON'T YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT YOU SICK MOLLY HATERS! They bounce up towards the crescent moon and then free fall again as they land with a MAN-SIZED bump into the junkyard onto the tires. As much as people would like to say that this is PC, there is one problem with that. THEY FELL FROM ABOUT TEN THOUSAND FEET! It's not like they would live in real life either way.

Launchpad rolls around in the TIRE OF DOOM and then gets out as he was lucky. Drake is caught in a lead pipe and is rolling around. Too funny. I'm amazed how out of character LP has become to suggest that Drake would see a chiropractor. Shouldn't he say back doctor?! HA! I made a funny! Too bad DW not laughing as LP suggests a plumber. Please LP; STOP whizzing in and out of character. We go back to the clean sweeper as Ammonia Pine is driving...badly...and looks really nasty. More than usual anyway as she makes it to a cleaning factory and enters from the garage. I called that one easily enough. Inside is cleaning stuff that only giants would use. Aw; that must be the order for THE NASTY, STINKY, WART INFESTED GIANT from Mickey & The Beanstalk. Pine arms herself with the plunger (just a normal one) as she goes to the trashcan and opens the lid which shows J. Gander tied up. More cleaning puns commence as she kicks the trashcan's butt and that allows J. Gander to roll around taking some decent bumps along the way. At least J. Gander is doing his job to keep this episode from being average. Nice bump against the clean sweeper as Gander blows her off for justice. Too bad Vlad is too busy trying to torment Drake and Drake is too busy taking it. Ammonia PLUNGERS Hooter right in the face and flings him right into the trash can as he takes a really SICK BUMP into it. Pine has her working boots on tonight unlike Dave THE CLEANING BARBARIAN OF LAUGHS. Gander is her hostage to grab Drake, or someone. She doesn't mention it as she puts the lid on Gander as he calls her mad. You don't know the half of it old man! Pine blows him off with a cute cleaning pun and a really awesome laugh. I forgot to mention that. Mitzi has that sadist laugh going there.

We know go back to the BANK OF SLUSH..ERRR..BANK OF SHUSH as Vlad simply goes berserk as Drake is still inside the pipe. Too funny as Vlad tells him that he has been terminated from SHUSH while forcing Drake to look him in the eye. One more warning: Drake helps in any way; he goes to prison. I think that's hardly a good threat there Vlad. Maybe execution would work better; it worked with Rebecca in Time Bandit. Well; at least it was short. We head to the Bridge Tower where Drake sulks about being a part of SHUSH's goon squad. LP cries because they didn't get a going away party. Drake would walk away from this if it wasn't for J. Gander. Why? What has J. Gander ever did to help Drake?! Drake wants a clue and LP has in right in his bill which is there just so Drake can get off a lame pun. It's actually ink from printed dollar bills which was inside a trashcan from their crash landing earlier. That doesn't make any sense since we NEVER saw LP pick up a cloth. That was a pretty contrived Logic Break #4 for the episode.

We head to the top of a building as Drake proclaims that this is Ammonia's hideout and they look through the fogged up the window to see Gander tied up to the big ass death trap which is a mop squeezer. Okay; that is an awesome torture device that someone from Disney should steal for the American Dragon Jake Long show. Pine is talking to FOWL as FOWL decides to move in to the banks to take over the CITY OF SAINT CANARD. FOWL decides to let Pine kill Hooter as well since it's a perk in her contract, I guess. Pine then goes into a really sadistic promo which focuses on those oversized buckets. She is insane; there's no other explanation. Gander does a 500% better job selling than that woman in Night of the Living Spud as Pine pulls the lever (WRONG LEVER!) as the mop squeezer does its thing. Drake wants to go for the usual entrance, complete with smoke bomb and open window. However; he cuts his promo and gets arrested by Vlad. They get handcuffed as Drake protests this because Gander is going to be FLATTER THAN A PANCAKE. Vlad doesn't care because he does things by DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!). Drake tries to at least get Vlad to hurry up with doing thing by the book but Vlad doesn't care. Okay Vlad; you hate Drake! WE FREAKIN GET IT! JUST SAVE J. GANDER NOW! AT LEAST HURRY UP WITH YOUR PLANS TO DO IT BY THE BOOK! Now that's ranting! Gander is going down the giant mop squeezer as the segment ends about 17 and a half minutes in.

After the commercial break; we continue the awesome downfall of J. Gander while Vlad continues to try to break Drake's bill as Drake calls him a dope because J. Gander is DOWN THERE. Geez; trying not to blow him off and yet he manages to blow him off. Vlad is ticked off and decides to look down accusing Drake of tricking him. Sadly; Ammonia Pine clearly heard him and Vlad takes a plunger right into the kisser. It's attached to a rope which means Vlad is pulled down as the silver keys to the handcuffs fly right towards Drake's hand. I guess Vlad is disabled for the rest of the episode and I think Drake's HAPPY for it. Gander blows him off as Vlad apologizes, I think. Vlad is tied up to the mop squeezer it should be noted as Ammonia is HAPPY to finally see Vlad get what's coming to him because he played by the book. She's a terrorist; what did you expect? More cleaning puns as she pulls the lever (WRONG LEVER!) to restart the thing. I guess it stopped during the sequence where Vlad was captured so there's no logic break there. The mop squeezer does it's thing...for about three seconds as the lights go out. And you thought Paul Hayman had money trouble in ECW?! Now the dreaded OVERVOICER OF DOOM commences for the third time at 18:27:

Darkwing: I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am the pin that will burst your bubble.

Finally; a joke that is in the right context. Too bad; it's lame anyway as Pine pulls the lever (WRONG LEVER!) from the fuse box and Drake and Launchpad appear in a cloud of smoke (AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH.) wearing rain gear. Okay; that was a cute sight gag as they continue the funny with the umbrellas Hey; when in Bubble World, do what Bubbleman does, I guess. Ammonia Pine backs up and no-sells because she's got a bigger weapon. She uses a remote control device to summon: The big ass vacuum cleaner tank! Boy; Dave THE CLEANING BARBARIAN OF LAUGHS is in full organism mode if he saw this. Ammonia even steals Drake's Suck Gas line just to really get Drake mad. Drake doesn't sell (BOO! HISS! SHE STOLE YOUR FREAKIN LINE FOR GOD SAKES!) as the giant ass vacuum cleaner tank is on and sucking better than any episode of Brandy & Mr. Whiskers. The umbrella does help a little; but they get sucked in. LP struggles as Drake invokes the grappling hook gun (which is immune to the Lasso Bane joke it should be noted) and it wraps around a pipe above the mop squeezer. The babyfaces hangs on for dear life as the rain gear is gone now. So now the animators decide to do the rope snap spot (NOT THAT SPOT..Ooops; wrong show!) and they finally get sucked into the machine rendering the previous sequence pointless. Well; you got to find a way to waste time without interactions to back you up.

They proceed to bounce inside the vacuum cleaner taking wussy bumps along the way; except for the good bump to the beak for LP. The vacuum cleaner (I'm sick of writing the pun now; so shoot me) goes into a tailspin (BWHAHAHAHA!) as Drake takes the VLAD RULE BOOK OF DEATH right in the chops. Good bump there animators. LP calls the book useless; but Drake calls it a lifesaver basically as he tears pages out of it and throws it into the vacuum cleaner to clog it badly. LP gets out an education reference as Ammonia tries to pull the plug; but nothing doing as the vacuum cleaner explodes and paper flies everywhere making it dirty. Ammonia Pine is in real SHOCK now because the place is dirty. Drake blows him off saying he never pick up his bedroom. Drake better be glad Gosalyn isn't around because she would give him hell right now for making her clean up her room. Ammonia Pine is now officially ticked off and the urge to kill is rising now.

So she goes to old reliable PLUNGER BUBBLE GUN OF DOOM to attack Drake. It's on Bubble-Encasement in case you are wondering. Drake and LP split up as LP get Gander and DW gets Pine. That would made a cool lawyer team there. Pine continues to shoot to kill; but she runs out of bubbles. You know you are finished when THAT happens. Pine than uses the MOP OF PAIN as a spear as see gets off scum number two for the episode while talking about staining her record. Is that 45 or 33 1/3 LP there Pine? Drake gets the RIC FLAIR BROOMSTICK (complete with broom actually) as they exchange cleaning puns while riding on bubbles. You know fuzzy cartoon logic is in session when Drake and Ammonia weigh less than a bubble. TaleSpin never resorted to this cheap spot even in their cartoon sequences. Ammonia slices a bubble in two and it pops causing Drake to fall. But he falls onto another bubble and the fight resumes with a sword fight. That would have worked if they were using smaller sticks; but then again THEY ARE ON BUBBLES! I guess those bubbles are laced with steroids now. It's the joke that keeps on growing water sacs. We go to LP releasing Gander and Vlad from the mop squeezer.

Vlad is still screwed of course since he cannot see anything and therefore cannot hear anything and therefore cannot screw Drake anymore. Got that? Okay; back to Idiots with Brooms as the fight continues on the bubbles. Bubbleman would be proud. Drake gets off another bad cleaning pun as he whacks the mop away from Pine. See; FLAIR BROOMSTICK OF DOOM trumps SHANE DOUGLAS MOP OF DOOM. Drake gets off another cleaning reference as Pine invokes the PLUNGER HARPOON OF DOOM. Okay; the plunger thing is getting overplayed now as Pine pops Drake's bubble and Drake falls which allows him to wrap himself around a steel pole. If only that thing could pop his ego then my bubbly dreams would come true. Ammonia decides to escape but she drops the PLUNGER HARPOON OF DOOM and Drake grabs it. Oh; that wasn't contrived at all no siree! Drake throws it into Ammonia's bubble and she free falls (while sounding lame) right into the mop squeezer and gets squished almost to death as everyone cringes in horror except for Vlad who cannot see. Lucky Vlad; since that last sequence was really contrived which is sad because this episode was very well done until the finish.

We head outside the factory as two SHUSH agents (dogspeople I think) are carrying out Ammonia Pine who is about 200 pounds lighter and about three feet taller. Yeah; she's flat as a pancake and still alive. Hey; it's COMEDY BABY! She goes out with more cleaning puns to amuse me as Gander thanks Drake for his service to this country. I just hope Gander fires Vlad; but of course it'll never happen anyway because he's the big dumb Russian Stereotypical bear with muscle. Drake shakes hands as he states he did it by the book. Of course he didn't say that he did it with the book as the plunger is finally off Vlad's face. Drake teases him by throwing the book on top of his head and Vlad gets ticked off (Sadly; no CHEAP HEAT OF LAUGHS) as the episode ends at 21:07 . Really terrible finish aside; that was one pretty good episode with no cartoon spots blown and only four logic breaks. Hey Dave; THAT's how you do the cleaning gimmick! *** ¾ ( 95%)


THE REVIEW LINE

Well; I don't like SHUSH that much but Vlad did a great job in getting Drake's goat and Drake did an excellent job of finally putting Vlad over into a guy who just wanted Drake to stop acting like a bad influence and leeching off the SHUSH agents. He is really violent with his use of guns; but he can outsmart Drake with stuff that isn't violent. Gander was okay and he took some decent bumps; but nothing really special. Ammonia Pine was great actually. Sure; she's another one joke gimmick; but she really made me laugh with her over-the-top cleaning weapons that were in the right context. I'm sure Dave was booing when Pine lost to them; but she had to lose since she was a heel. I enjoyed the cleaning gimmick much more when someone is a heel and Pine played it to the hilt. The sad thing is that the part where the whole place was littered with papers and she whines about it being dirty should have been the finish and she should have went insane and go to prison.

Instead; they were forced to waste time by doing a contrived ending where Pine basically defeats herself by basically giving Drake the harpoon plunger just so Pin could take the final sick bump into the giant mop squeezer. The end result was funny; but the buildup to it was contrived and it was devoid of even fuzzy cartoon logic with Ammonia Pine being 300 pounds and being able to stand on a bubble. It made no sense. They should have saved that spot for another episode where they could be build it up better. Anyhow; other than that it was a really good episode with four logic breaks and no blown spots. Not as good as I Only Have Ice For You; but better than On A Wing And A Bear so it does count for something along those lines. Next episode is Megavolt's debut and the Superhero is blind episode. I going to dread ranting on that episode.

Thumbs in the middle; pointing up for this episode and I'll see you all next time.

 

Back to Darkwing Duck Rants Index!

Return to the Rant Shack!

Return to the Unofficial Kit Cloudkicker Homepage