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Cleanliness Is Next To Badliness

Reviewed: 05/28/2007

Round Two of the Cleaning Gimmick and a heel who is DIRTY!!

If you thought that Drake couldn't get more full of himself; then this episode should change your mind. So let's rant on shall we...

The episode is written by Steven Hibbert and Gary Sperling. The story has been edited by Tom Minton. I don't know who Steven Hibbert is (and USIMDB gives me nothing unless it's really Stephen Hibbert who wrote episodes for MAD TV and Boy Meets World.) so no jokes on him just yet..This is the third episode animated by WD-OZ which is a good change of pace from the Sun Woo's of the world.

We start this one inside a hotel room overlooking the CITY OF SAINT CANARD as Steelbeak (wearinga purple suit to show how to be really gay) returns after a good episode on Disc Two (and who would have thought THAT would happen?!) and is in his loveseat talking to a human (?!) with an all green outfit and glasses about dates. Steelbeak cuts her off from one because of the MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN which is delivered on the television set from FOWL. Man; I was fooled for a second there since that human girl looks like she's completely inflatable. Must be the next date for Michael Cole. The lady is bumped off the loveseat and falls through the trapdoor. Reminder to future ladies in Saint Canard: Do not date Steelbeak. His red mane makes him look ugly. FOWL is not too pleased about Steelbeak's lack of respect for grabbing the money. FOWL suggests that Steelbeak do some petty crimes such as robbing several banks of their money and Steelbeak blows it off because he's a master criminal...for me to poop on! FOWL threatens to withhold Steelbeak's salary and that's enough for Steelbeak to agree with the MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN. And Logic Break #1 rears it's ugly head early on as Steelbeak is now wearing his usual gangster suit. One minute in and WD-OZ is already screwing up spots like Sun Woo? I've already gone through a Kennedy Cartoon like that! The last thing I need is to see the in house studios screw up.

And then it switches back into what Steelbeak was wearing in the beginning of this episode about five seconds later when he goes to the mirror to comb his red mane. We're talking near Mister T levels of animation here folks; although Mister T was known for coloring errors happening one half of a second after another instead of two seconds here. Steelbeak still doesn't want to do it; but Steelbeak's image tells him that the predecessor was MURDERED using about six trash compactors; give or take one...and then the crack animators once again changes Steelbeak to regular clothes despite the fact that the pink flowers in the vase stay the same the whole time. Three straight logic breaks in the last 15 seconds caused by the best animation studio Disney has?! Even WD-Japan didn't make such obvious gaffes. Steelbeak of course still won't get his own hands dirty; so he calls agent Ammonia Pine on the television and laughs..badly.

Ammonia is still cleaning as she wipes the television monitor and I'm glad she's here since it's the return of the cleaning puns. Steelbeak has a dirty offer for her. If it were clean; she wouldn't bite see. There's a knocking on the door and Steelbeak answers it. Ammonia Pine comes in and she wants that stain. Steelbeak has no stain to give; so he counters with the flowers from the vase and they have a romantic moment as Pine turns the flowers to dust with her cleaning stuff. Steelbeak asks her to lay off the cleanser which got her so high on cleaning in the first place (so claims Steelbeak; which is still more truthful then Drake's own description of Ammonia's origin.) and gives her the offer to clean up some dirty banks in exchange for love. Those two are meant for each other since Pine needs to clean up Steelbeak's inability to get over with me.

We head to Drake's house with the STOCK MUSIC OF DOOM to annoy me as we are in Gosalyn's room which is still messy and filled with Perfect Guy action stuff. Gosalyn has her own plan to make the money: Have the DARKWING...DUCK fanclub. BWHAHAHAHAHAHA! If you thought Drake couldn't be more full of himself now; watch when Gosalyn manages to convince fans to worship a guy who is full of himself. Death reference #1 ensumes (killing) as Gosalyn stuffs the t-shirt over Honker's head...and Drake arrives to tell Gosalyn to clean up this fire trap. Memo to Drake: You can say death trap on this show. Disney is not 4Kids Entertainment where death doesn't exist. They all went to the Shadow Realm (I do admit that Shadow Relm is a good sub for hell; but not for death.) and there is my joke on anime for the week. Gosalyn shows Drake the prototype of pain and suffering if you are Drake Mallard; otherwise it's the PROTOTYPE OF LAUGHS which is bigger than she is of course. Drake is stunned at all this which is fitting since he's usually stunned when I call him REALLY STUPID.

Drake sees the picture and it's an art masterpiece in the making. Sadly; Drake is one of those guys who thinks that is obscene and defamatory and therefore tries to weasel his way out of the deal. Drake cuts his promo but no witty subtext so it sucks. See; he uses the element of surprise to defeat villains. Memo to Drake: Watch Kit stealing Sub-Electron Power Amplifier from Don Karnage. Take notes. Gosalyn claim that Drake's the best and does her CANNOT FAIL IF SHE WAS LIT ON FIRE CUT ROUTINE which Drake actually considers. Usually he blows it off and Gosalyn has to hold her breath to get her way. I guess has learned his lesson. Or not as the Flash Quack shows up in the window and yes; it's another thrilling episode of FOWL VS. SHUSH which seems to populate episodes involving Steelbeak and Ammonia Pine. Drake takes the fortune cookie from the mouth of the Flash Quack (insert Flash Funk joke here) and apparently Drake has to check on banks that were robbed in complete silence. Of course they were robbed in complete silence; they were closed for the night.

SHUSH should learn the proper way of using common sense. Gosalyn eggs him on as Drake says that this is a job for DARKWING..DUCK! Gosalyn wants to join in and Drake blows her off because she still has to clean her room. Gosalyn thinks about holding her breath for a split second and then decides to accept her fate and Drake leaves. Actually; Gosalyn doesn't mind because there is some money to be made and corporate strategic planning is in order. Now I know why people hate multinational corporations: They don't clean their room when THEY ARE TOLD. It's all very clear now. We head to a bank that is completely sliced in half as Drake and Launchpad look around for clues. Ah; I see Launchpad's new contract hasn't affected his work rate any. I'm beginning to see why Baloo was considered for TaleSpin instead of him. Drake wonders why this is happening as Gosalyn and Honker arrives with the DARKWING....DUCK FANCLUB which about three kids; two boys, one girl. Well; you got to start somewhere. Drake whisper yells at Gosalyn because he declared that he would think about it. Geez; Drake, did you realize with Gosalyn that I'll think about it means yes. She is an absolutist after all; unlike Kit who is a realist. Gosalyn pushes the issue and Drake decides that he'll wing this one. So Drake jumps onto the split bank and cuts the first promo which isn't full of himself. Oh come on Drake! If you are going to do this right; the full of himself promo has to be cut at all times. Otherwise; your character comes off as generic.

The fat fan blows him off who is voiced by Rob Paulsen it should be noted since Disney thought hiring real boys actors was too expensive. Then again; they thought the Atlantis TV series was too expensive when it was ready to be shipped to their animation plants which I believe sealed Jymn Magon's fate with Disney for good so I'm not shocked. Drake finally cuts his full of himself promo as the building slides away into the street. Drake is forced to follow it as we head to the thrilling traffic cop directing traffic in a busy street. Keep Frosty the Snowman out of this! The traffic cop panics as he sees the building sliding on bubbles which pretty much gives away the villain right there for Drake. However; since Drake is REALLY STUPID, I doubt he would notice. Drake gets in front of the building complete with Hanna Barbera Running Sound and Looping Effect. If this was Sun Woo; well you know.

Drake tries to stop it; but he's REALLY STUPID because here is the brick wall to squash him flatter than Alexander the Grape. Yeah; I stooped to using a friends joke from 20 years ago; so shoot me. The bump was pretty good this time around. The fan club blows him off and Gosalyn defends him. Yeah; defending a hero who is flatter than 90% of the New York Yankees baseball team. And congrads to the Boston Red Sox for having the best record in baseball after fifty games. Maybe the next World Series after winning it all in 2004 will only take three years after all. Or maybe not (Note From The Future: Boston won the World Series in 2007.) as Drake blows himself up and blows a bubble. What message are we sending to kids that drinking Ammonia Pine's bathwater is a cool thing to do?! Drake realizes that it's the work of Ammonia Pine which is a new record for him of getting it. Drake and Launchpad leave as the fan club tries to follow but Gosalyn blocks them. See; the demonstration is over, so they have to pay money to see the next one. The of course runs with the money in tow to get their tickets (helpfully in a roll in Honker's hands). Oh man; did Gosalyn give them the KOOL-AID OF REVISIONISM and it's finally starting to kick in?!

We now head further into the STREETS OF SAINT CANARD as Ammonia Pine is driving Steelbeak into town with the WINE BOTTLE CAR OF ROCKET PAIN. Aww; it has a black pitch fork as seats; how cute?! I thought Drake was drunk when he is dazed and confused. They continue with the romance as they park in front of another bank. Steelbeak needs to get that laugh checked. It's filled with talent eating worms. They exchange pleasure thoughts as Ammonia Pine jumps onto the front of the WINE BOTTLE CAR OF DOOM and Steelbeak presses the button. I don't care which color as the SUDS PUSHER OF DOOM starts to push the building off it's foundation. And you thought Dirty Money's finish was contrived?! She then invokes the BUBBLE LEAD OF PAIN (in Bubble pushover mode) as the bubble pushes the building over and it takes a MAN-SIZED bump onto the ground. Ammonia wants the SUB-BUB OF DOOM and Steelbeak invokes the green button as the vacuum sucks up the money from the vault on the ground floor. Now there's a quality way to rob a bank. Too bad it's too silly to work in real life. Or is it?! The moral question of the week to ponder as Steelbeak finally starts with a lame cleaning pun and Ammonia bear hugs him almost to death. Memo to Steelbeak: Leave the puns to her.

We head back as Drake ponders Ammonia Pine's crimes and decides that she's working with a partner. Unless you count Dirty Money of course which was her only appearance on television. Logic Break #4 for the episode as Drake and Gosalyn have a meeting of the minds...and it wasn't at the water cooler. Nice bump there by the way as Drake blows Gosalyn off..For about three seconds as he sees the DARKWING..DUCK fan club showing up with blindfolds over their guys which earns another whisper yelling to Gosalyn from Drake. Does the term “full of yourself” mean anything to you Drake? The blindfolds come off as Gosalyn has that covered and the FANCLUB is HAPPY. It doesn't take too much to get THEM excited as Drake swears in DUBBED ANIME STYLE (shucks!) and decides to do some more hero stuff. Drake does the smoke cloud disappearing trick and it works as he reappears on the window sill.

The fan club pops for it as Drake appears on the control panel. Well; at least the fan club isn't sounding like a bad organism here since there are children characters present. Drake finally appears in front of them as he will force Launchpad to do some work to make up for the contract he signed by providing the next demonstration. I'm amazed that he's not in his full of himself mode today. These children aren't really that bright. Even the Jungle Jerks were brighter than this as Launchpad arrives as Drake calls him a thug. Launchpad's expression on that spot is priceless as Drake corrects himself kind of. Too funny as Drake basically MURDERS Launchpad with his ultra lame LEAD GRIP KUNG FU ACTION KICK OF DEATH as the lame stars from Sun Woo rear their ugly head in a WD-OZ cartoon. I knew Sun Woo was a bad influence. Launchpad tries to run away; but Drake slaughters him off screen as the tall fan boy (before being a fan boy was even considered cool before fan boys were also known as the cult boys.) takes notes on the notebook.

Probably to show his teacher once he gets the royalties off of it. Gosalyn throws the notebook away because she's wants to rip off the boy with the OFFICIAL DARKWING..DUCK NOTEBOOK for about $13. Tall boy gives her the money which shows that even the children (except Gosalyn, Honker and Tank to a much lesser extent) are more stupid than Drake is. She also sees the cape on the fat kid; which is considered tacky; so she gives her the Cape which is much more aerodynamic and more gay than that goofy cape for about $16. He sells and give her the money. Gosalyn is such a greasy heel here that it shows that no matter how over Kit is; Kit could not get over as a greasy heel. A sneaky, sad heel, yes; but not a greasy heel. Drake actually likes this and shakes Gosalyn's hand because he's both REALLY STUPID (but not as REALLY STUPID as those kids) and full of himself. We head to the roof as Drake is in the directors chair he stole from Hush, Hush as Gosalyn puts on the make up on Drake from the makeup kit. They discuss more marketing plans as the cell phone (when cellphones were about the size of cordless phones) rings and it's Launchpad to inform him that it's thirty seconds to showtime. Drake uncorks from the chair and the special presentation is about to begin as the FANCLUB OF DOOM (and about 200 of his friends are in attendance) as the announcer does his spiel to introduce DARKWING..DUCK! The sequence is rather lame so I'll skip it since only about six kids tops were animated for the sequence. We head to the top of the building as the plank lights up and DARKWING..DUCK is on it sparkling. I thought Sun Woo was NOT animating this episode. And of course we get the dreaded VOICEOVER OF DOOM beckoning at 9:15:

Darkwing: I am the terror that flaps in the night. I am the rhinestones on the jumpsuit of justice!

Geez; that was LAME-O Drake! Shouldn't it be diamonds?! His physically acting was much better than this promo as he cuts his dangerous promo about 9 and a half minutes in to boot. He jumps off the plank in typical full of himself fashion as we see Launchpad unintentionally hit the lever (WRONG LEVER!) which changes the scene to diving into the Rat Catcher and of course does a wussy bump off of it. Drake rides the RATCATCHER OUT OF CONTROL and smashes into the truck taking a wussy bump into it and an even wussier bump onto the ground when he springs back. Yikes; that was ultra-contrived and the FANCLUB OF DOOM still pops right on cue. I knew those members were plants. Gosalyn better be worried when the real paying fan comes to see this. Drake blows off Wayne Netwon which I have no idea who he's parodying so let's move on to the WINE BOTTLE ROCKET OF PAIN as Ammonia Pine is still on the neck of things while Steelbeak is driving. She is carrying this episode; just like riding that wine bottle.

Ammonia refers to an article about cleaning products while Steelbeak blows her off by reading something else. Too funny as Steelbeak feels screwed; but it's almost over. Then the cheering is loud enough for them to hear as Steelbeak turns around and she sees the flashing light. I thought we learned something from the Pokemon seizure incident way back?! Ammonia blows it off thinking it's Megavolt. If only Miss Pine as Steelbeak runs to the wooden stage and goes up the ladder to failure. He looks over and sees DARKWING...DUCK riding the Rat Catcher and finishing his performance which he doesn't screw up for a change. Drake then cuts a full of himself promo which is even more full of himself than usual as we go to the demonstration of his quick reflexes by invoking the flamming hoop which is probably a prop left over from Stormy Weather. However; it gets slaughtered along with Drake thanks to the BUB-SUDS OF DEATH. Gosalyn and Drake bump into each other and it's wussy as usual. Drake blows that off since it wasn't in the script; but Gosalyn shows the real villains as Ammonia Pine and Steelbeak make it on the scene.

Ammonia Pine invokes the Bubble Lead which is whoosh bubble mode as Drake is blown away with it. Launchpad tries to help; but he gets it as well and falls from the rope to a wussy bump onto the floor, breaking the chair in the process while blowing suds. Wow; Launchpad has his working web boots on today as Gosalyn goes up onto the stage and the demonstration of MURDERING FOWL begins. She hopes anyway which is the signal for Drake to be screwed. Gosalyn runs away as Drake and Launchpad storm towards the villains of FOWL. However; since Steelbeak and Ammonia aren't on the merry-go-round Ammonia uses the SHANE DOUGLAS MOPSTICK OF DOOM to spin the GANG OF GAG around. I thought we would hear a washing machine pun come out of it; but no dice as Pine stops it with the SHANE DOUGLAS MOPSTICK OF DOOM and LP and Drake go flying and take a decent bump in the process knocking them out. Steelbeak grabs them by the ankles and goes to the conveniently stored rope and Steelbeak proceeds to tie their ankles up and pull them up into the lights for everyone to boo at them for failing to do hero stuff. Steelbeak laughs it he declares death to Drake to end the segment 11 and a half minutes in. So much for WD-OZ restoring my faith in the assembly line animation stuff. You're making TaleSpin look so good now.

After the commercial break; as Ammonia Pine has the SHANE DOUGLAS MOPSTICK OF DOOM ready to MURDER our heroes and Drake blows him off. Because apparently; Ammonia getting too much heat for Drake's own personal touchy level so Drake invokes the gas gun which spews dirty smells. Ammonia of course has enough of this crap and wipes the green gas away. You were just asking for that Drake as Ammonia does a horrible spot with the mop and misses Drake by a country mile. Now WD-OZ is blowing spots as that one made Pine look really bad. Drake blows her off and tells her to accept defeat. I see Drake have been talking to Jesse Ventura since leaving WWE. Steelbeak makes up for the spot blowing by invoking the POWER OF THE PUNCH to send Drake flying complete with the rope snap spot that I REALLY LOVE..NOT! Drake takes a wussy bump which is fine since the sound people covered it up with a pie splat sound effect. Awesome punch as Drake calls it lucky.

Drake should be lucky that the FANCLUB OF DOOM hasn't turned on this match since it would be their right; albeit not because Drake is losing it. Launchpad gets one and that leads to an ultra-wussy squash bump on Drake. I would normally say that this is awful; but with LP's weight, I'll let it slide. Drake yells at him for no reason which LP gives the best reason of them all. Steelbeak and Pine run after them to finish them off as Gosalyn cannot stop the fan club from interfering. Drake and Launchpad decide to REALLY GET DIRTY as they invoke the fecal matter to muddy the waters of good taste. The fan club distracts Drake enough that he takes a MAN-SIZED bump off of Pine's SHANE DOUGLAS MOPSTICK OF DOOM. If Drake had brought RIC FLAIR'S BROOMSTICK OF DOOM with him then he would have won easily. Drake eats poop which is apporos since Pine is cleaning up on carrying this episode. Amazing enough; only the third cleaning pun of the episode ensues from Pine. I guess all the puns were used up in Dirty Money as Drake is at the mercy of FOWL CLEANING DUO OF LAUGHS. Dave THE CLEANING BARBARIAN OF LAUGHS is cheering Ammonia Pine in this one see.

Another wussy bump from the mop from Ammonia as Steelbeak isn't thrilled because Ammonia Pine hogs the action. Hey suckwad; shut the heck up, sit on your missile launcher and LIKE IT! Steelbeak tries to invoke the missile launcher; but Ammonia Pine smells poop and it's TIME TO CLEAN HOUSE! I would LOVE to rant on Samurai Pizza Cats because there is enough material in that Sabin dub to last me a lifetime...and that show still rules better than most properly dubbed anime ever is. Steelbeak takes some poop to the forehead as he cannot believe it. Believe it and learn to LIKE IT! Drake tries to invoke the gas gun; but Ammonia uses the SHANE DOUGLAS MOPSTICK OF DOOM to whack it off his dirty paws and Steelbeak tries to grab it. It's slick as soap as it slips out of everyone's hands (heel or face) and Ammonia gets whacked as a result. Huh?! Explain THAT ONE KIDS?!

Steelbeak gets pushed over Launchpad by Drake and that's it for the heels. What a lame way to end the demonstration and of course the girl takes his picture; but cannot take his soul. I was wishing that it did steal his soul; so I never have to hear or see him be full of himself. Drake tries to invoke the gas gun; but Drake eats Bubble Lead. Bubbleman would be proud that Pine has actually improved his sad legacy of being the weakest boss in Mega Man 2. Drake takes a wussy bump as Pine drives the wine bottle while calling him Sludge Face. Please; clean his clock Ammonia. For once; I'm with DAVE THE CLEANING BARBARIAN OF LAUGHS when it comes to this episode. Sadly; she pushes the red button and she gets NOTHING...AND THE POOP SEZS NOTHING! WD-OZ didn't do a good job of positioning Steelbeak as he was really close to being in the line of fire of that thing. Then again; I want to see him cleansed so I'm sad to see it not work. They are out of ammo of course. You know you're screwed when THAT happens. The heels are forced to bail (but not before a grade-A acting job from Mitzi on the poop on the ground.) and Drake trips on himself and takes a decent bump on his beak as usual. Fat Kid cheers on Drake despite Drake looking REALLY STUPID and Gosalyn isn't amused of these events as her MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN is becoming undone.

We return to Drake's living room as Drake is watching television ads for himself which is not surprising at all to me because he would if the TV spotlight were ON HIM NOW. Gosalyn hops onto the sofa and tries to weasel her way to getting rid of the DARKWING ...DUCK fan club. Drake blows it off because it's working out for him. Or because he's full of himself of course as WD-OZ really upsets me by making it darker than it was about ten seconds earlier. Gosalyn tries to explain that he's basically full of himself and gets off death reference #2. Wow; Gosalyn telling Drake where to stick that attitude. Reverse Stormy Weather perhaps?! Drake blows it off and now Gosalyn is ticked off as she turns off the television. Oooooo; now you know this is getting serious! Drake blows her off and basically announces that he's running the FANCLUB OF DOOM and Gosalyn is forced to clean her room as usual as Drake leaves. Gosalyn crumbles up the paper regretting she EVER tried that MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN. Like this was a major surprise because after all Drake is so full of himself.

So we go into the THUNDERQUACK OF DOOM as Drake and Launchpad fly to demonstrate the action part of the MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN to the DARKWING...DUCK fan club. Drake is going to regret he ever BLEW HIS COVER for a bunch of dumb hero chasers. The tall kid is using the note book to take it down for the fan letter which will probably never be published. We see the wine bottle car down on the STREETS OF SAINT CANARD. Hey Drake; isn't there a law about flying the Thunder Quack too low?! Oh wait; this is lawless Saint Canard; my mistake. They land the Thunder Quack as Drake tells the fan club to be quiet and let a master do his work. That is so funny it should be mocked; but I must go on as Drake does the tip-toe. What?! No Hanna Barbera Twinkle Toe's Sound Effect?! That is SO CHEAP as the fan club cheers on Drake and cannot keep quiet. What is Honker doing here?! I thought he would be with Gosalyn since he's her girlfr...Okay; Gos, you're not, let's move on..Eeek! (About three hours later I return to my desk roughed up and eyes poked.) Okay; Honker and Drake tell them to shut up but no dice as Drake is screwed as usual since Steelbeak sees them and is ready to pounce on our babyfaces. Drake decides to give them a big entrance as he does the smoke cloud trick again and the dreaded VOICEOVER OF DOOM beckons on top of the wine bottle car at 14:55:

Darkwing: I am the terror that flaps in the night. I am the stain that cannot be rubbed out!

Yeah; Drake is REALLY STUPID as Launchpad joins him as Steelbeak is amused by his REALLY STUPID entrances. I was hoping Ammonia Pine would WHACK him after that promo but no dice. Come on writers; throw me a bone here! Steelbeak plays along as he pretends to give up (the bad acting gives it away) as Drake puts on the handcuffs. Oh come on Drake; the bad acting should give away the fact that he's pretending to surrender and you're going to be MURDERED. Of course; the babyfaces sell it like Drake since they are dumber than Drake. My respect for Honker goes down a notch since he was cheering. He should have stayed with Gosalyn; it was a better path. Drake is full of himself as Launchpad wonders where Ammonia Pine is and she comes right on cue to spray the water cannon on them.

Apparently; the poop didn't all wash out from the previous scene. The blast is on SLEEPING SUDS MODE which the heroes take a wussy bump against the brick wall and knock themselves out. Otherwise; that's bad form by WD-OZ. Ammonia sprays Steelbeak's hands to release the handcuffs for good measure as she is carrying this episode kicking and screaming. That is one tough bleach as she decides to nail the kids with the water hose just to show her compassionate side. The fan club plus Honker get knocked out of the Thunder Quack and then get sucked in by Steelbeak. I never thought I say this; but I like Steelbeak now as he has taught those nosy kids what happens when you get sucked into DARKWING..DUCK's full of himself promos. Drake and Launchpad slip and slide on the bubbly street as Steelbeak basically tells Drake to forget coming after the fan club or they will be MURDERED more or less. Steelbeak and Ammonia Pine drive away from the scene with the fan club tied up behind them. Drake and Launchpad fall down on the street in a cute spot to end the segment 16 minutes in.

After the commercial break; we see Steelbeak driving the wine bottle car down Saint Canard as the love romance continues. Why is Ammonia Pine untying Honker?! That makes no sense whatsoever since he should remain tied up. Ammonia finally pops the question as she wants to get married. Now there's a quality marriage that should have been looked into by the writers. The marriage music comes on as Steelbeak basically blows it off with bad acting and Ammonia doesn't like that response. Thankfully; Steelbeak calms her down quickly with quiet time after the crime wave is over as the mess monitor is beeping and I suspect DARKWING...DUCK didn't get the message. Oh wait; it's a piece of chewing gum on a bench. Too funny as Ammonia goes to clean it up much to Steelbeak's disgust. The distract allows Honker to use his webfeet to squeeze the acid and that destroys the ropes. Honker teases helping the others and then turns on them by blowing the BLUE BUBBLE OF WII and floats away on it. Well; at least the writers are keeping the devices constant. The last thing we need is for Honker to get on a ROIDED bubble and have it burst like a water sac.

Honker floats away as Ammonia finishes mopping up a bench which actually had DARKWING..DUCK's logo on it. That absolutely cracks me up that Ammonia managed to make Drake full of himself without Drake actually doing the work. We head on the streets of SAINT CANARD as Drake's ego is deflated and he's drunk at the same time as he and Launchpad slip and slide on the street. Drake is sorry he didn't listen to Gosalyn. Well; Gosalyn is supposed to be Kit's female half (sort of) so maybe you should have thought of that Drake while you're making love with the stop sign. Launchpad blows him off which is too funny as Drake blows him off in kind. Drake decides to take FOWL out and Launchpad doesn't want him to do it as they continue to slip and slide for my pleasure and waste time. I say take them out and take your chances that Steelbeak actually MURDERS them. That will help clean out the gene pool as they say. Drake claims that he doesn't know the meaning the word defeat. Drake doesn't know the meaning of most word as Launchpad gleefully helps me blow off Drake for my pleasure. We head to Gosalyn's room as Honker finally arrives and the bubble pops right on cue. Honker relays to Gosalyn that Drake and Launchpad are all washed up and the kids are kidnapped. Honker mentions the mess monitor and Gosalyn still wants to save them. I guess she doesn't want to hear the lawsuit that might follow if she refuses. However; she wonders about the mess monitor and Honker states what it does. Gosalyn has a new MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN as she is going to completely mess up and destroy Drake's house which would be enough to bring Ammonia Pine flying over. Okay; this might actually work for a change.

We now see Gosalyn basically trashing up the place with the MUSTARD OF DOOM, THE BIRTHDAY CAKE OF DOOM which is trashed before it is even baked as Honker states the obvious to all of us. Oh let her Honker; this plan is going to work because this is Ammonia Pine's true weakness. Gosalyn knows what she is doing. Too bad the money she made is going to cover the $50,000 of so in damages after the episode is over. We head back to the WINE BOTTLE CAR OF DOOM as Ammonia Pine continues to talk as Steelbeak is unamused. I think the kids are more interested than he is. Well; that's Steelbeak's loss as the television screen beckons as FOWL High Command beckons as Steelbeak is successful in their mission to restore the faith in FOWL. That's just swell; even this show is showing the heels win. And you thought TaleSpin was the only one to pull that off? Oh and Ammonia Pine screws Steelbeak furthers because now they are going to be partners pretty much forever. BWHAHAHAHA! They are perfect together as Steelbeak stutter like Honker when Drake is around to bully him. And of course the smoke cloud beckons (AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH AND MOVING RATING!) and Drake shows up; only to be MURDERED by the SHANE DOUGLAS MOPSTICK OF DOOM. Yeah Drake; always step in without a MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN, that's real smart. Launchpad has much better luck with Steelbeak though as he almost defeats him by himself; but gets whacked by Ammonia's mop along with Drake. Now Steelbeak is really upset and I suspect some kids are going to get MURDERED now. However; the finish is underway as the mess monitor beeps and this is the big one so sezs Pine as she drives the WINE BOTTLE ROCKET CAR OF PAIN away. Drake calls Steelbeak a chicken. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Drake and LP get onto the wine bottle; but the FLAP OF DOOM flips up and knocks Launchpad off. Drake gets pushed by Steelbeak right into the washing machine.

Yeah; Steelbeak, wash his soul out with soap. Maybe that will stop him from becoming full of himself. Steelbeak closes the flap as the wine bottle car heads to Drake's house with Launchpad close behind. I think we know what the finish is going to be. We head to Drake's house as Gosalyn and Honker get ready for the war on clean (check the army hats they stole from Donald Duck.) as the fourth cleaning pun ensues. The wine bottle stops in front of Drake's house and slaughters it with soap suds as Launchpad does the Chip bonk spot to flip open the flap. Drake pops up and it's time to get dangerous for real as the finish is at hand with about two minutes left in the episode. More sudding as Gosalyn and Honker go outside to pour the super glue onto the foundation. How in the heck is that supposed to work?! Ammonia Pine uses the vacuum cleaner as Steelbeak loses more patience by the second. Hey let her enjoy herself and LIKE IT Steelgeek! Gosalyn and Honker hide under the bed and it's no good as everything sucks into the living room I guess. The spots are too fast to call for me as Drake demands surrender from Steelbeak and we get the JAMES BOND MUSIC OF DOOM as Steelbeak is too slow to stop Drake's dodging. Time to exercise Steelfreak! Drake invokes the POWER OF THE PUNCH on Steelbeak and Steelbeak is drunker than Jake Roberts on a field trip. Steelbeak then completely blows off Ammonia Pine for her cleaning ways. BOO HISS sezs Dave. BOO HISS sezs I! Steelbeak then rolls in the dirt (barefoot I might add) and is acting completely insane. I'm starting to like Steelbeak now that Ammonia has driven him up the looney bin. That just makes them the perfect couple to marry. Ammonia cannot stand it so it's CLEANING TIME!

This is just great folks as the sucking continues for the WINE BOTTLE ROCKET CAR OF DOOM and we get the EXACT SAME RESULT as the giant vacuum cleaner from Dirty Money basically. Drake unties the fan club and they demand a refund. Ask Gosalyn about it; she has the MONEY OF STINK. Ammonia is ticked off and is ready to report Steelbeak to High Command as Steelbeak is at her mercy. Sadly; Drake interupts her and of course the WINE BOTTLE ROCKET CAR OF DOOM explodes...badly. OH TAG WD-OZ! Ammonia grabs Steelbeak in a symbolic moment as she washes her hands clean of this affair and uses the SHANE DOUGLAS MOPSTICK OF DOOM to create a bubble trampoline and bounces away never to be seen again...until Dirtysomething of course. And Dave THE CLEANING BARBARIAN OF LAUGHS will be waiting for you my sweet. I'm sure he would LOVE to marry you. Gosalyn then shows the POWER OF A DIRTY ROOM to Drake and Drake decides to agree with her. I wish he would agree that WD-OZ's animation stinks worse than poop at this point. Drake, Gosalyn and Honker go to the dirty house as the episode ends at 21:09. Ammonia Pine carried the whole episode kicking and screaming because WD-OZ's animation didn't! That's the second time some animator other than Sun Woo has screwed me. *** ½ ( 70%)


The cleaning gimmick has done it again as Ammonia Pine once again carried an episode on her back and she also made Steelbeak really good. I'm sadden that this was their only appearance together because they are the ultimate odd couple to be sure. The entire episode as a whole was all right as nothing really stupid happened from the writers. They couldn't since Walt Disney Animation OZ really screwed up this episode with coloring mistake that would almost make Ruby-Spears blush and really wussy bumps and blown spots. This is their worst episode to date after two episode of goodness for the most part. Thankfully; Ammonia Pine made up for it and make it a good middling episode. Now I have only one episode left in this volume: Smarter Than A Speeding Bullet which I didn't like much at all...and that one features Steelbeak as well. I guess my good graces with him lasted only one episode. After that rant; I'm done until July when it's off to Gummi Bears. So..

Thumbs in the middle for this episode and I'll see you all next time.


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