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Loopy Go Home/A-Hunting We Will Go
Reviewed: 07/15/2007
Can I keep him? NO! Can I keep him? WILL YOU SHUT UP AND QUIT BUGGING ME! Part Two!
Disney seems to like kids keeping wild animals as pets and when that happens; it usually Cubbi keeping them. So let's rant on with two more episode shorts involving hunting for wild animals in this case....
Loopy Go Home is written by Doug Hutchinson and A-Hunting We Will Go is written by Kim Wells and Mike Lyons. Mike Lyons wrote live television episodes since 1984 with Kate & Allie, Harts of The West, Beverly Hills 90210, Loveboat: The Next Wave, Dr. Quinn: Medicine Woman and Diagnosis Murder in 2000. Kim Wells apparently was an actress in the 1992 movie I Was On Mars and the 1978 TV Movie Stranger In Our House before writing Dr Quinn episodes and Hollywood Squares game show. Then again; USIMDB is suspect when it came to the pilot episode; so I'm going to have to be very careful here. There are no other DTVA credits that I'm instantly aware of at this time.
Loopy Go Home: We begin in the forest with the usual pan just to show how kick butt TMS animation is as a wolf (with a baby wolf in her mouth) are running from right to left (over the fallen tree I should note) which ends close to a small cliff with the overhead shot. She slides down and there is more running from her. I find this kind of pointless since no one is chasing her. Okay; I take it back; she's been caught with the net. The cub escapes anyway and takes some rather wussy bumps into the grass. Oh well; cannot win them all I guess. The wolf's mother tries to escape from the net but no go as we see a wolf hunter (complete with net) who is clearly a heel because he has a bad beard I guess trying to catch the cub; but the cub scatters stage left. Is it just me; or does the mother have a wolf grabbing with her teeth fetish there or what?! Never mind; I was only pondering. More running from the cub and he thinks he is safe....and then he runs right into the sack held by Cubbi as he was having a picnic (check out the cloth, plates, forks, spoons and cups on the bottom right side). Cubbi grabs Loopy out of the sack and promises not to hurt him so that earns Cubbi a lick in the face. This would be the template episode for the kick butt Molly focused episode Mommy For A Day. Since Cubbi's involved; let's see if he can surpass Mommy For a Day which will be hard considering that Mommy for a Day is a ***** episode.
Cubbi hugs Loopy as the tree stump trapdoor opens and out comes Tummi and Gruffi talking about repairs and Mount something that I forgot and I'm not interested in rewinding the DVD. Cubbi shows Tummi and Gruffi Loopy and Tummi thinks it's a great puppy. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Gruffi blows Tummi off because it's a wolf cub. Okay; I agree with Gruffi on that one but his attitude about it really stinks. Loopy bites onto Cubbi's clothes while Cubbi calls him great. If you are talking about trying to strip you naked again just to tick off the parent groups then you're absolutely right. Gruffi wants him to let Loopy go free and I'm torn here. On the one hand; it's not right to enslave an animal. On the other hand; Loopy has no mother to go to right now due to that EVIL wolf hunter. Cubbi chooses to keep him of course and Tummi takes Cubbi's side of course. Gruffi refuses of course because Loopy is a menace to THE GUMMI WAY! I'll give Gruffi this though; his reasons for Cubbi to not keep him are good ones so at least he's being somewhat mature here. Cubbi wants to be responsible for his care and Gruffi blows that off as he leaves. Cubbi calls it unfair and Tummi offers to help Cubbi find a spot to let him go that isn't so heartless as we cut to the crossroads shot. Cubbi doesn't want to let go of him at the crossroads because someone will catch him. However; the GANG OF LOOPY'S SAFETY is forced to flee into the bushes because the hunter passes by which has Loopy's mother in tow in the iron cage. Tummi and Cubbi realize right away that it's Loopy's mother.
They must have great eyesight to notice Loopy's mother inside that cage from so far away. Oh wait; Loopy's whining gave her away; my mistake. Loppy, Cubbi and Tummi are forced to hide in the bushes away as Sir Tuxford, Cavin and a knight arrive on horseback to admit that the hunter is really a disgusting heel who steals animals from the king's lands and sells them to traveling shows. Of course; Sir Tuxford has a blind spot straight ahead so they take the left route instead of staying the course. Idiots! Cubbi hears everything and realizes that he cannot allow Loopy to be left alone anymore. Tummi teases no selling the thing; but he gives in to Cubbi's pleads and tickles Loopy under his neck to calm him down. If Gruffi needs to blow off steam after hating this decision; he's got Tummi to blame for allowing this..
So we head inside Gummi Glenn as Cubbi enters his room telling someone (probably Grammi) that he's tired and heading straight to bed. Considering that Cubbi is spunky; the gang should be questioning him right there. But this is 1985; so there you go. Cubbi has something under his shirt; so that means that he has food for Loopy as Loopy pops from under the bed. So it's little wolf cubs that really hide under my bed... Well; live and learn unless you are Loopy; then he just lives. Cubbi earns another lick as Cubbi takes out the silver platter (complete with sealed lid for added freshness) and puts it on the ground. He opens the lid to reveal that he's eating some yellow substance that I cannot make it. It's clearly tasty judging by Loopy's love for the meal as he eats it fast despite Cubbi's adult mimicking to chew it slow. Cute stuff as Cubbi states that Gruffi must never see him so Cubbi brings out the old sheets and puts it on the floor next to the bed. Cubbi claims that Gruffi isn't so bad. Well; as long as he doesn't do his pose; he's pretty okay. Cubbi allows Loopy to try out the new bed for size; but Loopy looks at it and then jumps right onto Cubbi's white pillow on his bed. Wow; even the animals are screwing Cubbi today. Cubbi grabs him and puts him back down as Cubbi lays right on his bed because Loopy's the animal and Cubbi's the anthro I guess. However; Loopy jumps back on whimpering and Cubbi decides to give in to him. So much for iron clad parenting from him.
Cubbi officially names him Loopy while giggling at his antics. I like the name; it suits him just as well since the official title name is Loopy Go Home after all. Loopy and Cubbi go to sleep and dream for one day when Gruffi will stop doing that annoying pose. Or something like that. We head into the book room as Zummi is on the ladder which looks like the leaning tower of pizza and looks awfully dangerous to boot. Or as Drake calls it: Saturday Morning. Cubbi comes in asking Zummi about having a new pet and Zummi thinks there is no harm in that as long as it's a field mouse or a goldfish. However; Loopy enters OUT OF NOWHERE swiping two books out of Zummi's hand. Must be the banned books Zummi was supposed to burn to destroy his satanic witchcraft; but it isn't. Cubbi looks quite bashful as we head to Sunni's room as Loopy is destroying Sunni's white undershirt dress. So Loopy hates teenybopper divas too. If so my opinion of Loopy just went up about three notches. Cubbi comes in and wonders why Loopy is in Sunni's room. Maybe it's because Sunni needs to be taught a lesson on how not to suck. Did you ever think of that Cubbi? Sunni of course is humming as Cubbi forces Loopy into the closet and shuts the door. Oh come on Cubbi! Loopy is not gay; find a better spot than that. Sunni enters and she's back into diva form as she complains about Cubbi's presence in her room. Cubbi is sweating bullets as he tries to get Sunni to back off in a nice way. Oh please; that NEVER works on teenyboppers Cubbi. Thankfully; the scene ends without us seeing Cubbi get slaughtered by Sunni's sleeping song so we head into the forest where Tummi, Cubbi and Loopy are bouncing around. Tummi dares Loopy to catch him.
Now Tummi; do you know what happens when you dare someone?! They accept it and they make you suffer for it. Loopy bounces like a Gummi Bear (HUH?!) and Cubbi laughs his butt off after that spot which Molly would perfect when WildCat locked himself into the CHEST OF DEMONS in Flight of the Snowduck. We head back into Gummi Glenn at the cupboard as Cubbi is looking for food and Loopy is getting bigger and bigger by the second. Sadly; they get caught by Grammi and you know it's night time because she's got the lamp. Maybe Grammi should reconsider Tummi's guilt in The Oracle. Apparently; Gummi Bears takes place in the real world since she screams out Atlantic Ocean when she sees Loopy raiding the kitchen with Cubbi. Cubbi defends Loopy's honor of course because it is his pet. Grammi doesn't care and wants him to leave; but Loopy whimpers like a wuss. Gruffi is slowly showing how right he was when it came to Loopy because Loopy has no instinct to be his own master so to speak. If I were Cubbi; I would save his mother right about now.
Grammi does however show that she isn't heartless and offers him the broccoli muffins that everyone refused to eat...except for Grammi of course in the basket. Cubbi of course sezs yuck the instant she merely mentions them. Grammi and Loopy proceed to do the old feed the dog spot which looks rather lame. Cubbi explains to Grammi that she's right and therefore Gruffi's right because he's not old enough to keep him. That's not what Gruffi said Cubbi. He said you couldn't keep him regardless of age because Loopy would turn into a wuss. Grammi of course teases blowing off Gruffi; but she shows the Gruffi annoying pose which probably means that she will stay with Gruffi on this one...and I'm wrong because Loopy has just been named part of the family by Grammi. How nice of her....NOT! Loopy is getting too big for his bridges right now and putting him back into the wild now would be a better choice.
We head into the forest in the morning as Cubbi is riding horsey with Loopy complete with WOODEN SWORD OF PIN PRICKS. Take one guess who is the horse in this outfit..and it's not Cubbi. What did you expect....Fairly Oddparents?! They ride around not knowing that the hunter who is an archer I should point out. We know this because he has a bow & arrow and he has found Loopy's paw tracks. This is not going to end well for him, I just know it. We head back to Gummi Glenn's entertainment room as Gruffi is using the ladder to climb up to the glass ceiling which looks like a giant fishbowl. That glass ceiling was put there to show why Disney decided to go with brand characters rather than original characters later on. Sunni is standing there doing nothing of course since she's the diva of the family here. Gruffi stands on the top of ladder as Sunni wonders what he is doing. Gruffi is cleaning the glass ceiling since Sunni refuses to do it herself. Okay; he doesn't say that, but the implication is certainly there. Gruffi wants some help as he invokes the cloth onto the glass ceiling but Sunni sneaks away leaving Gruffi high and annoying as usual. Gruffi blows Sunni off as we continues to clean the glass ceiling.
We head back outside as Cubbi is still riding Loopy and Cubbi wants Loopy to jump over that bush. So now Cubbi's dream is to be a horse jumping rider. Works for me as he doesn't really have a bush to jump over (CONTINUITY ERROR from the writer no doubt); so they jump over the hedge and they fall into the pond which so happens to be the place where the glass ceiling is and they do the peeping tom spot right in front of Gruffi which scares him half to death. I'm amazed he didn't fall off the ladder and hurt himself. That would have been funny. Sadly; Cubbi's cover has been blown as Gruffi jumps out of the TREE HOLES OF DOOM (which is the entrance of Gummi Glenn) and he's ready to put down that wolf once and for all. The other Gummi Bears follow him as Loopy grabs Cubbi by the shirt and pulls him to safety as Gruffi goes to the stick and he wants to club Loopy to death with it now. Just because he got scared that Cubbi blew his cover? This shows how annoying Gruffi can be sometimes. Cubbi defends Loopy's honor because he's his friend. It's funny how Gruffi was right about Loopy being a wuss and still he has no respect for animals on this spot.
I guess this is as a result of him being forced to like humans now that Calla and Cavin are part of the family now. Gruffi of course is upset because he told Cubbi to get rid of that beast and the rest of the Gummi Bears are actually on Cubbi's side (Tummi even agrees to take the fall for Cubbi which is a bonus); minus Sunni who is probably on Gruffi's side since Loopy torn her teenybopper dress to pieces. Gruffi blows Loopy off with the POINTY FINGER OF DEATH and states that he must go; or he'll go. Sadly; the Gummi Bears are too much of wusses to pop Gruffi out of Gummi Glenn so Cubbi decides to run away instead which makes no sense since Gruffi's the ONLY ONE who hates Loopy even though Gruffi does have a point about Loopy. And right on cue we head to the Quick Tunnel as Zummi, Tummi, Sunni and Grammi offer to look for Cubbi since he ran away despite the fact that there is no evidence on how he run away without Gruffi trying to stop him. A problem with 11 minute shorts: They are only good for plot lines that need padding to make those 11 minutes. This episode is way too short for this kind of plot line as Mommy For a Day demonstrated with a 22 minute episode. Gruffi of course doesn't want to come because he thinks Cubbi will return because he's a wuss...and they don't know where to look. Tummi suggests Mount Lookout where they found the puppy. Tummi still considers Loopy a puppy even though he's clearly a wolf cub. Maybe Loopy is a wuss now. The Gummi Sled leaves quickly as Gruffi realizes that Tummi made a huge graffe and it's supposed to be Mount Big Paw. Gruffi stomps his foot and decides to follow them in a second Gummi Sled since they would be lost. I think Tummi did that on purpose to force Gruffi to follow them. Don't you?! Yeah....
We head to Mount Big Paw as Cubbi and Loopy are enjoying themselves quite well. Cubbi is showing him the finer points of being mean and scaring off hunters; but Loopy doesn't seem to care at all. Cubbi still pets him as I'm agreeing with Gruffi a lot more than I expected. Someone is hiding behind the bushes and it is Gruffi as he has found Cubbi and he's going to lay down the law on him for running away from his parents. However; Cubbi then starts scolding Loopy by admitting that Gruffi is right because Loopy doesn't know how to take care of himself so he's going to teach him! TOTAL MARKUP CITY FOR THAT MOMENT! Gruffi does his annoying pose and is impressed that Cubbi gets it. This would mark a tradition that I'm surprised most animation today doesn't follow: Creating believable consequences for someone's actions. Cubbi took Loopy in and pampered him to the point where Loopy couldn't even take care of himself and therefore became a wuss. And when Cubbi tried to teach him how to be a wolf; Loopy acted as if he was a puppy. Now Cubbi must unlearn Loopy's learned behavior and it's not easy. Most animation does have consequences; but they are presented in such a matter that no one believes them; and therefore no one heeds them. It's one thing to have entertainment; it's another when that entertainment that panders to only the trailer trash demographic. TaleSpin made a killing of making the morals in their stories look believable, entertaining and make you want to both show sympathy and empathy towards them. Gruffi foolishly walks away saying that he has to apologize to him at once.
However; he gets caught in the net and screams for Cubbi's help. The hunter notices him from below as he sees a talking bear. It took him nine minutes to speak; what a surprise. He's also as greasy as I expected him to be. Gruffi struggles as he keeps blowing off the hunter and the hunter blows him off in kind. These two could have a debate and neither side would win since their professionalism is really unbecoming of them. Although the real winner would be us since it would be an amusing debate to say the least. The hunter gets off the first Shut Up in DTVA history it should be noted which isn't a big deal until Kit did it to Molly in Plunder and Lightning. Now that was a big deal (a 12 year old boy saying that to a six year old girl is pretty scandalous myself.) Don't ask me who did the hunter's voice because I don't know. New Gumbrea's research on the voices is pretty low. At least with TaleSpin 99% of the voices were revealed (thank you Luara!) to me so it was easy. The hunter proclaims that he will get a nice sum for a Gummi Bear to prove that they are real as Cubbi and Loopy hide behind the bushes. Cubbi needs to help his so he grabs the VIAL OF ROIDED JUICE and drinks up...It's BUTT BOUNCING TIME as Cubbi bounces to annoy the hunter a bit (and grab his sword); but the hunter finds a way to counter it by throwing the net and that stops Cubbi in his tracks. WHAT THE HECK?! I'm calling it right now: Dukie's heat is about to fly away after that spot. I mean; why didn't Dukie do this sooner?!
Cubbi calls out for Loopy; but Loopy hides because he's a pampered wuss. Folks; this is not Mommy For A Day quality at all. Cubbi tries to throw the sword to Gruffi; but Gruffi has butter fingers and the sword slips out of his paws. You know you are screwed when THAT happens. The hunter goes over to grab the netted Cubbi and he's cheering for victory and the money. Gruffi blows off the hunter because it's Gummi Bears; not Blabber Bears, a reference to Wacky Races I should note. Cubbi is whisked away by the hunter and Loopy sees the hunter in his DOUBLE VISION OF DOOM and now he's pissed...and I DO MEAN PISSED! Loopy finally summons enough courage to run and butt bounce and he pounces right onto the hunter which forces him to let go of Cubbi. Gruffi still blows Loopy off because he's now a Gummi. I wouldn't want to be on Loopy's bad side there Gruffi as Loopy is ready to MURDER the hunter. The wolf howls indicate that Sir Tuxford, Cavin and the knight on horseback would be shown and they go to the spot as the hunter is getting bounced on by Loopy like Molly Cunningham bouncing on Kit after Kit thought that babysitting Molly was easy. Cubbi proclaims that this is enough and Loopy decides to hide behind the bushes as the hunter gets up and he is SO BUSTED! Because Sir Tuxford and his knight have arrived to invoke love and justice...
Okay; just justice as the hunter tries to tell them the truth but of course the knights don't believe him while the hunter stammers like an idiot. I see Cavin has learned the fine art of not showing his bluffing on his belief in Gummi Bears now. The hunter is cuffed and taken away by Sir Tuxford and the knights. Cavin knows that there are Gummi Bears hiding as Cubbi gives him a thumbs up and Cavin nods back before rejoining the knights as Cubbi waves to them. Loopy walks away from Cubbi and finally meets his mother (or other wolves; couldn't tell) as Gruffi admits that he was wrong about Loopy and wrong about Cubbi's immature behavior while swearing in DUBBED ANIME STYLE. Gruffi allows Cubbi to keep him; but Cubbi refuse to since Loopy should stay wild after all. He tells Loopy that this is where he belongs and Loopy whimpers....for about five seconds before a growl allows Loopy to decide that he'll rejoin the pack as the sun sets slowly in the west and Cubbi waves at the retreating wolves. Gruffi praises Cubbi's adult decision right there and I agree with him on all counts. It's rare to see Gruffi and Cubbi proven wrong in the same episode. Cubbi sheds a tear and admits that he wants a goldfish. Gruffi just smiles as they hold hands (IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK YOU SICK FREAKS!) and walk away to end the episode at 10:40. I was hoping for this to be perfect; but some large logic breaks, it was way too short and it looked very rush to make the 11 minutes prevented that. Still; a good template for Mommy For A Day. **** ( 80%)
A-Hunting We Will Go: We begin in the pitch dark forest as a friar like thin human sitting on a horse drawn buggy is nearly asleep at the wheel; but he suddenly hears grunting like a wild boar is about to MURDER him at any second. And right on cue; the human is forced to whip the horse and yell to get away as the horse picks up speed and a wild boar chases him through the forest. Someone did something really bad to that boar if he's picking on humans right now in this episode. The wild boar takes a MAN-SIZED bump right into the cart and the horse panics as a wheel falls off the wagon and the wild boar just stops there. WHY?! Shouldn't wild boars be chasing their prey to eat them?! Never mind; fuzzy cartoon logic strikes again. Well; that was quick as we head to the kitchen of Gummi Glenn as Grammi is cooking, Sunni is painting Grammi's profile with a pink background (which doesn't look too bad all things considered), Tummi is doing nothing and Gruffi is annoying the girls because that's the GUMMI WAY apparently. Gruffi of course takes a lick out of the bowl with his finger just to annoy her and than blows Grammi off because there's not enough butter. Grammi blows her off in kind and moves to another table.
Grammi is pretty upset because there's no bread on the table which usually signals that Tummi ate it; but Zummi arrives to admit that he casted a Lighter Than Air Bread spell on it as the bread is lighter than Wii soaking wet. Grammi wants it down so Tummi jumps up and eats it in a cute spot. Cubbi arrives and of course; he has his WOODEN SWORD OF PIN PRICKS and it annoys Sunni enough for her to screw up big time. A sign of a teenybopper diva: She cannot handle big pressure from annoying little children. Sunni and Grammi cannot take much more of this; so Grammi wants them to bake the bread while they clear the Quick Tunnels. See; this job can only be done properly by women and of course Gruffi blows it off because men are better. Remember what I said about stereotypical roles in DTVA before TaleSpin?! Here you go and it's on full display.
I'm going to have a headache ranting on this rant. Feminine Air did the same thing; but Rebecca had sympathy heat because Baloo was an irresponsible pilot. Rebecca's business sense isn't nearly as bad (despite her pig head business plans) as Baloo's slacking off and therefore she had sympathy when people were being sexist against her. I see none of it here. I see a bunch of self-centered bears trying to one up each other in the name of the sexes. Gruffi of course blows her off because men can do it faster and better. The poison is already in full effect in this episode as Grammi blows him off because talk is cheap. So violence is rich; is that a message to send to kids? Gruffi storms out as Zummi and Cubbi try to explain to Gruffi that this is pointless and it only allows Grammi to win. Even Grammi is calling it a success so you know it's a stupid plotline.
Thankfully; we head to Castle Dumbwin..ERRR....Castle Dunwyn as Sir Tuxford is preparing the horses in the courtyard along with King Gregor and Cavin to hunt for the wild boar from last night. Princess Calla is there (in her regular clothes which look not so royal; maybe Gregor's having a change in heart) asking to come with Gregor to check on the border markers. Gregor of course refuses because she's a princess and therefore she is a girl. Oh great! It's bad enough that the Gummi Bears are doing it; now the humans are doing it. This is going to be the first DUD episode in DTVA history; I just know it. Calla blows it off but Gregor gives her a warm hug in order to poison her into thinking that he's a sexist. Okay; he's concerned for her safety. At least Gregor's reasons for Calla not coming are justified. Sir Tuxford mounts up and rides as Sir Tuxford relates a story about how Gregor and Tuxford fought trolls tooth and nail as Gregor butters up Cavin which the fight lasts ten minutes. Memo to Gregor: If a fight against trolls lasts ten minutes in a RPG; the game sucks. Just so that you know. Cavin sells it like he's in heaven.
Everyone laughs because the king is lying. But Gregor is a fair king and no one gets beheaded or thrown in prison as a result. The horse riders (Cavin, Gregor and Tuxford) leave as the friar arrives with destroyed carriage of course tells the bad story of the wild boar destroying his life's work basically. Memo to human: The boar was only half the horse's size you lying scumbag! Princess Calla talks to Unwin about it (since Unwin is demoted to page after Cavin whipped his butt a few episodes ago.) and Unwin relates that the boar is in the northern borders where Gregor and company are headed. The crack Disney Caption Teams misses Unwin's name and your highness in the captions which is really lame even for them. Calla realizes this and must help them even if this is against their wishes. She goes to Gummi Glenn's kitchen as she explains the whole situation to Grammi and Sunni. Grammi unintentionally blows her off because Wild Boar=Gruffi. Okay; that was funny as Calla corrects her since it's a real boar which destroys wagons and terrorizes people; more or less. Hey; if I was intruding on the boar's property; I would be destroying their wagons too. Princess Calla is in a moral problem since she cannot go with Gregor and the Gummi Bears cannot tell them...However; Grammi has a MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN with that wink of hers and it's off into the Quick Tunnels as they are riding on the Quick Car which allows them to almost bowl over the GANG OF GUMMI WAY in the process. Gruffi blows them off because they are women and only know how to joyride. Oh god! If anyone thinks Baloo is a sexist; then you never met Gruffi..or the reverse sexist Grammi.
We head into the forest as Cavin, Tuxford and Gregor continue to ride their horses towards their destination to check on the safety of the borders. More false stories from Sir Tuxford and they involve a green giant this time around. Even Gregor is taken back by the height that Sir Tuxford lies right on cue judging by his long somber face. He's probably thinking that this episode sucks the meat missile with gusto. Oh wait; he's still on the LYING JUICE OF DOOM as he was battling his taller father since the shorter one was just a boy. And you thought Baloo's wild stories were bad. At least Baloo's stories sound remotely believable. This is like those fish stories people tell because they are really miserable people who have no excitement in their lives as human beings; so they make them up to amuse people. This is the worst of those examples. Cavin of course sells it like he's on the juice as well. We then see a woman who looks like Princess Calla hidden in a bad disguise with Grammi's face and a WOODEN STAFF OF DEATH. Oh wait...Never mind. The first MIMI JOKE PLAN is in full effect as they proclaim gloom and doom to the horse riders because there is a wild boar present. Tuxford no sells because they hunted boars since they were Cavin's size just to make sure that Cavin can relate to them in some way. Grammi Calla continue their warning of course because it's a dangerous and big boar that can MURDER anyone and the horse riders should leave at once. Tuxford and Gregor blow them off because they are lying to them more or less..and that they are men. Speak for yourself you lying lazybones!
The riders leave as even Cavin is having second thoughts about this beast. However; Gregor blows that off because his lying stories are law and therefore are true. Grammi's plan is popped out of the episode as they blow their cover and Sunni comes out of the bushes. Now they are going to have to find the boar before it finds them. Which is all well and good girls; but what do you do then?! They have no idea of course. See; this is why battle of the sexes plotlines don't work because the cultural differences and pride get in the way and therefore teamwork becomes non-existent. We head to a grass plain where the wild boar is hiding. We know this because we can see the body of the wild boar. I hope this guy gives me some entertainment because this short is becoming a write off for me now. The boar comes out as we hear Cavin and Gregor talking about hunting wild boars and Cavin sounds excited even though his acting sounds quite wooden even for him.
It's sad R.J. Williams was too young to do this role at this point; because his acting was awesome. We pan over to see Sir Tuxford and King Gregor sitting in front of the fire with the tent pitched up in the background while Cavin is preparing his wooden spear. Gregor warns him that they are dangerous; even small one and Cavin blows it off because Gregor is a great warrior. I think Gregor's finally getting punked out for lying here. Cavin throws the wooden spear and it lands right into the bushes as a grunting sound beckons which allows Gregor to tell Cavin to get behind them right on cue. Cavin gets behind them as Sir Tuxford and Gregor tells him to watch their technique as we get a small delay of bush rattling before the wild boar pounces out of the bushes right on cue...And Tuxford and Gregor run away like scalded dogs. Too freakin funny! I just love that spot. Gregor and Tuxford try to mount on the horses; but the wild boar scares them off like scalded dogs. I believe they are now officially screwed.
They run and grab Cavin dragging him away as the boar destroys the pink tent of course. Memo to future knights: Never pitch a pink tent in front of a wild boar...Or Stan Hansen. Sunni spots the boar from a lookout tree and calls down to Princess Calla and Grammi that they are coming this way of course. Calla wonders how they can save the men; so Grammi gives her the VIAL OF ROIDED JUICE to debut Calla's first crack on the roids. Calla drinks up and it's ROID RAGE TIME! Cavin, Tuxford and Gregor continue to run as Calla pushes onto a tree and that manages to squash the wild boar flatter than Alexander the Grape. Nice MAN-SIZED bump as we see the cowards running with Cavin looking like he wants to fight; but cannot. The girls bounce in victory; but the wild boar pushes the tree away with it's awesome power and Calla ready to knuckle up. The wild boar gets into position as Calla goes to the rock; but the juice wears off. Those Gummi's have got to find a way to make that juice last longer in humans. You...Forget it! I'm not going to waste my A material on this episode. Sunni and Grammi yell to her that the juice has worn off and run to that big oak tree.
Princess Calla sells it and runs away in a silly moment where the she's running right when the animation should have her running left. That sequence looked choppy for some reason. Grammi calls for Sunni to bounce that brute silly and they drink down their VIALS OF ROIDED JUICE...and it's BUTT BOUNCING TIME! Calla runs to the big oak and both Sunni and Grammi manage to bounce to her in time to bounce her high into the sky as the wild boar takes a MAN-SIZED bump into the tree. Well; the boar is entertaining me; I'll give this episode that much. The babyfaces stay in the tree as more MAN-SIZED bumps ensume from the boar. Cavin, Tuxford and Gregor continue to run like scalded dogs (with Cavin now running since he's got the message now) and they hide behind the bushes. Gregor and Tuxford don't see him as they both admit to Cavin that they were lying all along. See what happens when you fib? You get off death references like Gregor just did right there. Cavin decides to resign to the fate that they did the right thing like the cowards they are. If this is the template for Feminine Air; then Julia Jane Lewald is a very UN-PC writer as the boar continues to bash the oak tree which allows Grammi to slip and fall out of the tree for a bit before hanging onto a branch just about in hoof's reach of the wild boar. Grammi struggles with her legs kicking as the segment ends nearly seven minutes. Thank goodness there is only a little over three minutes left...
After the commercial break; we go back to the bushes as they hear Grammi yell for help and they take it as that is the old woman. Gregor decides that he's going to have to stand his ground if anyone is going to get out alive. Sunni and Calla help Grammi up as Gregor tells Cavin and Tuxford to run hide the rock. They sell and Gregor runs into the line of fire as the wild boar finally gets bored and decides to go after him. Well; I say, Gregor is actually a brave guy after all. Maybe he is a real man after all. Gregor goes for the tree as Grammi, Sunni and Call hide behind the tree. Gregor tries to climb up; but he slips down the tree trunk and is forced to dodge the charging wild boar. The wild boar slide on the ground creating a line hole on the ground as it gets boared up for another charge. Sunni has an idea and grabs the purple cover and throws it over the boar's eyes to distract him for a while. Grammi calls it a good shot as the cover wraps around his eyes like a magical force comes over it. Fuzzy cartoon logic is back from a vacation as Gregor is on his can so to speak and gets up and decides to run and join Cavin and Tuxford. What a...Oh wait; he's got a MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN as he refers to the escape of Chester's Camp. Tuxford remembers and calls it brilliant. Did lazybones ride the mechanical bull before doing this episode because I don't see any brilliance in running away from a blinded boar. I think even Cavin is taken back by this. Cavin's job is to grab the shawl as it falls off the wild boar's eyes right on cue. Sir Tuxford runs right while Cavin runs right into the line of fire which makes him the bravest being in the entire episode by default.
Cavin manages to grab the shawl from behind the wild boar (while it looks at the oak tree; while Calla asks Cavin to be careful); but the wild boar turns around and notices him. Cavin scatters away (Can you blame him? He's only 12 for crying out loud!) as the wild boar is chasing him. The quality of this DVD is starting to bother me now. Cavin runs to the rock and throws the shawl to Gregor and then scatters away. Gregor grabs it and gets into position as Cavin allows the wild boar to chase him in circles. Okay; this MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN might actually work. Gregor jumps down and rides on the wild boar like Cubbi riding on Loopy. The difference: The shawl is covering the wild boar's eyes. Princess Calla is impressed as this episode is actually improving by the moment. Gregor rides the boar and manages to turn it left before it falls into the river below. Excellent spot there that was done right by TMS. Gregor turns him left again back towards the range as Cavin calls for Gregor to hang on. Don't worry Cavin; he will...He must...The plan finally comes undone as Princess Calla cringes because Gregor and the boar are going over a cliff.
However; Sir Tuxford is hanging upside down on a tree branch about 20 feet away from the cliff and manages to grab Gregor just in time by the arms as the wild boar falls right into the cliff by itself into the river and it bops inside never to return ever again. At least Gregor hopes it does. Tuxford and Gregor give themselves a pat on the back for a job well done as Cavin proclaims that this will be an awesome story. Gregor blows it off because telling a lie is safer than living one. Cannot argue with that point; but still this contradicts the whole message that the woman can do this better than the men. Sure; they helped the men, but the men managed to stop the boar once Gregor hatched his plan. Therefore; Gruffi wins his point right there. Yeah; that's why the episode sucks I guess. Cavin and the men laugh it off of course as I'm annoyed by their laughing.
They head to the oak tree to at least thank the woman for warning them about the boar; but she's not up there anymore. Cavin notices the note stuck to the tree and pulls it down. Cavin reads the message saying thanks to them for saving them from the boar; but to take advice from old ladies more seriously. Tuxford decides that this is a good idea and even Gregor agrees to it in his own way as it's time to go home. We head back to the living room of Gummi Glenn as Grammi is sitting down in her rocking chair while Sunni gets her the tea kettle which is not painted black I should note. Sunni decides to pour some tea in a teacup for Grammi because they earned their rest today. Suuurrre you did Grammi. That allows the male Gummi Bears to enter and of course Gruffi instantly blows the ladies off for slacking off. Compared to the females; I think Gruffi wins this battle of the sexes because they actually did the hard work here. Grammi blows off Gruffi in kind as Gruffi scoffs at Grammi tea sipping. We head back to Castle Dunwyn as Sir Tuxford tells his tall tales about his adventures proving that Lazybones should still learn the fine art of believable storytelling.
Interesting Moment #1: My goodness; Sir Tuxford said murderous which is as close to murder as you can get. Of course; murder isn't allowed in anime pre Adult Swim era; but in a big surprise, Mister T started that in 1983 which is funny since bullet shooting guns were removed completely from Mister T's world. Tuxford even calls the beast blood thirsty which is another plus.
The public buys the story less they want to face the WRAITH OF GREGOR. One of the knights laughs it up and calls it a good story. And of the public basically picks his story apart because Tuxford doesn't lie here and everyone laughs including Unwin. Cavin tries to defend the knight's honor; but Gregor tells him to stand down because they'll never believe anything anyway. Cavin sezs that they have proof as he shows the shawl. Suuurrrreee; that'll clear Sir Tuxford's name as Princess Calla arrives and thinks the shawl is pretty. Gregor states that it came from a wise old lady and then he realizes that it's hers which Calla blows off because Gregor's imagination is running wild. Molly would lift that spot for Flight of The Snowduck it should be noted which I thought was funnier when Molly did it. Calla leaves as both Cavin and Gregor are dumbfounded as the episode ends mercifully at 10:39. A pretty good ending; but the episode on the whole was a real mess as they went from trying to prove that women can do it better than men and then watering down the message that women are merely useful. The result was a mixed message which made me cringe every time I saw Grammi try to make her look like a serious man and then showing how stereotypical she ended up...and it was the men who beat the boar; the women only helped in warning Gregor. * ¾ (35%)
THE REVIEW LINE
Talk about a major difference in episode quality; this was the ultimate in mixed shorts. Now Loopy Go Home was pretty good although it wasn't as good as Can I Keep Him due to several large logic breaks which was as a result of the episode having only 10 and a half minutes to work with. The Cubbi running away part was quite contrived sadly. However; it was made up by a great performance by Cubbi and a (much to my surprise) good performance by Gruffi. To be perfectly honest; I was on Gruffi's side as much as I like Cubbi because Cubbi basically rendered Loopy into a wuss by his pampering. However; near the end, Cubbi finally got it and decided to teach Loopy how to be wild which to me showed some mature moments from the boy. The ending was also the same thing when he let Loopy go despite Gruffi saying that he could officially keep him. It was a great moment and also it marked a time where morals and believable consequences could be possible in animation which made Disney's decision to have a television division worth while. Gummi Bears started it; Ducktales continued it and TaleSpin perfected it. Gargoyles then took drama beyond what could be done and still make it entertaining; if only they didn't piss it away in Chronicles and in some really bad episodes.
However; A-Hunting We Will Go was a roadblock in that quality as Disney's first attempt to talk about gender roles really fell flatter than a pancake. The writers really didn't know how to handle this episode as it went from a really bad version of Battle of The Sexes; to basically rendering the female gender as nothing more than helpers which contradicted everything the writers were trying to shoot for in this episode. They also attempted a subplot in Gregor/Tuxford's lying stories as an angle which was all right; but they looked like better heroes than I think the writers intended them to be. The animation and the boar sequences are pretty good and kept the episode from being a DUD; but in the end it was a below average episode and one of the worst in the series thus far. I bow to Julia Jane Lewald and apologize for saying that she was so PC in Feminine Air; because A-Hunting was far more so. Finally; I would like to apologize as Secret of the Juice is not going to be my 100th rant. It's going to be the shorts The Fence Sitter (another episode I remember all too well) and Night of the Gargoyle. The Secret of The Juice will be # 101. So....
Thumbs up for Loopy Go Home; thumbs down for A-Hunting We Will Go and I'll see you all next time.