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Gargoyles: Double Jeopardy
Reviewed: 09/15/2013
More Dumb Clones!
Well; now we have come to the old "clone" episode where Goliath must face off against a clone of himself who has TNA's naming schemes. Yeah; that is so easy to mock for me. So; let's rant on shall we...?!
This episode is written and story edited by Cathy Bates. Animation is done by Animal-Ya and Morning Sun.
Opening Moment #1: We recap Awakening Part Five with the gargoyles destroying all of the Goliath look-a-like robots and then some footage from Metamorphosis which only serves to prove that Doctor Severius has returned from the "dead".
We begin this one with a shot of Castle Wyvern AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) as we get a subtitle saying that this event took place one year ago. We get a zoom in shot towards a entrance and then a hallway and then inside a room with the Steel Clan under the cover, except for one who looks cloaked and sure enough he revives and has his green scanners on looking for a ceiling to break. Now for an obvious logic break: This is taking place while Thrill Of The Hunt is going on. This goes on when Eliza and Goliath are talking about finding a new home; which at no time did we see Goliath fighting a Steel Clan robot. It always ends with Goliath leaving uninjured and not even attacked. Here; the robot comes up and attacks Goliath; slashing him in the arm as we start a tradition of showing wounds with red marks; but no blood comes out which is dumb considering the amount of blood we have seen in this series already! Goliath squashes the robot and it's head by stomping his head on the ground; which brings Owen in with the first aid kit (BS&P alert: The Red Cross is there for all to see). Owen calls this a freak load in the power matrix and before they can take the robot offline it went crazy. Owen has a bottle of pink liquid and a Q-tip as he proclaims that the slash wound needs to be tended too; which even Eliza agrees with because they shouldn't take stupid risks. Wait; where have I learned that lesson before? Oh yeah; Stormy Weather, TaleSpin. I'm just saying fans. Owen brushes pink stuff onto Goliath's wounds and Goliath roars violently as it begins a literal downpour. This proves to be a segue way to the winding road we were on in the last rant with Eliza driving her red car while Lexington and Broadway are flying overhead with Lex on headphones. They exchange notes on a power plant melting down and being glad to not take a stupid risk like that. Then Lex and Broadway get attacked from behind by some purple like gargoyle as the mature lighting in this is awesome here. Eliza is still on the bug microphone as Lex gets his ankle snagged and thrown down as the headphones come off.
Eliza continues to try to get a response from Lex; but then the purple gargoyle like creature tries to run her off the road; but only succeeds in pushing it against the side barricade. Eliza stops and gets out of her car as Lex and Broadway come out and we see an eastern pan shot of the purple gargoyle like creature and it looks like in the rapid flicker of light from the thunderstorm...Goliath? Eliza is in shock as the gargoyle hear Keith David's laugh in full; indicating that it might be Goliath turning heel. YAY! Okay; maybe not as we head to Gen-U-Tech labs as we head to Doctor Severius' office as we see him with a new haircut giving some black guy with red shades and green armor on $50,000 to do some kind of grand theft stuff. The man plays with the money and proclaims that they can lift the Venus De Milo out of the Louvre. That sounds awfully vulgar! The green armor dude thinks that this would be easier at night; but Doctor Severius proclaims that it wouldn't be the case and tells him to trust him on that. So we head to the clock tower as Eliza is exchanging notes with Hudson on the thunderstorm and Hudson is certain that is not the Goliath he knows. Broadway blows it off and wants Goliath to explain his own actions. Eliza asks where Goliath is and Hudson states that he and Brooklyn are on patrol and it's almost daybreak anyway as the clouds are rolling out. Hudson thinks that they found a place to sleep the gargoyle sleep and as the sun rises the gargoyles turn to stone as Eliza looks worried as ever. So then we cut to the perch of Castle Wyvern and see....Goliath? Really?! We then see Owen and David Xanatos looking on as David proclaims that he's glad to be working for us. In other words; Goliath has turned on the clan! Or has he?! The problem with this is; if Brooklyn is with Goliath, then he would know where Goliath really was; but there is no sign of Brooklyn on the perch. So David and Owen walk into the castle as Owen talks about the Emir having problems meeting with David's deadlines. Well; that is what happens when you are a demanding psychopathic CEO guys!
Then David hears something from afar and it's the sound of a helicopter as both Owen and David run out and we see a helicopter over the perch where "Goliath" is and some green armored thieves grab the statue and wrap it with ropes. Logic break: When the thieves go to a far shot and go up the helicopter to reel the statue in; the ropes are completely gone; but they are shown on the closeup shot. Bad, bad form there Animal-Ya! We see Owen putting his hand on a brick panel and the wall opens to reveal a laser gun. He grabs it and aims at the helicopter; but David waves it off because he doesn't want the gargoyle to be damaged in any way. The gargoyle is reeled into the helicopter as it goes away. Owen asks who would do this and David thinks it might be Demona, Macbeth or Renard; which is stupid in a way because it implies that FOX could be behind this! Why?! Anyhow; David does the closeup of his mouth which is a tell tale sign that the animators are way too cheap at this point to animate anything in a sensible manner. David swears payback as we see the green armored dude with the red shades on flying the helicopter as Doctor Sevarius is on the monitor and in a lime green background wearing blue shoulder pads. Huh? Anyhow; Seva wants the dude to bring the gargoyle at the final point at night and then cuts the line dead. The armored dude proclaims that Seva gives him the creeps. He does have a point there; since his fake death gave my both the creeps and outrage at the end of the day. And speaking of the end of the day; we head back to the clock tower AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) to see Goliath and Brooklyn return from their patrol; thus proving that Goliath was not at Castle Wyvern. We head inside as Goliath is with the clan and has no idea what Hudson is talking about with this heel childish pranks that he does. Hudson asks if he knows how to laugh like a monster heel which is the dumbest question I have ever heard; as Eliza claims that they saw him and heard him. Brooklyn points out that this is "unpossible" since Brooklyn was with Goliath the entire time and was patrolling the mid town only. The babyfaces wonder who was attacking them...
...and so we head back to that winding road and in the background, we see an oil rig as the helicopter arrives and places the crate onto the helicopter circle. The grunts stand guard as GAD notices Doctor Sevarius wearing a blue sweater for no reason whatsoever, and he has a tranquilizer gun in his hands. GAD blows him off for using something on a statue and Seva tells him that he will now as night finally falls completely and the crate breaks open to reveal a purple Goliath with white hair which assures us that it isn't Goliath who growls and that ends the segment eight and a half minutes in. This is a good episode thus far with some crappy logic breaks.
After the commercial break; we head back to the winding road to a spot that wasn't even close to where the "Goliath" creature stood (it was much farther than that when we first saw him. Another logic break.) as Broadway, Lexington, Eliza show Goliath the "spot" where they saw him. Lexington notices a ring tracking device which is the Gen-U-Tech trademark signature device. Lexington claims that the creature must be a genetically modified creature and makes zero mention of the Mutates from Metamorphosis. Damn; even this show hates that episode now! Goliath orders Lexington and Broadway to pay Gen-U-Tech labs a little visit and they fly off west as we continue to see the oil rig in the background. Eliza deduces that David Xanatos is behind this as we scene change back to Castle Wyvern and in David's private office as David is at his desk while Owen comes in; and the phone rings. Owen answers the phone and then tells David that it's the phone call he was expecting. David puts the phone on speaker and there is a distorted voice on the phone (it's clearly Doctor Sevarius) as he wants David to come alone at 2 am on an oil rig near Blackrock Point with 20 million dollars; or there is no more "Goliath" to be seen again. This is a segue to David packing the suitcase with money as Owen is at a computer trying to research the phone call. David is not amused that the caller didn't stay on for three seconds. Owen discovers that while he couldn't trace the call; Owen knows the lease on the oil rig which David thinks is the Cyberbiotics scam; but Owen claims it's from Xanatos Enterprises. David is not surprised at all; and proclaims that Sevarius is behind this because he's the only one with intimate knowledge of the Thailog project. And yes; Thailog is Goliath spelled backwards which is funny since TNA tried that with Rellik which is Killer spelled backwards; and he was the worst jobber TNA ever had. And that is saying something since the only win I know from him was during the infamous Silent Night, Bloody Night match in 2007. Oh lord; that made Bryan Alaverez and Vinny Vanteli lose their crap big time.
David proclaims that he doesn't like losing a brilliant mind as he reveals that Sevarius' first name is Anton. However; he cannot tolerate this behavior and an example must be made of him as he shuts the suitcase full of money. So we head to Gen-U-Tech labs as we head inside Seva's library with Broadway breaking through the ceiling and both he and Lexington hop down. Lexington notices a nearby computer and starts fiddling around with it. He notices that there are way too many files on the computer and he'll have to narrow down the search. Lexington ponders it over and types in Clone; which Broadway manages to get right with only a second of pause to get it right. On the computer is a logbook of the Thailog project which we see B&W footage of Goliath fighting with the steel clan robot and then getting slashes in the arm. The date indicates that this was November 15th, which is four days after Temptation. So the logic break at the beginning has been popped out of the episode! Lovely! We see B&W footage of Owen rubbing the liquid with the Q-tip into the injured arm as Seva narrates that the liquid is really an agent to gather living DNA cells from Goliath's body. Yeah; the whole incident was staged by David Xanatos and Doctor Sevarius. Then more B&W footage; this time on January 4th which would be before Metamorphosis which makes no sense because David pointed out that he didn't have samples at the time. We discover through the B&W footage that Seva has created a clone of Goliath in a chamber similar to the chambers found in Dragon Ball Z used by Goku and Vegeta several times to revive themselves. We also discover that Seva was able to get it fully grown in 19 weeks despite having odd discoloring and pigmentation. I'm not going to bother posting dates here because the logic is wonky at this point on that front; other than they are dates Greg Weismon remembers as important to him.
Anyhow; the last B&W footage shows Thailog alive and well on the perch as Seva narrates that it's time to leave the nest and see the world through the slant of David Xanatos' worldview point; as indicated in the subliminal education program Sevas gave to Thailog. This sounds like something I was doing for the Dreamflyers Saga of my aborted fanfic series Aerostars with Baloo. Broadway proclaims that this is bad news and Lexington states that you can say that again as we cut to outside the building and Broadway sezs it again. Now just imagine Broadway looking like Patrick Star and the whole character just writes itself. So we head to the skies as Goliath swoops down in front of Eliza as neither one has a lead yet. Goliath asks about the oil rig and Eliza claims that it's abandoned; but then notices a power boat riding towards it with David Xanatos driving it. So we cut to on-board as David climbs onto the deck with the suitcase and out of the shadows comes Doctor Sevarius wearing a SWANK blue sweater claiming that David is playing this blood money stuff to the hilt. David puts the suitcase down on something and Seva wants him to open it up and let him see. So David opens the suitcase and Seva is giddy about the money because he has never seen a $10,000 bill. Then David proclaims that he is not normally a vengeful man as he takes off the trench coat to reveal his Red Goliath suit and grabs Seva by the neck and smashes him against the wall. Seva gets to be David's exception for a change. We see Goliath with Eliza in his arms flying over to the oil rig and Eliza looks down and wonders why Seva and David are at each others throats. Goliath proclaims that he will leave them to themselves for a bit because he wants to look inside. So he goes around back as Seva asks what he did wrong as David accuses him of extortion, treason and stealing Thailog more or less. Then for no reason; Seva thinks they are being watched and he goes into melodramatic acting like he admits his betrayal to him because he was only getting back his ultimate achievement. He whispers to David asking for his approval and David is just stunned. Yeah; that made no sense to me neither David.
So we see Goliath and Eliza land in the back as they hear noises. Why does Goliath continue to call this oil rig; an oil tanker? I don't get it?! So Goliath notices a porthole and opens it to go inside what appears to be a cell containing Thailog who has a SWANK blue loin cloth which indicates that Seva created him. Goliath notices him and completely rejects him as he is pissed now because David Xanatos is taking pieces of his soul after David stole his own home. I see the term property rights are still a huge problem with this gargoyle. Eliza is in shock as Goliath claims that it is him and she swore in DUBBED ANIME STYLE? After all the times I have heard Batman, Kit Cloudkicker and Don Karnage say "Oh my God!"; they are still doing that crap? I mean; if you are going to be a response to Batman; at least learn how to speak properly when you take God's name in vain. Goliath appears to want to hurt Thailog; but Eliza stops him to point out that taking it out on Thailog is pointless because Thailog is pretty much a gargoyle as is Goliath. Goliath admits that Eliza has a point and David Xanatos is to blame as Thailog unshackles himself in the confusion and tackles Goliath down to the ground and brings out the out of nowhere respirator and covers Goliath's mouth with it. He admitted that the shackles were unlocked to begin with as he apparently pumps knockout gas into Goliath's mouth and Goliath is knocked out cold. Eliza is on the ground demanding answers to this outrage as Thailog proclaims that he is more of a gargoyle than Goliath will ever be and then does the evil villain laugh as he stalks Eliza against the wall and that ends the segment 14 minutes in. Well; that was really good as Thailog is actually a really fun character to watch so far and proving that heel Keith David is better than babyface Keith David.
After the commercial break; we see the water ripple and then head to the oil rig as David still has Seva by the blue sweater (HOW DARE HE?) as he asks why Seva thinks this is all just an act. Seva explains that he got letters from him from e-mail to arrange for the entire ordeal from the thievery to the ransom letter. Seva claimed that he got the orders from David Xanatos himself. Seva claims that he assumed that this subterfuge was part of Machiavellian scheme against his enemies. David proclaims that he assumed incorrectly and drops Seva on his ass in the process. Nice bump from Seva as David then realizes that it had to be their child gargoyle test subject as he was a chip off the old block; and then Thailog swoops in and sticks a disc like weapon onto the suit of David and it shocks him down to the ground. David's vision gets blurry on the FPS shot as Seva just sits there in mortal fear as Thailog talks about being a cut off many blocks as David has GTS'ed. And we fade to black; because even this series is not safe from Michael Eisner's turn on. So we head inside the cell as Goliath is chained down like a dog while the rest are chained up like Kit, Wildcat and Baloo in Captains Outrageous. Sadly; no Tiger Claws are involved. Sad; because Thailog doing it to them would have been fun to watch. Anyhow; David has somehow awaken and we exchange notes as Thailog only wanted to get the $20 million in ransom money just to be a big spender; but not under David's terms because he is through being David and Seva's little animal to use as a pawn in their schemes. Lovely. So this conversation goes on for a long ass whomping time as it's clear that Thailog is basically Goliath, David and Seva combined together. Goliath tries to convince Thailog to join his clan which Thailog actually entertained the thought (to show that he has Goliath's personality); but since Goliath has disappointed him since Goliath is not in it for profit and is being a guardian angel; he now officially hates him. There is a cute part where Seva blows off Thailog and Thailog gets into his face and tells him not to tempt him. That was great.
Thailog then goes over to Eliza and acts like a gentlemen to him proclaiming that she was just in the wrong place at the wrong time; and even feels sad for her. Seva has no idea what he is talking about; so David yells at him that this all means that they are all going to die and Seva is confused by this. Thailog proclaims that he searched the abandoned oil rig and found 200 million barrels of oil topside. So he's going to flood the platform with crude oil and then set it on fire with the out of nowhere flare gun. I see he was watching TaleSpin and Ducktales while scheming this one up. Seva asks how he is going to use that money and does the "walk into a bank and open an account" card and Thailog states that he'll find a way since he found a way to defeat all three of his dads. He laughs and simply walks out as he shuts the porthole. So Seva is struggling with his cuffs; but getting nowhere while Eliza is also struggling; but then uses the NARROW LIMB TRICK OF DOOM to get through the handcuffs; ala Kit Cloudkicker squeezing through prison bars in A Bad Reflection On You Part Two. David claims that he likes a woman with delicate wrists. THAT'S SEXIST~! I was hoping that Eliza would punch David in the face for that comment; but it doesn't happen. BOO! HISS! Eliza talks about her tricks with handcuffs as she helps Goliath break the chains; but that fails because according to Seva; the gas he created to knock Goliath out would make him weak and helpless for hours on end. Goliath tells Eliza to save herself; but Eliza no sells because she refuses to let him die with two of Thailog's dads. David proclaims that the disc on his armor has shorted out his armor and therefore he is helpless; and then Seva gets the LIGHT BULB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY and realizes that the disc would be their salivation as long as it holds a charge still. Eliza goes over and takes the disc off of David's suit as Eliza isn't sure about this; while Goliath is selling being tired from the chain yanking earlier claims that they have no choice in the matter as we head outside to see Thailog ripping open barrels of oil for fun and pours the oil onto the rig as he hears Goliath screaming in the background.
Thailog claims that he must have gotten his temper from Goliath as we head inside to see Goliath in pain as the disc is shocking him and the gas seems to be offset and the chains are pulled from the wall successfully. Then we scene change to Goliath opening the porthole and all the tweeners and Eliza follow him out. Eliza notices the oil on the deck and claims that Thailog wasn't kidding in wanting to set the place on fire like a Roman candle which would only take one spark to set it off. David points out that his motorboat is docked on the harbor as Goliath wants to stay on the rig which Eliza doesn't want him too. Why? So he can save his "son" Thailog from himself; silly! Because Thailog is of Goliath's blood see. Which is really stupid because Goliath never gave informed consent to have a blood son; clone or no clone. He just wants to play hero and stop Thailog from acting like a psychopath; that's all. So we scene change to Thailog pouring more oil from the slashed oil barrels and it's obvious that we are going to do the exact same finish from Leader Of THE PACK~ with the oil rig exploding which is basically a dramatic version of an oil tanker going up in flames in Water Way To Go in Darkwing Duck! So Goliath appears on top of the crane and pleas for Thailog to end this because it's not too late to wipe the slate clean and start over. Thailog claims that this is over his dead body as he brings out the flare gun; so Goliath swoops in and tackles down Thailog which sounds awfully vulgar to me. The suitcase gets dropped in an empty oil barrel which was previously slashed open by Thailog. Judging by the size; it might be the top for all I know. So we push towards the edge as Goliath tries to grab the flare gun; or at least have it point up, but a moment of fatigue manages to allow Thailog to shoot the flare gun right at the oil and we have a fire starting again. So we got an oil tanker, Macbeth's first house (and almost his second house), King Duncan with the flames burning inside him, Castle Moray and now an oil rig. Six episodes with that spot. Someone is a pyromaniac in creative it seems.
So we get the closeup of them because Animal-Ya cannot animate a fight to save their lives as we see the motorboat (which has changed color scheme since we last saw it) riding away from the oil rig as we see Seva and Eliza watching the chaos and Eliza is saying oh no in the most contrived manner possible as the motorboat turns around for no reason. So we head back to the flaming oil rig as Goliath looks around and notices Thailog somehow in the background looking for something. Goliath pleas for him to come to the water as this is his only chance. Thailog no sells because he is looking for the suitcase and finds it as apparently; all the oil around the suitcase (which is in the top part of the oil barrel Thailog slashed open) is gone. Lovely logic break there guys! Thailog grabs the suitcase and then we get a confusing chain of events which ends with Goliath getting hit in the entire body with exploding flame and instead of burning him to ashes and his death; he takes the stuntmen bump into the water below. Damn; I thought this show was above such crap. That is so live action movie like explosion. I'm guessing Thailog was caught in the flames as well because they show him getting incinerated (I think) as we cut back to the back of the motorboat as Eliza puts her head in her hands and she cannot even be bothered to show any emotion in this. Damn; even R.J. Williams does a better job than this. David goes over to console her and then Goliath pops up from the water and Eliza shoves David's arm away and tells him to save it. Save what Eliza? If it was his pity; that would imply that he had sympathy for you. Answer: He really doesn't....much. Goliath swims to the motorboat and climbs aboard as David goes over to a storage bin to get something from it as he proclaims that the copy didn't live up to the original which Goliath blows off because he was a living being and they all failed him. Seva is not happy at all as he sees Broadway and Lexington land on the motorboat asking what they missed and Eliza claims that they missed everything. Lexington claims that they now know a lot about Thailog and Eliza counters that as well as we see the oil rig blazing; but it doesn't get destroyed and that is that.
So we head to Castle Wyvern in the morning as we see David on the grounds sitting at a white table having tea alone. Owen comes along and claims that the $20 million went up in smoke and could have been the money used to create an improved security system. David is not amused; but he asks Owen if he knows that it went up in smoke because if he were in Thailog's shoes he would have a backup plan to get off the oil rig and fly away with $20 million dollars to spend. This leads to the closing moments of this episode with these quotes:
Owen:
You mean that creature is still out there; it has the money, it's as
powerful as Goliath...and it's smarter than you?
David:
Owen, I think I created a monster. (And when
David was saying this; he goes over to the ramparts and bows his head
down in shame and sounds like he has true remorse for what he caused.
Even being a sociopath; he has some feeling of remorse even if it
gets pissed away in the end.)
And the closing shot shows an afterimage of Thailog laughing in his face which is actually better than the same spot they did with Shere Khan and Whistlestop Jackson in Whistlestop Jackson, Legend because Thailog is actually animated and Whistlestop was not. Anyhow; that closing shot ends the episode at 21:17 approx. A great episode marred by animation mistakes and a really too complex way to get Thailog to get $20 million dollars. **** (80%).
THE REVIEW LINE
I really liked this episode for the most part. I felt the storyline was well told even though the whole plan was a wee bit too complex to follow and some of it made no sense and without the different dates (which were just there as a Greg Weismon trademark); there would have been a logic break. I love Thailog here because I always wondered what we would get if Goliath/David/Seva had a baby and this was the result. We got a pyromaniac with a system to ponder over which makes the decision making even more psychotic on his part. The only thing I don't like about Thailog is that he is extremely petty and I felt that stealing $20 million dollars seems kind of pointless with that mind and body. I also did like Eliza's acting at the end; I felt it was contrived and some of Animal-Ya's animating in the fights was almost like Outfoxed in that they looked cheap as hell with various mistakes. Still; I enjoyed this episode and I came out loving Thailog; although I would have loved it more if he wasn't so petty. Sadly; we won't see him again until about three episodes into the Volume 2, Part 2 DVD set (only at Disney Store and DMC); and he works for Demona in Paris. Yeah; that cannot end well for either one of them. So next up is Upgrade which ends disc two of this volume with the clan VS. THE PACK~ in a fight for Fox and David's amusement. Oooo; goody, this will be fun. So....
Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you all next time.