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Cat's Entertainment
Reviewed: 02/12/2017
Little Max Blue And The Man On The Loon!
So after going after some gold; Goofy decides to trust Pete into taking care of Waffles, which allows Pete to put him in commercials, because Pete's a sleazebag bastard who's likes to make a quick buck. Nothing changes, I guess. So how does this episode fare? Let's rant on shall we...?!
This episode is written by Dennis Melonas and Dean Stefan, whom also story edited. I have nothing on Dennis except he might be a book writer and not much else. The animation was provided by Kenndy Cartoons, Inc. with the additional services done in Manila.
We begin this one with a Garfield style title letters and then pan over from Pete's house to Goofy's house as Goofy has a balance beam over the side of the house. Goofy is in cyan blue overalls and wearing a blue shirt and cyan blue cap painting the side of the house. Kennedy drew that poorly, by the way. In runs Chainsaw as Goofy talks about even strokes being the best paint strokes. Chainsaw sniffs the ground and digs a hole under one of the supports; causing Goofy to spring and fling upside down. In comes Max as Goofy asks what he is up to. Max claims that PJ is visiting grandma's house; so Max is going to play in the park with Chainsaw. Goofy suggests bringing Waffles; whom is lying down on the brick wall separating the two properties. Max blows it off because cats suck the fun by just lying down. Waffles sighs as we pan west to Pete's front yard as Pete has the garage door open and is spray painting orange stuff on a metal frame of a lawn chair. Pete puts the spray can on the table as Peg is out shopping, the kids are kidding around as there is a lot of kicking off football as Pete uses the remote and turns on a game of football on the air. The sports announcer as the game is interrupted by a catnose with brown curly hair and wearing earrings in her hair (voiced by Jodi Carlisle I do believe) as there is bad news on the horizon. Does this mean, Goof Troop is ending? Nah; unpossible since that would mean the tediousness of the show would be over. I'm sorry; but once Wade Barrett was Bad News Barrett; the promo of bad news cannot be topped. Pete grumbles about this as we cut to a tiger striped cat who looks like Garfield is holding a flower. He's addressed as the beloved star of food commercials named Horace the cat. Oh; and he's dead, done, toe-tagged, and lying on the bed dead for all to see. Geez; I thought that sort of thing was too graphic to show on the news. Pete blows off the cat because he believes cats are lazy. Geez; talk about projecting that one, Pete Pete. Jump cut to Horace tap-dancing and twirling a top hat on stage in archive footage on television as the newsreporter claims that Horace was in a commercial for Chockful of Mackerel. The annnouncer claims that he will be solely missed. Yeah; I'll bet. Pete scoffs at this as we jump cut to outside the arena with a dogear with a lot of greyness clashing with the pink suit and red pants holding a cane. The reporter informs us that his name is Admiral Carp, the owner of the Chockful of Mackerel company.
The reporter asks for his reaction and he is heartbroken and sobbing openly on camera. Poor guy; he lost his only real friend in the world and now we have to see him in the most tedious show in the land. He just cannot buy a break. And then he stops selling; grabs the microphone and proclaims that auditions are at noon for his replacement. Okay; I have no emotional attachment to Hoarce; but screw you Mr. Carp! Not only is this scoiopathic behavior; it's also encouraging characters like Nosedive in thinking that these spots are cool when they are not. Pete continues to spray and scoff; until the reporter proclaims that the winning cat in the audition will be one rich kitty. Pete gets the LIGHT BULB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY as Waffles yawns in the background. The sports announcer returns the show to normal as we never got to hear the reporter's name as we get a third down and a fourth down and twenty five at the same time. One of the football players is named Roy Wilson, who does storyboards for DTVA on a regular basis right around this time. Surprisely; Kennedy Cartoons doesn't even try to give Pete dollar signs in his eyes. Pete ponders it over for a while and turns around with cats in his eyes as he wuv kitty cats...for him to abuse with! By the way; spraying an animal with spray paint, even if non-toxic is a heel move worse than dressing them in clothes. As Jay Leno would say: YOUR DOG IS NOT GOING TO WEAR THAT~! Come to think about it; Horace might be inspired by Heathcliff; who is a knockoff of Garfield, by the way. Ah; there's the dollar signs in eyes moment not even three minutes in. Pete walks over and grabs Waffles; acting like a douche in the process. Pete is about to bail; but Goofy shows up to greet Pete anyway. Pete claims that he was inspecting Waffles and claims that he doesn't look all that well. So he shows "evidence" by shining light into Goofy's eyes with his watch. Apparently; brighty-eyed and bushy-tailed are bad signs. You don't say?! So Waffles needs to see the vet and Goofy offers to no longer do the painting of the side house; however, Pete wants to take him to the vet as a favor. Goofy walks away stage right buying it hook, line and sinker; because Goofy is a stupid idiot. Pete goes into his car with Waffles and spray paints Waffles orange off-screen as Waffles screeches and claws at the back window as Pete takes the car out of the driveway into the street. Pete's driving continues to suck as he bangs into trash cans. Huh.
Jump cut to inside the car at the front seat with Waffles purring viciously at Pete for whatever reason as we segueway jump cut to Carp giving the hook to various dancing cats; including an exact clone of Horace in his office. Pete finally goes up as the hook teases hooking Waffles; but Carp accepts Waffles cart-blanche and that is that. Yeah; Carp has a perfect clone of Horace and rejected him; but Waffles looks nothing like Horace and Carp accepts him. Talk about not caring about making sure this makes sense there, Dennis. Carp walks over and holds Waffles, declaring him his new star as Waffles likes this at least. I have a feeling Carp would have accepted him even if he wasn't spray painted, because he's dumber than even Goofy Goof. Pete grabs Waffles and there is orange spray paint on Carp's suit shoulders as the miserable bastard asks how much he is going to make from this. Carp goes into his cat cell phone which doubles as an accounting ticker. That was cool at least as Pete's cut is $200,000; as Pete stammers like a stupid idiot and hugs Carp. EWWWWW! GET HIM AWAY! GET HIM AWAY! Carp basically tells Pete the same thing I'm yelling at as Pete will get his cut as soon as he checks out the cat's home environment. Pete stammers like an idiot because, why? Carp claims that he's doing this to make sure Waffles is a pampered kitty. Carp asks if Waffles is a pampered kitty and I would say.....ummmm...yes. In his own way though. Pete claims that they pamp Waffles all the time as he puts a baby soother in Waffles' mouth and Waffles spits it out like a poison dart. Scene change to a sky shot of Pete's residence as Pete's car stops in the driveway. The door opens and Waffles comes out looking dizzy as Goofy comes over and looks really concerned about this. Pete comes in to inform him that he's so awful and orange that Waffles cannot live with Goofy anymore. I call raw BS on that one, Pete. Waffles is allergic to yellow paint on the house with a quackery disease like pigmentosis-eelio-scleosis; which is clearly a fake disease, which sadly works because Goofy is supposed to be stupid in storyline. Goofy collided off-screen into cans of yellow paint during this, probably because Pete smacked him in the back, again. There is a lot of that in this series as Goofy wants to paint the house green instead as Pete is slammed a paint can on his head after Goofy pops one. Pete claims that green makes it worse; not unlike saying that diluting it makes it stronger. Uh-huh.
Apparently; red and purple aren't as bad; but still bad enough because Pete doesn't believe in that "dose is the poison" stuff as Goofy suggests vermillion as a color. Apparently; Waffles is allergric to every color of Goofy's house as Goofy is see-sawing himself to get the paint bucket off his foot. At this point; anyone with an IQ of eight and over would have seen this coming; but Goofy's IQ is in the negative range here and it's time to sell. Oh and he's not allergic to chartreuse and Pete deduces that no one is stupid enough to live in that color of a house. Of course not; because chartreuse is French liqueur. See; it's okay to say alcohol products; you cannot be seen drinking them or showing them. Goofy crashes into a heap of paint products next to the wall off-screen as Pete proclaims that Waffles won't be leaving with strangers, and he'll live with him. Doesn't Pete realize that strangers are less dangerous than people you do know? Goofy proclaims that he doesn't deserve a pal like him and I cannot tell if he's insulting himself or Pete on that exchange. Roller bops him in the face as Pete brings out a piece of rolled up paper and gives Goofy a pen to sign him up. Goofy asks what he is signing and Pete claims that he owns Waffles...ERRR...I mean, Pete is temporarily taking care of him. Pete bails with Waffles just as Max comes in with a helmet and red knee pads on a skaterboard; and asks why Pete is taking Waffles. Goofy sniffs, saying that Waffles is allergic to them as Goofy hugs Max in a really silly way as he takes the blame for painting the house yellow. Max is like "what the hell this is crap?!" which I have been asking myself since working on this episode. Goofy sobs and we end the segment with Max shrugging at the seven minute mark. You know; this really sucks so far and outside of an actual cat death, there is literally nothing happening other than Waffles being abused by Pete for money. I just cannot get behind that plot device, I really cannot.
After the commercial break; we head to a sky shot inside Pete's living room with Pete sitting on his easy chair with Waffles sleeping on top of the rim of said chair. Waffles is chomping his chompers as Pete calls him a hairy woodpecker and tells him to back off. Good luck on that, Pete; even Mother Nature isn't going to silence that waste of furballs. Waffles meows, jumps on the arm rest, bops Pete in the nose with it's tail before jumping down; as we jump cut to a shot of the door opening to reveal Peg and Pistol after a shopping trip. They head inside as Peg sniffs the air and proclaims that Waffles smells. Are you sure it's a legit cat and not Pete's legit scam? Pete grabs the can and makes a felonous insulting joke about cats digging out of the trash all day and smelling. The fact that the family is made of catnose; the irony is completely and utterly lost on Pete Pete. Pistol laughs, Peg mock laughs and screams at Pete to give Waffles. Wait; so Peg knows who Waffles is, but acts like she knows that Pete signed a contract. Wait; what?! Waffle screeches and scratches Pete's head good; which wasn't very good at all. Scene change to Max reading books about cats. Oh lord; being a 1990's kid meant giving Al Khan as many heart attacks as humanly possible; because it destroys his worldview that kids don't read, you see. We zoom out as Goofy is going to paint the living room judging by the amount of tarp; which is positioned badly throughout the house. Anyhow; Max is sitting on the sofa pointing out that there is nothing in the book that explains Waffles' so-called condition. Is Max implying that Pete has kidnapped Waffles for personal gain? Ummmmmmmm...yip. Goofy doesn't mind that because all they have to do is paint the house lime neon green; because the execs thinks that and chateruse are the same color. They are clearly not as paint splooshes into Goofy's face. Max still think something fishy is going on. I agree; it's Pete giving Waffles a bath and thinking that is a good idea; because you see, in the stereotype cat think, cats hate water which is a huge falsehood in itself. So we jump cut to Pete trying to get Waffles into a bathtub of water in the bathroom...and Waffles goes in and...likes it? Oh! Dennis did something right. YAY! Peg comes in with a scrub brush and gives it to Pete as Pete grumbles because he has to scrub Waffles' back. I'm having an impossible time accepting Peg accepting Waffles being spray painted orange. It makes no sense at all.
Pete insults Waffles again right in front of Peg as Peg invokes the frowny face; but we cut away before she can scream at him again. Jump cut to inside the living room with Goofy painting the walls slime green while on a step ladder. More promos about even strokes being good folks when painting. Too bad his IQ doesn't deal with even strokes. In comes Max invoking the LEGAL HAND OF GOD and of course; Goofy loses his balance and crashes onto the floor off the ladder and a bucket of lime green paint is dunked on his head. Geez; what now?! Max shows the book claiming that Waffles cannot be allergic to the color of the house because Waffles is color blind. Never mind that greyscale is a color; and cats are only partially color blind, like dogs, so they can make out some colors like blue and green. Green was one of the colors Goofy wanted to paint as a sub by the way. Goofy claims that Waffles probably didn't read that book; which is probably for the best because the writer should know better than this. Max whines as Goofy concedes that Pete is up to something as we jump cut to Pete scrubbing Waffles while Peg is barking directions about shampoo and conditioner use. Pete is also whining because his fingers are turning into prunes. The door slams opens and in comes Pistol being hyper and informing us that Mr. Carp is at the door, but it's a stranger and she doesn't answer to strangers. She looked through the peephole to ID the guy as Carp has a funny mustache. By the way; there is about two frames of animation in Peg's face that make her eyes completely disappear during this as Peg has the Gruffi pose wanting to know who Carp is. So Peg doesn't know Pete's scheme? Why doesn't that surprise me? More scrubbing complete with lying about Carp buying a used RV which somehow; Waffles can partially walk on water in one shot. Pistol of course points out that Carp wants Waffles, plain as day. Pete grabs Waffles to dry him and claims that Carp meant caddie. Oh; and there's the converted 1973 Cadillac they got in together. I'm pretty sure it came from 1986 and was rusted to death. Waffles is fuzzy as the doorbell rings some more and Pete bails to answer it bringing up the RV again because he's a lying piss ant. Peg is not convinced; but that was more convincing than Pistol's mouth before Peg claimed that the lung nut is up to something. Pete answers the door; by having Mr. Carp slam the door into Pete and Pete slams into the wall; while Carp greets him.
Geez; I wonder how Bubsy knew about this spot?! Pete pops from the door claiming that he's fine as Carp blows him off because he wants to know if Waffles is fine. Pete shhs him after getting poked in the cane and then Pete catches himself. Pete claims that Waffles is upstair just after a bath and Carp looks upstairs and there is Peg watching. We then get a nonsensical spot of Pete yelling like crazy as Carp is irritated by this screaming; so that makes most critics actually. Pete claims that Waffles was running like crazy today while still screaming. I cannot tell if Pete is screaming; or Carp's hearing is uber-sensitive, but this looked really botched up. More yelling from Pete about car metaphors used to describe the stuff Waffles would never do in a million years. Goofy is about to march in to protest this outrage; so Pete slams the door and barricades it with his body. Pete chuckles and accuses Goofy of being a lousy door-to-door salesman. Speak for yourself there, you psychological projector. Pete slams into the wall as the door flings open because Goofy cannot let up for a minute in his outrage nor his protesting. Pete pops out; grabs Goofy and throws him into the living room off-screen. Pete runs over and proclaims that it was just his goofed up neighbour. Carp has the Gruffi pose on; so he's not amused. Goofy demands to talk about Waffles and Carp wants to know what Goofy has to do with Waffles. You can guess the joke lie coming a mile away, can't ya?! Yip; it's the dreaded Beligan waffles; which are always good. Sort of. Pete claims that he is Goofy exchange cooking recipes for waffles which Carp isn't exactly convinced of this. Pete bails on Carpy stage left into Pete's man cave as Goofy has the most bent up pool cue ever and ask Pete is he's jumpy. Nah; he's actually very false-hoody. See; I can make up words like Donald Trump. Pete claims that he's fine; but is not sure about Carp as he claims that Carp is a tax collector. Doesn't Pete realize that Peg is watching every second of this from upstairs and you left her unguarded to assure you that you'll have to blow your cover. Stupid idiot! Goofy of course, rips up the green carpet of the pool table with the bent pool cue of doom. That has to be the softest softwood I have ever seen anyone use. Goofy wants to talk about Waffles; so Pete bails stage right as Peg and Carp exchanges notes on the situation in the lobby of the house. Carp talks about Horace as Peg is intrigued; but Pete grabs her and drags her away off-screen. Again; what is this "no man on woman contact" thing I keep hearing about in Disney?
Pete claims that Horace was the name of his old station wagon, because everyone in DTVA has to treat objects like human beings. Oh; and buzz off on that because he gets very emotional. Huh; I wonder if Carp is the same guy who voices the Big Cheese in Samurai Pizza Cats. I also wonder if he gets emotional watching the Wizard of Oz. I also wonder if Samurai Pizza Cats will get the original Japanese version dubbed in English. I also wonder why I bothered ranting on this episode when I forgot to take my meds last night and couldn't sleep? I ask because we are officially more than halfway through this episode and nothing of note has actually happened outside of Pete's abuse of Waffles. Might as well change Waffles name to Boots; it will end just as badly anyway. Peg walks off and decides to let it go as Goofy yells at Pete and Pete does a really bad Homer Simpson d'oh as he runs into the man cave. Old footage from 1997 Jay Leno's headlines are much more amusing than this episode. Pete pants and wants Goofy to say his peace. Goofy proclaims that he and Max have deducted...AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! That's a good one, Mr. Weagle! POW! OUCH! Ummmm... that Waffles isn't allergic to their house and that Pete is up to something. You wish you were Rebecca, Goofy. Pete feigns innocence; but it's mostly idioticence. Okay; that's two words I made up. I think. Pete dares Goofy to think of something Pete might do; which causes Goofy to stammer and then say I don't know. Sadly; this is Disney, so no green slime came down on his head. Sadly; no chartreuse paint either. Drat! Pete is not amused by this because Goofy is accusing Pete of pulling a fast one on him because he took Waffles in as an act of friendship which surprises me because he didn't clearly blow his cover during that promo. Pete feigns that he has been injured in a figural sense; which is the closest thing to actually being injured without being so. Cue the melodramatics and water works; which is pathetic even by Pete's really low standards. Pete drags Goofy's dragged body towards the double glass doors and opens them. Pete blows off Goofy for water stains as Goofy gets up and walks out before Pete closes the glass doors saying that there is only one more to go. So yes; Goofy is really stupid. But I repeat myself three times already as Pete return to Carp as we exchange more notes as Carp teases saying that he's very pleased with the home environment; and then notices Chainsaw at the door; and blows it off because in his mind; dogs and cat cannot live together because then a bigot's mind would blow up and die, in Carp's case. Carp grabs the contract from Pete's pocket and threatens to rip it up. Wait; I don't recall Pete even signing one as Pete grab the dog and claims that it isn't his as the front door opens to reveal Goofy.
Pete gives Chainsaw to Goofy and proclaims that Goofy can have it, in which Goofy is very happy to see. Goofy keeps the door open as Waffles shows up just as Goofy proclaims that he only has one thing to say to Pete; acting like he's finally onto him. Of course; if he was really onto him; the episode would be over at the fifteen minute mark and that's seven minutes too short. So Goofy has to act like a total moron (which is his character feature, by the way) as Pete gulps while Goofy proclaims that Pete is the most honest man I know. I'm shocked Peg is not heard laughing her ass off hearing that as Goofy claims that Pete always pays his taxes; which Carp calls a scintillating bit of information as Carp has an evil look on his face. Uh-oh! I sense that Carp is a bigger schemer than Pete is as Pete throws Carp and Goofy out of the house and slams the door. He barricades it with his own body and breathes a sigh of relief. Notice that the commercial shoot hasn't even started yet and we are almost nearing the end of the second act? The door opens ajar and Carp wonders why the cat looks less orange as Pete yells at him about wanting orange and so he slams the door and whips out the aerosal spray paint and spray paints Waffles some more. Geez; didn't anyone who does this in real life realize Pete was a jackass heel? So the door opens and Waffles is more orange and coughing now. Carp falls for it of course; but then comes back and asks Pete if he can do the Can-Can dance; which is the prototype to the Ham-Ham's dance from Hamtaro. Pete proclaims that he can can-can like a champ...calling Carp a chump. Carp tells Pete to get up bright and early so his new star can be a star before leaving and that is that. Scene change to Max sulking on the floor of the living room watching television as Goofy walks in with Chainsaw claiming that he was wrong all along about Pete as we hear laughing in the background. I should note that Goofy's television set is in black and white as the reporter from earlier is talking to Carp, who is rubbing Waffles in his hands. Max stammers to Goofy that he needs to see this. Goofy claims that they should have never accused Pete of doing something wrong. Oh; like kidnapping a pet under false pretenses for instance. Too bad that is exactly what Pete did actually. Max pleads for him to see this as Goofy puts Chainsaw down (NOT THAT WAY!) and turns around to see Carp, calling him Pete's tax collector. HAHA! Max yells at Goofy to wake up and smell the larceny. I'm pretty sure we are smelling your fart juice, Max. We see Pete and Carp shaking hands on the deal as the reporter explains it all as Goofy proclaims that Pete stole his cat. Wait; I thought it was Goofy's cat?! Oh never mind, my head hurts as the segment ends nearly fifteen minutes in. Yes; we spent fifteen minutes setting this up and I don't care at all about it. Plus; this is basically "Wrecks, Lies and Videotape" all over again; only with less charm.
After the commercial break; we head to in front of Pete's walkway as Goofy and Pete are playing tug of war with Waffles' litterbox, while Waffles is still in it. Peg comes in with the contract and orders Pete to give Waffles back to Goofy. I got a better idea; how about letting Goofy in on the commercial and split the profits, even if it's 90/10. Twenty thousand dollars is still a tidy sum of money methinks. Pete gets Waffles, Goofy gets the litterbox on his head and a trash can stuck on his ass. Peg has the cat as Pete tries to rationalize all this while Pistol is asking if Pete really stole Max's cat. Ummm; yes, but it's was all under a legally binding contract, even though it was signed under false pretenses, therefore it should be null and void. Pete calls stealing a harsh word; even though it's accurate as Goofy takes the banana peel off of himself and accuses Pete of stealing. Pete brings out the contract of doom to prove his point as Max even has to concede this, even though, it's signed under...you guessed it. Goofy then counters, claiming that there is a verbal contract that the cat is actually Max's; because Goofy is too stupid to read fine print, nor hire a lawyer to prove that Pete's contract was...you guessed it. Pete gets in Goofy's face claiming that his verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's printed on. Geez; someone tell Pete to understand what a verbal contract is, STAT! They insult each other as Peg has to cut them off at the pass and scream. Peg proclaims that it should be up to the cat to decide this. Memo to Peg: Legit animals cannot give informed consent. Epic fail! Waffles cuddles on Goofy's legs and runs to Max; so Pete uses the skateboard to counter because it's up to Waffles, even though Waffles has already made his decision. Pete proclaims that he can spend his life as a goof; or as a rich and famous television star. Pete pushes the skateboard up and Waffles is into the air as Pete grabs it; declaring that Waffles chose him, even though Waffles cannot give informed consent anyway. Goofy and Max are too stupid to realize it and they walk away saying goodbye sulking. Pete tickles Waffles behind the neck and laughs because he gave them Chainsaw instead as Peg is really angry calling this the pits. After all those episodes of Pete pulling some brazen stunts before, this one is the worst to Peg. Pete claims that Waffles chose him. I think Peg was talking about giving Chainsaw to Goofy and Max; but Peg sweet talks Pete right into screaming that he's spending the night in the garage. Huh.
Pete gets into the house anyway; and I guess he's still allowed in the house but is barred from the bedroom. That hardly sounds like a punishment to me as Pete is thinking, while Waffles wants to play mini gold frisbee with Pete; causing Pete to blow him off. So we head to the garage as Pete and Waffles have top hats on and only Pete is dancing, which sucks like crap by the way. I don't see how this is a punishment for Pete though. I would think sleeping in the doghouse would be more suitable than this. Pete ends his dance and Waffles is miserable as hell, because Pete is an asshole who wants money. Pete blows him off because if he can can-can; Waffles can. I have no doubts that Waffles can; but he doesn't wanna. I doubt that you Pete can can-can though; which makes me feel sorry for Waffles, as if the animal abuse with the spray paint wasn't enough for thee. Waffles tries to bail stage left; but Pete grabs him of course. Waffles is forced to do the most pathetic version of the can-can dance and then is dropped on the ground looking limper than a dish rag. Fade to black and return to Goofy's living room as Max is looking at the photo album of a picture of Waffles, sulking. Goofy proclaims that he's not giving up without a fight as Max claims Waffles has made his decision. For goodness sakes; is Max so stupid that he erases his memories everytime Pete is around. Goofy opens the closet and of course international objects fall on him and bury them; but not before he finds a movie reel containing his home movies. I really shudder to think what Goofy filmed on that movie reel. Scene change to the garage AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) as Pete is preparing his own lunch containing bread, lettuce, fish and a whole turkey as a sandwich. Pete claims that there's nothing wrong with not being able to talk to anyone since he's getting $250,000. Wait; I thought Pete's cut was $200,000?! Oh god; my head hurts from this stupid logic break. Even more absurd is that there is a banquet table set up with food with Waffles sitting at the other end with Pete blowing him off for not being chubby. Waffles points to his point and demands to be fed. Pete grumbles and insults Waffles as he walks to the other end of the table and spoon feds Waffles with mashed potatoes, while treating Waffles like a toddler. Then we hear loud noises outside as Pete wants to know what the hell the Goofs are up to now. Why not? That's better than most of this crap anyway.
Pete and Waffles walk out of the garage together as we see a movie projection screen in the middle of the street playing old footage as we see Max manning the projector and Goofy having the most metallic megaphone ever made. We see footage of them going to the fish market, the beach and other places as Waffles is popping his eyes while Goofy proclaims that he wishes Waffles was back home where he belongs. Waffles teases not buying it; but walks over towards Max; but them gets a smell as Pete shows a plate of steak and lobster and Waffles turns on Max and walks back into the garage. How is Pete paying for this is a question that mystifies me at the moment. Goofy and Max sulk in defeat as Pete taunts them and closes the garage door. Jump cut to Waffles eating a cream pie at the table as Pete's wireless phone rings. Pete answers the phone and we get a split screen shot of Pete talking to Carp in his limo informing Pete that they need to get the commercial in the can so to speak; and so they are going to film the commercial on Pete's front lawn. Pete gasps because Waffles cannot do the can-can dance, even though Waffles appears much more willing to follow Pete now. Pete asks if they are doing it tomorrow and Carp claims that it would be too silly; so they are doing it tonight. I see Carp comes from the Vince Russo school of booking commercials now as the garage door opens and in comes Carp with a grey shirt, brown pants and a hat dogears and two video camera. Why do they need two cameras when only one of them is doing the filming?! Anyhow; Carp wants showtime right now as Goofy and Max watch on. Goofy is giddy about this legit commercial shoot; but Max is not amused at all. So we use the clapper board to begin the first scene as Waffles is standing in front of a white screen with a bowl of cat food while Pete is following Carp claiming that Waffles isn't up to doing the can-can dance tonight. Personally; I'm not up to reviewing this episode anymore; but I still have about three minutes left; so I must continue on. Carp gets into the director's chair and tells Pete that he sees the can-can dance tonight; or no $200,000 for Pete. Pete panics on cue as Carp has stolen the megaphone from Goofy and yells for action. Suddenly; Pete opens his eyes and Waffles has a top hat on and is doing the can-can dance.
Yeah; Pete treated him right and now Waffles is being paid off. See what happens when you are nice once in a while, Pete? Although I doubt he will get it; because that requires actual empathy and Pete has none of that. So he does the dance and Pete is loving it as he smacks Carp in the back and Carp falls onto the ground from his chair. Carp blows him off and tells Waffles to go to the cat food and eat it. Action! Waffles goes to the bowl of cat food and smells it; becoming repulsed by it and no sells. Uh-oh! Despite being nice to Waffles; Pete fed him human food and now Waffles is rejecting the crappy cat food stuff. Pete claims that Waffles is stuffed from having a big dinner; which is in fact true. Pete goes over to Waffles and pleads with the cat to eat it; but Waffles no sells because it's yucky cat food. Pete then gets down on all fours and starts eating the cat food. Ooooooooo...Finally; something worth talking about! There is a scene in Dragon Quest 8 where someone was humilated into eating dog food on camera; which was later cut out in remakes of the game because in Japan, it was considered a form of unlawful abuse. This is something you would see in Jackass clones in America; but in Japan, it is considered an unlawful act. It's like using any words relating to crazy being censored like the word f*ck is here in North America. Needless to say; this shoot is falling apart at the seams. Carp runs in and protests this outrage as Peg runs in with the grocery list bill to prove that Pete was feeding Waffles steak and lobster as Carp blows him off for ruining him because of what I stated earlier. Goofy offers Chainsaw to do the commercial as Chainsaw is eating dog food on camera. Carp ponders it over and sees an ad in the making as he cuts Waffles from his contract and Chainsaw can now do the commercial. Pete runs in and claims Chainsaw is his dog as Pistol points out that it's Max's now. Pete grumbles and then remembers that the contract states that Pete gets 200,000 "big ones" since Waffles does the can-can dance. Carp agrees with him and brings in a fish truck. Uh-oh! I think we know where this is going now. Pete bangs on the back of the truck and it opens, dumping bags of kitty litter on Pete; as Carp points out that he's not stupid enough to pay actual money for him. I figured this out the moment he did that non-verbal cue earlier in the episode, so kudos to Dennis for that at least. Max goes over to Waffles and apologizes for saying that he's no fun as Waffles bails and Max thinks that the Moral Event Horzion has taken place between them. Then Waffles returns with a frisbee and Max grabs it and throws it stage right to end the episode at 21:18. The finish was fine and Carp was okay; but this wasn't much fun at all. ** (40%).
THE REVIEW LINE
I'm not going to say much about this episode because I just went through it without doing much in terms of analysis; because there wasn't much to see here. It was basically another stupid Pete scheme; only it involved painting Waffles like Garfield and it was pretty disgusting to the point where I got so bored with it, I felt like I wasted six hours of my life. The finish was rushed to death as well and there was no effort to make 90% of this episode feel good nor memorable. Dennis only appeared once and we never saw him again and I can clearly see why. Kennedy was also screwing up as well; although that was a minor issue here as everything else was just boring or disgusting without being memorably disgusting for me to fully hate it. Yeah; there were a few funny spots with Goofy; but not much else. So that's all I have to say about it. So....
Thumbs down for this episode and I'll see you all next time.