Return to 50 Webs


Disclaimer#1: All images, characters and material is (C) 1990/1991 Walt Disney Company and is being used without permission. The webmaster has made sure that no money was made in the creation of this web page and that all material used here is used with the up most affection and respect to the Walt Disney Company and the Tale Spin Team.


Disclaimer#2: The views expressed here are solely the views of the webmaster and no one else. The webmaster has no intentions to change anyone's minds about a particular subject and respects the views of the viewers. Comments about this and other editorial can be E-Mail at gweagle@eastlink.ca or signing the Cloudkicker guest book.


The Ungoofables

Reviewed: 02/16/2017

That's Unpossible!


All right; time for another Goofy story about one of Goofy's ancestors doing stupid stuff; but managing to live on in history. This time, Goofy is relating a story to Max about his great granduncle Elliot Goof who was on the trail of a pair of some of the most wanted outlaws in history. Well; the Robin Goof one was awesome outside of a lousy ending, so how does this one fare? Let's rant on shall we...?!

This episode is written by Mirith Schilder and story edited by the late Bruce Talkington. The animation was provided by Sunwoo Animation.


We begin this one with a shot of the red sun complete with red title card. We pan down to Goofy's house and then head inside the kitchen with Goofy sweating like he just went to an Oscar convention. It's a heatwave out there, you see. Goofy goes to the fridge to get himself some cold soda pop in a glass of ice. He opens the fridge and it's overflowing with food that it buried Goofy under it. Goofy has a bowl of pasta on his head as the soda pop slips from Goofy's fingers and bonks Goofy off the pasta bowl head. Surprisely; the bottle doesn't shatter and good thing Goofy's wearing a metal helmet, or BS&P would have a concussion on it's head. Goofy does grab the bottle; and then uses a watermelon as a shield as he slowly opens the freezer and nothing in there moves. So Goofy tries to get the icecube tray; out, it no sells, as objects are falling from the sides. Goofy slams the freezer; we hear crackling sounds as Goofy breathes a sigh of relief. Goofy opens freezer and an ice cube tray along with an ice cream container falls on Goofy's head. Goofy checks the tray and there's no ice cubes in them. So what was that crackling sound then? Max is headed to the door wearing a cyan blue shirt and red shorts; but Goofy yells at Max and Max comes back basically admitting that he didn't put water in the ice cube trays. Why would he forget that? The heat is clearly getting to Max as Max grabs one of the trays and tries to empty an ice cube tray into a glass on the table with the bottle; but there's nothing because it's empty. Oh wait; there was an ice flake, my mistake. Goofy takes Max into the living room as Max claims that it was only ice. Goofy goes to the book shelf in the living room and takes out the dreaded PHOTO ALBUM OF DOOM because it's time to take your responsibilities more seriously, including the itsy-bitsy ones. Max is horrified by this because it involves the photo album of doom! DA DA DAAAAAAAAA! Goofy sits down on the sofa and pats the seat to indicate that Max should sit down. Max sits down as Goofy opens the album and flips through the pages explaining his great uncle Elliot Goof (Disney Captions has it as Eliot Goof) who was the greatest crime buster of the early twenth century. Elliot Goof looks like Goofy in gumshoe gear as Max points to a picture of basically a version of Max who wore brown overalls, blue/white shirt, white sneakers and a cap as WE HIT THE FLASHBACK~!

So we head into the streets of a city as cars are driving on the street and we see the Max lookalike as the narrator (Disney Captions claims it's someone named Winchell; who is voiced by Jim Cummings by the way) adddresed him as Elliot Goof as a child as a young blazing beacon of justice. Elliot is wearing a blue sash with a metal on it as he's directing traffic and getting whirlwinded and desrespected in the process. Elliot jumps up and blows the whistle to stop this nonsense as we scene change to the street again. Why would they bother with the scene change when it's the same road? Anyhow; we see the traffic stop before the crosswalk as Pistol (in gear that shows a lot less skin) is about to cross the street as Winchell claims that everyone saw Elliot as a dim bulb. Which is a nicer way of saying that he's a stupid idiot. Pistol crosses midway; but then blows off Elliot claiming that she wants to live to be six and then runs off. At first, I thought she was playing a joke on Elliot; but if I was afraid of something, I would not act like Pistol in that promo since here comes Peg and Pete as kids holding hands and basically looking like themselves from the present, only they love each other and don't mind annoying Elliot at all. So they taunt him and cut the overalls straps as Elliot's pants are down showing his white/pink spotted boxers as Elliot is generally obilivous to everything going on. Why should anyone be surprised by this? Kid Pete and Peg cross the street as Elliot finally sees his pants are down and pulls them up. He then walks over and blows them off because there ought to be a law for trouble makers like them. There ought to be a law against claiming that Peg and Pete would ever like each other and Peg willfully being a heel; but this is fictional, so no go. Pete unbuttons Elliot's sash and ties him to the conveniently placed lamp pole. Elliot tries to cross the street; but he bounces back and we bringing it around the town. Elliot feels like Spongebob Squarepants doing his blowing bubbles techninque. Pete throws him around some more; just to be a dick as he calls Elliot a goof and leaves with Peg. Elliot is screaming for help as we pan up; and hear Winchell proclaiming that despite Elliot's pride being bruised, he felt a responsbility to promote safety and justice that could survive deep puncture wounds and total humiliation. What about total annihilation?! I don't think even cockroaches can survive that.

So we return to reality (no, not really) as Max puts on green glasses and tries to leave with a board; but Goofy stops him and plops him down on the seat; because we haven't even got to the good stuff yet. Max moans as we jump cut to the shot of kid Elliot Goof in the album of doom again. So we turn the page as I discover that Elliot lives in Chicago and we head to 1929 as there is a bunch of car chases in the streets and then we head to a bank as we have a bunch of idiots robbing each other; except the first one who is actually robbing the teller. Apparently; tying your shoelaces to your shoes is a crime in Chicago as we head outside with the adult Elliot Goof in a police uniform reading a piece of paper as Winchell explains that Elliot couldn't get a job as a Bingo Referee. So Elliot is impersonating a police officer, then? Isn't that in itself a crime? Today, yes. Not sure about 1929 though. Elliot tries to open the door; but a grey dog clips him in the leg and gets cut off. So we head into the bingo hall with a catnose manning the bingo balls...Oh wait; let me try that again: So we head into the bingo hall with a catnose attending to the basket of bingo ball...Oh wait; take three..So we head to the...I can't say it without being filthy. Anyhow; we see the dog coming in with a bottle of soda in his mouth; and it looks like a poorly drawn Jock from Lady & The Tramp. I should note that Jock was in A Bad Reflection On You; which was also animated by Sunwoo Animation. Scottie/Jock in TaleSpin was much better drawn and animated than Goof Troop's Jock by the way. The bingo operator is wearing a white shirt, black bowtie, blue overalls with red straps as Elliot comes in and salutes him. By the way; the first bingo ball drawn was B-52 of course, despite the fact that there's no such thing as B-52 in bingo. B is from 16 - 30 by the way. The bingo operator tells him the position has been filled as he opens the bottle of soda and drinks a bit; then recoils in disgust because the soda is lukewarm and requires ice. So everyone puts their glasses of soda on the table as the operator offers him a job as an ice man. Okay. So we scene change into the streets of Chicago as Elliot is driving on the sidewalk with the ice box wagon as a robber in a green car pulls up to Elliot in the middle of the street, whispers in Goofy's ears.

Goofy whispers in the robber's ear (I should note that the robbers look like badly drawn Beagle Boys with a few seconds of them showing guns in a rare moment for this series), the robber thanks Elliot and leaves as Elliot tells him to drive safely. Elliot is about to leave when a policeman in uniform on a horse arrives asking if he's seen the robbers. Elliot says no; but he did see masked men with sacks of money going out of town. The officer thanks him and leaves stage left without a hint of irony. HAHA! Elliot is also very clumsey and is bumping into anything that moves. Winchell sums him up well as someone who likes to serve; but his brain cannot handle the responsibility. Of course! Scene change to a factory as a black car parks next to the building and out comes Pete and Peg in mobster gear with machine gun and pistol (in that order) as Pete is called Frank Nutti, once led by Derek the Dwarf before he was killed by Peg Doll. Yes folks; this is the first person in DTVA to be killed by guns outright, at least it was mentioned. We don't know how Gosalyn's grandfather was murdered; only that Hammerhead was the one who killed him. Kit's parents are still pending on what happened to them. Peg Doll is the brains of the operation; but still acts like a female stereotype just the same. We discover that it's a soda pop factory because alcohol is not allowed in DTVA anymore as Peg and Frank turn off the lights just as Frenchie backs away claiming that he would never tell them. Tell them what? The lights come back on and Frenchie is tied up to a chair despite the fact that Frank had the machine gun cocked so that he was teasing on killing him. Frenchie no sells as Peg twirls a pistol around and wants the cola formula right now. They talk a lot of French here and since Frenchie understands French; he surrenders faster than France does....Oh wait... Basically; Frenchie bounces around while Pete writes down the formula for Cream Cola de Calamity. I'll leave the recipe as an exercise to the reader because it sounds like a legit diet cola recipe to me. Peg takes the notepad from Frank and rips it out, putting it in her flat chested breats; ordering Frank that it's time to bail. Peg drags Frank out as Frank is loving her style as the police arrive in front of the building with vans as they yell over the PA system wanting them to state their name and occupation. Out comes Frank and Peg as Frank calls himself a nice guy. This is enough for eight police cars to panic, crash into each other and bail out. Wimps!

Winchell proclaims that no one stood before Frank Nutti; most of all, the police. Geez; and I thought it was because Peg legit murdered Derek the Dwarf with lead; which would provoke fear into anyone. No wonder Pete cannot stand up to present Peg today. We head to city hall which is a capital building, as Winchell explains that justice lives as a by-product of chance politics basically. Jump cut to the steps as Pistol is shown wearing green shorts, brown shoes and socks; and an oversized beret cap with a bag of newspapers; holding the blankest looking newspaper in history. She proclaims that mobsters have gotten away with murder and the mayor is twindling his thumbs. In comes the mayor who is the exact same guy from Inspector Goofy; only he looks more generic with the purple trenchcoat and hat. He apparently lost the red nose when he became mayor of Spoonerville; it seems. Mayor is pissed off at this as Pistol taunts him on the re-election plans as the mayor flicks a quarter over her head and Pistol flies backwards and tumbles down the stairs; probably landing on her head at least a dozen times. Geez; the mayor is such a mean spirited prick! The mayor marches into the building and slams the newspaper down on his desk inside his office. He goes to his phone and orders someone to call the FBI. Jump cut to an office inside the FBI as a grey trenchcoat goof answers the phone as we discover that the mayor's name is Baba. Baba needs someone to clean this town; but the FBI is filled with cowards as they pass the phone and the buck to everyone within the office. So the telephone wire is stretched out as we see on the desk; the only guy who is working at his desk, which is Fester Ness; whom we saw in the previous Goofy story: Robin Goof and his Melchalony Men of course; as one of the Melchalony Men. So he's upgraded from a robber who sucks at it to being an FBI agent, who sucks at it and is stupid enough to take the assignment. Fester takes the phone and goes flying through the office; crashes through a brick wall and lands right on Mayor Baba's desk. Yes folks; the mayor's building is right next door to the FBI office. Why didn't Baba simply just walk into their office? Baba deserves to be thrown out of office, just for that alone. Festor gets up and salute him as Baba claims that Festor doesn't waste time; because the FBI wastes money. So the FBI in DTVA world means Festor Bull Invesigations?! Okay; good to know.

So Baba gives Festor a blue magazine and wants Festor to put Frank Nutti behind bars and Festor laughs his ass off on it. At first; I thought he was laughing his ass off because no one has been successful at it and even the police run away from him; but since Festor accepted the terms and didn't run, I suggest it was because of Frank's last name being called Nutti, or Nutty as they say. We discover that Frank and Peg are selling counterfeit Calmity Cream Cola. Yeah; because somehow that's worse than stealing alcohol recipes. BS&P RULEZ, you know! Festor opens the book and see's Frank's picture featuring the worst animation ever as Festor screams and hides under in front of the desk. Baba grabs the book and tells Festor to get a partner and go undercover because Frank is a tough nut to crack. You don't say. I mean, if you have a woman who can kill their former boss; then I would say that you don't mess with them. Festor takes the book; looks at it and Frank acts mean as the animation is better here at least. Festor screams and runs out of the office; slamming the door as Baba loves Festor's something. As the door closes; there is a goof dog ears dressed up like a lady bug with a shortwave radio beeping. HAHA! Geez; even I didn't see that one coming as Baba is shocked and appalled. I have just realized that Godfrey Daniels is a sub for Goddamn. So saying God in "Godfrey" is okay by BS&P. Baba has been bugged literally here as we head to a soda pop factory as we head inside the factory with Peg, Frank (drinking soda pop) and the ladybug dressed goof with red hair. Wait; so how did he get out of there without being arrested since the FBI is literally next door?! STUPID IDIOTS! So we see soda being made at this factory as the heels exchange notes on the situation with the FBI. So Buggy Daniels drinks up and chokes getting red faced because the stuff tastes horrible. Wait; so that formula was Buckley's cough medicine?! Oh; and they want to find someone to ice Festor Ness. I was hoping they called him Festor B. Eye; just to see if anyone got the joke. So Frank brings out an out of nowhere fly swatter as Buggy Daniels backs away pleading for mercy. That is not the dumbest thing in the world. The dumbest thing in the world would be Buggy pleading for mercy with PEG welding the out of nowhere fly swatter. So Buggy Daniels gets MURDERED off-screen by the fly swatter; which acts like he's getting murdered by a sledgehammer. Yeah; sure.

Peg sits there drinking up her soda and then she sells it as tasting gross. Head outside the soda pop factory as we see Festor sniffing behind a bush in front of the building...Oh wait; let's try that again: We see Festor putting his nose to work behind a building...Oh wait; take three: We see Festor putting...I cannot say it without sounding filthy. Hat pops off and down as we see Chainsaw sniffing the area in the foreground, for no reason at all. Chainsaw sniffs Festor; Festor waves and blows off Chainsaw and then Chainsaw turns around to notice that Elliot is coming towards the soda pop factory with the ice cube freezer on wheels and humming a tune. Elliot opens the freezer and takes out a block of ice as Chainsaw is excited as hell to see him. Elliot throws the ice stage left and it crashes into some trash cans off-screen as Chainsaw was chasing them. Elliot looks at the soda factory and states the obvious to us. Apparently; eureka is now on the forbidden words list; since they keep saying Topeka in this show. Elliot wheels the freezer down the steps like a stupid idiot (Geez; what else is new?) and Elliot tumbles into the basement like a stupid idiot. So Elliot crashes into everything not nailed down right in front of a desk where Frank Nutti and Peg Doll are as Peg claims that it's a raid. It sure is; the raid of the Goofy Troopers. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummmm...Elliot does the Ron Tussin spot into the conveyer belt as the freezer goes flying off-screen. Frank brings out the machine and tells G-Man to sat his prayer. Wait; shouldn't it be; "E-Man"; since his first name is Elliot, not Goofy?! Elliot dodges gunfire and gets on the conveyer belt while Frank laughs it up. Frank keeps shooting and Elliot keeps dodging as Elliot runs towards a conveniently placed switch and Frank screams for him not to throw...THE SWITCH~! Probably a good idea; because we don't want Nintendo to get any...Oh wait, too late. Both ways as bottles of soda go flying like crazy as Frank rolls on bottles and flies off-screen stage right. This causes bottles to pop and fizz due to unrelenting pressure as the factory does the most muted explosion in history ending with Frank's pantleg stuck to a gear wheel and hanging upside down near the soda pop factory machine. Festor was looking on in disbelief as Elliot just put the krunch on the kingpin of soda. Elliot finds his freezer and turns around as Peg brings out her pistol as Elliot gulps ending the segment 11 minutes in.

After the commercial break; Peg of course claims that they never actually met, when in reality they did earlier in the episode. Like I said; memories are not infallable. Elliot puts his arms up as Peg demands to know who this goofball is. Elliot claims that he's the ice man as the soda color has turned from purple to orange. Keep in mind; that the soda is supposed to be cola and cola is not purple nor orange in color. Frank apparently fell down and hurt his elbow coming in since he was rubbing it. Peg thinks Elliot is a professional iceman; because hitman is also on the BS&P forbidden words list as well it seems. Sunwoo cannot seem to get the animation of Peg's pistol correct as it seems that it teleports in the close up shots compared to the far ones. It's so jumpy. Anyhow; Elliot claims that he can ice anyone at anytime as Peg asks what is he doing here. Elliot claims that he was simply drumming up business as Frank embraces Elliot and likes the prospect of Elliot icing some old friends of his. Elliot agrees to it as Frank brings out the "List Of Frank"; which has absurd booking names such as Fingers Gillespie, Trick Knee Tucker, Face Cast Freddy, Chris Jericho...Oh wait; that was the "List of KO". Peg runs in and steals the list; telling babycakes to cool it. Peg gives Elliot just one person to ice and that is FBI agent Fester Ness. Somehow; this shouldn't be hard since Festor's career is pretty much on ice anyway. Elliot asks her if she wants him cubed or crushed. I personally like shaved, since he has a puffy beard. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummmm...Festor panics outside and runs out with the bushes. Oh wait; let's try that again: Festor panics outside and runs out with the surub....Oh wait; take three: Festor...I can't say it without being filthy; so we return to reality (no, not really) as Max lies about this being a great story. Yeah; because it's awesome so far. Of course; Max is trying to weasel his way out of his punishment as the skateboard is tied to a red hose when Max tries to bail. How is that possible when we saw nothing of the sort in the previous scene with them? Goofy pulls him back, because it's not over and the story gets even better, you see. Yeah; that's one way to make us want to force Max to listen to this story. Oh; and Max calls Elliot a hitman too; so it's just a funny joke about icing people used as a killing metaphor. Max is forced to sit down and sulk because that's what Humpty Dumpty claimed. Screw you, Max! This story is much better than that!

So we head back to the police station as Elliot is wheeling the freezer right at the front steps. Jay Leno would have a field day with this goofball, I swear to God. Elliot bounces the freezer into the door and Winchell tells Elliot Ace Goof to pull instead. Jump cut to Festor running into his office as he stands in front of his desk gasping because here comes Elliot with the freezer whistling. Festor sits down and opens the drawers (NOT THOSE ONES!) and grabs weapon after weapon trying to find his gun; including a small mini cliff gun, sword and a giant axe. Geez; is everything in this world abuses Eleroo's pouch? Also; he throws away a cliff gun anyway despite saying that he's looking for his gun. Elliot opens the door and goes inside asking Festor where he wants the ice and Festor is begging for mercy on his knees claiming anywhere but the kneecaps. Oh; so Festor's nickname is "Trick Knee Tucker"? Okay; good to know. Elliot dumps the ice off-screen and wipes his hands clean of this as he goes to the desk. Festor is shocked because he's merely an ice cube delivery man who trashed Frank Nutti's soda pop factory and somehow was not killed in the process. Elliot claims that he is a people person; which so happens to unintentionally insult smart people person. Festor claims that the FBI could use someone like Elliot as a sparkle appears out of nowhere (a known motif of Sunwoo Animation by the way) as we segueway to Elliot with an FBI book with a badge shield and a machine gun rifle on the cover. Also; the "How to narrator" returns; because Winchell wasn't enough and this requires a special touch, I guess. We zoom out to see Elliot reading while wearing a zipped up orange prisoner jumpsuit. I'm not going to bother explaining what the How To Narrator said; because I'm confused. Does this mean Elliot was convicted of something and this is a conditional prison sentence or something. Elliot claims that he loves this stuff. Scene change to Elliot holding handcuffs as we go through chapter one on how to use them. I see the FBI handbook is written by five year olds in this show. Elliot flips the handcuffs and basically handcuffs himself. HAHA! Elliot is wearing sneakers as well as he whirlwinds himself with his hands in his groin area and then whirlwinds; managing to fall flat on his face while handcuffing his ankles to boot! HAHA! Of course; Elliot is a stupid idiot since he forgot where to place the key of course.

Scene change to Elliot reading chapter two which is how to use a tear gas gernade. This is the defintion of a diploma mill school that I have ever seen that wasn't on-line. Elliot brings out a canisiter of tear gas as the narrator tells us that it is a last resort to deal with civil disobience. So what is the first resort, using that machine gun on the cover?! Really, sir?! Elliot shakes can as the narrator tells us that the safety pin is very difficult to remove. Of course; the pin drops easily onto the ground, the gas comes out and Elliot sobs like a baby. Scene change to a far shot of the FBI training grounds where is basically four brick walls with cardboard towns on each side; making this more Z-grade than the training grounds in Red Zone Cuba. So it's chapter three which is target practice. Oh; this is going to be fun to mock. Elliot turns the pages and finds a pistol inside; a six shooter if you will. Which we all know shoots more than six bullets. Elliot takes out the gun and puts the book down as he shouts various childish promos as there is a parking meter in the middle of the training ground. Yes; a five cents parking meter. Is this Lucy's new business model? Elliot puts five cents into the parking meter and starts pointing his gun at the air as we get off murder reference #2 for the episode. We see flip cardboard shots of men in trenchcoats as Elliot fires the pistol and instead of a hole; the cardboard bails. Is BS&P such an ass now that they cannot have anything shot now? Especially after Paradise Lost? Elliot gets whacked in the back by a cardboard gangster of course and Elliot dares them to try that again. Another one pops Elliot and we have the dreaded pinball spot again. This leads to the...I cannot believe I'm typing this...the SCOOBY-DOO CHASE SEQUENCE THE CARDBOARD MOBSTER EDITION~! I said "stupid idiot"! Scene change to Elliot reading the book on chapter four with working undercover with disguises that look so fake even James Bond would hang his head in shame. Here's the problem with this: If this were real; there's no way Eillot would ever pass the sniff test of getting into the FBI, let alone train with them. Of course; if this were real, few FBI agents would chicken out of cleaning up Chicago even in 1929! It's a freaking soda factory; how can anyone take that seriously?! Scene change to Elliot dressed up like a Hawaiian woman in front of dozens of trenchcoat goofs reading the newspapers on the sidewalk. Yeah; that is so discreet. Not. The men look at Elliot confused as Festor shoves his way in. Oh thank goodness for doing that because we are really killing time with this stupidity. I know this because Festor gives Elliot his diploma for completing the FBI training. Of course; because in this storyline, no one except Elliot is willing to clean up Chicago! So everyone looks incredibly stupid in this and it only encouraged diploma mills all around the world now. Nice one, show; nice one.

They shake hands as Elliot is now a federal agent and he has an assignment waiting for Elliot. Elliot is giddy over this, so much so that he thanks him by kissing him. Okay; that was funny. Festor claims that he perfers ingratitude. So we head back to the soda factory as Elliot has returned in an FBI trenchcoat and stuff giving Peg a bullet ridden hat as Frank is at his desk tying up sticks of TNT. Frank proclaims that now that Fester Ness has been iced; nothing can stand in their way now. Elliot asks what it is; and Frank proclaims that he is going to blow up the Calamity Cola factory. Something tells me Frenchie gave them the wrong formula here as Elliot asks why. Peg offers Elliot a soda bottle and Elliot drinks up. Elliot gets train whistled and then sighs because it's smooth. Yes folks; Elliot is the only stupid idiot in the world who would drink Buckey's medicine and LIKE IT! Elliot says that he need to talk with Festor and we clearly hear him and he did it right in front of Peg and Frank. Let's see if they ignore it or not as Elliot runs up the stairs after killing some time looking around. Elliot goes to a pay phone and starts dialing. Okay; why does the phone needs a coin clip; when Elliot inserted the coin on the top of the phone itself?! We go to a split screen to a phone booth in town as Festor hears ringing and answers the phone. We get references to wumpus and Big Mumuu; don't care. Elliot speaks like he's a dumb agent as Festor plays tug of war on Elliot and Elliot bangs into the payphone. We zoom out to discover that Elliot and Festor are literally wall to wall close to each other as the phone is close to the garage door; which is open, allowing Peg to casually walk out and see both idiots playing tug of war. In the real world; we have stupid criminals. In this show; we have stupid federal agents. Lovely! Peg guessed right as she goes over to Elliot and whispers in his ear. Elliot stops pulling and gets dragged towards the payphone as Elliot simply tells Festor to meet him in the freezer. So we scene change to Elliot in the freezer (for some cement shoes, natch) as Festor walks in. If you cannot guess what happens next...you guessed it. And damn; I'm so good to end the segment seventeen and a half minutes in. Peg's cackling in the background is MANY BUYS by the way.

After the commercial break; we see Festor pulling on the door while Elliot sits down on a wooden crate watching on as Winchell tells us that Elliot has hit rock bottom taking Fester Ness with him. Umm; if Elliot has hit rock bottom; then Elliot would be laying the smackdown on himself. Then they yell at Winchell to shut up right into the hard camera. Festor thinks that they are swiming with the fish sticks. So the water is drugged in Chicago? I ask because in DTVA; fish sticks is a sub for drugs, as heard in Save The Tiger in TaleSpin. Elliot wants some fish stick swimming too; but he wants to stop those gangsters from blowing up the Calmity Cola Factory. Then we get rumbling and crumbling as Festor is crying and he doesn't want to go now. We hear a muffled voice and Festor begs for mercy while Elliot has his head stuck in a entrance of a vent. Elliot doesn't call it judgment day; it's their way out as they go through the vent and pull off-screen causing them to go out onto the sidewalk and bury themselves with ice cubes. Festor is relieved as we jump cut to the streets of Chicago as Frank is driving the black car with Peg and wants to distance himself from them and the scene of the crime. Which one? I mean; you are going to blow up the Calamity Cola Factory which you already robbed earlier, so shouldn't be you two returning to the scene of the crime? Peg then notices the ice cube burial site with the two babyfaces and gasps in horror before yelling at Frank to run them over. Ah; vehicular homicide, the go to plot device that keeps on giving in shows where you cannot shoot to kill anyone. Even though we saw that earlier in the episode as the babyfaces dodge them and Elliot deduces that they are trying to kill them. You don't say?! The car comes back as the babyfaces panic because we bring out the machine gun and shoot to kill again. It's extremely rare outside of TaleSpin to see an episode go over 0.5 Trigun and this is over 0.5 Trigun right now. The shots make outlines of the babyface while they are shaking in a much different position. Because BS&P....you guessed it. Elliot finally gets that they are trying to kill them, so we have about a half dozen references to death now in this episode. Elliot and Fester bail stage left to warn the Calamity Cola Factory as Peg and Frank chase after them, which is perfect because they are now just leading the slaughterhouse to the pigs, if you catch my drift. Peg motions to Frank to come with her stage right due to a shortcut....

And so we jump cut to right in front of the Calamity Cola Factory's front door with Elliot panting like crazy. Fester and Elliot meet and then opens the doors thinking they won; but there is Frank and Peg inside shaking up bottles of soda. Elliot gets sprayed in the chest and Elliot sells it so dramatically that he would be laughed out of an Xavier Woods audition for being too realistic. Thankfully; Fester shakes him and tells him it's only Cream Cola. Yeah; I would feel more sorry for the cola than Elliot here; such a waste of perfectly decent cough medicine. Oh; and Goofy hears ticking and thinks it's his heart; but it's really a giant TNT bomb attached to a large muffler on a conveyer belt. There is an alarm clock on top as Peg and Frank go up the stairs and slam the door on the way out. Elliot and Fester walking slowly towards the bomb claiming that this is a standard FBI crisis situation. Elliot asks what they should do as Festor brings out a book for chapter five which is time bomb. Wait; so you didn't bother to go over that chapter beforehand. The FBI in the 1920's seriously needs to heal thyself right now...Oh wait; let's try that agai...POW! OUCH! Ummm...

Kit: This is your website! You can say whatever the hell you want to; so STOP repeating that stupid idiot joke!
Gregory: Okay; I will. Once you dress like Chris Jericho.
Kit: I don't understand you sometimes.

So we bring back the narrator as we see a picture of a dog agent looking at a bomb. Shots of the bomb ticking. Jump cut to a page of the dog being blown up with effects as the narrator calls the FBI a bunch of idiots and tells them to panic. Geez; I think we have all of that down already; so tell them how to defuse the bomb, you stupid idiot! So Elliot and Festor panic and take the bomb. They run upstairs into an office which apparently Atlas makes his return in a fish tank; in which the babyfaces put the bomb (complete with old missile on bottom) into the fish tank. The gold fish holds onto the alarm clock with it's eyes bouncing like crazy and then jumps into a clear vase of roses submerged in water. The bomb keeps ticking as the babyfaces wonder what to do; and then they go to the freezer and drag the fishtank into the freezer. The fishtanks freezes within seconds, which means that it's a really deep freeze which should have froze Elliot and Frank solid. It didn't and somehow this causes the alarm clock to stop, somehow. Elliot unpops the ice bomb from the fishtank as Festor wonders how to stop Frank and Peg. Elliot has an idea as he puts Festor on the icecube with him and they are surfing on an ice cube out of the soda factory. If you cannot guess the final bump...you guessed it. There is screaming glore with going under the bus, so sliding under a bus is much more worse than getting thrown under one, I guess. Elliot and Festor ramp off a conveniently placed manhole cover and fall off. Okay; I didn't see that one coming as the ice cube bomb breaks open to reveal just the bomb...right in front of Frank and Peg. Peg and Frank drop down in front of the bomb holding their heads. I am one hundred percent certain, this would NOT protect me from sharpnel injuries. The alarm clock dings and there is...nothing. AND THE ROCKS SAYS NOTHING! Frank gets up and dismisses the bomb as a dud...and then the bomb blows up in Frank's face. Okay; I didn't see that one coming, so kudos to the writers for that one. The smoke clears and in the confusion, Peg Doll and Frank Nutti are handcuffed as Elliot reads a book claiming that they have the right to remain silent, and the right to spill their guts and really blow it for themselves. Now THERE'S an FBI agent that I could get behind...and in front of. Then we end with a really hilarious; but still logic break all the same: Elliot takes the heels' picture and as the xenon flash occurs, the picture shows Elliot and Festor in the same shot when the babyface were nowhere near the shot. This segueways back to the living room of Goofy's. By the way; I confused Goofy with Elliot no less than fifteen times in this episode...

John Cena: That is bandlerdash! Fifteen times in the same episode; that's insane! It was....twenty three times you confused Goofy with Elliot!

Anyhow; Goofy has finished his story as it's cold for no good reason because Max is chattering teeth and Waffles is screaming. So they head into the kitchen and the whole place is ice cold and filled with ice as Waffles has his tongue stuck in the catbowl on the floor. Ooops! Speaking of guys who need to take responsbility more seriously, and speaking of rendering a great story absolutely pointless. Max slides in to unpop Waffles tongue from the bowl as Goofy goes over to the freezer and falls on his ass while trying to close it. Max comes in and shows off Goofy's hypocrisy (and his lack of orders of magnitude in terms of responsbility) as they have lots of ice now; and that ends the episode 21:13. Now this was an awesome story with a better, albeit rushed ending. Plus; it's difficult to take Goofy seriously about responsbility when Goofy is so forgetful that he does something much worse than Max leaving the ice cube trays empty for no reason. So there you go. **** 1/2 (90%).


THE REVIEW LINE

Well; we finally have a thumbs up episode on this disc set after a number if misfires as it was a funny, surprisely well written episode of Goofy's uncle bringing the funny as only he can and Peg being awesome as a heel. It's basically Robin Goof with a much better ending, even if it was rushed. The moral was dumb because it Goofy; and trying to take anything he says seriously is only going to make whatever point he was making pointless. I mean; Max pretty much showed that his mistake of not filling the ice cube trays was much less of a problem than Goofy leaving the freezer door open. Goofy's brainfart had worse consequences than Max's and that rendered the moral as tacked on rather than something that could be useful. It was just there to bring in the story. Otherwise; this was a funny episode with the usual Sunwoo botchery and dumbass moments. By the way; PJ was not in this episode despite IMDB's claim that he was. I'm guessing Rob Paulsen was voicing a cameo characters, no idea who it was. So; overall, I loved this episode and it was a remedy for that Buckley's soda pop mixture I had to witness. So...

Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you all next time.

 

Back To Goof Troop Index!

Return to the Rant Shack!

Return to the Unofficial Kit Cloudkicker Homepage