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Fish Hooks
Baldwin The Super Fish/Dances With Wolf Fish Rant
Reviewed: 01/18/2011
Baldwin Is A Smart Seahorse...And A Shady One At That!
Well; we begin our next series of episodes with a really interesting one as Milo thinks Baldwin is living a double life as a superhero. Come to think of it; is Milo trying to get Baldwin over? Is he breaking the cardinal rule that adults cannot get over in the New Disney? Then we continue on with another short involving the conflicts between Oscar and Milo as they find new playmates. Somehow; I think Oscar is being set up for some kissy-kissy from a certain teenage clam if you catch my drift.Yeah; let's rant on shall we...?!
Baldwin The Super Fish is written and storyboard is done by Carl Faruolo. The story is done by Tim McKeon and directed by William Reiss. Dances With Wolf Fish is written and storyboard is done by Niki Yang. The story is done by Jacqueline Buscarino and directed by William Reiss. All episodes are done in Flash; with CGI animals in the background. Heh.
Baldwin The Super Fish: We begin this one with the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM (sign: Comics. Must be Jack Chick tracts too) as Bud The Pet Store Guy is lying down on the job reading a comic listening to his favorite redneck tunes. Whatever turns you on honey. We zoom into the ROMAN ARENA OF DEATH and then into Baldwin's classroom as Baldwin is lecturing his students again. It's the no service promo as we cut to the classmates Albert, Oscar and Fimberly writing down notes while Milo is doing absolutley nothing on the right pan sitting on the desk groaning. Okay; before someone asks: Yes; I am aware of the obvious logic break that Baldwin should still be working at Fish Flakes in Bea Becomes an Adult Fish; I'm also aware that Milo should not be in Baldwin's class anymore from Fail Fish. This is probably a good reason why I would prefer TaleSpin's tact of hitting the rest button than when Fish Hooks does it because at least in TaleSpin; we know why the reset button was pushed. Here there is no explanation of why the characters are back in midseason form. Oh and Milo is as bored as I am watching Baldwin's lectures.
Milo then pokes Oscar in the right eye and Oscar naturally blows him off. Yeah; and we hear blah's in the background which went out of style even for toddlers back in 1986 as Milo takes a backpack and eats a cookie. Oscar steals said backpack and comic books magically comes out of nowhere. Oscar blows him off since Milo is stealing his snacks and the comic book is Captain Aquarium (because Aqua Man is trademarked already by DC or Marvel. It's hard to keep track.) as Milo starts reading it and Oscar wants it back because Milo is going to get them caught. Milo has that look of "I'm going to screw your mind Oscar" as Milo proclaims that CA is the best super fish hero in the sea and Oscar pleads for the comic book back. I betcha Milo no sells and Baldwin catches him and steals the comic book away. I check the Youtube video....Damn; I'm so good. It took about thirty seconds of Milo blowing off CA for having a boring disguise; but I'm still so good.
Baldwin blows Milo off for reading stuff that fills his head with ideas that are not approved by the Fish Board of Education. Yeah; I make the FBE up; but it's implied just the same as Baldwin goes to his desk and stuffs the backpack in his drawers (NOT THOSE ONES!) to keep forevermore. Then Baldwin gets a ring and he answers his cellphone. Then he panics and stuffs a dummy version of himself at the desk and proclaims that he needs to leave due to car trouble. Riiiiigggghhhhhttttt Baldwin. Like going out the window and taking an off-screen bump into a trashcan filled with cat signals car trouble. Milo turns out to be the smartest guy in the room as Oscar is more concerned with Baldwin stealing his backpack of cookies. Milo manages to find the comic book and proclaims that Oscar is banned from reading Captain Aquarium because Baldwin is Captain Aquarium. Sadly; that would have been more convincing if the boring guy in the room in the comic book was a seahorse; or even a fish for that matter. Oscar thinks that Milo is inhaling bathroom water again which is kind of silly for a drug reference; then again inhaling Kool-Aid is trademarked so there you go. Milo claims that Baldwin gets secret phone calls (which would have made more sense if Baldwin didn't answer the cellphone in front of the class) as Oscar gleefully answers that one for me. Milo then invokes the obvious logic break and Oscar gleefully answers that one for me too by claiming every seahorse looks like that. This puts evidence to my theory that new Disney doesn't want adult characters to get over in DTVA. Then Milo shows a panel that claims that he has car trouble and Oscar thinks Milo is an idiot and then catches himself as CA always has car trouble. Oscar cannot believe this is happening and he and Milo pulls their arms together and want Bea into the action.
Scene changer as we go to the back of the class as Bea is drinking tea at her desk and reading the newspaper. Wow; that is the classiest thing I have ever seen from her. We see that we are in journalism class as creepy looking frog furry creeps down to his desk and asks Bea how the class is coming. Bea proclaims that it's great and she's finished reading. Dr. Frog (I guess since there is only one frog in this show and he looks like a cross between a deranged Kermit and Fred Flintstone) tries to explain that it's more than just reading the facts and then panics and gasps for air. HAHA! Dr. Frog is voiced by Kevin MacDonald who started as various characters on the show Kids In The Hall in 1988-1995 and also wrote for the series and spin offs. He also wrote for the Martin Short Show and Carpoolers! Then it's Senior Trip, The Wrong Guy and Saving Souls short before starting in cartoons with Johnny Bravo. He then became Pastor Dave in That's 70 Show. Lilo & Stitch The Series as Pleakley (and several OAV's and shorts) was his DTVA appearance. He has 61 credits to his resume along with nine writing credits. Dino Dan, Word Girl, Keyhole and The Kids in The Hall: Death Comes to Town are his most recent credits. Dr. Frog jumps up to a board and croak proclaiming that he's okay. Well; in case he is clearly so no worries about breaking logic as he leaps down again. Okay; he tells Bea that it's about writing the news and I see he also channels the WHAT? crap from the WWE. JERRY DEVITT CALL YOUR OFFICE~! Or whoever WWE's legal captain is now.
Dr. Frog basically tells her that she has two days to write a story and Bea panics because no one told her that part and she cannot come up with one in two days. Yeah; Bea is a slacker; what did you expect. Bea face plants the desk as Dr. Frog proclaims that the class is not easy and that's why the classroom is empty as he gasps for air and floats to the surface while Bea floats out of class. Bea wonders what to do as Oscar and Milo float to her and proclaim that they have made a great discovery. They give her the comic book as they claim that Baldwin is Captain Aquarium as Bea isn't so sure because Baldwin is the typical DTVA adult. Okay; she was a lot more direct than I am in terms of personality. Can you blame me for being someone who is 33 years old and wanting Disney to do the job of entertainment instead of being a demographics company? Bea wonders if this is a real story; or a Milo story and Oscar defends her brother by bulging out his real eyes. Oooookkkkkkkaaaayyyyyy Oscar. Bea reads and proclaims that this is the story to pass journalism class and it's all diddy-doo. Whatever Bea.
Scene changer as we go out into the city of Fishbrook (I have no clue what the town's name is; so I'm going to use this until I get confirmation on the name of the city) as Milo, Oscar and Bea walk the "mean streets". And I mean that in the nicest way possible. Bea has something with her that looks like a sock as she wants absolute proof of this as Oscar proclaims that they wait until Baldwin changes to Captain Aquarium. Milo points to a comic book panel that CA fights giant monsters and even sezs Gad Zooks which is really rare to say in 2011! And then the comic book is dropped and we see a giant lizard like yellow snake wrapping itself around a building as the denizens of Fishbrook panic and bail like fried fish. Hmmmmm; fried fish. SLURP! POW! OUCH! Ummmmmm.....Wow; did one of the trenchcoat bailers yell OH MY GOD when Mr. Baldwin gets out of his car at 5:27? Or was it OH MY COD? Either way; that is a good swear weither dubbed anime style or not. Baldwin is pissed as he takes off his glasses and Milo thinks it's all alright....and then he waddles right into the Eyeglass Repair Shop. HAHA! I'm guessing Mr. Baldwin is far-sighted. Then he instantly walks back with glasses on proclaiming that the prices are destroying the city. Wah sounds ensue. This would have been a lot more convincing is the joke was "I'm having trouble with my glasses" and make Milo look like an idiot; otherwise it is Just There To Suck (JTTS is known in wrestling lingo as Jobber To The Stars; which is what Baldwin is turning into).
Oh and Bea has a camera as Milo reads the comic books and proclaims that CA also captures dangerous bank robbers. The comic book panel drops and we go to the Fishbrook National Bank (my words; not theirs) as the alarm sounds, Baldwin floats to the bank and the police show up. Oh goody; we finally are going to see bullet shooting guns pulled in the new Disney! Bea has her camera on as Baldwin slams open the door; we see several fish inside horrified and a guy in black gear welding a fish hook. Okay; that works as a threatening weapon in the context of this series so I'll let the lack of bullet shooting weapons slide. Or and there are two of them with fish hooks (HA!) and Baldwin screams and runs away like a scalded seahorse. Wow; this is so not cool. The babyfaces are SHOCKED and APPALLED. If it's for the burial of adults in the new Disney; then they get my vote; even Bea. Milo then gets another brainstorm as CA changes his suit in a phone booth (note the dog in the cage yells help in every comic panel? Sadist cartoon drawers!) as the comic panel drops and we see Baldwin going into a phone booth. He then rips off his shirt and takes a nap in the phone booth. HAHA!
The babyfaces are SHOCKED and APPALLED as Bea panics and pulls her eye sockets proclaiming that this is hopeless (in the worst acting possible) as Milo shuts her trap and she literally bites her tongue on cue. Oscar proclaims that Bea has a point about this and Oscar is forced to literally bite his tongue due to Milo having four fins. Oookkkkkayyyyy. See; superheroes only stop one kind of crime which Bea gets wrong of course as Milo calls them super villains. Oscar is surprised as Milo does a circle motion with his arm as he has a Krackpotkin plan cooking. Milo asks if he has that wizard's costume from the RPG something last week and Oscar has the white mustache and gets giddy. Milo wants to do this thing and this is going to backfire in their faces I swear to god. So we get the Scene changer as we head to Mr. Baldwin's apartment AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) as we head to Mr. Baldwin's room asleep in his bed in pink night gear. Oh I see that he is STILL waiting for that baby to be born judging by the rocking cradle and boat toy ceiling fan which has a milk bottle (!) and a gnome on it (!!). Okay; that gnome figure use is unique if nothing else. We hear a bang on the door and Baldwin almost swallows something as we see Bea outside and there's a wine bottle on the floor near the door. I do not know why it is there as Baldwin answers the door in a pink bunny PJ suit. Oh lord help us all. Bea pleads for his help because Milo is in great danger as Baldwin panics and wants the panic button. Bea proclaims that there is no time and she's packed a water suit in his car. Baldwin is surprised to hear that.....
So we then see Baldwin driving a car over the ramp into the air and onto the table where the fish food is stored. Bea cannot believe that Baldwin is saving Milo and then flashes him with the camera three times at least while Baldwin is driving. Ummm; I think that is illegal guys. Anyhow we stop at the end of the shelf as Oscar is in his wizard robe and has a prop sword while Milo is caged in a water glass. This is NOT going to work because Oscar is not wearing his water suit and the glass should be upside down so Milo cannot easily escape. If Baldwin doesn't realize the obvious; then it's proof that new Disney hates adults. Bea twiddles her thumbs and does the worst acting I have ever heard since her performance in Fail Fish and Baldwin absolutely no sells. YAY! There is hope in the new Disney after all. Oscar addresses himself as Wizard Worm (Lame!) and stammers and then gets sprayed by the water suit. Okay; scratch one logic break at least. Oscar "threatens" them out of the car; or he "means business to do nasty stuff on Milo". No, not really. Bea and Baldwin get out of the car (You Fish Hook fans have better eyesight than I do; what does that orange sign read that you think is so funny? ) and Baldwin calls out Oscar. YAY! At least one adult is not an idiot in the new Disney!
Oscar wants one second and hops over Milo and Milo tells him that Oscar is an evil super villian and that will make him change. At least Milo is acting well on this as Oscar cannot act to save his life here as Baldwin no sells all. Milo wants Baldwin to try and Baldwin no sells as Oscar proclaims that he's not trying. NO?! REALLY? Man; Baloo had more success even with a mustache than this. I see Baldwin was watching TaleSpin after all where no laughing is required to enjoy it. Milo wants to step this up a notch (Too late Milo; Baldwin is not stupid and not stupider than you.) so Milo proclaims that if he doesn't try than Wizard Whatever Milo said is going to tip the glass over into the shark tank and we see the shark tank for real. Wow; Milo actually thought a plan through? WHAT ARE THE ODDS OF THAT? Oscar does more "threats" and then pushes the glass of water as Baldwin demands that Oscar and Milo get into the car to go home. I still cannot make out what the orange sign said other than Baby. Baldwin bounces over and grabs an end of the glass as Milo proclaims that Baldwin is heroic. They lift the glass up and Bea takes Baldwin's picture and Baldwin's eyes go anime fuzzy and that's enough for the glass to tip over and Oscar and Milo fall into the shark tank water below. Okay; that's a good way to make Baldwin look stupid without actually making him stupid.
Baldwin swears in DUBBED ANIME STYLE (oh dear gosh which kills the continuity of the OH MY COD swears the short was shooting for) and tries to jump in but Bea grabs his tail as Baldwin grabs the top of the glass as Milo thinks he's saved. Baldwin proclaims that he's not saved because his arms are giving out. Bea then ribs him about the super powers and Baldwin proclaims that he has none. Geez; what a shock that is? You would think that Baldwin running away from a fish hooking robber would have been enough to prove thee otherwise. Milo and Bea call him out on CA and Baldwin asks about what comic which Oscar shows while hanging onto the bottom of the glass which should be impossible for a fish and Baldwin blows it off and then the grips of all is lost and they all fall into the shark tank in Powerpuff Girls Slow Motion. The babyfaces all pop up as Milo finally realizes his folly; but is glad that they have lived. Bea is all right with that until she screams at Milo because here comes Mr. Shark with fork and knives who wants them over to dinner.....Is this the end of our heroes? Ummmm.....
.....no. We head inside to Mr. and Mrs. Shark's dining room as the fish are all invited to have dinner with them. Like that was a shock to anyone who watches DTVA knows that the main babyfaces cannot die. Mrs. Shark gives Milo an apple and Milo thanks her and eats it. Mrs. Shark is voiced by Tara Strong who is one of the most notable actresses who has made a name for herself in America and Canada which is quite rare. She began her career as Ame in My Pet Monster in 1987 and Garbage Pail Kids as Patty Patty among others. Then she voice characters in the Nelevana edition of the Care Bears, Sylvanian Families as Bridget, Young Celeste in Babar, Bertha in Beetlejuice, and even Tutu in Little Bear. Quack Pack is her DTVA debut and was Spot in 101 Dalmations: The Series, Buzz Lightyear of Star Command as Bonnie, Pepper Ann as Brenda, Kandi in The Weekenders, Hazel in The Legend of Tarzan, Recess, Filmore as Ingrid The Third, Bebe Proud in the Proud Family, Dawn on The Buzz on Maggie, Gaberilla in Brandy & Mr. Whiskers, Lilo & Stich The Series as Bebe Proud (during the Proud Family/Sitch crossover), The Oracle Twins in American Dragon: Jake Long, Tara in Kim Possible, Porcupine in My Friends Tigger & Pooh and Sierra McCool in The Replacements. She has over 285 titles to her resume. The Fairly Oddparents Movie as Poof, and Strange Frame: Love & Sax as Naia X are her most recent credits. She is infamous for being one character I hate a lot: Timmy Turner in Fairly Oddparents. Ummm; yeah thanks Miss Strong. Way too many to try to list here.
Anyhow; Baldwin is shocked that they went through all this trouble because he was a superhero and Oscar and Milo hold their faces and blush. My reaction is the exact same as Baldwin's: whatever. Crickets chirp as Oscar apologizes and asks if Baldwin is mad. Baldwin proclaims that he should be; but he's honestly flattered by being called a superhero and that he hasn't got Friday entertainment since 1986 and does the blushes spot. Okay; that gives me a chuckle. Everyone but Bea laughs on cue and she ruins it by yelling at everyone of course. What a rude girl this Bea fellow is; trying to bury Baldwin for trying to get over?! See; if she doesn't come up with proof of a story then she will fail journalism class. Baldwin sees the problem and decides that he is going to bail her out as he wants duct tape and a cape because he has a story to save. That's right; Baldwin is going to fake a story to save Bea's ass. I know that I should point out how immoral that is; but considering all the other shows out there; this is high class in comparison; so it's hard for me to get offended over it.
So we head to the ROMAN ARENA OF DEATH and to Bea's class as she has her report (in pink I might add) as she straightens her papers and here comes Mr. Creepy Frog as Bea gives him the report calling it all tubular (I thought that word died with Mike from TMNT back in 1996!) and all "true". Scare quotes intentional. I hope Mr. Frog doesn't buy this and fails her; seriously I do. Sadly; he reads the report as Baldwin is doing silly stuff and carrying a car and Mr. Frog thinks this is enough and Bea gets an A+. Like I said; there is one adult who is not an idiot. Dr. Frog does win the honor of being high on drugs though and still not come off as funny or endearing. Now creepy on the other hand.....Bea does the blush spot and Dr. Frog panics, gasps for air, bumps for three guys and rises to the board above off-screen. We see Baldwin at the door and Bea/Oscar/Milo and Baldwin do the thumbs up spot. Baldwin pushes Oscar and Milo aside and looks serious as that ends the short at 10:20 approx. Not a bad episode; but the ending was a bit of a downer for me. *** 1/2 (70%).
Dances With Wolf Fish: We begin this one with the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM (sign of the day: cleaning supplies) as Bud The Pet Store Guy is invokes the SHANE DOUGLAS MOP OF DOOM on the floor. What a loser eh? POW! OUCH! Ummmm....And then a parrot literally carries Bud away stage right by his beck. Okay; that was pretty funny. So we cut to a shot of a doorbell as Bea has her groceries as she rings the bell. No answer so she tries again and calls for them because she wants to do some fantasy football. Umm; since they are fourteen; I think underage gambling is illegal. Bea calls it strange as she opens the door and international objects get thrown out; the place is filled with green slime and Milo is getting blamed for it all. Milo greets Bea at the door which indicates to me that Oscar is showing off. Milo claims that he was only trying to make a sandwich and Oscar got into a rage for no reason at all. Apparently; it's NEVER Murphy's fault Milo. Yeah; I made that up, but then again Bea is the one who rescued him....allegedly. Oscar rushes in and introduces Milo to Senor Broom which is the RIC FLAIR BROOMSTICK OF DOOM. I see Slick Rick was taking Spanish lessons since we last saw it. Milo hates Senor Broom and Oscar thinks Milo is daring it. Now Oscar must face the wrath of....Senor Tickle?! HAHA! Oscar is horrified and runs back in in fear. I see Oscar has the Kit Cloudkicker touch sense as Bea calls them crazy. NO?! REALLY?! Oscar pleads for mercy and Milo drops him and tickles him. Oscar no sells it (BOO! HISS!) as Milo hates cleaning and Oscar hates tickling. I think Kit has a much better case than you Oscar. Memo to Justin Roiland: Watch Polly Wants A Treasure where Kit is tickled and takes notes on R.J. Williams' acting.
Then it turns into the FCC FRIENDLY CLOUD DUST OF DOOM as Bea breaks it up. Well; at least she has some class and hate for BS&P. Bea calls them out for pointless fin roughness and then notices that the place is a mess. Oscar thanks her as Bea asks Milo is he's leaving a trail and Milo just lies there next to the blood smearing trail. Whatever guys; it's not working and it's a clear BS&P decision. Bea proclaims that this is so bad that she takes her text messenger and takes a picture and mails it to Shellsea and Shellsea gets her one word in before Bea turns text messenger off. Bea wonders if there is some way to work this out and Oscar proclaims that it's impossible for them to work this out and Milo agrees because Oscar has Senor Broom, Mop and Squeegee. Yeah; that sounds quite impossible Milo; sure. They argue some more as Oscar wants to break up and throws his laughing skull ring down. Milo blows him off and then gets whacked by a blue toothbrush by Oscar as Oscar drops the brush before emoting big eyes and then drops his pants to reveal his underwear. Compared to Kick Buttowski; this is the first real low class effort by Milo to get over. At least Cory Baxter sounds more interesting and Milo can emote properly. Oscar wants his underwear back; but Milo no sells and slowly teases an apology before finally walking out on the door and splatters his body on the door allowing Oscar to blow him off once again for slobbering the door before Milo finally floats away sulking. Milo storms into Bea's house with Mom and Dad greeting him and then walks into Coach Salmons house and Salmons is SHOCKED and APPALLED. Well; of course you are Richard Simmonfish. Milo goes through the gate and proclaims that he is going to find some new buddies to play with and then a wolf fish sniffs his underwear. Seriously; that is what it does. The sign said Don't Litter; so the wolf fish bails and litters mud all over Milo's head. Whatever guys; you wish you were Spongebob Squarepants.
The wolf fish dives into a mud pool which is pouring mud like a waterfall as Milo calls it the most disgusting thing he has ever seen....and so he cannonballs into the lake of mud and enjoys himself. HAHA! Well; it might not make much sense since Milo isn't really that messy; but he's better than Kick Buttowski; so who cares? We then see more wolf fish gathering at a bone wood fire (I think) as Milo gets more giddy. By the way; the Wolves Fishes are voiced by Dee Bradley Baker who started with Shnookums & Meat Funny Cartoon show as Dog which is his first DTVA appearance. His DTVA appearances include Timon & Pumbaa as a paperboy, Bagheera in Jungle Cubs, Lilo & Stitch The Series as Merwin, The Buzz on Maggie, WITCH as Frost The Hunter, various characters in American Dragon: Jake Long, Handy Manny as Turner The Screwdriver, Ace Palmero in The Replacements, My Friends Tigger & Pooh as Buster , Mickey Mouse Clubhouse as various characters and Phineas & Ferb as Perry. He has over 265 credits to his resume and most of them are cartoons from 2000 onwards. The rumored Hanna as FBI solider is this most recent credit. Way too many to try to list but a few include: Appa/Momo in Avatar: The Last Airbender, Lance Thunder in Danny Phantom, Cinderblock in Teen Titans, Wolves in Totally Spies (!!!), and even did animal sound effects for Dora The Explorer.
Milo goes over and hugs and kisses the wolf fish and calls them silly names; including naming a male wolf with an eyepatch a female name. HAHA! I'll leave the names as an exercise to the reader. Brown wolf fish growls out asking if they should eat him and the grey wolf doesn't know. Well; it's tough to eat someone and not look like a bigot when Milo is acting like a moron. Scene changer as we return to Oscar's place which has four fish tanks for no other reason other than to break logic. See; Oscar is looking of auditions for someone to be his new roommate. How about Bea Oscar? You are usually with her and she IS your future husband; so just go and pull the trigger on the damn thing okay? Oh; and Albert, Clamantha and Jocktopus are in the lineup. I believe Clamantha has appeared in all but three episodes in this series thus far. We head to Oscar's makeshift office as Bea proclaims with the stack of papers that there are a lot of qualified boys as Oscar is happy to see. Bea yells out for #1 which is Albert Glass as we have the spotlight on Albert Glass who actually gives Oscar a really good reason to be his room mate; but makes the fatal error of drinking and the drink is shown in his insides which creeps Oscar out. Damn; he was so close too. This would have also made sense if Oscar and Albert didn't show up during Fail Fish doing the RPG gig. Oscar calls for the next guy and he's Jocktopus as he lasts about ten seconds before Oscar calls for a next. I thought Oscar would say next in half that time as next up is Bo Gregory as he brings his cow Bessie who is a real cow. Jeepers; did we NEED the finish from Doggonit in the middle of this? Wow; my respect for Bo has gone down about two notches.
Bea calls for a next is Mr. Mansa as we see a clam with brown wig and a cowboy hat and black mustache. Oh come on; like I'm buying that it isn't Clamantha in disguise?! The crappy Granny voice gives her away as Oscar no sells (YAY!) and calls for a next. Sadly; Clamantha tries on about a dozen disguises including white bunny ears and the dreaded snowman clam. HAHA! Oscar and Bea no sell her anyway. So next up is the orange fish with blond hair and a red car called Steve Jackson who rest on the hood of his car. Oscar proclaims that he is the coolest dude in school which should give away who is really playing him (Bea does her face with makeup) as Steve Jackson (Greg Cripes - guy who plays one of Brad Buttowski's friends in Kick Buttowski) spits a pearl. BWHAHAHAHA! I'm not fooled C-L-A-M-A-N-T-H-A! Neither are Bea and Oscar as Steve Jackson unzips to reveal Clamantha. HAHA! You would think we would buy that one after Doris Flores Gorgeous. Oscar sulks; but Bea isn't giving up yet as she dials her cellphone and calls for more fliers and more boys in a shriek before floating out stage left. Oscar sulks and then we hear Mr. Stickler the principal enter asking if he is still accepting applications as Mr. Stickler is wheeled in with her green vaccum cleaning nurse. Stickler calls for the nurse (her name sounds like Fishington; but he talks too fast for me to make out the name) to give Oscar the application which Oscar gets and he's impressed. We also discover that Stickler is moving in because his house is getting fumigated as Oscar likes him ; but feels that it's sick and wrong in roundabout terms to have Stickler stay with a student. Which is actually an valid point; but this is Fish Hooks; so real world logic doesn't apply.
Anyhow; he then cleans and shines the entire room from ceiling to floor and it sparkles like Sunwoo on a bad acid trip. Oscar is SHOCKED and HAPPY to see this as he accepts Stickler as his room mate. And the moral guardians are up in arms so to speak as we even get Oscar singing out it with Stickler cleaning the house of course. Oh we find out both guys are OCD and they have the Dave The Barbarian fetish most kids love to hate. This segues into Milo in the mud singing the same song with the wolf fish as they do the mud version of synchronized swimming. They chase deer and brush teeth and do wolf things while I watch on. It's another lame song; but at least they aren't using the audio sweetener to make their voices sound like they are singing legit. We dance; we change backgrounds and Milo dances in his underwear as I yawn. We end with the howling of the moon by the wolf fish and Milo and then cut to the far shot of the tanks in the pet store. Then we cut to Milo sleeping on the ground in his underwear. The howling wind wakes Milo up as Milo wants Oscar to turn off the AC as Milo goes to the glass and wipes it clean and notices Oscar and Stickler reading to each other on the opposite side of the pet store. Wait; I thought Milo was only three tanks down from Oscar's house. That's the first logic break of the episode nearly eight minutes in. Milo shakes like a leaf and blows off Oscar's fireplaces and his sleepy time stories. Milo floats down and tries to cuddle with gray wolf fish; but it slaps Milo away stage right with a decent off-screen bump.
Scene changer as we see a television airing a smiling fly. We see Oscar laughing at the couch as Stickler doesn't appear to be amused. Oscar asks why he doesn't like the show and Stickler proclaims that flys carry diseases and make lots of babies. Oscar tries to reason with him that it's just a show with a guy in a fly costume; but Mr. Stickler panics and grabs onto Oscar's head because he wants to attack the fly-man. So Oscar throws Stickler into the television set and destroys it in the process. Oscar panics thinking that he killed his own principal; but Stickler pops up with broken glasses and a television on his head proclaiming that they got him. Then his spikes break slowly off with the television and Oscar panics badly....and Stickler grows new spikes. See; urchins can regenerate their spikes which I'm not going to comment if this is bull-crap or not. Oscar looks SHOCKED and HORRIFIED (in that order) as he asks what monster did he invite in his house as we go to the scene changer as Milo is freezing into ice. He wonders what monsters he decided to invite himself to as he goes to the broken down fridge and opens it as there is only a bottle of ketchup left. Milo takes it and teases drinking it; but recoils and splatters it on his body like blood saying that he was just kidding. Yeah; whatever. He bathes in it and then the wolf fish wake up and they growl like crazy. They look rabid as Milo backs up and pleads for mercy and failing badly at it. The wolf fish back him up against the wall as Milo is seriously (insert swear word here) as he realizes that they want to eat him as Oscar would never try that.So we head back to Oscar's place as Oscar is trying to sleep; but Stickler invokes the VACUUM CLEANER OF DEATH and now this episode really sucks. HAHA!
Ron Sparks: It sucks more than Sean Desmond.
Anyhow; Oscar panics like crazy as Stickler proclaims that Oscar is acting like his last landlord as no one likes his epic cleaning as he turns around the garbage bag and there inside is Fishington with vacuum marks on her body. Memo to Fishington: DUMP HIM NOW! HE'S A PSYCHOPATH! So Stickler turns on the vacuum cleaner full blast and steals Oscar's braces and tries to steal Oscar's eyeballs as Oscar screams that he wishes Milo was here and in comes Milo wanting to be here himself as Oscar is happy to see him. Milo panics because the wolf fish are trying to eat him as they break into Oscar's house. Oscar and Milo grab each other like Shaggy and Scooby and both brothers agree that breaking up was a really bad idea after all as Oscar admits that there is such a thing as too clean. Milo agrees that there is such a place for Oscar's rules over the wolf fish flith. Oscar invokes SENOR BROOM as Milo isn't thrilled; but it has the brothers skull ring and Milo accepts it and they show off their skull rings in unison. Milo then asks about going to the Hokey Poke for some midnight snacks and Oscar agrees to the deal as they float away as Stickler is literally thrown to the wolf fish. Sadly; Stickler's vacuum cleaner has no effect on them as we REPEAT THE SEQUENCE FROM THE BEGINNING OF THE EPISODE! Whatever. Bea opens the door and we see Stickler wrestling with the wolf fish with the vaccum cleaner as the place is slimed again. Stickler asks if Bea wants a piece of this and Bea slams the door shut and floats away stage right to come back later to end the short at 10:20 approx. Just another Fish Hooks love in; with a funny sequence from Clamantha. *** (60%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Well; we got a bunch of middling shorts this time around. Baldwin The Super Fish was pretty good with the overall subtext of Milo thinking Baldwin was a superhero when clearly he was not and the subplot with Bea getting a story. Doctor Frog was absurdly high on drugs and quite creepy at times; but nothing over the top offense. The whole plan to trick Baldwin was silly and the ending was the wrong one where Bea should have failed the class instead of passing it with flying colors and it made Dr. Frog look stupid. On the other hand; Baldwin did a great job in showing that he does have the smarts to get past the new Disney hump as an adult; but the finish of him saving Bea's butt made him look shady which is only slightly better than being stupid. The sharks were nothing special and really having them over for dinner was the only finish the new Disney could do actually. Dances With Wolf Fish was pretty much the same deal: A pretty decent storyline with some logic breaking and Stickler acting like a psychopath which creeps me out quite a bit. I don't see having a principal being a room mate with a student to be endearing for obvious reasons. Milo with the wolf fish was funny for a while and then once the cold set in; it lost it's spark. Although the whole Clamantha disguise scene was too funny as usual from her since that's her best gimmick at this point. So overall; I give.....
Thumbs in the middle for both shorts and I'll see you all next time.