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Fish Hooks

Pamela Hamster Returns/Riding In Cars With Fish Rant

Reviewed: 06/28/2011

Milo Riding With Pamela Hamster And Fish!


Yippee! My return to ranting after my vacation and I got a real doozy of an episode as it's part two of Hamster Milo having to actually meet Pamela Hamster as she comes to Freshwater. Our second short features Oscar getting his drivers license with Mr. Mussels and Coach Richard Salmons. Oh joy! So let's rant on shall we...?

Pamela Hamster Returns is written and storyboards are done by Ian Wasseluk. The story is done by Justin Roiland and Jacqueline Buscarino. The direction is done by William Reiss and C.H. Greenblatt. Riding In Cars With Fish is written and storyboards are done by Derek Evanick. The story is done by Tim McKeon and directed by William Reiss and C.H. Greenblatt. All episodes are done in Flash; with CGI animals in the background. Heh.


Pamela Hamster Returns: We begin this one with the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM (Sign: Amateur Puppetry) as we head inside as Bud is putting on a puppet show for the dogs as the puppet blue dog MURDERS the pink cat with a stick. That is the first time in the series that a Bud segment actually made SENSE with the sign outside. If only they kept this up throughout the whole series. So we head to a close up of Milo's face as it's clear he is wearing the hamster suit again. Oh this is great! After all; Milo dressed up as a hamster equals MONEY, MONEY, YEAH, YEAH. Oh; and Pamela Hamster is a dirty rotten heart thief as we see her image on the computer in her dressing room claiming that she is now complete since seeing Milo in Hamsterwood. Milo claims that there is nothing fishy about him. I agree since his love for Pamela IS genuine. Milo does some kissy-kissy to the screen as we zoom out to Bea and Oscar playing video games on the couch. I see Bea is enjoying this while Oscar is blowing off Milo as usual.

Bea calls the couple happy as BS&P shifts Milo's lips to Pamela's right cheek on the screen. Pamela has a surprise which Milo think it's a go-kart. Sadly; it isn't as Pamela has finished filming her parody of The Wizards of Waverly Place and she has some time off now and so she's coming to Freshwater to see Milo in animal. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Milo is SHOCKED and APPALLED to hear that one. Milo then acts all pissy about it calling Pamela mean. Damn; I was loving this too as Pamela sulks about it; but gets a pep up by her heart throb Sterling Hamsterton (hamster in a black leather jacket).

Sterling Hamsterton is voiced by Jerry O'Connell and according to the USIMDB: Jeremiah O'Connell was born in New York City to Linda Witkowski (an art teacher) and Michael O'Connell (an advertising agency art director). He was raised in Manhattan with his parents and a younger brother, Charlie O'Connell, who's also an actor. He began his acting career at a very young age. He did commercial work and TV work before getting the role of "Vern Tessio" in the popular film Stand by Me (1986) opposite River Phoenix and Corey Feldman. After that, he worked on several TV-Movies and TV-series and had a starring role in "My Secret Identity" (1988). From 1991 to 1994, Jerry attended New York University where he majored in film, but he didn't graduate. In 1993, he starred in the film Calendar Girl (1993) opposite Jason Priestley. In 1995, he starred in the TV-movie western The Ranger, the Cook and a Hole in the Sky (1995) (TV) and, in 1996, he landed the role of "Frank Cushman" in the successful film Jerry Maguire (1996) opposite Tom Cruise. Over the next few years, he starred in Scream 2 (1997), had a small uncredited role in Can't Hardly Wait (1998), as well as appearing in several TV-movies and having starring roles in the TV-series "Sliders" (1995) and the film Body Shots (1999) opposite Sean Patrick Flanery and Tara Reid. In 2000, he appeared in the Brian De Palma film Mission to Mars (2000) with Gary Sinise, among others. He has also appeared in movies such as Tomcats (2001), Buying the Cow (2002), Kangaroo Jack (2003), Yours, Mine and Ours (2005), Man About Town (2006) and Room 6 (2006). In 2007, he married actress/model Rebecca Romijn and they are expecting twins in the winter of 2008. He started with Stand By Me as Vern Tessio in 1986 (!!!) and Fish Hooks is his DTVA debut. He has 60 credits to his resume. The Defenders as Pete Kaczmarek is his most recent credit. He also directed some episodes of Sliders and was Captain Marvel in The Justice League.

Sterling wants to have dinner with her over the weekend with her while reading some line as Milo is in panic mode. Pamela claims that Milo is busy and Milo is her real boyfriend; but Milo proclaims that he's too busy cleaning the place up for her arrival. Sterling blows it off since it's in Fish Downtown and therefore is not buying Milo as a hamster. Pamela is not happy to hear this; but Milo assures her that Sterling is lying. In a way he is; although not for obvious reasons. Pamela decides to come right over as the computer screen turns off by itself (logic break #1) and Milo calls this all awful. I beg to differ there sir. Bea and Oscar float in asking how he could invite Pamela here; and Milo didn't want Sterling to make off with Pamela. Apparently; Sterling has good looks (which Milo degrades in hilarious fashion when he makes a face), flowing hair and pecks. I don't know; Sterling looks like someone trying to be in a motorcycle gang; but looks too handsome to pull off the manliness. Milo drops his head on the desk as Bea calls this absurd because Pamela loves him for who he is. One problem Bea: Milo was WEARING A DAMN HAMSTER SUIT when Pamela fell in love with him. So; she doesn't 100% love him for who he is...yet.

Thankfully; Milo points that out for us as Bea agrees to help him until the love spirals out of control which it probably will. Milo likes this and then the door bell rings as Milo panics that she is here and finds two hamster suits OUT OF NOWHERE and gives them to Bea and Oscar to wear. At least Milo is justified somewhat because it's Pamela outside wearing a trenchcoat and an orange doo rag. Okay; that is different. Milo ask who it is and it's Pamela coming in as discretly as she could...and then we zoom out and see her custom jet plane in front of the fish tank. HAHA! Milo then has a big ass wrench (OUT OF NOWHERE too I bet) and goes over and shatters the opposite wall and that drains the tank right in front of the killer cat. Oooookkkkkkkaaaayyyy. Milo finally opens the door and calls her baby bear. So Milo DOES watch TaleSpin? Which is funny considering that TaleSpin hasn't been on the air since 2006. Must have the DVD sets as Pamela and Milo snuggle together. Pamela sees that Milo is all wet (symbolism!); as Milo claims that he stepped out of the shower. Pamela comes in as the area looks like a hamster sty. HAHA! Bea and Oscar are in hamster suits and do not know what to make of all this.

Pamela loves it as she calls the floor totally random. I don't understand this type of pop-culture speak. To me; random means mixed and I'm certain Pamela thought the floor was great. I'm an old fat; so shoot me. Pamela loves the place; but wonders why it smells like fish. Pamela proclaims to be on the lookout for fish because according to Sterling; they are weird and random. HAHA! He's got a point there; this is so weird and random (at least Pamela is using random in the correct context this time). The GOOFS WITH ATTITUDE AND HAMSTER SUITS look at each other as Milo lies through his fake buck teeth on this one. So does Bea and Oscar; and they yell eyes and the water packs wash their eyes out. Pamela asks about Milo's friends and Milo sobs like a little baby claiming that he's ruined. HAHA!

Bea comes over and claims that Milo knows how to put on a show. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Milo pushes Oscar forward and Oscar panics because he's still allergic to hamsters see and the fact that Pamela is SUPER EVIL when brothers are involved (check the face on Pamela at around the six minute mark) as Oscar sweats bullets again. Oscar's face freaks out and he runs away like a fried piece of hamster fish. Hmmmm...hamster fish. SLURP! POW! OUCH! Ummmm.... Pamela is glad to see him though; so Oscar is just a meanie. Milo stops Oscar from getting to the door (even though the door is locked shut) and pleads with Bea and Oscar not to leave. Bea and Oscar agree not to leave as Milo wants them to make sure no one blows their cover while they have a romantic candle light dinner. Methinks Milo is overdoing this routine. Milo's Krackpotkin plan is to throw a Spanish party on the outside since no one can resist a party. I beg to differ Milo. Me and Oscar would resist such party; albeit for different reasons (Oscar hates parties in general, I don't like parties that have more than one person invited).

So we cut to Pamela acting like a dog burying his bone as Milo and company bail outside to get some more shavings...ERRR...I mean throw the outside party to distract the romanatic dinner. So we head to Roman Central Fish Park as we see various cameos from other episodes (Barb from Bea Becomes an Adult Fish, Hugh Edminston from Doris Flores Goregous, etc.)  as Milo floats in with the MEGAPHONE OF JIMMY HARTS to announce an awesome party happening a couple of tanks to the east. Milo shows a paper to Koi Fish and Esgormargot which gives them their contracted lines and then Milo yells into the megaphone to wake up a sleeping Mr. Baldwin on a park bench. Which begs the question: Why is he sleeping on a park bench with newspapers? Did he lose his apartment or something? Or and Mr. Baldwin is invited as we head to Freshwater High as we hear Mr. Stickler on the PA announcing to the students in the hallway that there is an awesome party going on. So Milo, Oscar and Bea have been skipping school all this time? SHOCKING! No, not really. Fimblery is there; along with Jocktopus trying to beat down Albert Glass again and Albert shatters off-screen when he hits the floor. We head to the office as Milo has filers and Stickler tells Fishington rolls Stickler's chair (with Stickler in it of course) away because it's time to PAR-TIE. Sadly; no Epic Yarn pose from Fishington though. Damn you guys; throw me a bone here. Everyone leaves the school and despite not seeing her; Clamantha gets off her contracted lines. Geez; she has been buried HARD since Two Clams In Love. Milo floats out thinking everyone is out; so he does the Gadget Trick of Doom and shatters the fish tank glass wall with the big ass wrench.

So we return back as Milo opens the door; walks in and gets his eyes sprayed with the water tank. Pamela gets giddy as Milo proclaims that it's time for their date to start. Pamela invokes the word random for the fourth time in the short (and only once in the proper context) as they act like hamsters with buck teeth. So we logically segue into the TEDDY RUXPIN SONG OF DOOM (thankfully; Milo and Pamela do not sing) as Milo and Pamela do hamster spots to amuse me before the song suddenly stops as we head to Freshwater High School. Milo proclaims that he gets eight hours of sleep everyday in school. No, not really. Pamela is loving this even more as Milo's cellphone rings and Milo answers it as we see that the resturant is ready as that tank is drained out. The shoebox's name is called Likee Shoe in case you cared. Oscar informs him of this and Milo is relieved because he was running out of tanks to smash as we see every single tank in the pet store has been smashed and water leaking out. Geez; this is the most absurd form of vandalism I have ever seen in a long time. Remember the old days when vandalism was merely painting a offensive word and Nazi symbols on a side of a wall....or burning a cross in the front lawn? POW! OUCH! Ummmmm.... Milo realizes that he spoke too much and cuts the line dead before Oscar can respond properly. Milo giggles and then proclaims that he is going to put food in her now. In any other universe; the girl would run like hell after that line.

So we head to somebody's place (I'm guessing Bea's home judging by the surroundings) as the Cinco De Milo party begins which is the most boring Spanish party in history. I see Bo Gregory, Shellsea and finally Clamantha make an appearance. Sadly; only emo kid, Jocktopus, and two other fish are wearing Mexican hats. Shellsea proclaims that Milo lied because this is not an awesome party. NO?! REALLY?! Jumbo Shrimp and Albert Glass point out that the chip and dip ratio is all wrong as Clamantha goes all Speedy Gonzales on us, and then goes Dora The Explorer on the getaway. HAHA! Baldwin panics as he makes it to the door because the tanks are all smashed. NO?! REALLY?! Police Officer #1 (fish with black mustache) panics as someone should call the police. I see the irony is completely lost on him. That doesn't make me confrontable for him to serve as such as Chief appears OUT OF NOWHERE (which is par for the course with this short) as he thinks he knows who is behind this. NO?! REALLY?! Hey; if Pamela is allowed to say random four times in this short; then I'm allowed to respond NO?! REALLY?! three times in this rant.

So we head to the Likee Shoe Cafe as Milo and Pamela are sharing pizza together. And as I expected; it has a hamster wheel and candle lights. So Bea and Oscar (dressed as French waiters) arrive with the food pellets for Pamela (as given by Bea) while Oscar gives Milo a ham dinner and winks. HAHA! Yeap; this is turning into a Milo Moment here. Pamela proclaims that she doesn't want this to end and wants to move next door to him. UH OH! Seems Milo's Krackpotkin plan has spiraled out of control. Kind of normal for Milo Moments like this eh? Oscar is not happy to hear that one as Milo proclaims that they need to do this every day. Thankfully; for Oscar and Bea Chief smashes the front door down with his magically anthrosized foot. Everyone comes in as Pamela wants answers to this outrage as Milo is arrested by the cops and handcuffed for draining the fish tanks and failed to throw an awesome party. You wish you were as cool as Shere Khan in Louie's Last Stand buddy. So now Milo is Milo Fish instead of Fishtooth I see as Pamela protests this outrage because it's Milo Hamster see and his boyfriend. Milo finally decides the jig is up and blows his cover for real as Pamela is in SHOCK. So Pamela pulls on her tail and confesses that she's a geril. WHAT THE HELL?! That's the big surprise? So she's a gerbil. Big deal; that's merely one step up from hamster. She should have unzipped herself and become a fish to make it more relatable. Unless Pamela is being planned by the writer to COME BACK in season two or something (since being a fish ends her character right there basically). They embrace each other and Oscar is teary eyed and Bea consoles him; which makes Oscar blush. No really; I am as SHOCKED as you are.

So the officer cries and decides not to press charges after all. Oh that is so BS as Pamela and Milo hug with True Love background which is one of the few jackhammered background I actually like as the fish are in awe. I just don't get how this is so awesome since the big surprise isn't so big. Chief thankfully is NOT amused as helicopter sounds ensue and we see a helicopter and here comes Mr. Nibbles and Sterling down the rope to inform her that she is needed on the set of Hamster School Musical in five minutes. And Mr. Nibbles hates the fish smell of course as he jackhammers that joke to the ground. Sterling sweeps her off her feet of course as Milo pleads. Pamela assures him that she'll find time to call him as the helicopter whisks away while Milo screams badly. Oscar wonders what now as Chief brings in the Glue Goo tube and orders Milo to fix the tanks he shattered earlier. Milo proclaims that this is all worth it just to see the girl of his dreams and Bea calls it so sweet as we zoom out as that tank is shattered too as Oscar proclaims that he needs more glue as we hear glass break and that ends the short at 10:20. Another very good Milo Moment; but the big payoff didn't quite catch. And the Gadget Trick of Doom and random words got annoying after a while. *** 3/4 (75%).

Riding In Cars With Fish: We begin this one with the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM (Sign: Hot Dogs) as Bud is rowing a boat making this the most pointless beginning ever. We head to the tank containing the F.D.M.V. building and we get a car crash sound as we pan south to the lineup of doom; then pan east to the GOOFS WITH ATTITUDE. Oscar's selling of panic is downright silly to say the least. It looks like he got a touch of bell's palsy since the last time we saw him. Bea is giddy because she's proud of Oscar finally trying to get his driver's license. It's a Bea like thing to do which probably means Oscar was smart not to do it at all beforehand. Milo gives Oscar a facial as Oscar proclaims that when he thinks of driving; he's awfully sweaty and looks for a place to hide. Is he talking about me again? Not today though; because he makes his driving dreams come true. So we head to the dream sequence of doom as Oscar is driving a roofless white country car with Bea wearing heart shaped goggles and a blue scarf. Oscar also winks to the camera as we return to reality (no, not really) as Oscar thinks of a better reason which is not bumming anymore car rides. So we logically see a flashback of doom as Oscar has hitched a ride with Bo Gregory on his truck. Oh; and there is a CGI rooster in the back as Bo tells Oscar that he only pecks fish he is fond of and logically Oscar gets pecked in the eyes. HAHA! Yeah; I'm a sadist; so shoot me. Then we get another flashback with Oscar sitting in a car in between Dan and Anne Choive. Oh goody; I thought the writers forgot about these losers. They talk about matching birthmarks and Dan tries to sound all creepy; but it doesn't work even with the spooky sound effects.

So we return to reality (no, not really) as Oscar shudders and recoils. Oscar brings out the driving test book out of his hair and states that he has been studying for months and has every traffic law down pat. However; he starts panicking because he might forget due to nervousness. Here's some advice: If you say it; it will come true. See Family Guy. He hates parallel parking too; and gets carsick as he hides behind Milo. Bea and Milo blow him off as bad which is probably not the best way to give motivation to someone. Bea wants Oscar to stay calm and Milo pets his hair causing it to part right in the middle. Oh and Bea claims that Milo has passed his driver's test allowing Milo to amuse me with his face and snapping fingers. That has to be a real slap in the face for Oscar. Oscar recovers and proclaims that he'll be calm and confident. He also wants his driving instructor as a blue student car races and spins around and parks perfectly into place in front of Oscar. You know; if someone does that, I would asking for someone to be fired for bad hiring practices. The window opens as the shadow effect is in place and then two eyes emerge and it's......Mr. Mussels? Oscar's reaction is priceless as Mussels lands on top of the car because he's the driving instructor and that the world is full of surprises. He also has another one as he bangs on the car and the back window slowly comes down to reveal.....Coach Richard Salmons. Oh my god! My head is about to explode. Zeus and Richard Simmons in the same short as FOCUS characters?! I don't think the world can handle two completely opposite characters without causing a massive black hole to suck in the entire universe.

By the way Coach Salmons is Oscar's backseat driving instructor. Okay; I can take that one seriously. Salmons is going to guide Oscar into adulthood which is a wee bit creepy to me as Mussels amuses me by showing Fanboy how to properly bang something manly. Oscar's face is still priceless as Salmons offers gentleness; while Mussels demands that Oscar get in the damn car. Yeah; the next eight minutes or so is going to be in the car with Mussels and Salmons terrorizing Oscar. Scene changer as we see Oscar in the driver's seat; Mussels being the front seat driver while Salmons being the backseat drivers as always. See; they are on a ding system; drive bad, and they'll ding him. Or more accurately, Coach Salmons will do it since he has the voice for it. This is the true definition of annoying; and I betcha it's all intentional by the writers too. If he gets two dings or less; he passes; three or more and he fails the test. Salmons reactions are hilarious and all for the wrong reasons I might add. Mussels tells him to do his best as Oscar gets it and sweats. Then they basically taunt him to drive as Oscar looks like he's in a panic state as he starts the car. He then drives out and we begin the test as we get the cameo roll call. Hugh Edminstion! The Emo Kids from The Dark Side of Fish! The Lobster Nephews! Albert Glass & Jumbo Shrimp! Bo Gregory again! Mr. Baldwin with groceries at the bus stop from 1986! Then it's the Car Rotary of Doom~! Oscar is told to follow his heart and his heart leads to....

The scene changer of doom as they stop right in front of a desert road. Mussels and Salmon approve of his driving so much that they want him to return to the FDMV to get his driver's license for real. Oscar proclaims that once he's returns he'll never have to drive again. However; Oscar has no idea where the FDMV is. Oscar gets the OUT OF NOWHERE map and they finally ding him. See; reading a map while driving is a ding-able offense. Except he wasn't driving to begin with when he was checking it. How do I know? Mussels blames the map and tears it to shreds. Yeah; it's the old "Men don't read maps" gig; invented by Al Khan himself. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! It's hard to laugh at that joke considering that Richard Simmons is in the backseat during this whole time. Anyhow; Mussels offers his keen sense of direction and so we drive away again as we do the Scooby Doo spot where they reverse field off-screen. DING! Doing that in real life is a ding-able offense! Sadly; the two opposite masters of annoyance are too dense to even notice. Then we repeat it again and then Coach Salmon sings which is an improvement from the usual singing in this series. And Mussels sucks at singing I should note. Oh; and Salmons farts of course. Salmons and Mussels get into an argument over asking for directions and Mussels wins that one easily.

So the water tank level lowers and Oscar tries to tell the two opposites that they might be out of the fish tanks. Which on the far side shot; they indeed are and they are literally leaking water. We see monkeys playing table tennis in the background as Mr. Mussels apologizes for letting his temper get the best of him while shouting as loud as humanly possible. Salmons forgives him of course because he doesn't have the balls to punch anyone anyway. And I do mean; the balls. POW! OUCH! Ummmm.... Oscar gets all panicky and looks at Mussels which gives him his second ding as Oscar turns around. Mussels yells at him that one more ding will break his heart. What heart Mr. Mussels? You are Zeus "Tiny" Lister for goodness sakes. Well; his voice anyways. Mussels of course lied about the shortcut anyway as Oscar ponders how he is going to get back and then notices a poster of Milo being Wanted for not throwing an awesome party. Wait; wasn't Milo cleared on those charges already? I'm all for foreshadowing; but it would have been better if they played this short BEFORE Pamela Hamster Returns.

Anyhow; that logically leads to Milo and Bea's living room as the telephone rings. Oh dear; Oscar is going to commit the ultimate ding-able offense: Talking while driving on his cellphone. That means logically; Oscar has failed the test. Or so I would think as Milo crawls onto Bea and answers the phone as I discover that it's Coach Salmons talking on the cellphone. Okay; that's perfectly fine....I think. They exchanges pleasure thoughts as Milo had four apples today. Bea only had one as Oscar wants directions instead. Salmons tries to ask him for directions; but the cell phone goes dead. I know this because the screen on the cellphone shows a dead fish bone superimposed on the battery. Salmon proclaims that his phone has died as Mussels seems more interested in the amount of apples Milo ate. Oscar sulks right on cue. Oscar thinks this is all over; but then Salmons and Mussels notice the conveniently placed Burger Bunny fast food joint and chant in a cult like fashion. Oscar sulks and drives right in front of it and stops before he can ram the car into the joint.

So another scene changer as we see the goofy opposites with goofy crowns eating. Oscar asks if there is anything else they need to do and Salmons assures him that he's done...and then slurps on his drink container hard. Including a closeup shot of his lips. Oooookkkkaaayyyyy. Oscar reverses field and the logic breaks as the water seems to disappear completely as the car is driven back onto the checkered floor of the pet store. So Coach Salmons finally admits that he needs the bathroom and wants Oscar to pull over. Oscar obeys him and stops. Apparently; this was all a ruse as Oscar forget to use his turn signal and we go all slow motion as Oscar gets dinged the third time. Oh crap; I knew this was going to happen. Well; it took nearly nine minutes before Oscar failed and considering those two losers; that's longer than I would have lasted. And then all the CGI animals cry in glorious slow motion. This pathos is just too stupid to be taken seriously after the comedy act throughout the short. Mussels talks about getting sucker punched in his heart as Oscar sulks thinking that it cannot get any worse. And then here comes Wilfield the CAT OF KILLING DEATH smashing the car front. Okay; now the third ding is justified. That still makes the first ding stupid; but two out of three isn't bad for the dinging eh? Mussels tries to fight off the monster; but it's too powerful. Despite the fact that Mussels seems to be still hanging on. Salmons of course hugs his knees and cries for mother as we find out that she's dead and in fish heaven. Oscar sweats and panics of course....

So then we get the GHOST HEADS OF MILO AND BEA echoing to Oscar to stay calm and confident. Oscar proclaims that he knows what must be done and he reverses the car and drives it away as we get the SCOOBY DOO CHASE SEQUENCE THE KILLER CAT EDITION PART DEUX~! This goes on for a while as Oscar decides it's time to show that crazy cat how to parallel park as the goofy opposite are SHOCKED AND APPALLED. So Oscar does a parallel park sequence perfectly in between some sacks of Smiley Kat food and the killer cat bangs into the wall with a wussy bump. Everyone is SHOCKED; not because Oscar has saved their hides, but that the biggest object in the entire short took one of the weakest bumps in this series. Salmons is HAPPY and Mussels points to his left as we realize that Oscar has paralleled parked about 10 feet away from the FDMV. How convenient eh?

So we return to the FDMV as Oscar parks the car and Mussels and Salmons are so happy. Oscar isn't so happy since he still failed the driver's test. However; Mussels and Coach Salmons thought it over and decide that because Oscar saved their lives; they are removing one of the dings from his record. Well; the first one was completely unfair and was only made for the sake of a joke that didn't catch, so I think that is a fair trade. Oscar is happy and float over to the goofy opposite as Salmons and Mussels invoke the ZENON FLASH OF DOOM and of course all the animals are happy with a jackhammer rainbow background. Whatever writers; we all know you did this to pad the running time. So we head back to Milo's living room as Bea is knitting. Wait a second. Bea is KNITTING. OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! Someone call Capital Hill. I need big sister government to protect me from the sexist stereotypes of a girl KNITTING! Milo answers the phone proclaiming that tomorrow; he is going to eat five whole apples. Not sure who he is calling though as Oscar floats in proclaiming that he has passed the driver's test. We find out that it's Phillis calling as Milo and Bea are happy as Oscar shows his license and he has a funny way of saying calm as the picture demonstrates. That is so creepy and it tastes good with tartar sauce too. Circle fade out and we end the short at 10:22. Dumb; but cute and somewhat funny. ** 3/4 (55%).


THE REVIEW LINE

Boy; Milo is really getting into his groove after getting buried in Dollars & Fish eh? It's no surprise that in Pamela Hamster Returns this subplot involving Milo and Pamela had to get a full short because Milo in a hamster suit was pure gold and it ultimately led to another really good Milo Moment. Sadly; it could have been the perfect Milo Moment if Pamela hadn't ruined it with her overuse of the word random (and using it in the improper context I might add) and then ruining the finish by making her big secret look so minor. If she had unzipped and revealed herself as a fish; it would have been massive. Sadly; it probably would have also ended her as a character (although she could always zip back in before Nibbles sees her and she has a secret identity.) and we know she'll be back in season two at some point. Very little Bea and Oscar also made this good and Milo's vandalism was absurd although he needs to realize how silly the Gadget Trick is and not do it since it causes logic breaks. Overall; I liked this short; but it should have been a ***** short and it didn't pan out due to mistakes that shouldn't have been made.

Riding In Cars With Fish was a rather easy short to rant on because it's mostly Not Without My Cereal; only with teens and driver's licenses. So if you are expecting a deep experience then look elsewhere as this is ten minutes of driving and silliness from Salmons and Mussels. Some of their mannerisms were pretty funny; but it felt like torture to watch Oscar try to handle their antics without his head exploding. After all; you got two completely opposite characters acting like an odd couple. So overall; I had no beef with this although I don't see the point of the crying and happy animals sequence other than to pad the running time on an already shallow short. So; next up is Milo's Big Idea and Mascotophe for Canada Day weekend. So....

Thumbs in the middle for both shorts and I'll see you all next time.



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