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Fish Hooks
Adventures in Fish Sitting/Banned Band Rant
Reviewed: 12/20/2011
Can Milo Rap Like Gunther?!
Welcome kiddies to Season 2 of Fish Hooks and I will try my darnest to rant on as many episodes I can. Fish Hooks does amuse me in some way; but it contains examples of hyperbolic real life disguised as a cartoon. Our first two new episodes personify that. One of them involve babysitting (as seen in TaleSpin in the past) and bands which we see a million times before from Disney and other cartoons. How do these episodes do?! So; let's rant on shall we...?
Adventures in Fish Sitting is written, story scripted and storyboards done by Diana Lafyatis. The direction is done by William Reiss and C.H. Greenblatt. Banned Band is written and storyboards done by Derek Evanick. The story is done by Nick Confalone, Neal Dusedau, Megan McCarthy, and Tim McKeon. The episode is directed by William Reiss and C.H. Greenblatt. Just to note: I will no longer be showing directors for this series unless it is someone else directing other than C.H. & William. All episodes are done in Flash; with CGI animals in the background. Heh.
Adventures in Fish Sitting: We begin this one with the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM (Sign: Single Ladies ) as Bud is pogosticking in the pet shop. Whatever turns you on Bud. So we head to the ROMAN ARENA OF DEATH to Miss Lips' room as Miss Lips exchanges notes with Bea. Apparently; her advice is to think about anything going wrong all the time because someday Miss Lips' will poke Bea right in the eye. Which is exactly what she does here. At least Bea sold it this time. Miss Lips calls it life and then sulks as Bea stammers and then asks why Miss Lips asked her to come in anyway. Miss Lips recoils and asks about Bea doing a babysitting job tonight; because Bea no sells because it's Friday see, and she goes out for action. Wait; I thought Bea had a five o'clock cerfew?! I didn't think her mother had progressed since Bea Becomes An Adult Fish. Miss Lips needs someone to run the job because she hasn't been out on the town in decades. I find that hard to believe since she looks barely 25 years old. Sad face ensues and Bea stammers again and tries to say that she'll think about it; but Miss Lips almighty takes it as a yes and claps her tentacles in the air. Lips claims that she'll love her little angel and smacks the top of her head. It's still nice to see that female on female violence is still allowed in DTVA. Miss Lips smacks into the door before going out and then gets her hair stuck in the top before leaving. Bea sulks in defeat what a shock?!
So we get the recycled footage of the parrot ringing the red alarm bell with his beak (as we have seen a few times before in this series) and head outside the ROMAN ARENA OF DEATH (with the fish leaving to go home) and then back into the hallway as Bea is floating around with her backpack and we see Milo and Oscar meeting and greeting Bea. Well; mostly Milo as Bea has the upset face on full blast. Oscar asks if she's okay and Bea does a Z-grade job selling the face that nothing is okay. She explains Miss Lips' job and Milo is surprised to find out that Miss Lips has a baby. Oscar claims that babysitting is no fun at all; unless you are Molly Cunningham, then it's a blast right Kit? Right? Oooookkkkaaaayyyy. Milo wants to join in and keep her company and Bea likes that idea and this job won't be so bad. So we get the flipping scene changer and head to Miss Lips' house AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) and her house has a lot of sailing wheels and white LED Christmas lights on the roof. The goofs with attitude head to the door and Bea rings the worst sounding doorbell in Fish Hooks; but Miss Lips still sells it anyway as she crashes and bashes off-screen before opening the door and her attempt to look scary doesn't scare me at all. It needs to be like Kirby's Epic Yarn in order to make it work better. The flash plus explosion jackhammer background makes it look silly as Oscar and Milo are shocked while Bea no sells (good enough for me I guess) the blue eyelashes she has on. Miss Lips is pleased to see some helpers as she adjusts her bow and Bea makes small talk. We discover that she's leaving for a pottery class and the goofs frown about thirty seconds before Miss Lips takes the MAN-SIZED bump into the door. Lips blames her mother for her height and squeezes her hair on the top of the door before heading back inside.
More crashing ensues and we scene change to inside as Bea asks where the tyke is and Miss Lips admits that it gets scared when the doorbell rings and hides under the bed, so Miss Lips leaves to her room to find it. Bea notices Oscar rubs his left eye for no reason that I can discern as Bea is confused as to why babies hate doorbells. Considering the sound of the doorbell; can you blame it Bea? Didn't think so. So Miss Lips returns and the goofs are in shock as Miss Lips brings out a fat blue catfish like creature with a pink bowtie. Lips calls her Attilia as Milo points out the obvious to us while Lips sets Attilia down on her feet on the floor. Lips rubs the cheeks of Attilia for a while and Milo mimicks for fun. Miss Lips thanks Bea as Bea doesn't seem too thrilled about this. Miss Lips tells her to call if there are any problems and we get another off-screen MAN-SIZED bump in the door from her. Attilia meows in sympathy pain for her. Attilia floats away in the same direction as Bea doesn't like the fact that she is watching a catfish on Friday nights. This would have been cutier if Bea's mother ended the crefew and this was Bea's FIRST Friday night out. Otherwise; there is no sympathy for Bea on this one. Oscar scratches like crazy because he's allergic to catfish. I see the Ron Stoppable disease has infected Oscar's brain. Then we hear Bea's cellphone and she answers it as we discover that Shellsea is outside of the burger joint known as the Burger Bunny. I see Razor Von Doom has made the trip too as Bea tells her that she cannot make it and to inform her of what is going on. Shellsea hangs up saying that she might do that.
Bea puts the phone away and calls this lame as Milo blows her off because Attilia is amazing. For a catfish; yeah. Otherwise; not really since she hasn't done anything but meow. Oscar claims that Attilia is upset; so Milo agrees to tend to her and cheer her up. So Milo jumps on Attilia's back and embraces it. Awwwwww. I love it when Milo does that; it makes him so...so....what is the word again? I'll come back to it when I get it back in my head. Milo bounces his ass in the air...gay in the light hearted context of the word. There it came back to me as Attilia is not happy at all and becomes a monster and pissed. Clearly this catfish has been on the gas as Bea and Oscar are horrified as Milo gets his ass kicked off-screen. Milo returns as the cat has ripped the eyeballs out of his sockets and clawed on his hair as Milo claims that he's good when he is not being hugged. HA! Milo goes away to lie down and heal thyself as Bea's cellphone rings and it's Shellsea again informing her that Bo Gregory is playing the stereo in his car out loud. Hands up if you care about this...I didn't think so. Bea likes this though as we see Attilia scratching the green couch and the knitted mat on the seat of the couch. Bea panics like mad and hangs up on Shellsea as she pleads for Attilia to stop; but she no sells and almost claws Bea's eyeballs. Oscar restrains her as Milo comes in with a sandwich on a plate (Ah! Fish in this reality do heal fast) and blows off Bea for picking on it. Oscar asks about the sandwhich and Milo answers the obvious for us. Bea has a Krackpotkin plan on her mind and....
...we have the flipping scene changer as Bea puts a bowl of Catfish kibbles on the floor. Attilia drops to the floor and dumps the bowl of kibbles and then steals Milo's sandwich like Santino Marella stole Jerry Lawler's sub from Subway on an episode of WWE Raw years ago. Milo screams and Attilia sucks it up like a vacuum cleaner. Yeap; this episode really sucks more than Shuan Desmond now. Milo rephrases what he meant by calling Attilia awesome. Which translates to he hates her. Bea gets her cellphone and decides to call Miss Lips; but the phone doesn't become answered because Miss Lips is at her pottery class and sucking at it like the dumb adult that she is. Considering who voices her; is that really any surprise? And she cannot even handle a cellphone answering machine either as we get more shattering glass. Bea hangs up and then the cellphone rings and Bea answers it. Sadly; it's Shellsea again as she notices two girls wearing the same outfit (despite one looking like the daughter of Mr. Baldwin and the other looking like the sister of Shellsea.) and they are ready to rumble. Ironically; the seahorse girl has the exact same voice as Shellsea as we see Bea biting her fins and hangs up telling her she will see what she can do as Attilia now has a crush on Oscar and his face. HAHA! Our first funny spot over six and a half minutes in. Fur flies, Attilia bails and Oscar sneezes. Bea wants to get out of the house and Oscar likes that idea. Milo asks what to do with Attilia as she claws the curtains on the window for her amusement. Although with that face; that might be just in theory at this point.
Bea, Oscar and Milo leave the house as Bea proclaims that they will be back before ten o'clock which is when Miss Lips comes back. Oh sure; let's abandon the useless working catfish while we are at it. So we teleport almost literally to the Burger Bunny (funny how they would scene change going into the house; but teleport directly to this scene without one) and we do the "do nothing of note and see if the kids laugh at it" spot. It doesn't work; and no amount of grinning is going to change it guys. So can it and thankfully; Bea does almost ten seconds into the spot. And then we do it again and then teleport back to the goofs returning to the house and it might as well be recycled footage at this point. Oh wait; the door has the Attilia hole on the wall since apparently this show doesn't have it's daily allowance of Scooby Doo snow angel spot yet. Milo notices the hole in the door and Bea panics like mad as she goes inside and does the Wuzzles throw away spot on the CHEST OF DEMONS. Yeah; she is tres stupide considering that if Attilia went through the door; that means she's already gone. Bea panics some more claiming that Miss Lips will be destroyed if she find out. Really Bea?! You are going to project what's going to happen to you into her? What a trampy little wench this Bea gal is?! Oscar tells her not to panic and then panics because here comes the grey car of Miss Lips who decides to play "guess when I'm going to park the car in the driveway" on Oscar. HAHA!
Everyone panics as Miss Lips makes it to the door; but Milo has a Krackpotkin plan and if you cannot guess what Milo does here; you have no business reading this rant. Miss Lips has problems opening the door and then knocks on the door. Then she realizes that this is HER house and invokes the chainsaw and cuts the top of the door allowing her to open the door and enter without taking another MAN-SIZED bump. Yeah; she had a freakin chainsaw. Must have been in the car all this time too. So Miss Lips enters and Milo is wearing car ears and we get Z-grade music and closeups much to my disdain as Miss Lips wants answers. Oscar claims that Milo is Attilia. Memo to Oscar: Attilia was wearing a red ribbon on his hair and was all blue and doesn't wear black cat ears. I'm betting that Miss Lips is going to fall for it too. And she does as Oscar and Bea bail out the door and leave Milo Cat at the mercy of Miss Lips. Miss Lips and Milo exchange pleasure thoughts and Milo blows his cover about five seconds in; but Lips is still fooled. Wait; I don't get this BS&P posturing: If females are supposed to look smart; why are adult females looking so damn dumb? Milo wants some lasgana. If you are going to do a Garfield reference; Garfield is not suppose to talk even if we hear his voice.
So we go to the scene changer to the park as Oscar and Bea look around and Oscar has another sandwhich for Attilia to inhale. Bea calls this hopeless; but the wind blows (in water?) and Oscar sneezes again. Bea gets inspired and pushes Oscar away and tells him to follow his nose (The Fruit Loops gag) as we scene change into town and Oscar gets pushed while sneezing. We push to the football field as Oscar's eyes are burning, burning, BURNING. Screw you! You soft-core porn invader! Oh wait; Oscar has better acting than Bea. Sorry; we'll just call you dick. Anyhow; Bea notices Attilia has done a Scooby-Doo Snow Angel spot and we panic again. We head into the hallway as Oscar and Bea notice Attilia's shadow moving in the hallway in the foreground. Bea and Oscar follow and notice the shadow going into Miss Lip's office. Bea deduces that Attilia is looking for Miss Lips and so Bea foolishly walks in and we get the off-screen fight and Bea is a Milo like mess. Bea has almost no hair; which was stripped from her head. Oscar and Bea now declare that Attilia hates everyone. However; Bea realizes that she likes only one person and so the door to the office opens and it's Bea dressed up like a really poor woman's Miss Lips. Attilia is puffed up on the desk as Bea is wearing a construction cone and has paddles for arms. I'm going to place 2:1 odds that Attilia will fall for it considering the personality of Miss Lips. Attilia then hears sneezing and no sells. Geez; Bea why did you think stuffing Oscar in your dress was such a good idea. Bea stammers and goldbricks like an idiot as usual.
Oscar gets paddled of course and Attilia sells and purrs on Bea's Oscar belly which should signal the cover being blown by Oscar sneezing. It doesn't happen of course as Bea bails out of the office and we return to Miss Lips at the door as she opens it and is confused to seeing her outside the house. Bea and Oscar scratch their heads and then Bea confesses that she has something for her as Miss Lips notices the real Attilia and they embrace. Awwwwww. Milo does the Garfield sleeping in the bed trick of course as Miss Lips would like to know why and Bea sighs and admits that she didn't do a super good job and Lips gets mad and we got some closeups and sweating. And bad music. Please; for the love of life; stop with the horror show! Thankfully; Miss Lips burps and admits that the burreto almost killed her (death reference #1 of the episode) and Bea asks if she's cool. Miss Lips thanks her for being honest (Riiiigggghhhtttt) and even gives her the messed up vase she made in pottery class as a gift. Lips claims that Bea is like Miss Lips in some way and puckers up like crazy as Bea giggles in response. So we scene change to Bea and Oscar leaving with the pottery vase as Miss Lips waves farewell. It's also nice to see that they maintained continuity on the door top too. Bea is relieved that this is over and Oscar proclaims that there is a bright side in that there will be less to talk about on Monday. So we cut back to Milo acting like Garfield again and yes he hates Monday. We all hate Mondays. Circle fade out to end the episode at 10:20 approx. Not too bad at all; but can we please have some other adult other than Mr. Baldwin have a brain? I thought that the new Disney hated sexism?! *** (60%).
Banned Band: We begin with the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM (Sign: Spit Valves) as Bud is playing the tuba and the killer cat of doom is stuck inside. OUCH! So we head to the ROMAN ARENA OF DEATH and into the hallway with Milo with his golden kazoo pancing around the hallway and playing it for his posse. The usual friends of course as Fimberly gets his nose poked. Milo joins Bea and Oscar and does some more playing of the kazoo before embracing Oscar and Bea. Oscar praises Milo's work and Milo claims that he wants to join the school marching band. And speaking of the marching band; here they come, decked in instruments and red coats and hats. And of course the over wrought entrance. Milo visions himself as a Milo cloning marching band which is not exactly an image I want to see and it's band tryouts today. Milo is giddy and wants to join so we have the scene changer as we see a purple haired purple fish with glasses and the marching band outfit addressing the crowd since he's looking for viable victims...errr..I mean personnel to join this year. He is flanked by a red fish who has puffed cheeks and a peach fish with braces and glasses. The purple one is named Lonnie in case you didn't notice the name plate on the desk. Lonnie looks like Oscar and Milo in a Wuzzles experiment. The peach fish looks like Bea and Oscar in a Wuzzles experiment. The red fish breaks continuity by being none of those things.
Lonnie is voiced by Doug Borchu who is a full on Disney live action television child actor. Almost all of his credits (nine of them plus five self credits) are from Disney: Zoey 101 as Blatzberg, iCarly as Duke, Disney 365, Pair of Kings as Oogie, Sonny With a Chance as Grady Mitchell, and So Random as Grady Mitchell again. The Replacements as Terrance is his DTVA debut and has appeared in Kick Buttowski as Abbie. That's all. Lonnie squeezes Beacar's nose (yes; that is my running joke for the peach fish) and gets the auditions under way. First victim goes to Fimberly banging a tramborine. And she whacks herself in the face with it. I would guess she has been rejected and Lonnie does despite calling it cute. I'm guessing that he start and puts out fires at the same time too; considering that he still liked seeing violence on a female. Next victim is Jumbo Shrimp with claironet's up the nose and playing them all right. This is another example why I think SOPA will backfire in their faces too: I would love to see Nickeldeon sue Disney for infringing on Fanboy & Chum Chum; not because it's sensible or funny or right, but to amuse me. If I cannot watch my favorite shows on-line; at least amuse me with a case in court. After all; amusement is what counts the most in entertainment. Lonnie rejects that one too. Next victim is Shellsea doing the female stereotype Samba. I'm sorry; but Lonnie doesn't accept Richard Simmon Salmon duets. Lonnie likes crumpets with lemon on them. We then see a yellow fish with glasses and a red dress playing the recorder. And she gets rejected. WHAT THE HELL?! I thought you liked that kind of music. Next up is Oscar's long lost big brother (with blue shirt) playing the wooden flute, but Lonnie rejects him. Lonnie also rejects a fish playing the saxophone. Lisa is now pissed off even though there is nothing she can do about it (Lisa: Wait until SOPA/Protect IP is passed Mr. Weagle; then you'll change your mind about it.).
Lonnie acts like a broken record and then get slapped in the face OUT OF NOWHERE and thanks him for doing it. Speaking of theft; Lonnie stole from Stealbeak in Water Way To Go on that gag. Milo, Bea and Oscar do not like this at all as Oscar calls Lonnie a tough judge. So the yellow fish with the hoodie and electric guitar points out that Lonnie is a snob who has a big head because he took third place in the marching band at the county fair this year. Which is sort of like being assistant to the hall monitor and means just as much. Milo of course is too legit dumb to quit and brings in the violin case containing his harp....oh wait; he pulled out his kazoo. I don't recall Milo needing to lose weight. I'm not even going to bother calling this one since we all know Lonnie is a snobby piss ant and he's NEVER going to accept Milo. Milo doesn't help his cause by playing the kazoo like Fanboy trying to play the flute with his nose in Pick A Nose. On the other hand; Milo still playing it properly; so that is an improvement. Did Milo turn into Curt Henning when the cameras rolled? For those who don't know; buy the Mr. Perfect DVD set and watch the documentary on Curt and you'll see the point. He also sprays water into them too; but Lonnie takes the high road and states calmly that he's rejected. Well; I cannot say I blame him. Milo's germs can be problematic since it turns people into thinking that being a baby is cool and witty.
Milo pleads but no dice as Lonnie ends the tryout and proclaims that no one made the team; but they are welcome to try again next year and cuts a promo about piccolos in the parade and waves farewell. Everyone groans and leaves except for the goofs with attitude and Bea blows Lonnie off for being a jerk. Come on guys! Milo's playing was horrible and Lonnie was the diplomatic one. If Bea is so upset about this; why didn't she try out?! If Milo had said it; it would have been cute (projection still) but also make sense. This doesn't. Milo whines like a baby as usual because he practices so hard (being like Chum Chum and failing as usual). Oscar points out that he doesn't have to be in a marching to play music and Bea has gets inspired. Bea gathers her friends and proclaims that it's time to start a new band. Bea is an actress (in bed of course; but whatever) as Milo shows a white shirt with a green apple and it's called The Green Apple Experience. I should point out that it's copyrighted by Marvel Tours. I would love to see Marvel Tours play patent troll and sue Disney for infrignement. See what I mean by SOPA backfiring?! Sure; the little guy will get hurt; but it's nothing compared to the hurt multi-national corporations will suffer. Ask Google about it. They already lost a suit to Apple on infringement already today. Bea rejects it and wants to call it Bea Enter Boys which is thankfully not copyrighted. Oscar agrees with that one and Milo flips in water for joy and squashes his friends. Heh.
So we head to the band room and inside as Bea is playing on the electric piano, Oscar is on an old fashion guitar and Milo has the kazoo of course. Oscar goes all B on us as Bea is writing notes on her paper; probably wondering about her next great idea in acting which doesn't involve soft porn. Anyhow; Bea is done writing her new song and Oscar has his guitar tuned up somewhat and Milo is sitting ready to go. Bea starts up and Lonnie interrupts the proceedings much to everyone's surprise. Lonnie claims that Milo cannot play music for another year. Wait; Milo couldn't play in the band this year, so what is the point of going after Bea Enter Boys now (which sounds like a lame porno title). Bea protests this of course and Milo shakes his ass for the second time in as many shorts. Lonnie actually agrees with them; except he turns out the lights, flashes a flashlight and declares himself a villain. WHAT?! If the title is supposed to be Band Banned; then Lonnie should tell them that only the band is authorized to play in Freshwater High according to the rules of the school. Sure; it still makes Lonnie a villain; but it makes the villain believe that he is right and Milo is a victim of the rules being an ass. This is not going to make the rest of this short look good; let me tell you. So the two bodyguards (one of them is basically a yellow male fish) come in and unplug Bea's electric piano and Milo gasps in horror (complete with jackhammer background) as Lonnie plays like a guy who wants to break Bea's kneecaps. I know BS&P is a bitch; but why not unplug it and then CUT the wires so she cannot plug it back in. I cannot take this seriously even if I tried. So Lonnie goes over to the guitar Oscar has and we play it again and I betcha he smashes the guitar over Oscar's head. It doesn't happen as the red fish takes the guitar and plays it. That's retuning? Oscar panics and this episode is going down the crapper.
Milo gasps in horror (with blue jackhammer background) as even Corey Baxter is conceding that this is stupid judging by the acting. Lonnie doesn't give a damn anyway as he has yellow fish bodyguard reshuffle the sheet music. What is the point of this? If I was them; I would laugh in Lonnie's face and smash the music stand on his head and make him cry to his mommy. I betcha one shot is all it would take too. Lonnie calls it a small sample of his destruction if Milo dares enter the music business and he will be played like a second hand fish drum..which ends up being the setup for the joke of Lonnie playing drums on a fishhead who sells badly. Whatever Lonnie; you have the threatening skills like a glorified censorship board. BUM-BUM-CHING! Lonnie leaves as we head into the hallway as Oscar tunes his guitar and Bea blows off Lonnie and this one is slightly more justified than the previous one. Considering that Lonnie's threatening is so BS&P'ed; why should I take him seriously? Just go back to the room and play and if he tries to threaten you again; bonk him on the head. What is the worst he can do? Shuffle the script? Milo whines again and proclaims that they need to do something; but Bo Gregory steps in and states that they are serious as a dust storm as they put a cork and a padlock on his jug. Now I doubt that it was for playing music. I think Lonnie was doing a public service since the jug looks like a Moonshine bottle. YEE HAW! POW! OUCH! Ummmmmm... Dan and Ann Chovie float in proclaiming that Lonnie destroyed their recording session on their duet album The Chovies: Together Forever. Considering that the subtitle is already copyrighted, again another public service.
Everyone comes in telling everyone that Lonnie prevented them from practicing after school and even muzzled Clamantha and her band. So not only is Lonnie a goth hater; he's also creating a monopoly. Where have I heard this before? Oh yeah; the RIAA. And it's DISNEY (A MPAA member and SOPA supporter no less) writing about it. How convenient eh? Milo has enough and proclaims that music should be shared (I think Chris Dodd just had a stroke hearing that one) and wants to get everyone involved to counter them and we get nothing but crickets from the peanut gallery. Milo doesn't care and starts playing again as I await for Lonnie to come and smash Milo's kazoo (I saw the preview for this episode; so we all know where this is going). We do see a roundtable of the elite marching band eating and Lonnie is pissed off of the noise. So we head to the Band Room as Bea has a pink paper and Oscar is tuning his guitar again. It took six hours; but it works now as Bea And Her Boys are back in business and it has a pink poster. I like Bea Enter Boys better as a name. Oscar is giddy complete with heart jackhammer background as Milo enters the room and panics like mad. Milo has lost his kazoo see; and Oscar asks to check his back; and Milo claims that it's not there and then she squeals and Milo races out of the school and as I predicted; the marching band MURDERS Milo's kazoo. Lonnie is sitting in the back of a silver limo with disdain. The band leaves as Milo grabs the pieces and calls Lonnie a monster. Lonnie warned him of course and the car drives away.
Milo cries claiming that he bought the kazoo and named him Kazooie. Okay; the SOPA joke is dead now so let's move on. Oscar wants to play Captain Wetblanket and forget about music; but Milo gets evil intentions and wants to give the band a dose of their own medicine. So we head to the stage with the marching band as Lonnie conducts as he wants to play Freshwater Spirit only more awesomely. However; the band cannot play since all the instruments are sticky as honey. Even Lonnie's stick is covered in honey as the tuba player blows more honey on the middle section of the band. Well; you cannot fault Milo for not coming up with original screw jobs; that is for sure. Lonnie demands answers as the second tuba player blows honey and notices Milo's picture in honey on the wall. Lonnie is pissed off as he leaves to the hallway and makes a beeline to Milo and Milo sarcastically admits that he did it. And now Lonnie has had enough and challenges Milo to a battle of the bands. If Milo wins; they play music for life; but if Lonnie wins then they cannot play music for life and the students gasp in horror. Milo gets in Lonnie's face and IT IS ON BABEE! So we head to the football field as the marching band marches in against the goofs with attitude and electric guitars. Lonnie brings out his stick and proclaims that Milo is going down like a cheesy singer on the Titantic which we see a model version of the ship going down the toilet. It's bad enough that they have to make fun of a tragic event; but Celine Dion is NOT a crappy singer. If Celine Dion is crappy; then what does that makes Miley Cyrus? Sh****?!
Milo blows it off because they fear nothing. When you have nothing to lose but your life, you often fear nothing. So we start the battle of the band as everyone floats in and it's basically bashing everyone and their instruments. Bea, Oscar and Milo makes this actually a half decent fight in spite of the numbers. Oscar loses his instrument; so Bea breaks her keyboard guitar in two and passes to Oscar to counter the heels. Milo spits with the kazoo as Lonnie yells for the circle march and they surround the babyfaces. Lonnie proclaims that they are screwed like a baby stuffed in a tuba which we see. Oy vey guys. Lonnie proclaims that the music belongs to him. How RIAA of you Lonnie...and here comes the ANGRY STUDENT MOB OF DEATH with music instruments. We charge and now the band is outnumbered by a lot. Shellsea's fighting style is hilarious by the way as the band bails like scalded fish. Lonnie is pissed off as Milo appears with his new kazoo (how convenient eh?) and we have the stick fight of doom and Lonnie tries to fight back; but the stick gets forced out of his hand and Milo proclaims that music is for everybody. Sadly; Lonnie is not a member of the RIAA and he gives up and the student cheer. The band sulks away as Lonnie blows them off because he's better than they are and thanks them for nothing. I cannot argue with that Lonnie; this episode was pointless. Bea takes offense to that theft as Milo wraps it up as he stuck to his guns and won. Milo wants to play for music lover's everywhere and everyone plays the out of nowhere kazoos to end the episode at 10:20 approx. Lonnie sucks; but Milo carried this episode well enough. It's hard to take the MPAA seriously when they constantly steal from others and each other. ** 1/2 (50%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Pretty much two middling shorts to start Season two. Adventures in Fish Sitting is all right; but it lacked the charm that made It Came From Beneath The Seaduck so awesome. One is that Attilia is a one note gimmick that no one really cared about and two, Bea didn't seem to like nor care about who she was babysitting. Three; Miss Lips continues the trend of making every new Disney adult dumber than a box of hammers and it continues to bug me since it makes all the adults the same. There's nothing wrong with stupid adults; I mean look at Homer Simpson. But when you make all adults stupid; it makes it depressing to watch after a while. Milo's Garfield routine carried this episode and some of Oscar's moment were pretty funny. This was a good episode; but if I want to see a babysitting episode that works perfectly; I'd watch TaleSpin which had a great subplot of Don Karnage trying to covert into Cape Suzette and Kit and Molly fighting a squid with more personality than Miss Lips and her catfish combined. I'm just biased, deal with it.
Band Banned actually was a pretty good episode on paper; but they really screwed up Lonnie and the marching band by making him look like a Mederith clone from the Bratz movie; only male. I feel that it could have been better if Lonnie wrote the rules on music with Milo fighting against an unjustified rule. It made watching Lonnie's attempts at lame humor and threat look silly and nonsense overall. The ending is basically the same one they do several times before with Milo's Big Idea and Good Morning Freshwater which is to use the student angry mob which at least was amusing this time and not just another paranoid moment. Overall; not a bad start to my ranting career. So next up is Merry Fishmas Milo and Milo On The Lam (which aired in the UK before the North American release) instead of Sixteen Clamandles. Then it's onto Kick Buttowski for four episodes and then we go to Ducktales. So......
Thumbs in the middle for both shorts and I'll see you all next time.