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Fish Hooks
Fish Prom Rant
Reviewed: 06/15/2013
Can You Smell The Reset Button Being Pushed Here?
Our next rant up for bids on the "New Disney Price Is Silly; But I've Seen Thousands Worse" is the Fish Hooks version of school prom night. That's all you need to know. And Angela returns in a speaking voice for the first time since Bea screwed ALL OF US...well; screwed Angela and Oscar's relationship too. So; let's rant on shall we...?
Fish Prom is written and storyboarded by Derek Evanick and Diana Lafyatis. The story is done by the writers, directors, Maxwell Atoms and Noah Z. Jones . All episodes are done with Toon Boom; thus correcting a serious mistake I made calling this series (and Kick Buttowski for that matter) done in Flash. My opinion is the exact same: Medium don't matter; talent does.
We begin this one with the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM (Sign: Formal Wear according to Fish Hooks Wikia) as Bud is dressed in a light blue suit which is larger than Oscar's with a stack of white flowers as he is adjusting his tie for no reason that I can think of. Sigh. So we head to the ROMAN ARENA OF DEATH as we see Fimberly bringing a table in and bumps on her face for no reason again. Stop with the tropes please! Then we get a jump cut of her returning with the poster which is Fish Prom tickets. I should note that this episode didn't air in the USA first; it aired in English on Disney Channel Asia. Yeah. So we get rumbling and all the kid babyfaces rush in and create the FCC FRIENDLY CLOUDDUST FIGHT OF DEATH and Fimberly may have broken her leg arm when the dust clears..under water. This question cannot be answered; do not think too much. So we see the screaming kids all in the background while we have Koi Fish grunting her contracted lines, Escarmargot sliming her contracted lines and Shellsea discoing her lines. I like that. DISCO~! POW! OUCH! Ummmm... Then we see the goofs with attitude in the middle of the hallway as Oscar is giddy, Milo is giddy and Bea is giddy...in bed. POW! OUCH! Ummm... And then we get the TEDDY RUXPIN SONG OF DOOM with Bea as the lead. MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP! Okay; don't make it stop. I'm only kidding with ye. Yes; Bea is singing and stealing Headphone Joe's broom why do you ask? Yes; she's dry humping the railing; why do you ask? Yes she ties up Deranged Kermit; why do you as...POW! OUCH! Ummmm... Bea dances on desk (She also sezs oh my god for real; but doesn't as usual) and Mr. Baldwin blows it off. Oscar's geeky posse joins in and Oscar sings, which is actually better than Bea's. Oscar opens the locker and, yes folks; they are STILL acting as if Angela and Oscar have reconciled or something. I know this because there are pictures of Angela on the inside part of the door. Sorry Noah; Bea killed the heat of that relationship; so this doesn't make any sense anymore.
Then we head to the girl's washroom with the female babyfaces and Shellsea singing who outclasses them both combined. HAHA! They need to pay this off with Shellsea getting Steve Jackson or even better; Angela. Okay; that last one won't happen; but I WANT THAT TO HAPPEN! Milo sings with Clamantha's cheer leading squad; and then everyone sings including Bo Gregory as they sing and float outside the ROMAN ARENA OF DEATH as the entire school population is singing the chorus. Decent song for a change! Then the bell rings and everyone goes inside on cue. Heh. So we cut to Oscar playing the guitar so badly that that might be enough to get the heat back in this relationship with Angela. Or not. The geeky boys plus Milo cheer for Oscar's wedding or his funerel. I am having a hard time figuring out which it is actually. Oscar throws the out of nowhere red rose behind his back which does make me giggle and proclaims that this might be cheesier than taking Milo to the prom; but it will be special. If Bea didn't kill your relationship; yeah this would mean something. But it's nothing now. Jumbo Shrimp asks who Milo is taking to the prom and Milo wants the ladies to ask him which Oscar gleefully points out the fatal flaw in that thinking. And yes folks; Albert/Escarmargot is now an angle. Too bad Albert and Escarmargot are fifth on the pecking order on each gender side. Which is equal to be Zipper at this point. Jumbo Shrimp's date is a Swedish model from the next fish town which none has seen. Yeah sure JS. You were the one who claimed that your magic ring gave you Clear status. I cannot take anything you say seriously. That excuse sucked! Anyhow; the guise is that Milo must hurry up and find a date; or else all of the good ladies will be taken. And yes folks; Jumbo Shrimp calls them hottie. Isn't that a wee bit sexist there new Disney? Milo touches his cheeks and panics.
So we get the CLOCK SCENE CHANGER OF DOOM (WHY NOAH? WHY?) and head to P.E. class as Bea's posse of doom is sitting in the stand wearing P.E. light blue shirts. Why? I have no idea. Bea is all giddy about some model magazine no one gives a crap about and Fimberely is annoying Shellsea for no real reason that I can think of. Shellsea asks who is Bea going out with as Bea as we discover that we are on the football field which is now a baseball diamond. Did I mention that Steve Jackson is the catcher? Did I mention Bea wants to go out with him? Did I mention that his Yoshi Yarn closeup is still as awesome as Shellsea's disco jackhammer background? Okay; I think we have all the bases covered. They squeal and Koi grunts. Bea understands her somehow as she has not asked Steve Jackson to the prom. So Coach Salmons calls for Bea to come up to bat in his usual Richard Simmons voice and Bea goes nuts and screams. In hyper-ventilating fashion I might add. Salmons no sells in his usual way and Bea panics more and wants to do this after lunch. Escarmargot points out that this may be a bad idea because we see a small female fish with a purple baseball helmet up to bat and she is addressed as Nicole. Bea panics and then rushes in and tackles Nicole stage left and then we do the FCC FRIENDLY OFFSCREEN BEATDOWN OF DEATH on Nicole. Yeah; you can commit violence on anyone as long as it takes place off screen. Like the punching sounds didn't give that fact away already. Bea returns with the bat and stammers like an idiot over the prom thing and Steve Jackson pretty much tells her that he's coming to the promo with her. Bea gets so giddy as Salmons throws a fastball and Bea misses it by ten inches; but the power of suggestion makes the baseball fly over the tank and onto the checkered floor of Bud's Pet as Coach calls all this a homerun and Bea cheers which we segue to Bea twirling around in the hallway and Milo grabs her and panics because he needs help. Bea tells him that he's taken and he panics again. Oscar points out that he asked the entire school of girls and they no sold his deal because they already have dates which Milo does his usual chanting of previous events.
And then...here comes the EVIL ONE himself. And the trio is so stupid that they confuse Headphone Joe and Randy "I Wish I Was Kenny Powers" Pincherson; despite the fact that neither use the same voice; or are even close to having the same voice. Oscar wants Randy to leave them alone and he sezs no and has a proposition for Milo. See; Randy has a hot date; a guniea pig that is way hotter than Bea; which Bea takes offense...in and out of bed. Gee; Bea has no gratitude that Randy, for once in his life, has decided to not stalk Bea for a date. However; Randy's date won't go out unless she gets a date with her sister; so Randy is offering Milo to be the sister's date. Oscar and Bea remind Milo that this is a bad idea. Can this be any worse than killing the Oscar/Angela relationship? I don't think so. Besides; we need another Milo Moment to carry this episode on it's back if the finish of this episode is what I think it is going to be. Randy kneels down and begs for forgiveness and mercy and Milo has to accept because even Randy cannot act this one out, can he? Randy wishes he was Kenny Powers and twinkletoes out as usual. Bea and Oscar act like they don't care about the fact that Milo fell for Randy Pincherson again. At least Bea has an excuse as she swims around blushing about Steve Jackson again. So Oscar is surprised by this and proclaims that he thought Bea would do better; and Milo laughs it off because it's Steve Jackson. Oscar then channels Eleroo by grabbing the guitar and red rose (from his afro hair of course) and proclaims that he is going out with Angela and it will be a special night. Which we segue to Angela's house as Oscar is offering her a red rose and guitar music. Reading from the summary and knowing what is to come in Season three; you can pretty much guess the outcome of this. To Angela's credit; she reveals that she hates dressing up and going to proms; therefore there is no hard feelings despite the fact that Bea screwed up the relationship in Oscar Is A Playa. To be fair; Oscar trying to get back in Angela's good graces is a normal male reaction in real life; so I won't complain much. I just don't like how this episode is going to end.
She offers Oscar to skip prom and play Possum Rage 4 which is basically Mega Man 4 with a possum welding a gun and a lot of skeleton complete with 1985 NES style box. And people accuse Seth McFarlane of being too much in the 1980's?! Angela kicks chair; makes Mega Man shooting sounds and wants those skeletons to die already (death reference #1) and BS&P clearly stepped in because he's doing chops instead of pointing her finger like a gun. You just knew the "zero tolerance" mentality was going to infect BS&P's brain sooner or later. Oscar doesn't know because he really wanted to go; and Angela holds hands with Oscar and proclaims that they'll find a way to make this not look horrible. So yes; Angela has accepted the date with Oscar. You can call them; Fish Hook's Odd Couple. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ZAP! ZAP! OUCH! OUCH! Ummmm.... So we head to the Hokey Poke as we pan over to the table with Milo and Bea splitting up the difference between 47 fish; it comes out to $15 fish dollars. So it costs $705 fish dollars? And what is so important as to split it up? Oscar joins in and we exchange notes as Milo asks about the guitar playing and Oscar states that Angela is stoked. So Bea just has to make Oscar sweat by holding hands. Yes folks; it's official: They are trying to bring the Bea/Oscar relationship back from the dead corpse of Mary Jane Watson. Milo is giddy because prom night will be here before you know it...And we segue to Milo in his room panicking as Jumbo Shrimp and Albert are playing tug of war on Milo's threads while being naked as fish jay birds. Oscar comes in and panics because he wants his flat iron. Then we cut to Bea's room as she has a towel on her hand and wearing a robe...on the bed. Her floor is a mess; she's talking to Shellsea on the cell phone and she has a picture of a female person carrying what appears to be a hatchet. That has to be a rib on something; but I cannot put my thumb on what it could be. Anyway; Koi Fish grunts in the foreground wearing a robe as Shellsea orders her to get off the phone because apparently Shellsea is in the background of the room somewhere...
... And Bea sings again! She ALWAYS seems to sing more songs with a higher level of competence in the 22 minute episode; then she does in the 11 minute ones. Lots of shaving eyebrows, brushing teeth; ironing Oscar's afro with an iron etc. Take one guess who is doing the ironing. HEE HEE! Sadly; the afro is cannot be tamed and is more unstable than Circus Afro~; if that is humanly possible. The amazing part is; for all the singing in this show, I still have to deal with it on Father's Day too. More boxes recycled from Fanboy & Chum Chum (the episode where the cup was acting like a dog; seriously); and Shellsea makes me chuckle by singing; but looking like she is no selling. She is the fish version of Sandy Sweetcheeks; only a lot meaner. I like it. DISCO~! POW! OUCH! Ummmm... Can I have a license for that promo Shellsea? (Shellsea: No. Then I cannot punch you in the face for stealing it anymore. Gregory: Figures.) So everyone dresses up as Milo is wearing a red tuxedo tonight because he's Milo and he's awesome. Lots of powder, more FBCC boxes (and more no selling from Shellsea) and rocking from the males. Yeah. This was a Perfectly Acceptable music sequence; and really, that's all I can ask for. It also ends the segment 10 and a half minutes in. This is for the most part okay; but it feels so uneasy in hindsight considering what is yet to come...
After the commercial break; we see the male babyfaces with in their tuxedos. Oscar is wearing green, Steve Jackson is wearing blue (with matching bowtie) and Milo has red and welding a white cane. I'm guessing that is to beat up Randy Pincherson if he gets out of line like the EVIL ONE usually does. And speaking of the EVIL ONE himself; he blows them all off as usual. Randy (complete with slick hair to match his evil smile) introduces Milo to his date which is a CGI ginuea pig with a purple ribbon on her head. Milo loves this; but Randy blows him off because the purple bowtie is his date. Milo's date is panned over and she is exactly the same pig only with a squeaking sound and a black ribbon. Oooookkkkkkaaayyyyy; so what is the problem with this picture? Milo isn't so giddy anymore as Randy demands to know when the limo is coming and here it comes out of nowhere (I. guessing that they are outside of Oscar's house, but I'm not sure about it). The side windows are open as the economy of characters syndrome strikes again because it's Coach Salmons and Zeus Mussels. That is actually good continuity from Riding In Cars With Fish too. Coach Salmons is still singing light hearted as usual. And yes; they are limo drivers as everyone gets in but the gerbil sisters are just TOO FAT. See what happens when you don't make your limo's CGI approved. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So Zeus Mussels shoulder blocks them both into the limo and we drive away. We head to Bea's house as the limo parks in front. I know this because Bea's parents are inside as the door opens and the babyfaces walk in. Albert greets Escarmargot who is wearing a green dress; but not a real dress because that's cruel. I see the program to make both them sweat in stereo that Oscar helped me with is working perfectly. HEE HEE! ZAP! SPLOOSH! OUCH! EWWWW! Ummmmmm... So Jumbo Shrimp brings in his Swedish model and it's a robot blond who talks with a metallic voice. Good thing Oscar has a "date" or else he should BE JEALOUS! HAHA!
So Milo yells for Bea to comes down right now and we head to the staircase with piano music and spotlight as Bea showcases her pink sparkle dress. And outside of the colors and music; this is the exact same spot that this company did with Kim Possible and Erik in So The Drama about seven years ago. I'm just saying that it's been done before and Kim Possible did it better because Kim Possible is so much better than Bea ever could be. And Steve Jackson is not a monster cyber droid heel. He's just a dumb blond male orange fish with a great jackhammer background. So a blue bird gives her purse and I should note that the bird is underwater and doesn't have a fish bowl on his head just to break logic and reason even more. So Steve greets her and likes the dress like a sexist male would as the music cuts out and then Oscar freaks out because Angela is wearing a storm trooper mask. Ah; so she loved "The Shockmaster" promo from 1993. She takes off the helmet and is wearing a lime green dress; and she does look awfully well in it too. Still; I love Angela more the character than what she is wearing. Dorkism and projection in my little head makes it so. It's a VR storm trooper helmet which is basically Nintendo On. I don't need to tell you how stupid this is. Forget the lack of fashion sense; because that won't stop a geek from buying it anyway. It's just that if she wears it at all times; she is liable to not see where she is going and get hit in a car. It's just daring a lawsuit at this point. Angela is still awesome with her moves which look crisper than Drake Mallard and she isn't even trying. Bea's mother gets the camera and her contracted line and we flash and segue to the limo driving on a lonely road. We see Jocktopus, Bo Gregory, lots of kids and Clamantha enter the limo as it's all disco inside. So Shellsea is in charge of the limo arrangements. I like it. DISCO~! POW! OUCH! Ummmmm... Clamantha cuddles Oscar good and her puffy pink hair, so the limo stops and Clamantha is thrown out and the limo leaves. Clamantha doesn't like it at all. So now we are into clamism?! What a bigot Oscar is?!
So we ramp up from the fish tank and down onto the checkered floor of Bud's petshop; and then ramp up into this Hollywood style spotlight property shrine complete with a container like fish tank which just looks weird. And the contrived motions of the limo make it more hilarious as it drops down and lands in front of the front doors leading to where the Fish Prom is. Whatever. The babyfaces come out and enter onto the dance floor as everyone is here; even Mr. Baldwin who I would think he wouldn't be part of this show. And up pops Fimberly with her red afro and tight green bowtie. Until I realized that it is a button for her green dress. When are these writers going to stop beating up Barenaked Ladies? Bea tells her to calm down and everything will be fine. So we seperate and Bea holds hands with Steve Jackson. Steve goes along and proclaims that he needs to go to the bathroom to freshen up and Bea is okay with that as Steve leaves. Can you feel the Bea/Oscar relationship being revived here? I sure do as Oscar is nervous while Angela is still acting like an awesome dork with the Nintendo On helmet. She also punch buggies Oscar on the arm. HAHA! Oh; that wasn't on purpose, no siree! Pay no attention to the Sony Off helmet behind the curtain. Oscar is hoping to make this night special for her (he is so noble to the end isn't he?) and we cut to Shellsea and Miss Lips exchanging notes on keeping their options open and Miss Lips still cannot buy a break. That was pretty awkward. Pass, Punt and Fumble call each other stupid near the punch bowl and no one cares. Steve enters and apparently; one of the football players spilled blue liquid on the floor. Steve is the personification of Teddy Ruxpin; only with blond hair and a much bigger airhead than Launchpad McQuack; so he goes to the janitor closet to get some cleaning supplies and the door is unintentionally slammed shut and barricaded by a wagon full of steel folding chairs. Ah; so Jockotpus is having an ECW wrestling match with Albert, Jumbo and Oscar in a handicap match. One Vs three and "One" is winning. And it's Fimberly who unintentionally barricades the door. So she's the one who revived the Bea/Oscar relationship?! SHE'S A WITCH! GET HER!
Fimberly is confused as she floats off to leave Steve knocking at the door. So we head to the table with Milo, the sisters of the CGI Ginuea Pigs and the EVIL ONE himself. I soon realize that Milo's date has a green ribbon and not a black one; so I'm sorry for not noticing that earlier. Damn; this footage seems to be getting more blurry as I'm watching it. Milo and green ribbon sister exchange notes and have a good time. The purple one munches on lettuce and Randy is bored because he got the boring one. Yeah; besides the ribbon; that is how we tell them apart. So if Randy was trying to screw Milo over; it clearly backfired. So Randy motions to Milo and wants a conference right now; which Milo sells without question. Randy wants the sister exchange and Milo no sells those bill of goods right away as Randy demands the sister; but Milo blows him off as a jerk and walks off with the green ribbon sister. HAHA! FINALLY! Randy gets his comeupperence and Milo actually looked smart for a change. Best part of the episode right there...And now we go downhill again as Bea is calling for Steve as we see Escarmargot sitting down on a chair looking glum with Albert looking the same about an extra chair to the right. Bea floats off as we get the awkward moment of doom which involves doing nothing of note and see if the kids laugh at it spot. This is still a better spot then having canned heat on every live action show the new Disney did and then having it taken to vast extremes at Nickeledeon and shows like iCarly. Oh joy! NOT!! So we see Angela punching and kicking ass all over the joint and the table; and Jumbo Shrimp's ass. Thankfully; her robot date is still working perfectly. Oscar is having to clean up the mess and apologize. Apparently; we discover that the robot's name is Annika. I'm guessing we aren't going to find out who the CGI guniea pigs are aren't we?
Jumbo claims that Annaka's circuits are fragile and then does the shifty eyes spot to amuse me. So Oscar backs up while cleaning his suit and notices Bea sitting down looking not so good. UH OH! Yes; they are finally going to pull the trigger on the already aborted angle because apparently; Mary Jane Watson wasn't over enough to redo this. They exchange notes for a bit talking about having a "good" time as Bea's date was screwed by Fimberly...allegedly. And Oscar's date is awesome at kicking ass and taking names that are not on Oscar's good side list. Or something along those lines. So we do a tense tease; but Bea floats off to look for Steve because apparently; Oscar showed her a smart phone photo of Angela trying to punch Oscar in the mouth which looks like an engagement photo. Pffft. Whatever. I should also point out that she leaves just after Jumbo Shrimp and Annika are dancing and apparently; Jumbo Shrimp is way too excited to be healthy. That ends the segment about sixteen minutes in and I'll give Milo this: He has done his job at least in making this thing look not bad at all. However; we still have about six minutes to go in season two; so here we go...
After the commercial break; we cut to a crowd where Mr. Baldwin pops up and blows off Jocktopus for stealing something off screen and then blows off Albert and Escarmargot for not dancing. Leave it to MR. BALDWIN to actually act like a fuddy duddy and like little kids dancing. So we cut to Milo and green ribbon GP doing the most akward dance in the history of fish kind which only serves to make Milo look even more awesome than he was already. So Randy does the "make you look" spot and Milo falls for it as Milo lapses back into character again. Milo demands the better sister back; but Randy no sells and we play "push the date" for a while to waste time. We cut to Bea at the punch bowl as Dan and Anne Chovie are drinking out of the punch bowl for no real reason that I can think of. And then we get the lamest excuse of a use of bit players I have ever seen as Bea asks about Steve and they don't know. Bea wants to be dancing and enjoying prom right here and right now. So the Chovie Twin want to dance with Bea and Bea pleas for them not to. So Dan and Ann grab Bea and we do the Twirl-A-Hurl dance as you have to remember that they filled themselves up with punch already. Thankfully; they don't vomit and they throw Bea into the table and the punch bowl lands on her dress and she's soaked with punch. Insert "Hit Bea" joke here. So Fimberly gets up stage and I cannot believe we have gone almost 15 minutes without Fimberly being a bump machine (opening scene notwithstanding of course) and she is on the microphone and no one sells and they are still dancing. Yeap; that's Fimberly's heat; all in one neat little package. So she screams and she sounds like Stephannie McMahon without the implants. Anyhow; it's time to announce the king and queen of the Fish Prom as Bea looks completely defeated. How funny that Fimberly is announcing the king and queen; and yet she is responsible for screwing up Bea's date with Steve Jackson. I hope Mr. Baldwin channels Homer Simpson from that Halloween special where they are trick or treating in the 1700's and everyone chases Lisa Simpson because Homer accused her of being a witch. Bea thinks everything will be fine....
...And Milo and her date win King & Queen of the prom anyway which pisses off Bea a lot and Randy Pincherson EVEN MORE. HAHA! My two least favorite Fish Hooks characters got their just deserts. So this episode is merely fine now. Milo does some animal noises to amuse me as Randy blows off his date and the date shoves him upside down and storms off. HAHA! I am so loving this as Bea looks really sad as Shellsea acts like normal Shellsea (no selling mean spirited lass) as Bea still doesn't know where his date is and we return to the janitor room where Steve Jackson is still locked away inside with the chairs barricading the door. So Bea proclaims that everything is going wrong; so Shellsea does what Shellsea does best, eat a taco and drink down a chocolate milkshake; even remembering to bring them out of nowhere and swallow the entire glass whole. She then gets chest pains and floats off stage left. Yeah. So we cut to Angela being cool and Oscar being not cool as he pushes the button and turns off the video game. Oh; you can guess what happens next now can't you? Oscar wants to dance; but Angela claims that she agreed to come as long as she could play games. Oscar then calls her out on her video game playing and Angela is shocked and appalled. Oscar proclaims that there is more to life than video games; which is hilarious considering that you can say that about cartoons and it makes just as much sense. On that tact; never mind that the people working here are working on a CARTOON like the ones who make video games; so their life is about cartoons/videogames because they are making a living OFF of it. It's that kind of circular logic that makes the "get a life" thing look so absurd in hindsight.
Oscar wants to dance and then "Bea" slips out and Oscar panics and profusely apologizes. And then Angela suddenly remembers that Bea was the one who played her in Oscar Is A Playa which was supposed to KILL the relationship for good; and she gets where this is going and walks out on Oscar for real. This is where I finally realized that Angela was Felica Hardy without the blond hair and that the break up had to happen since Bea is Mary Jane and must be the one to marry despite the fact that Angela has more chemistry with Oscar than Oscar would ever have with Bea since Bea is a jackass. Can you see now why this show is a lame duck now? Remember that this show was renewed because the ratings for 90% of the other shows on Disney networks (including Kick Buttowski) are much worse than this one and they need to fill space; so it had to be renewed despite the lame duck status this show had when they killed off Oscar/Angela in Oscar Is A Playa and then broke logic by bringing them back together for no rhyme nor reason and then killing the relationship again for no reason other than to mimic Spiderman without realizing that it's old and stale as six month old bread. Milo still doesn't have a real girlfriend though; so at least they have a chance with season three to be all right; or do the Miss Lips/Baldwin relationship; but they are adults, so I doubt that will go anywhere. And she float over to Bea whom Shellsea is wiping off the punch as we discover that the dress is a rental. Angela screams that Oscar is all Bea's now and then sobs like a baby and leaves. Wow; what a way to bury Angela there guys?! Now I see why some people hate the new Disney: scenes like this. I wouldn't be surprised if Bea mistakes this as Steve being Angela's girlfriend; but it doesn't happen thankfully. So Fimberly is on stage and she calls for the dancers to hold that someone special because it's the last dance of season two. So everyone except Bea and Oscar get a partner and we do the slow dance with piano music. And it's Teddy Ruxpin Song and Dance routine as Bea wants a milkshake and sobs and leaves the prom as Oscar calls for her.
So we get a long sequence of Bea out of the tank and heading to the Hokey Poke AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) and Bea manages to float at the front of the boat and look over as Oscar follows her. Bea and Oscar exchange notes on the prom which was crappy as Bea never got to dance with Steve Jackson (who is the luckiest fish in the episode right now). Oscar blows this off because this is the most important night in their lives and it's not going to end this way; so he slowly offers to dance with Bea. Bea teases the ship tease while Oscar acts all awkward about it. So Bea offers her fin and to Oscar to follow her lead. So they dance at the Hokey Poke with the wonderful music and singing in the background as this was fine for what it was; but I stopped caring about this relationship since Bea ruined Oscar's relationship with Angela in Oscar Is A Playa. And it whizzes all over the ending to So The Drama as well; because in spite of Ron's goofiness and Kim's perfection salad; they were much more caring to each other than Bea/Oscar could. In hindsight; they should have had Bea date Milo for real and get it over with so they had some good teenage relationship coming into season three instead of having Milo beat Randy Pincherson again. Bassy comes in and clears her throat as apparently; she got Bea's food and drink, but no selling abounds. Bassy leaves as we see caged white birds holding their wings as we dance some more. I just know Clamantha is coming to ruin this dance; I'm betting Bo Gregory's farm on this. Mouse and Snake look on in awe as Bea kisses him on the cheek and thanks him for the dance. Oscar wanted to say something; but the kiss nullifys it. We zoom out to the tanks as Oscar whispers that this is the best prom ever....and then we fade to black and return outside as Angela is about to throw the helmet in the dumnpster; and then Jumbo Shrimp shows up and Annika dumps him! So Jumbo Shrimp notices the helmet and asks Angela about it and that ends the episode at 22:00 approx. Good; they didn't have Clamantha make this ending any worse than it already was. Well; I hope Disney was happy about the ratings this show got because season three is a lame duck now that they basically had to revive a relationship that was dead in the eyes of Fish Hooks fans; create a new one that was even better and then bury that relationship and bury Angela like a bunch of bullies with pens. Nice going guys. I would have ended the series right there and did a new show in it's place. Any new show; even if it was live action. Or even air Phineas & Ferb more. This series is basically over in my eyes. Writing was fine; and Angela was awesome until she got buried, plus Milo was his smooth self. So it was better than I thought it would be. *** 1/4 (65%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Well; we finally end season two with a whimper instead of a bang; but overall, this was a good enough finale in my eyes. I don't get the point of burying Angela like they did near the end of this because Angela was awesome in this and I still think she's a wonderful character with excellent chemistry. Come to think about it; I was hoping that if the Bea/Oscar trigger was pulled, to allow Milo/Angela to surface as one; but that was killed off because they made Angela sob like a baby in front of Bea and that pissed me off. Overall; this was a solid, standard prom story with a good "one upsmanship" between Randy and Milo; but that feud is almost out of steam at this point. Escarmargot/Albert was awkward; but fine. Miss Lips and Baldwin holding hands was goofy and seeing Bea get screwed unintentionally screwed by Fimberly and denied the dance with Steve Jackson and then loses the king and queen of the prom to Milo and a CGI GP was hilarious. And for once; Milo actually grew a brain on Randy's scheming after discovering that the green ribbon one was better than the hot purple ribbon one. So this was enjoyable enough and the singing was really good in this one, almost as good as a Teddy Ruxpin sing-a-long. Almost. Which is next on my ranting radar. Still; I feel conned watching this show because they first build this up to have Oscar/Bea for a season and a half and then did a contrived setup to have Bea date Milo; which was more interesting than Oscar/Bea and killed off the relationship. Then they brought in Angela and she outclassed Bea in every way; character and looks; and since Bea is the main lead of this show, they had to set it up to have Bea ruin the relationship by dressing up as Angela in Oscar Is A Playa; and then make it worse by bringing Oscar/Angela back with no build, nor reason since Bea clearly ruined Angela/Oscar and even Angela should have the two clicks in the making of a clue; but she didn't. To make matters worse; they proceed to kill off the relationship directly and then render Angela into a weak willed dork who cries. A stereotypical dork in essence; after building her as a 3D character who was goofy with a heart of gold. All that just to bring Oscar/Bea back in Peter Parker/Mary Jane Watson form despite the fact that the writers had pretty much forgot about that relationship.
In the end; we have Oscar/Bea back; but no one cares anymore, so it means nothing now. Aladdin/Jasmine was done well because of better source material and much better writing with actual build and context; so in the end, it meant something. Baloo/Rebecca would have happened (in spite of Jymn Magon's denials that it would) if TaleSpin wasn't filler and that would have been even better since Rebecca is a empowered woman who has actual power. Kim/Ron is another great example with So The Drama; and Fish Prom stomped on that corpse despite the fact that it was KIM POSSIBLE who paved the way for female leads. I've already explained in so much detail in So The Drama. This is once again evidence of demographics tainting whatever it touches and it shows the most here. Anyone who claims that Walt's magic is dead is admitting that they learned nothing from how Walt was successful in having the magic in the first place. That is idolization (putting Walt Disney on a pedestal like a god. Something Sean Malstrom really hates despite the irony being lost on him, but still...) of the dumbest kind because it creates excuses like this and then we as viewers are shocked when Disney pulls of this kind of crap. Just because Walt is dead doesn't mean the magic is gone because the magic doesn't come from some god; it comes from learning how entertainment works and how you please the audience. Even the creators of Phineas & Ferb figured this out. So screw you! You all might as well be wearing feathers and flapping like a birdmen. The funniest thing about this is: Bea was fine in this episode. She did nothing to offend me and I can sympathize with her because she did nothing to cause her to be denied by Steve Jackson. It was Fimberly's fault and even she didn't do it out of malice. It was "S*** happens!". So the ending was justified in a sense on Bea's side. I just didn't like the way they treated Angela in the end. I would have had her stammer and then say: "You know Oscar; if this Bea is on your mind. Perhaps it's best that you dance with her than with me." Then Angela floats over to Bea and calmly whispers to her "He's yours now." and then floats out without crying like a baby. Maybe a tear is shed; but only because it will be hard for her to let go. It's called being subtle and that would made a huge difference in this episode. Maybe not enough to make me care about the Bea/Oscar relationship; but it would go a long way to make the kids watching this "care" about these two which is the whole point of a good romance. So there you have it; my tirade of the week.
So that is that for Fish Hooks until the Fall Assortment; because I need to get onto Teddy Ruxpin now; who has his share of problems and some of them actually relate to demographics, although understandable at the time. So......
Thumbs in the middle for this episode and I'll see you all next time.