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Fish Hooks

The Big Woo Rant

Reviewed: 05/28/2017

Ring The Damn Bell; It's Over!

Welcome to the final episode of Fish Hooks as the fish are starring in one episode to show what we already know: Oscar and Bea have eyes for each other. Yeah; let's get this over and done with, now. So; let's rant on shall we...?

The Big Woo is written by Maxwell Atoms, Darrick Bachman, Derek Evanick, C.H. Greenblatt, Craig Lewis, Diana Lafyatis, William Reiss and Noah Z. Jones. Storyboards are done by the story writers except for Craig Lewis and Darrick Bachman; while the direction is done by C.H. Greenblatt and William Reiss. All episodes are done with Toon Boom; thus correcting a serious mistake I made calling this series (and Kick Buttowski for that matter) done in Flash. My opinion is the exact same: Medium don't matter; talent does. Fair warning before I start: Don't be shocked if I sound a lot more annoying than usual, since I'm always like this when a show ends and I want to get my money's worth on it for the years of time wasting I had to do to get to this point.

We begin this one with the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM (Sign: Tearful Goodbyes ) as Bud is in a graduation uniform giving out diplomas to dressed up pet. As Jay Leno would say: Your dog's not going to wear that. *RIMSHOT* We then get string sound effects and do a closeup shot of Bea doing a blank stare. Apparently; Oscar is playing his guitar off-screen and is lamenting about the past four years and how they managed to get through them. Bea's teary eyes grow wide as Oscar proclaims that after the graduation ceremony is done, things must change. This does not make Bea happy as Oscar admits that he was talking about the best way to start the graduation speech. Bea shakes her head and stammers like an idiot because she's thinking "Oscar BOY! Oscar BOY! Oscar BOY!". Somehow, Milo shows up because he was promised some pancakes and then he storms out. Oscar tells him he'll get his pancakes as Bea thanks Oscar and she holds hands with Oscar. Oscar gets off the first "woo!" of the episode and it's so weak it's not funny. He sweats bullets of course, just to be Oscar. Dude gets thrown around more than a Chico Alverez podcast review and I cannot have pancakes right now. Oscar yells that he's coming and Milo and Oscar leave the house and close the door. Bea turns around and it's her house because her parents show up with the most sh*t eating grins in fish history. And Dad is thumping his eyebrows. Why? He did it to be Bea's father, what else could it be? Bea wants to know what is going on and Bea's Dad claims that he hears wedding bells, LALALALALALA~! I never get tired of him doing that as Bea does the 0.3 Rock Lobster Yeti frowning face as a result. Bea blows it off because Oscar is just a friend of her, and Bea's mother elbows Dad in the ribs and Dad no sells it. Why doesn't that surprise me? She blows him off for butting into Bea's business on boy crushes and then pushes him away stage left. Bea blows her off because Oscar is just a friend...she thinks. This is not a good sign for her; if she has to think this out now. So we head to the ROMAN ARENA OF DEATH with a royal blue banner congratulating the graduates.

We head to the classroom with Mr. Baldwin literally showing off his facial expression and gleefully laughing like he is going to be taken to a mental hospital. The students sit in their desks with blank stares wondering; "What the hell is this?". Milo, I think you finally pushed him over the edge and that is saying something! Baldwin is acting like he doesn't mean anything he says after Albert Glass asks if it's because they are proud of him (it's also 2:30 pm which means, they are thirty minutes away from the last unofficial day of school since graduation is tomorrow according to Baldwin) and Jocktopus destroys desk with some octopounding for his amusement. One piece gets stuck in Oscar's afro, for old times sake as he cannot believe it either. Baldwin then wants to get serious for a minute because he hates pranking and wants to tell them that it's not cool at all as Milo watches on and we get an echoy voiceover as Baldwin is in an image telling Milo to prank him, because in Milo's head: "no means yes". Forget him graduating, he needs help in getting this "no means yes" dangerous crap out of his head. Sure; pranking Baldwin isn't all that bad, but this is going to cause massive problems in Milo's future. Milo is yelling at the image as Baldwin's image claims that "prank him" is the only thing that counts and Milo calls it logic. No, it isn't. The real Mr. Baldwin yells at Milo asking if he has listened to him and Milo claims that he has heard that he can prank him because the little image of him said so. Baldwin is flustered and he simply takes the clock hands and moves it to 3:30 pm (so it was an hour left? Geez; that algae day must have been responsible for this.) and the bell rings for the last time. Wait; that's not how it works!

Mr. Baldwin: Look Mr. Weagle; you are right, but it's the last day and no one cares about this show anymore. I just want to get home.
Gregory: Okay; you make a good point. I'll accept this logic break.
Mr Baldwin: Oh, good!
Gregory: PRANK! HAHA!
Mr. Baldwin: Damn you!

Yeah; everyone leaves the classroom as we head to the hallway with Oscar and Milo as Milo wants to go to the Donkey Dealship and Oscar is panicking because he wants to know why they are going to the Donkey Dealership. Ummm; because Milo likes being a jackass. * RIMSHOT * That's not a joke, he wants to prank Mr. Baldwin again. Milo wants Oscar to trust him as we head to the cafetra with Escarmargot, Fimberly, Koi Fish, Shellsea and Bea with books on the table shooting the breeze. Well; except for Bea who is sulking right now. Fimberly shows off a book of colleges as she wants to go to Fish Arizona because she thinks they have good academic qualities in spite of being a partying school. Koi grunts, Fimberly is gravely offended and throws the book right in Koi's kisser. And then she proceeds to kiss Koi's ass and is all apology-ridden, as in not-apology-ridden. Shellsea claims that Fimberly has gone squirrelpoop insane and makes another moronic face as Bea gleefully ignores everyone. Shellsea is eating pizza as nothing is funny to Bea anymore. So Bea has turned into Mr. Enter now?! Oh for goodness sakes, Bea; that's horrible even for you! Bea claims that she cannot tell because it's super personal. In other words; this is the secret she cannot tell; just like in the opening theme song! Except everyone knows what the secret is, because we use our powers of "deduction" and Bea cannot stand the fact that she used this exact excuse to almost kill the Baldwin/Lulu relationship. So; yeah, I have zero sympathy for Bea right now. Shellsea wants to know so badly that she claims Bea has major cramps. So close to saying "craps" there, damn. So Shellsea pushes Bea into the woman's bathroom, which is labeled (Girrrls) of course because it's Shellsea's secret disco bathroom. POW! OUCH! Ummmm... Shellsea wants her to spell it and then channels Rebecca Cunningham from The Bigger They Are, The Louder They Oink and sniffs out the floor to make sure the coast is clear. Don't ask; I'm not into fish quirks. Bea no sells the deal of course, because she's embarrased as Shellsea claims to be her best friend. Still no go. Shellsea then decides to play the deduction card as her eyes start to get smaller and smaller as time goes on. This must be really bad and Shellsea finally admits that Bea has eyes for Oscar and both act like the most horrified fish in the seven seas. Shellsea doing this is funny, Bea doing it is not. Then we jump cut to Shellsea vomitting over the toilet. WHAT?!

Oh come on, Shellsea; that pizza couldn't be that awful. Shellsea thanks Bea for telling her as she explains that emotions are running high; which usually means the number of drugs required to enjoy this angle as Bea looks in the mirror and proclaims that she has already been having this feelings for a long while. I mean; they came out during the Fish Prom episode; the one that killed the Oscar/Angela angle for good. Shellsea claims that they are just friends and you don't want to go there with Oscar as we do the dumb "Fish enters washroom, realizes that this is private and then leaves." spot. Bea then calls out Shellsea on her relationship with Michael and her dating him; but Shellsea blows it off because it's just dating. That's totally different. She has a point, Bea; Bea has feelings of wanting to merry Oscar and Oscar has the same thoughts, too. It's obvious to anyone who is not a moron and has been following this show since the first episode! So basically; Shellsea basically tells Bea not to do anything she will regret. Who? Shellsea or Bea? Because if it's Shellsea, I agree. If it's Bea, who cares?! They hug and Shellsea does the DISCO JACKHAMMER OF AWESOMENESS for probably the last time in this series. So we head to the football field with Dicky Salmons yelling encouragement to the students who are running on the field. I see Oscar, Milo, Escarmargot, Jumbo Shrimp, Albert Glass, and Jocktopus running. Oh and the EVIL ONE is here, too. So Milo and Oscar run as Milo only wants to do this when he needs the bathroom. And really; who can argue at this point? Oscar doesn't like it either; but he was talking about high school in general. Oscar claims that he wants a change after the same four years of crap and Milo claims that nothing changes. That is the most deep and profound thing Milo has ever said, ever. Milo calls for Jocktopus and Jocktopus has Albert in his tentacle and channels Hulk. Which is fine because Disney now owns Marvel Comics. More shooting from Jock as Milo claims that this has been happening since third grade. And yet no one has intervened on his behalf? Geez; Freshwater's mental health is beyond the pale horrible right now as Dicky loves this motivation from him. He's shocked that Savannah calls him "Dicky"?! Milo then takes his shirt off because he has watched way too many Fish Dragon Ball Z cartoons. POW! OUCH! Ummm... And to think; Milo has a slightly better physique then Gibby Gibson from iCarly. Ponder that one for a moment.

Milo twirls the shirt, Oscar protests and Milo smacks the shirt in his face as a result. Milo outruns Oscar to prove him wrong and nothing changes. Kind of like haters actually. Kind of like cartoons actually. Kind of like alternate medicine, actually. I could go on; but we are one third into the final episode and there's still about fifteen minutes left. Milo cannot wait for nothing to change as Oscar is worried and we scene change to AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) as Oscar and Milo are in their beds sleeping and snoring. Milo is only in underwear tonight; so I expect a wrestling match to break out at anytime. By the way; Milo chants "derp" when he sleeps. I think the problem with Derpy in My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic was not the name; but the characters look and personality. No one cared about the name, since derp is just another word for slow. I am very slow in the head (and so is Milo for that matter); but I (and Milo for that matter) look and act nothing like Derpy. Milo is showing off his man boobs as Oscar is dreaming and we HIT THE DREAM SEQUENCE~! We head to Freshwater University (which looks like a church without a cross on it) as Oscar comes in with a pink backpack as a couple of fish greet him, including a ruffin like fish doing fist bumps with Oscar and a professor praising him for his mid-term. Oscar thanks the professor and I should note that the professor is in fact holding a smoking pipe, but doesn't put it in his mouth. I think that's the first smoking reference in a DTVA show since about 1990. Oscar meets Bea and Bea has something she needs to tell him and he's going to like it. Oscar's eyes are giddy as he's ready and Bea shows off her...wait for it...five new boyfriends. Oscar's heart sinks as Bea proclaims that she's glad he's here to sort out the boyfriend relationships he is having. Oh lord; even I would classify this as a total nightmare. Oscar sighs and proclaims that he needs to get going and bails stage left complete with Hanna Barbara running and looping sound effects. Sorry show, but if it is not animated by Sunwoo Animation, that doesn't mean you are watching a classic! Oscar enters his dorm room and suddenly out comes Bea doing a towel on her head and has a towel around her body. She calls him roomie and calls this not awkward at all since they are friends after all. Silly Oscar; it's a dream, it's not like logic breaks cannot be accepted...in a dream. Only Mr. Enter would think that and he basically a Z-grade Church Lady. "What?!" doesn't work.

Bea brings out a pink dress and a blue dress; but not a real pink and blue dress because that's cruel. She's going on a date and Oscar screams in an awkward fashion and does the Scooby-Doo Snow Angel spot on the door to get the hell out of there. He runs out into the middle of the street (looking much cooler than Kick Buttowski doing the same thing) and the Bea's are on the loose and out of control! Like I said, anything is possible in a dream. So Bea is praising Oscar and Oscar runs, finding "Milo" and thinks he's safe. "Milo" then tears off the costume piece by piece to reveal Bea. Damn; even if I hate her, it would have been funnier if it was Clamantha, which would have made us question weither or not it was a dream. Oscar screams no in a lame fashion as the entire area turns crimson red as Bea is basically wearing a toned down version of a wedding dress and is holding a paper of flowers. Did I mention that by fish standards, she's fifteen feet tall? Bea grabs Oscar as she wants Oscar to be her "maid in honor", because "best man" is too sexist, even for this show. Bea throws Oscar into her mouth and her stomach is a giant volcano. So yes; Bea just sent Oscar straight to hell, in his dream, basically. I'm sorry; but it's not as epic as the one Scrooge suffered in Mickey's Christmas Carol in 1983. We return to reality (no, not really) as Oscar wakes up in bed, sweating. Jump cut to Oscar heading to the sofa as he switches on a light and then the lights go out. Okay; who was supposed to pay the electric bill here? I betcha Milo forgot...AGAIN! The light bulb is out as Oscar flicks the switch over and over again, no go. So Oscar yells at Milo because it's his job to change the light bulb. Wow; I almost got it right! Damn; I'm almost good. Oscar brings out a wooden ladder and climbs up to the light bulb while blowing off Milo for being irresponsible. Okay; he didn't mention Milo by name; but he was implying it throughout this blow off. Oscar then gets the LIGHT BULB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY as he has to change it himself if he wants change and suddenly; the light bulb lights up instantly. Okay; this proves Noah Z. Jones does read my reviews now. Because only I make that kind of reference in my reviews. Thanks Noah; you're the breast...I mean, best! That ends the segment nine and a half minutes in.

After the commercial break; we see the STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM (Sign: Prank Donkeys) as we cut to the pet store floor which there is the Donkey Dealership featuring a blue costumed jackass bowing to us. Jump cut to Milo in the area where the Prank Donkeys are as Milo sniffs one and loves it because it has a new donkey scent. As opposed to Milo; which is really old. Oscar is with him of course and guess who appears in this scene. Take a guess, it's too shocking! SURPRISE! IT'S ANTONIO INOKI~! POW! OUCH! Ummmmm...Oh wait; it's still too shocking...SURPRISE! IT'S FISH VARTAN~! YAY! Did I mention that the donkey is a stock footage real jackass?! Kind of reminds me of John Enter, actually. POW! OUCH! Ummmm... Milo asks if it can prank and Vartan shows them the biggest jackass he could find, complete with leather legs as Milo feels the legs of the jackass. You talk about two peas in a pod here?! He also has the same neon light color changing abilities which we saw in Fish Taco. LED technology is so Var-Tan of him, natch. Milo wants to buy this jackass now as Vartan shows off in the hoof the ultimate prank fun red button of doom. Milo pushes the button and the jackass explodes into confetti, leaving the jackass's feet behind. I hope that jackass was a fake; because PETA is going to splash wine on someone's furcoat again. Milo twirls in the water and cannot wait to prank Mr. Baldwin with it. You call that a prank?! It sounds like something you use to surprise Mr. Baldwin at his birthday. Fish Vartan then proclaims that there is one small problem and Milo doesn't like the problem on principle. That's the least of his worries as Fish Vartan states that it's the only prank donkey he has left and farts. Do you get the feeling that Vartan knew Milo was pranking Baldwin with this and set him up?! Jump cut to a shot of the store as Milo and Oscar bail stage left through the store as Milo blows off Vartan's nerve. Milo still has no prank on Mr. Baldwin yet:

Mr. Baldwin: Yeeeeeeeeesssssssss!
Me: Noooooooooooooooooooooo!
Don Karnage: YeeeeessssssNooooooooooooo?!

Oscar is walking with a blank look on his face and Milo asks him about it. Milo tells him not to worry about the prank as Oscar claims that it's not that at all. Oscar claims that he has a lot of heavy stuff on his mind and that's all. Milo claims that Oscar has the hots for Bea and Oscar sweats and panic on cue in that order. Oscar's stammering was awesome here as he asks how Milo knew. Ummm; he used Bea's method of almost killing Mr. Baldwin/Miss Lips: the power of deduction. Milo's deduction you see, is that Oscar talks in his sleep and we scene change to the flashback of Oscar snoring and talking about Bea in his sleep. When even Milo knows the power of deduction, it's time to confess. Milo of course is spying on him; because he has no concept of privacy. Oh; and October is known as Fishtober; because goodness knows if they can keep this straight at all. Girls scream as we return to reality (no, not really) as Oscar's eye twitches; and then rubs his hands because he's embarrased. Milo turns Oscar around and tells Oscar to look at him. Milo rubs Oscar's cheeks and proclaims that his thoughts are beautiful. Personally; his rubbed cheeks are beautiful; but you are not hearing that from me only. Oscar asks if he should tell Bea and Milo blows it off and invokes the POINTY FINGER OF DEATH. Oscar is confused by this as we have officially reached the halfway mark of this final episode. So; deep breath, it's move on as Milo proclaims that he can have feelings, but not act on them because things with change and Bea will of course prove that she is not Oscar's friend at all. Milo wants Oscar to trust him and they walk together stage left as Milo wants to have cupcake to cure the achy heart of Oscar. All right; let's go on stage with Bea with her back to the hard camera bathed in a spotlight. TEDDY RUXPIN SONG OF DOOM ensues with Bea singing for one last time called Fish Amore; and Zeus Mussels cuts her off and demands answers to this outrage. She's singing and it's not too bad, so sod off Zeus Mussels; or I'll send Hulk Mussels to legdrop your mussel muscle ass! Bea admits that she has a lot on her mind and sounds better on stage. Then she should do this more often, she's a lot better when she has a lot on her mind and not acting like an ass...in bed. POW! OUCH! Ummmm... Zeus asks what she is thinking and Bea looks like she's about to cry as she has affairs of the heart. Bea doesn't want to talk about it as she shed tears because Zeus wouldn't get it.

Zeus doesn't get a lot of things except for Beef Jerky; so you have to worry about explaining it to anyone. Mr. Mussels claims that she shouldn't turn back on love, which isn't a bad thing in the right context; but context has never been this show's strong point anyway. Zeus makes analogies and brings out a donut to demonstrate two parts of a whole that it not related to a donut. Mussels eats food, I yawn. Zeus makes an analogy about a lonely gym teacher compared to Dicky being a big shot gym teacher; right in front of Dicky who has a mug of coffee in his right hands. Uh-oh! Dicky Salmons is not amused and just walks out. To be fair; this was Zeus' fault for being such a whiner, but Bea indirectly kills another relationship. I think. Bea is told to make it work and then gets shooed off stage with the HUNDRED ARMS OF DOOM because it's Flash and only angry haters care about it at this point. Bea sulks and walks off stage as we scene change to below a purple leaved tree and vines. Below it is a wooden bench somewhere in some park as Bea sits down sulking. I discover that it's a wooden bench swing. Bea sighes as flowers bloom and humming ensues. The clouds above (yeah, I don't get it either) form Oscar just to rub it into Bea some more. Then as Bea is looking around, Oscar appears with a sockpuppet which doubles as a cupcake and sounds like Milo for some reason. Bea is scared to death; but it's Oscar with two cupcakes with Bea and Milo stylized faces on it. Strangely; no Oscar version of it, so I assume he ate it. Oh wait; the picture's cropped; so the Oscar one is off-screen. Damn! So Oscar sits down with Bea next to her and admits that the cupcake icing thing made them look uber creepy. So they exchange thoughts for a while. Oscar asks if it's about the speech and Bea claims that it's not. Basically; they have other feelings besides moving on with their lives. Oscar sounds awkward as usual. Forsenic guys would point out that Oscar is basically lying right on the spot when he starts claiming that it's only college he is worried about. Oscar claims that not everything will change because they will still be best friends through to the end. Oscar pats Bea's back as he splits the Milo cupcake in two and she gets to eat the head. Oh god; Milo is going to be pissed off by this. Personally; I don't care. They eat cupcakes for a while as Bea calls Oscar sweet and flowers bloom some more. This guitar playing is annoying me now as this is overbooked now.

Bea dares Oscar to name one thing that wasn't sweet and Oscar throws a cupcake in Bea's face and bails giggling. I have been waiting for someone to do that as Bea playfully consider this a challenge and chases Oscar for three seconds as Bea throws a cupcake, it hits Oscar's afro and Oscar completely oversells it and splats on the ground. That made me laugh because it wasn't a head shot (it hit Oscar's afro); but it was sold as a head shot anyway. So they chase each other some more as we scene change to Bea's kitchen with Dad and Mom at the table exchanging notes. This is going to be a riot, I just know it. Dad is being a clueless dolt and I laugh as Mom blows off his idea. I'm going to leave it as an exercise to the reader, because Bea has come in. Dad is still clueless as Mom assures Bea that Dad is clueless as usual. I think this is the first time Bea's mother has actually acted like a concerned parent. Which is kind of sad, because her gentle overbearing gimmick was hilarious. I guess even she has decided Bea has grown up and this would punching down on her. Bea asks how they knew they were right for each other instead of being merely friends. Mom claims that they became friends and then stuff happens. Wow; that is the most accurate explaination I have ever heard about this. Bea asks about concerns about ruining the friendship because he's Bea's Dad. Dad proceeds to do a raspberry while breaking through the newspaper and reading it. I am going to be so sad when this series ends in the next six minutes or so, because he is awesomely stupid here. LALALALALALALALALALA~! That never gets old. Mom claims that it's a feeling and Bea wants her to describe it, complete with clipboard with paper and a pen. I'm not going to describe the analogy they use here because it's so over the top that I was laughing too hard at it. The guise of this warm fuzzy feeling is called a "woo"! Slick Ric; where are you?! Sadly; the fuzzy feeling doesn't include a broomstick. Woo! Woo! Woo! Bea is like "not woo"! Mom asks if this help and Bea claims she sort of does, which means she doesn't. Bea admits that she doesn't feel the "woo" yet! Well; date Ric Flair and you'll know what it means! Woo! Mom and Dad conclude that it means it doesn't feel right...LALALALALALALALALALA~! I love Bea's Dad, he's such a tool for me to be amused at. Bea bails stage left sulking as she prepares for her speech.

So we cut to Bird Mom's birdcage as she helped Oscar and Milo into their informal clothes for the ceremony later on today. Milo questions the reason why they have to cover their white shirts with gowns. Well; then you won't be naked fish. Easy. Bird Mom vomits and guzzles to spit out two black gowns and Milo waves and thanks Bird Mom (yes; that's her name, don't ask) as she flies away with feather's flying. Oscar tells Milo that he wants to remain friends with Bea as Milo tells him to keep it bottled like they promised and he tells Oscar to think about all the things they did over the ages with him. Whatever as Milo dives down to find him cumberbund and crashes off-screen as Oscar isn't amused by this. Oscar proclaims that maybe he should trust him as we HIT THE FLASHBACK~! So here's what happens: Child Milo (with propeller hat) almost gets eaten by a crocodile mistaking it as the entrance to a cave. Jump cut to Milo with scissors. Jump cut to Milo with a jar of peanut butter as Oscar looks in the mirror and his afro is almost completely gone. Jump cut to Milo wanting to put his finger in the pocket socket before we finally return to reality (no, not really) as Oscar proclaims that he should stop trusting his brother and trust himself and proclaims that he's going to tell Bea how he feels. And that ends the segment seventeen and a half minutes in. I'm not feeling a woo here; but I'm not feeling an "UGGGGHHHHHH" here, so that's a good thing, thank you. All right folks; that is all for the episode material that I didn't see before I saw the Russian version of this episode which aired long before Season three even started. The final five minutes is basically the graduation ceremony. I have already mentioned in my Livejournal in January of 2014; so most of the main points have been spoiled here. So, here we go, the final five minutes of Fish Hook will full commentary this time.

After the commercial break; we head to the ROMAN ARENA OF DEATH and then pan over to the field as we head all the trappings of a graduation ceremony outdoors. Everyone is dressed up in their best clothes, including Zeus Mussels with hair and a tie. Graduates walk in and sit down in chairs as the music plays. It's original music; no Pomp & Circumstance, I guess that they felt there was too many versions of songs that have been copyrighted to do their version without triggering a lawsuit. Clamantha gets off her contracted line of the entire episode as Fimberly is in a panic about picking Fish Arizona as her college destination. Pan over to Steve Jackson admitting that he has no clothes underneath the robe. Hee hee! He lights up like the sun and this distracts Fimberly because we have to have her take one last bump into the ground before the show ends. At least Koi and Escarmargot did the exact same thing, so at least this version was a shared effort. We have a fish pileup on aisle zero! The Lobster Nephews, Razor Von Doom as we cut to the line as Shellsea is talking to Bea as Bea is sulking more and more. Bea admits that she doesn't feel the woo and that Oscar is not right for her. Shellsea doesn't like parents; but she agrees with them. This means Shellsea has turned on Bea right there. LALALALALALALALALALA~! Zeus is yelling as Miss Lips has taken a smoke break and Deranged Kermit finally makes an appearance. Zeus tells them to take their seats as Jocktopus runs in the background taking a chair and apparently was going to bash Albert Glass with it; but Zeus calls him out on it. Jocktopus still no sells and we hear a chair breaking. Jump cut to Milo sitting beside THE EVIL ONE as he still doesn't have a prank for Mr. Baldwin as this is totally last minute stuff. Bea sits down next to Milo, Albert is behind them. Milo ponders if he should use a rubber chicken or fake poop. Randy tells him that they are too late; and I just realized that Randy's voice sounds like Swiper The Fox from Dora The Explorer! That bastard, how dare he?! Even worse; Randy has combined a whoopie cushion and a rubber chicken, placing it on Baldwin's chair. Baldwin swims down and we faaaaaarrrrrrrrrrttttttt right next to Miss Lips; of course. Everyone is in shock, except for Bud who giggles straight at the hard camera while mopping the floor. Why doesn't this surprise me that Bud the Larry The Cable Guy reject would laugh at such humor.

Randy wishes he was Kenny Powers...AGAIN as he stands up and basically admits his guilt right there in front of Mr. Baldwin. Wanna bet he blames Milo for it anyway?! Milo is angry and is screwed, which would be a good thing as Jumbo Shrimp tries the old "bash the beachball in the arena" spot and his throw was so bad that he should have quit while he was far ahead. I mean, before he blew up the beach ball. It floats up to the water and we move on as Oscar sweats like bullets and finally the moment has come as Oscar proclaims that he has something to tell Bea as Milo knows where this is going and cuts off Oscar pleading for him not to do it. Oscar tells him to put a cork in it and Milo does the Gruffi pose feeling so disrespected. So Oscar finally reveals his true feelings to Bea, feeling everyone including the two fish knew from day one, but were too awkward to admit it. Oscar admits that he loves Bea; and avoids the word love a million times. For goodness sakes; Love is not on the forbidden word list; you stupid BS&P~! Bea then says that she doesn't know how she feels right now and apologizes as Oscar is crushed. Milo blows off Oscar like an ass; because he told him so. So that is that, or is it? So Principal Fishington arrives in robotic form and speaks like a robot as the crowd cheers as Bea is going to give the speech of doom right now. Jump cut to Bea's parents, Clamantha's parents, and Fish Vartan looking on as Mom is cheering and Dad is using the camera while wearing a sambero made of pizza. Even now; he is slaying this scene even though he has no business doing that. That made me laugh. SQUEEEEEEEEEE~! Bea finally makes on the stage and is at the microphone and she is awkward in doing it as she brings out the script and greets the crowd as Clamantha talks. Shut up, Clamantha, no one cared about you since the Flores Dores Gorgeous finish! So Bea starts her speech and I'm going to transcript the entire speech for your viewing pleasure:

Bea: When I first started at Freshwater, I was like "High School!" And now that we are graduating, I'm like "Bye, School!" (Clamantha: Hello!) These past four years has been the best times of our lives. We've all grown close (Fimberly and Shellsea embrace each other.), we've shared laughter, and...tears... (Oscar looks glum as Albert, Jumbo Shrimp and company ruffled their hair) and through it all, we have been there for each other. We'll never forget all the good times that we had. As friends. (Bea and Oscar look at each other and we hit the flashback montage in black & white showing footage from Milo on the Lam, Live at the Hamsterwood Bowl, Assignment: Babies, and Fish Prom with Right By Your Side as the TEDDY RUXPIN SONG OF DOOM. Okay; I admit that the flashback did make me shed tears here; so it was pretty damn effective. We return as Bea squeaks on cue.) But it's now time for everything to change, because...I like you too, Oscar! I...like, like, like you! (Oscar starts to smile gleefully.) Like more than friends! Aha! Wooooo! Heh heh. Woooooooooooooo~! (Everyone talks among themselves; except for Oscar who is loving this as Bea floats up, twirls and screams.) Whoo-hoo! (Dad/Mom: Wooooo!)

So yes folks; Bea finally admits her feelings to Oscar, that was the guise of it. To be honest; I don't hate this becuase when they did the flashback of Oscar and Bea together, it was damn effective in making me cry and it was because no matter how pointless this payoff is; it was pretty honest and geniune, at least to me. I felt Bea has become a much better person as a result in spite of her assholish ways, so the character finally got developed to my liking now. Good for the writers to do this, even if it was too little, too late to save the show. Milo hugs Oscar and completely ignores everything he said before the speech started. Why doesn't that surprise me?! Oh; wait, the speech is not over yet:

Bea: It has been four years of good times and bad times. Of adventures and close shaves. I would have never guessed that things would have turned out this way. But as we swim onto uncharted waters, as long as we stay together, we will always be a school… of fish! Diddly-doo! (Crowd cheers on cue.)

That was a really fine speech and the subtleness of Bea's awkwardness during the beginning of the speech really helped this one a lot since it set up the payoff. So Milo tells Oscar to walk to Bea and embrace her. Never mind that three minutes ago; he was blowing off Oscar for admitting his feelings. So Milo floats up as Oscar and Bea head on stage and we end the episode with everyone singing the opening theme song as the only change to the song pretty much was the payoff to the "secrets they cannot tell" part; which as funny as Gotta Sing an Octo-Tale is as a line; but Gotta Secret I Can't Tell was purporsely written in as a setup to the payoff of the final episode. Everyone throws their hats and we sing and dance as the Chovies shred their diplomas and Clamantha turns into a pink butterfly via her magic. Pfft; whatever. Rocktopus and Jocktopus' mom mug with Jocktopus on camera, Escarmargot and Albert have eyes for each other and yes, they officially kiss to seal the deal. Dicky is crying with Oscar and Zeus gives the thumbs up. Jumbo Shrimp comes in via rocket pack, Fimberly bumps while getting the diploma; because the writers cannot even let Fimberly do one thing right without screwing it up. Koi and her mother embrace. Bea signs her name on the dipolma and Michael and Angela finally make their appearances. Did Angela really fall from grace since dating Jumbo Shrimp or what? Fishington gets spiked by a prank by former Principal Stickler (using himself as a pet rock on her chair), because no one can die on this show. Bird Mom photographs the trio; but Milo gets into the picture. More pictures ensue jackhammered in; they are much better taken as we end with Oscar and Bea BEFORE HAPPY HOUR (sunset) doing a kiss as we fade to white to end the episode...Oh wait; we end with Milo and Baldwin on stage as Milo has a cream pie behind his back as Baldwin proclaims to Milo that he has nothing for Milo because he's not graduating. I'm pretty certain you cannot withhold a dipolma someone earns; even if he pranks you. Milo drops the pie and shakes Baldwin in protest as he falls to the ground crying. Baldwin tells him to calm down and brings out the diploma anyway. That is a great punk out by Baldwin. Milo cannot believe Baldwin pranked him on that one. Baldwin gives Milo the diploma and Milo declares himself the king of the world and bails. The series officially ends at 21:55 with Milo slamming a pie in Mr. Baldwin's face. Woohoo! I think that's the only way I could accept that moment. Well; this was a good episode; but not great mostly because the whole thing was telegraphed far in advance and the secret was pointless. But the journey was fun and the finish/ending still was effective so *** 3/4 (75%).

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THE REVIEW LINE

Well; we finally end the series on a surprising good note. When I saw the ending to Fish Hooks in Russian in 2014; I was not happy with it because I knew that the guise of it was Bea admitting her feelings to Oscar, which is so pointless and just there to payoff a secret everyone knew. That being said; the acting in that moment was much better than the Russian one and it took the pointless payoff and made me care about it enough that it was damn effective. The black and white flashback also helped a lot and the funny ending was a riot as Baldwin and Milo all got what they wanted out of this. The build before this was pretty much what I expected and everyone basically were themselves in this one, which is fine because it's the last episode and you are supposed to shoot the breeze like nothing before. Overall; this episode was very good and a special mention to Bea's Dad for being the MVP of this episode. I am very sad this show is officially over now, knowing that I'll never be able to see him again amusing me for my pleasure. So this officially ends the Fish Hooks series for good. The final tally after 110 episodes: 22 thumbs up, 21 thumbs down and 67 thumbs in the middle. So yeah; don't listen to those who think this show absolutely sucks. This show is sort of okay. The show is what it is; which is A Buzz On Maggie with fish and a pet store. Nothing more, nothing less. Yes; it's difficult to get back into a series four years after abandoning it for new stuff; but I came back to it and it was more of the same. Personally; I will say this about Bea: She got much better in the later episodes and most so, the final one where she was really effective here. Poor Angela though, knocked down to dork status with Jumbo Shrimp, which has to be a slap in the face for the Oscar/Angela guys out there. But; this is what the writers wanted, they wanted a Peter Parker/Mary Jane Watson relationship and they got it. Everyone else since was a hit or miss; although the Chovie Twins are kind of creepy in their own way. So there you go; I'm sorry I didn't go on a final tirade on this show because there was nothing to get angry about. I don't hate this show and it entertained me, so there's that. So next up for new Disney is to finish Kick Buttowski; but that's this fall. So...

Thumbs in the middle for both shorts and I'll see you all next time!

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