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Kick Buttowski: Suburban Daredevil

Switching Gears/Garage Banned Rant

Reviewed: 12/23/2011

Do Be Like That, Little Girl!

We finally made it to the episode that had one of the most hilarious moments in the new Disney. Sometimes; the ADHD booking can result in interesting entertainment; and Garage Banned has a scene that is awesome. And Kick forms a band to save his garage and goes BMX biking. How do these episodes do? Let's rant on shall we...?

Switching Gears is written by Derek Dressler and storyboards done by Troy Adomitis. The direction is done by Chris Savino. Garage Banned is written by Derek Dressler (who did story) and Carl Faruolo (who did storyboards). The direction is done by Chris Savino. All episodes are done in Flash of course.

Opening Moment #1: The title card shows a faceless Kick racing a shadow bicycle racer with his bicycle.

Switching Gears: We begin this one with a black screen and then the garage door opens up as Kick and Gunther introduce themselves to the blue ten speed. Kick rides the bicycle out of the garage while Gunther rides a skateboard scooter. Kick steals Cheetah Chug bottle from Wade who is in front of the Food -N- Fix and Kick drinks up complete with roar. Whatever Kick. And he doesn't forget to recycle, natch. Kick jumps over the glass window and we do the Matrix move. This leads to a long sequence of riding up and a pan shot towards Deadman's Drop (of course). Kick stop at the cliff; and allows himself to watch the ramp so Gunther can ride in panting since he's TOO FAT. And Gunther faceplants of course as Kick wants the time and Gunther claims that there is 17 hours and some minutes until the BMX Rodeo. Gunther questions doing a big stunt before the big show; but Kick wants to practice from half court. Gunther than makes an allusion to Thanksgiving dinner which Kick wishes he didn't hear. Then we see a stunt biker who parachutes in front of them and does the John Morrison whiplash effect with his hair when he takes off the helmet. Two more men parachute in; with uniform and it's the DiPazzi Twins from Clothes Call. You know: Michael Anthony and Anthony Michael. Still don't care about you two. Gunther realizes that this is Gordan (Gordie) Gibble who wears banana yellow lens on his white sunglasses; thus making him the Gedo heel by proxy.

Gordie Gibble is voiced by Will Forte who has a multi-leveled resume starting with the David Letterman show in 1997 and then started animation on Clone High as Abe Lincoln, the movie Around The World in Eighty Days as Young Bobby, The Brothers Soloman as Dean Soloman, Baby Mama as Scott, and MacGruber as the lead character. Kick Buttowski is his DTVA debut. His most recent credits are as follows: Rock of Ages, Tim & Eric's Billion Dollar Movie, Donny's Boy, and Neighbourhood Watch. He has 46 acting credits, 14 other credits (mostly for the MTV Music Awards), 23 writing credits (mostly for the MTV Music Awards), co-produced 27 episodes of That 70's Show and 25 Self credits. He taunts Kick with the SHINY TROPHY OF DOOM which causes Gunther to be taken back; but Kick no sells as usual. Geez Kick; have some class and sell the damn thing already. I'm tired of you burying heels like that. He's going to win the BMX Rodeo and keep the trophy, cue evil laugh, cue Gunner & Murphy security guards laugh. Come to think about it; Gunner and Murphy would be better names for the DiPazzi twins although Disney would be violating Panda Energy's trademark. Kick does the Gruffi pose and asks what he plans to do that. Gordie claims that it will be the same as last year and we hit the flashback as Kick has the lead in the race; but Gunther is inbetween the DiPazzi twins and they slap Gunther's cookie dough (I think) out of his hands and it splats on Kick's face and he wipes out into the haystacks as Gordie crosses the finish line for the win. Gunther calls it the cheating; but Gordie claims that he only cheated with the best bike money can buy. So he's implying that his bike does not meet the regulations of the race? Owwwwwww...

So Gordie leaves as the goon squad screws up their lines as usual and leaves with him as Gordie gets one more parting shot before leaving. Kick does his usual banal catchphrase of Let's Do This; and it's still worse than Luican (both the original, Enix dub and fandub combined.) of course because Kick cannot act properly to make it work. So Kick rides down the cliff and onto the ramp as the heels are behind a rock and Gunner Michael (That's Michael Anthony's new name and I'm sticking to it) pop up to proclaim that it is the rider. Gordie tells him to shut it and Murphy Anthony (Anthony Michael's new name and you guessed it) brings out the slingshot and slingshots a rock on the bicycle wheel and Kick flies into the air and crashes into the spike mountain about ten feet away much to Gunther's horror. He falls down on the ground looking plain weird and his naked ass is partially showing too. Gunther comes over as Kick needs an ambulance. Gunther asks if he's injured badly and Kick sezs no; and points to the destroyed bicycle and Gunther screams like a girl. And he's SHOCKED when Papercut Peterson calls him a little girl. More on that in the next episode rant. The heels laugh their asses off and bail stage right. So we head to the Skidzeez Bicycle Shop which so happens to be sponsering the BMX Rodeo in about 17 hours from now. We cut to inside where we pan east to two African Americans (a fat one with curly hair and the other wears a hat and has blond hair) and they are fixing an orange bicycle. We then see the door open and they are shocked and appalled as Kick brings his bicycle in complete with thunderstorm. Oh TAG guys! It's not that heart-breaking Kick.

The fat kid sells it like mad and calls the bicycle Bonesaw and acts like Baloo's emotional attachment to the SeaDuck; only more forced and contrived. And it makes no sense anyway. The fat kid cries like a baby as the blond haired dude addresses Kick and Kick asks if they can fix it. The kids put the bicycle on a stretcher and wheel it into a room with white double doors like it's going into the emergency room. Now this is not funny guys! Doing medical spots for comedy is like trying to do out of context fart jokes. No one; not even small kids laugh at it. Kick and Gunther look on and then walk out stage left as we hit the montage of bicycle surgery. I'm not calling this. So after we waste some time we cut to Kick and Gunther waiting outside and the two kids walk out and lower their heads indicating that the bicycle is dead. Kick screams like an idiot and the two kids inform him that the bike will live on; but will not be in race shape by the time the BMX Rodeo ensues. Kick pleads for them to fix it because he cannot live without Bonesaw. What a dumb name for a bicycle?! It's bad enough that Kick has banal catchphrases; but does he have to have banal names for his processions too?! And it's not only copyrighted as a video game and a character from Spiderman; it's so a sexual position. Nice one guys, watch the old Disney guard explode into anger fits now. To SOPA backers: SOPA will hurt you a LOT more than it will hurt the consumer. Trust me on that one; since you keep using that term. Gunther tells Kick that they have one hour till race time; so it's time to get a new bicycle. Now that is a reasonable thing to do; but Kick is not reasonable, like most DTVA characters. Even Kit F'N Cloudkicker is crazy. I mean; who else would be willing to go outside a plane when the air pirates shoot their bullet shooting guns? He almost got shot in the head for goodness sakes!

Kick wants to give up and sulks towards the door; but Gunther reminds him that it's the rider, not the bike and if he allows himself to be a hypocrite; Gordie wins again. Kick decides to do it for Bonesaw, but the two kids inform Kick that due to the BMX Rodeo; they sold out all their bikes. I'm going to amuse that these two are Hush and Razz; even though I'm not sure who is who since they have yet to address their names. And we are almost six minutes into this thing. Then we hear rumbling and there is a door with a Danger Keep Out sign. Baloo Thunder, the Cruisin'Art Helicopter, I'm just saying new Disney. Anyhow; Kick wants to know what is behind the door; but the fat kid proclaims that there is nothing and then blows the cover anyway. HA! We then discover that the fat kid's name is Razz on the blowoff. By process of elimination, the blond hair duded is Tony "Hush" Hawk. Good; it was like Pansty and Horace; it took forever to get those names. I have no beef with these names either unlike Pantasy and Horace who are better off called Three Dee and Chip Green.

Hush is voiced by Tony Hawk who if you don't know by last name alone; here's USIMDB's entry: The father of four and husband of one, Tony Hawk is arguably the single most influential skateboarder of all time. Born and raised in the hazy daze of Southern California, Tony has forgotten more tricks than most people learn in a lifetime, and his contributions to the sport are endless -- most recently, unearthing skateboarding's holy grail by becoming the only person to successfully land a 900°. He has 186 Self credits; mostly for his appearance in skateboarding events so I won't mention them here. He has fourteen acting credits; starting with Thrashin in 1986, Police Academy 4 and Gleaming The Cube in 1989. He then returned in 2001 in xXx, Haggard The Movie, and Lords of Dogtown. His television acting appearances are Cyberchase for PBS and Most Extreme Elimination Challenge as Captain of the Geeks. Kick Buttowski is his DTVA debut and his most recent credit is Cubed as himself. Razz is voiced by Ken Hudson Campbell who started in the movie Home Alone in 1990 as Santa. He then proceeded to do movies such as Groundhog Day, Down Periscope as Seaman Buckman, Armageddon as Max, Titan A.E. As Po, Coyote Ugly, The Ladies Men, Dr. Dolittle 2, and Stories USA. Kick Buttowski is his DTVA debut and is most famously known as Chuck and the lust animal in Herman's Head. He has 40 credits to his resume. Meter Men as Doctor Lima is his most recent credit.

Kick goes into the room and we get the usual overwrought sequence for the red bicycle known as #13. Whatever guys; that wasn't so special. And it is in front of a furnace which seems to be at fusion temperture and should melt the bike easily; but it doesn't. Well; I don't expect anyone to do the research on this show if they cannot keep continuity with the clock tower in Kick the Habit. Razz and Hush have zero clue where the bike came from; although Razz does try to explain it and Hush isn't thrilled. #13 is chained up and it's unlucky because anyone who gets on it crashes and burns, never to ride again. Gasping occurs; but Kick no sells because he has no choice. I can think of one: Letting Gordie win and save yourself from getting another concussion and getting dementia and all that bad stuff that WE KNOW NOW thank you very much Chris Benoit. Razz and Hush are a hush on this one as we head outside and go to the sky shot as the BMX Rodeo is actually behind the store. How about that for convenient?! And speaking of Economy of Characters; Razz and Hush are the announcers for the event. We head down as the color clones of Dirtbike Mike are struggling on their bicycles and bouncing as Kick brings in his bike and tries to get on; but #13 is as rebellous as Darkwing Spiderduck's #6 arm. And the neon splash bus arrives as Gordie and his bodyguards Gunner and Murphy taunt Kick some more. Ho hum. We discover that the #13 bike is called the Mustang Menace. Lame-o! It should do called the Unlucky Screwing Menace. Kick wheels the bike away as Gordie proclaims that they will win by a landslide now. Gunner asks if they are going to cheat and of course Gordie wants to since he's a heel.

So we pan up to the announcer's booth as Razz and Hush introduce themselves. Well; mostly Razz anyway as he gets on the desk and introduces Kick on the Mustang Menace. Needless to say; Hush is living up to his name at least and smiling. We head to the starting line as Kick struggles to get the bike lined up to the starting blocks allowing Gordie to mock Kick some more. Kick states that the ride is what makes the bike and Gordie blows him off (and almost sezs ass in the process legit). We see Gunther cheering for Kick and the smell overwhelms him and he runs to the concession stands and buys a funnel cake. He walks and tries to eat it; but he and Emo Kid have a meeting of the minds. And it wasn't at the candy floss machine. The black balloon and funnel cake rise above the air and Gunther claims that it will come down. Emo Kid doesn't buy that bill of goods as we get the long sequence with the bike starting and we are off to see Kick Buttowski get his arms stretched out beyond their limits and still be in last place. Then we get the Rodeo clown clones throwing barrels in the half pipe and Dirtbike Mike's green clone gets squashed. Here's an obvious logic break: Why hire Tony Hawk when this is Extreme BMX racing? Why not hire someone like Mike Day or Scott Clark who are professionals in this sort of thing; or better yet Dave Mirra who not only is an expert directly in this field; he has several video games to his credit. Oh wait; I know why, never mind. Kick goes through the barrels. Huh? Explain THAT one kids!

Razz continues to annoy me by hyperboling every sentence he sezs. And we wonder why BMX racing never got over? Kick turns off the half ramp; and manages to go neck and neck with Gordie for first place. It really is the rider that makes the race; because if it wasn't Kick would be DNF'ed a long time ago. Razz asks Hush's opinion and he gives him the gun sign and Razz sells it as someone who has a brain. Whatever Razz. Gordie and Kick race for their lives as Gordie blows him off and then they ride the stairs down and fumble on their noises to boot. Heh. Then Gordie rides the rails as Razz thinks he's on remote control and of course Gunner and Murphy are cheating as usual, and laughing badly to boot. Kick bounces like a super ball as Razz asks who will live through the horse's eye. Must be the brown eye. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! They circle through the tunnel as Gordie continues to mock Kick; but it fails because when they exit; Kick retakes the lead. D'OH! Stop acting like a dumb heel and cheat to win already! Last stance is the Metal Horseshoe of Whatever as Gordie finally concedes that the rider does make it and pushes the red button on his helmet. That signals for Gunner and Murphy to invoke the bola of doom on the front wheels and Kick ejects and smacks into the unforgiving steel allowing Gordie to retake the lead and be far ahead. Kick is so screwed now and it's all over. Yeah right?! We all know what is going to happen next eh? Kick falls and out of nowhere comes Bonesaw to the rescue as Kick is saved and they have a bonding moment. WHAT THE HELL? Doesn't that contradict the moral of the rider making the difference?! Ah, screw it, the new Disney doesn't make sense at all. At least they showed Gunther with a welding torch and a welding mask on to show that it wasn't magically out of nowhere at least.

Bonesaw breaks one handle and races down; passes Gordie and crosses the finish line easily for the win as Razz nearly chokes Hush in the process. At least Razz has no trouble verballing that Kick wins. Gunther cheers, snaps his fingers and Gunner and Murphy are forced to give the trophy to Gunther. And they hug and cry like babies. Whatever; I still don't give a damn about you two. Gordie rides in; drops on his belly and throws a Christian like temper; thus assuring that he is buried as a heel. Well; it was probably for the best since Kick pretty much buried Gordie BEFORE this race ended when he contradicted his own moral speech. Balloon pops and funnel cake splats on Gordie's face. In the old Disney; that would be the finish and how Gordie LOST the race since that would be ironic. Sadly the kids of the new Disney do not know the meaning of the word ironic, they think it's a vitamin supplement called Iron IC. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummm....Kick jumps off and Gunther gives the trophy to Kick as Razz and Hush are happy to get the trophy back. Wait; so Gordie STOLE the trophy from THOSE TWO?! Kick gets Razz the trophy and states that it's both the rider and his bike. Yeah; let's meet halfway and save face Kick. That is so like you. We get the long sequence of Kick getting on the bike (AGAIN?! UGH!) and Kick and Gunther (on the scooter of course) ride off into the sunset and out of the BMX Rodeo stadium as Hush proclaims that the ride is the truest friend. When the silent one is right; you are hosed as a babyface. Razz thought Hush was his friend and Hush calls it akward. Oh please Hush; he's not gay. Get over yourself you bigot. That ends the episode at 10:40 approx. Started off charming; but went off the tracks with logic breaks and a finish that basically killed Kick's creditability on morality plays. Then again; I wouldn't expect anything less with the vainglorious bastard. And the ending was bad because it should have been the finish. Akward indeed! * 3/4 (35%).

Opening Moment #2: The title card is a house and front lawn in red coloring with a shadow Brad standing in front of it and Kick and Gunther shadows in the front lawn. Whatever turns you on guys.

Garage Banned: We begin with a shot of Deadman's Drop or Widowmaker's Peak (it's hard to tell sometimes) as Kick and his bicycle bounce down the hill to fetch a pail of Lameass Nuts. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! He crashes and Gunther is on the MEGAPHONE OF JIMMY HARTS shouting the dumbest hooray ever. So we cut to the sidewalk with Kick and Gunther walking on it with Gunther carrying the bicycle (GASP! They are following the law? Really?!) . Kick then notices people carrying stuff and panics because it's his stuff. Jackie of course buy the scrab collection. HAHA! Kick then notices a pile of junk near the garage and some kids trying to steal it; so Kick shoos them off. Kick then opens the garage and then the biggest horror in history occurs as we see Brad, Chip Green and 3D in purple shirts, vest and black pants. OH MY GOD! FASHION FAUX PAS, BEGONE FROM MY TELEVISION SCREEN! Oh and they are called the Yeah Brads as Kick demands answers to this outrage. Brad basically proclaims that this is no longer Kick's garage anymore since he's rehersing for the big band bash this afternoon. Actually; it's Harold and Denise's garage; but who cares?! We need a conflict to make Brad look like a heel and this is as good as we can do it. Oh; and Brad does have one fan at least, other than his goons. Brad claims that he'll have the girls crying. Oh yeah you will Brad; crying for their lawyers on a lawsuit for excessive "Soapia Invasion". AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Kick calls him a windsurfing lawyer which gives me a good laugh. Is he implying that Kit Cloudkicker is a lawyer now? Too bad he's no good at it; since he still hasn't won that lawsuit against Disney for breach of contract concerning his role in TaleSpin. Remember that HE'S the reason that the showed existed and he gets buried because Len Uhley thought that him being a former heel terrorist would put him over the top as an awesome, epic character. At least the later happened; so I won't complain...much.

Kick demands Brad to leave and without even seeing the footage; I can use my imagination and figure out what happens next. Brad forces Kick to the wall and shows Kick the paper of the upcoming Battle Of The Band which is sponsered by the Food -N- Fix. Brad also proclaims that the Yeah Brads will win and he will win the garage forever and Kick will be banned from it too. Kick gets punched out and faceplants on the concrete. Gunther runs in and tells Kick to wait for him. Gunther runs in and gets MURDERED off-screen before flying and taking a faceplant on his own on the cold concrete sidewalk. Kick wants to invoke plan B which is to enter the contest of the Battle of The Bands. Gunther doesn't think this will work; but Kick proclaims that they will search the ends of the earth to find the most awesome band that the Food -N- Fix has to offer. Considering that the Yeah Brads make the Jonas Brothers like manly and heterosexual; this shouldn't be too hard. Then they pause for the "Stop talking and see if kids laugh at it" spot. I'm hoping to trademark and copyright these rants in the near future, so then I can sue Disney whenever I want for contempt of copyright. Or maybe not.

So we head to the hideout (which of course is the toxic sludge of the incomplete construction site for a bridge to nowhere) as we cut to Kick on the blue sofa and Gunther bouncing on the blue sofa. Gunther has good news because he has constructed a group of people to play in Kick's new band. Kick goes over to the edge and then he slumps as there are only four people and they are: Emo Kid on flute, yellow shirt guy with glasses on violin, purple jumpsuit woman with shades and of course Jackie The Stalker Whackerman on claironet. Squidward just got a heart attack...Oh wait; that cannot happen because Squidward doesn't have a heart. Nor a backbone. Papercut Peterson waves and gets in front of Gunther; so Gunther blows him off because he's not in the band. Gunther introduces Howie on cello (yellow shirt guy for those keeping track) and he cannot talk to save his life. Gunther introduces Emo Kid (Yes; that is his real name, don't ask me why) on flute, and Mary (The pink jumpsuit woman) is on casttonet (?sp) which so happens to be her dentures. And last on the band is Jackie The Stalker Whackerman who stole Squidward's instrument. I hope that was the case; it's better in her hands than in Squidward's. Jackie claims that she plays it because it sounds like his real name which is Clarence. Kick motions Gunther over and we have a conference on the bridge. Kick paces around and blows off Gunther for finding lame band players. Gunther explains that they are the only one who can put up with Kick's antics and Jackie proclaims in an echo that Kick will never drive her away. HAHA!

..AND NOW FOR THE FUN PART! I'm just going to release the transcript of what happens in this scene because it is amazing in it's surrealness and humor...

Kick: I don't know Gunther, are you sure?
Gunther: {Gets really pissed off.} UGH! A BAND'S A BAND'S A BAND-ZA! {Starts to shake like crazy.}
Kick: Gunther? Why are you so upset?
Gunther: {Shakes and does the funniest faces EVER!} BECAUSE THAT GARAGE IS OUR PLACE! OUR PLACE! {Getting more and more paranoid now.} AND BRAD'S ALWAYS RUNING OUR FUN! {Pants like crazy.} AND IF WE DON'T FIND A WAY TO BEAT HIM...!
Kick: {pleading.} Gunther, calm down.
Gunther: {shouting to the rafters.} NO! NO! IT JUST MAKES ME WANNA.....
Papercut Peterson: {pointing at Gunther.} That little girl's mad.
Gunther: {explosion jackhammer background and girl's scream ensues.} UGGGGHHHH! Oh, no he didn't! {Gunther slams his body onto the ground and starts to dance like one of the Weekenders (I think it's Tito) on the title screen.}

Gunther: {Singing.}Uh! Uh! Uh! Yeah! Come on! What?!
Now I wasn't rised in a violent way.
But this vagabond going down.
Calling me a girl everyday, results in you screaming now. Uh! {
Gunther bites Papercut Peterson's arm and he sells it.}
Goes over to Kick.} Always putting on a smile;
when I all instead want to frown
because that I'm just the comic relief,
When I really want to bite you with my teeth.
Twists Kick's helmet.} Chick-, Chick- Chickerelli, Chickerelli!
Kick: Woah, Gunther!
Gunther: {Singing}And another thing...
Splashes into the water as the band plays with him as he marches} Raisins in my brownies Mom; whatcha thinking?
May I have a word with you in the foyer.
On second thought, I would rather speak to my lawyer
And see the look on her face
when he presents my case and destroys her!
That'll teach her not to mess with me
and a thousand year old brownie recipe.
Don't bake it like that! Uh! Uh!
Don't bake it like that! Why? Huh?
Don't bake it like that! Boom! Please! {
Kick gets giddy.}
Gunther jumps repeatly.} Now why does Miss Fritzpatrick always say
ries to mimic Miss Fritzpatrick; but fails.} "Gunther you're slacking in every way!"
Why do you say that I'm slackin
Because I choose the back of your class to do my napin.
And off to the C-to-the-A-to-the-Terenian
Where all the famous beetle are actin,
my lips are still smackin,
And all my friends are crack-a-lackin,
And all my haters will see me packin....
brings out his out of nowhere sandwich and stops singing.} My lunch! {He takes a bite} Pootie-toot-toot!

Kick: {goes over to Gunther.} Gunther?! Where did you learn how to rap?!
Gunther: Say what?
Kick: Rap?!
Gunther: Oh, that. That's just how I complain when I really get upset.
Mary: Complaining is what rap is all about.
Kick: {helmet reflect the images of the band.} Gunther? You just helped us find our band. {Everyone cheers.} And that band will be known as...The Chimi Changa's {Shown in black letters; red paint splatter on a white background. Which is posterboard against the wall on the zoom out.}

WHEW! Plus five stars for Gunther's rap, minus 1/4 star for Gunther's sexism and contempt for education and minus one star for Kick deciding that lameass name and ruining Gunther's buzz as usual. This is one of the most awesome things I have seen in the new Disney; and considering how average new Disney has been to me (compared to the old Disney) this was a welcome sight indeed. Personally; I would have named them the Screamin Norweigan Stalkers or SNS. But then again; stalking is such a bad word with Disney and Screaming Norweigan Obsessors doesn't have the exact same ring to it. Still better than Kick's name for the band though. Excellent waste of two minutes though; so this is an automatic thumbs up episode so far. Let's see if Kick pisses this away or not. Kick does the double devil pose and proclaims it's time to get the garage back as we have a session started; but it's interrupted by the Purple Jonas Brothers. You know who; you know (camera nods at me). Kick and Brad exchange blowoffs; and the Yeah Brads laugh is worse than the Jonas Brothers singing. Brad and his goons leave to practice as Kick proclaims that he must win and it's time to rock.

So we segue to Kick uncover the green cloth and he has an entire bandstand of electric guitars and drums and loudspeakers. The band is in shock (and wearing color matching Kick helmets of course) and I think you can take one guess where Kick found these instruments too. Can we go through one stinkin episode without Kick stealing? Another reason to condemn SOPA: Hollywood has a knack for encouraging stealing in their plotlines with babyfaces. Can you say entrapment?! I knew you could. Okay; maybe not. Kick forces everyone into their positions as Gunther tries to explain that they cannot play well to save their life. Oh my goodness; Kick is pissing away the episode. For goodness sakes Kick; stop trying to be like Johnny Test. Nothing good ever comes out of it; and you don't have Test's somewhat good looks. Kick wants to rock as we zoom out and everyone turns on Kick and storms away. HAHA! Serves you right for trying to bury your band BEFORE it happens. Gunther panics like mad and runs away stage left with them. The poster flops in the background and Kick blows it off. We then head back to Kick's house as Harold is watering the front lawn and Kick blows it all off because Brad is no good at anything; but being a rotten sexist. Sadly; Kick's hope chest is gone to boot as Brad actually lip syncs and the Yeah Brad cheat by not performing at all. Kick calls this lame; but good as he runs off; but Harold stops him and asks what is the hurry. Kick proclaims that he needs to reunite the band and runs off stage left. Harold is stunned by these events and thus his only use in this episode I bet.

So we head inside the Battlesnax as Kick is yelling for Gunther. We see Gunther with a red cloak sitting at his laptop logging into the usual break up band move after life website. Whatever Gunther. Kick admits that he should have let the band do it's own thing and play to their strengths. Gunther naturally rubs it in because they waded in the sewer water and Kick drove them nuts. Which makes no sense in Jackie's case. Bad logic break there guys. Kick proclaims that they could be anywhere; but Gunther thinks that they are under his nose. Kick is confused as Gunther reminds him that there is only one place tonight for music lovers. Which means we segue to the Food -N- Fix AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) as it is time for the Battle of the Bands as per the poster. We head to the stage as the crowd pops and Wade introduces on stage Roddy Remington from Kickasarus Wrecks. And he sucks at singing and playing the banjo. No wonder Kick hated being in the shrimp suit. Brad boos and everyone booes in out of the building with a thumbs down. I'm all right with that. Wade sweeps Roddy off stage as we cut to Kick and Gunther and Gunther invokes the POINTY FINGER OF DEATH on the band near the lonely punch bowl. Kick goes over and makes small talk with them with the punch bowl and the group no sells him. Gunther forces Kick onto the table and Kick finally apologizes which sounds more hallow than..Oh never mind; I'm done with the SOPA stupidity. It was fun; but the joke is dead and it's time to move onto more important matters. Like some nutjob trying to outnut Glenn "Shoot Blood Through Your Eyes" Beck.

The band smiles anyway; and Wade calls them on stage as Kick states that it's time. Mary reminds them that they don't have their instruments ready; so Gunther brings them into the mix. So everyone gets on stage as Wade introduces them and Kick does his double devil pose. Brad of course blows off Kick because everyone must perform; or the band is DQ'ed. Wade states that Brad has a point and Kick is frightened because he didn't think that part through. I just shake my head in shame as Kick knows garages and he pulls the conveniently placed lever (WRONG LEVER!) and the garage stage rises up to the top of the ceiling. Kick then takes his skateboard and races around making noise on oil drums and barrels as Kick signals to Gunther to rap; but Gunther has nothing to complain about since the band is back together. Nice to see that they didn't overlook that one little detail. So Kick reminds him of Miss Fritzpatrick, the food in the lunch hall and Helga putting raisins in his brownie and now he's pissed off. And then she admits that she does it for fiber. SWEVRE~! Kick is not happy to hear that as Papercut Peterson states that the little girl cannot sing and Gunther has had it and we begin the RAP OF DOOM. I'm not going to bother with the lyrics this time despite the fact that it's not the same lyrics as the original rap. So it's not quite as good as the original sadly. Still better than anything Kick does though. Brad then orders 3D and Chip Green (Horace and Pansty) to push the lever (WRONG LEVER!) and Kick and his band get dropped and their band is destroyed.

According to Brad; the song isn't finished so they are DQ'ed. Wade agrees with them and sweeps them off stage; but he does assure them that they are still friends. Whatever you say Wade; you should have DQ'ed Brad for trying to end the song with his band. I would personally let them sing and then DQ them on that front; but I doubt that will happen. The Yeah Brads get on stage and start singing like professionals as Gunther panics like mad and Kick does the Gruffi pose and proclaims that it is no longer the garage anymore; it's about being together. Hey; there is always the construction site hideout; so Kick doesn't really much of anything at all. Gunther gets mad and starts rapping away stage right as Brad continues his "singing" and then the record skips and repeats as Brad oodles with a blond female girl in a dress as we pan over to Gunther at the record player rapping with it. HAHA! IN YOUR FACE BRAD BUTTOWSKI~! Kick realizes that he's cheating and the crowd throws tomatoes at the Yeah Brad's and they bail stage left like a bunch of Willi Manilli's. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Then we see on stage; Petercut Peterson singing about the little girls and somehow; he does a halfway decent job of it too. He also adds the neck stretch as a nice touch. And a flower meadow and a moonshine jug. He wins as he sezs and the crowd instantly pops for it. I can live with that; and Gunther calms down with me. HEE HEE!

So we return to the street AFTER HAPPY HOUR as Mary proclaims that they didn't win while carrying the band together. Kick doesn't care since Brad won't be practicing in the garage anytime soon and thus Gunther believes that they got the garage back. Kick hears music and opens the garage door to reveal...Harold and Magnus setting up his new band called the Yeah Dad's complete with drumset. Harold is bringing back the band (Wow; didn't see that one coming) and Denise opens the side door and blows off Harold for making too much noise before slamming the door. HAHA! Harold pouts like a teenager and the band is shocked and Kick is frowning as usual. This ends the episode at 10:40 approx. Well; it's not perfect; but it's awesome, due to Gunther's rap. What more can you say? The rest of it was actually pretty good; except for Kick's sudden pissing on the band to rock on. We then see Kick and Gunther deadring Charlie Brown at the wall as Gunther asks how many Brad's does it take to screw in a light bulb, and the answer is seven of them. HAHA! Well; he's got a point there Kick. Kick blinks and that is that. Maybe not better than Kickin Genes; but certainly had the best moment of this season thus far. **** 1/2 (90%).


Well; the big moment in new Disney is in the books. I would rather talk about Garage Banned then talk about Switching Gears since Switching Gears is an example of the bad Disney the critics expect. It started off all right; and then once Kick brought in the Mustang Menace; it proceeded to go down the crapper as logic broke and Kick had to contradict his own rider is more important than ride moral by getting his ass saved by his own bicycle (Hello; I think that's a DQ!) plus the finish didn't make sense since Kick was supposed to be neck and neck and then the black balloon popped and the funnel cake splatted in Gordie's face (Gordie I had no personal beef with; he was fine along with Hush. Razz got more annoying as the episode went on. Still; Hush should have been voiced by an actual BMX rider and not a skateboarder like Tony Hawk) allowing Kick to win in ironic fashion. That would have made for a good finish. Kick winning outright just buried Gordie as a heel and doing the finish after it was over defeated the purpose of doing the spot. This is just poor writing on the writers part.

Garage Banned on the other paw was everything I hoped it would be. I loved Gunther's original rap and the third time he rapped was also good as well (the second one was only there). He is really awesome when Papercut Peterson calls him a little girl. Granted; it's downright sexist of him to do so; but it works as motivation for Gunther to pull off some entertaining television which seems to be a lot less during the ADHD era of DTVA. The finish was fitting and I did like the ending, it was Kick's attempt to turn everyone into rock stars that pissed me off as a viewer. It was contrived and forced and it broke logic since Jackie left with the band despite saying that nothing will hold her apart. She could have said “except for that” when she left; but she didn't. Otherwise; I'm happy with the results and it is among the top five new DTVA episodes ever. Maybe even a top 20 spot on the DTVA list overall. I still pencil Gift Of Whacky as a top ten DTVA episode I should note. So it's almost Christmas Eve and next up is Truth or Daredevil. A full 22 minute episode featuring Kick's grandfather. So.....

Thumbs down for Switching Gears, thumbs up for Garage Banned and I'll see you next time.

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