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Phineas & Ferb: Steampunx/It's No Picnic
Reviewed: 10/01/2017
It's No Picnic In Steampunx Land!
All right; it's time for more Phineas & Ferb antics and here's the summaries for each short: When Phineas and Ferb discover a commemorative coin from the 1903 Danville World’s Fair, Lawrence recounts the events of the festival to them, in which steam-driven devices were introduced and a set of kids, who were very much like them, were preparing for the highly anticipated event. Meanwhile, the kids' pet swan (Sweary), must stop Professor Von Doofenshmirtz from destroying the fair. Then from there: Isabella plans an impromptu picnic for Phineas when the rest of the gang have plans of their own. Meanwhile, Doofenshmirtz uses a Teleport-inator to send his daughter to a movie marathon. Yeah; so this is 4-17 on the animation paper. So; let's rant on shall we...?!
Steampunx is written and storyboarded by Joshua Pruett and Bernie Patterson, the story is done by Dani Vetere and directed by Robert F. Hughes. It's No Picnic is written and storyboarded by J.G. Orrantia and Eddie Pittman, story by Dani Vetere and directed by Sue Perrotto. Animation is done by Wang Films.
Steampunx: We begin this episode with a zoom in shot of the Flynn-Fletcher residence and head into the backyard with Lawerence using what appears to be a steampunkish metal detector on the grass. Either that, or he's steam cleaning the grass. Either way, Perry is already heading towards the fence while Phineas, Ferb, Baljeet and Buford are exchanging notes. They are complaining about nails as Lawerence don't care, and in comes Isabella and her catchphrase. So Lawerence finds something as Isabella basically spells out the irony of finding antiques with an antique; and Buford uses a shovel to dig it up. We discover that it's a coin as Lawerence looks at it. He calls it a commemorative coin from the 1903 Danville World Fair; which I should note is BS because the real world fair was in Osaka, Japan. It's a Progress coin by the way, in which 90% of the inventions in the coin died on the vine, so to speak. So we HIT THE FLASHBACK~! From black and white to actual color as an unfinished blimp moves in the scene. Very peachy indeed. So yeah; the whole flashback is a fair literally covered in a steampunkish motif from the machines, right down to the clothing. In comes a professor wearing shorts and a pif helmet with goggles on rapping about the steampunk future that never came, because oil and diesel screwed it over big time. And bigotry of course, let's not forget that. I cannot do the song justice, nor the spots. It was awesome. I recommend buying the Phineas & Ferb Star Wars DVD just for that. From rooster alarms to all the steam powered machines. Anyhow; the professor notices a white haired man wearing a top hat, having a cane and a pocket watch, beside what appears to be Phineas & Ferb. I should note that the Fireside Girls made cameos in various points during the steampunk rap. By the way; the professor's name is Professor Elemental and he is voiced by Paul Alborough and according to Wikipedia (DANGER! DANGER!): After being approached to do a concept album of hip-hop as it would sound in different time periods, Emcee Elemental created the character of Professor Elemental.
While the album never came to fruition, the character stuck.[2] Professor Elemental has since been seen performing as a solo act or in theatre acts such as Come into My Parlour. He is also popular at steampunk events and has been a headliner at the Steampunk World's Fair and the Waltz on the Wye. The Professor Elemental character first gained notoriety with his music video for "Cup of Brown Joy," (Directed by Moog) which got the attention of Warren Ellis. Since then he has released a new album, continued his work in the community and performed live. He was, until recently, in a feud with fellow "chap-hop" artist Mr. B The Gentleman Rhymer.[3] However, Professor Elemental had a short appearance in Mr. B's music video for the song "Like a Chap", of which Professor Elemental said "much as I hate to admit it, I bloody love that video and am jolly glad [Mr. B] let me gate crash."[4] Mr. B reciprocated with a cameo on Elemental's video for his song, "I'm British" (which also featured appearances by members of the Eccentric Club, of which Elemental is a member).[5] The two seem to have finally settled their differences in the track, "The Duel", on Elemental's 2012 album The Father of Invention, where, after a rap battle, both agree that the other is "jolly good" at what they do and go to enjoy a crate of sherry and some opium. He appeared in the "Steampunx" episode of Phineas and Ferb.[6][7] He collaborated with the steampunk rock group Steam Powered Giraffe on their song "Sky Sharks", from their 2015 album The Vice Quadrant: A Space Opera.[8] Although he is originally from Norwich, Alborough currently lives in Brighton.[3] So yeah; basically seven albums and one acting credit to his resume. The professor shows off what appears to be a giant mech with legs as Phineas and Ferb walk out of the fair with Ferb having a piece of plant stick in his mouth.
Phineas is loving this; but Ferb wants cheese in aerosol cans as we see Lawerence near the horse and buggy using the steam powered metal detector, still hard at work. Lawerence finds a coin and we get the educational line of the day from a narrator! That was different at least. Phineas cuts everyone off and proclaims that he has chores to do. Lawerence agrees and lets them bail and they do as the narrator regains his train of thought and continues the education lesson. Jump cut to a farm as I discover how colorless this steampunkish world is compared to most. In comes Candace with a pole containing two buckets of water singing a banjo song. How low on the diginity scale must this be if Candace has to resort to this to get over? She is about to pass Phineas & Ferb; then cuts herself off and accuses them of skirting their duties of milking the cow (twice), mending fences and f*cking...ERRRR...I mean, shucking the corn, and plowing the fields. Damn; my dirty mind has been on fire since the Nintendo Switch has been selling so well. Phineas is thinking about doing their chores using steam powered technology. Uh-oh! That's luddite talk and Candace isn't having any of that, no siree! Candace whines about doing her chores and I should mention this: they do flashbacks of all of them doing said chores. Candace claims that she would tell Linda and she bails stage right as Phineas points out the holes in her buckets. The wooden buckets on a pole; not her breasts, you sexist morons! In comes Baljeet and Isabella (with 1903's catchphrase) as Phineas is about to explain what they are about to do. No Buford? Odd. Phineas then asks where Sweary is and oh wait, here comes Buford pointing out the squawking as we see a green swan. I don't get the point of changing Perry's spieces in this episode since no one else has been changed outside of their clothes. Buford calls Sweary and his honking creepy. Your outfit creeps me out Buford; so heal thyself! Phineas assures Buford that Sweary is harmless, but Buford claims that he got bit on the ass. Yeah; Sweary thinks Buford's outfit is creepy, so heal thyself...AGAIN!
So Sweary goes behind the barn and puts on a hat and brings out a wind driven radio device which doubles as a watch. We discover that he's Agent S and that his master is Major Megaburns. So Major Sideburns is trademarked, I see. So we see Major Megaburns, who is on a film spinner as Professor Von Doofenshmirtz is causing trouble again in doing something evil as we get sliding film tracks showing Karl trying out a steam-powered jetpack. Now if you watched Bullethead Baloo before, you know that this would be the JETPACK OF STUPIDITY as I discover that the device is called a zoetrope. Okay; good to know. Megaburns is gravely offended by some belief that Karl's zoetrope image is cooler. Karl claims that it has more frames, so yeah; Karl thinks he's PlayStation 4 and Megaburns is Weak U. Sweary closes the zoetrope and honks. Scene change to a steampunk lab which is basically the same type of hideout used by Doctor Axelotte from Bullethead Baloo. It's now known as Doofenshmirtz Evil Amalgamated; performed by a barber quartet. Of course! Sweary climbs in through the roof as we cut to the lab as Doofen has an absurd top hat on with purple coat and pants. So, not much different from the 2013 version of the same guy. Oh wait; he has a porn mustache, my mistake. He has a giant gear and belt machine on full power as he turns around to face Sweary right away. Doofen talks in a contrived matter and...oh wait; turn off the machine...and he talks normally. HAHA! Doofen isn't even trying here as Sweary tries to bite him; but no dice. Doofen counters with a steam powered train with a conductor robot that looks like Norm. Now known as Pneumatic Pnorman. P's silent, because P means pee and that's bad in 1903. Except when it's not. Pnorm wants to put the cuecumber in the salad after Doofen babbles on like me, and Doofen blows him off; apologizing to Sweary for Pnorm's failure in identifying objects. Doofen wants to do the old "tie victim to the train tracks" gimmick as Pnorm calls it melodramatic and Sweary honks. Geez; Agent P was much less annoying when he talked.
Doofen asks if Sweary preen his feathers with his mouth. TMI, Doofen! T-M-I! Doofen almost swears and then gets the name as we cut back to Phineas and Ferb shoveling coal into a furance as they have created a steampunkish version of a modern farming plower and irgation device. So basically; this shucks the corn, milks the cows, plows the fields, etc. etc and etc. Of course, we cannot show them milking udders because BS&P cannot get therapy on their obssession for penises. Machine gun seeding ensues, mending fences is done and a lot of plowing is done. I betcha Candace comes in and proclaims that they are so busted. I check the DVD...Here comes Candance with the buckets complaining about not meeting Jeremy and here comes the steam all in one chore destroyer! Damn; I'm so good as Candace follows them and calls them steam punks. HAHA! I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Candace dumps the buckets and bails to find Linda as Phineas tells us that this won't stop until it runs out of coal. Kids not getting accuracy? What a shocker? Cut to the railroad tracks as Doofenly Whiplash has Sweary Doo-Right tied to the train tracks...badly...PNorm looks like a complete tool here as Doofen has a invention under the cover. Guess what it's called? Just guess. Doofen shows off the commemorative coin from the beginning of the episode and Sweary bites Doofen's hand and the coin goes flying, and probably gets buried too. Pnorm basically states that it's probably at Doofen's feet (the coin) and if he looks for it, Pnorm's axles will go out of alignment. Ummm; I think you are already there, sir. So, back to the invention thingy as Doofen claims that he doesn't mind progress, but since he's evil, he hates the cheer that comes from "progress" (scare quotes his, not mine). He's Mike Adams, only a steam punk. So Doofen wants to destroy the World's Fair with a giant white swan machine, which is a lot more symbolic than the writers and Doofen had intended. I'll call it the Swan-inator. Plus; it's a hammering machine too.
Pnorm returns with Doofen's daughter and implies that he tried to stuff her in the gumball machine. So yeah; it's the hate side of the love-hate relationship now. At least Doofen blows Pnorm off for being stupid as he gets on the machine. So Doofen of course is clearly swearing because the loud train whistle blows and you cannot hear anything he said, other than aerosol cheese. Pnorm calls him out on it; so Doofen swears some more with loud train sounds blocking it, probably even more graphic language than previously as we head inside the 1903 kitchen as Linda is making butter with a butter churner. Candace runs in and claims that the boys are being unfair in doing their chores and creating a machine. Linda thinks this is exciting, so even in 1903, Candace cannot buy a break. Why does she even bother at this point? Linda was complaining about how complex the gadgets are despite doing the up and down motion, repeat, repeat, repeat. She also tells Candace to wait; which means that Candace is already screwed and should just quit right now, because that job will take hours. Head to the world fair as we head to the front of the house of the future, ironically, the only thing that is believable at this point. We see the farmer and the farmer's wife arguing over a teddy bear with glasses and a cowboy hat. The farmer of course blows her off for being a bigot of the furry fandom, and then the house of the future gets destroyed by the Swan-inator as the denizens all bail from the scenes, including a steam punk version of Vivian as Doofen cheers and swears like a sailor, and yes the train whistle covers what he said. A bunch of denizens blow him off next to a wooden chair because they cannot hear him. And we accuse furry fans of indecency? Cut back to the train tracks with Sweary honking as a train is coming towards him as his hat doubles as a tiny double mech saw that cuts through rope. Umm; yeah. So Sweary pushes up; flips his hat and grabs the back of the train, that is that. Head back to the world fair as the tent for Real Motion Pictures from Gulliere Brothers gets destroyed by the Swan-inator as everyone bails.
Two dudes are filming a man and a woman as they notice the swan and want to record the event. The brown trenchcoat wearing man is Auguste by the way as the black trenchcoat wearing man declares him the inventor of the moving picture documentary. So the black trenchcoat wearing man calls for ragtime music and we get it with a guy playing the piano while the picture is being filmed by the two dudes. So we get some really silly 1903 footage of the Swan-inator complete with built in dialogue captions; which I'm pretty sure that is not how it works in real life. And they do the "Doofen swears and is covered up by a loud whistle" spot; which makes no sense since the film is already silent. In flies Sweary biting on Doofen porno mustache which is completely ripped off as Sweary falls on the ground and honks. Corn jokes ensue and then we cut back to the steampunk chore destroyer as a man in overalls with a grass stick in his mouth has a horse and buggy filled to the brim with corn and fresh milk. He asks if they are a bit young to be industrial revolutionaries and Phineas gleefully retorts that one for me. Farmer don't care because it's good enough for him even if he's from a bygone era. That was great as the horse's name is Spartacus. Funny how the horse has a name; but not the farmer. So the farmer and Spartacus leave as it's the bookcase for him. Don't ask me what that is; I don't speak 1903. Phineas jumps off and asks what they should do now since the chores are done and Baljeet wants lemonade, Buford wants to dig a canal in Panama and Isabella wants to court Phineas because inform consent sucks in 1903...Phineas questions this and Isabella says nothing.
So Sweary appears and climbs on the tractor and drives it towards the wooden fence, breaking a piece of it down and somehow a piece of it flies up as soon as the tractor passes through. Logic? What logic? In comes Linda being pushed by Candace and she says but, since it's 1903 Linda blows her off for using it. HA! Back to the camera as the denizens bail and the camera gets shoved down the swan's throat by Doofen, and in comes Sweary with the Chore Destroyer and we have a wickedly whacky cartoon fight with the giant steam engines of death. It was great as Swearly fires corn down the Swan-inator's throat, jumps off the machine and walks straight into the hard camera as both machines explodes twice during the Team Rocket exit. HAHA! Sweary is cursed and that is that as we return to reality (no, not really) as Lawerence ends his story and Phineas calls it far-fetched for the time period, in which Lawerence claims that it was. Then out of nowhere, Professor Von Doofenshmirtz who is sporting a SWANK beard and mustache lands on the ground where the coin is. He cannot believe that he was up there so long. It was so long, time slowed down and he's really 65 years old despite supposing to be at least 130 years old. That ends the episode at 10:20 approx. I like this episode a lot, despite being the usual mess and Doofen 1903 is still as dumb as Doofen 2013. Go figure. *** 1/2 (70%).
It's No Picnic: We begin with the exact same shot as the beginning of the last short only we hear Phineas wanting to build a mega-mondo...something. Cut to the backyard with Phineas, Ferb, Baljeet, Buford and Isabella as Burford no sells because it's family day and his family is visiting. Buford leaves as Phineas isn't too upset because there is always workarounds, but Baljeet no sells now because he's taking an East Indian cooking class. It's goat vindaloo and a goat bleets and Baljeet bails stage right. Ooookkkkkaaaayyyyy. So; Phineas is cool because it's down to three, but Linda spirited Ferb away because he has a dental appointment. Didn't see that one coming. So Phineas is fine with just two and Isabella is squeeling like mad. Yes; they are going to tease the kiss that never actually happens. Isabella winds up and backhands herself in a really salty shot and is fine now. HA! So Phineas is trying to come up with a strategy, but is cut off. He admits that this is hard without Ferb as Isabella claims that Ferb doesn't speak a lot. Phineas' end-around response makes no sense at all as Isabella suggests the Fireside Girl Manual, thus making the troupe look like a high-end version of the Junior Woodchucks. Isabella bails for inspiration as Phineas sits underneath the tree and calls Perry's disappearance normal. You don't say? Scene change to the kitchen counter with the Smile Cereal as Perry appears. Perry jumps into the cereal box with hat on and splashes into OWCA headquarters. Major Monogram is on the monitor as Perry sits in front of the computer. Monogram makes breakfast jokes about the entrance, don't care. So we are shown video of Doofen raiding dollar store bins and calls it pathetic, and that's enough to check on him, because it might be evil. Sigh; nothing changes, although OWCA does allow some sympathy for him as he tells Perry to basically buy Doofen a cup of coffee. Sadly; it's not a clue, but I don't think Doofen would take to that. Perry bails as we head to a log cabin firewood shop. I then discover that this is where the Fireside Girls have their meeting as the phone is under glass, and ringing. Gretchen answers the phone as we have a Code Pink: Romeo is alone!
I think we know where this is going. Gretchen tells Isabella not to panic and that they are on the way. Literally one second later, Gretchen is already in the backyard of Isabella's home and we jump cut scene change to a pump tent being pumped up in the backyard by Holly, which is basically a inflatable log cabin. Everyone enters as Holly pulls a white cord and that inflates a spurce tree. Jump cut to Candace on the sidewalk talking on her cellphone to Staci near Isabella's residence as they exchange notes that Phineas and Ferb are split up and thus Phineas can never do anything that requires her to bust them. Then Candace catches herself and notices the Fireside Girls Mobile Tactical Unit. This causes her to hang up and run into the log cabin demanding answers to this outrage. Isabella claims that they are playing "war games" antics as Ginger is on the phone while Katie and Milly are playing war chess with the boys as pieces on said board. The plan is basically to get close to Phineas because Isabella has a crush on him, which is something everyone knew since the first episode. Ginger questions the amount of crush in that crush and Isabella blows her off. Candace gets the crush; but not the Phineas crush because his head is a triangle. As opposed to Arnold and his football head? Why should that matter? Love knows no shapes, you moron! Isabella calls it so acute. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Candace decides to actually not bust Phineas and keep Linda busy; seeing this as an easy task. Head to Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated as the doorbell is now the jingle. Head into the hallway with Perry and a cup of coffee at the door as Doofen opens it and he looks like this is not one of his better days, if you catch my drift. Doofen lets him in and actually thanks him for not vandalizing his apartment room this time. Doofen also states that money is tight and cannot rub two nickels together. Like that has stopped him before. Oh; and yes, Perry gave him the coffee and didn't splash it in his face, so you know this is pathetic. Oh; and Perry stupidly steps into a quick-glue paper like a goddamned idiot. It's hardening cream actually; but still silly.
Doofen proclaims that Charlene is out of the country...AGAIN; because she likes eco-cultural explorations to the extreme, man! Doofen has no idea what that is; other than being very expensive as we superimpose an image of Charlene in a red half shirt, shorts, red socks and boots; riding on a pulley wheel while money flies out of her pocket. That had to be photoshopped; no one can be this stupid with their money. If that was Donald Trump, I would have trouble believing that it was photoshopped even when it was photoshopped. Brain circuits short circuiting....Okay; I'm back. She then is kayaking and wearing a dollar bill grass skirt and mingling with the neighbour, while these are all selfies she's text messaging to Doofen, just to rub it in. I discover that Doofen has a vibration function and he blows it off. See; this proves how old I am, when I don't have a cell phone at all. Doofen spend the alimony payment (I don't believe that he has that money for a second) for the month on another laser gun and cannot send Vanessa to the Grievance Movie Marathon she wants to see. Sounds like a code phrase for "Divorce Court". Apparently; there is a movie about an Italian Jug Band getting revenge. Why? I don't know and I don't really care. We discover that it's called a Teleport-inator, making Doofen look like a goddamn idiot, so that makes two of them now. Hee hee! Cue drum music that Doofen blows it off because he's a hypocrite since he literally hired a drum band. Hmmm; maybe you shouldn't have spend the alimony payment on them, if you didn't want them now. Apparently; spending money effectively is not one of Doofen's strong point. Basically; his evil plan was to send Roger and his cabinet to Drusselstein, so he could take over as mayor, while Roger burns in the ovens. Or not. Perry is not amused and counts down to three before pointing at the Teleport-inator as Doofen decides to add another setting and take Vanessa to the movie theater. Of course.
By the way; the settings include: Inside A Goat, My Pants, Mars, Turkish Prison, Home (Drusselstein, I guess), Random (because all new games have this feature now), Two Lairs and two streets away. I betcha that last one is the movie theater, just to screw with our minds. So Doofen cheers for victory and drinks up; before spitting it out, complaining that Perry got him Decaf. Oh; that is so low, Perry. So low. Cut back to the Fireside Girls' inflatable log cabin as we head inside to Gretchen and Ginger at the computer and microphone starting Operation Perfect Picnic. Jump cut to Isabella with the manual at the gate of Phineas' backyard. Isabella enters the backyard and sits down with Phineas at the tree. Candace is sitting on a love seat near the window door where Isabella and Phineas are shown at said tree. Phase two has begun and no one cares. Neither does Candace as she kisses this goodbye and leaves. Cut back to the tree as Isabella sits down and opens the book. She then claims that she's hungry as Phineas suggests a picnic and Isabella declares this a great idea. Of course; somehow a picnic basket teleports into the scene. Of course! Gretchen calls her good and I agree because she packed some Mexican-Jewish delicacies such as a Gefilte-flan that wobbles. Basically; a pudding with a Gefilte Fish on top. According to Wikipedia: Gefilte fish is a dish made from a poached mixture of ground deboned fish, such as carp, whitefish, or pike. It is a dish traditionally served as an appetizer by Ashkenazi Jewish households. They all go "eww" and then laugh it off anyway. Phineas calls this absurd and then suddenly, Irving shows up from the wooden fence, for no reason. I don't get this as Holly is in the log cabin on the computer radar calling a Code Irving and that requires the strike team. Irving cannot even get a word in before he dragged off-screen by the Fireside Girls. Pfft; whatever. I'm sorry; but I don't know enough about this show to understand why Irving would even want to crash a picnic with Isabella and Phineas.
Anyhow; some more food gets shown as we head into the log cabin with Ginger, Holly, Milly and Adyson (about time she showed up) carrying Irving stuffed in a canvas bag. Ginger salutes Gretchen as the mission is done and Irving is all tied up now. Irving acts like Val Venis and sucks at it so much, the Fireside Girls look like they want to emasculate him and I don't care if they do. Jump cut to Doofen on the Teleport-inator making adjustment with the wires. I do not have any faith of this poor guy making this work, I really don't. He simply ties the wires like tying shoelaces just to prove my point before closing up the panel on the laser weapon. Doofen climbs down as the drum band continues to annoy him; so Doofen tells them to take the day off. The band bails to go see a movie, completely rendering the entire invention pointless. So Doofen asks Vanessa, Miss Pumpkin Pants, to come in. If that doesn't put Doofen on the "hate" of the love-hate relationship of these two, nothing will now. Vanessa calls this no big deal; so Doofen zaps her into a movie theater. Oh my god, it worked...Oh wait; it's a Ducky Momo movie with little kids. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Doofen is the 2013 version of Jack W. Tweeg now. He's on the hate part now. And wouldn't you know it, Candace is about five seats away from Vanessa singing the Ducky Momo song. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Cut back to Doofen cheering victory about being Super Dad...BWHAHAHAHAHA! (Doofenshmirtz: Ow, come on now!) and it's time to teleport Roger to a Nazi country of doom as Perry bounces the cream paper over; grabs the cup of coffee and pours it on the cream to free himself. Perry kicks Doofen in the face as the twist knob gets twisted and the laser beam fires on a pedstal of flowers which teleports to an art gallery right in front of a painting of red blood and a few shapes, which two people looking at it don't get until the flower pot obscures it. Pfft; whatever. Jump cut back to Doofen as the laser is firing on everything despite nothing being teleported, thus killing the gimmick right out of the starting gate. This plan is an epic fail in logic!
We head back to Holly at the computer mainframe spying on Phineas and Isabella during their picnic as they enjoy themselves. Jump cut to Doofenshmirtz's Evil Inc. as a green laser beam causes a cut to inside the dentist office as Ferb is zapped and teleported out just before the dentist turns around. The dentist accuses Ferb of being a runner and we cut to Isabella teasing kissing Phineas, but stops because Ferb appears out of nowhere causing Phineas to say hello to him. Isabella claims that it really is how he doesn't say it and we are back to three now to restart the project. Isabella isn't thrilled; but goes along with it anyway. I betcha Baljeet and Burford will be teleported out of their stuff as well. Anyhow; Isabella tells the FSG to abort mission because it's overblown picnic now as she consoles Ferb while Ferb cannot talk because his mouth is numb. Phineas brings out the blueprints as they are going to have an awesome picnic in the park. All right. Cut back to Doofen and Perry having their goofy fight which includes random teleportation and punching Doofen's punchable face. Blinding spot ensues as we cut to outside the Ducky Momo Festival Theater with Candace and Vanessa exchanging pleasure thoughts. Vanessa seems to enjoy Ducky Momo in the same way I enjoy Peppa Pig, I see. Candace claims that Doofen was raised by wild ocelots. Somehow; I believe this story. Vanessa claims that this isn't the weirdest thing about her family while saying OMG. That annoys me because what does OMG mean? I swear that internet geeks make up these stupid things just to annoy people. At least Emojis have an on-point level of communication. And to make this more inexcusable: You can say "Oh my god" on a Disney show, it's okay. Candace is in awe because there is a giant amusement park in Danville park complete with rides that look like giant bees, ketchup and mustard bottles, burger rides and soda containers. Vanessa leaves singing as Candace basically says screw you to Phineas on the romance thing and he's so busted now. Candace simply walks into the park as we invokes the TEDDY RUXPIN SONG OF DOOM sang by Candace.
By the way; the roller coaster rides is made of picnic baskets. It's your typical musical sequence filled with lots of singing, picnic words checkerboarding and a 360 rotation camera spot. Phineas, Ferb, Isabella, Suzy and someone else are in the Waffle train as there is lots of clapping and the general public doesn't care at all. Lots of picnic food motifs with Isabella and Phineas in the picnic basket lift; and of course the kiss doesn't come aas the FSG join in on the rollercoaster. The song ends with Candace relishing this and goes to her cellphone to call Linda who is driving the car and proclaiming that she is going to pick up Ferb from the dentist. Now; you would think that Linda would be mad at Ferb when she doesn't see her at the dentist office. Candace informs her that Ferb isn't at the office and Linda claims that he must have gotten out early and decides to drive to the park after all. Yeah; so they got out of this logic break, by having Linda claim that Ferb's appointment was over early. All right. Jump cut to Baljeet making vindaloo in the park with the goat and I'm guessing his family behind a Indian-motif palace model in the background. Oh wait; they are already at the park as Baljeet and Buford are competing to show off their food wares. Buford's dish is called bitterballen. Ooookkkaaaayyy, that looks like pork and beans to me. They run and have a meeting of the minds. And it wasn't at the cultural apporoation club. We do the promo from All's Whale That Ends Whale only it's with bitterballen and vindaloo as Baljeet wants to try it out; but Buford wants to kill this with fire. Never mind that cooking it makes it taste better, so Buford is out to lunch. Back to the fight as apparently; Doofen gets whacked into the laser again as more blind spots ensue. Laser beam bounces off mirror and zaps the laser gun, Doofen and Perry. They get teleported into Danville Park as Doofen smells his favorite food; which is the same as Buford. Perry pushes the out of nowhere self-destruction button, switches the knob to something, shoots the laser at Doofen and the amusement park and it all gets teleported out of the park. Candance drags Linda towards the park entrance and in the background is Phineas and Isabella having a small adorable picnic as Phineas wonders where it all went. Good thing they had the original backup plan with them as Isabella squeals and then slaps herself. Yeah. Candace stammers like a stupid idiot as Linda drags Candace out of the park and we fade to black and return with the crowd chanting for Ducky Momo as Candace and Vanessa form a rock band and sing the Ducky Momo song. AWESOME! I cannot do this justice and that ends the episode at 11:00 approx. Candace and Vanessa have their way out of this stupid life now and this was an easy **** 1/4 (85%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Okay; this was a pretty good set of shorts. Steampunx had a really awesome musical introduction to steampunk and the ending was a cute twist; but it was the usual Phineas & Ferb love in otherwise. Bascially a typical episode set in 1903. At least Darkwing Duck was more creative, even though they made a mess most of the time. It's No Picnic was slow at first; but really picked up once Vanessa got teleported and it turned into a really funny amusement park food ride that ended with a great Ducky Momo Rock Band moment with Candace and Vanessa. It was great and once again, Isabella is denied her overdue kiss...AGAIN! So overall; a really good selection this time. Next up is the final two shorts of the Star Wars DVD set: Doof 101 and Father's Day. So yes; I'm banging through the holidays in one go around. So...
Thumbs in the middle for Steampunx, thumbs up for It's No Picnic and I'll see you all next time.