Return to 50 Webs
Disclaimer#1: All images, characters and material is (C) 1990/1991 Walt Disney Company and is being used without permission. The webmaster has made sure that no money was made in the creation of this web page and that all material used here is used with the up most affection and respect to the Walt Disney Company and the Tale Spin Team.
Disclaimer#2: The views expressed here are solely the views of the webmaster and no one else. The webmaster has no intentions to change anyone's minds about a particular subject and respects the views of the viewers. Comments about this and other editorial can be E-Mail at gweagle@eastlink.ca or signing the Cloudkicker guest book.
Sports Goofy In Soccermania
Reviewed: 06/17/2011
Soccer and Goofy?! The Ducktales Characters are here?! And Why Is This Like The Will Ryan Show?!
Welcome to the latest installment of the Father's Day Specials. Now that most of the 1980's DTVA stuff is out of the way (The New Adventures of Winnie The Pooh is the only show I haven't done yet); I can focus on this little special as this is me first official rant featuring Goofy. And he's playing soccer now. In the Ducktales world. Okay; not quite. Sports Goofy In Soccermania is a short 20 minute special that aired in May of 1987 just months before Ducktales officially aired. Think of this as Ducktales and Goof Troop crossing over before both shows even existed and you will get the picture. Basically; it's a redo plot of sorts from Klutz On The Clutch if you can believe that: Scrooge has a "worthless" trophy and needs to get it back from the nephews after discovering that it's worth a million dollars. So he donates his money to create a soccer squad for the nephews who take on the Beagle Boys who want to steal the trophy. So Scrooge hires a head coach who just happens to be one of the best sports guys ever. I'll leave that as a surprise for now. To be honest; I have never seen this special; although I do know that this is likely Tad Stones' DTVA debut (I believe he appeared in two Disney productions before this) and it would prove to be Russi Taylor's debut as well. So how does this show hold up. Let's rant on shall we...?!
This special is written by Tad Stones, Michael Giaimo and Joe Ranft. The direction is done by Matthew O'Callaghan and the uncredited Darrell Van Citters. Michael Giaimo has done mostly Disney production in the 1980's and 1990's starting with the short Fun With Mr. Future (Tad also appeared here). He also did animation for The Black Cauldron, Pocahontas, Home On The Range, & The Brave Little Toaster. This is his only DTVA appearance. His non Disney credit include FernGully: The Last Rainforest, Christmas Is Here Again (his most recent credit), and HiHi Puffy AmiYumi. He was also Bob Gracia in the short Doctor Of Doom. The late Joe Ranft (passed away in 2005) started off the same way; but also did puppets for the television movie Hansel & Gretel in 1982. He also did title design for Drop Dead Fred (!!) and worked on Disney movies such as Oliver & Company, The Little Mermaid, The Rescuers Down Under, Beauty & The Beast, both Brave Little Toaster sequels (Memo to Disneytoon movie haters: They did sequels long before this), Fantasia 2000, James & The Giant Peach, Nightmare Before Christmas and the Lion King. He also worked with PIXAR on Toy Story, A Bug's Life, Cars, Monsters Inc., Finding Nemo and The Incredibles. This special is his only DTVA appearance. Cars is his final credits. He has 15 acting credits, 12 writing credits, 8 art credits, 8 other credits, 2 animation credit, 1 director credit, 1 producer credit (Corpse Bride) and five self credits. Matthew started with Mickey's Christmas Carol in 1983 and then did Life With Louie, The Pagemaster movie, Rover Dangerfield, The Little Mermaid, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, The Great Mouse Detective, Open Season 2, Curious George, Shrek, Family Guy, Cats Don't Dance and Snow Dogs. This is his only DTVA appearance. His most recent credit is Daffy's Rhapsody this year. He has 8 animation credits, five writing credits, 12 director credits, 7 art credits, 2 producer credits, 4 other credits and four visual effects credits to his resume. Darrel's resume is the weirdest of them all: Doctor Doom as an actor in 1979; and then it's the same short Fun With Mr. Future. Then he does The Fox & The Hound, Teen Wolf, The Berenstain Bears, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventures, Tomcats, The Mr. Men Show and Movie, and the Gargoyles video games. Yeah sure. This is his DTVA debut. Noah Comprende is his most recent credit and Chop Kick Panda as well. He has 13 animation credits, four producer credits, 11 director credits, three writing credits and three other credits to his resume. Whew! Still a better ratio than Fluppy Dogs that is for sure. I have no idea what animation studio did the animation here; but I'm going to hazard a guess that it might be the studio Chris Barat believed was going to do the Ducktales show before they ultimately decided on TMS. Either that or it was done by Disney's feature department which only serves to note how dumb a lot of critics were towards DTVA in general.
Opening Moment #1: The first ten second is a simple title card for the special against a black background. That's called not screwing around and sometimes that is a good thing.
We begin this one in Duckberg with the golden gate bridge and the Moneybin in the background. You can clearly tell this was in production long before Ducktales because the Moneybin is a lot more edgier than the soft rounded Moneybin we knew in Ducktales. The reflection water effects are awesome as we get a blue "Duckberg" on the lower right. We zoom in as the blue birds fly and we head to the guarded Money Bin guarded by furry police dogs with guns (despite barely seeing them) as we get the promo on one of the stones. He's Scrooge McDuck and is the richest duck in the world. And he is darn well going to stay that way. So we head into the vault which is more sharper than the Ducktales bin as Scrooge rattles coins and likes money. He rises up and manages to sit down all in one motion as he is hugging that MONEY, MONEY, YEAH, YEAH like a human being. He also looks very different than the Scrooge in Ducktales as he is wearing a purple coat instead of the usual navy blue one. Kind of like that deal with Kit's blanket in Plunder and Lightning actually. By the way; it's been four years since Alan Young did Scrooge in Mickey's Christmas Carol and in a strange move Alan wasn't voicing Scrooge here. In fact; he doesn't appear in this special at all. This Scrooge is voiced by Will Ryan and as you will see this isn't the last time we will hear of him. So Scrooge flops on the ground throwing the money into the air as we cut to the door vault and see the nephews before Ducktales and in this one I cannot tell them apart because they are wearing the same red outfits. I believe that this is Russi Taylor's debut as the nephews too. They pop from the door and Scrooge notices them and goes to the OUT OF NOWHERE cannon and points it at the nephews and tries to light it before the nephews yell at him that it's just the nephews and not some Beagle Boy invasion. Yes; this Scrooge is so paranoid that he would think that his nephews are evil. Sadly; the Quack Pack nephews don't exist for another nine years or so. That would be a perfect spot to pull on them; but Toby Shelton is a... you know. Toby actually did assistant animation at this point (and is one of only four people in this project to work on TaleSpin in some shape and form) by the way.
Scrooge finally realizes that it's just a bunch of kids he knows and flicks the match out as he is about to dive asking the nephews what they want from him. The nephews bring out the out of nowhere soccer ball as they are asking for help for the sports program (The DVD captions are clearly written by the British arm of Disney since they spell it as programme. Sadly; Open Office does not see it as a word even though it actually is a real word.) as Scrooge swims in the money. Scrooge agrees to support it because it's a capital idea (as he means it'll make him money) and the nephews inform him that it will not cost him much. Scrooge spits out the money and gets all confused. So the nephews show him a book as he only has to buy them a trophy (and the trophy looks okay in the book) for only $1.49. That is one cheap trophy even in 1987 and Scrooge is even more frugal than Nintendo is and blows it off in his usual dramatic fashion. Ah; some things never change with Scroogie. Scrooge goldbricks like a cheap rich man as the nephews invoke the Gruffi poses and look pissed for some reason. Look; I realize Will Ryan loves Carl Barks' work; but that doesn't mean that he is good enough to voice Scrooge; most so on the heels of Mickey's Christmas Carol. Alan's Scottish accent would work wonders here. See; Scrooge thought he only have to give moral support (unless it involves chasing Donald of course). So Scrooge dives into the gold coins proclaiming that he had a trophy once and finds his first nickel in the process before returning with an old dusty small trophy and gives it to the nephews. The nephews are not pleased of this happening; but Scrooge ignores it like Nintendo ignores the stupidity of Mr. Hardcore.
So we somehow jump cut to outside the streets as the nephews have the trophy and calls Scrooge a miser. They call the trophy a piece of junk and not even worth ten cents. Then a brown dog with a brown mustache and brown suit and pants shows up and blocks the nephews because he overheard them and uses the magnifying glass to look at the trophy and thinks it's wonderful. See; he is the curator of the Duckberg Museum of Antiquities. The trophy is actually an ancient urn which dates back to Presamarian cultures of the Heeby-Jeeby Valley. Oh yeah; the Jymn Magon Pun Police strikes again! Do they have any idea how much this is worth? Well; we get the zoom out newspaper against a blue background which is known as the Duckberg Daily and that the trophy is worth one million dollars. So let's get the additional voices out of the way right now: Additional voices are done by Phil Proctor and according to Wikipedia (DANGER! DANGER!): Of the four members of Firesign Theatre, Proctor has had the greatest amount of mainstream exposure as an actor, having appeared occasionally on television in small roles, including episodes of All in the Family and Night Court, and Off Broadway in the 1964 musical The Amorous Flea. He also provided the voices of Meltdown in Treasure Planet and "Drunk Monkey" in the Dr. Dolittle remake series. He has also provided uncredited ADR overdubs for numerous movies over the years. More recently, he has done voices for several cartoons and video games, including the voice of Howard Deville in Rugrats and All Grown Up! on Nickelodeon, "background" voices for Disney features, and voice work on Power Rangers Time Force. He also did two voices in the GameCube video game Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem, and on PlayStation 2's Dark Chronicle. He is the voice of The Professor and White Monkey in the Ape Escape series. Recently, his voice was featured in the video game Dead Rising as Russell Barnaby, Assassin's Creed as Dr. Warren Vidic, and on Adventures in Odyssey as Leonard Maltsner. In the 2007 live audio production of the Angie Award-winning screenplay Albatross (original screenplay written by Lance Rucker and Timothy Perrin) at the International Mystery Writers Festival, he played seven characters requiring four different accents: KGB agent Stefan Linnik, East German Communist Party apparatchik Kurt Mueller; a West Berlin gasthaus owner; an armed forces radio announcer; the Senate minority whip; a Secret Service guard; and Gerhard Derstman, the East German Cultural Attache/Stasi member. He also lent his voice to the game Battlezone. He was the announcer on Big Brother in seasons 3 through 6. Proctor also lended his voice in the Marvel: Ultimate Alliance series as the voices of Edwin Jarvis and Baron Mordo in the first game, and The Tinkerer in the sequel, Marvel: Ultimate Alliance 2. He started as Bobo in Run For Your Life in 1968. This is his DTVA debut and he also appeared in Recess. Assassin's Creed 3 is his most recent appearance. He has 205 acting credits, 17 ADR credits, eight writing credits, three special effects credits, 2 producer credits, five self credits and four other credits to his resume. The other additional voices are done by Jack Angel.
So we head to Scrooge's bedroom as Scrooge is awaken by a Jeeves butler who actually is like Duckworth only with young black hair and a black suit. He almost sounds like Chuck McCann actually; but is likely voiced by Jack Angel or Phil Procter. Doesn't matter at this point as he gives Scrooge a newspaper on a platter (nice) as I just realized that Scrooge's headboard in the background reads: E Plurbius Unum. That is actually the official motto of the USA and not "In God We Trust" like some whiny politician got on America's money. When even Scrooge F'N McDuck is more secular than you; then you know capitalism has gone awry. Duckworth (not named as such; but the accent makes him so) walks away as Scrooge reads the headlines and Scrooge gets through the wooden ceiling with the Scooby Doo Angel Spot. Sadly; if anyone has watched the Disney shorts; they do the Hanna Barbera spot as well. It's just that HB used it so much everyone got sick of it and didn't want to be reminded of the spot because HB overused it. Young Duckworth asks if that will be all as we head to Gyro's lab as Gyro Gearloose who looks mighty similar to Gyro in Ducktales (only with a different color scheme which is more green and more black) only he's not voiced by Hal Smith; even though Hal Smith was in Mickey's Christmas Carol. He's also voiced by Will Ryan. And Light Bulb also makes an appearance. We get an old lady reading the newspaper and then to the streets as another brown dog who clearly looks almost like the curator with another dog are reading the newspaper as they hope someone has taken the precautions seriously because here comes the Beagle Boys as the dogs run stage right as the newspaper drops to the ground. Beagle Boy #1 picks it up as we discover that these Beagle Boys are exactly the same with no personalities, wearing the red sweater with black masks and white caps. They also have no prison numbers either and are not voiced by Chuck McCann or Frank Welker. They are voiced by...say it with me...Will Ryan. All of them actually. They read the paper and there are dollar signs in their eyes...
...and we head to Scrooge's mansion as a white limo pulls into the driveway and the nephews all race to the love seat and tells Scrooge to come in with a sarcastic tone in their voices. Scrooge walks in with the biggest trophy I have ever seen in my life. It's about 10 times Hoppo's weight for goodness sakes. POW! OUCH! Ummmm... The nephews agree to the terms; if the trophy is the second place trophy. HAHA! Scrooge gets into the nephews face and accuses him of taking advantage of him. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Projection much there Scrooge. And the nephews call him out on it too. Double bonus! See; the only way Scrooge is going to win that trophy back is to be the sponsor of the winning team. Scrooge asks which one and the nephews whistle and twirl the soccer ball. Child blackmail; I love it. See Kit Cloudkicker; he's even better than those two. So we scene change to the sports store as Scrooge accuses them of fleecing him and the nephews blow him off because they only need a new soccer ball. Scrooge steals the soccer ball they have and asks what is wrong with that soccer ball; it looks fine to him. Sadly; he clearly doesn't know the difference between soccer and basketball as he dribbles it so hard it pops. HAHA! Stick to ownership Scroogie; your dribbling skills murder balls (NOT THOSE ONES!). Nephew #1 does the Gruffi pose forcing Scrooge to recoil and go to the customer desk and ringing the bell harshly wanting service. So we head to the stock room and notice a familiar voice calling them to wait and out comes...Goofy? That's right folks; this is Goofy's DTVA debut before he became a goof ball father in Goof Troop. Here's another example of a voice that was not voiced by the typecast voice despite the typecast voice being around. Goofy is usually voiced by Bill Farmer and was Goofy in DTV Doggone Valentine about four months before this special aired. However; he's not doing the voice of this Goofy nor the Goofy in Who Framed Roger Rabbit for that matter. This one is voiced by the late Tony Pope who was doing the Teddy Ruxpin storybook tapes at around this time (sadly; due to the fact that the Adventures of Teddy Ruxpin television show was done in Canada; only Will Ryan (who voiced Grubby I do believe in both storybook and both television versions) was affordable by the creators as the rest of the voices were done by Canadian voice acting experts and child actors.).
Sadly; Goofy is still Goofy though as he slips on a skate (which really wasn't his fault) and skids like a good goofball should. And no; I'm not going to get into the debate about Goofy and Pluto (Bill Farmer does Pluto's voice too by the way) either because it's the stupidest debate in the history of animation and it was explained in The TaleSpin Source Page on Animal Vs. Anthros case study. If I hear about how wrong it is to have a real dog and a half man/half dog in the same universe; I'm going to scream. He manages to somehow get a bucket in his hand and catches the balls with ease. Scrooge blows him off as incompetent as Goofy thinks he wouldn't drop anything and then a soccer ball bounces weakly off his head. HEE HEE! The ball bounces in front of the nephews as the nephews will take this one. Goofy is glad for the service as he does some cleaning and looking awesome while doing it. Oh; now I see why this Goofy is not voiced by Bill Farmer. Yes; the writers decided to make him not nearly as accident prone as the original Goofy. And once in a while; this is a great thing. So Scrooge grabs the soccer ball and she see the ancient urn replacing Goofy and Goofy asks if he wants anything else and Scrooge grabs his arm and forces his stage left because there is something for him to do for Scroogie.
So we head to the soccer field (football if you are outside North America) as the babyfaces walk onto the field with Goofy as the nephews continue to make Scrooge's life miserable when they proclaim that the team the nephews assembled were the last ones pick. Scrooge is shocked and appalled in that order as we see various animals being lazy. HEE HEE! So Goofy greets them just to be Goofy; literally and figurally. So we have a seal, an elephant, a hippo, a goat, a kangaroo, an ostrich, and a cheetah. That makes ten players if you include the nephews so we are missing one player. Let me guess; it's Sports Goofy. Sport Goofy is the new head coach as he gets his redneck catchphrase. You know which one; it's "Hyuh!" in case you didn't notice. He asks how many of them played soccer before; and the animals don't even bother to answer. Sports Goofy is kind enough to show them how as he brings out the out of nowhere chalk board (Man; if this is done by Feature; then no wonder television animation is so improved.) and he explains the object of the game like a professional: Simple and to the point. I heart smart Goofy by the way; even more than accident prone Goofy. The animals are clueless and do nothing but do the wink sound effect. Yes; even Disney feature did this spot a lot, which just goes to show you that the old guard is both a bunch of old farts and it also shows how much of the old stuff was stolen for the new stuff that kids cheer for now! This is why you judge a show on it's merits; not on what generational plane the cartoon was in. It's a lot more fun this way and it makes it a lot harder for critics of the old and new generation to easily defeat you in an argument.
Goofy takes it as a good thing as Goofy brings the soccer ball out and ask who wants to go first. The soccer animals stand back like cowards; except for the kangaroo with shorts shaped like a pouch who is reading something I couldn't care about. So Goofy kicks the soccer ball and it lands in the pouch and the kangaroo finally sells shock as Scrooge is getting flustered. Goofy kicks more soccer balls as the team proceeds to sit, claw, horn and such. Goofy is loving this; Scrooge is clearly not loving this at all. The nephews headbutt each other trying to get the soccer ball and drop on their backs on the ground as Scrooge does the face palm. Goofy calls this all great. I agree; this is funny and the music is awesome; although this is not what Scrooge had in mind as great sadly. So Goofy wants to see how they play as a unit so Goofy rolls the ball into the middle of the field. The animals all run in and try to kick the ball with some of the most choppiest motion I have seen in a feature special animation from Disney as they managed to somewhat kick it and themselves into the soccer net and it comes off. HAHA! Goofy loves it of course. Scrooge's eyes look so sick that his child corrupting balloon of doom shows the trophy crumbling before him. HAHA!
So we head to the BAD PART OF TOWN (as per the black title on the top left) with sirens blazing and we head to the Beagle Boy slum house (it's clear that the Ducktales Beagle Boys had it better even in prison) as these white cap Beagle Boys (ironic that they are wearing the babyface color hats despite being clear heels) are huddled up watching television. We are watching a cooking show hosted by a female pig with brown curly hair wearing a blue bowtie and blue dress/apron. She is showing how to carefully do an egg without bruising it. The secret involves lemon extract which sadly will whiz by the kids heads even today and even in 1987. I didn't know about lemon extract for a long time until I heard about it used for making candies at home. I do recall vanilla extract and sometimes that extract can have alcohol in it. So the Beagle Boy leader turns off the television and the rest of the Beagle Boys protest this outrage. I don't blame them; you got to learn how to be more productive even if it means you have to steal ingredients just to be more productive. The leader blows them off because the twins are doing a job to get the million dollar trophy from Scrooge. Then a Beagle Boy (who is voiced by Tony Pope because his voice sounds like Goofy's) with a green bristle brush wants to steal it after the soccer tournament is over from under the nose. Beagle Boy leader likes the idea; but still stuffs the newspaper in his mouth like a big ass cigarette. He has a better idea see: Win the tournament and get the trophy nice and legal. Sadly; the Beagle Boys are clueless about playing soccer but it doesn't matter because they have a secret weapon. Riiiigggghhhtttt. Like it's going to be nice and legal. Let me translate that: CHEAT TO WIN! Yeah; what a shock? And yes; this special stole from the bad Klutz On The Clutch episode of the Wuzzles two or three years ago. This one will be better since Rhinokey is NOT involved in this one.
So we get a picture taken as we have the newspaper sequence again in the sports section as the Beagle Boys are entering the tournament. Which proves that there were no such things as criminal background checks in Duckberg nor in 1987 for sports teams. Then we get more spinning newspapers as Sports Goofy leads his animal team to it's first win somehow. Huh? How did Goofy manage to do that since the team is entirely useless. Funny; but useless. And yes; Goofy is the 11th man and the coach on the team. So we spin another newspaper and the Beagle Boys are winning as well. Note that they are booed and Sports Goofy is cheered. Another spinning newspaper and we discover that the animal soccer team is known as the Duckberg Greenbacks as the crowd pops for them again. You just knew that Scrooge would name the team after a slang term for money/dollar bills. So we continue this sequence as the Beagle Boys and Greenbacks make it all the way to the semi finals as we get the old wrestling classic "Raise the arms of the heels and they boo. Raise the arms of the babyfaces and they cheer. Rinse, lather repeat. Boo! Yay! Boo! Yay!". Watch the Wildcard Match on Thanksgiving 1995 at Survivor Series after the match when Shawn Michaels Ahmed Johnston, Jim Cornette and The British Bulldog do this spot after the match. It's hilarious because they were all on the same team. And you also have John Cena punching against any heel; only the babyface is booed and the heel is cheered.
So we get a Beagle Boy ripping a newspaper in disgust as he and two other Beagle Boys are gambling while one is smoking a cigar. Yes; another Disney product with smoking in it. Need I remind you that Disney was supposed to be editing out smoking scenes from their archives from now on. The boys blow off Sports Goofy and they decide to arrange a surprise party for him as we have a neat spot involving them stealing cards from each other as they laugh and drop their hands as all the cards are the ace of spades. They are going to lie, cheat and kidnap which is the difference between them and Los Gurreros (who just lie, cheat and steal.). So yes; their Krackpotkin plan is to kidnap Goofy as this ends the segment barely eight minutes in. Well; that was pretty good so far...
After the commercial break; we head to the practice soccer field as Scrooge watches on as the Greenbacks has vastly improved their soccer skills since the last time we saw them. It would have been better if there was a buildup to this where they have a scene where the animals turn the corner and become awesome instead of funny useless. Scrooge claps on the sidelines as Scrooge has the paper. He reads it and apparently; they are all in the finals already against the Beagle Boys. Jimmy The Beak (Oh lord; what a dreadful) has picked the Greenbacks as one million to one underdogs. Scrooge gasps in horror. I am too; because he's smoking a cigar; the second smoking scene in the episode already. You know; it's hard to blame anti-smoking advocates about screen time for smoking; because 90% of these smoking spots are absolutely useless and are just there to suck and blow so to speak. Sure; there are a few instances where the cigarette shows some use (see A Case of Mistaken Secret Identity) ; but most are there because the culture claims that smoking is natural. Which it is not. Eating is a different story which makes obesity that much harder to fight because one of the causes just so happens to be something people do naturally. He clutches his chest to have a heart attack; but here comes Goofy asking what is wrong. Scrooge explains that they are playing against the Beagle Boys and Goofy thinks nothing of it because they are still going to play fair. Scrooge pleads with him because the Beagle Boys don't play fair. They use false documents, prejure, and screw with minors. Never mind that Scrooge did the same thing with the nephews at the beginning of the episode. Projection much there Scroogie?! Goofy doesn't think they cheat because that is against DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!). HAHA! Scrooge faints dead away on cue. HAHA! (Kit: Now THIS makes up for the last two Fish Hooks episodes Gregory.) So Goofy still doesn't quite get it as he rubs one of the nephews head and tells them to get a good night sleep for the big game tomorrow.
So we segue to a mature lighted house as Goofy opens the door in shadow and walks in and gets kidnapped by the Beagle Boys . BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ah; some things never change. Here's the full blow by blow: Goofy turns on the lights, walks to the bathroom; changes into his night gown; brushes his teeth with a toothbrush from the medicine cabinet squeezed in by a Beagle Boy. There are Beagle Boys everywhere and Goofy is completely clueless as he gets into bed with a Beagle Boy and then catches himself and wants to turn out the lights. So the Beagle Boys encircle him with various international object offering to do it for him and the lights go out and the Beagle Boys completely MURDER him off screen. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So we head to Duckberg Memorial Stadium on the sky shot as the marching band is playing as we hear THE VOICE OF THE LOS ANGELES LAKERS (until 2002) cut his promo on the game as we see the fans buying stuff and stuffing into the stadium as the million dollar trophy is up for grabs and heavily guarded by about a dozen police dogs in uniforms, wearing sunglasses and enough guns to create a riot squad. So then we get a shot of a hallway leading to the locker room as the announcer is proclaiming that there is enthusiasium in the air. Sadly; we head into the Greenbacks' locker room and everyone inside is sulking. The Announcer is voiced by the late Chick Hearn (passed away in 2002) and according to the USIMDB: One of the most recognizable voices in Los Angeles, Francis Dayle Hearn, better known as "Chick" was the play-by-play voice of the Los Angeles Lakers for from 1960 to 2002. Known for his witty comments during the game and lightning-quick reactions to the play on the court, Hearn was as well-known a personality as some of the past Laker greats including Jerry West, Elgin Baylor, Wilt Chamberlain, Magic Johnson, and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Originally from Illinois, Hearn came to Los Angeles in 1956 and did radio and TV work in a variety of sports before getting his gig with the Lakers. He was also the long-time host of "Bowling for Dollars." Hearn has also done the play-by-play for other sports including the 1992 Summer Olympics. He began as a flight broadcaster in Burden of Truth in 1957. Goofy In Soccermania is his only DTVA appearance. His most recent credit was Longshot: The Movie and he was also an announcer in White Men Cannot Jump. He did appear in a few cartoons like Life With Louie and Garfield & Friends. He has 38 credits to his resume and 28 Self credits.
Scrooge walks in acting like a dick as he brings in green sweater proclaiming that they need to look like a real team. Ummm; why didn't he do that BEFORE the finals? Logic break #1 for the episode at the halfway mark of this special. Goat takes the white hanky and blows into it as Scrooge wants the boys to speak up and Scrooge just stops speaking as one of the nephews give Scrooge a written note and Scrooge reads it as we hear a Beagle Boy translating the spelling which explains where Baloo got his bad spelling from in Vowel Play. Oh; and Goofy is tied up and not making it to the game. And they tell Scrooge to polish the trophy as Scrooge is not liking this at all. So Scrooge paces around blowing off the Beagle Boys as he gives the pep talk of doom proclaiming that their honor, pride (and his pocketbook) are at stake. The nephews blow him off for not caring about Sport Goofy and only caring about a trophy as the animals simply walk out sulking as somber music plays. Scrooge looks defeated as they do now. The pitfalls of being rich I see as we head to field level as Chick is announcing about the jacked up white hot crowd as they are booing the fleeting Beagle Boys right out of the building. Well; now that Scrooge's speech has made things worse; the Beagle Boys don't have to cheat to win. But they will because they are the heels see; and the if they play babyface; the crowd will cheer for them and laugh the storyline babyfaces out of the building. The Greenbacks run in and everyone gasps in horror as the team captain isn't with them. We head back to the Beagle Boy's living room as some of the boys are watching television while mocking Sports Goofy who is tied to a chair. And it's clear where the Ducktales Beagle Boys got their rope tying skills because Goofy's knees aren't tied up either.
Goofy; bless his goofy heart; proclaims that it's not who is on the team, but that they play their best. The Beagle Boys have the most dumbfounded look of their faces. HAHA! The Beagle Boys whisper yell that Goofy is naive. NO?! REALLY?! The two boys ask if he wants anything and Goofy asks for some water. So the Beagle Boy brings a glass out of nowhere and sprays water right in Goofy's face. Goofy thanks him for the water and tells him that this will do. Yeap; he's so naive. So we head to the center of the soccer field as a purple dodo like bird with Scrooge's glasses and a black vest has the soccer ball. We discover that he's the referee known as Four Eyes Fowler. Oh snap! He places the ball down on the ground. The Greenbacks claim that they can do this as we discover that the ostrich has a name is known as Max "The Kid" Maxwell. If you thought Spritz T. Cat from Samurai Pizza Cats was a dumb name. We play and the Beagle Boys use the dreaded oil slick to their advantage. CHEAT TO WIN! Scrooge really gets on Fowler's case as the Beagle Boys throws the seal away into the nephews and everyone not the goaltender due to them slipping on the oil slick. So the Beagle Boys have a convoy to the net and they kick the ball right into the groin of the elephant which doesn't even come close to crossing the line as it bounces away in spite of the goalie being in the net. Fowler scores it as a goal anyway and it's 1-0 just like that. THAT REF IS BOUGHT OFF! So one of the Beagle Boys does the ref bump in a freakin soccer game and steals the glasses. That is really pointless since this referee has basically let the Beagle Boys get away with anything. It's basically a soccer version of a No DQ Street Fight. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
So the Greenbacks make the comeback as the cheetah does the bicycle kick while the nephews get squashed by two Beagle Boys. So the goalkeeper for the Beagle Boys builds a brick wall and the ball bounced off and it's heartbreak (which will be the hippo's name from now on.) as the hippo ducks and Max Maxwell swallows the ball whole. I would call this a hand ball violation; but the ref is down so it doesn't matter at this point. Beagle Boy steals Max and does a spear throw and lands right beyond the goal line. Where is that stupid elephant to block that? What a load that elephant goalkeeper is; he didn't even try to at least get back towards the goal line. So it's 2-0 Beagle Boys as Scrooge is horrified at all this wrestling level cartoony cheating. So one of the boys paints a bowling ball into a soccer ball and rolls it as the announcers calls this chicanery. No crap Sherlock Hearn. Goat tries to head one off and shatters like glass on contact and then gets whacked by the bowling ball as it goes through the goal taking Fowler who has found his glasses and the ball and he hit the brick wall with a splat while going through the net. Well; you cannot blame the elephant for that one as the Beagle Boys are up 3-0. We then segue back to the Beagle Boy's house as Goofy calls this cheating. He just noticed that NOW?! The Beagle Boys mock him as we hear the commentary as Goofy notices a knife on a desk near some ham where the Beagle Boy is. So Goofy does some leg lifting skills to pull the sock off his foot with his own mouth. A note about Goofy: Note that his foot is more like a white man's foot. In some of the older shorts and even in Goof Troop in some cases; the foot is completely black in color. Apparently; some believe that this was incredibly racist and it was recolored. I cannot tell if it was the case here; but I just want to point that out.
Anyhow; he grabs the knife with his foot as Chick tells us that one of the Beagle Boys' name is McGurder. Wow; even in this world they screw up the whole context of the Beagle Boys. Goofy almost screws up and the knife goes flying; but Goofy catches it with his foot and brings it back as we return to the stadium as the Beagle Boys are literally steam rolling over the Greenbacks as the Greenback look like dollar bills soon to be rejects for Darkwing Duck. Scrooge looks into the video camera and proclaims that he's ruined and finished as he cannot take it anymore and wants to know where the hell Sport Goofy is. So we segue back to the hideout as the Beagle Boy twins introduce him to us and we see that Goofy is gone and he's loose. The Beagle Boys are pissed and we go outside as they drive in a truck as they chase Sport Goofy who apparently is also a marathon runner with Ben Johnson sprinting abilities. Those sponsored by Larson & Gary's Magical Screw Canadians of Their Reputation Elixir...
...allegedly.
Okay; let's move on as the truck catches up with Sports Goofy and honks the horn. So Goofy finds the conveniently placed lamp pole and swings around it as the tires screech and the BB's are forced to turn 180 degrees the opposite direction. I should note that I am reviewing a DVD cut of the special and the crack Disney Captions team strikes again by spelling tires, tyres. Seriously. Sadly; tyres is a legit word because it's the British spelling for tires. The chase must continue as Goofy jumps up and takes down the conveniently placed big ass toothbrush from the "Brush Your Teeth" billboard (payoff!) and pole vaults over a brick wall. Yes; I'm serious about that one too. The truck hits the brick wall and crashes into a million pieces off-screen with explosions as Goofy runs into the light and we return to the stadium as Chick continues his commentary as the Greenbacks are only trailing the Beagle Boys by a score of ten to nothing. They are still better than the Duckberg baseball team by a mile as the Beagle Boys run off the field while the Greenbacks are dragging themselves off the field. We do get a shot of a starter's pistol shooting because they are now at halftime.
Now we go to the entertainment portion of the game as we head to the center as a pig in a blue marching uniform is providing the marching and the entire band. And people say Scrooge is CHEAP?! The repeated animation hurts this sequence too as we head to the Beagle Boy's locker room as the boys high five each other and are already celebrating because there is no way in hell the Greenbacks are coming back. No way at all; this is the most ugly squash this side of Outback Jack. We head to the locker room of the Greenback as everyone seems to have a far away look as if they are suffering from concussions. Only the nephews are alive as even Scrooge looks seriously screwed up. About as much as 50webs is now. They hear footsteps and then the door opens and Sports Goofy has arrived to save the day and everyone is pepped up instantly. Scrooge is so happy as he goes to Goofy and wants to plan his attack to take back this game and win. Everyone cheers as Goofy wants them to show them what they really are. We segue back to the Beagle Boys in a huddle. Huh? What happened to the background here? Oh wait; they are on the field as the leader of the team wants to go for injury to add to insult now. And then they gasp as Sports Goofy is now walking on the pitch. Beagle Boys are mad; but the leader decides that they will MURDER him good during the game.
So we head to center as Fowler is still having problems with his glasses as he asks both teams if they are ready and Goofy is ready as the Beagle Boys show how ready they are by snarling. Yeap; they are ready. Flower blows his whistle as we begin the second half with the boys rushing towards the goal as Chick seems to know more about the Beagle Boys then I do, as we discover that one of the Beagle Boys is called Shaw and Switchblade. Wait; a TaleSpin character is playing this sport? They rush past the babyfaces towards the goal and shoot the ball as the elephant looks scared; but Goofy runs in, jumps and does a block with his body. Which is a perfectly legal move on his part. Yes; my friends, we are supposed to believe Sports Goofy is such a sports god that he can take on the Beagle Boys by himself in soccer. What else can I say? Goofy kicks an awesome shot that hits the net and sets the goalkeeper's head on fire. HAHA! Sleeping beauty has awaken according to Chick. It's 10-1. Goofy scores another quick one as the nephews do their trademark triplet ladder spot to headbutt the head away from Shotgun (another Beagle Boy Chick notices) as Max Maxwell carries the ball with his head and headbutts it in for a 10-3 score. Okay; this is much better now. Cheetah kicks one with great speed to make it 10-4 and then the Beagle Boy goal keeper gets caught in the multiple soccer balls in the net spot. So we go to 10-9 as the Beagle Boys decide to hang on by doing the Beagle Boy wall on Sports Goofy. So Goofy speeds up like Sonic The Hedgehog two years before he existed as he fakes them out and tires them to death. Sports Goofy score a 20 foot nodder to tie the score at 10.
The crowd is popping good now as the Beagle Boy leader wants to really murder them now; and I betcha he MEANS it literally. So Goofy is heading to the goal as we discover that the goalkeeper is named Weasel. I smell lawsuit since Bobby Heenan trademarked that name. So the entire team surrounds Goofy and tackles into the FCC FRIENDLY CLOUDDUST BEATDOWN OF DEATH as the announcer blows off Fowler and Scrooge puts the glasses back on Fowler and turns him around. Fowler finally sees it and blows the whistle on them as there is three seconds left. Oh god this is stupid. Let me count the ways: (1) Fowler allowed the Beagle Boys to cheat BEFORE he lost his glasses during the referee bump and (2) Soccer is not played like basketball or hockey. You have 90 minutes of regular time and then if the game stops on calls or injuries; the clock still runs and when 45 minutes in a half; or 90 minutes pass in the regular game; you then play on as injury time until the time is made up. Once this is made up (which can take a good five-ten minutes depending on the stalled time.); then the game ends. And most people; even announcers don't know how much injury time is left. The worse part of this is that this episode was getting into an awesome groove until now. So the babyface console Goofy who is out like a light as Fowler wants the ball (oh; and none of the boys even get a yellow card let alone a red card which would have them forfeiting the game to the Greenbacks due to no players left due to DQ. Sadly; that would be a screwjob finish though.) and we see the Beagle Boys making a line so they can hide one of the boys stuffing TNT into the soccer ball. That's the spirit lads. MURDER Scrooge the old Bugs Bunny way. AHHAHAHAHAHAHA!
So we hear some boing sounds as a Beagle Boy is flicking the black spheres on the remote control device (which has two button; a red and green button) and the leader smacks the Beagle Boy in the face. So he is the Burger of the outfit as Big Time Leader tells him that when Goofy kicks the ball; push the red button. Burger gets it and nods like a dog. Well; he is a dogsperson so it makes perfect sense. So Big Time gives the ball to Fowler and it opens it to reveal the TNT; but Beagle Boy closes it up and Fowler thanks him and is as clueless as ever. Nick Patrick would be proud of him. Fowler has the ball as we get the thrilling penalty kick to end the game. Goofy gets up and he's completely out on his feet and has a concussion I bet. Sadly; it's 1987 and we didn't know better back then. So Goofy is seeing multiple balls (NOT THOSE ONES!) as Chick tells us that the goalie cannot move nor Goofy cannot do a sneaky kick. So Goofy runs forward kicks the ball and Burger presses the button and nothing happens...because Burger is pushing the green button. Wow; a finish that makes complete sense. Weasel realizes that he is screwed as he is forced to get back in position; but it's too late as the ball sails into the net and the gun goes off two seconds later as the Greenbacks win the game 11-10 in a wild, chippy affair. The crowd pops so much the entire stadium jumps up and down with glee. Doesn't Chick realize that Yes Virgina; There is a Santa Claus (and Openoffice doesn't see Virgina as a word or state either) is trademarked? Everyone celebrates, football victory spot on Goofy as the paid attendance is 73,000 and 72,960 of them are cardboard stiffs. AHHAHAHAHAHAHA! Scrooge collects his trophy and kisses it.
Meanwhile we cut to the Beagle Boys sulking as they hold the soccer ball as Burger is still pushing the green button. So the leader takes the remote control and blows him off. We then cut to the Greenbacks continuing to celebrate and then we get the off-screen explosion of doom for no reason showing that the leader of the Beagle Boys has the same smarts as Burger. As in: no smarts whatsoever. They fly into the air and then land into a roofless jail truck which comes out of nowhere and has no context or reason whatsoever. Wait; were they on an outstanding warrant or something? Scrooge proclaims that he'll see them in 10-20 years as the truck drives away with the sign: Public Enemy #1. Ummm; yeah. So Scrooge is surrounded by microphones as they ask what is Scrooge going to do with the trophy. Scrooge takes the trophy and proclaims that it's going in a place safe and secure so no one gets it...and he picks the Duckberg Museum as the curator returns. Scrooge than whisper yells asking him if the trophy is tax deductible as the curator states that it is. Scrooge gives him the trophy as the nephews want him to join the team picture as all the babyface huddle together as Scrooge dives in and we get flash bulbs as Goofy proclaims the moral of the story and a soccer ball bounces off his head and more pictures are taken as we zoom out to a B&W picture of the team and that ends the special at 19:39. Well; that was shorter than I expected it to be. This was a really great special; but some logic breaks and some things didn't quite make sense near the finish. Still; I enjoyed this more than the Ducktales Movie despite being much much longer than this special. Good work Goofy. Sadly; it would take another six years for Goofy to get his show and it was a Home Improvement Wannabe. Sad; because Sports Goofy was awesome in hindsight. Call it **** 1/4 (85%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Well; power outage aside (which didn't do much damage at all as I was nearly done anyway); the Sports Goofy In Soccermania special is in the books; and it's the best Fathers Day special that I have ever done (outside of the For Whom The Bell Klangs special re-rant OAV) and the best one I have seen. Sports Goofy was awesome and he played as if he was a Goofy who doesn't try to intentionally do or say anything stupid. He's naive; but that develops him sympathy and I cared about the character even most so near the finish when he got the concussion. I really liked this Ducktales world; but seriously, this was basically a gift for Will Ryan and Tony Pope as they stole the show voice wise. The storyline was very good; although some of the aspects could have been built up better like when the Greenbacks started winning; there was no built up as to when they turned the corner and became a tour de force. Also; it played like Take Me Out Of The Ball Game; only funnier and no Duckworth to ruin it. The Beagle Boys are still dumb but a lot more dangerous than the Beagle Boys of Ducktales. Although I still enjoy the comedy value of Burger so there you go. I found the finish to be dumb because it only happened because the Burger Beagle Boy with the remote was stupid enough to press the green button even though Goofy had a concussion. Plus; the whole logic with the referee wasn't all that good and a few repeat animations from a studio that does feature and the rules of soccer in this world aren't quite the same as the real world version. Still; this was a really fun special to look at and I laughed a lot through it.
I don't know the ratings for the special; but four months later, Ducktales was born and that show looked 100% different from this one. Sports Goofy pretty much died after this because he played soccer which is hated by Americans (Ask Jim Rome about it; he blames soccer on nuclear war and genocide for crying out loud) and Goofy apparently lost a lot of brain cells when he got that concussion in this one due to the Beagle Boys beating him down that six years later; he was a Tim Allen wannabe in his new show Goof Troop. While a lot of people suggested that Goof Troop was the downfall; TaleSpin was the downfall because DTVA hit the sweet spot with that show and Darkwing Duck basically had to be comedy just to keep the audience from thinking it was a me too show; and that resulted in a lot of sloppiness in many of the episodes and DTVA went downhill hitting low points at Bonkers, (Lucky episodes) Quack Pack, Teamo Surpemo and Brandy & Mr. Whiskers before getting back with Gargoyles, Kim Possible, Teacher's Pet, Filmore and Phineas & Ferb. It's really sad because Sports Goofy was a perfect series which could have educated us on sports and how they are played; while entertaining us with colorful villains trying to screw Goofy over; but Goofy comes back and wins. That was MONEY BABEE and it pains me almost as much as TaleSpin being considered filler by Michael Eisner to see no one taking advantage of that. Then again; you guessed it. So now we head to Darkwing Duck and hopefully; 50 Webs will be back up by then. So....
Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you all next time.