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Mega Man Ruby Spears: Campus Commandos Rant
Reviewed: 06/04/2022
Doctor Wily Is A Campus Commando!
So, we continue season two of the blue dweeb's life with episode #22 as Light creates a college to school robots in various subjects, not the least of which is how to build his newest invention: an anti-gravity device. Dr. Wily on the other hand decides he wants the device for himself and attacks the school to get it, reprogramming many of the students to help him accomplish this task. How does this episode fare? Let's rant on shall we...?!
Campus Commandos is written by Micheal Maurer and was directed by Katsumi Minoguchi.
We begin this episode on the campus of Dr. Light University where we get our robot degrees, we have been getting more respect since 1995! Dr. Light is on the podium addressing the crowd, which is Rock, Rush, Roll, the entire Dr. Light American Football team, Karate Man, Artist Man, and three Cheer Women with yellow pom-poms. They might as well do a parody of The Village People going to college, it would have been similar if you want cheap stereotypes. Plus, the artwork in this shot isn't good either. The crack logic team now has SEVEN Cheer Women doing a cheerleading spot and the animation is not good and the cheer itself sounds incredibly awkward. Pom Poms fly into the sky as Dr. Light continues his spiel while the mayor and Bree Recotta are in the background watching from the side. Head into the skies with the Wily Machine RS flying high and I'm waiting with baited breath for Dr. Wily to have absolutely no shame whatsoever and attack a university grand opening. Yeah, the Tiny Toons opening spiel parody of mine was dumb. Head inside the cockpit with Dr. Light finishing his spiel on the monitor, because helping mankind is the prime objective of robots because humans cannot be trusted to help themselves. See Dr. Wily himself, with another episode featuring Snake Man, Guts Man, Cut Man and Proto Man piloting. Memo to Blues: When you say "Speak for yourself", you're implying that Dr. Light is projecting, which is not the case here; as Dr. Light geninuely wants robots to help mankind. Dr. Wily tells Blues to let it go because Dr. Wily is going to be the new dean of the university by force and force the robots to do his bidding and not help mankind for the sake of that Santa-Claus wannabe. We head to the football field and it's 20XX and the football field looks like it's from a Division III school from the 1950's. There is a marching band robot squad that is so low rent, I swear the robots are literally in the 1990's. The bleachers are even worse as they look half-assed. Rock, Rush, Karate Man, Artist Man and the American Football Man who if he changed into a baseball motif, he would be Strike Man from Mega Man 10! The guise of this is that Roll has enrolled in the university to learn more stuff. Okay. Rock declines the offer to join because he has a full time job dealing with Dr. Wily. Quarterbot is a better name than I realized since the bot is the quarterback of the football team. Always gives 25 cents for tips, too. More generous than Nickelback.
Karate Man is taking robot martial arts lessons to help in the defense of the city as Karate Man demonstrates his kung fu stance and for 75% of it, it's much better than anyone on this show and than he does a forward roll and lands hard on his ass, thus 25% of it is worse than Cut Man's. On par with Drake Mallard, though. Rock helps Karate Man up because it takes a lot of practice. Artist Man brings out his paint brush arm to demonstrate that he's a creator, not a destroyer; which is in perfect time for a laser beam to fire and crumble a roof. Never the least bit subtle there, eh Dr. Homo Sapien Vampiris?! Robot bail as Wily Machine RS continues firing in the sky as more robot students bail. Roll, Rock and Rush meet and Roll states the obvious to us. Rock plans to nip it in the butt. Earth to blue dweeb: It's "nip it in the bud", you are implying anal sex here and Dumptruck got into enough trouble as it is four years ago in Ransom Of The Red Chimp. Rush turns into Rush Jet and Rock gets on; as they head into the sky. Jump cut to the Wily Machine RS as the flame animation is worse than any NES game on the planet. Head inside the cockpit, which looks like it has TARDIS effects now. Dr. Wily orders his robots to storm the campus; but Blues overrules him because Rock and Rush are on the monitor. Dr. Wily is not loving life, and calls Rock a blue dweeb barely two minutes in and to blast him out of the sky. You know we are in for a car crash episode when Dr. Wily is already calling Rock that name so early. Blues calls this one order he doesn't mind taking as we shoot lasers at Rock for a while. Rock dodges all and then shoots and hits the Wily Machine RS with hilariously bad selling inside. Blues is angry and pushes some button on a panel and shoots his yellow laser back, and this hits Rush and knocks Rock off of it. Blues thinks he's won; but Rock lands on top of the roof of Wily Machine RS and shoots the roof open. They repeat the footage of the bad selling of the heels, just with different dialogue. Yup, this is going to be a long one, folks. Proto Man then just tips the steering wheel to the right and Rock falls off just like that. Again, you wonder why Dr. Wily calls him a blue dweeb?! Rush rides in to make the save though, so there you go. Rock decides to call off the fight because he's low on energy and Rush Jet lands on the football field saying "I don't want to". Cut Man, Guts Man and Snake Man jump out the back of Wily Machine RS and parachute down on campus.
Cut to behind the bushes with Dr. Light and the mayor stating the obvious for us. Wait, where's Bree Recotta? Did they write her out via teleport?! Dr. Light has a remote control device and turns it on to reveal a glass dome like forcefield as the heels bounce off the dome with ease despite the positioning putting them inside the campus on the sky shot earlier. Yup, this is a trainwreck in execution despite a great premise. Dr. Wily is pissed off as he uses the red tractor beam to get the robots back inside the Wily Machine RS and retreats. Why didn't Dr. Light just do this from the start so Rock didn't lose power for no good reason?! Mayor is so gaslit by this that he thanks Mega Man for everything even though Dr. Light could have used the forcefield from the start and avoided such trouble in the first place. Sure, some damage would have been unavoidable since the babyfaces were taken off-guard; but still. Dr. Light then brings out a student ID card (a credit card) to say that no one can get in or out without it and Dr. Light blows him off for it on the monitor inside the Wily Machine RS. Roll heads to a computer outside as she takes out her ID card, but a book she's holding falls onto the ground. It is picked up by the debut of Top Man. This robot master is great because he's playing 1999 Lex Lugar in WCW: He's so douchey, so unrespectable. He picks up the book and returns it to Roll, as the promo he cuts is clearly telling the audience that he's a womanizer as well. Top Man is supposed to be a horrible robot on campus and he's playing it to the hilt. Including taking Roll's ID card and making a copy of it using a black box like device that is clearly shown behind his back. Roll doesn't suspect a thing, which makes Top Man look like an even bigger douchebag. Top Man says his farewells for now as Roll is charmed and this is so great. There are two things great about this episode: Top Man and the premise. While the execution of the premise is horrible, Top Man's booking isn't. Roll slides her ID card into the slot, the wall opens and Roll heads inside loving this Toppy fellow. Dr. Light, Rock and Rush follow with Dr. Light's ID card being used, as Dr. Light is more interested in inventions than football practice. No surprise there as we head to Skull Fortress RS and inside the main lab as Top Man and Dr. Wily exchange notes and digital ID codes. Dr. Wily has a copying code device and creates multiple student ID cards for the robot masters. Four of them.
So, Blues isn't going on this mission?! I mention this because I'm certain they will find a way to screw this one up as well. Anyhow, Dr. Wily brings out metal ear plugs disguised as mind control devices because he wants to create an army of robots for world domination, starting with the campus. Okay, what kind of robot does Dr. Wily want with Artist Man? I mean, Dr. Wily is the type of person who would burn books he didn't like and then burn the robots/humans making them. So, we do a seamless scene change to Cut Man and Guts Man entering the campus with their cards. No sign of Top Man nor Snake Man at all. So, why make four cards?! Head to the bleachers for some bonding time with Rock and Karate Man. They watch football practice and I'm surprised I don't hear these signal counts in the NFL at any point in their careers. I have heard of James Harden, which is always a running play and not a pass. The cheerleaders cheer in the background as they address the team as the Robot Raiders, so the university is related to Texas Tech (Red Raiders) I would think. The animation is awful, but at least it's within the logic of American rules football, minus the "literal run & shoot offense using an arm cannon to shoot the football literally". The pass is good, but there is a touchdown saving tackle as the cheerleaders are annoyed by Rush's hideously hilariously bad cheerleading cosplaying. Ironically, Rush's dancing was more better animated than the rest of the scene. The cheerleaders throw their pom-poms in the air and if they smother Rush to death, would we care? Ummmmm...nope. Rush cannot see a lick as he walks into the field of play and gets crushed by the football players. Pfft, whatever. Rush has the ball, but is flatter than my sex life as the football team all decides to go into the cafetera for some lunch. Rock and Karate come down for some plasma shakes; but here comes Proto Man, Guts Man and Snake Man, who appears to be ill, since the color stylist in this episode cannot keep Snake Man's face colors consistant. Sigh. Rock and Karate cut them off as the fire fight begins. Lots of dodging and shooting make Gregory Weagle something something, and somehow Proto Man goes through the wall inside the campus creating a hole. Wait, what?! There was no sign that Blues was shot nor even close to a shot being anywhere near him. Does the forcefield increase the range of the power of suggestion?!
Snake Man shoots Search Snakes, Rock dodges, shoots the basketball backboard, the net goes onto Snake Man's head, Snake Man takes a shot to the chest and GETS IN THE BIN~! Head first, I might add. I guess it's Snake Man's turn for a complete burial and it just had to be this episode. Guts Man tears off a basketball backboard which looks exactly the same as the one earlier. While this is cheap animation, I'm fine with that because usually a basketball court has two nets on opposite sides. It's not a logic break, the staging was odd. Rock dodges Guts Man playing fly swatter for a while as Karate Man decides to run in from behind, like a heel; but he blows his covers doing too much for his own good. At least, his Karate is better than Cut Man. Speaking of Cut Man, where is he?! Karate Man gets squashed like a bug by Guts Man, but his running of interfernce is enough for Rock to try to shoot Guts Man in the back, but Blues shoots Rock in the back for good measure and Rock is down selling pain. Blues is a heel anyway, so Karate Rock deserve that. Thank you Proto Man for demonstrating sportmenship and fair play. Blues wants to lock the two babyfaces up, so they pick a conveniently placed storage room and seal the door shut as Guts Man proclaims that they have a lunch date with someone. Probably Roll, knowing these robot masters. Rock and Karate Man sit up as Rock's blaster is destroyed by the Proto Buster. Cut to Cut Man and Guts Man entering a door. So yes, they screwed up the ID cards thingie as they had four cards when they should have five. Sure, one of them might have come together; but if that's true: Why have four cards, why not have one or two depending on the groupthink?! Rush notices them entering and follows them. Jump cut to inside the kitchen as a door gets broken down. Chef Man is making metal box pasta it seems demands answers to this outrage. Guts Man grabs Chef Man, Cut Man opens the door to the cupboards and throws him inside. Cut Man shuts the door and on the closeup, it appears to be a badly drawn Top Man! The continuity of this episode is so bad, it's like watching a bad Teddy Ruxpin episode. Rush looks on from an open window and comes down from behind the heels. I betcha Rush will bite Guts Man on the leg here. I check the video...Nope! Cut Man puts mind control chips in the robot desert bowls on trays. Jump cut to Rock using a crowbar to open the door and let him and Karate Man out.
The heels are so stupid today, as we head to the cafetera with a lineup for food with some of the robots, Cheer Women, Quarterman, and of course Roll. Cut Man gets to play Chef Man and because he has to be the heel, the chef's hat is black. Bigot. Worse, Guts Man doesn't even bother putting a disguise on and ROLL, the one who has faced Guts Man countless times before, doesn't even notice. Either Top Man is an excellent gaslighter, or this is a gaping logic hole. So, the babyfaces grab their meals and are about to eat them. Cheer Woman, Artist Man, Quarterman and Roll are about to eat their lunch, when Rush runs in and uses all his paw to seal their mouths and proclaims that they shouldn't eat them because of mind control chips. Then Rush stops and the babyfaces at the table notice everyone else has glowing red eyes, an indication of mind control. Now, I know it was pointless for Rush to do this because of the gaping logic break earlier in this scene, but I blame the animators for not giving Guts Man a disguise because Roll acted like she didn't see Guts Man anywhere. Cut Man at least wore a chef's hat and it not like flimsy disguises have fooled babyfaces and heels before in other shows. Do I have to bring back Baloo's mustache in All's Whale That Ends Whale. The students who aren't brainwashed decide to act like they are brainwashed and another thing: How did the reprogamming work if they ate the chips? Answer: Swallow them whole, robots cannot choke unless the object is way too big. Also, why not program the robots instead of sending them to college. Answer: The story is that university gives the robots actual agency like humans. When you understand that and not be a sociopath, this makes sense. Anyhow, the mind control robot slaves all obey Dr. Wily's commands to the absolute letter, which is always funny as Rock runs in. Dr. Wily calls Rock a blue dweeb for the second time in this first act alone and orders the enslaved robots to kill Rock as a homework assignment. All the robot slaves stand up and repeat his command but leave out the "as a homework assignment". Damn; I wish they said that, that would have been money. Rock bounces off the conveniently placed table of robot food and the scene is staged so poorly that the food should have went up into the air and land on Rock; but the spot had the plates, trays and food land on the robot slaves. Blues is pissed off about this as he uses the Blues Busters and Rock dodges it with ease.
Roll is hating this so called unfair fight, despite the fact that ROCK is the one fighting dirty in more ways than one in spite of losing his Rock buster. It's not Blues' fault that Dr. Light created the blue dweeb to lose plasma power this easily. Damn, you know this episode really sucks when I'm channeling CWF75 from Youtube. Roll runs in to try to make the save, and out of nowhere comes Top Man being as douchy as he can be as he literally does Top Spin and knocks Roll the f out with it before Roll can use the two slice toaster arm again. Good for Top Man! NO ONE SHOULD BE SELLING TWO SLICES OF TOAST ON THIS SHOW UNLESS THEY ARE EATING IT~! This distracts Rock as Blues shoots Rock in the chest and knocks him the F out. What a blue dweeb?! The non-mind control babyfaces all exit the cafetera during this as Cut Man notices this right away. HA! So, the robot masters surround Rock as Rock makes threats because he'll revive in a matter of time. Dr. Wily on the monitor blows him off and we jump cut to a shot of outside with a sparkle on the clock which is the signal to head inside of the clock tower where Rock and Roll are tied up with regular rope in the gear as the heels are going to crumble them via gear squishing! Somehow, despite not being involved in anyway; RUSH is tied up on the gears on the pan shot. WHAT?! Roll is angry at Top Man, Rock doesn't love life anymore and Rush gulps as we end with a shot of Roll's face meeting the winding gears to end the segment almost ten minutes in. This episode is a total mess thus far and only Top Man is making this worth my while.
After the commercial break; Roll is looking at the gears in probably the best animated scene in this episode so far and even that isn't saying much. Roll hopes Dr. Light recycles her if she dies, which is creepy if you put more than ten seconds of thought into the line as Rock's buster is short-circuted and the sparks break the ropes. Way to go, heels! This is why you use chains instead as Rush looks like his eyecatchers from Season one. Instead of sparking the ropes for Roll and Rush; Rock goes outside, swings the clock hand backwards and this stops the clock completely. WHAT?! Shouldn't the clock gears go backwards and Rush and Roll crush themselves into the floor, or go into the gears backwards. What a stupid logic break this was?! Rock swinging on a clock hand would have been hilarious if it wasn't about freeing your friends. So stupid! Roll is relieved that logic decided to take a holiday on this very day as it was a close vice grip if you catch my drift. Head outside the school and then jump cut inside a giant lab with Dr. Light at his desk writing notes about anti-gravity vectors, because he's making an anti-gravity device as a tool to teach students about the effects of gravity. Why? Why not?! It is a educational place after all, so education on gravity makes sense here. In comes the Tackle Bots out of nowhere as Dr. Light praises them for being dedicated students. One of them grabs Dr. Light by the lab coat as Dr. Light demands answers to this outrage as Dr. Wily appears on the monitor proclaiming that the robots will build the anti-gravity device on their own terms. Dr. Light pleads for this to not happen as Dr. Wily's motive is to rip City Hall off of it's foundations and rule the world as a vampire with cluster b traits would. Head into the forest off campus with Rock, Rush and Roll fleeing the scene. Oh, and Dr. Light is heading to the prisoner storage room as the four babyfaces robots who are not affected by the mind control devices are behind the bushes, telling the other babyfaces to hide with them to avoid two Tackle Bots looking for someone. Karate Man is ready to choose violence, but Rock is clearly not ready since he needs to see Dr. Light about fixing the Rock Buster. So, it's Rush's NOSE OF SNIFFS time as Rush sniffs the air and finds a scent that leads to a small steel building that looks literally like an over-sized doghouse. Yeah, sure. Rock tells everyone but Roll and Rush to stand guard while they go inside.
Then we get another logic break: Rush notices Tackle Bots coming and warns Roll and Rock before getting squashed by the Tackle Bots AGAIN! One problem: How didn't ANYONE ELSE see them coming and warn Rush?! DUMB! Rock kicks a conveniently placed trash bin like a soccer man and knocks out two Tackle Bots. Roll gets surrounded by two more on the sky shot as we discover that her grappling hook gun is called a Plumber Snake. Oooookkkkkaaaayyyyy. She uses it on a tree to let the Tackle Bots have a meeting of the minds. And it wasn't at concussion protocol. Second meeting of the minds (still not at concussion protocol) caused by Rock doing the lamest Hell Wheel on one of the Tackle Bots. If Ken Masters show that, he would have laughed the blue dweeb right out of the episode. Roll calls Rush a bro for some reason, did Top Man get her so hard that she thinks Rush is Matt Riddle?! Ugh. Rock kicks down the steel door and we see Dr. Light tied up and gagged in the storage room, so it was a different room. Head back to storage AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) as all the babyfaces are in the room as Dr. Wily fixes Rock's buster, but it's an emergency stop gap for a while. Where were the rest of the bots?! They could have shown growth in their abilities, and instead; it's all on Rock. This is like Ice Age, only it annoys me more since I wasn't a fan of the three punk teenagers being better citizens subplot. Anyhow, Rock wants to get the anti-gravity device away that hasn't been completed yet and Dr. Light states the obvious as he is underestimating Wily's plans. You seriously think Dr. Wily wants just the city; after episode and episode of wanting world domination. Never think too small when it comes to vampires, it makes you look dumber. Head outside again, and then into the lab with Dr. Wily on the monitor ordering the robots to work, work, work! Dr. Wily has a deadline because Rock will be free to kick his ass at a moment's notice. Guts Man grabs one of the scientist bots by the head and throws him into a pile of dead scientist bots, thus showing his anti-science simpleton way of violence, despite the fact that the scientist bots was working hard and took no break whatsoever. Another student bot takes it's place looking worried as ever, so the brainwashing doesn't have the desired effect you would think it would had. Head outside to a door with two Tackle Bots on the right side as the babyfaces are in foreground wondering what to do.
Rock cannot do a direct assault because it would warn the others and also, Rock's blaster abilities are limited. Roll has a plan and finally the other bots get to do some work out of nowhere without a sign of progression. This episode's premise is so good, but the booking of it is terrible. Sheepskin Deep, this isn't and it doesn't help that Sheepskin Deep has better animation than this episode either. Cheer Woman enters with the cheerleading distraction as she throws pom-poms into the Tackle Bots' face and then bails straight away. The Tackle Bots follow her saying that she is one of the robots who did not fall for Dr. Wily's mind control. Then we get another logic break: We see Cheer Woman running around the area as Artist Man draws a picture of Mega Man on the wall. The Tackle Bot clearly see Artist Man, but they also see Mega Man and ignore Artist Man which should have been a clue that something is up. Tackle Bot #1 shoots the wall with Rock, and blows it up. The Tackle Bots check the pieces of the wall and realize that they were duped. DUMB! Quarterman and Karate Man come in from behind and whack trash cans onto the heads of the Tackle Bots and knock them out. What a bunch of simpletons?! They might as well be Guts Man's cousins; which is apporo since Dr. Light created Guts Man in the first place. We head back into the lab as the finishing touches to the anti-gravity device is complete. Proto Man informs Dr. Wily of the completed plans and Dr. Wily is loving life. Wily Machine RS has made it to the campus as he orders Blues to remove the forcefield on his signal. Dr. Wily is also loving the fact that he is going to give the mayor a big surprise for defying him in the Big Shake, too; only there will be no mercy on him this time around, I bet. Oh, and Rock is here to shoot ass and chew robot gum. He's also out of robot gum, by the way; apparently, it causes Snake Man to have whiteface on himself for goodness knows what reason. Rock shoots and hits Blues in the face and chest and Proto Man goes down. That's revenge for Blues taking out his cannon from earlier. Search Snake is fired, Rock takes out a pipe and the snake goes through the pipe instead of chewing said pipe like it usually does and nails Snake Man so hard that it crumbles Snake Man to pieces in a creep out spot. So, pipe takes out Snake Man, but wooden table takes out Rock by Guts Man. This booking has so many logic holes, that someone loves Swiss cheese way too much.
Of course, Guts Man is such an idiot that he thinks a table is a door. Guts Man laughs so hard that he forgot that Rock was playing dead and gets shot in the chest and gets knocked the F out. HAHA! Rock blows him off for that gaffe as Rock tries to go for the anti-gravity device, but Top Man is here to save the episode from negative stars and he goes into Top Spin. Rock tries to shoot him; but Top Man dodges. WHY?! In the games, Top Man in Top Spin takes the shots and they bounce off of Top Man, so the spot should be that the shots deflect off of Top Man and hit Rock's buster and Rock, knocking him and the buster out. Nope, Top Man, Top Spin Rock down and then uses the anti-gravity device to float Rock into the roof and throw him out of the building. Granted, this in itself is awesome and badass; but come on now! My way would have been even better, considering how much of a mess this episode is already. Oh, and Top Man says goodbye to the blue bomber. He is the only robot master in this show that RESPECTS Mega Man and that makes him even more douchy and not just on the babyfaces either. Rock lands in the bushes knocked out as Dr. Wily is loving life and mocking the blue dweeb for thinking Top Man was the weakest robot master on planet Earth. Never mind that Top Spin kills Gamma The Peace Keeping Robot...NOT...in one hit!. Anyhow, Dr. Wily calls this all for a good cause as there is no one to stop him. Dr. Wily cackles like crazy as Rush is howling at the moon while all the babyfaces are surrounding Rock, who has been moved from the bushes to the grass to end the segment 16 minutes in. Top Man is the star of this episode and has kept this episode past a DUD so far. Oh wait: "MEGA! MEGA! RIGHT BACK! MESSAGES! WOO-WOO!"
After the commercial break; Dr. Light opens the chest plate and checks Rock's circuits and Dr. Light is almost ready to consider Rock as deceased while Roll and Rush shed tears. The other babyfaces don't know what to do as Roll suggests bringing Eddie in and Dr. Light realizes, "good idea" as Rush bails to find Eddie while doing these absurd salutes. So, we get a long sequence of Dr. Wily slowly entering the campus as Cut Man removes the forcefield from the control room and then opens the roof of the office so the Wily Machine RS can comes down and pick up the anti-gravity device. Head back outside as Rush returns with Eddie and the artists cannot decide if Eddie is a Met or not. Luckly, Eddie is not a Met when Eddie walks onto the ground. Eddie pops out an energy can and Rock is force drinking it. No response, other than a green aura surrounding him going in and out. So, Eddie jumps on Rock's chest and nearly stomps on his groin, like that matters. This is enough for Rock to get up because it was a jump start according to Eddie. Rock is confused as Wily Machine RS goes up into the sky with the anti-gravity device in tow and then the forcefield is put up again. Dr. Light goes to the entry computer to swipe the ID card in the slot, nothing because Dr. Wily was smart enough to change the passcode on them. Ooops! Rock is pissed off and wants the robot masters to guard the scrap heap. So, the Stealth Suit is in the lab according to Dr. Light and Rock has a plan for the other babyfaces. We head to the lab as the heels remembered to double security this time around. Quarterman comes out and basically shoots footballs at the Tackle Bots and one of them goes through the wall breaking it. Well, that was really direct. Roll, Artistman and Cheerwoman enter through the downed wall. Now, I thought they were joking about the Power Plant, but lo and behold, there is a legit Power Plant on campus and there is Cut Man and Guts Man guarding the gate. Now, I was expecting Top Man there because Snake Man was completely destroyed in the previous act. Nope! Snake Man is back and magically whole. WHAT THE HELL?! Guts Man is bored like the simpleton that he is and in comes Rock shooting with Rush and Karate Man cutting promos. Snake Man shoots a Search Snake, Rock dodges shoots at Snake Man, misses, but hits a conveniently placed giant globe and Snake Man gets squashed like Dumptruck with the piano. A complete burial of Snake Man.
Now it's time for CUT MAN IS INCOMPENTENT~! You knew this had to happen at some point, especially in an actual bad episode: Karate Man does the funniest HELICOPTER KICK OF DEATH as he spins and completely misses Cut Man! Cut Man thinks he has it made; but Karate Man cuts down a tree with said kick and the tree topples right on Cut Man and Cut Man is knocked the F out. Karate Man calls it the "Triple Flip Super Roundhouse Kick" and Cut Man calls him an XBOT! Xbox fanboys, I have a new meme for you all. Karate Man still falls on his ass and Rock comes in and proclaims that he beat Cut Man. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I died when he said that. Everybody beats Cut Man in this show, and many times Cut Man beats Cut Man! Watch Future Shock and it gets even funnier. Guts Man throw a wooden box that somehow was connected to some electrical device because sparks and electricy are coming out of it. Did BS&P lose their ever loving minds here?! Guts Man throws the wooden crate and Rock sells it like he has a giant metal safe on his chest. WHAT THE HELL?! Rock is also out of power; which makes the obvious censorship even more obvious. I CLUB BS&P! So, Rush flies in with Karate Man throwing Cut Man onto the wooden box, making the BS&P decision even more obvious since Cut Man just lies there. Rock touches Cut Man, WEAPON GET TIME~! It's ironic that Rock is out of Rock Buster power which would kill him in the game but the no kill rule prevents that sort of, but Rolling Cutter gives him a weapon to use. I have now determined the D animation team is working on this episode by the wireframe sequence being a still shot of Rock with the wireframe superimposed, rather than an anime sequence. Rock uses the Rolling Cutter to snip off the giant cap on top of the flagpole and Guts Man is so stupid that he runs in just in perfect time to get KNOBED THE F OUT~! Top Man runs in, cuts another awesome douchy promo and goes into the Top Spin. At this point, Top Man has to lose because the heels are supposed to be stupid in the end and Top Man has been ultra-protected in this episode. So, here's Top Man's demise: Roll flies in via the Stealth Suit; she uses the Plumber Snake to plunger Top Man and raise him into the air, Roll proclaims that she is going to dump him like he dumped her, releases Toppy, Toppy goes into the funniest and dumbest pinball sequence of all time and lands in the fountain. This was AWESOME! Top Man comes out and spits water; perfectly fine, so the weakest robot master loses and still looks like the best robot master out there. Toppy should be in every episode as the third wheel now.
Back to the power plant as Dr. Light turns off the forcefield, so that at least explain where Cut Man was during the turning off of the forcefield. Rock's blaster is completely fix, so I assume a WEAPON GET SEQUENCE, strengthen it. Rock decides to take it from here and head to city hall. Head outside to the skies as Rock is on Rush Jet with the Stealth Suit on as it is chasing Wily Machine RS through the city. Wily Machine RS is now over city hall as Rush bails and Rock flies into the air. Rock goes into stealth mode with the suit as we head back to Wily Machine RS with Dr. Wily loving life and Proto Man getting up with lavander goggles as Blues calls it a stealth tracking glasses. Wow, it took them just THREE episodes to figure this one out. The only way Rock wins now is Dr. Wily beats himself. Proto Man gets out of the back and somehow can fly without a jetpack now. Blues shoots and nails Rock and Rock is knocked back as they exchange war of words for a while and shoot each other and crumble into buildings, although they do their best not to cause too much damage to buildings. Rock is shot at with rocks nailing Rock and causing Rock to free fall into the top of a solar panel ceiling which was originally a regular roof. Sigh. The fire fight is great, but the animation logic is not matching up to make this awesome. More fire fighting ensues as we cut back to Dr. Wily inside the Wily Machine RS which is over city hall as Dr. Wily is loving life. Dr. Wily pushes the button and city hall gets raised from it's foundation as the mayor is inside floating to the ceiling and protesting this outrage as weakly as the animation in this scene. Back to Rock hiding from Blues somewhere as Rock gets up from behind, shoots Blues in the back and Blues free falls into a conveniently placed swimming pool. Pfft, whatever. Rock says farewell to his brother and then flies back to Wily Machine RS as he gets underneath the machine; disattaches the anti-gravity device from Wily Machine and flies it stage left. Wily thinks he's victorious until he sees the anti-gravity device in mid-air in front of him. Instead of shooting at the top and hitting Rock, Dr. Wily throws a temper tantrum like a baby and destorys the control panel of the Wily Machine. What a stupid finish this was?! I get that Wily has to beat himself; but they booked it so Rock gets the anti-gravity device back, so Rock won anyway without Wily beating himself. DUMB! Wily Machine flies away awkwardly as Dr. Wily is panicky and that is that. By the way, I did love it when Dr. Wily ordered Rock to bring back his building. That was funny at least. Head back to the campus of Dr. Light as the mayor thanks Mega Man for saving the day and Rock is being modest about it. Dr. Light also proclaims that the robots under mind control are back to serving mankind again and not a vampire. The Cheerwomen all cheer for the babyfaces as everyone raises the roof and throws pom-poms up into the sky to end the episode at 24:00 approx. Good premise and Top Man being an awesome douchbag aside, this episode sucked. This gets **** on the trainwreck scale for Top Man being the best robot master of all time, even more given his weakling status in the games; Cut Man being Cut Man, The Roll/Toppu subplot being great, logic breaks out of the wazoo, bad animation, bad booking and a really bad finish. Call it ** (40%), because Top Man did a miracle workers job of getting it past DUD. Sadly, we will never see Toppy ever again.
THE REVIEW LINE
Well, this episode was a horrible mess with a good premise and an excellent robot master. The premise of the episode was excellent for the most part as it was about robots having the agency to become better robots and was screwed up by Dr. Wily being Dr. Wily. I would have loved it more if the robots were slowly showing better progress as the episode went on, however; it was swamped by getting the whole anti-gravity device angle over and it's like every episode of Mega Man you ever saw. That's not the biggest flaw of the episode, it's more of a lot of tiny flaws as in they blew nearly every spot they tried. However, despite all the bad booking and bad animation, TOP FUCKING MAN was the star of this episode. His douchbag behaviour and the fitting end to him at the hands of Roll was glorious. He was the strongest booked guest robot master of all time (hell, Snake Man was buried twice in this episode for goodness sakes) and even at the end, he was in better shape than Dr. Wily was. I did also laugh at Cut Man losing to Karate Man in an ironic twist; but other than that, this was overall a good idea in theory, horrible in execution episode. I still think Sheepskin Deep wipes the floor with this episode, and it was also better animated too, by Wang Films, who can be horrible half of the time. So....
Thumbs down for this episode and I'll see you all next time.