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Twenty Years Of Muddy Puddles: Peppa Pig Series Three #4 Rant

Reviewed: 04/15/2018
Additional Commentary/Edited: 08/02/2024

Daddy Pig Is Stuck! Everyone Is Stuck!


Okay fans; I have now decided to rant on this series full time, because I do in fact like this show enough that I can handle the best and worst of the Pig family from Great Britian. We head back to Series Three as we start the next ten episodes of the Harley Bird era as the gloves are finally off of this show as it turns from just a normal pre-school show into a legendary pre-school show. So; how do these episodes fare? Let's rant on shall we..?!

All the episodes are done by Neville Astley, Mark Baker and Phil Hall. Animation is done by Astely Baker Davies animation; with the two mentioned creators and Phil Davies.


Hospital: Next up is episode #137 on the animation paper as we head to the basketball court with the hopstoch setup in the middle as all the kids minus Pedro Pony are running around in a disorganization fashion. Did Pedro Pony oversleep...AGAIN?! (2024 Gregory Weagle Says: Not this time and it's a lot more tragic.) This causes Peppa to fall flat on her kisser and scrape her left knee, even though her arms cannot reach the leg in order to sell it. Everyone is worried that she has injured her knee as Madame Gazelle has arrived to check on the injury. I was hoping she would give the dreaded "X" sign; just to make my dream dream comparison of wrestling to cartoons complete. Thankfully; it's only a scratch and we heal up Peppa's knee with Green Cross bacteria killer and put on a plaster (band-aid in North America) back inside the school. Peppa's all right as everyone sits down because Madame Gazelle is actually going to address the Pedro Pony being MIA. Here's a clue: When Gazelle is addressing Pedro Pony directly, Pedro is not late as Suzy think he is. You see; Pedro Pony is in the hospital. That fucking sucks! However; this will suck a bit less, because they are going to visit him in hospital as we head there and Miss Rabbit has bused them over. Gazelle tells the students to stay with her as everyone goes into the hospital; except for Miss Rabbit. Suzy is of course, wearing her nurse's outfit; because there has to be a spot where the nurses confuse Suzy with being a nurse. Isn't impersonating a nurse in hospital against the law?! (In Canada at least, it is illegal to impersonate a nurse under the impersonation law. Although you probably have to do something else illegal like assault along with it for the charge to actually stick.) Now; for those of you who love pointing out Miss Rabbit and her multiple roles: Witness Mr. Bull playing security in this hospital. (Problem is that Mr. Bull doesn't overkill this gimmick like Miss Rabbit does.) Yup; it's the dreaded ecomony of characters syndrome once again. (Well, that's one shoot way of describing the whole thing former self. Doesn't explain the overkill of Miss Rabbit's gimmick though.) Mr. Bull can take directions better than anyone in this episode; including the reviewer, which is me. Mr. Bull lets them on the lift -- elevator in North America -- and we go up. Somehow; this elevator can carry a 1000 pound bull with ease as we head to the children's ward; which is completely decked out with Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom references. (Mr. Bull probably weighes the same as Daddy Pig and Daddy Pig is not a thousand pounds. Sod off former self!)

Good thing Daddy Pig isn't here; because he would have panicked if he saw the dreaded wasp painted on the wall. (You might be right there, former self.) Suzy claims that Pedro will probably be asleep; which is a lie because Pedro is in bed wearing a blue shirt with a red star and sun. Suzy claims that Pedro doesn't look sick as Pedro shows that he broke his right leg and it's in a plaster cast. (Yes, he did say he broke his leg and it won't be the last time Pedro does this. I mention this because Peppa wasn't allowed to tease a broken arm in "Christmas At The Hospital" and had to say "bump her arm", which tainted the suspense of the episode that maybe Peppa broke her arm.) Peppa shows off her grazed knee and yes, even this has a zoom in shot. Don't ask, I'm not that sadistic. Pedro brings out the container of markers and everyone decides to draw pictures on the plaster cast. Danny Dog draws the worst soccer ball in history, someone draws a green parrot, someone draws Mr. Potato, someone draws a purple flower and Peppa draws the best one: A muddy puddle. Of course! Peppa then offers Pedro to draw something on her band-aid and Pedro draws a yellow flower on it. Hospital is great according to Pedro; he's probably the first one who truly enjoyed it. My hospital stay was all right, but it went on for 65 days and the fact that I was able to tolerate 65 days without internet access is something to behold. He also loves to annoy the staff by pushing the red button on the wall. Nurses get awfully annoyed at this even when it's something that needs to be done; let alone just because Pedro can. It's like with judges in court; don't annoy the nurses any more than you have to. They are humans too, you know. (TESTIFY~! One of the main reasons former self gave this episode a thumbs down.) Oh; and those things on Pedro's shirt are stickers. So, we head to the nurse's cafe room as at the table is Mrs. Fox and Mrs. Cow; which I believe are their offiicial debuts on this show. (Mrs. Cow has been shown in various appearances since Mr. Potato Comes To Town, but this is Mummy Fox's debut!) Judy Flynn voices Mrs. Cow (As well as Auntie Pig and Mummy Dog); but I have no idea who voices Mrs. Fox. (Same voice as Mummy Pig.) They are having tea and biscuits. I ask this because Mrs. Fox does in fact speak in this episode! They realize that it's Pedro and here comes Mrs. Fox into the children's ward. Pedro is complaining about an itch. Mrs. Fox tells him that if it's the leg, he has to endure it; but Pedro claims that it's his ear. A body part I can easily scratch.

You couldn't just introduce his friends to Mrs. Fox and then have Freddy Fox say hello to his mother?! (That would have been a neat segueway. Hell of a debut for Mummy Fox here!) In comes Miss Rabbit with the tray of meals as Pedro decides to have spaghetti and sponge pudding. Here's some advice for anyone who is in hospital and had the same surgery as I did: Do not order fruit as the main course. Always have high protein foods and milk. Protein helps in the healing process. Keep the fruit to a minimum. (Pedro's meal is okay, but having some meat would have made this a lot better.) Also; the food is not bad all things considered and it was one of the reasons why I wasn't pissed off. (Well, you go to the hospital to heal your body. Tastebuds are put on the back burner.) I also lost a considerable amount of weight during that stay and am now back to said weight writing this today. Oh; hello Doctor Brown Bear! (In an unique outfit that I rarely see him ever wear and probably should be wearing it as a doctor.) Pedro points at his ear and Doctor Brown Bear scratches it. Then the fire alarm rings; and apparently, it's the same bell they used when visiting hours are over. That's really stupid. Pedro waves farewell as the children and Madame Gazelle leave. I believe that is Mrs. Fox's longest tenure in this show by a mile. We head back to the basketball court as we run all over the place. Peppa then stops and kicks her left leg as the plaster has dropped from her knee. Peppa is like me when my packing falls off after healing at home. Thankfully; Peppa's knee is fully healed, so crisis averted. In comes Pedro Pony; so his leg healed in less than two days. (SUZY SHEEP~?!) Pedro proclaims that his leg is better than it was before. I call horseshit on this. See what I did there?! Pedro calls it a super leg; I call bullshit on this as well. When I came back from surgery; my right toes are always on pins and needles, since it was a complication from surgery. Pedro is basically using a form of "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger"; which is total bullshit. Pedro runs around and everyone runs around a circle giggling with Madame Gazelle as everyone loves to run around to end the episode at 4:30 approx. Pedro Pony was such an annoyance here; and the ending wasn't much better. ** (40%). (If I had never been in hospital in my life, I would have probably given this a higher rating and laugh off these antics of Pedro. However, I just cannot given my time there. The episode itself was okay otherwise, it didn't fall off a cliff until Danny Dog asked what it is like in hospital halfway through.)

Spring: Here is episode #138 on the animation paper as we begin this episode on the white house on the hill at the back door. A bunch of kids are hopping up and down with Grandpa "Confused Rules" Pig watches on. Peppa, Emily, Rebecca, George, Edmond and Richard are the ones hopping as the narrator informs us that we are going to have a chocolate egg hunt. So, there is a commericalized Easter promo in an episode that is about spring?! Huh. I thought spring was much bigger than just Easter?! (For context, this episode debuted in September 2010 in the UK. It was just sent out there to die.) Peppa is not ready because Freddy Fox isn't here. Oh; here he comes now in Mr. Fox's knick-knack van of doom. (Which apparently, this was an early production episode since the Fox logo with the Est. 2010 date is actually missing!) Yes; Mr. Fox does park on the steepest side of the hill. (Of course! Even scummy salespeople follow Peppa's damnable rules!) Mr. Fox and Grandpa Pig shake hands and it's a lot less awkward than Daddy Pig rowing a boat with Mr. Wolf. Sadly; as much as Mr. Fox loves egg hunts, he must take his leave elsewhere. Which he does. The kids get one of seven baskets give by Grandpa Pig and everyone must find those chocolate eggs; while avoiding stepping on his plants; because they are such delicate "humans in the eyes of Grandpa Pig" plants. Peppa promises to be careful; and I don't buy this for one second. Everyone scatters in various directions as Grandpa Pig returns to the backdoor with Grandma Pig carrying a tray of tea, milk and chocolate chip biscuits. Grandpa Pig proclaims that he had hid the eggs well and it will take ages to find them. Literally one second after he says that -- Peppa finds an egg in a potter's plant -- she has been watching Darkwing Dark episodes lately. (Grandpa Pig is our GEEK OF THE WEEK~!) Rebecca finds one behind a bush next to a yarn basket. Emily finds one while skipping in a tree branch; as she uses her trunk to get it. Freddy is sniffing around and finds an egg in a concrete fountain bowl. It's a bird bath by the way. The big kids all run up and show how terrible Grandpa Pig's hiding skills are. But wait; the little ones come up and couldn't find the eggs; because Grandpa Pig's hiding skills are sneaky against anyone under the age of 2 1/2. (That is so cruel of you Grandpa Pig!)

They stop in front of Grandpa Pig and then in a staggered fashion; they bawl their eyes out in stereo. (This is the first time Edmond Elephant has bawled his eyes out and the last little one to do so, until Robbie and Rosie Rabbit in Series Four!) And it's clear that the big kids love it when the little ones cry. What trolls?! Apparently; the three remaining chocolate eggs were with Grandpa Pig all this time, via the power of magic illuison and sparkle sounds. So, the narrator for Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom is Grandpa Pig?! That would explain the magic hat of doom; as if the voice didn't give him away. (Yes, David Graham is the narrator, because the narrator is Cedric Elf in that show! The show is 100 episodes long each running around 11 minutes and if I get the guts, I might rant on that show.) Everyone is happy, and that is that. Rebecca asks what do they do with the chocolate eggs. I would send them back to Grandpa Pig on the count of him having to cheat in order to make the little ones happy. Grandpa Pig of course wants them to eat the eggs and they all do, opening the wrapper and make their faces into a complete mess. Grandma Pig comes out and we laugh about chocolate eggs in tummies and also on their faces. The kids lick off the excess and Emily cannot tell a lie, Grandpa Pig sucks and blows at egg hiding. (Wow, former self saying the quiet part out loud.) The little ones are frowning as we then see everyone going down the hill towards the baby plants in the garden as Grandma is telling us about some new things debuting in the garden. Peppa doesn't call baby plants exciting, but it's not the baby plants Grandma Pig was talking about. It's the chickens and Neville the rooster that Grandma Pig is talking about as they head to the chicken coop. (Which means we have to remind the audience that the brown chicken is Jimima, which is considered a racist name in North America.) Freddy Fox asking if they can eat the eggs with Grandma Pig's reaction is really funny as the chickens eggs have finally started to hatch, and they are baby chicks now. POW! OUCH! Ummmm...Okay; they are little birds; but not related to Harley in anyway. The baby chickens hop out of the chicken coop as the kids are in the "Aw, my heart melted" mode and you just knew it's not only springtime that these chickens have hatched, but it's also time for the kids to cosplay baby chickens. Cheep! Cheep! Cheep! The kids then sing the "Cheep! Cheep! Cheep!" song and that ends the episode at 4:30 approx. The singing was good by the way and goes into the credits. This was fine. (I liked this more on the second viewing, having to hear a racist name aside, so *** 1/2 (70%).)

Miss Rabbit's Helicopter: Moving right along, here is episode #139 on the animation paper as we open at the Summer Fete -- which is basically all the stuff from Funfair -- minus the Helter Skelter and the Big Wheel. Which is understandable because the theme is all about rescue vehicles: like Granddad Dog's breakdown truck, Mummy Sheep's fire engine and Miss Rabbit's helicopter, which is meaning it's official debut on this show actually. (Mr. Labo is tending the Duck Hook game, so he didn't even get demoted after his horrible sexist comment on Mummy Pig in Funfair. Somethings never change. Mr. Bull is attending the strongman hammer bell game and Mr. Rabbit is attending to Miss Rabbit's ice cream vending spot! How about that for continuity?!) In comes the Pig family from the east as we see the rescue vehicles from Daddy Pig's point of view. Oddly; the narrator calls the breakdown truck, the pickup truck. I have seen pickup trucks, that is no pick up truck. So; the rescue vehicle owners make sounds as the fire engine uses the British sound because the North American sound sounds like Baby Alexander and that would be considered punching down on Baby Alexander. Never a good idea. (Worse, Baby Alexander is the next episode and someone in creative thought giving Baby Alexander a unique crying sound was a swell idea. It might have been if they picked literally any other kind of sound then the one they ultimately picked.) Miss Rabbit's helicopter beeps and is the only one that has voice acting. Mostly; "helicopter reversing". The kids are in awe as Miss Rabbit asks if they want to go for a ride and the kids love to. Mummy Pig, George and Peppa get into the helicopter and conveniently, Daddy Pig weasels his way out of this because the helicopter is full. Of course; his voice inflication indicates that he is still afraid of heights. Even the narrator isn't buying this, so you know it's bullshit. Daddy Pig watches on from the ground as the helicopter rises into the air and then Miss Rabbit decides to do stunts with the helicopter, including the Loop-De-Loop for only fifteen pounds, but it's for a good cause, honest! The kids love it; but Mummy Pig looks like she wants to be somewhere else. And if you listen closely; you can hear Daddy Pig laughing all the way to the bank. Or in this case, buying ice cream from Mr. Rabbit's ice cream trolly. HAHA! Daddy Pig loves the ice cream.

Mummy Pig wants to land the helicopter; but we get a voice on the radio yelling because there is an emergency in progress. (I believe this was Mr. Rhino speaking on the transmitter because it didn't sound like Mr. Bull.) Miss Rabbit turns around and heads to the road where the construction workers are digging up the road again, because another water main pipe needs to be replaced. This helicopter has a giant magnet; just like the recycling car crane used in Recycling and lifts the piece of pipe out of the ground. (By the way, guess who appears here: Mr. Labo in uniform despite being at the fete like literally seconds ago. SUZY SHEEP?!) Miss Rabbit flies off with it as Miss Rabbit has no idea where to put it. She's rescues people; not metal pipes! She decides to drop it into the middle of the road on a hill and then flies away. (Miss Rabbit wins GEEK OF THE WEEK honors!) Miss Rabbit offers a lift home; but Peppa wonders about Daddy. Yeah. Mummy Pig rings in Daddy Pig with the out of nowhere cellphone as we head to the duck hooking booth with Mr. Sexist Labo at the booth. (That's my story and I'm sticking to it!) Daddy Pig answers the phone after hooking a plastic duck. (This just exposes the logic break with Mr. Labo even more!) Mummy Pig informs him to get this own way home and Daddy Pig don't care. He cared more about Peppa's description of the helicopter stunts Miss Rabbit did and it seems Mummy Pig has mellowed out. Daddy Pig is the only one who has an official fear of heights. What a shocker?! Daddy Pig is dishonest. We jump cut to Daddy Pig driving up the hill and he is forced to stop because there is a giant fucking pipe in the middle of the road! Daddy Pig is not impressed with this, so even Miss Rabbit is doing Peppa's troll routine; except Miss Rabbit isn't doing it on purpose.

Daddy Pig decides to take the short cut and it's a muddy puddle ride as Daddy Pig's car cannot get out of a giant muddy puddle; allowing the narrator to gleefully say: "Daddy Pig is stuck." Trust me; this would not be the last time Daddy Pig is stuck on this show. (Ah, Simple Science is slowly drawing near. Get ready.) The car is sinking in the mud and Daddy Pig is screwed. He decides to ring up Granddad Dog to rescue him with the breakdown truck. Granddad Dog no sells because he has to get that damn giant metal pipe off the road. However; he is such a kind guy that he rings in Mummy Sheep and the fire department. I also love that Granddad Dog indirectly called Miss Rabbit "a maniac". I'm pretty sure that word is not allowed on most pre-school shows in North America. (Still, I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments!) Daddy Pig tries to speak with Mummy Sheep; but Mummy Sheep no sells because she is basically helping to get Tiddles The Turtle out of a tree....AGAIN! Because you see; the turtle's gimmick is that it loves to climb trees. Doctor Hamster makes her cameo and she is not happy with this gimmick. Even if I think it's funny since tortoises can in fact climb trees legit. (Although Tiddles is regretting it in this scene for once.) Mummy Sheep does defer the call to the highest rescue system in the land. Take one guess who that is. Yup; it's Miss Rabbit's Helicopter Service, which gives Miss Rabbit an excuse to grab Daddy Pig out of the muddy lake with her giant magnet. HAHA! Daddy Pig does not like this as the kids are cheering on cue. Peppa says it all and Miss Rabbit thinks it's time to show off the helicopter again and the visual of seeing Miss Rabbit doing the loop-de-loop for only 1.5 million pounds -- the cost of the lawsuit I'm sure Daddy Pig is going to file -- with Daddy Pig's car is so impossible and yet so funny. The episode ends at 4:30 approx with the narrator basically saying that everyone loves to go up and down and round and round in Miss Rabbit's helicopter. Close, but no concrete for you, Mr. Narrator. (Well, you can ditch the lawsuit because at the end of the episode before the credits, Daddy Pig is happy and has a chuckle. That kills the fear of heights gimmick right there and it's time to abort the angle. No surprise, they don't abort this angle.) This is the second best episode of Series Three at **** 1/2 (90%).

Baby Alexander: This is episode #140 on the animation paper as we head to the house on the hill as we head to the kitchen table with the kids doing nothing, Mummy Pig drinking tea and Daddy Pig reading the newspaper. The narrator tells us that Chloe is coming and it's not long either. Mummy Pig also mentions Baby Alexander and Peppa is already not liking this because babies are noisy; which is hilarious coming out of big kids who giggle and talk too much all the damn time. Daddy Pig is certain that this will be a fine visit and not be so noisy. Now; what I heard next is so funny at first because it sounds like a fire alarm siren in the background. I first thought there was an emergency in progess. (Not only that, the family in storyline thought the exact same thing I did!) Then eveyone walks out of the house; and we realize that there is no fire nor emergency, that's Baby Alexander crying like crazy. When Baby Alexander debuted in Series Two; at least his crying sounded like the little kids and it sounds wonderful. The creators decided that they wanted Baby Alexander's crying to be original and this is the sound they picked. One of the most annoying crying sounds I have ever heard. If you never seen this scene at first; it's really funny. However; once you have seen it and you know what is coming, it ceases being funny. (They changed it to George's cry in the latest episode involving Baby Alexander in the mainline series in Series Eight, and it sounds better in Peppa Pig Tales where Baby Alexander appears more often than the mainline series! Sadly, it means we have to hear the siren cry in the infamous "The Noisy Night" episode. Oh lord, that episode!) The green car arrives and out comes Auntie Pig, Uncle Pig, Chloe Pig and Baby Alexander Pig causing dogs to hound at a forty mile radius. Even better; they still do the meet and greet as Baby Alexander is crying; instead of calming him down first and then doing the meet and greet. (Regardless of me hating the new cry, the family ignoring the cry during the meet and greet was funny.) Yes, they are use to his crying. Auntie Pig brings the yo-yo star -- which it's design is way too good to be on this show; and this show is good most of the time-- and this calms down Baby Alexander. (You see, Baby Alexander's gimmick is that he love noise and hates silence. Kind of like a MAGAT actually.) Also; when Uncle Pig opens the trunk and takes all the stuff out; it looks like they are staying for a few days...but in reality, it's everything Baby Alexander needs for the day. This is sadly more accurate than anyone wants to give the writers credit for. I'm not going to bother listing the stuff Baby Alexander needs because we will be here all day.

Chloe blows off Peppa for thinking Baby Alexander can talk; so I believe this is the episode where Baby Alexander learns his first word. Peppa asks how they know what he wants and Uncle Pig proclaims that they guess. Also true. (Better question: "How can Baby Alexander learn those words if you don't say them?!" I would have love Peppa to say that, because while it's a troll move, it's a funny one and an honest question to boot?!) Baby Alexander starts crying again as Uncle Pig guesses that Baby Alexander is hungry. Auntie Pig asks if Peppa wants to help feed him; and Peppa agrees. This causes Baby Alexander to stop crying. That was funny, actually since it's one of the few times Baby Alexander goes silent without noise involved. We head to the kitchen as Baby Alexander is in his feeding chair with Peppa feeding him what appears to be squished bananas. Auntie Pig informs Baby Alexander that Peppa is doing the feeding today. Of course Baby Alexander no sells and refuses to open his mouth. Because Baby Alexander is like every other baby in existence, they love to troll on their adults for attention. Only, that works against them; but they are babies, what can they do?! Auntie takes over and we do the always dumb but cute "Here comes the airplane" routine and this easily works on Baby Alexander. (Aeroplane in Britian I should note.) I don't think this ever worked on me; but I don't remember 99% of my life from cradle to right now, so what do I know?! Peppa puts some extra zip on it and I do love how Baby Alexander teases not falling for it before falling for it anyway. I never hated Baby Alexander, I just hate the crying sound he makes and that's on the creators, not on the character. (Peppa says what I believe is the British expression: In free the doors!) Peppa is trying to get Baby Alexander to say "aeroplane"; but Chloe blows her off. Auntie explains that Baby Alexander has not said his first word yet. Peppa ponders over what her first word was and Mummy Pig and Daddy Pig all claim that they were the first words Peppa ever said. I betcha her first words were "muddy puddle". Peppa has that look of "you're both lying to me just to take credit". George's first word was "dinesaur" (sic) as everyone has a laugh; so chances are it wasn't either. Daddy Pig is amused by the mess of Baby Alexander. Uncle Pig proclaims that it's time for a splashie bath and that is exactly what the next scene entails: BA having a splashie-washie bath (I'm starting to enjoy British spellings now) with his rubber duckie. Lots of sponge bathing going on as well as the duckie squeaking and Baby Alexander giggling. (By the way, BS&P has tighten up the bath scenes as the water is now opaque instead of transparent, meaning no full nudity anymore.)

"Heh" is his first word, but since it's a sound; it doesn't count. Peppa splashes Mr. Dinesaur into the bath and wants him to say it. Baby Alexander responds by saying "goo goo". Goo is a legit word, but since he says it twice, it doesn't count as his first word. Man; the rules of first words are such bullshit. Chloe blows Peppa off and Peppa rightfully points out that he will speak words one day and they will know what he wants. Peppa deduces that Baby Alexander wants to go for a walk; but of course, Baby Alexander cannot walk yet. In it's place he takes a stroll in one of those buggies -- baby carriage in North America -- that folds up for easy storage as demonstrated backwards when Uncle Pig takes Baby Alexander outside. It also has mud guards, five gears and ABS standards. (Anti-Lock Breaking System in case anyone doesn't get the acronym.) Why five gears?! I can understand the ABS system and even the mud guards, but what?! (I corrected former self since Uncle Pig was mentioning five gears, not eight wheels. How former self made this obvious error is mind boggling to me.) Peppa is not impressed by this "blah, blah, blah" stuff. Then again; she thinks science is magic, so what does she know. (Actually, that's Suzy Sheep's gimmick. It's coming for real later on.) Oh; and Peppa and George remembered to put their boots on. Geez; I wonder the final spot is going to be?! Someone claims that Baby Alexander loves it when Peppa talks and Peppa claims that she is very interesting. (It was Auntie Pig saying it to Peppa, former self.) I don't think anyone will doubt that after seeing "The Golden Boots" anymore; but it's not for a great reason either. Everyone walks down the hill as Peppa shows Baby Alexander the sights and is trying hard to get him to say the words. Baby Alexander is giggling and saying goo-goo all the way, because he loves how Peppa talks, but also is trolling Peppa. Peppa then runs and finds a muddy puddle. DING! Peppa jumps up and down in that muddy puddle and she loves it; and apparently Baby Alexander is very giddy about it, too. Then Baby Alexander says "puddles", and that is his first word. I betcha it was Peppa's first word, too. I have more confidence in George saying "dinesaur" then Peppa saying "Mummy" or "Daddy". Everyone is happy as Baby Alexander says the word again. Then everyone except Auntie and Baby Alexander do the backsplash laugh to end the episode at 4:30 approx. (BS&P wasn't going to allow Baby Alexander to do the backsplash laugh for obvious reasons, but dammit; that would have been many buys!) Crying aside, this was a really good episode. *** 3/4 (75%).

Grampy Rabbit's Lighthouse: Last up for today is episode #141 on the animation paper as we head on the ocean in Granddad Dog's tugboat with Danny Dog, Peppa Pig and George Pig wearing lifejackets...but not Granddad Dog wearing one. We zoom in as Danny Dog wants to go to Pirate Island (the sandspit one, not the TaleSpin one) as Granddad Dog is okay with that; but there are supplies to deliver to the lighthouse to a friend of his. So, yes; this is Grampy Rabbit's debut as he comes out of his lighthouse and waves to Granddad Dog. (By far the greatest character on the show and he is going to get a mega-push the likes only Miss Rabbit has seen outside of Peppa Pig herself. He feels like a legit TaleSpin character and I'm noy hyperboling it either. He's kind of an elder version of WildCat Puma.) Grampy Rabbit is the only one who is wearing boots by the way. Granddad Dog docks the boat on the rock and jumps off, carrying the supplies to Grampy as Granddad Dog introduces the crew of kids; and Grampy is happy to see them as we zoom out to jackhammer the point home that he hasn't had visitor in many a moon and he's lonely. Peppa then asks when he has been here and Grampy says since Tuesday. HAHA! Tuesday about a month ago. (Grampy Rabbit just went into the hall of awesome!) Grampy wants to tell some stories as they do the old "democracy wins" spot where the kids want to hear the stories; but Granddad Dog doesn't. Grampy brings out his banjo and wants to sing a song and Granddad Dog loses in the "democracy wins" spot once again. Grampy Rabbit's song is okay I guess; but the kids singing in makes it so much better. (Grampy Rabbit's bad signing is awesome by the way.) I can just see Madame Gazelle and Grampy Rabbit singing in a duet now, that'll cause every other adult to get the hell out of this show and I will not care. (Memo to Series Eight creators: You can have that one for free.) Then Granddad Dog cuts him off by waving the cheese in Grampy Rabbit's face. What an asshole Granddad Dog is?! This song was actually starting to get good, too. Oh; and he gets "How To Work A Lighthouse" book. I betcha Peppa stole that from Grandpa Pig. Grampy Rabbit is fine with the gifts, even though he was cut off from giving us gifts. (Thanks for nothing, you Fuddy Duddy Granddad Dog! Captain Dog would have enjoyed his, if he wasn't an absentee dad in storyline.)

Peppa asks about the lighthouse and we get the grand tour of said lighthouse, complete with a stone spiral staircase and all the trappings of a regular lighthouse. Apparently; I didn't know lighthouse light had heavenly music playing when it is used. (I would like to yell Suzy's name here, but science can produce this if the lights are connected to a music box.) Also; Grampy Rabbit has a megaphone and basically screams "FOG" into it because he's the foghorn. Oh, man; if Captain Foghorn from Ducktales wasn't a big loser before, he still the hell is now. LOOOOOOSSSSSEEERRRRRR~! I betcha Grampy Rabbit could say that better than even I could. (No lies detected.) The kids love it, Granddad Dog hates it, because Grampy Rabbit is a weirdo that the kids don't care. (Now THIS is a weirdo! Weirdos are actually decent people, I will not stand for this ableist thinking! Predators are not weirdos, they are blood sucking parasites who cannot admit that they want to be the God of the bible, for if they do, they die.) Grampy Rabbit wants to continue the stories; but Granddad Dog cuts them off as everyone, but Grampy runs down the stairs, out of the lighthouse and onto the boat. Peppa is fine with leaving now; since there is Pirate Island to go to. Granddad Dog sails away from the island as Peppa and George say their goodbyes to Grampy; and then we see the sand island with the sand castle and pirate flag still on it from a previous episode I reviewed. The kids and Granddad Dog hop onto the island. Peppa comments about the sandcastle and they decide to play hide and seek. Then we get a "so stupid, it's funny" moment: There are two hiding spots available as Peppa and Danny hide behind the sandcastle. Granddad Dog closes his eyes and counts, as George cannot find a hiding spot until he decides to simply hide behind Granddad Dog, assuring that he wins this game. HAHA! After a count of five, Granddad Dog opens his eyes and finds Peppa and Danny within seconds; but he cannot find George because George is right behind him making sure Granddad Dog never sees him. Peppa and Danny are giggling; because this is so stupid it's funny. (Granddad Dog is our GEEK OF THE WEEK~!)

Granddad Dog stops and gives up. George goes "boo" to make sure he is found. HAHA! Granddad Dog decides to go home before it gets dark as everyone gets back on the boat. Granddad Dog pulls the lever (CLEVER CLOGS~!) and we sail westward as it is now officially HAPPY HOUR. Peppa is concerned about this; but Granddad Dog assures them that Grampy's lighthouse will show them the way. We head to the lighthouse with the lights on as we jump cut to Grampy Rabbit reading the "How To Work A Lighthouse" in bed in the bedroom we saw earlier. Grampy Rabbit yawns and only gets past the title before deciding to go to bed. That is not the stupid part. The stupid part is that the light switch he pulls (CLEVER CLOGS~! Not.) is connected to the giant lighthouse light because there is no lightbulb inside the bedroom; so that means the lighthouse light is out and thus no boats can see it. Peppa is confused as Granddad Dog brings out the cell phone of doom and rings in Grampy Rabbit's phone. Grampy answers the phone protesting this outrage. Hey; it's not their fault the lighthouse has only one giant light and it's the light they need, you goofy lover of cheese! Granddad Pig asks if he could turn the big light on and Grampy apologizes and turns it back on; complete with heavenly music playing. That music should be standard in every lighthouse. Then; the fog of doom surrounds the tugboat as Peppa cannot see the light anymore. Granddad Dog rings in Grampy Rabbit...AGAIN! Granddad Dog wants Grampy Rabbit to do his fog horn routine now and Grampy is happy to do that at least as he screams "THIS WAY HOME~!" in the process. The tugboat is guided away from the lighthouse in a westward direction as we cut to the dock with Mummy Pig, Daddy Pig and Mummy Dog waiting to pick up the kids. Everyone gets off as the kids and Granddad Dog recap the trip. Peppa wants to sing the song she learned from Grampy Rabbit. Granddad Dog says no; everyone else says yes -- including me -- and we sing to end the episode at 4:30 approx. Go yell at a cloud for all I care, Granddad Dog! That was a decent song that ran beyond the end credits! Fun debut for Grampy Rabbit to boot. **** (80%). (Grampy Rabbit is going to light banger episodes on fire on this show, I assure ye!)

Miss Rabbit's Day Off: We move on with episode #142 on the animation paper and the episode opens on Mummy Rabbit's hilly tunnel home as we zoom into the kitchen cave with Peppa, George, Richard, Rebecca, Suzy, Mummy Rabbit and Mr. Rabbit at the kitchen table eating carrots. The narrator informs us that there was a sleepover from the night before. Mr. Rabbit walks off for work, Rebecca and Richard are playing cars as Mummy Rabbit suggests to them to pick the toys up because someone could kill themselves via tripping and we don't want that to happen. (Apparently, Miss Rabbit has three official jobs in storyline: Super Market Clerk, Bus Driver and Ice Cream Vendor.) In comes Miss Rabbit as she has a lot of work to do and then she turns around and slips on Richard's toy truck and falls on her back. (By the way: Since former self ranted these episodes out of order, this is officially the first episode where Miss Rabbit is identified as Mummy Rabbit's sister and by proxy, the aunt of Rebecca and Richard Rabbit!) Somehow; she is selling her ankle; but has no signs of a back injury even though she landed square on the back. (Ah, I can see why former self didn't like this episode: The selling was horrible here.) Miss Rabbit insists that she hops to work, but Mummy Rabbit won't let her go to work in that condition, so she'll take her place. This is not a good idea. (All her jobs don't require her to walk. Sure, a bad ankle makes it a little more difficult, but overall not too bad. Besides, she landed square on her back and that would be a good reason to stay home since back injuries are far more serious than the ankle.) Rebecca is told to look after her aunt as Mummy Rabbit does a whiplash jump cut to the super market and heads inside as she takes over the check out counter as at the checkout, there is Mr. Fox, Mummy Dog, Mummy Pony and Mr. Rhino. Mummy Rabbit doesn't even try to act like Miss Rabbit and she has never worked a checkout counter before. Uh-oh! Mummy Rabbit's life is about to spiral out of control. (By the way, apparently; there is a currency in this super market called book tokens. I realized this while watching this a second time and former self ignored it the first time.) I think this was designed to point out that there is only one Miss Rabbit and she does all the work; and it's not Miss Rabbit and Mummy Rabbit working in tandem. Except the tandem thing is more believable. (Lesser sadder in hindsight, too.) We cut back to the sitting room with the kids helping Miss Rabbit to a chair with her leg propped up. Suzy is dressed up like a nurse. If there was any time to call Doctor Brown Bear; this would be perfect. (Ironically, Doctor Brown Bear was shopping in the super market earlier in the episode!) Anyhow; Suzy is pretending to be a nurse and telling Miss Rabbit to stick out her tongue, she sells it. (Does Suzy realize that you can be arrested and charged with impersonating a nurse?!)

The phone rings and Peppa answers it as it's Mummy Rabbit on her cell phone of doom ringing in food at the checkout counter. She is getting the hang of it now. However; this will take all day as Peppa remembers Miss Rabbit has multiple jobs. (Cameos: Mummy Bear and what appears to be Mrs. Donkey; but not from France.) We logically cut to the ice cream bicycle in the field as no one is at the bicycle, but Daddy Pig, Doctor Pony and Mrs. Fox are there. (Mummy Fox's second appearance on this show by the way.) Somehow, the phone rings and it's in the freezer with the ice cream, and Daddy Pig has to answer the rotary style phone. He's also wearing his soccer outfit as Peppa is blowing off Daddy Pig for running the ice cream shop! (Okay, that was funny. Peppa protesting this is hilarious!) Daddy Pig explains the situation and Peppa proclaims that Miss Rabbit is ill. Miss Rabbit even has a thermometer stuck in her mouth, despite hurting her ankle in storyline. (Despite landing on her back in storyline. This logic sucks!) Mr. Pony wants cherry with strawberry and pistachio as Daddy Pig has to run the store. Not only is there no cherry; but the ice cream has melted into soup, prompting Daddy Pig to pour it into an ice cream cone. No one is amused; but I am. Jump cut to Peppa dailing the telephone for Granddad Dog's cellphone and Granddad Dog agrees to drive the bus in Miss Rabbit's place. Okay. Granddad Dog gets out and gets into the bus containing Mr. Labo, Doctor Elephant, Mrs. Cow, Mummy Cat and Mr. Zebra. Granddad Dog drives the bus; but his cellphone rings and we jump cut to Mummy Sheep calling Granddad Dog because she needs resucing. Granddad Dog backs up the bus and apologizes for all this. HAHA! Chaos and mayhem ensues and that doesn't include the kids running in a circle banging drums, cymbals and blowing trumpets around Miss Rabbit. (Former self missed that the narrator was showing off the disasterous results of everyone else trying to help Miss Rabbit, calling it very hard. Cameos: Candy Cat, Freddy Fox, Emily Elephant, Daddy Cat, Mr. Bull, Mummy Zebra, Zoe Zebra, Zuza Zebra, Zaza Zebra.) Miss Rabbit wants to leave; but Suzy cuts her off and tells her to breathe, but keep still. In comes Mummy Rabbit, Granddad Dog and Daddy Pig with sympathy flowers. Miss Rabbit simply gets up and proclaims that she'll be in work tomorrow. Everyone admits that jobs are not easy and everyone except the twin sisters do the backsplash laugh to end the episode at 4:30 approx. The psychology of this was terrible and little of it was funny. This was a complete off day by everyone. (Stupid psychology aside, this had enough charm to be just an episode on the second viewing. ** 1/2 (50%).)

The Secret Club: We continue on with Episode #143 on the animation paper to Suzy's house on the hill. The house is purple in color with a swing and drooping tree beside it on the right side of the hill. Mummy and Daddy Pig's car arrives and yes, they park on the steepest side of the hill on the western side of said hill. Peppa jumps out of the car and runs down the opposite side of the hill. Suzy has a tent and Suzy Sheep is in front of it at the bushes, wearing a Lone Ranger black mask. We meet and greet; which makes this scene look awkward. (Yes, I removed the First Nations reference from the tent because it was a bigoted reference. It's just the same tent Pedro Pony would use in Series Four!) Peppa questions the mask and Suzy explains that she's in a secret club and doesn't want to be identified. This is not going to end well for Suzy. (I just love how Suzy is trying to admit that this is supposed to be a secret and Peppa don't care either way.) Peppa wants into the club; but Suzy claims that she must know the secret word to gain access inside. Peppa asks what the word is and Suzy claims that it's "Blabba Double" which confuses everyone, including the members of audience. (Daddy Pig Says: At least it's not "Daddy's Big Tummy!" this time. Those are awfully silly secret words! 2024 Gregory Weagle Says: Also, I corrected former self because it was in error, not because it was a bigoted reference.) Peppa repeats it and that's enough to get Peppa into the secret club. In comes Danny Dog on his bicycle with his blue flame helmet; and he sees Suzy right away. HAHA! In comes Candy Cat, Pedro Pony and Rebecca Rabbit on their bicycles; they aren't fooled by this either. (Methinks Suzy's secret club is far from being a a secure secret.) Peppa and Suzy sushes them because this is a secret club, which apparently is the least secretive club I have ever seen. We exchange notes and the secret word is now "Shalama Cookie"; and they all repeat it. (So much for being a hard club to get into, Peppa! This secret club is extremely sus at this point. Why did former self give this ** 1/2 again?!)

Peppa is confused by this; as Suzy explains that the secret word changes to keep it a secret, which is completely ineffective when you tell them the secret word. Yes, they are in the club. Danny wants to know what to do here and Peppa claims that they do secret things in secret. What secret things?! We all know you suck at doing secret things, as evident in Series One, Episode #13 of this show. Oh; and there are secret missions to go on as Pedro Pony has no idea what they are talking about. Join the club! (Pedro Pony: Clueless putz. That's all you need to know at this point.) The kids dare Suzy into a secret mission and she tries to weasel out of it by having Peppa do the secret. Peppa points out that Suzy has the mask on; so Suzy gives up and bails to get some biscuits. It's British for chocolate chip cookies in case anyone doesn't know. Suzy literally practices the fine art of not being seen towards the house. She goes into the house and into the kitchen. Mummy Sheep is reading a book at the table with tea as there are cookies on a plate on said table. (Mummy Sheep is reading Ezza Magazine, former self.) Suzy simply asks if she could have the cookies to her friends, saying please in the process. This is the worst secret spy ever. I was hoping Mummy Sheep would say no; but she doesn't. Suzy hops out of the house with the plate of cookies, then hides and then simply runs to the secret tent with the plate of cookies, completely killing the gimmick. They pop and Suzy tells them to shush, they pop softer and I can still hear it as normal. They have their cookies and Suzy concedes that only an adult saw her -- the one whom she asked for the cookies to begin with -- to Rebecca Rabbit. Then, Mummy Sheep simply walks to the tent and gives him a tray containing glasses and a pitcher of orange juice. HAHA! Worst secret spy ever, I was right! Suzy is in denial; but the friends all notice right away that Suzy basically blew their cover and Suzy blushes like Daddy Pig. Peppa is not happy with this at all as Mummy Sheep pleads with them to be in the secret club and the secret word is Picka-Needle-Noodle, which she repeats, so Mummy Sheep is in the club. The kids then all bail because here comes Mummy and Daddy Pig's car.

Out comes Daddy Pig as he walks down the hill; leaving Mummy Sheep to defend the secret club. This is not going to end well for Mummy Sheep as Daddy Pig asks what is new. Mummy Sheep blushes, backs up and blows the kids cover within seconds. The kids are moaning after this. Peppa decides to blow off Daddy and not allow him to join the club despite Daddy asking nicely; because he's an adult. Peppa is either an idiot; or she thinks Mummy Sheep is not an adult and she's a troll. I pick the former in this case. Peppa then tells Daddy to say the magic word. Uh-oh! I betcha it's "Daddy's Big Tummy". It has to be that; since the gimmick of the trolls is to point out how huge Daddy's tummy is. Amazingly; it's actually "papa-deedle-doodle-dum; which Daddy Pig repeats and he's in the club. I guess even the kids are tired of fat jokes at this point. Mummy Pig is casually walking in as Danny Dog points that out for us. Peppa tells Daddy Pig to follow her in secret; which is basically stalking if I'm not mistaken. Daddy Pig practices the fine art of not being seen; and Mummy Pig finds him within three seconds. I take it back; Suzy is not the worst secret spy ever. I'm so sorry for ever thinking that. Mummy Pig asks why he is behind a bush, Daddy Pig blushes and blows his cover. All while making moral guardians gasp in horror because it appears Daddy Pig might have taken a dump. I say this because that's my face everytime I have to take a dump. Everyone gasps in horror as Mummy Pig likes to join the secret club and Suzy realizes that this secret club is a complete waste of time; and decides to not have it a secret club after all. Suzy and Peppa call it the Everyone's Secret Club. This is like the Jungle Aces Secret Midnight Club in that it's totally oxymoronic. Everyone loves it and they do the backsplash laugh to end the episode at 4:30 approx. Okay; remind me never to let these furries into my secret club. Although Daddy Pig can be my shield any day of the week. (Okay former self, you are a cold hearted man in thinking that this was an average episode. I loved this episode on the second viewing as the kids and adults just cannot get out of their own way. Still, Daddy Pig being my shield is perfectly valid. *** 3/4 (75%).

Grampy Rabbit's Boatyard: Next up is episode #144 on the animation paper as we head to the river with Grandpa Pig on his blue boat at the wheel. Apparently; there are two tugboats and each has a log sticking out of the river which where they attach the anchor to each boat. The yellow car comes in with Grandma Pig driving it, and Peppa and George (with pirate's hat) in the backseat. The kids get out, already wearing their lifejackets as we are ready to sail. Polly is on the perch and has also made the trip. (However, the adults are still without lifejacket on I should point out.) Grandpa Pig tries to move the boat closer. However; Peppa distracts him, yelling that he is going to hit the big stick which Grandpa Pig claims it is a mooring post. The boat hits the log and somehow this causes the underbelly of the boat to create a large hole in it. I have a hard time suspending my disbelief over this. Grandpa Pig is literally channeling the knight from Monty Python as the boat is sinking into the river, because Grandpa Pig is dumb. (Who enables Daddy Pig every week, or so I am told.) Grandma Pig is yelling at him to jump off, but Grandpa Pig has to adhere to the toxic masculinity of a sea captain. Even though when the boat sinks to the ground; there's no way Grandpa Pig can even drown as the water simply comes up to his chest. (Yeah, no one is buying this crap. Once again, Grandpa Pig is out GEEK OF THE WEEK~!) Polly is on top of his head and Polly decides to stay with the Captain, like a total fool. In comes Granddad Dog with his breakdown truck and boat bed conveniently placed just for such an event like this. We meet and greet as if nothing had happened and we discover that Granddad Dog is going to Grampy Rabbit's boatyard for some repairs and yes; he didn't say "mend" here. Grandpa Pig asks if he can have his boat towed over there and Granddad accepts the terms. He also mocks Grandpa Pig's boat; just to get under Grandpa's skin again. Why are they best friends, again?! (It's like I'm watching Max and PJ from Goof Troop all over again. Also, Grandpa Pig protesting this outrage is so bad that he should just shut up. That's why he's geek of the week.) We get a sequence of using a tow rope hook to yank the boat out of the river and onto the boat bed at the back of the breakdown truck. (By the way, Granddad Dog's boat is written out by teleport. SUZY SHEEP~?!)

We head onto the boring road as Peppa asks about the boat yard and Grandma Pig explains it all. We head into the boat yard with a spring sound effect. Yeah. (That was due to the flag pole springing off the sign of the boatyard, former self.) Pan over to Grampy Rabbit waving and greeting everyone; because you can never have enough of Grampy. (No lies detected.) The kids come out to greet Grampy Rabbit as Grampy notices the hole and Grandpa Pig lies by claiming that someone drove it into a mooring post. He's lying because he omitted that he was the one who drove it into the mooring post after being distracted by Peppa's yelling. Grampy Rabbit falls for it as Peppa describes the scene for us and she doesn't even blame Grandpa Pig for it. Grandpa Pig is stammering like a stupid idiot. Grampy Rabbit starts measuring the hole in the boat and then we walk for a while with everyone. Grampy Rabbit claims that it takes years to mend a boat. When Peppa asks how long has he been mending them, he says, "years". That was dumb. He should have said "since last Monday". That would have been funny. (Sometimes even the best don't catch the humor so to speak.) There is a giant pile of junk in the middle of the yard, which contains lots of scrap metal to mend boats with. Grampy Rabbit calls it a gold mine; which Peppa calls rubbish. Of course! Grampy Rabbit begs to differ about this as Grandpa Pig is confused by this as well. Grampy Rabbit shows off his swimming pool doubling as a submarine dock complete with submarine hanging from a crane. Grampy Rabbit uses the crane and drops the submarine into the water and it fills with water as it sinks to the bottom; but doesn't come up. HAHA! Grampy gets out and goes to find a washing machine, as Peppa points out as Grampy rips a panel out and that is going to be used to mend the boat. Grampy Rabbit patches the boat hole and bolts it into place. I think it needs more bolts; but what do I know?! Next up is testing the boat as they slide the boat down the ramp from the boat bed into the sea and it floats perfectly. Grampy Rabbit acts like this is the first time this has ever happened. HAHA! We end this with Grampy Rabbit wanting to sing about the sea. The adults say no, Peppa and George say yes. Since Polly says nothing, the tie goes to Grampy singing anyway and that ends the episode at 4:30 approx. (By the way, it was 3-2 in favor of the adults, but Grampy rocks so screw democracy! The adults laugh afterwards, so it meant nothing in the long run.) This was really great in that Grampy Rabbit is such a clueless dolt. **** (80%).

Shake, Rattle & Bang: This is episode #145 on the animation paper as the episode opens at the school house on the hill as the music is getting intense now. (As in a lot of drums and cymbals.) We head inside as they show the stage in the background since playgroup is in session. Everyone except George, Richard and Edmound are here as Madame Gazelle informs them they are going to play musical instruments that shake, rattle and bang. In other words, lots of noise will ensue. Everyone goes into the music room to find some musical instruments that fit Madame Gazelle's description. I hope Pedro chooses the guitar and then smashes it like a rock star. Sadly; he chooses the tambourine. (Well, he couldn't pick the guitar because that is Madame Gazelle's instrument. Although smashing it would be many buys because kids like seeing things destroyed, you see.) Danny Dog chooses the bongo drums, Peppa has the bass drum, Freddy is on triangle, Rebecca has cymbals, Suzy has a bodhran, an Irish bongo drum with a two way drum stick. (Corrected former self's clear misspelling of the device.) Yes; Gazelle does demonstrate the instruments; which is good since I have never seen a bodhran until this show actually. Candy Cat has a Gurio, which is a colorful wooden ice lolly-equse device with two holes that you scrape with a stick. It's also from South America. Zoe has the maracas, which come from her holiday in Spain. (Considering that in storyline, she is a former rock star, it makes sense for her to collect musical instruments all over the world.) Freddy Fox shows off the triangle. According to Freddy, they come in boxes in ten and she doesn't have to go on holiday; which Gazelle tells him that she'll remember that. Something tells me Freddy shouldn't have went there as Emily is on castanets. Which are sold by Mr. Fox in boxes of five as Gazelle cuts him off before the jokes become more than just jokes. Oh; and Gazelle does a dance; but assures Emily that she doesn't have to do the dance. Sorry; but the dance is what makes playing the castanets worth it. Ask Rebecca Cunningham from F'reeze a Jolly Good Fellow about it.

Rebecca blushes playing cymbals as we head on stage with the kids. Gazelle is counting down; but Peppa cuts her off instantly, finishes the ready, steady, go part and everyone plays like crazy. Peppa Pig; musical troll. Gazelle yells at them to stop because this is all noise. That music is all about listening to each other and keeping in time. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! That's a good one. It's 2018; what did you expect?! (Madame Gazelle is sounding like an actual musical oppressor, if you know what I mean. I'll get my coat...) Danny Dog is confused as we do a long sequence of hand claps to demonstrate timing and it's still off key. On second thought; the troll music was better. In comes the adults and it's Mummy Sheep, Daddy Cat, Daddy Pig, Mr. Fox and Mr. Bull. Wait; who is Mr. Bull picking up today?! (I would love to say this is a goof, but since Mr. Bull is responsible for the mending of the roof, I'm guessing he's here to inspect the school. No need to yell at Suzy Sheep here, this makes sense.) The kids have their "Shake, Rattle and Bang" concert and I'm sorry; but the troll music is still better than this. The parents pop anyway as Madame Gazelle orders the adults to go into the music room and bring out instruments. Daddy Pig brings out the complete drum set; while the remainder are forced to break the rules of this episode by bringing out a saxophone, tuba and small trumpet. Daddy Pig's drum skill are vastly better than Peppa's because he's a bit of an expert on these things. Gazelle brings out her electric guitar and we play the ending theme song for a while as Daddy Pig finishes with an over-the-top flourish. Peppa says it all as more playing ensues to end the episode at 4:30 approx. That music is great; but the chaotic noise was still the best because Peppa Pig is such a troll. *** 1/2 (70%).

Champion Daddy Pig: Next up is episode #146 on the animation paper as we head to the house on the hill and zoom into the sitting room with the Pig family as they are watching Mr. Labo set a new world record in the long jump. It's sport in Britian and sports in North America. The announcer is Mr. Potato on the microphone of course and Mr. Labo wins a trophy in the sexist Olympics. It is the smallest trophy they could find as Peppa asks what is a world record. Mummy Pig explains that it means you are the best in something; unlike professional wrestling where you claim to be the best, when you got in via politics. (Ooooooo, what a sick burn by former self there.) Daddy Pig shows off the Peppa Pig version of the Gunniess Book of World Records and it shows Mr. Reindeer is best at running (A character we have not seen until now actually), Mrs. Mouse is best at the high jump (A character we have not seen until now actually. No, it's not Mummy Mouse.), Mrs. Hippo is best at swimming (Wait; I thought Madame Gazelle was the world champion in this?! Oh; another character we have never seen until now.), and Daddy Pig is the best at muddy puddle jumping. Of course! He is even in the book of world records. Even Peppa thinks this is BS; but it's not. At least not for the next minute or so. Because you see, the next event on Mr. Potato's World Wide Sport is Monsieur Donkey in the puddle jumping event and the big splash is enough to set the world record! The jackass beat the fatass! POW! POW! OUCH! OUCH! Ummmm... Monsieur Donkey smiles in the muddy puddle holding the trophy. Daddy Pig cannot believe it because as Peppa proclaims, he's not champion anymore. Keep in mind: Daddy Pig claimed no one would beat the record, even though the entire storyline is building towards Peppa Pig setting the world record and becoming the champion. (Man, if only they pulled the actual trigger on that one and not have 14 kids beat one adult with the referee allowing it.) Peppa claims that everyone will be sad as Daddy Pig tells her not to worry; because no one will care about him not being champion anymore. (You see, Daddy Pig is a retired puddle jumper.) Daddy Pig has never watched professional wrestling before because there is a ringing of the door bell. (In professional wrestling, no one alive adheres to the stips of retirement, except Jesse Ventura.)

Daddy Pig opens the door and everyone comes out protesting the outrage of Daddy Pig not being champion anymore and wants Daddy Pig to make his comeback in muddy puddle jumping. They will care, Daddy Pig. Guess who is the most vocal about this: Madame Gazelle. (Cameos: Miss Rabbit, Mr. Rhino, Mummy Cat, Mr. Zebra, Mr. Bull and of course the sexist one, Mr. Labo.) Notice Mr. Labo is already there minutes after he won in the long jump. (SUZY SHEEP~?! Also, why do I think this is like an anti-French thingie with the English speaking adults basically not accepting a French puddle jumper like Monsieur Donkey. USA! USA! USA!) Everyone thinks it's important as Daddy Pig proclaims that he will do the event tomorrow. Mr. Bull calls Daddy Pig the master of muddy puddle jumping as Peppa, George and Daddy Pig head down the hill for training as Daddy Pig stops and comes into meditation mode because he must become one with the puddle. (Why do you need stereotypical Japanese music for this?! Why show?!) Peppa is rightfully confused as Daddy Pig proclaims that he must think like a puddle to jump into one. Daddy Pig simply walks back uphill because he has to sleep and dream of the puddle. Peppa and George are confused and we head back to the house on the hill as the sun rises. The car is ready as the entire Pig family comes out. Daddy Pig's muddy puddle costume is just daring a giant middle finger to the United States flag. (Ah, the Kurt Angle Olympics effect in a British show, how very nice, how very evil.) He is also barefoot; which is bad because the first rule of muddy puddle jumping is to always wear your boots. Oh; this means that this is the debut of the famous golden boots and these are the real golden boots. Not the fake ones Peppa was wearing in the Golden Boots special. Mummy Pig of course, thinks the golden boots are such BS that she gave them to Grandpa Pig for his garden and Daddy Pig is shocked and appalled by this. And who says Mummy Pig cannot play a little troll on Daddy Pig?! Oh; and they are being used as gardening boots. Mummy Pig claims that the green boots are fine; but Daddy Pig stomps his foot down and this is not acceptable. (Geez, I wonder why?! Peppa failed to win clean with ordinary yellow boots, so I guess those Golden Boots are magic. No wonder Suzy Sheep has been ribbing him in this show!)

We jump cut to inside Grandpa Pig's shed as his cell phone rings. Grandpa Pig answers the cell phone and Mummy Pig asks about the golden boots and we finally see them, as planters for his tomato plants. HAHA! And it's clear that Peppa's Golden Boots were fake because these golden boots have a five pointed star in a white circle logo on them. They have to be the real Golden Boots; which is sad because if the writers had a clue; they would have Peppa wearing those boots. Then again; this is the same writing team who wanted Peppa to go to the moon to see Miss Rabbit's gift shop on the moon and then booked 14 kids to beat Doctor Elephant in the muddy puddle competition; so I'm no longer shocked and just move to appalled at this point. (But, but, if Peppa wins clean, the series is over! Despite the fact that the show is making huge bank anyway. Staleness is a problem, a clean finish is not going to solve nor contribute to that issue.) Mummy Pig wants the boots for the puddle jumping competition. Grandpa Pig is all right with this and we head to the muddy puddle on the hill with balloons, tents and lots of people. West Crowd: Mrs. Cow, Doctor Brown Bear, Mummy Pig, Peppa Pig, George Pig, Mummy Pony, Mummy Sheep, Mummy Fox, Freddy Fox, Mr. Bull, Monsieur Donkey (The current puddle jumper champion!), Daddy Fox, Grandma Pig, Cousin Chole, Daddy Cat, Mr. Labo (The current sexist and long jump champion!), Candy Cat, Mummy Elephant, Emily Elephant, Edmond Elephant, Miss Rabbit, Danny Dog, Doctor Hamster and the debut of Belinda Bear. No Mummy Rabbit. East Crowd: Mummy Bear, Mr. Zebra, Mummy Cat, Doctor Elephant, Mummy Dog, Didler Donkey, Suzy Sheep, Mr. Rabbit, Granddad Dog, Not Daddy Cat, Not Mummy Bull, Uncle Pig, Grampy Rabbit, Mademoiselle Donkey, Madame Gazelle (with balloons), Mummy Zebra, Zoe Zebra, Zuzu Zebra, Zaza Zebra, Pedro Pony, Rebecca Rabbit, Richard Rabbit, the debuting Simon Squirrel, and believe it or not, Rohan Rhino who wouldn't officially debut until the Holiday Cruise in Series Eight! No Auntie Pig. Also; anyone who is thinking Mrs. Cow is Mr. Bull's beloved might want to rethink that because there was a brown bull in a purple dress in this shot crowd as well. (Time to walk that one back, former self. It's official! Mr. Bull and Mrs. Cow are married and a couple. More on that in Series Eight, when I get to start ranting on the new episodes!)

Even more interesting: Monsieur Donkey, the one who set the world record is here along with Didler Donkey and Mademoiselle Donkey; but no Delphine Donkey. Daddy Pig walks in barefoot in the GMF USA flag costume. Again; the crowd shot continuity dies as Mr. Potato comes in the most uncomfrontable car he could find. (Let's add Mr. Rhino to the list of cameos former self.) Doctor Elephant and Mr. Rhino seem to be here to take photos of the event. Mr. Potato goes over to Daddy Pig; asking about them lucky boots and Grandpa Pig finally runs in and gives him the boots. Daddy Pig sniffs the boots and claims it smells like tomatoes. Still better than what George smells in your slippers, Daddy! Daddy Pig puts on the boots; off-screen as Mr. Potato preps the crowd up. Time to do the secret art of puddle jumping as he must think like the puddle and be like the puddle. Then he yells, jumps high into the air in a way no one with Big Baby Daddy's weight could ever perform -- unless it's Baloo doing backflips in The Road To Macadamia -- and lands on the ground; making the muddy puddle literally disappear. I say he has the world record now. Surprisely; none of it splashes on Mr. Potato; but it lands on everyone else though, except Daddy Pig. Half of the crowd disappeared when this happened, too. (That is some powerful mud there. SUZY SHEEP~?!) The narrator proclaims that everyone has become one with the puddle; except for Mr. Potato of course. Cheeky potato bastard! Everyone except the two cleanest anthros in the room do the backsplash laugh. Daddy Pig accepts his new trophy as Peppa Pig comes in and declares that one day, she'll be the muddy puddle jumping champion of the world. So, after almost three series worth of episodes seeing Peppa Pig being normal; there is now a stake Peppa wants in this show and the show has become infinite times better because of it. Too bad the writers screwed it up in the end; but the thought was certainly there. Daddy Pig claims that he was training her. Peppa invokes the first rule of puddle jumping and smiles; allowing everyone to laugh at and with her to end the episode at 4:30 approx. Well; you have to start somewhere and since she's only four, what can you do? I loved this episode a lot more than The Golden Boots. **** 1/4 (85%).


THE REVIEW LINE

Well; this was the best set of shorts in Series three with Miss Rabbit's Helicopter being so awesome, Grampy Rabbit's debut being great in both episodes he was in and Champion Daddy Pig was done so well, it's a shame that the Golden Boots ended up being such a letdown. Hospital was not good and Pedro was an ass in that one; although it's mostly due to my experience in hospital more than anything else. I did like the elevator spot though, so there you go. Baby Alexander would have been a thumbs up if I didn't have to hear his wailing siren cry and the rest was the typical fun enough episode. The Secret Club also deserves an honorable mention just for everyone looking like geeks for my pleasure. Next up is the final eleven episodes of Series Three of Peppa Pig and hopefully I can get through them this time around. So...

Thumbs up for Grampy Rabbit's Lighthouse, Miss Rabbit's Helicopter, Champion Daddy Pig and Grampy Rabbit's Boat Yard. Thumbs down for Hospital, thumbs in the middle for everything else and I'll see you all next time.

 

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