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Twenty Years Of Muddy Puddles: Peppa Pig Series Eight #2 Rant

Reviewed: 11/17/2024

Probably The End?! Nope!

Okay fans; I have now decided to rant on this series full time, because I do in fact like this show enough that I can handle the best and worst of the Pig family from Great Britian. Time to resume Peppa Pig as this is officially the eighth series in the last twenty years or so. YAY! Or maybe not! Next up is ten more episodes featuring clouds, Grandpa having a robot, some games with paper, Mr. Bull deconstructs a river, a takeaway at the clubhouse, walkie-talkies confusing the cops, Peppa having an office, a hurt bird called Swift and two episodes featuring the official debut of Granny Sheep officially moving in with the Sheep family! YAY! How do these episodes fare? Let's rant on shall we..?!

All the episodes are done by Phil Hall with select episodes done by Matilda Tristam and Jen Upton. Jen started with Fireman Sam in 2008 as a writer and supervising producer. Other work includes: Funky Fables, Noddy In Toyland, Gaspard and Lisa, Blood Spirit, Wildwoods, Nella The Princess Knight, Bottersnikes and Gumbles, Chip & Potato, Milo, Pip and Posey among others. Yukee and Isadora Moon are the recent credits. This person has 20 writing credits to the resume. Matilda's resume is The Conservatory in 2009 as a writer. Then worked on The Adventures Of Abeny and Teal, Sarah & Duck, Olobob Top and The Epic Adventures of Morph. Teletubbies Let's Go is the most recent credit and is planning to write for Big Lizard in future. That's all. Matilda's been writing Peppa Pig episodes since Series Six I should note. Animation is done by Karrot animation.

Grandpa's Robot: This episode is #382 on the animation paper and the episode opens at the white house on the hill as Daddy Pig has arrived in his car with Peppa and George in tow. Yes, even Daddy Pig is parking on the steepest side of the hill, AGAIN~! Out comes Granny Pig for the meet and greet, and George still calls her "Ganny Ig". Peppa and Granny exchange notes for a while as the guise of this is that Grandpa Pig is in the shed making something. The kids and Granny Pig head down to the shed as Grandpa Pig comes out and tells them to be amazed by his latest invention. The invention walks out as it's a robot that is as bad as Grandpa Pig actually. It's basically a yellow trash can with feet and claws. It might as well be the robotic version of the Creature, judging by the bolts on it's neck. Granny Pig is impressed, I'm not since it looks like an oversized MEL from Bullethead Baloo and I don't like where this is going. The robot can only say "hello" over and over again, this does not help my confidence any. It's job is to help with the garden and the house. The robot can also change it's eye color from red to blue on command, this does not help my confidence any. Grandpa Pig orders it to lift something to demonstrates it's heavy lifting abilities. So, the robot picks up Grandpa Pig off his feet by the belly instead. HAHA! I like this robot now. Peppa is amused by this as Grandpa Pig orders the robot to put him down. Since this is a pre-school show, Grandpa Pig can only take a bump on his ass on the way down. That line annoys me when anthros are involved because they are part animal and thus "put me down" sometimes can be constructed as "kill me". Grandpa Pig opens the trash can with feet to reveal the wiring and there is a remote control of buttons to press in order to re-wire the robot's brain. I don't think this is going to end well for Grandpa Pig here. Somehow, the wiring causes such interference that Grandpa Pig cannot close the lid properly on the robot's head. Granny Pig decides to ask if anyone wants some orange juice. My guess is that apple juice would get complaints from parents that it looks like beer and toddlers cannot tell the difference. I mention this because apples are more native to Britian than they are to Canada or the USA. To be fair, there is truth to that. When I was six years old, I couldn't tell the difference between wine and Sprite soda pop; and had such a horrible experience that I was scared of alcohol for the rest of my life. Do not do this with your kids, parents. It's too dangerous, and my experience was unintentional.

Anyhow, Granny wants the robot to carry the tray as Grandpa Pig is adjusting the robot some more and struggling to close the head lid. Grandpa Pig flat out says that the robot is not ready for this -- thus proving that this robot is sus --, and Granny Pig calls him a "fusspot". Granny Pig bails to get the orange juice ready as Peppa asks what the robot can also do. Grandpa Pig orders the robot to get a spade from the wooden shed. By the way, the shed door is present despite being open the entire time. SUZY SHEEP~?! Robot breaks down the door like a Mister T clone and returns with a spade. I should note that a spade is used to cut through and scrape soil while a shovel scoops it up. It's not as problematic as you would expect. This robot digs like Danny Dog, only with one arm and much faster. Even Grandpa Pig is surprised by this. The robot continues to dig a hole to bury itself as Peppa is amused by this and Grandpa Pig tells the robot to stop, lest it digs all the way through the crust into the magma. That would suck, no one wants a volcano in the backyward. Peppa asks how to get the robot out and Grandpa Pig orders the robot to dig itself out and it does by digging to the right and destroying a garden of leafy plants instead of to the left where it wouldn't have damaged anything. There is a lot of rocks presents on the ground as Granny Pig calls for the orange juice. Granny Pig of course does a better job commanding the robot what to do and the robot obeys exactly as intended, shaking beakers of juice on the tray aside. Grandpa Pig is our GEEK OF THE WEEK~! They drink their juice from the glasses as Granny Pig notices the two holes and realizes with that stare that this robot creator is extremely sus, if you know what I mean. The fact that Grandpa Pig is so proud of this makes it even more so. Peppa confessing is par for the course. Granny Pig is interested in it tidying the house as we get a shot of inside the sitting room which is totally clean. Grandpa Pig realizes that he is screwed, so he says it's not ready yet. However, he agrees to command the robot to clean up the shed. Bad move there, you steamed ham! The robot goes into the shed and literally throws out everything, including the computer with broken monitor, like a Wuzzle throwing out stuff. Yeah, that was a total backfire. Grandpa Pig pretty much says it all as Peppa is amused by this. Peppa thinks this is the best robot ever as everyone does the backsplash laugh while the narrator says it to end the episode at 4:30. What was that metal banging sounds in the background?! Anyhow, a really fun episode as even the robot was laughing while doing the worst backsplash laugh ever. *** 1/2 (70%).

Paper Games: This episode is #383 on the animation paper and the episode opens at the school house on the hill. We zoom in to see the kids laughing at their craft tables getting ready to do some paper games. Gigi Gazelle is on the ready in case anything that BS&P wouldn't allow a kid to do can get done by the adult. Absent: Richard Rabbit as usual, The Panda Twins as usual, The Zebra Twins as usual, Rebecca Rabbit, Candy Cat, Gerald Giraffe, Penny Polar Bear, Lottie Llama, and Wendy Wolf. I should note that I didn't include Rohan here because Rohan hasn't been confirmed to be a permenent residence of the show just yet. That is coming very soon. It's 9 AM on the clock and Molly Mole makes a rare appearance here. Gigi shows off her folding skills on a newspaper and makes a paper hat. I'm guessing that newspaper is also made of tinfoil, since she has to hear my conspiracy theories on her being a legit vampire, or worse, a legit Juralian alien. The kids all do slow claps on that one. I should note that the hat is clearly in front of the horns, so that solves the mystery of the wedding hat Gigi will wear on Mr. Bull's wedding day. Gigi then refolds and creates a paper boat, or a newspaper boat made of tinfoil. Wonder if the later will sink? Hmmm, maybe I should do some "simple science" when I give a damn in future. More slow claps as Molly Mole wraps the newspaper to make a tree. Gigi claims that it's a tree without leaves, because it's clear she wants to do no work because Molly then proclaims that a grown up has to use scissors to make the trees. It's not Molly's fault that BS&P thinks scissors in children's hands is evil. Just cut the leaves Gigi, you are a grown adult even if you are a vampire. Gigi cuts lines on the top of the newspaper and then Molly pushes up the newspaper pages to create the tree with leaves. That was fun, BS&P fingers in the pie notwithstanding. Gigi calls this the best thing she has ever seen in her life and Edmond looks at the hard camera basically saying "can you believe this bullshit?!" The fact that Molly is doing the teeth smile really helps Edmond's case here during the slow claps. Next up is "Head, Body, Legs" according to Pedro F'N Pony. I don't think I need to explain this one as it just writes itself. Basically draw a funny anthromorphic being with crayons. One draws a head, a second one draws the body and the final one draws the legs, always fold when you are done. Remind me to never allow these kids to keep a secret, they can sink ship with those loose lips on command, if need be. Even Gigi is tells them to kindly stop talking. When they are done, the kid has to call it anything they want. Uh-oh!

Peppa then reveals a drawing with Mrs. Duck's head, a coconut body and human feet, and declares it Madame Gazelle complete with sad horns. Pedro Fucking Pony has done it again and his partner in crime Peppa Pig are complete trolls. The fact that the narrator is playing along along with Gigi indicates that they are complete fools and I snicker loudly. Suzy teeth smiles to say that it's a self-photo of Gigi. Very rich there, Suzy. Now, doing this once would be silly enough, but I betcha the funny drawings are all Gigi Gazelle. I check the video...Oh, you naughty little anthro kids! I'm not going to bother showing most of these, they all are silly. Mandy Mouse's at least looks slightly classy as all the kids giggle at Gigi's expense. Somehow, I can imagine Gigi vampire powers would include morphing into stuff if that is the endgame for this character. However, this was all done to waste time, so let's move on to the next paper game. Which Gigi Gazelle proclaims that it's images that move. For those kids who don't get the obvious yet, it is called animation. Which is exactly what I'm watching right now. Heck, there is such thing as "forsenic animation". However, that uses computers and reality. This is the classic hand drawing of animation which Tooneguy would have a boner if Peppa Pig was made in the 1990's. Gigi Gazelle demonstrates this by drawing a stick figure running at literally two frames per second, like Badly Drawn Animation Man, not two frames per minute like that Totally Tasteless Video of this character claims. Gigi does the slow pronouncation of the word animation and then we start animating. Pedro animates a blue bird flapping it's wings at two frames per second. Mandy Mouse's spotty ball animation looks awkward, probably to show how easy it is to not get the positioning right to make it believable. Hint: The bottom ball looks like an egg, despite real balls keeping their shape. Suzy is trying to detail the hell out of her purple dragon animation as she sees this as hard work. Gigi proclaims that it takes patience to do this and then looks at the hard camera, which is basically her giving sympathy to the animators. Why not?! These characters can clearly hear the narrator speak on this show. Peppa of course has animation of her jumping up and down in muddy puddles. DING! Peppa loves paper games, everyone loves paper games as Gigi has her newspaper hat on and a drawing of her "funny drawing". Everyone laughs to end the episode at 4:30. The middle of this was insulting, but the opening and the finish was great, so *** 1/2 (70%).

Clouds: This episode is #384 on the animation paper and the episode opens with a totally white title card and on the boring road. The Pig family is in their car heading east as the kids are giggling. They are using the seaside music in the background because this is the cue for Peppa to invoke the TEDDY RUXPIN SONG OF DOOM within seconds after the narrator ends his opening narrative. Everytime Peppa sings, it sounds like she's taunting the theme of the episode. They arrive at the beach and we get the funniest logic break I have ever seen: They are in their regular clothes in the car. The second they jump out, they are in their swimming costumes. Granted, Mummy Pig wearing a two piece costume hides the obvious, but Daddy Pig's shirt is literally written out by teleport. SUZY SHEEP~?! This is Kit Cloudkicker making his hat disappear level of magic here. They talk about the sun for a while as Mummy Pig puts sun cream on in the face just to annoy me. At least she aimed for the mouth instead of the eyes this time, which is a small improvement. Peppa is also a bit of a sadist to think this is fun. In comes a small cloud as Daddy Pig proclaims that everything is all right because the chances of one little cloud covering the sun...turns out to be non-zero after all. HAHA! Daddy Pig is the GEEK OF THE WEEK, but you know what, I'm glad because I don't like the sun. It can give me cancer, although that is still a slightly better fate than having a god unconditionally love you. Mummy Pig then points out that the sun will come back once the cloud moves away. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I wanted eternal shade and that cloud didn't give it to me. It needs to be kicked. I wonder who is the expert on that?! Wink! Wink! Nudge! Nudge! Daddy Pig decides to go into the ocean for a swim and he is of course hating the water being cold. To be fair, even a swimming pool indoors can be cold at first, so it's not limited to the sea. Daddy Pig overdramatically sells the cold despite not selling at all when they went to the South Pole in Around The World With Peppa. SUZY SHEEP~?! A bigger cloud arrives to really ruin their day and make my day better. The narrator is really making Daddy Pig look like a geek here because if the water is already cold, it's not really going to get colder by clouds covering the sun in real life.

Daddy runs out of the water as we get one of my favorite spots that never grows old: The family then pats him down with towels. I always loved that spot. Sadly, this needed funny music to really accent it, but I'm so happy to see them incorporate this spot into the modern show again. The cloud bails stage left and I need it to be kicked like the little cloud. I wonder whom I can call to do that?! Peppa and company waves goodbye and Daddy Pig doesn't want it to come back. He adores his kids, but hates clouds. Screw him, then. Not for adoring his kids, but his hate of clouds means he hates nature and hating nature is akin to hating reality. You create gods that way. Peppa asks about clouds and Mummy Pig demonstrates what they do with a cartoon cloud with a face on it, like a Super Mario Brothers cloud. It also rains. This leads to Peppa cosplaying a cloud, singing about clouds and taunting them. This causes George to bawl on cue. Normally I would be annoyed because George had no real reason to cry, but the payoff to this was glorious: Daddy and Peppa proclaim that George is the best cloud ever because he cries like a rain cloud. A great analogy, although my analogy of him crying like a shower head is a better one due to the crying angles. George feels better as Peppa sings and the kids cosplay clouds for a while, using an imagination sequence of Peppa being the red cloud and George being the blue cloud. The imagination clouds rain on the parade and the kids giggle. Daddy Pig doesn't like where this is going, because here are the storm clouds to block out the sun. The power of unsettled weather around these parts. Mummy Pig doesn't like this either and Daddy Pig thinks he has a hope chest. I have seen his chest, there is no hope; because the rain falls. Even nature thinks Daddy Pig should keep his mouth shut. Everyone runs back into the car, which this has music as the family puts up the roof, of course nothing is wet inside the car before this. SUZY SHEEP~?! The family sings the "It's Raining" song and it's fully intact! Even the violent bump to the head was kept in the lyrics! Wow! I thought they would edit that part out. The rain finally stops and you know what is coming here without me saying it. I check the video...Damn, I'm so good. It's time to do the earthquake ritual as the narrator says it all to end the episode at 4:30. This is the usual Peppa Pig love in, although the self-awareness with George crying was funny. *** (60%).

Mr. Bull Digs Up The River: This episode is #385 on the animation paper and the episode opens on the boring road with Grandpa Pig driving the yellow car with Peppa and George in tow, which is a rarity on this show. The narrator explains that they are heading for a day on the river on Grandpa Pig's boat. We exchange notes for a while as Mr. Labo yells "stop" because the deconstruction workers are working on digging up the road...AGAIN~! Notes are exchanges with Mr. Rhino digging up the road with a crane. Wait, someone is missing?! A certain bull who body shames Daddy Pig and has a decontrustion fetish. Where is Mr. Bull?! Peppa asks the same question and Mr. Labo can only say that he's on another job. Grandpa Pig wants to pass and Mr. Labo says "no". And here comes the BAD EPISODE POLICE~! They want to pass, Mr. Labo says "no". HA! Officer Panda and Officer Grey Squirrel claims that they have important things to do and that is enough to let them pass through. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! At Mr. Labo! Someone needs to fire that sexist dog anthro! By the way, Doctor Hamster and Doctor Brown Bear makes cameos driving. Grandpa Pig tries to follow them, but Mr. Labo cuts him off. Grandpa Pig says they have important things to do and Mr. Labo has that look that Grandpa Pig is being very sus. Peppa then proclaims that they are off on a boat and Mr. Labo thinks this is important and Mr. Labo lets them pass. HAHA! See, honesty is the best policy. Jump cut to the river with a shot of Grandpa Pig's boat. Peppa and George are wearing their lifejackets and Grandpa Pig...isn't. Oh fuck you, show! After showing one episode where the adults are wearing lifejackets on a canoe trip?! Grandpa Pig gets on the boat with the kids after the kids jump on without trouble. The gravity is being extremely selective here. Yes, Doctor Hamster was cut off by Mr. Labo from passing, why do you ask?! Grandpa Pig's jump into the boat is hilarious for the wrong reasons.

Grandpa Pig invokes the lever (CLEVER CLOGS~! VLOGS works just as well as I discovered from one of my famous slips of the pen.) and we sail the boat down the river. Grandpa Pig thinks no one can stop them, and then Mr. Bull yells stop on his metal digger boat complete with JAWS OF HALF LIFE and a traffic light fixture on the deck. HAHA! So much for that plan, Pirate Hog~! Mr. Bull is digging up the river, only he's actually cleaning the river by hauling up all the trash that litters the river. Hey, a great job to be sure, so Mr. Bull can make Grandpa Pig wait for all I care. Peppa and Mr. Bull exchange notes for a while as Peppa, George and Grandpa jump onto the deck of Mr. Bull's digger boat. We see shots of the trash in the bottom of the riverbed as the grey fish are sad according to Mr. Bull. You don't say?! I don't doubt you for a second. Human global fuckery, the weapon used to reject reality. We dig out various objects from the river for a while including the usual plastic bottles, a shopping trolly, tyres and then the biggest haul that almost causes the digger boat to sink: a CHEST OF DEMONS containing pirate treasure. Sadly, pirate gold coins are still in the river. Annoying, but Mr. Bull is trying hard to get them out, not putting it in like the fish pond in an earlier Series episode. I think you all know where this is going because we cannot have an episode featuring pirate treasure without the police. If you thought this was silly, Walkie-Talkies is still four episodes after this one! Sure enough, the police boat arrives with Officer Panda doing his usual triple hello promo because of course. Peppa explains the situation as Mr. Bull puts the chest above the front top of the police boat, proving that he does work for the government after all. Mr. Bull did say that he found it first, so I'm guessing this is standard protocol. Grey Squirrel writes notes on the notepad, I guess she has run out of sticky notes. Damn, ticketing everything in sight was her best gimmick.

The police will look out for the pirate who owns the treasure. I just love that this show thinks the pirate treasure is legit owned by a pirate, not realizing how pirates in real life get said treasure. I howl with laughter everytime. However, the chances of a pirate coming here is zero, is Grandpa Pig right?! Well, it's actually not zero because here comes the human pirate on his pirate ship with the red Polly palette swap. HAHA! Yes. this pirate uses a hook for it's left hand. The pirate even sings the TEDDY RUXPIN SONG OF DOOM to waste some time. By the way, the treasure chest is now on top of the police boat as the police boat meets with the pirate ship. The fact that the police are interacting with the pirate and the pirate is being treated like a babyface is comedy diamond to me. The pirate clearly the first time says that it's not his treasure, but then sees it and claims that it is his and that he buried it. The police are more clueless than Pedro F'N Pony here and it's much funnier in hindsight. Panda claims that it all checks out and the pirate gets the chest as the gold coins are spitting out of the chest. One of them lands on the police boat as the pirate ship speeds away well beyond a safe speed limit with gold coins spitting out of said chest while everyone says their goodbyes. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I would like to say that this is the stupidest moment for the police on this show, but Walkie-Talkies is still forthcoming and that was so stupid, it's hilarious. The police and Mr. Bull exchange more notes as Mr. Bull hasn't found more treasure, just trash. Somehow this is enough for the river to be clean and the fish to be happy and giggly. SUZY SHEEP~?! Peppa is loving this as Mr. Bull loves digging up the river. Everyone loves digging up the river as everyone does the backsplash laugh to end the episode at 4:30. Hey, if digging up the river gets rid of all that trash, I'm happy to see it dug up. This episode was hilariously awesome. **** 1/4 (85%).

Granny Sheep Moves In: This episode is #386 on the animation paper and the episode opens at the purple house on the hill as we zoom into a spare room filled with boxes and baskets. Suzy and Peppa are cosplaying with the hat basket for a while. Peppa calls Suzy lucky for having this spare room to herself as Suzy agrees with her. Then Mummy Sheep comes in all flustered because she says "Ah, fine!" under her breath, and then starts tidying up the room. Suzy is confused as Mummy Sheep explains that she's cleaning up the room completely because Granny Sheep is moving in with them. Suzy asks if there will be three people living and Mummy Sheep says yes. Suzy Sheep is thrilled as we head through a small box hall into the room of Mummy Sheep. Mummy Sheep reveals that Cousin Charlotte is driving Granny Sheep to the house right now. Yup, this is the three generation family angle that I was talking about in earlier Series. I should note that before Captain Dog reunited with Danny Dog in Series Four, the Dog family consists of Mummy Dog, Granddad Dog and Danny Dog, which is also a three generational family unit. The only difference is Granddad Dog and Danny Dog are male, while Suzy Sheep and Granny Sheep are female. Otherwise, exactly the same family unit. I'm guessing someone liked the three generational family unit and wanted it to continue in some form after Captain Dog came back. If so, then the chances of Daddy Sheep even being mentioned, much less seen would kill the gimmick. We hear a car horn and we head outside to see Charlotte Sheep driving her car with Granny Sheep and a lot of items that gravity clearly forgot on the roof of said car. SUZY SHEEP~?! Kudos to Charlotte for once not parking on the steepest side of the hill and making sure the trailer in the back isn't on the steep side either. Granny Sheep is wearing the best glasses on the show along with a purple skull cap and an marmalade dress with a candy design on the bottom half. Granny Sheep hugs her little lamb while carrying a blue vase with designs on it that spell abstract art.

Peppa proclaims that she is not a lamb, so Granny Sheep calls her a darling. Word. Granny Sheep heads inside as Mummy Sheep is complaining about the lack of room for all this stuff. Personally, I think the spare room can handle it. Granny Sheep claims that she'll find room, so she rearranges the entire sitting room, moving the tiny vase on the window to the left and putting the big vase on the right. Charlotte and Mummy Sheep bring in a plastic golden urn that doubles as some sort of drink depenser and a wacky new age lamp. The lamp is moved from the proper place to the middle of the room in front of the sofa because it needs to breathe. HAHA! Suzy and Peppa's smile say "I like this trolling". Granny Sheep is apparently a new age hippie as her gimmick. Suzy of course cannot suspend her disbelief and proclaims that it cannot breathe since it's a lamp. Granny also can speak some French as she tells Suzy and Peppa to play somewhere else while the moving is completed. Suzy and Peppa leave as Charlotte and Mummy Sheep are bringing in a green half sofa chair to the hallway and Granny Sheep tells them to bring it upstairs, just to be a troll. HAHA! By the way, the Sheep's selling of this was hideously hilarious. Peppa and Suzy decide to play in Suzy's room even though they went east and should be outside. SUZY SHEEP~?! Suzy and Peppa are sitting on the floor with Owlie and Catie (the orange cat Peppa is cosplaying. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.) as they exchange notes on the situation. There is a lot of noise in the background of crashing, shattering and apologizing; the kids don't care. Granny Sheep is also an artist which partially explains her decision on positioning of her stuff. Put in pin on the artistry stuff because it will come into play in the next episode I review. Anyhow, the job is done and the kids go inside Granny Sheep's new room as Granny Sheep is sitting on the bed pondering. The room looks exotic with sun and crescent moon symbols and musicial instruments on the side of the door. Charlotte and Mummy Sheep are positioning a rug like picture which the designs look exotic as well. I forgot that Granny Sheep is wearing a four gem stone necklace. Somehow, the rug picture stays on the wall as the adults are done and they bail looking completely blown up.

Peppa and Suzy calls this old as Granny Sheep explains the rug as hand made in Kashmir, which means Kashmir, India; which wasn't a country in "International Day" by the best artisians they could find. Suzy basically buries Granny Sheep in response by whisper yelling to Peppa that they don't have to listen. Suzy insists that she can buy whatever she wants via Mummy Sheep's computer, but Granny Sheep no sells because she is an artist, you see. They all head into the hall as Granny Sheep demands a room to make things, but Mummy Sheep complains that there is no more room in the house. At first, I thought they would use the hallway they were in now, but Suzy has an idea: use the attic. Although the attic may be scary according to Suzy. I should note that there is a background music piece during the visit to the attic that I have never heard of before. Granny Sheep goes up the attic first and it is dark, but once Granny whips the white sheet from the window, the light comes in and it's perfect. Granny Sheep tells Charlotte and Mummy Sheep to bring her things up as the two adults look each other like they are totally confused. Scene change as Granny Sheep is with Peppa and Suzy. I don't know why they bothered with the scene change since nothing else came up, so they could have shown Suzy and Peppa going up the attic. Oh well, let's move on. Granny Sheep then brings out a gong and gongs this episode. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Okay, Granny Sheep is awesome. She's the sheep edition of Reggie Rabbit now. She wants a cup of tea and Mummy Sheep offers to make her tea. We head into the kitchen as Mummy Sheep cannot find a kettle because Granny Sheep's things are in the kitchen, you see. Granny Sheep then enters the room with the kids wondering what is taking so long. We discover that the kettle is in fact the golden plastic urn with the spout attached to it as it pours tea from the tea cups on the matching golden tray. HAHA! Somehow, the purple dome is basically a strawberry cake under glass, much to the delight of the kids. Sadly, the orange juice are in generic beakers. You win some, you lose some. Granny Sheep calls Peppa a lamb, Peppa has to point out that it is "Pig" and she speaks I think Italian, since before this, she spoke in French and Spanish. Everyone giggles as the narrator slowly says it all to end the episode at 4:30. A great debut for Granny Sheep as she is already fitting into a version of Reggie Rabbit, only doing it in her own way to make it feel unique. **** 1/2 (90%).

Cardboard Boxes: This episode is #387 on the animation paper and the episode opens at the purple house on the hill which is mirrored this time. Scene change to Suzy Sheep and Peppa Pig running down the stairs in the hallway.They run into the hallway leading to the door to the outside as Munmy Sheep is vacuuming the hall. There is a mountain of cardboard boxes on the ground for no reason whatsoever. Granny Sheep comes down and Mummy Sheep wants those boxes out of her life, but Granny Sheep says no because there is artistry in progress. Mummy Sheep decides to let them use the cardboard boxes outside in the garden, and Granny Sheep tells Suzy to get her artist bag. They are using the background music for the attic scene in the last scene when Granny Sheep pushes the boxes out, so I have assumed this is Granny Sheep's theme music now. Peppa wants to make little houses out of the cardboard as Suzy wheels in Granny's art bag. Outside of a rainbow and some paint splashes, it's the most generic thingie in Granny Sheep's poccessions. So, the kids and Granny make their cardboard houses look colorful and wacky via a scene changer as Granny Sheep makes the curtains. She also speaks French here. Suzy made a yellow doormat out of a cardboard sheet with a smily face on top. Suzy and Peppa go into the house as Granny Sheep calls it cozy. In from the western front comes Pedro F'N Pony, see what I did there? At least he's riding a bicycle instead of his space hopper like he usually does. We exchange notes for a while as Pedro confuses the house with a shop. Granny Sheep decides that making it into a shop is a wonderful idea. Scene change to Pedro, Peppa and Suzy drawing and coloring items on cardboard as Granny Sheep returns with a white box dressed up as a shop. It looks like the biggest rosstisiare in the business, without the heat nor actual item. Peppa shows off her biscuit, Suzy shows off her ice cream cone and Pedro shows off his banana. Ouch, that was more disturbing than I had intended it to be.

Granny Sheep bails and returns with a cardbox box that is smaller than the items; but it still fits as if the box has TARDIS abilities. DOCTOR WHO~?! The kids put the cardboard items into the box as Mummy Sheep comes out with a chair to enjoy some tea. At least she didn't say that she doing nothing like Daddy Pig does, so I cannot get my obvious cheap shot in. Suzy offer Mummy Sheep to buy something at the shop and Mummy Sheep accepts. Suzy Sheep and Peppa explain the stuff and Suzy Sheep completely ruins it by saying that they are made of cardboard. When you play pretend, you are supposed to suspend your disbelief. It doesn't work if you give reality away like that. Mummy Sheep is just not amused by this. She buys the chocolate biscuit made of cardboard and Pedro Pony gives it to her. Mummy Sheep's selling of this is like "whatever" because Suzy completely ruined the illuison of this. Remind me never to allow Suzy Sheep to be a professional wrestler, she would expose the business like no one else. Ponder that one for a moment. In comes Danny Dog on a scooter as he wants to make a rocket and everyone accepts. Just like that! That is some awesome self-awareness from Danny there, show. Anyhow, we scene change to the kids making a rocket out of cardboard and drawing colorful stuff on it. The top is a pyramid shaped box, the middle is a white box with a large hole and the third is a bigger cardbox box with a bigger hole. Mummy Sheep decides to bail to the house, but is cut off by Granny Sheep and a cardboard full moon. HAHA! I guess Granny Sheep is the sun since Charlotte Sheep is not available. The kids get into the biggest box and we do the countdown. Yup, this is pretend for real because it's a cardboard rocket so there's no chance in hell they are going to the moon legit. Lots of cosplaying noises and pushing ensues. Even though this is a pretend rocket, Pedro somehow gets car sick from this. This inspires Suzy to want to make a hospital out of cardboard and Granny Sheep accepts, while Danny Dog wants it to be a space hospital. Of course, Suzy's motive is so she can wear her nurse's costume for the first time in ages.

Scene change to the space hospital being made, it's basically all the pieces from the previous sets being rearranged, and Danny Dog drawing and painting a green cross because the red cross is trademarked and protected far more seriously than Nintendo protecting it's trademarks and such. Danny awkwardly puts up the sign as Suzy comes out in her nurse's outfit and asks for sick people. Pedro is now officially better. HAHA! The whole point of creating the space hospital was to make Pedro better from getting car sick from the pretend rocket and now he's fine. Total troll moment from the clueless putz. I howled with laughter and then it gets better because Mummy Sheep is the sick one now, because Suzy Sheep says so. HAHA! Mummy Sheep protests, but she is caught and lead to the space hospital. Pedro and Peppa even do the siren, I'm sure Freddy Fox had a boner watching this. Mummy Sheep arrives outside and is told to lie down on the ground. Mummy Sheep complies and Suzy Sheep comes out and uses her pretend stetoscope to check Mummy Sheep's heart as I am dying with laughter here. Mummy Sheep now has a clean bill of health and Mummy Sheep thanks Suzy Sheep. Oh, and it begins to rain hard on them just to make my life complete. Then I get the best SUZY SHEEP~ moment of all time: Mummy Sheep bails into the house. The kids don't want to leave the space hospital in the pouring rain. Granny Sheep pushes the space hospital into the house with the kids following them. At this point, the space hospital is fully intact. Head inside the hallway and the space hospital is wet and crushed and destroyed. HAHA! These houses are killing these pieces of art methinks. Mummy Sheep is just not feeling it anymore as Granny Sheep and the kids are literally naming stuff to make once the storm ends, including a dinosaur from Pedro because George is not here. The kids and Granny Sheep laugh. Mummy Sheep decides to forget as the narrator says it all to end the episode at 4:30. Granny Sheep wasn't as big of a presence as she was in the hilarious department, but Suzy Sheep more than made up for it. Along with nature and the house. **** 1/2 (90%).

Clubhouse Takeaway: This episode is #388 on the animation paper and the episode opens at the clubhouse with the kids playing and the adults watching. Adults: Daddy Pig, Mummy Sheep, Mummy "I can be scary, honest!" Mouse, Mummy Cat and Doctor "I don't do console wars" Pony. Kids: Peppa Pig, Candy Cat, Suzy Sheep, Danny Dog, Pedro F'N Pony, Freddy Fox and Mandy Mouse. The kids all head into the clubhouse as they exchange notes on what they had for dinner. Or supper, same thing basically. The sun and cloud on the window in the background have faces I should note and somehow the spotty ball makes another appearance. Peppa had spaghetti, Pedro had baked beans, Mandy had cheese and Suzy Sheep had a pizza takeaway, which causes the kids to ooooo on that one. I should note that the takeaway episode has happened on Peppa Pig Tales. However, it's not a logic break since the takeaway here debuts in the mainline series and all episodes are self-contained anyway. Otherwise, Peppa would be 25 years old and probably the same size and shape as Mummy Pig. Yeah, let's move on. Besides, it's Freddy Fox who doesn't know what a takeaway is, not Peppa. Suzy explains the takeaway, which is take-out in North America. I should note that Suzy in the flashback was with Mummy Sheep and Granny Sheep when they rang up the order. Apparently, Daddy Cat is a pizza delivery motorcycle rider as one of his jobs. I don't think Mr. Donkey is the pizza chef in the store though. I thought it would be Uncle Goat originally, but the anthro is clearly not a goat. The pizza cost $17.49 by the way on the debit machine when the card is used to swipe it. This world truly is a cashless society. Everyone is in awe as Suzy proclaims that it was awesome and a ***** meal. Damn, I was hoping she would say it's mid and give it ** 1/2, since trolling is so on-brand with her and this show. Peppa decides that they should do a pretend takeaway and run out to get the adults approval. I don't know why they bothered since it's just pretend and no real money is being exchanged. The adults accept as Mummy Sheep is a fan of takeaways.

The clubhouse will be the food place as the kids all run in and Mummy Sheep gets her cellphone and says ringing sounds because apparently they is no feature on the cellphone to test out the legit ring tone, or the ring tone is offensive and BS&P would get pissed. Either answer works for me. Pedro Pony is the one to answer the phone, the one kid who doesn't have the two clicks in the making of a clue. His hearing also sucks, because Mummy Sheep has to yell with glee to order some food. To be fair to Pedro Pony, Mummy Sheep's order is so random that even I didn't get it the first time. Thankfully, Suzy Sheep tells him that it's crispy fried vegetables. I get the reason for the vegan meals is due to people who run their mouths about the anthros eating their own kind. Never mind that human beings (homo sapiens who are not vampiris') are dumb animals in the sea of life, so eating meat in real life is not much different in that regard since it's made of dead animals anyway. This is rendered moot because Pedro claims that they have no veggies anyway. Somehow, they have a salad, pie and pizza on retainer according to the orders of the other adults because Pedro accepts the orders and then hangs up. The kids all decide to find stuff in the wild to cook their meals, which falls to Danny Dog, Candy Cat and Freddy Fox. This means leaves, sand and wood for the orders. Well, they did say this is a pretend takeaway, so no real ingredients are needed. The kids return to the counter window as Peppa puts the stuff in seperate pots and pans and stuffs it in the toy oven. Suzy yells "ping" and literally seconds later, the stuff is done. HAHA! But wait?! Suzy proclaims that they need boxes to put the food in. Pedro goes to Doctor Pony to ask about a box and Doctor Pony brings out Pedro's lunchbox which still has a legit sandwich in it. The other adults (Daddy Pig and Mummy Sheep) offer the kids lunchboxes and Pedro thanks them.

We head inside the clubhouse on the table as the boxes are open and the "food" is plopped inside the boxes and sealed. Now, we need the delivery motorcycle rider and that role is Mandy Mouse's. Of course! What a fool I am?! She's in a wheelchair, and thus is perfect for the delivery role. By the way, Mummy Mouse and Mummy Cat are written out by teleport. SUZY SHEEP~?! Freddy Fox slides the boxes down the slide to Mandy. Mandy gives the boxes to the adults who ordered this stuff while riding through the swing set in the funniest moment of the entire episode. I just love how Mummy Sheep is confused at this despite this is suppose to be a pretend takeaway that they aren't suppose to eat in the first place since the food is fake. However, she have to sell it like it's real food. Mummy Sheep is the GEEK OF THE WEEK~! I wonder where Suzy learned her unable to suspend disbelief attitude from?! Wink! Wink! Nudge! Nudge! Daddy Pig actually got it from the start, although he didn't quite stick the landing with the debt card swipe which Mummy Sheep also did. Doctor Pony totally got the work and outclasses everyone. He should be a professional wrestler, although he would be a kinder Stan Hansen. The adults are asked how many stars and they decide to Dave Meltzer the star ratings just to make the star rating system pointless. Time to use percentages now, it's better. Everyone pops as Peppa is hungry now and Daddy Pig offers the pretend pizza just to troll on Peppa. HAHA! Peppa somehow no sells this deal as Daddy Pig, Mummy Sheep and Doctor Pony bring out sandwiches out of nowhere and the kids have their lunch. Suzy's on whole wheat bread I should note. Doctor Pony asks how many stars the sandwiches are and Pedro gives it ****. HAHA! The clueless putz has a better clue on the star rating system than the adults. Geek! Anyhow, we wrap things up as Peppa calls it the best takeaway ever. Everyone laughs to end the episode at 4:30. This wasn't the best takeaway, but it might be the funniest. Just to see Mummy Sheep forgetting to suspend her disbelief. *** 3/4 (75%).

Walkie-Talkies: This episode is #389 on the animation paper and the episode opens at the white house on the hill as the back door opens and out comes Peppa and George Pig running west towards the garden. Grandpa Pig is weeding out slugs from the lettuce as usual. Peppa is repulsed by this while George don't care as usual. The slugs are naughty and must be crushed into that steel bucket, says Grandpa Pig. No, not really. Grandpa Pig is done checking the lettuce after two slugs and the kids and Grandpa Pig head to the wooden shed as there is rubber orange hoses on the bottom of the front wall of the shed. We head inside as the hoses are connected to an automatic watering machine, which looks more ancient than my legs at this point. Grandpa Pig pushes a green button to demonstrate the watering of the strawberry plants. The setup looks like it can easily drown the plants and kill it without a sprinkler head attached to it. This is great, except Grandpa Pig is our GEEK OF THE WEEK~ because he doesn't know which button does which. You didn't even bother to label the buttons beforehand?! Like Grandpa Pig, like Daddy Pig, eh?! However, it's all a setup for Peppa and George to use walkie-talkies, which look like stopwatches without the actual watch. Peppa thinks they are phones, but they really are not. Grandpa Pig proclaims that the police use them as we get a scene on the boring road of Officer Grey Squirrel getting ice cream from Mr. Labo. Sadly, she doesn't ticket him for being a bigot. Grey Squirrel contacts Officer "Why does this show hate my kids?!" Panda in the police car literally feet away with the walkie-talkies. HAHA! By the way, stupid criminals have done this as well, only with cellphones. Back to the woodshed as Grandpa Pig will have one walkie-talkie and Peppa will have the other one. Grandpa Pig will be "Pirate Hog" and Peppa Pig will be called "Jelly Face". I guess George is "Dinesaur GRRRR!"; but he isn't getting a walkie-talkie of his own, so that's out of the running sadly. Please remember all this for later. And Peppa Pig bans that name anyway like the troll that she is, so George is Mr. Cheese. Again, please remember all this for later. The kids bails to check on the garden as we cut to the boring road with the police car being driven by Officer Panda with Grey Squirrel as the front seat driver of this outfit. I think you can tell where this is going now.

Yup, the walkie-talkies are so powerful that Officer Panda and Grey Squirrel pick up the signal. Of note; Mr. Stallion is driving on the opposite side of the road in the background, because in Britian, they often drive on the opposite side of the road that we do in North America. The police stop on the grass because those are made up names because no one can have a nickname on this show despite me nicknaming them for years now. Mummy Mouse's eye contact violence on them in the background driving her car proves that these police officers are extremely sus, if you know what I mean. Officer Panda claims that they are talking in code, so we can now add "potato" to the drug slang lexicon like the "fishsticks" code in "Save The Tiger!" in TaleSpin. Grey Squirrel and Panda decide to check these sus coders out and resume driving on the road as Grey Squirrel is contacting headquarters on the siutation while Mr. Rabbit is driving in the background. Apparently, "pirate" is code for "drug dealer" in the Peppa Pig world. Okay, good to know. Cut back to Peppa and George checking out the sprinkler system for the plants as the slug returns for more Grandpa Pig panicking. Of course! Thankfully, George finds it and grabs it while giggling. George is told to put it in the bucket as the officers listen to the whole thing and they gasps. They think this slug is code for a dead body. I howled with laughter hearing that one. These police officers are bigger geeks than Grandpa Pig here. It turns out that the whole purpose of this was to properly label the sprinkler system. Yup, Grandpa Pig is no longer on the geek list for this episode. It ends with the beans getting water as we jump cut to outside the white house on the hill. Granny Pig comes out with the table set up for orange juice and slices of cake for the four of them. Granny calls on the kids to come up for snacks and Peppa and George run up the hill to exchange notes on the situation. The police car arrives and parks on the steepest side of the hill...AGAIN! Officer Panda and Grey Squirrel are now practicing the fine art of not being seen, which I howl with laughter because these officers are complete fools.

Granny Pig is using the transmitter to contact Grandpa Pig to come up to have cake; and the clown officers hear it as code for exchanging money for drugs, or something. Why isn't this a Youtube Poop video yet?! You don't have to edit much of it and it would still work as parody. Just have the officers say the quiet parts out loud. Easy. Anyhow, the Pigs all have their cake and orange juice when the officers yell "Police" and everyone panics. We have the staredown of doom. If you ever saw the meme of someone literally dressing themselves as a clown in steps, this is exactly what is happening to Panda and Grey Squirrel in literal real time. The police deserve everything they get from this self-burial. They are that dumb. They are very stupid and no one has learned anything. Apporos for such a pointless, but hilarious complete self-burial. Grey Squirrel's eye contact violence is straight up projection at this point. Grandpa Pig tells them that they live here and Grey Squirrel is the only one who is self-aware that she just got buried and put in a clown's outfit by herself and Officer Panda. Everyone exchanges notes on the situation as the officer are seriously trying to salvage their creditibility and it's failing like mad. Granny Pig gives them slices of cake and Grey Squirrel goes through their notes and cake is one of the coded words, among others. Peppa mentions "Jelly Face" and I howled with laughter. That is because Officer Panda said before Grey Squirrel went through her notepad, that Peppa would not understand these coded words. Officer Panda got exposed! I laughed and laughed and laughed some more. The Pig family rightfully laughs in their face, confesses dead to rights and shows off the watering operation just to complete the burial of the police. I cried with laughter. Panda is relieved that there is no pirate gang as everyone laughs while a police siren plays in the background with the narrator saying it all to end the episode at 4:30. This was the best episode in Series Eight, bar none so far. You know what this episode is getting. ***** (100%). It's amazing how the best episodes featuring the police are when they look like geeks (Parking Tickets), compared to the worst episode where they look like someone to defund (Little Cars).

Peppa's Office: This episode is #390 on the animation paper and the episode opens at the house on the hill. We zoom into the office as Daddy Pig is at the drawing board making up blueprints while Mummy Pig is on her computer writing another coded book for something I do believe. It's also 9 AM on the clock. Peppa walks in and claims she's bored because George just wants to play dinesaur (sic) all day as George cuts his promo off-screen. Then the computer dings and a letter arrives on-screen on the computer called an email. Peppa is confused as the email is opened and this is what the email said: "Fungly Ongly wis hippily ktumpt. te Fine". I translated this from dumbass to English: Funny Onion was happily tumpet. The Final. Yeah, not much to see here. I'm not going to bother to translate Mummy Pig's coded message back because the cellphone rings and Mummy Pig answers it. It's Mummy Sheep as we jump cut to the big glass mall that looks like a triple decker greenhouse. I'm not going to bother referencing the cameos here because it's the exact same cameos as in a previous episode that I ranted on. Jump cut to Mummy Sheep talking to Mummy Pig on the cellphone in the cafe area. Mummy Sheep asks if she wants to join her for a coffee, Mummy Pig says she's too busy and hangs up. Even funnier, the clock reads 11:05 AM when we return to the home office. Yes, this whole sequence took two hours and five minutes to complete in Peppa Pig time despite the show being less than one minute in. SUZY SHEEP~?! Anyhow, Peppa and Daddy exchange notes for a while. His "ticking boxes" I'm sure is going to get the dandruff up of the bigots. Never mind that all products entertainment or otherwise do the exact same thing. In entertainment, it's called a "genre" or a "demographic". Sometimes we also call it a "job". When you hear bigots complain about an ordinary thing that they do all the time as well, it really means "box ticking to demographics I hate". Same thing with the "go woke, go broke" line, it really means "Don't bend the knee to me, you die!" Most corporations go broke not because they went "woke" because it's impossible for a corporation to do that because they are not people. They go broke because they spend well beyond their means, and then demands us to live within our means. You know why Nintendo gets all the heat when it comes to profits?! Because they spend within their means, and it pisses off the anti-capitalists, who wouldn't buy anyone's product anyway. Funny how that works.

Anyhow, enough of punching punchable faces, it's time for Peppa to do some rubber-stamping on paper as Daddy Pig has a call from his cellphone. We head to the office on the hill with Mummy Cat at her computer as Daddy Pig and Mummy Cat exchanges notes for a while. Peppa has one sheet rubber stamped with stamps as she's confused about this office speak. Sadly, I understood all of it and it sounds like regular speak in the modern era, so yeah. It's amazing how at this point, the mainline series is still using the same old model computer as in the 2000's in 2021, when Peppa Pig Tales is using modern computers that the PC's look like small books. Not a logic break, just an observation. Oh wait, Peppa is bored and Mummy Pig decides to give her a black keyboard to play with. Peppa sits down and plays it. Normally, this would be fine, but Peppa is making "ping" sounds just to troll on the parents as usual. Daddy Pig decides to gently usher Peppa out of the office before the computer gets wrecked again. This is done by the power of the scene changer as Daddy Pig and Peppa with keyboard enter the bedroom. George is still playing with his dinesaur...GRRR! Basically, it's taunting a blue model car according to the cosplay. Peppa calls it too noisy, the troll who makes noises with the ping sounds. The irony just writes itself. Peppa bails as Daddy Pig claims that there is no more more. Why not the sitting room?! It's not like Peppa cannot just sit down on the floor and use the keyboard like she did in the home office. Nope, she's going to pick the cupboard under the stairs; which is the room that use to lead to the basement as per The Power Cut. I believe this is also where a Peppa Pig Tales episode happened, I just cannot remember the name at this time. I cannot remember a lot of things without copious notes. They also play the curious music which I hear a lot in Series One, but almost never hear in Series Eight. Daddy Pig at first complains, but then recoils and removes the vacuum cleaner and tent that is inside. He bails and returns with a small chair and table and inserts it into the cupboard. I think this would be known as a "crawl space", but I'm not sure about that one. Anyhow, Peppa sits down in the chair and cosplays working on the keyboard, when George decides to troll Peppa back by entering the space and playing his car. Peppa tells George she cannot play with him, but George don't care. Notice that Peppa didn't tell George to leave the "office"? Please remember that for later, I suspect that will become important.

More cosplaying makes Gregory Weagle something something as Peppa bails to the home office. Peppa asks if she can do some rubber stamping and Daddy Pig not only gives her paper and stamps; but sticky tape, envelopes and other stuff. I have a feeling Daddy Pig is going to be the GEEK OF THE WEEK~ after this display. Peppa returns to the "office" and now she wants George to lick envelopes. George puts the car away and accepts. Uh-oh! Some reviewer who has a rage-bait money motive at stake is going to call this a induced drug high when this is all over. Peppa attends to her "work" as George licks the envelopes from the front because BS&P is never going to let him lick the inside of the flap. Of course! What a fool I am?! Peppa is making a mess with the rubber stamping and going all "ping". Jump cut to Mummy Pig on the computer as the cellphone rings and Mummy Pig answers it. We discover that the caller is Suzy Sheep. Mummy Pig goes down the officer with the cellphone because Suzy wants to talk to Peppa. By the way, the crawl space is a mess of paper and letters colored with crayons as George demonstrates. Peppa answers the phone and does the most confusing office speak I have ever heard. Suzy Sheep is confused and I don't blame her. The only thing I got out of it was Peppa cannot play with Suzy because she's working, which is probably the only thing she actually said. Sadly, they cut off the rest of the conversation because Peppa needs a rolling chair and exchanges her yellow chair for Daddy Pig's. Daddy Pig is perfectly fine with this exchange as Peppa bails, and then sits in it and he's our GEEK OF THE WEEK~! Mummy Pig puts the chair in the "office" and that is that. We cut to outside as the narrator talks for about twenty seconds before returning to the office with Peppa Pig sending her last email and Daddy Pig calling Mummy Cat on the cellphone to inform her that everything is done and they will see each other tomorrow. Daddy Pig is relieved as he needs a rest. We head downstairs as Peppa is acting with glee on Daddy Pig's rolling chair. The whole room, the entire floor and the walls are littered with decent drawings rubber stamped. Somehow, the parents enter from the eastern front below the stairs despite their room being on the top floor. SUZY SHEEP~?! The blank stares tell the story as Peppa shows off her work while George is in the background not giving two shits at all about this. I admit that this was funny. Peppa yells ping and everyone does the backsplash laugh as the narrator says it all to end the episode at 4:30. This was really fun and watching Suzy Sheep not get office speak is glorious. *** 3/4 (75%).

Little Swift: This episode is #391 on the animation paper and the episode opens at the house on the hill with Peppa running west out of the house towards the garden with a yellow kite. The narrator tells us that it's a windy day as the rest of the family follows Peppa down the hill. Peppa is taunting George and then stops at the bottom of the hill as there is a brown bird on the ground, selling like it's dead or badly hurt. Okay, badly hurt since the bird blinked it's eyes. It also moves it's wings a little so it's not as hurt as I originally thought, but it does need medicial attention. I should note that Daddy Pig calls the bird a bit poorly. In British English, it means "not well". Peppa is confused as Mummy Pig rings in Doctor Hamster as we head to Doctor Hamster's office with Doctor Hamster at her desk petting a green gecko. Probably the same one who suffered from professional wrestling syndrome. Doctor Hamster and Mummy Pig exchange notes for a while as Daddy Pig bails to get a shoe box to put the brown bird into. Peppa gets a twig and pokes holes into the box, so the brown bird can at least breathe. There is a secondary reason for the twig: When the bird is put into the box, putting the twig beside it allows the bird to feel safe since it has something to perch on as demonstrated. Then everyone gets into the car off-screen and drives to the vet to see Doctor Hamster. Jump cut to Doctor Hamster at the desk opening up the box and we discover that the brown bird has a proper name. It's called a little swift. While the spieces is real, the bird is usually in Africa and India as residents. However, they aren't really seen in Britian at all. Doctor Hamster should have said "common swift" since those birds are common in Britian. I cannot use the SUZY SHEEP~ defense here, since both birds are real and it's technically not a logic break. This is more due to the writers not thinking their script through. It's also 5 PM on the clock in the background I should note. We exchange notes for a while. I should note that the promos they cut does apply to both types of swift. A common swift flies to South Africa during the winter time, a little swift flies from South Africa to India among other countries. This is also demonstrated with the flat round circular earth. It's the art style, we all know the world is round in Peppa Pig's world, despite the gravity being extremely bonkers. The guise is that the swift is tired and just needs some rest, and probably needs lots of water to drink, knowing our resident hamster who cannot get it through her head that tortoises can climb trees.

Oh wait, Doctor Hamster is going to give it some insects on a glass dish which are black beetles apparently. Peppa is absolutely grossed out by this while George is giggling his ass off. HAHA! Daddy Pig sums that one up for me as Doctor Hamster feeds the swift and puts the cover on the box to let it sleep. Peppa says goodbye as we scene change to outside on the boring road as Peppa's blank stare indicates that she's already worried about the bird. Well, to be fair; Doctor Hamster is the same vet who thinks tortoises cannot climb trees, so there is a sus factor in this situation. Peppa asks about why birds fly and the family has no real answer for it other than "nature being nature". They might as well have said "I don't know" and been more honest. Especially the last one Daddy Pig said. That was dumb. Peppa wants to fly, but she wants to be a birdwoman because flying in the plane is not the same. She's right; but good luck being a birdman Peppa. Flapping wings is not enough when gravity is the ruler. The questions continue and Mummy Pig continues to say that "nature being nature" as they arrive at the house on the hill as the sun is going down. Scene change to three hours later as it's AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark). The kids are in the room all tucked in as Peppa cannot let this flying thingie go, so Mummy Pig tells her that she cannot fly, but she can sleep. Daddy Pig continues to creep me out with the "my little piggies" line as Peppa hopes the bird is okay. Daddy Pig assures her that the bird is okay in response. The kids fall asleep as we hit the dream sequence of Peppa literally being a birdgirl in her night shirt doing stunts with the common swift. I'm perfectly fine with this because it is a dream. It's wetter than wet, but I can accept that. I have had far worse dreams than her that were frightenly more believable than this. Peppa sings her usual song about flying and then we scene change to the vet as the car arrives. Everyone gets out and enters at 9 AM. Doctor Hamster is at the table with the box containing the common swift as everyone meets and greets. Doctor Hamster opens the box and the swift comes out flying, landing on Doctor Hamster's head. Yup, it's all better. Peppa is impressed as she suggests the swift wants to fly and Doctor Hamster walks out the back door with the swift on her head, that was amusing. The common swift flies into the sky and everyone says their goodbyes. Peppa proclaims that the swift can fly into her dreams to end the episode at 4:30. Peppa is now American dub Clown Man when it dies. Okay. Episode was fine. *** (60%).

THE REVIEW LINE

Well, we got some bangers and some fun episode in this set of episodes this time around. Walkie-Talkies is so far the best episode of Series Eight and maybe the funniest one since Parking Ticket due to Officer Panda and Officer Grey Squirrel just literally acting like that meme where the person dressed up like a clown, basically falling for the obvious thinking that Grandpa Pig was really a drug dealer and producing dead bodies when he was just watering his garden. The authority figures look like complete clowns and I was laughing my ass off every single second of that episode. It was glorious. The only way this would have been worse for them (but awesome for us) was George was allowed to say Mr. Dinesaur, just to make the police look like bigger fools. You could make a Youtube poop video out of this episode and just replace the audio with the police saying the quiet parts out loud and it would work perfectly as comedy. Granny Sheep Moves In & Cardboard Boxes was also a banger two part arc. Granny Sheep is basically a calm more reversed version of Reggie Rabbit: She's quiet, but everything she does make me laugh with her, especially when paired againest Mummy Sheep. She speaks three different languages and I can see her getting along with Mummy Llama and Gigi Gazelle in a future episode if such an episode materializes. She has not done the muddy puddle jump yet, but that is coming up in the next rant. The second half of the Cardboard Boxes episode deserves a mention for the space hospital scene which also made me laugh my ass off, mostly the build and the payoff to the whole thing. The finish was also hilarious in a SUZY SHEEP~ sort of way. Mr. Bull Digs Up The River was also great for the environmental angle and the climax involving the police and the pirate. I still laugh my ass off that this show is telling me that the pirate's treasure was legit the pirate's. Alway comedy diamond to me. Peppa's Officer was close to a banger as well, although one logic break correction would have been an easy thumbs up. Clubhouse Takeaway was also very good, although I would have liked it more if Suzy called the takeaway pizza mid instead of five stars. The rest of the episodes were fine to fun as overall, this was a really good set of shorts. Next up is more Peppa Pig firsts, including the huge three episode arc as Mr. Bull and Mrs. Cow do the unthinkable: Find a way to bring Orlando Bloom and Kathy Perry into this world. So...

Thumbs up for Walkie-Talkies, Granny Sheep Moves In, Cardboard Boxes and Mr. Bull Digs Up The River. Thumbs in the middle for the rest and I'll see you all next time.

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