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Peppa Pig: Series Six #4 Rant

Reviewed: 03/15/2020
Additional Review: 05/07/2020

Time For EastEnders Peppa Pig!


Okay fans; I have now decided to rant on this series full time, because I do in fact like this show enough that I can handle the best and worst of the Pig family from Great Britian. I promised a Christmas episode review and I shall deliver one. This episode actually aired a few weeks on YTV Treehouse before the United Kingdom version aired and I have seen it enough times to do a full review. So, I decided to wait until Christmas Day to review it to avoid as many spoilers as possible. So, the plot of this episode is that Peppa trips and teases breaking her arm, and goes to the hospital on Christmas Day. I'm glad I waited until now because some of the stuff I said here is unbelievable, even for this show. Then from there, we have some Valentine's Day trolling on everyone, followed with Perfect Days with photo booths, Breakfast Clubs, Botanical Gardens, a Relaxation Class that stresses you out and the final burial of Doctor Hamster caused by one of my favorite character of all anthros. How do these episodes fare? Let's rant on shall we..?!

All the episodes are done by Neville Astley, Mark Baker and Phil Hall. Animation is done by Astely Baker Davies animation; with the two mentioned creators and Phil Davies.


Miss Rabbit's Relaxation Class: This is episode # 269 on the animation paper and the episode opens at the little house on the hillas we zoom into Mummy Pig's office as she is on the computer again, probably writing another secret coded story book as Geroge dances around in his regular gear, while Peppa is still in her sleeping gear, while Daddy Pig walks in in his work gear, you got all that?! Daddy is yelling and this give Mummy Pig the wiggle mouth of doom. Peppa is going to Play Group and just needs her shoes as she bails. George comes in with the party hat and flavors, just to give Mummy Pig wiggle mouth number two in the last fifteen seconds or so. By the way, Daddy Pig is SOOOOOO dumb that he forgot that he's carrying his briefcase the entire time. Of course! Daddy Pig, Peppa and George run out, jump into the car at the back of the house and Daddy drives down the hill. Somehow; as the kids are saying goodbye, Mummy Pig's hearing is so good that she can hear them and respond. Then it's computer work time. Then her cell phone rings and she answers it as it's Miss Rabbit having tea at the office, which apparently, she is the supervisor for the fitness center. They exchange notes for a while as Miss Rabbit blows off Mummy Pig for being on her computer, because it causes stress. No, Miss Rabbit; COVID-19 is causing stress in people today, and you should self-isolate for the rest of your life, just out of mere principle. Considering her gimmick, the virus is the LEAST of her problems. Miss Rabbit has a "relaxation class" to "relieve stress". Yeah, I'll bet! Remember, this is Miss Rabbit we are talking about here, whose gimmick is doing hundreds of different jobs, AT THE SAME TIME! No relaxtion class is going to help that. Miss Rabbit claims that this will give Mummy Pig a sense of "inner happiness". Yeah, I'll bet! Mummy Pig accepts the deal and Miss Rabbit hangs up. This is not going to end well for Mummy Pig at all. So, scence change to the sports center on the hill as the narrator points out the obvious to everyone and then we cut back to Miss Rabbit's office as Miss Rabbit is throwing spitballs into the trash bin. I am not making that up! Why? Why not?!

In comes Mummy Pig at 9 am as they are about to engage in small talk; but the phone rings and Miss Rabbit answers it. Miss Rabbit then whisper yells to Mummy Pig that the gym is to the west. I can accept that, it's not like they were hiding anything there. Mummy Pig walks off stage left as Miss Rabbit is speaking to someone about a bouncy castle or some silly thing.So, Mummy Pig walks into the gym area as she sees Mr. Fox, Mummy Wolf and Mrs. Zebra meditating as Mummy Pig asks if this is the relaxation class and Mr. Fox says yes and they are here to find inner happiness and calm...and then Miss Rabbit yells and ruins the buzz. As usual. Since this is a stress free class, all mobile phones must be turned off, which all four of classmates do. Now, everyone meditates and Miss Rabbit needs to turn down the volume of her promos here. Oh, and Miss Rabbit is a hypocrite since her cell phone is still in her pocket and not turned off since it rings out of nowhere. That of course ruins the buzz as Miss Rabbit runs the sports centre and tells everyone she'll be back in a mo, since apparently, someone has arrived. So, Miss Rabbit bails stage right to her office and guess who arrives: Gigi Gazelle with all the kids, minus Mandy Mouse, George, Edmond, Richard and Wendy Wolf. Peggi and Pandroa are here though. They are here for the gym lesson as Miss Rabbit notices and bails out of her office and heads into the gym bringing out a pomel horse and basketball, making as much noise as BS&P would allow without making it so quiet that it doesn't ruin the adults buzz. Mummy Pig gets the cringe eye as a result and then relaxes again...for about three seconds as the kids all run in to annoy everyone, and Peppa comes in to greet her mother, which normally would be a troll move, but I suspect Peppa was totally geniune in this moment. They exchange small talk for a while and then Peppa bails for the gym lesson. So, all the kids are doing lessons on various structures and Gigi proclaims that she wants to see a lot of jumping, and climbing and running.

I should note that the YTV Treehouse promos for Peppa Pig changed this to "I want to see jumping, climbing and running." and somehow manages to get the mouthflaps right in the process. So, it's ready steady GO~! There is a bouncy ball horse, which Peppa bounces on. Pedro is on the most lamest balance beam you have ever seen, there is no way I could take him seriously falling off that thing. Emily is using her trunk on the pomel horse. Candy is on the trampoline, Rebecca and Molly are catching a basketball, Pandora and Peggi are playing ping pong and I have no idea what Suzy and Freddy are doing as the adults in meditation class are struggling because there is a bunch of kids making a lot of noise. The basketball bounces away and hits Mrs. Wolf in her tummy and she barely sells it; so the meditiation sort of works, I guess. The ping pong ball hits Mrs. Zebra and she barely sells it, so the meditiation sorts of works, I guess again. Gigi and Miss Rabbit are shouting to see who is the bigger asshole in this war of loud voices. I think Miss Rabbit's winning this one...and in comes Daddy Pig with George Pig, Zula and Zaza Zebra and Edmond Elephant with party hats on. I deduced here that Zula and Zaza's birthday was today and this alone makes Mummy Pig sounds like she literally wants to be somewhere else. Lots of giggling ensues as Daddy Pig steps on a remote button since he brings in the most Gedo-fashion sense bouncy castle he could find. Oh, snap! Little kids bounce in bouncy castle as Peppa bounces in on the red bouncy horse ball of doom greeting Daddy Pig. Mummy Pig has the look of "I can't believe Peppa is not trolling me or anyone this time around."; because this is so on brand for her. And Daddy Pig joins into the bouncy castle, because he has no shame whatsoever. Mummy Pig tries to relax; but gets the dreaded WHISTLE OF SCREAMS in the face by Miss Rabbit, just to be the biggest jerk in the room as the class is over and Miss Rabbit asks Mummy Pig how it went, and Mummy Pig declares it very stressful, to which Miss Rabbit claims that this happens all the time. Of course! This class needs a relocation, STAT! So, Miss Rabbit offers Mummy Pig a go on the bouncy castle and Mummy Pig is already in it and bouncing to her heart's delight. She proclaims this is is relaxing and thus buries Miss Rabbit's class completely, which I'm glad because this class sucks! The little kids all join her and some seem to be trying to do the backsplash laugh, but failing to end the episode at 4:30. The ending to this was great and the lesson learned is: Computers do not induce stress, actual viruses do. **** (80%).

Opening Moment #1: This episode uses the snowy opening theme sequence.

Christmas At The Hospital: So, first up is episode #290 on the animation paper as the episode opens at the little house on the hill with snow outside. Zoom into the living room as it's Christmas morning as Daddy Pig is wearing the crown, since he's the head of the household. I'm glad that is not a tradition in my house. Sadly, everyone has exactly one present this year, so money seems to be tight. Mummy and Daddy Pig open their presents to reveal matching socks, that could easily be stocking to hang on the fireplace. Since this is a preschool show, underwear is not in evidence here. Peppa opens her present and she got a toy car and then she starts concern trolling George into thinking that he got socks, but George opens his present and got a toy airplane . And then Peppa and George run around the tree in a clockwise direction as Daddy Pig wants to spend the rest of the day doing nothing. Relaxing is doing something, that's why saying "Nothing of note" is a better promo. Mummy Pig is telling the kids to be careful and Peppa trips and falls on her belly and face, and it appears that she is selling her left arm as a tease that she might have broken her left arm. I'm relieved that the Christmas tree didn't fall on her because that would have made it much worse and Peppa was DARING for that to happen. Of course, they cannot say "break", so they say that she bumped her arm. As if she was in a professional wrestling match. If she really broke her arm, she would be screaming in pain and agony; so it's clear that her arm was fine even then. So, Mummy Pig decides to ring in Doctor Brown Bear. WHHHHYYYYYYY?! So, we head to Doctor Brown Bear's office as Doctor Brown Bear is in his Christmas gear enjoying Christmas and actually answers the phone. Now, at this point, he should have just rang in the hospital and inform them that Peppa is coming. Nope! He decides to make the house call straight away and gets into his ambulance car and drives towards the little house on the hill, despite the entire road being completely covered in snow. WHAT?! That is complete BS and we cannot have ONE EPISODE where Doctor Brown Bear can enjoy himself?!

So, yeah; Doctor Brown Bear comes and and asks where it hurts. Peppa states that it's her left arm and Doctor Brown Bear asks her to wiggle her fingers and she does without pain, so I suspect her arm is fine. Brown Bear errs on the side of caution and offers to bring her to the hospital for further tests. Why not just call the hospital and tell the family to go there, you moron?! So we head to the hospital and the roads are snow covered as hell. Cut to the emergency waiting area as there are several injured adults; including a legit injured Mr. Bull who has a broken arm and leg. Miss Rabbit, nurse par excellence, comes out and is about to call for Mr. Bull to come in as Mr. Bull slowly gets up. But wait, he gets cut off by Doctor Brown Bear and the entire Pig family as they are inside. Brown Bear informs Miss Rabbit that Peppa is a sick child, and I'm not sure weither to hate him or laugh at him for such a comment. Mr. Bull notices Mummy Pig and decides to just sit down and let Peppa pass, because children get seen first in this hospital. I think he wanted no part of Mummy Pig after Funfair, but whatever. So, the family and Miss Rabbit enter the children's ward and guess who is in bed? C'mon, guess; it's too shocking. SURPRISE! It's OKAY, BOOMER EIASION! POW! OUCH! Ummm...Yes, it's our residence clueless wonder, Pedro F'N Pony in pjs who has broken his leg...AGAIN! WHAT?! He also had a sticker on his pjs and thankfully, he doesn't once annoy the nurses here, that would have sucked. So Peppa sits down in a chair as Miss Rabbit asks her where it hurts and Peppa says it's on her arm. Miss Rabbit asks Peppa if she can wiggle her fingers and Peppa sells it. Then Miss Rabbit asks her to say banana and Peppa says it, but it was a joke according to the nurse. It wasn't funny, but I'm fine with it since it was supposed to make her relax and panicking does no one any good in this situation. Peppa is relaxed and so Miss Rabbit brings in the portable x-ray machine to check on the arm and they check the arm and it's perfectly fine, so for all that drama, the whole tease of Peppa's arm being broken was pointless and put everyone else in danger due to the snowy roads. I shake my head.

Also, they do the spot where Peppa asks how the x-ray machine works and Daddy goes into his science explain mode, but then gets cut off by Miss Rabbit saying it's magic. If Pedro said that; that would be funny, because kids get it and don't care. When an adult is saying that, that causes mature adults to question her licensing. Anyhow; now that the crisis is averted, we have another one for Pedro because he hasn't got his presents yet. Maybe they are at home and the Pony family hasn't delivered them yet. It's common sense, people! So we head back to the waiting room as Miss Rabbit teases calling in poor injured Mr. Bull; but wait! In comes Father Christmas hoing and then Mr. Bull just sits back down and lets Father Christmas pass. Okay, when Peppa was admitted into the emergency room; that was perfectly acceptable, but a fictional character? That's a load of BS and Mr. Bull had nothing to do with it. So, yeah; Father Christmas comes in and gives a present to Pedro F'n Pony as promised. I guess he felt that seeing him in person was all right, since in the world of Peppa Pig, Father Christmas is not only real, he doesn't hide himself from anyone, including the adults! Pedro opens his present and it's a toy boat. Of course, it's not socks! I mention this because Peppa trolls Pedro like she did George earlier. Father Christmas is so happy and apologizes to Pedro for the delay due to the fact that the chimneys are getting smaller every Christmas. Wow; creosote is really solid in this show for some reason. And yes, we flashback to AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) with Father Christmas nearly stuck in a chimney and struggling to get out. This prompts Miss Rabbit to want to do a check on him and so Father Christmas decides to play along on this to kill time in a five minute episode. Father Christmas opens wide as per the instructions from the nurse and then invokes the SANTA CLAUS ROAR OF WINDBAGS on Miss Rabbit as per. Yep, he's fine. Oh, and Father Christmas gets a green smiley face sticker for his trouble. Awww, my heart melted. All the adults now enter the ward as Father Christmas is thankful for the service Miss Rabbit provides and Miss Rabbit proclaims that she is merely doing her job. Father Christmas says "Merry Christmas" and everyone does the backsplash laugh...with a twist as Mr. Bull has to slowly drop to the ground in order not to hurt himself to end the episode at 4:30. Mr. Bull is such a trooper despite it being a bad idea. There were some funny moments in this; but the entire Doctor Brown Bear stuff is so stupid. ** 3/4 (55%).

New Moment #1: Christmas At The Hospital would officially be the last episode of Peppa Pig that had Harley Bird voiced Peppa; and Amelie Bea Smith takes over from here on out. Outside of Peppa Pig, Amelie Bea Smith was Daisy in EastEnders. That's it. I thought Amelie's Peppa Pig was a cross between the three previous Peppas, although the opening sequence made it sound like this was her first take ever and they didn't bother to do a take where she sounded similar to Harley Bird. Thankfully, she got into the role quickly in the next episode.

Valentine's Day: Here is episodes #291 on the animation paper as the episode opens at the little house on the hill as we zoom into the kitchen with the Pig family having cereal for breakfast. Daddy asks Peppa what day it is and Peppa gets it wrong twice (It's not her nor Daddy's birthday, since they already done an episode for each one); because it's Valentine's Day. Peppa asks what that is and Mummy Pig that it's the day you tell the people you love them that you love them. Wait, shouldn't acts of kindness be a message sender? Valentine's Day is a dumb holiday because if you need a special to tell someone you love them, you don't really love them. At least Christmas and Halloween are structured to invoke acts of kindness which send a better message of love. Telling them you love them is cheap and should be done every chance it gets, no matter how annoying someone can be. Valentine's Day is just another holiday for businesses to make money from. Daddy Pig does give Mummy Pig a Valentine's Day card, and it looks like a sympathy card to me more than a love card. No hearts presents, but lots of flowers. So, Daddy Pig is sort of tone deaf here. So, Mummy Pig reads the card's contents and did this show just reveal that Daddy's real name is Snufflekins? I hope that is his real name, that would be MONEY! Sadly, no luck I bet. Then we get a hilarious moment: Peppa asks if Daddy Pig is getting a post card, and Mummy Pig says that Mr. Zebra has it and Daddy Pig thinks that Mummy Pig wrote a love letter to Mr. Zebra. Of course, Mummy Pig assures him that it is for Daddy Pig and not Mr. Zebra; because even Peppa Pig wouldn't stoop to the low of having a love triangle gone wrong. That amused me since it almost implied that Mummy Pig was having an affair with Mr. Zebra. So, we scene change to the school house on the hill as all the cars arrive and all the kids jump out and head inside. Mr. Bull is washing windows for some reason and I hope it's not due to COVID-19. Considering his record on roofs; I don't trust him to wipe down a school properly. So, the kids all sit down at the tables as it's Peppa, George, Edmond, Wendy, Freddy, Suzy, Danny, Zoe, Rebecca, Molly, Mandy and Pedro F'N Pony. Gigi addresses the kids as she asks what day it is and Pedro -- epitome of cluelessness, and yet is still right somehow -- proclaims that it's window cleaning day. In the background, Mr. Bull is cleaning the back windows outside. HA! Good one, Pedro.

Peppa corrects him and we repeat the summary of this holiday and then Peppa does her least endearing, but most notable trait: She trolls on Daddy Pig, claiming that Daddy Pig never got a Valentine's Day card even though she knows that Daddy Pig IS getting one from the post. That aspect Peppa intentionally omitted, because Peppa knew this since Mummy Pig told her right in front of her in the first segment. Now watch what happens for the rest of the episode as Gigi is sadden by this, the doorbell rings and Gigi answers it, revealing Mr. Bull who has finished wiping down the school of germs. I wish they would wipe out his fat shaming, but there's no easy cure for that one. Gigi looks sad as Mr. Bull consoles her as she tells Mr. Bull that Daddy Pig didn't get his love card. Mr. Bull leaves sadden by this as Gigi walks in and tells all the children that they are making Valentine's Day cards for the people we love. Everyone starts doing artwork on cards, as Pedro is making one for his love of SUPER POTATO~! Hmmmm, did Pedro just admit that his parents have been enabling his ugly cowboy American thievery? TUNE INTO SOFT COPY TO FIND OUT~! It's even funnier when in storyline, Super Potato is supposed to be real....Oh wait, he's making one for his Mummy and Daddy. Thank you for the spoiler there, you clueless cowboy! So, scene change to the supermarket on the hill as Mr. Bull enters, as there are Valentine decorations all over the place, making the whole business aspect of it, so transparent for everyone to see. Jump cut to inside at the cash register with Miss Rabbit talking to Mr. Bull. Ironically, these two are the only characters in the show -- who in storyline -- have multiple jobs, but only Miss Rabbit get the most heat out of it. Just an observation on my part as Mr. Bull is sad and Miss Rabbit asks why. Doctor Hamster is behind Mr. Bull as Mr. Bull states that Daddy Pig didn't get a card and the gossip is spread by Miss Rabbit to everyone in the store, including Granddad Dog, Mrs. Zebra and Mr. Fox; whom the last two just gasp. Also of note is that they have Valentine's Day stuff on their person during this; making them look both stupid and selfish, despite the fact that this was the result of Peppa omitting the fact that Daddy was going to get his card from Mr. Zebra. That is the entire storyline of this episode and it annoys me.

Scene change back to the kids finishing their Valentine cards and they show them to Gigi. Gigi is happy about this; Pedro only showed the Super Potato one, so he still don't really care about his parents. The bell rings and all the kids come out as the cars arrive. Mummy Pig walks towards Peppa and George showing off their cards which are for Mummy and Daddy. Scene change back to the house on the hill as Mummy is driving Peppa and George home, probably parking on the steepest side of the hill, as usual. Everyone goes into the kitchen as Daddy Pig is sitting at the table drinking tea. Peppa gives her card to Daddy Pig as he's amazed, more amazed than George being able to say Valentine, which might be the most complex English word he has spoke in which he said properly! Who said there's no character development on this show? Peppa asks about Mummy Pig's card and Daddy states that he hasn't got it yet. Then the doorbell rings and Daddy Pig goes over to answer it. It's Mr. Zebra with a sack of Valentine Day cards, which are all addressed to...wait for it...Daddy Pig. Actually, Daddy asked for his card, Zebra said no, because Daddy has all of them in the sack basically. And who caused all this? If you said Peppa Pig by not telling anyone that Daddy was going to get one from the post, you win the no prize. Peppa and George cheer for this; so Peppa was really being a troll as Daddy Pig asks Mummy Pig if she did a troll job on him, Mummy Pig said no and gives him the big red letter as the actual Valentine Day card. Mummy opens the card, reads it to Daddy Pig and then gives it to him. Mummy asks where the rest have been and Daddy Pig has no clue and blushes as the doorbell rings again. I just love that Daddy Pig blushes even though he had NOTHING to do with this. Daddy Pig answers the door and it's all the adults and kids wishing him a happy Valentine's Day. Of course! Daddy Pig giggles as everyone, except Daddy Pig does the backsplash laugh to end the episode at 4:30. The first time I watched this, I thought it made no sense because Peppa told everyone about Daddy Pig's card, except I forgot and it was revealed in the second viewing that Peppa did tell them about the card, but omitted that Daddy was in fact getting one; but it didn't arrive yet. So, it made sense because a troll has to troll so to speak. A fine episode otherwise. *** (60%).

The Perfect Day: Next up is episode #292 on the animation paper as the episode opens at the GLASS MALL ON THE HILL as various denizens are coming in from car. To save time, I'm not go to reveal them all, I assume this was a group gathering, which right now sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. So, the Pig family enters the mall as the kids are wowed by this; but Daddy Pig proclaims that they are not shopping because Mummy Pig is going to a spa for a Perfect Day Experience. So, in fact, she is shopping for a stress free day. Kind of kills it right there as I am suddenly realizing that Della Duck is getting more and more like a female Kit Cloudkicker the more I read Frank's tweets. I'm starting to think Kit really is the nephews father now. Hopefully I'm wrong because can you imagine the fanbase freaking out about that, and not just the Duck fans in general?! Sure, it's not COVID-19 by a mile, but still. No surprise who is running the spa and reading Ezza Magazine to boot. Miss Rabbit, everyone. I was actually hoping it was Mr. Bull, just for pure irony. Although, Miss Wolf is treating Mr. Bull's back as Miss Rabbit is explaining the experience. Mrs. Fox is painting finger nails on Mummy Pony while Mrs. Elephant is getting a cucumber facial with neon green gloop. Peppa ask if they are getting the same treatement and she says it in a way that she doesn't want to do it. Daddy assures her no, because they are going to have their perfect day. So, Mummy Pig decides on the facial treatement from Miss Rabbit as the rest of the family heads into the mall. There is a lot of people in there, where is not a good idea at this point. Daddy is not sure about this walking until we get to the escalator, which Peppa calls "magic moving stairs"; which at least Daddy Pig doesn't say "yes" to. So, Daddy grabs George and Peppa grabs Daddy's hand and they go up the escalator. So, they go up and going down the escalator is Mummy Sheep and Suzy Sheep. We exchanges notes for a while and then we REPEAT THE SEQUENCE, only Peppa is going to the bottom, while Suzy is going to the top. Because, why not screw yourselves while being fools?! So, Mummy Sheep gets to the top and takes Suzy away as Peppa is at the bottom proclaiming that she needs to see Suzy, but Daddy Pig don't want to do more magic stairs anymore than he has to. Besides, we haven't used the lift yet, so I'm guessing Daddy Pig doesn't want someone to think he's loitering or anything. Is there no park in this mall? I can understand no video arcade, but no park? They go up as we jump cut to Suzy and Mummy Sheep as Suzy is now wanting to see Peppa and Mummy Sheep wants to use the lift down. Suzy claims it's not working; but Mummy Sheep points out that someone is using it.

Suzy is complaining about seeing Peppa, and the door opens and out comes Peppa and they hold hands to reinforce the notion that they are best friends. Make sure you washed you hands well before this, all of you! So, Suzy then shows of her mug shots in various poses out of nowhere; which means the next spot is the coin operated photo booth, which is perfect for picture ids and driver licenses. Or to just be smug in Suzy's case. Peppa is amazed and Suzy wants to show Peppa the money operated photo booth, which means that they are shopping after all. Shopping for funny faces. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So, the kids all go into the photo booth as Suzy puts a coin in it (see, I told you it was coin operated!) and they sit on the stool (NOT THAT ONE!) and Peppa Pig is so clueless that everything she is supposed to smile, the camera takes way too long and Peppa protests this and then gets flashed. HAHA! We have finally found a moment where Peppa is more clueless than Pedro F'N Pony. Ponder that one for a moment. See, patience is not only a virtue, it might save your eyesight. The second one was much funnier then the first one by the way: The first one was Peppa looking to her right and getting flashed and the second one is Peppa looking at the camera directly with her eyes open completely like a moron. So then they make funny faces, except for George who snorts and they get it right this time. See, they were shopping for funny faces, it wasn't a rejected Rhinokey joke, honest. The last one has them actually doing it properly and Daddy Pig comes in asking if it's finished and the flash flashes him. So, yes; even Daddy Pig thinks this camera is trolling him. So, we go back out and show off the photos of funny faces, with Daddy Pig getting the best one of course. The kids want to do it again, and I agree, just for Mummy Sheep to get flashed and complete the cycle of life; but it's time to pick up Mummy Pig. Jump cut to Miss Rabbit massaging her back, and sadly, Miss Rabbit doesn't channel Gorilla Mansoon's infamous massage techinques on Bobby Heenan. In comes the rest of the Pig family as Peppa asks if she had a perfect day. Mummy says yes, and I believe her since it's not near what Miss Rabbit's Relaxation Class was. I'll explain why once I get to fully review the episode; which is still not available yet. Peppa completely recaps the episode up to this point and Mummy Pig calls it nice as the perfect day is done and the Pig family goes outside as the car magically appears via teleport. This puts a dent in the entire "it's science" thing when it happens in storyline.

So, everyone gets into the car and we drive down the hill onto the boring road. Mummy Pig asks if Daddy had a perfect day and Daddy responds by saying that his perfect day starts when they get home. So we head to the little house on the hill as Daddy Pig parks on the steepest side of the hill and magically has his boots on. If you cannot guess the perfect day, you have no business reading this rant. Yup, Daddy Pig runs down the hill and jumps into a muddy puddle. Everyone else follows as we do the pig ritual of making earthquakes again as Daddy Pig is in Nivarna now and then everyone does the backsplash laugh to end the episode at 4:30. So, 15 seconds were not cut, the episode was somehow sped up and I didn't notice. A fun episode with the usual finish and nothing more. ** 1/2 (50%).

Breakfast Club: The next episode is episode #293 on the animation paper as we open the episode at the school house on the hill as all the cars arrive and the kids jump out and head inside. The only thing of note here is that the narrator has to alert us that they are coming in earlier than usual. So, today's crowd consists of Peppa, George, Edmond, Rebecca, Wendy, Freddy, Emily, Molly, Zoe, Danny, and Pedro F'N Pony. No Mandy this time around. There are plates on the table as Gigi asks why they are at Playgroup so early today. Danny's response is classic: Because they didn't learn enough stuff yesterday. HAHA! That was a good one, and somewhat believable actually. Peppa thinks that it's because she really like them, and Gigi is like "yes, but not the reason". Pedro thinks it's a special day. When Pedro is the logical one, you know the kids are trolling on Gigi. Gigi proclaims that it's time for Breakfast Club, where they eat their breakfast. Since the kids were chanting this, they knew and they are trolling. Apparently, breakfast wakes up their mouths, so they can talk...and annoy as Gigi cuts off Peppa's annoying talking behaviour. More exchanges of thoughts about breakfast ensue, Suzy asks what is energy? My answer: The power you need to troll throughout the day. Yeah, I'm on a troll roll here, as it's been months since my last rant. Edmond cuts his science promo and does the elephant wail. In a major shock, no one says that he's a clever clogs, so even the writers have given up on this. Rebecca hops for a while as Edmond stands on the chair and thinking. I betcha Suzy wishes she could hear his thoughts, even though that is clearly invasion of privacy. Oh wait, the narrator was waiting after this to say that he is a clever clogs. How would you know that, Edmond didn't even say what he is thinking?! Gigi claims that it takes a lot of energy to think. No, it does not; unless your thinking is terrible. So, everyone grabs their plate and heads to the table of food with Gigi. We have bread, a toaster, a cup containing a hard boiled egg, yogurt, jam, cheese, cereal, orange juice, fruit, and carrots. Oh, and Rebecca is first. I betcha she picks the carrots. I check the video...Damn, I'm so good. Gigi called the cereal, porriage, so I'm guessing it was oatmeal. Danny loves cereal, Suzy loves toast (but no one does and somehow, the slices of beard are completely gone and there's only one left). Gigi does the time wasting segment of explaining how to operate a toaster safely completely with clock ticking sounds, and the toast pops out, flies into the air and lands on Suzy's plate.

So, yeah; Gigi's toaster is as old as she is. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Gigi's explaination is totally acceptable, but still it was done to waste some time. The kids are impressed as Peppa wants toast. I just love how they originally didn't like toast, despite eating beans on toast in a previous episode. The episode where Pedro perverted the Big Bong song into a western. So, now everyone wants toast and even Gigi realizes that this segment will take forever, so she brings in out of nowhere, the GOLDEN TOASTER OF DEATH~! I just love how it takes NINE slices of bread, instead of an even ten slices. Must be the old country's toaster. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Hey, it's not my fault Rhinokey is coming back to Ducktales 2020, sort of. Pedro calls it a super toaster. Somehow, the slices of bread are written in via teleport into the toaster, which leads to the kids having to catch the bread from the toaster and somehow Pedro caught his bread first. Danny Dog has to be crying in his apple juice on that one. I mean, the easiest contest in the world, and somehow PEDRO F'N PONY got his toast first? Danny wasn't even fourth in this. The kids want to do this again and Gigi says, eat the toast you have first. I think it's okay to tell them that you ran out of toast, since there looks to be no bread left. I should also note: when the kids go back to the table, glasses of milk and jars of spread are in via teleport as well. This has been a really sloppy episode continuity wise. So, everyone puts spread on their toast, Peppa opts for the Nintendo Switch way and I'm still wondering when we are going to get a Peppa Pig video game for that hybrid? So, everyone is happy as Gigi asks if they got the energy, and the kids cut various promos, but thank the spreads for the energy and not the toast itself. Gigi brings out the tape recorder and everyone goes outside to a tree area as Gigi wants them to do the breakfast bounce which is to copy what Gigi does. Oh, and speaking of Pedro F'N Pony: Remember when he played the Baked Bean song and how it was the Bing Bong song perverted into a western motif; and how I laughed until I cried...Well, Gigi plays the music of "Eat Your Five (Edmond: SEVEN!)" and she preverts it into a breakfast song. I howled with laughter when this happened. So, I no longer feel sorry for Gigi getting her song perverted, when she did the exact same thing here. They do exercises for a while and then stop and giggle to end the episode at 4:15 aired. Sadly, 15 seconds were cut, I assumed they made a joke and did the backsplash laugh. A really fun episode with a hilarious finish, but the continuity was all over the place here. *** 1/2 (75%).

Botanical Gardens: Here is episode #294 on the animation paper as we head to the botanical garden on the hill as the Pig family arrives with their boots on. Oh, come on show; you know most viewers know where this is going? Oh, and guess who the head gardner is? Come on, guess; it's too shocking! SURPRISE~! IT'S OKAY, BOOMER! POW! OUCH! Ummmm...It's Miss Rabbit. Even Mr. Bull wasn't this absurd. Why not make HIM the head gardener and stop this workaholic attitude of Miss Rabbit. Miss Rabbit is wearing a green hat as she welcomes everyone as they are flowers grown around the world. Yeah, I'll bet. So, we go inside and Daddy Pig is already complaining about the wild flower meadow being untidy despite the fact that that is the PURPOSE of a wild flower garden. Thankfully, Miss Rabbit rightfully blows him off for it, so even in Series 6; Daddy Pig is dumb. The butterflies and the bees are buzzing and in a shock, Daddy Pig isn't being chased by a wasp. So, even the writers have smarten up to it as we head into the hot house with the sand and the cacti, the palm trees and the Venus Flytrap. Which rhymes it....POW! OUCH! Ummmm... Thank you, that joke doesn't work expect on children's television directly. I was waiting with baited breath to see one of them snap and grab onto Daddy Pig's nose. They were just daring that happen. Sadly, only a fly got it. Not funny, and the burp isn't going to make it so. Peppa giggles and wants to cosplay a Venus Flytrap. Because, of course! Of course, George plays the fly and then the video STALLS for ten seconds, and then we start the cosplay. That wasn't the episode's fault, that was the video's fault. Then Peppa stops and then blows off George because Venus Flytraps do not run. Wait a second? Peppa was supposed to be the flytrap and George was supposed to be the fly. YOU PROJECTING LITTLE TROLL~! George rightfully bawls on cue for the first time in the Amelie Bea Smith era. And the narrator got totally confused and Peppa apologizes to him. You should; since you blamed him for doing what he was supposed to do, and then the narrator screwed up. Dammit! So, they both be flies, so I guess the adults are the flytraps now. Sounds reasonable to me. Oh, and Daddy Pig is blushing, a sign of the heat getting to him; so it's time to go into the next room which is a snowy field filled with little plant life, called a coldhouse and all the pigs shiver of course. It's officially called an Artric Tundra Garden.

Next, we see ice lollies and ice cream cones sticking in the snow as Peppa asks if they grow this at the North Pole, and Miss Rabbit points out that their freezer is broken. George and Peppa get free ice cream and they lick it, causing Mummy Pig to literally shiver either at the sight, or the narrator's promo. It's hard to tell, actually. So, next up is the rain forest garden with lots of plants and butterflies. So, it's called a rain forest because it's the forest that has a lot of rain and it rains every hour on the hour, which is controlled by Miss Rabbit. And it rains, so yeah, the boots have come in handy, despite the lack of coats. Daddy Pig demonstrates his moronicness again by claiming that they need something like this at home and Mummy Pig gleefully retorts that one for me. A shower, everyone; which I will need after this rant is over. So the video stalls again for five seconds as we head inside the experiment room with Mr. Rabbit (speaking of multi-tasking...) as the botanical research scientist. So, his job is to be God...ERRRR....I mean, make new plants as we get a demonstration of the bees and butterflies collecting pollen and flowers making seeds and such. Peppa smells a purple flower and it smells awesome, Mummy Pig smells a pink plant and gets nothing. Apparently, Mummy Pig has either a stuffy nose, or that plant has no smell. It's the later as the small flower is purple/pink with the smell. It's a lot more complicated than that, being plant DNA; but it's a start. Sadly, Dr. Rabbit's carrot skills need more work; since he couldn't make a big tasty carrot and the experiment ended with a small not tasty carrot. Everyone sighs on cue. So, after some silliness, we head to the children's garden as Miss Rabbit proclaims that the garden has one awesome feature. It's not the gnomes, not a water fall, but a giant muddy puddle as we jump cut to Candy Cat, Rebecca Rabbit, Danny Dog, Suzy Sheep, Emily Elephant, Zoe Zebra, Freddy Fox and of course, Pedro F'N Pony jumping up and down in muddy puddle. Why are you surprised? This is the show's giant money shot moment since the first episode of this series! George and Peppa like this and of course they jump in as we see Mrs. Zebra and Mrs. Elephant in the background watching on. Everyone giggles to end the episode at 4:30. Outside of Peppa's really awful troll job, this episode was great actually. **** (80%).

Doctor Hamster's Big Present: Here is episode #300 on the animation paper as we head to the vet on the hill as Daddy Pig's car arrives with Mummy Pig, Peppa and George getting out and going in because it's time for Goldie the goldfish's checkup. I'm almost ready to pre-judge and say that I expect Tittles the Tortoise to climb up a tree again, because Doctor Hamster is clueless when it comes to turtles. So, the three go inside and in a shock, we meet Grampy Rabbit with his fish tank containing an orange newt named Nigel. Which has a plant which looks similar to the Belly Bombs from Teddy Ruxpin. Nigel also squeak like Rebecca Rabbit as the animals all meet and greet. And I'm not lying by omission here. Jump cut to outside Doctor Hamster's door as DH is talking to Constable Gray Squirrel and her blue carney who just needs rest to be able to sing like one, hence my theory on the bird type. Gray Squirrel leaves and thankfully, there are no lamp posts within 50 kms of this place, or Doctor Hamster might really have trouble, because GS has no concept of the rule "POST NO BILLS"! So, Nigel is next and the fish tank is put on a table, and Doctor Hamster doesn't even need three seconds to determine that Nigel is fine and getting exercise. Doctor Hamster then admits that she is worried about her health and wants something to get more exercise with. If you cannot guess what it is; then you don't understand stereotypes and need to grow up. Grampy Rabbit suggests jogging and also to do it in the office. DH likes it and starts jogging on the spot and then jog around while Grampy Rabbit leaves. In comes the Pig family with Goldie as DH still jogs around and even Peppa thinks this is silly. DH finally stops to catch her breath and seems to be slipping according to her. Goldie's fine and needs to drink lots of water, even though it's a fish in a bowl filled with water. Her medical expertise is slipping; maybe she needs a remedial course instead of jogging. Although she can study while jogging; that would be fine. The Pig family says goodbye and leaves as we jump cut to the boring road with Mummy Pig driving the car west with Peppa and George in the backseat; along with Goldie. So, then we see Grampy Rabbit jogging with Nigel, and Nigel looks beyond nervous here. Mummy asks if Grampy wants a lift, Grampy no sells because he's keeping healthy and fit. I'm more worried about Nigel's mental state while he's jogging.

Anyhow; Mummy Pig points out the flaw in Doctor Hamster's plan to get fit and Grampy Rabbit has a plan of his own and we head to Grampy Rabbit's boatyard...and yes, Grampy Rabbit jogged all the way there and still outran Mummy Pig's car. This guy is awesome. So, he brings out pieces of junk and Mummy Pig calls it rubbish and this gravely offends Grampy Rabbit. So, Grampy uses the wooden hammer to bend the ladders into shape and doing shop work on this new invention as Peppa stands there and guessing various objects, which she is wrong, although her guess was the closest to the right answer. Of course, George thinks it's a dinesaur, because of course! It's not, according to Grampy. He then wraps up the present and rolls it onto it's side. Sadly, it won't fit in the car, so they have to roll it; which is basically, work it. So, we head back to Doctor Hamsters vet which the narrator called it a surgery. Granted, vets do offer that option, but I'm sure it isn't the only option she has. Oh, and everyone literally walked to the vet. So yes, even the writers have embarrassed themselves so much to not have someone outrun a motor vehicle. Too bad, since the joke hasn't worn out it's welcome. They enter the office as Doctor Hamster is shown the gift and she opens to reveal....a hamster wheel. Yes, a hamster wheel; which Grampy Rabbit created for her to jog. Grampy Rabbit just buried Doctor Hamster right there, folks. Grampy drills it into the wall, Doctor Hamster just accepts it and runs on the wheel, loving this. I shake my head, you just rendered her into a big stereotype and nothing more. And the announcer even buries her further just to seal her fate at 4:15. A complete burial of Doctor Hamster, and they were better off just letting Tittles climb a tree again. * 1/2 (30%).

The Electric Car: We finish this rant series up with episode #304 on the animation paper as the episode opens at the little house on the hill. Zoom into Peppa's bedroom as Peppa is playing with Teddy and George is playing with a toy car that works on batteries. The car not only rides by itself, it sings a song...and then the car dies as Peppa -- the troll that she is -- declares the car broken. George looks into the hard camera and bawls his eyes out as Mummy Pig comes in asking what is the matter. George shows the car and Mummy Pig notices the batteries are dead and replaces them. Apparently, the new batteries are defective because the car doesn't sing anymore. The kids don't care as a car horn blares out and everyone runs out as Daddy Pig arrives in a cyan blue car and Peppa -- the troll that she is -- acts like it's not Daddy Pig driving the car before catching herself. Daddy Pig gets out and explains the brand new funny car called an electric car, which runs on batteries instead of petro. George is still impressed anyway, despite problems with his toy car earlier. So, everyone gets into the car for the TEST DRIVE OF DOOM, but the car dies. George does not bawl on cue this time as Daddy Pig proclaims that it doesn't need a new battery, but a recharge as he takes out a long, giant cord and plugs it into the kitchen. Oh, and it recharges in ten seconds flat to the kids' amusement. Switch takes four hours to fully recharge, so I call BS on this. I should note that it looks nothing like George's toy car, as it has orange tyres and yellow rims while George's toy car is dark blue. Daddy Pig gets back in and we go to the boring road, as this is no different from every drive from the series. Peppa comments on how quiet it is and Daddy Pig states that they are quiet until they start talking...and then suddenly, the electric car goes into Dora The Explorer mode and addresses itself as Roger. To the show's credit, Peppa acts like this has happened before since she did interact with the Camper Van in Series 3. So, basically, this electric car is also a driver less car according to Roger and Roger demonstrates this as they go through some hills and no one can stop this insane car...

Except for Officer Panda and Officer Gray Squrriel of course. UH-OH! Daddy Pig is about to become a criminal...AGAIN! The officers notice that Daddy Pig is not using the steering wheel and Daddy Pig claims that he is not driving the car. Which in storyline is true. Officer Panda claims Daddy Pig is driving the car and we get the other children on the playground level arguing which these two should have outgrown by the age of five. Okay, if there is some law against driverless cars in this show, I would be on the officers side, otherwise; the police can go pound sand. Panda decides to talk to the car and of course Roger speaks as Peppa claims that it is very nice. I would be suspious about that line there, knowing Peppa the last six seasons. Officer Panda points out that the car itself must have a drivers license to drive the car by itself. And Roger's arm shows off his license and this show has now jumped the shark. I knew this was coming, but darn, it took so long. So, the officers are fine with this and let Roger go drive away stage right. Next up, George demonstrates the singing car -- which didn't sing after the batteries were replaced -- and Roger demonstrates his singing skills and they are no worse than Peppa's. So, we sing and drive until it's AFTER HAPPY HOUR and then Daddy asks where they are as they go up the hill to the little house on the hill, and Roger remembers to park on the steepest side of the hill, just to complete the shark jumping. Everyone gets out as the family except Peppa head into the house. Peppa asks if Roger will be all right in the night and Roger says yes. Peppa heads into the house to end the episode at 4:15. I did like this episode, however; I'm taking a running bet that we'll never see Roger again after this. *** (60%).

Interesting Moment #1: Apparently, a new character named Charlotte Sheep (voiced by Mandeep Dhillon) is coming to Peppa Pig in the future as well. According to Wikipedia (DANGER! DANGER!): Mandeep Dhillon is a British actress who has appeared in Some Dogs Bite (2010), Tears of Kali (2004), and the BBC Three comedy TV series Some Girls and Fried. She is also known for her appearances in the British romantic comedy Finding Fatimah in 2017, and as Constable Lizbyet Corwi in The City and the City in 2018. In March 2019, she appeared as Sandy in Ricky Gervais's Netflix Original dark-comedy After Life. Mandeep Dhillon attended Wilbury Primary School and Fearnhill School, Letchworth.[1] Her first television appearance was in Some Dogs Bite (2010),[2] and she made her film debut in Tears of Kali (2004). She starred as the character Saz Kaur in Some Girls, which aired on BBC Three. Mandeep went on to appear as a guest character in 7 episodes of the 2014 TV series 24: Live Another Day, alongside Kiefer Sutherland, and in 2017 she appeared in the British romantic comedy film Finding Fatimah.[3] Dhillon played the main character Constable Lizbyet Corwi in of the four part BBC Drama The City and the City in 2018, alongside David Morrissey who played her police partner, Inspector Tyador Borlú.[4] She began her career with Tears of Kali (Clerk at Teehouse) and She-Male Trouble: Ugly in 2004. She also appeared on Doctor Who in a cameo role. Red Dwarf as Cat Cleric is her most recent credit. She has 40 Acting credits, 4 Self credits and 1 Archive Footage credit to her resume.


THE REVIEW LINE

So; despite all the surprises packed in this episode, I was disappointed because they had to drag Doctor Brown Bear into another sick patient angle in a season where he could of just tell the family on the phone to go to the hospital and not risk killing himself. I also didn't find this drama to be all amusing and having Pedro break his leg again was depressing. Father Christmas was perfectly fine though and Mr. Bull was great here for a change. Overall, a slightly above average episode. Still better than Doctor Hamster's Big Present which was a complete and total burial of Doctor Hamster. As much as I don't like her cluelessness towards turtles, she was at least a characters. And this episode also made me hate Grampy Rabbit after all the great things he did on this show in past episode, he stooped to a stereotype build and Doctor Hamster fell for it. Shameful! Botanical Gardens was also great outside of Peppa's troll job on George, so; yes we have three instances in Series 6 where George cries and this one really made me annoyed at Peppa herself. I also liked Breakfast club, but it was all over the place continuity wise. The last two were the usual, although I did think the Valentine's Day one was better on the second viewing since I finally understood how everyone knew that Daddy Pig didn't get a post card. It wasn't a logic break, it was Peppa trolling.

Okay, for now that is it for Peppa Pig. There is an episode called Viking Day, but there is no video footage at this time (I have seen the episode and it's a **** episode showing that sometimes Grandpa Pig is right about Granny Pig's social gatherings). So, I wait for more and since I'm going to be home this week and maybe for the forseeable future unless things blow over, I'm returning to ranting for the first time in a full time cap. I might finish the Ducktales 2017 DVD set and maybe find Sky Pirates...In The Sky and present it as a TaleSpin episode as well. Oh, and if Kit is the father of Huey, Dewey and Louie, don't say I didn't warn you all. So...

Thumbs up for Botanical Gardens and Miss Rabbit's Relaxation Class, thumbs down for Doctor Hamster's Big Present and thumbs in the middle for the rest and I'll see you all next time.

 

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