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Sony Always Wins, Baby~! 2019 Edition Part II

Reviewed: 04/16/2022

The Final Descent~!


Okay, we finally end the skits with a 2021 video, pretty much the last major video and you can tell Nin10doUltra was fed up due to the length. It's basically 2022 exclusives on Nintendo Switch, including the first footage of Bayonetta 3 after 4 1/2 years of radio silence. Now, all we need is footage of Metroid Prime 4 and Detective Pikachu 2; and we are all set. Plus, two bonus episodes including one that I never saw before that caused so much misdirection that I thought it was something that it was not. Also, Waluigi is in Smash...as an assist trophy. HA! So, let's rant on shall we...?


"Nintendo Switch Hater Reacts to Switch 2022 Exclusives": This episode aired on September 27th, 2021 and is officially the last SAW video in existance. You can tell the bloom is off the rose at this point as NAW is watching the laptop from the computer chair and is impressed by the last Nintendo Direct. Personally, it was a good Direct, but that's not newsworthy anymore. It's only when Nintendo does something stupid, or Nintendo loses to Sony and/or Microsoft once on the NPD charts, that it becomes news. Because Nintendo dominating is routine, you see. In comes SAW and Nin10doUltra clearly didn't want to do this video because he's wearing the same outfit as NAW now. That's a sign that the skits are done. SAW is insecure as usual and NAW literally asks him if he's all right. It might be time to cut this cluster B vampire NAW off, nothing good will come out of this. SAW is making it sound like playing Nintendo games is a bad thing, and ironically projecting himself as a spoiled little brat in the process. NAW namedrops Bayonetta 3, which finally got gameplay footage for the first time in four years. SAW calls it dogwater, and the graphics are awful despite the game not even being released until 2022. Splatoon 3 is next, it's for kids. Well, he does have a point there, NAW. Didn't you see the Splatoon commercial?! It's not like Nintendo is hiding it or anything. Apparently, SAW hates JRPG's and Zobe70 would be fuming when he heard that one. Triangle Stragedy, everyone. NAW namedrops Pokemon and SAW blows it off. NAW is pissed off now and this is SAW's chance to basically prove his point that NAW is just a manchild who loves kid games and hates being a man basically. Projection much there, SAW?! NAW has had enough of this kiddie crap and calls SAW out for playing Ratchet & Clank on PlayStation 5, a kids game. Then there is Keena, which NAW points out that it looks like something straight out of a Disney game. NAW is not wrong about this. SAW proclaims that the system has sold over 80 million units and will reach 100 million units. SAW denies it. Spoiler Alert: It reached over 103 million units and is only 14 million units from surpassing PS4. Only PS2 for Sony is left to beat, along with Nintendo DS and Gameboy/Gameboy Color combination. Don't ask me why Nintendo combined them together. NAW wants to bet on it and SAW is like "nope" and starts to leave. NAW asks him again and SAW tells him to shut his mother****ing mouth. Yeah, the dolphin sound effect from Spongebob was used here. SAW leaves and that is that as we go to greyscale with NAW wondering why SAW cussed at him as he realizes that SAW chose violence for no reason to end the video. Yeah, this video was not good. There really wasn't much of anything to it.

That ends the SAW skits, except for one skit that I never actually saw until now. So, as a bonus video, I present:

"The Nintendo Switch Hater Remedial Class": Oh heck, yeah! This is the only skit I have never seen, let along reviewed. This aired on June 24th, 2019, after the Nintendo E3 2019 Direct that is considered the best E3 Direct Nintendo ever released. So, let's just say the haters were so fizzling out at this point, this class is basically the class to get SAW's heat back. At least in theory. We begin as NAW, the teacher of this class comes in to address SAW and the other Switch haters. One of them suggested that the show was decent, and amazingly enough, NAW understands him and just moves on. Second one apparently loved Witcher III and NAW just let's it go. SAW then proclaims that the thing is trash and that's enough for NAW to tell him to get the hell out of his class. SAW refuses to leave, so NAW puts him in a body bag (!!!) that we don't see and basically beats him to death off-screen since everyone is played by the same person. This should happen to Danhausen in AEW when he officially feuds with Hook: Hook puts him in a body bag and beats him up all the way to the locker room. So, someone liked Astral Chain, and it's not his thing to buy a Switch, so NAW is fine with that. Another one liked Pokemon, but Sony is still better; which NAW points out that Sony was not at E3 because they had nothing to show, according to Michael Pachter. Then again, Pachter is a Sony shill, so expect him to declare Sony is doomed and then hope that what his critic say about him is true and he saves his meal ticket, or if that doesn't happen; he predicted something right, making the critics look bad. This is why no one wants to deal with him, he's a vampire. NAW does have a point though, and someone claims that Sony Always Wins since the dawn of time. So, basically NAW realizes that he is on drugs or something, decides to show some mercy and order him to the nurse's office to check on his head. After some blow offs and threats of body bagging, that one leaves without incident. Someone admits that Sony never won because they weren't there, which is a fair statement. NAW allows this one and now it's starting to dawn on me that this is the infamous Nintendo Switch Rehabilitation Center Nin10doUltra was talking about back in the "Switch Haters Are Dancing For A System They Don't Even Like" video back in 2017. So, another one becomes SAW Mark 2 and you can guess the result before I even typed it. NAW is flustered, but he tells everyone that class is dismissed and there's a quiz tomorrow, so he'll see them tomorrow to end the video. Wow, I was expecting one thing from the title in that being Bias Confirmation basically throwing out dudes who didn't need the class and trying to brainwash them into Nintendo haters again; and I got basically the "Nintendo Switch Rehabilitation Center" in full form. Okay, then.

"Waluigi Fans React To Waluigi Not Being Playable In Super Smash Brothers Ultimate": Also, a bonus video that aired on June 21st, 2018, after the Nintendo E3 2018 Direct; which included the Super Smash Brothers Ultimate main event that went on forever. EVERYONE IS HERE~! However, WAW (Waluigi Always Wins) had to ruin it for everyone. Consider them the toxic Smashers if you will. I could go over all of the horrible incidents of Smash fans and competitors being horrible people/psychopaths; but we would be here all day and this rant would go on forever. We begin with WAW waking up from his long slumber because this is the day that Super Smash Brothers comes back. I have already done a full rant on this Direct as well, and to be honest; I have said my piece on the whole incident, so this is more of the gory details. WAW is obessed with Waluigi being in Smash as a fighter because they want Smash to be a serious fighting game, even though the entire appeal of Smash is the chaos surrounding the fighters. WAW goes to the bathroom and gets prepared while chanting Waluigi In Smash over and over. I admit that I was expecting literally anything from Sakurai at this point, so Waluigi was a good choice as a Smash fighter as any at this point, even as an echo fighter to Wario. Sakurai does love Fire Emblem though. Personally, I would be grabbing a bowl of popcorn and my favorite soda drink, but brushing teeth is fine; because kink shaming is wrong. Jump cut back to the computer room as WAW opens the door and heads inside. He sits down on his chair and proclaims that he is ready to suck on some Walugi toes. Oooookkkkkaaaayyyyy. WAW is loving life as the Spongebob Narrator sequence comes back with five minutes later. WHAT?! I'm certain the "Everyone Is Here" took up the first five minutes of that main event segment. I think it was more like ten minutes later. WAW is crossing his finger double time, which is a sign that Waluigi is not going to be a fighter.

So, we wait for it...and Walugi IS IN SMASH....AS AN ASSIST TROPHY~! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Damn, that was cold; at least make a Mii costume for him, Sakurai! YOU DID THAT WITH DOOM SLAYER~! WAW is so pissed off that he is going to choose violence and he don't care who he hurts. WAW goes to twitter and writes to Sakurai that he is going to rip out his spinal cord, then use a chainsaw to rip him to pieces. Am I reading a death threat post from a Foresnic Files episode or something? Oh, and he will sell the dismembered body parts on-line if Waluigi is not a fighter. WAW clearly does not watch Foresnic Files and he needs to learn right away. WAW tells him to not play with him this time as he then calls up his WABIAS buddy on his cellphone as they exchange death notes for a while. WABIAS says some racist comments about Sakurai that I'm surprised didn't get this Youtube video removed actually. I'm not going to diginify them here, you'll know when you watch the video itself. Oh, and WABIAS is tired of Waluigi getting disrespected (as if Nintendo cared about Waluigi other than making him as a lazy foil for Luigi in multi-player games) as members of some forum have a plane ticket to Japan. Oh, crap! He basically is going to see Sakurai and torture him into putting Waluigi as a fighter in Smash, assuring that he might be cut altogether from future Smash games. Also, it will be treated like a "budget cut" deal that Sakurai was talking about. So, Spongebob narrator sequence ensues as this is eight hours later as NAW shows up with his baseball cap backwards. I love you NAW, but Kit Cloudkicker does it better. I'm just saying. Anyhow, NAW is in bed checking his laptop for Nintendo Switch stuff on Twitter and NAW is appalled by all these death threats sent to Sakurai. One of them threatens to cut off his throat, one of them threatens to rape his wife and of course, NAW has zero choice but to report that one. One of them wants to tie him to a chair and cut off his testicles. NAW is amazed by this and even SAW in the voice over agrees with him! The ONE time both SAW and NAW actually got along. Only WAW could make this possible. Shaking my head, indeed! That ends the video.

And that is all of them! Maybe Nin10doUltra will do a few more in the future; but considering how it's easier to quote them with an annoying voice than doing satire, it is for the best to end them now. Besides, Nin10doUltra did a video on the Nintendo haters being extinct and I had to point out that this is not true and they decided to pick on XBOX instead. Since Sony fans are now making a scene against XBOX, Vokren has a great series of Salt videos of Sony cockroaches being as toxic as humanly possible.

 

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