Return to 50 Webs
Disclaimer#1: All images, characters and material is (C) 1990/1991 Walt Disney Company and is being used without permission. The webmaster has made sure that no money was made in the creation of this web page and that all material used here is used with the up most affection and respect to the Walt Disney Company and the Tale Spin Team.
Disclaimer#2: The views expressed here are solely the views of the webmaster and no one else. The webmaster has no intentions to change anyone's minds about a particular subject and respects the views of the viewers. Comments about this and other editorial can be E-Mail at gweagle@eastlink.ca or signing the Cloudkicker guest book.
The Adventures Of Teddy Ruxpin: The Black Box
Reviewed: 02/23/2019
That's TWEEG~!
It's finally the time to hit rock bottom for Quellor and MAVO as today's episode features Gimmick and Grubby discovering memories of the seventh crystal and Tweeg stealing the Black Box and making his dreams literally come true. Seriously; this is not a lie. This is so Donald Trump-equse and it's a heel organization. So; how does this episode fare? Let's rant on shall we...?
Episode opens with an eastern pan shot of Leekee Lake and the Hermit's Island with heavenly music playing, along with a fish jumping up and down into the lake. Scene change to the forest and then we see Teddy pulling out seedweed from the Subwater Boat and one of the vines snap and Teddy does a push back bump into the water, as the Hermit is apparently scrubbing the inside of the Subwater Boat since he has a brush with soap on the bristles. I would say he's taking a bath; but he has all his clothes on. Teddy's binded by the vines, wake up the whoosh with the Hermit of the night. POW! OUCH! Ummmm... So, it's time to eat as Hermit and Teddy sit down with bowls of what the Hermit calls the Chewy Vegetable, and Teddy doesn't looked thrilled to be eating it. Probably because it's green and it might be confused with eating a load of Tweeg. POW! OUCH! Ummmm... Teddy claims Grubby would love this and wonders where it's from. Hermit proclaims that he'll show him where after lunch as Teddy is not eating the stuff and before we can get his reaction to the food, we scene change to Gimmick Valley and then pan northeast to Tweeg Tower as Tweeg is repairing the cannon again. Oh goody! My favorite spot in this whole show: Tweeg trying to destroy Gimmick's house with a cannon that has an absolute zero percent hit rate. Tweeg is using the screwdriver and proclaims that he is going to knock the glasses off Gimmick's nose, implying that he is out for Gimmick's blood in roundabout terms. Sadly; he gets in the cannon and breaks the screwdriver. Wow; what dollar store in Grundo did Tweeg steal this screwdriver from?! Oh wait; Tweeg then accuses LB of stealing this screwdriver and gets all mad and everything. In comes LB calling him Tweeze. Tweeg gets on LB's case about the broken screwdriver and LB asks if it isn't beautiful. Tweeg threatens to not pay LB if he doesn't go to Gimmick's house to steal another one; so LB asks if he does steal it, will he get paid and Tweeg basically says that he didn't say that. Of course! Tweeg orders LB to steal and tells him not to doddle. LB is claiming that he is picking bad habits from him, but that is probably is why he likes hanging around with him. Cue Vinny laugh and LB bails stage right. Scene change to the lake as the Subwater boat is making sounds now and there are two air pipes pumping air into the diving costumes of Teddy and the Hermit as they are underwater. Hermit motions Teddy to follow him.
Hermit also calls Teddy by his last name, like Teddy and Grubby call Newton Gimmick by his last name. The Hermit shows off an underground ruins where he planted a garden of all those veggies Teddy had to taste and is still tasting them. Hermit decides to pick some of the veggies as Teddy backs away and slips on the out of nowhere conveniently placed rock and falls backwards into some seaweed and in front of an entrance to some cave. This was so devastating that Teddy's head is colored like the Hermit's for a few seconds. Teddy gets up and notices that there is a cave that goes on forever and since he's a curious Illiop (which the Hermit calls him out on; which Teddy kindly calls projection on the Hermit), he wants to walk in and see where it leads. And that is exactly what the Hermit and Teddy do. Hermit still has memory problems I see. And speaking of memory problems and useless gadgets, we head to Gimmick's workshop upstairs with Newton Gimmick wearing a strap light on his head and using a screwdriver that has three flat heads shafts on it. It looks like he created this to unscrew screws and eat pasta with it afterwards. Fuzz is on a shelf watching Grubby pace around and complain. Gimmick is using the fork screwdriver on the Black Box as he proclaims that science cannot be rushed; but Grubby wants lunch now as he rubs his stomach. Fuzz has full confidence in Gimmick's abilities, which means he has more naivete than me. Suddenly; out of nowhere, Gimmick is now reading the Crystal Book despite not seeing it once in this scene until now. What?! Grubby steals the book (now that's just plain rude) and flips the page to a picture of what appears to be the seventh crystal, only without the crack inside. Sadly; we never got a follow up to why the seventh crystal had that crack in the first place. Gimmick takes out the crystal as they deduce that outside of the crack, the crystal in the picture is identical. Grubby then claims that it's merely similar because it doesn't have the funny glow. Gimmick puts the crystal in his hand and suddenly the crystal starts to glow and shoots a beam from it, for no reason at all. The beam shows off an image of the Hard To Find City, only it shows various Illiops in various dresses, and this confuses Grubby to no end. Because in the Hard To Find City, there is only Gutangs. This believe it or not, finally got paid off in the final episode of the series. Now; we get to a very confusing part.
And no; Illiops using modern machinery in an ancient setting is not one of them. It's a moment that pretty much sets the tone for the major stake since Teddy met the Hermit in To The Rescue: We head to a meadow as a little Illiop in red overalls and a grey shirt runs and leaps into a young mother with blond hair and they both wave as the background is basically Teddy's house before it disappears with sparkle effects. Now; there are two problems with this: The dialogue is messed up as it implies that Fuzz already knows that this is Teddy as a child even though Grubby has the closest relationship. I would have wrote this as Grubby asking: "Wait? Is that...Teddy? And is that...Ilana?" because that would be more realistic and also make the scene more surprising. The story is that someone's memories of Teddy and Ilana in their younger years exist within the seventh crystal. Why? In a way, we would soon find out in the next episode since a very important moment happens in that episode. The second problem is and this require massive spoiler alerts: If this is Burl Ruxpin's memories; then this means Burl was in the Hard To Find City, and the Gutangs invasion was recent. Unless, there are two different memories by two different Illiops. Grubby is wondering about this image and Gimmick stammers because he really cannot explain it and doesn't want to look like a dumb scientist. Oh wait; he explains it and Grubby has a headache, because Gimmick hates dumbing himself down, but is too cowardly to admit it. Fuzz wants to tell Teddy about this anyway and Gimmick puts the crystal back in the Black Box; as Grubby is not thrilled to return to Leekee Lake a couple of days early. Wait; hasn't it been a couple days already? Whomever is writing this isn't doing a good job of telling time here. Scene change to the living room as Grubby is making sandwiches with green slime spread while Gimmick is checking a large sack of something something. Pan to the front door being open as LB comes in to prepare to practice the fine art of not being seen. Sadly; Grubby and Gimmick have such selective hearing that they do not hear the sound effects of LB hopping in and hopping upstairs. Maybe Gimmick should see Eunice on that soon. LB calls Gimmick a screwy guy as he notices the table with the Black Box on it. LB hops over, takes the Black Box with the horn and hops down to claim that crime don't pay.
Cue Vinny laugh, scene change to Tweeg still trying to fix the cannon so it might have a 10% hit rate rather than a 0% hit rate. Remind me to call the New York Times in the event that actually happens, because that would be a major news story. Now the cannon has a large shaft like lever (CLEVER CLOGS~!) as he pushes it and the butt end of the cannon bashes his foot for the contracted foot grabbing spot. In comes LB with the Black Box, mocking Tweet for doing the latest Grunge Dance, which means Tweeg is only half culture-apporating it, rather than fully doing it. LB proclaims that he brought the whole toolbox for Twist and he head tosses it and the handle smashes Tweeg's other foot, so more foot grabbing because Tweeg fails at life as usual. Tweeg blows off LB and then gets the TOING OF BLOODY CLAIRTY because he now has the Black Box. Tweeg grabs the Black Box and is so happy because it's Quellor's property, so if he returns it Quellor will makes him member of MAVO for life! DA DA DAAAAAAAAAA! Oh, you don't know the half of this, Tweet! LB is all confused; but as long as it pays him, he's happy. So; it's off to MAVO, the organization who wants nothing to do with him anymore. Scene change back to Teddy attending to the Subwater Boat, basically polishing it. He's so done with it as the Hermit was polishing the inside of it. Teddy asks if there is anything left to do and Hermit has one thing he would love to do and we scene change to the Subwater Boat being on the lake as Hermit and Teddy are riding on top and having the time of their lives. Somehow; the Hermit is more into it than Teddy is; but he still cannot remember much of anything. Well; that's what happens when you are senile. I mean, his memories couldn't have been erased by something, could they? Teddy pushes the middle button on the console and the boat goes into a tailspin (BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!) which is so devastating that it causes half of the buttons to change into bright colors. The next closeup changes them back, sadly as Hermit pushes the bottom left button and the two do a flip bump over the controls and then laugh out loud. Probably the only time the Hermit had a hearty laugh over this. Jump cut to a stylized seagull looking on, wondering why it's even there.
Teddy pushes around button as the Subwater Boat float into the air in such an awkward matter that Teddy opens the hatch, both he and the Hermit dives into the submarine and seal the hatch. And yes; it's time for the TEDDY RUXPIN SONG OF DOOM, a tribute to the Subwater Boat, which is officially named here. Wow; they compared the Subwater Boat's speed to an otter as it dives straight down into the water as Hermit names several sea creatures which basically have the word Grundo on them. And you thought Fish Hooks was shameless in their Fish x stuff?! Oh wait; there's the Peanut Butter Jellyfish. I'm not going to make the obvious insult on that one. Teddy is as confused as I am, despite clearly seeing a fish made from a peanut butter sandwich. I think the Hermit wins that one we get more wacky diving and coming up. Then Hermit just loses it as we see a literal school containing fish and the song just crashes and drowns in it's own absurdity...leading to Gimmick at the fish tank feeding the fish while his face looks like a blob. Now that's a funny segueway. It also causes one of the fish in the next scene to literally change color on cue. Up comes Grubby and Fuzz as they exchange notes and Gimmick is still feeding the fish. However; this conversation is taking a dark turn because none of the three babyfaces packed the Black Box carefully; therefore, someone stole it. Grubby panics to end the segment 10 minutes in. I would have paid to see Fuzz try to pack a suitcase, that would have been BUYS~! A decent episode thus far, although the animation mess is coming back.
After the commercial break; we see Grubby preparing the Airship and putting supplies in their proper places. In comes Gimmick with a sack that is clearly bigger than his body weight as he tells Grubby to be careful, since it has really, really fragile science equipment. More fragile than bigoted special snowflakes, I presume. However; Gimmick should be the one who needs the careful lessons because he trips on the conveniently placed rock and the bag goes flying. Grubby grabs it with ease as Gimmick gets up and gets on the ship; going to be on stove duty. Apparently; Fuzz isn't coming on this trip despite in the last episode being in the Airship. So, Gimmick talks like a scientist and Grubby basically says he understood it, even though he didn't and we lift up and the next stop is Leekee Lake. Okay; now we head to MAVO Headquarters outside as Tweeg's wagon arrives with Tweeg holding the Black Box in front of him with LB following him. They head to the double doors and Tweeg is so cocky that he hides the box in his cloak. Why? Why not? Tweeg knocks on the door and the door opens to reveal Iggly as Tweeg is literally blowing him off like a monster heel. Wow; that is an actual improvement from him. Maybe this Black Box grants fail at life heels the ability to succeed in life. That's not a good thing for Tweeg I might add. Iggly blows him off in kind as Tweeg demands to see Quellor at once. Iggly: Article 25 Subsection 37.Tweeg: GET LOST~! Wait; shouldn't he be arrested and put in the dungeon again? Don't forget the POINTY FINGER OF DEATH before slamming the door in Tweeg's face. LB is impressed in a sarcastic way and Tweeg tells LB to bound off a cliff, and then stammers on the obvious punchline. I guess with Tweeg, even the Black Box cannot perform 100% miracles. LB then tells him to just show him the Black Box and Tweeg looks like he's ready to slug LB (which he would fail; because...you guessed it). This is somehow enough for Iggly to open the door and looks shocked and appalled. Tweeg takes out the Black Box, shows it to him and Iggly just screams and bails. Oh; and there actually is a storyline reason for that and you'll see it in the next episode. Tweeg acts like he won and then he and LB walk in with Tweeg putting the Black Box in front of him to taunt everyone. Head to the throne room with Quellor on the throne. Drudge is there as well as Iggly is in front of Quellor acting all scared and is stammering like mad. What a whimp?!
I mean; it's only Tweeg after all. I can understand Miss Maggotheart being a little scared since the one time Tweeg actually nailed someone with the cannon was in fact Miss Maggotheart's wagon. Quellor is not amused and orders Iggly to throw someone in the dungeon as monsters in the room that we didn't see earlier bail outside stage left because here comes Tweeg with the Black Box in front of him. Now if you recall from the previous episodes, Quellor needs the Black Box because without it, the monsters don't see him as a threat and therefore they no longer have to really obey him. Remember that because we will finally find out how to become the Surpeme Oppressor in this storyline. Tweeg proclaims that they love him, they really, really love him. Wow; the comparsions between Tweeg and Trump are so similar, I betcha Tweeg will be become the Surpeme Oppressor and react the same way Trump became US president thirty years later. Tweeg shows Quellor the Black Box and Quellor then acts like a scared rabbit and demands the guards seize Tweeg at once. LB tries to bail; but Drudge cuts him off. Iggly tries to grab it, and then stops causing Quellor to get even more angry. And then Iggly reveal Paragraph 17 of the MAVO bylaws which state that the Surpeme Oppressor must have the Black Box at all times. Now; I wish they book the spot with Iggly also stating that the one with the Black Box can forfeit the box to Quellor (The current Surpeme Oppressor) if he/she so chooses. The reason for that is to eliminate the logic break that if any monster gets the Black Box (like Dredge for example in the last episode, which is why I was saying that it was better that Quellor get it himself and obey Dredge instead), but doesn't want to be Surpeme Oppressor, they could simply give the box to the SO. Then, when Tweeg hears this, he basically refuses to give the Black Box back and becomes the Surpeme Oppressor outright as Iggly declares. Everyone is outright shocked at this and Tweeg acts with modesty for the first time, although like he is confident. Iggly then asks Tweeg for his first orders and LB calls this a bad dream. Trust me LB; even Tweeg as Surpeme Oppressor is better than Donald Trump being president in the real world. Tweeg makes his orders to take Quellor and throw him in the dungeon. Iggly sells it and grabs Quellor by the ankles and drags him out of the throne room as Quellor protests this outrage and Iggly gleefully retorts on that one.
Quellor has literally hit rock bottom as a heel now and MAVO along with it. How can anyone boo Tweeg now; since his dreams came true? LB proclaims that this is not so bad now as he leaps into the throne and decides to enjoy the show. What show? So, we head into the dungeon area as Drudge is now with Quellor as Quellor decides to accept his fate and bury himself even further. Drudge shoves Quellor, Quellor is blowing him off, Drudge don't care because Tweeg is the Surpeme Oppressor now. Quellor is now panicking because Tweeg doesn't know how to use the Black Box and he could destroy MAVO. Really? I thought the organization was in deep doo-doo the second it got defeated by an Illiop and bags of popcorn? Then we get a horrible continuity error: Drudge pushes Quellor into a prison cell, and the sky shot they used made it as if Drudge shoved him into the hall where the prison cells are, but the remainder of the scene acts like Drudge was in the hall and Quellor was in a prison cell. BAD! Drudge tells him to stay put before Drudge bails and Quellor wants Drudge's brain. EEEWWWWWW! Oh wait, Drudge doesn't have one, so it's not so gross. So, in four minutes; Tweeg's dreams come true after many episodes having such dellusions of becoming MAVO's top dog, MAVO has lost all credibility with itself and Quellor has no credibility as a heel anymore. And to think, MAVO is the #1 heel group for the rest of the series. What a plummet?! Scene change to the Subwater Boat coming up from Leekee Lake. Teddy opens the hatch and notices land and they land on a grassy shoreline. Teddy brings out a white cloth and puts it down because it's picnic time. Hermit brings out the picnic basket (must...resist...obvious...Yogi Bear...joke...) and they eat Chewy Vegetable Sandwiches as Teddy discovers. Hermit's smiling from ear to ear; but here comes the Airship and Teddy spots it right away. Teddy and Grubby wave at each other and how Grubby didn't notice the Hermit is a mystery to me, even though Grubby should have at least noticed someone with Teddy before Hermit bails via being written out by teleport. And thus ends the story of the Hermit and we will NEVER see him again.
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh boy! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
More on that in the Hate Plague arc. So, the Airship lands as Teddy has finally noticed that the Hermit is gone and is even pleading to them that he saw a Hermit. Grubby and Gimmick think this is just dellusions brought on by isolation. What a bunch of geeks?! These two would make horrible allies when it comes to mental illness. How did Grubby miss the brown robe of the Hermit?! I agree with Teddy on this one. Teddy shows off the Subwater Boat and the sandwiches as evidence that the Hermit is not imaginery and even Gimmick has to concede that there is something amiss here since he knows Teddy couldn't have built that boat on this own even if he was building it, which was never built by either Teddy nor the Hermit anyway. Grubby of course cares more about eating sandwiches than admitting that he might be wrong on this Hermit fellow. Grubby then points out that they have news concerning the Black Box and Teddy is shocked to hear this; but before the conversation could turn even more interesting, let's go back to the throne room of MAVO with Tweeg and Trudge as Tweeg has treasure surrounding him. Tweeg has declared himself king of MAVO, judging by the crown on his head as Tweeg has Trudge write a letter to his mother, who we have not seen nor heard of since Tweeg Joins MAVO actually. LB comes in with a sack of tools; which was confused with jewels; and this annoys and angers Tweeg because he's king of MAVO you see. Tweeg decides to let LB go on that one and he summons the dues collector. Uh-oh! I smell payback a coming, because if anyone saw Tweeg Has The Tweezles, Miss Maggotheart's scene with Tweeg was where Maggotheart was literally rewarding herself for harrassing a MAVO Member. Scene change and in comes Drudge with Miss Maggotheart and darn it, can you not smelly the irony coming out of this?! I see Tweeg treasures a lot of fruits as well as the usual treasure in this scene. So, Miss Maggotheart's "punishment" is, and keep in mind, Maggotheart is selling this like she is willing to work with Tweeg in spite being the one who harassed him to no end, to as LB puts it: Peel...The...Grapes! Miss Maggotheart is confused and flustered; but sells it anyway. Tweeg loves LB's firm command, which causes LB to get his name wrong for the 666th time; and Tweeg is so offended by this, he decides to invoke the TEDDY RUXPIN SONG OF DOOM about his own name! AWESOME! I cannot do this justice. This is the greatest ending to a Canadian cartoon of all time as Sludge joins in and they do the worst dance ever, as Tweeg pops up from the treasure like Scrooge McDuck. LB claims that he'll try and gets it wrong anyway. Spotlights, eating peeled grapes ensue. And then we come to that ending I mentioned a few lines ago as Tweeg throws LB into the air and we end the episode at 19:12 with the final dialogue...
Tweeg: I'm Tweeg! Tweeg!
T-W-Double E-W Double E-W Double E-G! (Tweeg doesn't
catch LB on the way ground as LB lands on his chin.)
LB:
But that spells Tweeweeweeg~! Touts.
Tweeg:
THAT'S TWEEG~!
Now, THAT'S how you end the most absurd episode in the show up to this point. Sadly; for Tweeg, this will not last long. Outside of some really silly animation mistakes, a logic break and Quellor being buried, this was the best episode of the entire arc. all thanks to Tweeg making his dreams come true like a proto-Trumpier who fails at life. **** 1/2 (90%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Well; you cannot say that this was a boring episode, that is for sure. The Hermit/Teddy stuff is coming along nicely and the Subwater Boat song was really good; but it simply cannot top Tweeg's over the top "It's Tweeg, you morons!" song at the end which I cannot help but mark out for that. The Black Box thing for the most part is okay; although I felt that it could be booked better. Not just the seventh crystal inside of it; but also the rules for being Surpreme Oppressor because this so far has been rock bottom for Quellor as a creditable heel and Quellor has no heat left at this point. The only way Quellor gets his heat back is if he steals the The Box back and zaps Tweeg with it. That's the only way out now. The Tweeg/LB segments were awesome as usual and really picked up the moment Tweeg walked right into MAVO Headquarters with the Black Box in front of him. I also loved the irony of Miss Maggotheart working for Tweeg as well. Overall; this was the best episode of the arc and this arc is miles away better than the Death of Innocence arc. Mainly because DOI tried to play pathos and failed, where as this was adventure/comedy, which is this show's biggest strength. So, next up; is Quellor's miracle comeback and everything comes full circle as everyone involved heads to the Hard To Find City because apparently, Tweeg has declared war on the Gutangs for defining him. This is going to be a trainwreck, in a good way; at least in storyline. So...
Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you all next time.