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In The Money
Reviewed: 03/29/2008
Geez; That Isn't Being Obvious In The Very Least, No Siree.
Welcome back kiddies; it's time for another series to be ranted on by yours truly. Now we are really going to set the Wayback Machine back to old school Disney. Back before DTVA was ever over as a television division. Back when Hanna Barbera and Ruby Spears were the only real animation studios out there throwing out as much crap as humanly possible. Back when heavy moralizing was king and quality was never even given a thought at all. Back when Mister T had an animation series and a wrestling contract. Yeah; we are going back to 1985 with the first DTVA series in the history of the division. Enter: The Wuzzles. If you were a Disney fanboy and were six years old in 1984 then you know who the Wuzzles were. Those two animal fusion characters who lived in a slice of life setting called the Land of Wuz while Stan Freberg narrated the whole thing; even stuff that didn't even happen nor had anything to do with the plot whatsoever! Why this show didn't do so well still escapes me to this day. Maybe it was the fact that it's only function was to sell the Wuzzles brand to little kids which in this show was even more inexcusable since unlike most toy shows during this era; The Wuzzles didn't suck.
While most of us don't remember this show; it actually did some blazing a trail in it's own right despite not getting the praise that Gummi Bears and Ducktales got. One example is the Slice of Life exotic world setting which TaleSpin later stole and went beyond the pale. It gave us the first DTVA show to be fully narrated (in all 13 episodes no less) which Dave The Barbarian stole and drove to the ground. It also set up the Gummi Bears as the first show to get DTVA over. It was the official DTVA debut for Brian Cummings, Ken Koonce, David Weimers, Carole Beers, Alan Oppenheimer, Tress MacNeille, Ken Tsumura and many others both from TaleSpin and from other DTVA series. It was also one of the few series in DTVA if ever to be on broadcast television on CBS (Gummi Bears on NBC) which was not really one of Disney's better ideas since Gummi Bears MURDERED Wuzzles in the ratings and the show was canceled after 13 episodes sadly enough.
Although it had better success in the UK (kind of like when TaleSpin hit cult status in Russia years after it was canned due to the USSR themes) even getting an animated short cinema release with the episode Bulls Of A Feather. So; what is my humble opinion of this show? Well; I haven't seen the show in almost a decade so I remember little of it other than the fact that I gave it the lowest rating of the old school DTVA shows (Fluppy Dogs notwithstanding since I haven't seen enough of the pilot to give it a rating) between 1985 and 1990; although it was second last between 1990-1993 since I gave TaleSpin the worst rating during those three years. You now know what TaleSpin gets today. Funny thing is that The Wuzzles was the template for The Popples which came out in 1986 while The Wuzzles took the Slice of Life concept from The Get Along Gang back in 1984. Life is so weird I guess. Anyhow; The Wuzzles only lasted 13 full half-hour episodes so it shouldn't take too long to rant on them all. Sadly; I do not have the pilot Bulls of A Feather with me and a good third of episode two doesn't want to work for me either so I'll have to make do with the footage that I do have so I'll start with episode three (Note From The Future: Both episodes in question were completed so there you go.). As with all rants; all the jokes apply except for the Now you know you are watching a classic line since Sunwoo is nowhere to be found since Disney was still working with TMS at this point.
Sadly; I do not have any exact information on the writers and story editors for each episode of the Wuzzles and my sources do not have the ending sequences to verify the writers. So; I'll have to rely on what I am given from Internet sources. One of the writers is Mark Evanier according to USIMDB who's biggest claim to fame was writing 67 episodes for Garfield & Friends and a couple of episodes of Dungeons & Dragons The Animated Series which was released just two years ago. He was recently spotted in the documentary True Believer: The Father of Superheroes. I know Ken Koonce and David Weimers have done episodes and I they story edited much of the series. Ken you know and is still around. Sadly; he's getting all the bad shows lately with Brandy & Mr. Whiskers as the latest. David Weimers retired in 2003 to England after doing the latest Inspector Gadget remake series. The Big Cartoon Database even states that Ken Koonce and David Weimers wrote this episode and about half the series. However; I am not ready to confirm that until I have visual evidence on all episodes. Another writer is Bobby Logan who was the story editor for The Popples and wrote such shows as The Loveboat, 1997 Annual Microsoft Convention, Wimzie's House and The World Most Daring Rescues to name a few. I also believed that Tony Benedict was a story editor who has been around the animation industry since 1956 working for Disney and Hanna Barbera as a storyboard artist and writer for the Flinstones and Yogi Bears to name just a few. He recently worked at Sierra and Disney Interactive as a digital artist as well.
This episode was written by Ken Koonce and David Weimers. The story is done by Bob Rosenfarb. Bob Rosenfarb (no relation to Bob Logan I do believe) wrote episodes for Step By Step, Golden Girls, Head of the Class, Shadow Chasers and The Get Along Gang. The Wuzzles is his only DTVA appearance. He has four production credits, 18 writing credits and an acting credit as Bernie from Boogyman II. Mein Leben & ich ( A German sitcom) is his most recent credit. No story editor here either.
Opening Moment #1: The opening sequence is nothing special actually and it is pretty much all original footage with limited animation . Nothing compared to the series itself which is much better animated. It basically sets up the shows' premise with the buildings popping up in The Land of Wuz. Plus; it sets up what the characters are about as a paint brush creates two animals and mixes them into one character. Eleroo is the first one to get the treatment which is fine because I kind of like him actually. Eleroo blitzs Bumblelion (isn't that pretty violent? In the opening sequence no less?) and then it's the entire babyface group dancing towards the screen. Yeah; it's all dancing and singing animals but it's 1985 so it's apporos. And since this was designed for children 3-6 years old; it was expected. Did I mention that Moosel is my favorite babyface character? Mostly bouncing around and going through hoops. Hippo (because it's easier to spell) squashes one of the babyfaces and then gets thrown away. Then the only heel Croc shows up to push them away but Hippo squashes him flatter than Alexander the Grape. Nyuk! Nyuk! We know this because heels are usually one animal characters. The sequence ends with the babyfaces jumping into the mountain which appears above from the Wuzzles Logo. Disney would do a lot better with opening sequences later on by using both show and original footage.
Opening Moment #2: The Wuzzle's title card shows up which shows a couple of Wuzzles playing below the title of the episode. This is so 1980's Hanna Barbera'ish that it isn't funny and liable to lawsuits. Disney thankfully stopped doing this pretty much until Hercules: The Animated Series came in 1997 which by that time; Hanna Barbera was with Time Warner. Disney did use unique title cards from time to time (TaleSpin did it twice; DARKWING...DUCK once) and they were a million times better than this actually.
We officially begin the series in the LOVABLE LAND OF WUZ as the awesome NARRATION OF DOOM begins. You should know Stan Freberg by now since he was in those animated shorts Beany & Cecil from the 1940's and 1950. He was Cecil in case you didn't know. He was the Big Bad Wolf, Three Little Bops and the Singing Narrator in The Loony, Loony Bugs Bunny Movie (although for the life of me I don't know where that short came from knowing how Warner was using clips in 1981). He was the race announcer in the movie Stuart Little and Baby Bear in Looney Tunes: Back In Action. He was Jimmy in Ren & Stimpy and even wrote songs in the 1950's, wrote a few episodes and movies and was on the Steve Allen show. He biggest gimmick is being a narrator. What is interesting here is that this was pretty much the only time in the 1980's and 1990's that DTVA ever used a narrator to narrate an entire series. If you don't count the dreaded VOICEOVER OF DOOM from Drake Mallard of course. The narrator didn't come back until DAVE THE BARBARIAN OF LAUGHS in 2004 when Jeff Glen Bennett did narration and he is clearly no Stan Freberg. Stan also manages to put a lot of spunk in saying the word Wuz as if he is cringing speaking the name for some reason. Is Wuz a sex organ slang word that I'm somehow NOT getting here?
As for the land of Wuz; it looks pretty normal in comparison to the characters in this show. Minus the ice cream tower which actually looks remotely odd. And then he hear and feel the MAN SIZED BUMP as Stan ends his narration as we cut to the street and see our first two Wuzzles characters BumbleLion and Eleroo on a skateboard WUZZING down the street. Wow; nineteen seconds in and I have made my first stupid pun for this show. More to come; I assure thee. Anyhow; the Wuzzles are a bunch of creatures who are made from two animals and then painted in preschool friendly colors (a telltale sign of who Disney was marketing the toys to in case it wasn't already apparent). Bumblelion is a cross between a lion and bee and voiced by Brain Cummings who all Gummi Bear fans who have read my rants should know by now. He was Jack Cases in TaleSpin by the way. He is the lead character who likes sports and lives in a beehive. Interesting note: Bumblelion's personality is that he is fearless, is orange in color and loves sports. So Disney basically combined Champ Bear and Braveheart Lion from Care Bears (before Care Bears was cool).
Riding behind him and not liking the trip because Bumbelion is taking this getting from point A to point B to the extreme so to speak is Eleroo. Eleroo is a kangaroo and an elephant combined and is the shrill voice of reason in that he speaks in the wise voice. I should note that he is male; but a pouch is strictly a female thing in kangaroo's. On the other hand; you could argue that the kangaroo was a female when the fusion took place; but that might be seen as sexist so we're forced to see this as a logic break for PC reasons. Eleroo is basically Lots-A-Heart elephant and Bright Heart Raccoon from Care Bears in his wisdom, majority elephant and purple color. Eleroo is voiced by Henry Gibson who was a regular cast member of Rowan and Martin's Laugh-in. Sadly; I have never seen said show. He started in Jerry Lewis' film: The Nutty Professor and was a voice on The Smurfs and Rocket Power. Trapped Ashes was his most recent film I do believe. I happen to like Eleroo who is pretty much having to tell Bumblelion to look out as we see in the distance a yellow bear with the GIFT BOXES OF DOOM in the middle of the street. This is like a drunk driver commercial except neither Bumblelion nor Eleroo are drunk.
Butterbear is half butterfly; half bear and is completely naked which is kind of surprising since most female cartoon animals in cartoons are clothed. No wonder this show tanked. She's a gardener and is voiced by Kathleen Helppie-Shipley who I got word from Chris Barat in one of those “You Have To Be There Backstage” moments since Kathleen was actually the head of the editorial department for Warner Brothers who produced Bug Bunny comic strips in the 1980's. In fact according to USIMDB; she was a producer of most of Warner Brothers television episodes and specials between 1978 and 2000! She was part of studio production for Everyone's Hero recently which proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that anyone who claims “What the hell?! Flying bearing in airplanes?!” has NEVER seen Everyone's Hero in any shape or form. Seriously; A TALKING BASEBALL? SHOOT ME NOW! I have never seen the full movie of course; but still you cannot help but laugh at a talking baseball. It makes dancing animals look quite plausible actually. Butterbear is basically Funshine Bear as Bumbelion steals her Appleberry Cake (so sezs Butterbear who's acting is pretty wooden which explains why Kathleen didn't last beyond three series in voice actings) while Butterbear does a pretty impressive whirlwind spot. You probably won't hear me use that word spot often since this show is designed for preschoolers and therefore bumps and spots will be reduced to almost nothing. And I think Buttebear has been exchanging recipes with Strawberry Shortcake and her gang backstage which explains the commercialism in this cartoon very well thank you very much.
Bumblelion is giddy for the cake which means that he stole it making Swiper the Fox look like a total pussy. Butterbear jumps up and floats up to blow Bumblelion off and Kathleen's acting is so wooden that I'm SHOCKED that Katie Leigh didn't replace her in three minutes. Seriously; Kathleen's voice is so bad. Bumblelion tells her not to worry because they'll take the cake to Hoppo as he lifts the cake and Eleroo eats runaway icing. Now this is getting a wee bit silly. Speaking of the Hoppo; she's relaxing like the lazy well hung half hippo half rabbit that she is in her lawn chair next on her deck in front of her rich house under the umbrella table under the sun so to speak. She's wearing a tight bathing suit and I'm shocked because that officially makes Butterbear naked as a jaybird. Again; no wonder this show tanked. Hoppo is an out-of-shape blue singer and actor who is fat. Although she looks about half of Baloo's weight so she was actually quite trim compared to some. Oh; and she's the diva of the outfit. Well; there's Sunni's bad influence right there folks. Hoppo is voiced by Jo Anne Worley who was also a regular cast member of Rowan & Martin's Laugh In and was a voice in Kim Possible. Yeah; she's Treat Heart Pig with a touch of Proud Heart Cat. She puts her steel mug down because alcohol is still a no-no on DTVA onto the table as we cut back to the S-corner dirt road and see the SKATEBOARD FREAKS OF DOOM ride around and do the ski jump spot over the moat that surrounds Hoppo's house (I think). Call me crazy; but I don't think using a fence would create such a spot in the first place. There's logic break #1 for the episode. Even more glaring when you see that there is a dock in the background.
Eleroo and Bumble fly into the air and where they land I don't really care as the Appleberry Cake somehow floats up from Bumble's hand. That is one light cake if you know what I mean. Now usually this means that the cake is going to splat into the face of Hoppo; but it somehow drops on her belly as she drops onto the ground with a wussy bump. I know that Bumble gave ample warning; but this is awfully lame. I know that there is no violence in this show; but can't someone take a cake in the face? It was unintentional anyway. Bumble and Eleroo manage to land the skateboard onto the path which makes no sense at all since the skateboard is headed for the dock in the background. Logic Break #2 for the episode and another glaring one. This is like watching a Mister T episode; only better animated and a lot more creative. Second ski jump spot off the dock which is an impressive visual and rides the waves as Bumble yells: Wuzabunga! Oh God; that was lame. No wonder Michelangelo was such a mess as a character. More bouncing on the beach as they hit the road once again. Geez; now this is like a Family Guy episode. When Ernie the Giant Chicken is involved. Eleroo grabs Bumble and panics because they are going to hit a tree (which is helpfully shown in front of them). Eleroo puts his hands over his eyes and we get the panic spot which ends with Eleroo opening his eyes realizing that he is safe. He looks from behind and sees that they split the tree. In this case; the ski's split (well Bumble did call them skateboard skis so it's apporos) and Eleroo is screwed because he's an WUZZLE OUT OF CONTROL!
Bumble is having better luck as we go into town with some figure eight spots. Sadly; Bumble was thoughtless to make some brakes and we get the slowest crash through the door into Wuz Burgers and finally the MAN-SIZED bump occurs right inside as the Wuz sign is now a Muz sign. HAHA! Nice attention to detail there as the whole burger joint is trashed. Eleroo does his own version of the Ron Tussien spot (before Run Tussien was famous) and Bumblelion is wearing a bowl on his head as one of the skis is stuck on his foot which he helpfully shows. The owner is a female pink fusion that I don't get wearing a green version of Grammi's clothes and running up the tab as it comes to way too much for Bumbelion to pay as Bumblelion is screwed for obvious reason. Next time: bump against the side of the burger joint. Maybe you'll only do fifty dollars instead of fifty thousand dollars worth of damages. He dumps a mass amount of gold coins and the debt is payed in full as the female dragon Grammi leaves. Don't ask me who voiced her; I don't know and I don't care. Eleroo tells him that he forgot about the lunch; however Bumblelion ALWAYS keeps his promises see so he bails to see Rhinokey because he's funny and has the MONEY, MONEY, YEAH, YEAH. Eleroo sits down as the place is cleaned up completely without any hint of anything being done. Logic Break #3 for the episode and we are barely two and a half minutes in. Flimago (I think since she is half flamingo) arrives as Eleroo sits down on the table and they exchange notes with Eleroo being unable to decide and then orders about 20 different things more or less. Must be Hoppo's birthday.
We head to a street corner where a pink half monkey, half rhino in a chauffeur outfit is polishing his red car all well and good. He is the ever annoying and somewhat funny Rhinokey who is voiced by Alan Oppenheimer. You already know him as Mighty Mouse and Ed Pomeroy from TaleSpin. Think Playful Heart Monkey as he loves to play jokes and be annoying. He also has a lot of money although that role would be played later by Tycoon. He cracks his first joke at the car and it's just not funny as his laughing of the joke was funnier than the actual joke itself. His pounding his fist on the car even more so. Bumble appears from behind and they shake hands; but Bumble gets the WOODEN ARM OF DOOM. Which symbolizes Kathleen's acting in a quick nutshell. HA! I KILL ME! Bumble takes about five seconds selling before he realizes that he is duped and throws the arm away. Bumble claims that Rhinokey is the funniest guy around. I think Don Karnage might have something to say about that. Rhinokey cracks another joke which isn't all that funny either. Bumble asks for some money and Rhinokey agrees to give it to him as he calls his hands dirty and tells him to check the vest. I wouldn't do that if I were you Bumble. Bumble thanks him as he checks the left pocket and out pops the noisemaker of doom to scare him. HAHA! Great selling from Bumblelion on that joke as Rhinokey laughs him off.
Rhinokey goes into his right pocket and Bumble panics like a maniac; but since Rhinokey only has like two pockets total; it contains the money. Bumble takes the money and makes some noise with it as he thanks Rhinokey for at least not screwing him. We return to the Wuzzle Burger Joint of Doom as we see Eleroo and Bumblelion sit at the table eating as Eleroo is still looking at the desert menu much to the disdain of Bumblelion. This promise is going to blow up in his face; I just know it. Thankfully; Flimago tells them that they are out of food. Well; considering that they trashed half of it earlier; it makes sense. Bumblelion asks for the bill before Eleroo eats it Bumblelion looks at it and is SHOCKED because it means he has to give up all of the money to Flimago and he does. Well; at least he could pay the bill unlike Scrooge did at Down & Out In Duckberg. Flimago walks away with the money as Eleroo is sorry for making Bumblelion broke again because he cannot buy new roller skis. Bumblelion pounds on the table and blows himself off for being broke and wants to be rich. Don't we all now Bumble? Eleroo grabs a wishbone from the turkey and suggests wishing for it. This is like shooting fish in a barrel; both ways. It's like wishing for death. Bumblelion blows it off; but Eleroo insists because it cannot hurt to do us. They do the wishbone spot and Bumblelion gets the best half of the wishbone of course.
So that logically leads to Rhinokey washing his car again which is the exact same spot they did earlier. Yeah; Telecom was recycling scenes; although the armored bank car does taint the recycling quite a bit. The radio (which TMS doesn't show to my surprise) proclaims that there is a delivery to be made and Rhinokey decides to stop talking to his car like a human being. This makes Baloo look human for some reason. Rhinokey hops into the red car and speaking of the armored; we pan over to see a half giffare half moth (Gifmouth I guess) in really weird blue clothes putting sacks of money into his armored car from the bank and closes the door. I'm amazed that they couldn't find roles for Piggypine, Koalakeet, Pandeaver, Woolrus and Skowl in this show; but Gifmouth manages to get a cameo appearance. Life is so unfair. Then the sacks of money manage to land in Rhinokey's car for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Someone's aim needs to be checked here. Rhinokey cracks another unfunny joke and speeds off in his car. We head outside of the Wuz Burger Joint as Eleroo and Bumblelion have finally walked out. Bumblelion is sulking; Eleroo isn't. Eleroo tells him to cheer up because he won the wishbone contest in which Bumblelion blows him off (in between seeing a car wheel coming down the road). We then see Rhinokey racing down the parking lot of the Wuz Burger Joint and he hits the parking speed bumps. Someone needs to check the teachers who teach Wuzzles how to drive as I can pick about 12 violations of the law just on that spot alone. Seriously.
The money sacks bump pretty well and out of Rhinokey's car as it flies into the air. Bumblelion proclaims that sacks of money would NEVER fall right out of the sky and of course Bumblelion takes two really NASTY MAN-SIZED bumps right on the head with the two sacks of money that came from the sky. Sunwoo should be ashamed of itself for calling itself an animation company (Note From The Future: No, not really since they improved since 1990). Bumblelion's selling is so funny that it's cute. Eleroo asks if he is all right (The answer to that would be a yes because cartoon characters NEVER actually get injured.) and Bumblelion asks what hit him. Eleroo proclaims it is just money bags falling from the sky and then they get the LIGHTBULB OF BLOODY CLARITY and see the money bags falling from the sky on the ground. Bumblelion opens one of them and then does his over the top selling of excitement (You should know which one from the opening sequence.) because there is lots of MONEY BABEE! Now he believes in that wishbone nonsense as he is swimming in gold coins. All he needs now is the symptoms of Gold Fever; and we are all set in the over the top DTVA illnesses. Bumblelion then becomes sneaky and grabs the sacks of money for himself as Stan Freberg blows Bumblelion off for being so greedy. Okay; it was semi-nice; but come on folks! Bumblelion gives Eleroo a gold coin anyway to show that he's remotely nice as the segment ends about six and a half minutes in (7 ½ if you include the opening) which is a lot shorter than most segments. Then again; this is the first show DTVA made so it is understandable.
After the commercial break; we head to Rhinokey's house which is a ice-cream like hut as Bumblelion's car parks next to the driveway. Eleroo is in the passenger side seat asking Bumble why he is here and Bumblelion explains that he's here to pay back Rhinokey for the loan because he's rich see. Wow; Bumblelion makes Drake Mallard look absolutely like the sick, greedy full of himself Mallard that he is. Thank you Bumblelion. And of course he oversells the rich part. They head to the door as Bumblelion and Eleroo park themselves in front of the door. Bumble puts the sacks of money down on the floor and rings the doorbell which makes a squish sound effect. Rule of thumb: If that sound effect occurs; it means that the door bell is rigged with a joke and it shows up as Bumblelion eats spray of water. Bumble blows off Rhinokey's sense of humor and knocks on the door and nearly gets his eardrums killed with the noisemaker which exits from the door. HAHA! I'm surprised Baloo hasn't tried this on Rebecca yet; just to get her back for killing his eardrums due to the WRAITH OF BECKEY.
Eleroo does his wisdom talking as money never comes easy as Bumblelion pounds on the door and then drops down to hide from the Wrath of Bad Jokes as Eleroo proclaims that Rhinokey is not home. Bumblelion decides to open the sacks of money and he puts in a couple of big handfuls of gold coins into his mailbox and then storms off as Eleroo looks worried. As they go back to the car; the armored car speeds down the road almost MURDERING them in the process as Bumblelion and Eleroo are concerned now because somehow this has something to do with Rhinokey. So that logically leads to the Wuzzle Police Station which looks so wacky that the Keystone Cops have NOTHING on them. We head inside as we are in a dark room and Rhinokey is sitting in a chair with lamps shining on his body. Line of the episode comes from Narrator Stan and I'm paraphrasing here:
Stan: Rhinokey apparently committed assault with a deadly punchline!
BWHAHAHAHAHAHA! That is so funny that even I was spitting out my Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi. Oh man; if this wasn't a pre-school show to sell toys; I'm sure that we would really be seeing Grade S material from everyone involved. But of course; this is a B show on CBS; so it is not. Even funnier: This is a preschool show and somehow they managed to invoke assault and a death reference all in the same sentence. Oh that cooky Stan Freberg. Rhinokey then almost meets it because proclaiming that he couldn't help the police because he couldn't solve a jigsaw puzzle even with two pieces in it. That's Rhinokey's second funny joke in this series I should note. The police aren't amused as they are half chicken hawks and half horses I guess judging by the white hair. At least they are wearing proper police uniforms instead of the gay gym gear Gifmouth was wearing earlier. Rhinokey blows it off because they want him to cut the jokes and that's his best routine see. That's not funny. So we head into town as Bumblelion and Eleroo walk with the money sacks with Bumble looking like a cocky tough guy. We then see Hoppo appearing asking with is in the bag. Should I tell her it's a snake and see how well she runs away?
Bumblelion calls her out for knowing everything and they have a meeting of the minds. And it wasn't at the gym or the fat farm either. He shows her the gold coins and Hoppo hops for joy. Well; at least someone is in their character very well here. However; Hoppo then blows him off because it is play money. Because Bumbelion is broke see and Bumblelion claims that it is real money. He going to do all the things he wanted to do which allows Hoppo to ask for a date more or less while fluttering her wings which makes no sense since Butterbear has the wings and she is supposed to be half rabbit, half hippo. That is just sad folks. Bumblelion wants to buy a yacht jet which gives Hoppo the BALLOON OF CHILD CORRUPTING DOOM which anime dubbers would paint out because having an imagination is dangerous see. We see pictures of Hoppo making love with Bumblelion on the yacht jet and then more pictures of the same as a big house on Wuzzary Hills. And you thought having duck references in Ducktales and DARKWING..DUCK was contrived. More evidence that this was a toy show. Then it's onto the Wuzzle Beach with more Bumblelion and Hoppo together. This is like the ultimate Hoppo/Bumblelion time wasting whore show here. No wonder people thought Family Guy was so high brow: They all watched this show beforehand. Bumblelion then makes the mistakes of using I instead of we in meeting high class friends as the MIRROR OF LOVE breaks and Hoppo's mad.
She thinks Bumblelion sees her as small change which Bumblelion blows off with a thinly veiled fat joke as he continues to make love with the SACK OF STINKY MONEY. Hoppo blows him off with the stinking rich metaphor and then storms off. Well; it doesn't really matter since Bumblelion actually has a crush with Butterbear and I think that scene would have been better suited with Butterbear involved to build up some heat between the two; but of course Kathleen's wooden acting would have likely screwed it up; so it was for the best. Eleroo calls him out for hurting Hoppo's feelings; so Bumblelion throws some gold coins at Eleroo and blows him and Hoppo off because storming off like a greedy bastard. Eleroo proclaims that the money has sure changed Bumblelion. No crap Sherlock! So we head back to the Keystone Cops Police Station and inside as Rhinokey is eating a banana after having about thirty of them on the ground and the chair. Funny how the Quack Pack writers stole this spot for the heels later on which never fit. Keystone Cop#1 demands answers once again as they found gold coins in his mailbox. Rhinokey answers with another bad joke which even the police officer has had enough of. Just throw the guy in jail and charge him with assault with a deadly punchline. According to Stan; it's THE LAW OF WUZ! So now the police officer uses eye contact violence while grabbing onto his vest as Rhinokey finally stops the joke and proclaims that he is not guilty.
See; he hasn't stolen anything except for a few bad jokes (apparently judging by his selling) and the Keystone Cop #1 throws him back into the chair. Rhinokey decides for another joke and this is getting really stupid now. It is a question joke: What kind of key goes in through a door and out through a window? Sadly; the police officer gives up and sets his feet which slips on the banana peels as Rhinokey answers that it is a Rhinokey. Yeah; that was another bad joke from him; what a surprise?! Rhinokey runs away and manages to make it through the window and escapes from the keystone cop #1's clutches. Now do you know the dangers of feeding your prisoners? As barbaric as waterboarding is as a torture; at least they don't crack jokes and escape. Rhinokey hops into his car as an old 1930's stereotype lady (check the EYEGLASSES STICK OF DOOM she is carrying with her) who happens to be a swan and only a swan which completely destroys the CONTINUITY of the whole series right there. At least Crock the main villain is supposed to be half dinosaur, half crocodile; but was screwed up by the animators. She's asking if he is free and Rhinokey states that he is not free; but inexpensive as he speeds off in his car and sprays mud on her face. Umm; check your internal logic here guys: the road is packed dirt. You cannot spray mud and/or dirt into her on a sunny day at close range. Logic break #4 for the episode and this is getting silly now. She blows Rhinokey off for that spot and I don't blame her one bit.
So we head inside the HOUSE OF SKIS as Eleroo and Rhinokey are inside as a storekeeper is showing him a new pair of roller skis. He's apparently half bat and half rat which offends me for some reason. Oh yeah; they violated ANIME CONDUCT RULE #12 (Thou Shalt Not Rhyme; Because it's COOL!); that's the reason. RatBat (I believe) explains the features and Eleroo praises the features. Bumblelion isn't convinced because they are not duper I guess. BatRat asks why and Bumbelion proclaims that he is rich see and only buys the best. BatRat offers to wrap the best which are pink skis which even I would be ashamed of and Bumblelion blows him off and causally walks away like a dumb, greedy little jerk. He will wait until he get the best of the best which are not available in his store I guess. Eleroo can only shrug as we logically head to the lighthouse harbour and inside the living room as we are finally introduced to my favorite character in the series Moosel who is half mouse and half seal voiced by the late Bill Scott. He's is the vivid imagination guy of the series and doesn't like Rhinokey's jokes. That makes two of us. Other than Tycoon and the heels; that's it for the babyfaces.
He also walks funny as he carries a tray with a glass of juice (which is probably fused knowing these clowns) for Rhinokey to relax; but he doesn't notice that Rhinokey is here. Maybe because he's on the run from the Keystone Cops Moosel? His imagination is running wild BRUTHA!! Oh; Rhinokey's hiding inside the big ass lampshade on top as he cracks another unfunny joke just to annoy me. Moosel gleefully blows him off for that because he's in serious trouble see. Rhinokey swings down and states that he would have a captive audience when he goes to jail. That one really grinds my gears for some reason I cannot put my thumb on. Thankfully Moosel blows him off with the stereotypical work to death metaphor which causes Rhinokey to reconsider his sense of humor. If only it would last as he panics and runs and hides in the lamp shade. Now if Moosel can do stuff like that; he can get Rhinokey over as comedy relief. Rhinokey then introduces the concept of disguising himself to DTVA to foil the Keystone Cops and Moosel thinks that it's a great idea. This would also be the 7th MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN of DTVA (at the most since I cannot rant on the first two episodes and Gummi Bears was going on at this point.) Somehow; the clothes get into the lamp shade which is logic break #5 for the episode and Rhinokey disguises himself as a cowboy. Kit would later steal that disguise for A Star Is Torn.
Rhinokey also introduces the concept of a disguise of fooling no one but the characters that they INTEND to fool. That logically leads to the garage somewhere in the middle of nowhere as it opens and out comes the BANANA SPLIT FLOAT OF DEATH as Moosel comes out as well. He tells Rhinokey that it is safe and Rhinokey (In Cowboy gear) comes out and Moosel reminds him of the cowboy accent. Well; they are trying, I'll give them that much. Rhinokey tries it out and he's having problems breaking it in. Well; it doesn't matter because the float fits right into the Wuz Parade. Well; at least the writers are writing a solid episode even if there are some glaring logic breaks in the process from TMS. Moosel and Rhinokey hop into the float and speed off. Memo to Rhinokey: If you want this to work; lose the freaking laugh. It's a dead giveaway. The BANANA SPLIT FLOAT OF DEATH (oh geez; this stuff writes itself) speed down the road and so that logically leads to Wuz Motors (General Motors anyone? Yeah..) as the limo shatters the glass of the front windows and out hops Stone Cold, Stone Cold, Stone Cold...Errrr...Bumblelion (now there's a joke Rhinokey should steal) with the sacks of money as he walks towards the shattered window and throws gold coins at it. He then walks away. Now that's a true sign of an asshole right there and this is a preschool show. No wonder this show tanked. No wonder Dora was so screwed up. No wonder Peggy Charmon was so pissed off.
He hops in his limo and it speeds off which logically leads to Bumblelion flying in the air on his...Limo Flyer? WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?! This makes zero sense and there's zero buildup to it. This takes CONTINUITY ERRORS to new extremes. Logic break #6 for the episode. Bumblelion lives the life on a chair drinking juice as Stan narrates the whole thing proclaiming that Rhinokey will be wearing stripes if Bumblelion continues to spend all of his money. We pan over to the restaurant AFTER HAPPY HOUR (After Dark) and head inside to a white table as Bumble is wearing a tux at a white cloth covered table. He snaps his fingers and three waiters (all hounds again killing the CONTINUITY of this series since they are one animal species each) arrive ready to take his order. Funny spin scene changer ensues which shows how cheap 1985 was at that point as we head to a field where Hoppo, Butterbear and Eleroo are putting the final touches on their parade float which has a Hawaiian looking tugboat with a big Wuz Day balloon on the back. Could be worse I guess. It could be a Banana Split Float carrying a so-called thief (who really isn't) and a funny creative partner in crime (who really isn't either). Hoppo repeats what Bumblelion said in a really pissed off voice and quite frankly I could not care since asshole Bumblelion looks pretty cool.
Butterbear doesn't believe that it's Bumblelion and believe it or not this is the first decent acting job from Kathleen. Butterbear tells them to be quiet because here comes Bumblelion who is wearing a tux with top hat. Who does he think he is Scrooge McDuck?! He asks for the time which doesn't amuse Hoppo one bit as she demands that he listen to his watch. So Bumblelion pulls out his new big ass pocket watch which is as big as Andre's hand and it talks telling Bumblelion to go shopping. With technology today; that would be a cheap thing to buy now. However; it's 1985; so it's not. The watch does look funny though and Bumblelion agrees with it and walks off like a cocky jerk. Butterbear is SHOCKED while Hoppo is APPALLED and Hoppo does the blowing off of course. Butterbear doesn't like the new Bumblelion and Eleroo suggests having Bumblelion buy back his old personality. That gives Hoppo and Butterbear a plan and it involves Eleroo being forced over to the hammock as Bumblelion is sleeping in front of the table with a fused shake I do believe. Bumblelion wakes up and wonders what is up as Butterbear and Hoppo show disdain for him. Eleroo proclaims that he has something to tell him and Bumblelion claims to know what they are here for.
Eleroo and the gang thinks this is a good thing. If you cannot smell the asshole attitude coming from Bumblelion within the next thirty seconds; then you have no business reading this rant. I am so damn good at predicting stuff after watching about 200 episodes or so of DTVA as the babyfaces are SHOCKED and APPALLED (in that order). Told ya it was going to happen kiddies. Hoppo blows him off of course as Butterbear tries to restrain her and manages to push her away from Bumble Scrooge. Hey; a funny pun from Kathleen. Maybe I have underestimated her (Note From The Future: No you did not Mr. Weagle.). Bumblelion doesn't like that ego bruise and Eleroo is trying to play the “Mr. Iwata soft teacher of foresight” to convince Bumblelion that they want him as he was. Bumblelion blows it off because he was always like this; except now he can eliminate the facade because he is richer see. Evidence #1: He pants when he opens the money sacks. Eleroo continues the soft heart talk while turning his back on him in a pretty neat spot. See; the money has changed him because he has it all according to Bumblelion which is enough for Eleroo to leave him and he said it in a pretty harsh tone despite his words being soft. That's why I like Eleroo. Bumblelion is still confused as he continues to comb his hair like a jackass. Bumblelion hugs the sacks of money like they are human and kisses it as Narrator Stan agrees with Eleroo on this one as the segment ends 15 minutes in.
After the commercial break; we head to Bumblelion's beehive as Narrator Stan continues to narrate the thing and he proclaims that he is out of money and out of friends. Well; that's not quite right since Rhinokey and Moosel haven't met asshole Bumblelion yet; so there is your intentional mistake right there. We head inside Bumble Scrooge's Beehive of Greed, in the living room as Bumblelion is counting his money on the floor and looking really down. Well; that's the first sign that you have screwed your friends over. Long yak session ends with the ringing of the doorbell and Bumblelion takes it as a sign that they have come back. Bumblelion does his oversell and goes to the door and sees Rhinokey and Moosel at the front door. Now you see Stan's mistake here. Get use to it; this happens in all 13 episodes. Rhinokey blows off Bumblelion because he's not supposed to know that it is Rhinokey. Bumblelion responds that the disguise is a failure as Moosel and Bumblelion exchange notes on the situation here. The SIERNS OF PAIN wail and that's enough for Moosel and Rhinokey to run in and hide underneath a green chair as the Keystone Cops Police Car races through the street. Bumblelion shuts the door beforehand to make sure no funny business occurs. Rhinokey asks him to help him and asks for his money back that he loaned and Bumblelion blows him off because he knows his tricks. Okay; you're a jerk, we get it Bumblelion.
Bumblelion explains that he paid him back by putting the money in his mailbox. Rhinokey finally gets the LIGHTBULB OF BLOODY CLARITY and realizes that it was Bumblelion who put the money in his mailbox. UH OH! Rhinokey asks where he got that money since he is broke and Bumblelion puts it all back in and blows Rhinokey off because it's all his. Rhinokey then notices the bags Bumblelion is hording are from the bank. See what bad aiming has lead to?! Bumblelion lose his friends and he's a criminal that he really doesn't know. Rhinokey wants them back so he can prove that he didn't steal them and Bumblelion slaps his hand away because he's got the GOLD FEVER OF DOOM see. And this is more believable than when Scrooge McDuck is infected with it. However; it's still better than this version of gold fever that's for sure. Bumblelion claims that he wished for them and Rhinokey should wish for his own if he wants money. Rhinokey decides to wish for one and then grabs on the sacks of money. Yeah; this is getting silly and it's time to mercy kill this episode now. Rhinokey grabs it and Bumblelion proclaims that he's being robbed (thus making Bumblelion the babyface) as the tug of war starts.
Moosel hides behind the chair in horror at all the lame antics that are soon to follow. He and I are so well strung. Bumblelion wins that tug of war and grabs the sacks of money and blows off Rhinokey before running out of his own house. I betcha he calls the police on him too. He runs to his car which is now yellow in color (bad coloring mistake there TMS) and hops into it with the money close behind him and speeds off. Rhinokey and Moosel go into their BANANA SPLIT CAR OF DOOM which apparently is using legit ingredients which hasn't melted at all. Logic Break #7 for the episode as they speed off and it leads to the car chase scene. Oh goody! A car chase scene in a DTVA cartoon. The float spins around and we cut to the old lady who dust herself off only to eat ice cream as a result. Okay; that made more logic sense than the mud spray spot from earlier. She blows them off again as usual as the whirlwind spot continue on that float and Moosel has all the fun. Moosel finally flies off the float into the air and I hope he lands in a spot spot which so happens to be right into the Roller Skis inside BatRat's House of Skis. Well; I had to get that pun in there at sometime and besides; BatRat was RIGHT THERE waiting to be targeted. Nice bumping from everyone involved as Moosel flies out of the store with almost everything behind him and he is tied up against the roller ski. Okay; this is pretty good and it at least gives Moosel a spot to do in this episode.
The brakes are off (Moosel uses his foot flipper to crank up the gas) and he's off BABEE! Back to the spinning Banana Split Float Car of Doom which is still intact. Bad form there Telecom as we see Moosel going down the hill. Bad logic break #8 there guys since Moosel went forward into the store and should have gone further down the hill instead of being BEHIND the float to start with. Again; this is why the show tanked and no one remembers it. Rhinokey follows in the float as we cut to see Keystone Cop #2 sitting in his motorcycle waiting to catch a speeder behind a large road sign. Good; at least they didn't write him out of the episode. He sees Bumblelion speeding and he's ready to catch him BABEE! He waits for Moosel and Rhinokey to speed by and then puts on his goggles; lest he eats ice cream like old lady and chases after them. Moosel continues to struggle and manages to get his foot flipper on the brake and it stops him dead in his tracks. Sadly; he does the whirlwind spot and that allows the rope to attach itself to the headlight of the speeding float and it's more fun for Moosel. Chase sequence ensues for a while until we cut to the road sign which is helpfully labeled as Road Closed because there is a parade going on. We pan over to see that Hoppo is on the tractor and tells Butterbear to finish up because the parade is going to start and Butterbear sells it. Hoppo runs the tractor and they are ready as we see the same wheel from earlier in the episode. And you thought Darkwing Duck's recycling was bad?!
They get into the middle of the street and here comes Bumblelion driving like a maniac as Hoppo oversells panic (complete with silly background change) as Butterbear tells Hoppo to look out and that voice still sucks as Hoppo bounces off the tractor and runs away as Butterbear floats up in horror to allow Bumblelion's car to pass under her (nice visual guys) and all three cars pass her and of course the officer is too big so she does another silly whirlwind spot that is getting way too overplayed in this episode. MAN-SIZED bumps ensue off-screen; and the float is destroyed of course. We head into the parade action as Bumblelion shows off his steering skills around the floats while the crowd is dead silent. I guess ADR is too expensive for Disney at this point. Why is the pink horse float blowing smoke (AND THAT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH AND MOVIE RATING!)? Did someone withhold sex from this horse or something to force it to do that? Another bad logic break: Bumblelion has flowers on his car and he sneezes as a result despite being nowhere NEAR the floats to get said flowers. Logic Break #9 for the episode as the chase continues after Bumble throws some flowers away and apparently is allergic to them. Did Sunwoo enter this episode judging by the bad scrolling background in this next sequence?
Bumblelion decides to go into the conveniently placed car wash and Rhinokey doesn't like that one bit. Yeah; that isn't contrived in the very least no siree! Now the float looks damaged and with flowers again breaking internal logic. That's #10 guys. All the chasers go through the car wash of course and kudos to Keystone Cop#2 for wearing that ultra cool scuba gear before going into the wash. We get all the car wash spots which were not funny ten years before this cartoon existed and aren't funny in this cartoon now. Of course Rhinokey just couldn't resist cracking a bad joke. Moosel does some water skiing and thus is the most over character in this episode. The second Keystone Cop is the second most over of course. All chasers get out and Bumblelion is bleeding water of course while Rhinokey is cracking another bad joke while actually doing a cleaning pun and washing himself in a funny spot. When Rhinokey is the third most over character in the episode; you are hosed. We head to the parking lot of Wuz Burgers (Hasn't Flimago suffered enough already?!) and Bumblelion crashes into the barriers and the money pops out allowing Rhinokey and Moosel to arrive just in time for the money to plop right on Flimago's doorstep and Moosel flies from the rope and lands right onto the MONEY OF STINK. Good spot there as Rhinokey realizes how he lost the bank's money.
Bumblelion then realizes what he has done and apologizes for being such a selfish jerk. Sad; because asshole Bumblelion was really cool. He should apologize for the bad logic breaks. Moosel does a great spot where he praises Bumblelion in spite of the obvious and then admits that he is selfish. Too funny as Bumblelion accepts it guilty as charged. Bumblelion speaks the moral of the episode and I can sense the fans disdain for that spot. See; heavy moralizing without entertainment was the big trend in the mid 1980's. I'll let Albert Walker from the Agonybooth.com explain the whole thing in better detail in his rant on Mister T: The Animated Series. It explains it a lot better. Here comes the Keystone Cop #2 and it is all over for the rinse cycle refugees. Okay; that was a funny pun as Bumblelion shows him the sacks of money and explains that it got lost from the bank and the officer sells the story. Yeah; Rhinokey fled the police and he's RIGHT THERE (cracking a bad joke about a WANTED poster. Yeah; like I was going to let him get away with that?) waiting to be arrested and the police officer decides to let them go and even give them an REWARD (Bumblelion oversell mode commences here). That is just peachy. Well; the bank's bad aim was the cause of this problem so really they are not criminals since they didn't know that the money was from the bank until it was too late so it works here; but man the mixed messages here are just going to confuse the kids in this one.
We go to the top shot as the babyfaces signal victory as Stan narrates how much money will be left after he pays off the spending spree and damages. Thankfully; it's enough to pay for one last meal at Wuz Burgers as the babyfaces join them together and they all kiss and make up so to speak. Well; it makes sense all things considered as Hoppo is eating like one of those Hungry Hippo's in that famous game. Hoppo forgives him and even kisses Bumble right on the cheek just to make the whole thing even more mushy than it needs to be. Hoppo shows Bumble the surprise present and Bumble tears it one to reveal the Roller Skis. Bumble is surprised since he treated his friends so badly and they respond with a double moral which makes more sense than the first one. More bad jokes from Rhinokey which annoys Hoppo as Bumble decides to put it through it's paces inside the store and rides out and takes another MAN-SIZED bump as Stan narrates that it's a peaceful ending in the wonderful land of Wuz. We go to the far shot of the town of Wuz as not all episodes can be peaceful so sezs the LAW OF STAN and that ends the episode at 21:36. This was an utter mess of logic breaks and sloppy animation from Telecom (which is a rarely); but the story was told well enough. So I'll be generous since it's the first episode I ranted on and go with ** ½ ( 50%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Well; my first Wuzzles experience is in the book and it's clear that I picked a mess of an episode here. There were ten logic breaks in there and numerous mistakes from Telecom. I know this is from Toon Disney and that have been known to cut and edit episodes because they can in the guise of protecting children; but the logic breaks were really glaring. On the other hand; the story is solid and the characters were somewhat good although Butterbear barely got anything in this one. I must say that I love Moosel and Eleroo in this one due to Moosel's ability to spot build and creative imagination and Eleroo's wisdom was pretty good albeit not much on display. Hoppo is a diva; but it was not on display here which is a good thing. I also liked asshole Bumblelion in this one as he seemed less contrived and forced than Drake was in Easy Come, Easy Grows which is the episode that was recycled from this one. Oh; and Stan Freberg was is usual good self. Rhinokey had better get better jokes; or he's going to really be exposed as a bad character here. Overall; this was a middling effort which is pretty much par for this series actually. Next up is Crock Around The Clock which will introduce the heels of this episode actually. Oh; and almost forgot: In The Money is the first episode for rant purposes in DTVA to introduce nothing but babyfaces. I think we got all the bases covered now.
Thumbs in the middle for this episode and I'll see you all next time.