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Gadget Goes Hawaiian
Surfin Gadget Hackenwrench...
Ah; here's number three in my “Episodes I look forward too in this volume” as it's Gadget's first focus episode for rant purposes. It seems to me that when a character gets monster over; they get few episodes but when a character is not so over (Monty) he gets lots of episodes. That still doesn't explain Dale though. This episode's theme: Gadget meets evil twin sister. That's all you need to know. So let's rant on shall we....
This episode is written by Julia Jane Roberts. The story is edited by Bryce Malek and supervised by Tad Stones. The animation is done by...say it with me...Walt Disney Animation Japan.
We begin this one at the ocean overlooking some rocks on the right side as the sea spray sprays on the rock just to show how awesome WD-Japan is and then the purple octopus (who looks more evil than the one in TaleSpin) climbs up the rock side as we pan up to see Dale and Zipper tied up with seaweed (is this some bad hentai Disney inserted into the DVD and I didn't notice?! Okay; it's not) in trouble as we pan up further to see the Rangers in their bathing gear (Gadget's wearing the mid-riff banana yellow one today) as they are still figuring out how to save them from the octopus. I always hear hot red pepper works wonders as long as it's in Frosty Pep. Gadget then notices the blue blanket (I see Linus is vacating here too) as the Rangers turn the blanket into a rope against a palm tree (as if the episode title wasn't enough to convince us that we are in Hawaii) and Monty jumps down with the male part while Gadget and Chip use the female end (it's not what you think you sick freaks?!). Gadget then notices that SUNTAN LOTION OF SPF 300 because we need more useless facts on the show. Today's lesson: Suntan lotion is a nice anti-abrasive which allows Gadget to let go of the blanket (because being a sadist is COOL see) and Chip is forced around the palm tree and then takes a bump into Gadget and all the Rangers fall down the side and the blanket gets covered and pulled by the purple octopus. The Rangers huddle together as Monty blows off Gadget's sadism. I approve of Gadget's sadism so go sod off you Aussie stereotype! Gadget doesn't even suspect the blow off and the Rangers get grabbed and squeezed. This is turning into a bad hentai episode; although that is an oxymoron in and around itself since a bad hentai would be (a) well animated and (b) it would be G-rated.
Purple Octopus screams badly as I suspect Mr. Fat is calling his lawyers as we speak on gimmick infringement. The suntan lotion gets squeezed and Purple Octopus gets sprayed as he has no grip left which for some reason is a slightly WORSE transgression on Gadget's part. Thankfully; the Rangers get squeezed out of Purple Octopus' hand and it falls into the sea while the Ranger land with wussy bumps on the cliff. Well; you win some, you lose some. Gadget is happy that this is over; but Monty and Dale blow her off anyway. Monty get punished by slipping and sliding in the lotion and Dale I'm sure is going to get smitten by the LEGAL HAND OF GOD for using the word McNugget in any context during this episode. Gadget finally realizes that she has been blown off and feels bad about it. Chip consoles her to think one way and stick to it which Gadget doesn't exactly like because her way is to do it Kit Cloudkicker style: wing it. Dale proclaims that it's easy; just don't think hard which always works for him. I cannot argue with that overwhelming logic. So; we go to the scene changer as we get a shot of a hotel and animated sea gulls (do you honestly think Sun Woo would animate that?!) and then we pan down to the sand and a brick boardwalk as Monty declares this case is closed. So that scene was a CASE? I thought it was Dale getting into trouble again. Never mind; I'm thinking too hard as Monty wants to catch some rays (good; maybe skin cancer will change his Aussie stereotype tune) before the big luau (Hawaiian word for party I guess. I've never been to Hawaii before.) Dale of course is wearing the white Gillian's Island hat to show how cool he is at dated references and wants to go to the beach; but party pooper Chip grabs him because they are going sight seeing. What is a better sight in Hawaii than the beach Chip?! Other than something dangerous like a volcano perhaps?! Otherwise; I smell fun hater all over him.
Dale blows him off on that and even Monty agrees with Dale on this one. So Chip makes Gadget the deciding vote on this one and Gadget goes with Chip and Monty together: Go sightseeing in their swimsuits. Other than Dale; I say Chip wins that contest. Then Gadget changes her mind and goes with the looking at maps while being a beach. Gadget just knows how to make compromise look so good. Case in Point: Chip wants her to pick just one and of course that leads to Chip and Dale having their argument as per in their contracts. Which leads to Chip and Dale separating in opposite directions. Monty takes Dale's side; Zipper takes Chip's side and Gadget does what Gadget does best: Thinking too hard and being creative. Evidence #2: Go sightseeing on stilts to be closer to the sun. Gadget then proclaims defeat and admits she needs to stop winging solution as we pan up to the hotel to end that segment. So we head to the pool where various humans are either relaxing in chairs, playing ball, diving into the pool or in one case a bum wearing socks is getting sunburned near the pool edge. If something doesn't happen to him in this episode; I'll be so disappointed. We then cut to near a statue overlooking an active volcano (check the volcano acting like a smoker) as a balding fat guy in a brown suit blowing off his repairmen (who is wearing a yellow flower necklace which shows you that you truly get what you pay for) in green because his volcano will not erupt on cue. The repairman flips the switch inside the fake statue and of course NOTHING HAPPENS to the volcano.
The repairman calls it a short which is pretty cute fourth wall break that isn't supposed to be a fourth wall break. The fat man blows that ff by threatening to withhold a payment. Ooookay. So we pan over to a closer shot of the hotel and then down towards the mice version of a Hawaiian village as a girl is pleading for help and all of the Hawaiian mice are standing in front of the big hut for Lawhinie. The big chief pleads for her to make happy with the Huhu volcano gods. That would be the eighth time I have heard the word god in DTVA: five in Darkwing Duck; two in Rescue Rangers and one in TaleSpin. And only twice in vain (Drake's I swear to god; and Kit's Oh My God!) as we cut into Lawhinie's hut as we see Lawhinie (who looks exactly like Gadget but in a different voice and in Hawaiian cultural gear). She gets off god reference #2 (that's nine in DTVA; which is a record for them. No wonder anime purists hate 4Kids; despite 4Kids using the word god several times in Yu-Gi-Oh which is dubbed by 4Kids.) Lawhinie (She better whine in this episode or she's screwed up as a character) twists the sink twister and she whines about breaking a nail thus living to her name about ten seconds in. This is going to be great; I can just see it now. She tries to turn the knob; but it's stuck. Don't you just hate it when that happens. I mean; you're a greasy female heel trying to fake a volcano eruption and it doesn't work somehow. Lawhinie proclaims that if this doesn't work; she's not a queen.
So it finally works and the volcano puffs outside like a smoker which gets a huge pop from the crowd. Yeah; nothing says CLASSIC CARTOON like a smoker; even if it's not a real character....AHHAHAHAHAHA! So Lawhinie pulls the Tiki mask over the twist knob (thus turning heel right there) and then likes the sound of Queen Lawhinie. So she slowly comes out of her hut to the pop of the crowd (because the really nasty bad guys were the good guys now in their eyes. Don Karnage foreshadowing perchance?) . The big mouse chief arrives and according to the Disney Captions (which means take it with a grain of salt) call him HUBBA-BUBBA. Now where is the LEGAL HAND OF GOD when we REALLY NEED IT?! He speaks in broken English by the way as god reference #3 (#10 for DTVA) beckons. I suspect huhu is Hawaiian for angry or mad. The natives pop for her which shows how much it takes to amuse them I guess.
Lawhinie blows kisses to the crowd as Hubba Bubba proclaims that it's time to crown Lawhinie queenie. I think Lawhinie should consider this a bad thing since crowning usually involves bashing someone on the head with a big stick. And of course there is a TEST involved. HAHA! And now she's whining...badly complete with Gruffi pose. Hubba Bubba answers her for me: No one lived to become a queen of this island. That shows you just how sexist these mice are when no female lives to tell the tale. So Hubba Bubba raises his staff and gives DA TESTS: #1 is the LOBSTER TANK OF TERROR. And before you say that I created a funny pun; it's because that is really what Hubba Bubba calls it. Test #2: The COALS OF CATASTROPHE (take one guess what that involves?) and Test #3 is the ultra lame WAVES OF DOOM as the crowd shows how dumb they are in Ooooing on every response. I think the lobster tank one could be interesting. The crowd pops as the tests begin at sundown as Hubba Bubba proclaims that there will be a new queen or an extra hut.
So we head inside Lawhinie's hut BEFORE HAPPY HOUR (read: sunset) as she paces around wondering how to pull this one off. She wants that crown as we see a big mouse wearing a white tank top and red/yellow trunks enters proclaiming to be Lawhinie's boyfriend. Yeah; he talks in surfer talk which is Broken English Style #332. Lawhinie calls him Shakabaka (which is Shake and Stupid in Japanese I do believe; well, the baka part anyway) and then blows him off because she still has to pass the tests see. Shakabaka moves the tiki mask to place his red surfboard next to it. As much as Shakabaka is cool as a name; he's no Kit Cloudkicker because Shakabaka is merely a gimmick Hawaiian surfer trying to be like Mike from TMNT; while Kit was a true character who spoke pretty excellent English for a child. Shakabaka has the perfect plan for Lawhinie: Rig the test just like she rigged the volcano. Lawhinie gets frisky and she grabs his red surfboard and looks like she's going to ruin the finish which causes Shakabaka to panic. Too funny as Lawhinie almost acts like Gadget on speed as Shakabaka reveals the plan to her..and that he didn't tell anyone about her scam. Lawhinie gives him back his surfboard and then jumps on him and kisses him right on the lips. Oooooo; I always love it when Disney gets all kissy-kissy on us. Tells a lot about Hoppo's sex life doesn't it. AHHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummm....
And Shakabaka is a play on Shake & Bake due to the sounding of the words. I think Shake & Stupid is more fitting for him due to the surfing talk; but anime wasn't popular until the late 1990's so I'll live. Lawhinie runs out as Shakabaka realizes that he is a genius. If only you surfer stereotype! So we head to the waterfall display (check the underneath of the case) as we zoom into the side of the river where Gadget is putting corks on her feet proclaiming that she can work on her inventions all by her lonesome. Wow; she IS foreshadowing Kit after all. I guess she knew he was going to be a much better character (I smell flame bait coming at six o'clock) as we pan over stage right to the opposite side while we see Lawhinie on the right side blowing off Hubba Bubba (first time she mentions his name)'s test as she notices Gadget walking on the surface of the water as Lawhinie sees that she won't have to fake anything. She calls herself a genius because as you plainly see; we have two mice who LOOK LIKE GADGET (Minus the voice and duds of course; but I'm sure Hubba Bubba is too dumb to notice anyway). She then realizes that she'll have to con her...ERRRR..convince her to take her place. So she runs to the edge and calls out for Gadget as Gadget continues to look goofy with the corks on her feet. Gadget goes to her asking if she is not trespassing and Lawhinie sezs no and introduces herself.
Gadget does the same and notices the uncanny appearance of Lawhinie as Lawhinie calls it an intriguing name as the gadgets on her feet and of course the corks sink right on cue. Funny stuff as I'm surprised Gadget hasn't said Golly yet. Usually when Gadget gets a lot of dialog; she usually gets in about three or four at this point. Lawhinie grabs a fern leaf which would be MURDERED if it came within fifty feet of Stephen Colbert and helps Gadget to the other side. Gadget admits that she can never decide to cross or walk. She probably cannot decide if Chip or Dale are the better item to pair with. So blame them for her inability to decide which course to take. Lawhinie thinks that's great as Gadget sits down and takes the corks off her feet as Lawhinie does the SWEET TALK OF DOOM as she runs over the tests that Lawhinie should be doing instead of Gadget doing it for her. Nudge, Nudge, Wink, Wink! I think you know what this plot line involves by now. Gadget proclaims that she can figure it out and Lawhinie is HAPPY because she needs Gadget's help now. They walk a bit as Lawhinie wants Gadget to run the tests instead of her and Gadget agrees to it because it's time for sadist Gadget to be subjected to a little sadism from Hubba-Bubba. Now that is irony that even I couldn't have written any better.
Gadget then realizes that Lawhinie looks just like her (just doesn't SOUND like her; but Hubba-Bubba is dumber than a box of hammers; so who cares?!) . She then steals Gadget's googles and puts the red flower in her hair. Ironically; in Her Chance to Dream; Rebecca mentions the sadness of not having a man put a flower in her hair. Gadget tries to act like she's being remorseful for hogging all the action; but Lawhinie doesn't mind that she does; Swear to Pele. I guess Pele is Hawaiian for god which is silly since Donald Drake already said he swears to God in the pilot episode. I guess BS&P is tightening up here. Lawhinie pushes Gadget aside as Gadget states that she has to be with the Rangers; but Lawhinie proclaims that they are her friends now and she'll help her take care of them while her friends take care of Gadget. That scene is just too funny and Gadget looks so naïve it's too funny as Lawhinie walks away wishing her good luck with the test....ERR...fun. HEE HEE! I just love greasy female heels who look like Gadget. So Lawhinie runs away and hides as the native jump Gadget from behind with the sock as the test officially begins for her. So we cut to the brick boardwalk as Monty, Chip and Dale are looking for Gadget as they are supposed to be back for the big party...I mean luau. Lawhinie tries to grab another fern leaf on top of a hill on the cutback; but it snaps (see what I mean with Colbert MURDERING it?!) and she falls and lands right in Chip's arms. Well; that decides who Gadget will date forever doesn't it?!
Lawhinie gets off Chip's arms and calls him Chop. HAHA! This is going to be fun as the Rangers are confused at the name (but still sell the voice; which is why Tress should have been voicing here in the scenes with the Rangers and Deborah Walley (Drag Racer, Benji, and Gidget Goes Hawaiian (hence the episode pun) as Gidget. HAHA!) do the heel voice when she's not with the Rangers. It makes for more realism and doesn't blow Lawhinie's cover too quickly.). So we cut back to the lobster tank of terror as the native guards (wearing fig leaves and loin cloths) throw Gadget who is inside the sock upon Hubba-Bubba's command into the water and then cut back to Lawhinie being escorted by Dale as Lawhinie sees that Gadget's sock sinks to the bottom and this could blow her cover so she takes Dale and kisses him right on the lips. HAHA! I see the debate rages on. Dale gets all charmed after the kissy-kissy stuff (complete with lip makeup on lips mind you.) and Chip blows her off because he SAVED her. I betcha Lawhinie runs over and kisses him in kind. I check the DVD....Damn; I'm good. Kiss not so good though as we get a shot with the tank and sock sinking down (which somehow gains about eight inches of space since we last saw it).
Lawhinie walks off because she wants a party ...ERRR...Luau. The Rangers follow as two red lobster enter into the tank from opposite directions and surround Gadget inside the sock. Well; Miss Hackwrench; you want to be a sadist, then this is your reward for being one I guess. The sock opens when the three lobsters (now?!) pinch on the sock and Gadget pops out. Gadget swims up as Lawhinie sees that she forgot something and nearly blows her cover about three different times before saying wrench and runs off. Those Rangers are just too dumb; although when you get kissed hard by Lawhinie; you would act pretty stupid too. So we cut to the lobster tank as the native watch on in fear as we get a shot of Lawhinie hiding behind some long blades of grass on the bottom left side of the tank. We then cut to a near shot of the water as Gadget pops up and swims to the left side of the tank as Lawhinie is RIGHT THERE to tell her to swim to the other side of the tank. One problem though; She was thrown on the right side of the tank; so in reality; Gadget should have already passed part one of the test. Then again; Lawhinie didn't see Gadget being thrown so it's not a logic break and more of Lawhinie just being a heel which suits me just fine. Gadget pleads for mercy because she'll never make it (even though she ALREADY DID in reality); but Lawhinie stands firm because she has faith in her to make it; remembering to be really heelish by stepping on Gadget's hand. Notice that she merely steps on them gently enough to force Gadget to let go instead of really stomping on the fingers?! That's because if she did the later; Gadget would have realized that she is a heel and Lawhinie doesn't WANT her to know that until at least all three tests are completed. A little detail like that makes the difference between a good heel and a bad heel. Gadget sinks again as Lawhinie blames her clumsiness on her stepping as we pan down to the bottom of the tank where the lobsters are ready to cut Gadget to ribbons as they pinch their claws to end the segment nearly ten and a half minutes in.
After the commercial break; we cut to the water edge as Lawhinie calls this a snap and we then cut between Lawhinie and Gadget dodging the lobsters in a really sadistic moment as Gadget swims behind the glass mirror while a crab stalks her. Lawhinie's trust me promo just makes her all that more heelish as Gadget notices the sock floating down to the ground and swims to it. She climbs up to the top where the blowhole is as the lobster spots her with the eyes of doom The lobster clips the air hose which gives Gadget a chance to grab the sock and swim up to the tube (while dodging the snapping claws mind you) and fill the sock with air which is silly for obvious reason; but whatever. It turns into a cotton (or nylon) balloon as Gadget ties the balloon together and climbs on top of it. The lobster then invokes the claw to pop the sock balloon and Gadget rides shotgun as she pops out of the water in a really awesome visual and lands right in front of Hubba Bubba (with the natives smart enough to bail away) who calls this test high. HAHA! Sadly; Gadget takes a wussy bump onto the ground which should have been MAN-SIZED. I know Gadget is female but COME ON! I think she can take a nasty bump. Gadget mumbles as she wiggles out of the sock in a funny spot and Shakabaka praises her skills. Gadget tells him that there is a problem here; which Hubba Bubba agrees because she has two more tests left which Gadget starts whining herself...better than Lawhinie herself. HAHA!
The natives cover her in the sock as Shakabaka tells her not to worry because she'll be the head queen type person. Lawhinie doesn't need to do anything until Gadget passes the third test. The natives are that dumb. They are very stupid. And no one has learned anything which is apporos are such a pointless song. The native escort her stage right as Hubba Bubba proclaims that the next place is the BBQ pit. If you don't know what the next test entails; you have no business reading this rant...So we logically go to more shots of the hotel brick deck DURING HAPPY HOUR (Read: The big party or Luau.) as the Hawaiian human being whoop it up Hawaiian style. That includes drinking and dancing with sticks set on fire. See; make the joke and pay it off. And the hula dance spot gets involved of course as two Hawaiian chipmunks wearing bathing suits carry a coconut cup of punch away into a mouse hole and we cut to inside the mice luau as the mice natives toast marshmallows. Isn't that a little bit out of place for this setting guys?! We then pan over northeast towards the Rangers PLUS Fake Gadget as the male Rangers toast marshmallows. Well; except for Zipper who's sitting on them of course. They get a fire pit which is next to a nice clam shell as shade which is pointless since it's HAPPY HOUR after all. Zipper tries a toothpick to roast his mellow and it gets torched so badly that it disappears into thin air. Must be the ones Drake uses in Bearskin Thug.
Zipper is pissed off because of this and I betcha Drake gets a beak beating after this episode is over. Monty gulps one in one bite and calls them boneless. Which explains the lack of spine Lawhinie has. AHHAHAHAHA! POW OUCH! Ummm....Chip and Dale don't want anymore because they are full see. Dale is sure having fun until Lawhinie gets the LIGHTBULB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY and bails to get her hammer (making sure to nearly blow her cover again). Monty then remembers that Gadget NEVER forgets her tools and something is amiss. We cut to a brick hallway as the native drag the sacred sock containing Gadget to the next test; as the waves sound from Lawhinie as she is wave calling Shakabaka and he hears the waves and tries to run with surfboard but Lawhinie pulls him by the tail. Cute spot there as Shakabaka waves to Lawhinie as we get a funny scene where Shakabaka is so stupid that he forgets that Lawhinie is faking the test and then leaves to get back in the sock. So that logically leads to the BBQ pit as Gadget is using the tongs to balance herself on a rope to get across it. And Gadget starts whining and I think this is how Hubba Bubba thinks that she Lawhinie because otherwise he is REALLY STUPID. And of course there are hens on the stick above just to make the whole thing even more surreal. The natives no sells because they truly believe she is Lawhinie. Hey Gadget love; stop whining. That might make them sell you as a fake as Gadget slowly slides on the tightrope as the rope snaps due to the heat. Well; at least the rope snapping spot is apporos here.
Gadget tries to focus her center of gravity but gets confused again on decisions as the rope snaps and the tongs land feet first on the hot coals as Gadget has made some makeshift stilts. Okay; this will make it easier as Gadget walks slowly towards the other side as she sees Lawhinie with the Rangers and that's enough for her trip over and fall right into the soft marsh mellows of sticky doom right behind the clam shell with a MAN-SIZED bump. Now that's the spirit WD-Japan! Lawhinie calls this an awesome floor show and shoos the Rangers stage left as Marshmallow Gadget arises from the grave with muffled yelling. Lawhinie keeps Chip away as Chip wants to help her; but Lawhinie plays interference and still gets his name wrong. HAHA! Well; Chip leads Dale 2-1 in the kissy-kissy department now. The other Rangers don't know what to make of this. We then see the natives all run in front of the Rangers and they cheer for Lawhinie as they do the football victory spot much to the disgust of Gadget love. Lawhinie nearly blows her cover and thanks Chip for the kiss which is pretty funny. Chip gets so charmed that he sees hearts of love and walks up into the air and defies gravity. Hoppo must be so jealous despite fat floating; her head is as hard as a rock. AHHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummm... Monty grabs Chip's ankle to bring him down to earth (in body only; the soul is flying away as we speak) as Lawhinie realizes that Gadget is on to her heelish ways now judging by that look as she then snaps her fingers and gets a real plan: Control Gadget by controlling the Rangers as Chip still keeps defying gravity. So that logically leads to....
...the smoking fake volcano (WHICH IS BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH, MOVIE RATING AND BAD DARKWING...DUCK EPISODES!) as Lawhinie is on top of the volcano as the Rangers are inside the fake volcano which is clearly fake do to the machine making fire inside. Lawhinie asks if they found her tools (while almost blowing her cover again) and Chip and Dale say no. However; Monty doesn't sell because they are inside a fake volcano! I think that's enough to say that something isn't right here. So Monty gets punished by getting roped. HAHA! Lawhinie proclaims that the rope slipped. I agree with her (well; she dropped it on purpose; but the animators did a bang up job making me believe otherwise. See A Star Is Torn where I believed back in the day that Kit Cloudkicker on walkers was the one creating most of the accidents in order to get a part in the film. Of course it's was clearly Kitten; but I was 17 back then and didn't know any better) and of course the chipmunks sell it like she did it unintentionally. Monty of course no sells as Zipper grabs on the end of the rope and tries to climb up to Lawhinie; so Lawhinie thanks him and then stuffs Zipper in her red purse. Now that is EVIL man.
So Monty is angry as Lawhinie closes her red backpack (I guess) and runs off as the smoke from the fake volcano arises and the male Rangers are seriously screwed as we cut to the shoreline with lots of killing stones as Hubba-Bubba and Shakabaka are on the rocks with the natives looking on. Hubba Bubba has the hourglass and sets it as the final test begins as Gadget walks with a red surfboard on her back (how nice of Shakabaka to give her his board?!) into the water. Hubba Bubba explains DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!): Live to surf when the sand on the timer runs out and she's queen of the tribe so to speak. He turns the hourglass down and the test begins as Gadget throws her surfboard away LIKE A MAN and blows them off because she's now Lawhinie. Memo to Gadget: Talk calmly otherwise they are going to keep believing that you are La_whine_ie. AHHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Umm..That's the first time Gadget has ever punched me in the face. And a good pop too.
She then sees Lawhinie behind the rocks whistling and of course WD-Japan screws up as Lawhinie is wearing Gadget's yellow bathing suit despite wearing Hawaiian gear throughout this episode. Gadget runs to Lawhinie being glad to see her here and tries to give her the surfboard; but Lawhinie pushes it back because there are sharks in the ocean (helpfully shown as such when we cut to the ocean shot). Lawhinie then threatens her to finish the test; or the Rescue Rangers are Burned To Ashes Rangers so to speak. Gadget looks really pissed off as Lawhinie proclaims that they got too close to the volcano and fell in. I just love Lawhinie acting like a heel despite having the babyface looks. I see Kitten Kaboodle was taught well. Gadget doesn't believe her; so Lawhinie invokes the red backpack and shows Zipper to her. Lawhinie pushes Gadget back towards the shoreline and orders her to finish the test; or the Rangers are finished. Gadget kneels onto the surfboard and swims towards the deep ocean to end the segment nearly sixteen and a half minutes in...
After the commercial break; we cut back to the fake volcano as the male Rangers Minus Zipper do the human ladder spot to get up on the pipe. Take one guess who's on bottom as Chip makes Monty smells his feet. HAHA! Sadly; the steam blows from the furnace on Dale's ass and he screams like a bastard. Damn; I went almost seventeen minutes without swearing; but the animators just couldn't help amusing themselves at Dale's expense. Dale does a cute spot of floating before he falls and the chipmunks lands on Monty's back again. Monty twiddles his fingers on his stomach wondering what this deja vu is. It's called being matrressed. AHHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummm.... Chip goes for plan B as we cut back to Gadget riding the waves and thus paying off my joke from the captions at the beginning of this rant. The waves continue to crash on the rocks as Lawhinie calls her to make her queen. Gadget surfs around thinking of ways to rewire the volcano while confusing herself in the process. The natives cheer for Lawhinie so at least they are hiding their lust for death here; or they are simply dumb sadists. I'll accept either answer at this point. Lawhinie pops up as a child native crawls towards her. Lawhinie tells her to hurry up or something something as the wave crashes and the child is swept away. I just knew these natives were child abusers; can we call Child Mouse Services on them?! AHHAHAHAHAHA!
Gadget surfs around and hears the child pleads for help and just as that happens; she finally gets off the first golly of the episode at around seventeen and a half minutes in. She tries some more science talk and then decides just to save the child anyway...or as Kit would do it: Wing it. Or is that WildCat?! Or is it both?! Lawhinie blows her off for going the wrong way like a good heartless heel should; Gadget surfs around the wave as we cut to the child struggling around a bunch of sharks. Gadget times it just right and grabs the child on the back end by the arm just as the happy victory music plays. This episode is just ruling now as the shark is hungry for mice burgers when he pops up. We cut back to the shoreline (as I just noticed that one of the torches is a makeshift birthday candle. HAHA!) as Lawhinie blows Gadget off for stopping. Like Gadget is going to stop with about THREE SHARKS behind her?! I think Lawhinie is finally whining properly. Gadget kneels and the wave grabs the surfboard and they rise up to the top. Lawhinie is SHOCKED and deeply (insert bad swear word here) as the wave rises towards her (cute spot with the child enjoying himself ala Molly Cunningham) and everyone bails on cue with Hubba Bubba dropping the hourglass as the wave comes down and both Gadget and child play water slide. HAHA! Lawhinie gets swamped as WD-Japan manages to confuse me by having two surfboards comes in the same sequence. Must be a bad reel on the master tape as the wave dies and out pops Gadget and the child safely on the rocks.
Lawhinie is on her midsection as she has the hourglass proclaiming victory because she did it. HAHA! She is such heel. I'm amazed she didn't become a TaleSpin character and be Kitten's aunt. She would be perfect for the role. Gadget opens the backpack and Zipper is out dizzy to the gills. Well; at least he didn't get drunks on the roids from Larson and Gary. Gadget and child run away to save the Rangers; but have a meeting of the minds with Shakabaka. And it wasn't at the hot dog stand. Shakabaka grabs Gadget in a nice way and tells her that she has to be crown queen of the trible as Gadget sees star. Wow; that was one sick bump Gadget took...and it's the dumb surfer dude how apporos. Lawhinie finally pushes Gadget aside (which I'm sure Gadget would allow her without any second thoughts) because she is supposed to be crowned queen. The natives enter as Hubba Bubba declares Gadget is Lawhinie which Gadget blows off. Both the fact that she's Lawhinie and that Lawhinie is nice. Lawhinie blows her off because the volcano god listens to her getting off god reference #4 (#11 for DTVA). Hubba Bubba no sells because she never did the tests and Lawhinie blows it off because all she had to do was live until morning and she did. Shakabaka tries to reason with her; but Lawhinie walks off because the volcano gods will decide this. Gadget tries to leave; but Hubba Bubba won't let her because the volcano gods are angry. Rescue Rangers just surpassed Darkwing Duck in references to god with a half dozen. Shakabaka doesn't like this and Gadget storms off making sure to add god reference #7 (#14 for DTVA). The natives follow her as we logically lead to....
....THE HUT THAT LA-WHINE-IE BUILT as Lawhinie enters her hut and goes to the tiki mask which has returned to it's original position near the lever. Hmm; I didn't know the tiki mask had feet on them. She throws it away and pushes the lever (WRONG LEVER!) getting off god reference #8 for the episode (#15 for DTVA). Sadly; the lever breaks; but the lever is pushed and that turns on the smoking volcano as we return inside as the Rangers Minus Gadget and Zipper use the rope to hang onto the pipe. Chip calls this one Plan Q. Chip takes the MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN to a whole new level of failure here. Sadly; the pipe underneath has a sprayer and it's a flamethrower as the rope snaps and burns right on cue. HAHA! Time for MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN R; for roasted Rangers. HAHA! The volcano engines roar as the volcano of doom smokes like a smoker on three packs a day as we cut to Lawhinie in front of the volcano telling the panicky natives to crown her queen; or the volcano will destroy the village thus allowing god reference #9 for the episode. I guess this is to make up for the lack of death references in Seer No Evil. Gadget drags Shakabaka towards Lawhinie as she is going to stop all this and asks where the main pipe is. Nice to see Gadget sees through this facade even if the natives are dumber than hammers.
Shakabaka then in a nice matter turns on Lawhinie and points to some grass leaves. Gadget runs to them and cuts through them to find the main golden pipe. Gadget proclaims that she needs something to pop the line so Zipper steals Shakabaka's surfboard much to the dismay of Shakabaka. I see Zipper is back on the roids again. Must have stolen Shakabaka's secret stash he got during a shrinking trip with Larson and Gary. AHHAHAHAHAHA! Gadget grabs the surfboard from Zipper and wedges it against the main pipe as Shakabaka whines because he had it polished. Well; at least Shakabaka doesn't like this because his surfboard is involved and not because he's in love with Lawhinie. They jump on three and the first two don't get enough weight; and yet a blue bottle fly is enough weight to prop the board up and pop the main pipe. It's ROID RAGE; there is no other way to explain that spot. The volcano begins to split apart as the native pop for that spot and Lawhinie comes very close Gadget a bitch as we cut to the hole near the main pipe as Chip, Dale and Monty run out DA...HOLE! Man; those males are REALLY STUPID to NOT FIND that hole BEFORE this all happened. Oh well; I love Gadget so I don't care if the finish is a little contrived. And we got GOOFY CHIPMUNK ON FIRE! HAHA! Take one guess who he is. Hint: He's wearing the Gillian's hat.
Shakabaka proclaims that Gadget saved the village while calling her Lawhinie-likeness. Too funny as Gadget proclaims that she's not done yet as we cut to the humans watching the fake volcano puff up in awe and then it simply dies right on cue with a sputter. HAHA! The humans are so disappointed as I am because that bum in socks was just dying to be used. The Fat Manager of Doom is angry as hell at the green repairman who has his tools as he looks for his pipe wrench in his toolbox. Which logically leads back to Lawhinie's hut as she's using the pipe wrench to open the volcano again (why?! The pipe is busted beyond repair.) and I speak for all fans when I say this: You lost Lawhinie; get over it! We cut to outside as Gadget tells the natives and Rangers that the problem is solved as she picked one thing and stuck with it. Then we cut to the hut close up shot as Lawhinie storms out of hut and proclaims that this village is history and they should start packing. So we cut to the pipe which somehow has repaired itself and we see a blob enter the volcano splitting the foundation even more. The natives gasp in horror as the volcano finally explodes and it shoots....marshmallows!! TOTAL MARKUP CITY FOR THAT SPOT! Even the humans approve of this surprise as the marsh mellows rain down on everyone.
The Rangers run away as Monty points out the obvious. Gadget explains that she stuffed them inside the pipe and thus giving Kit Cloudkicker the spot where he moved the dynamite and blew Douglas Benson clear off Louie's Island making him even MORE VIOLENT than Don Karnage ever was. Lawhinie runs stage left and gets marsh mellowed. HAHA! Lawhinie looks up and she's a marsh mellow lady. HAHA! So we cut back to the village as Hubba Bubba and the Rangers exchange notes as the male Rangers thank Gadget for saving the village. Gadget blushes and remembers to get off Golly #2 for the episode. Chip and Dale try to kiss Gadget from either side and Gadget ducks them and the chipmunks completely blow the spot as a result. DAMN YOU BS&P FOR YOUR HOMOPHOBIC ATTITUDES!! They still sell the spit just to make it worse as Monty and Zipper proclaim that that's their Gadget and Monty ends with a wink at 21:15. So close...So close to #2; but WD-Japan blew a few spots because BS&P is such a homophobic jerk. Still; a near perfect episode otherwise because Gadget just damn carried this episode kicking and screaming. And so did Lawhinie for that matter....**** ¾ (95%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Well; this was no surprise to me as the first Gadget focused episode was a smashing success. However; I was surprised as how well Lawhinie came off as the slimy heel who just used Gadget's own naïve nature against her in this one throughout. I wasn't surprised at how dumb Chip, Dale, Hubba Bubba and the natives were as Lawhinie looked like Gadget in every way; except for the fact that she was more into love than Gadget ever was. She was the jock to Gadget's dork personality as they say. So even though it was clear to the audience that it was Gadget doing all the work in this episode while Lawhinie acted like the effective slimy heel that she was; the characters are either too charmed or too dumb to notice. Or in Monty's case too fat and in Zipper's case; too tied up to do anything about it. Gadget took this episode from start to finish and ran with it giving me a lot of sympathy for her and also building her character to be a little less of a sadist after all the sadistic tests she went through by the natives.
Also; I'm surprised at the liberal use of the word god in this episode. Sure; I heard it in Darkwing Duck several times; but it was on full force here. TaleSpin was a more mature series than Rescue Rangers and yet only once did that show use the word god and it was with Kit saying it in vain. Of course TaleSpin had seventeen references to the word die in Barely Alive so it evens it out. This episode could have been perfect had it not had a few little contrived areas like the male Rangers escaping from a hole near the main pipe which made them look quite weak and of course WD-Japan completely screwing up the double kiss miss spot at the end (and I don't buy that WD-Japan screwed it up because they are terrible since WD-Japan was their best in house studio at the time. It was BS&P plain and simple since the kiss was going to meet male lips guys.); however, overall this was a really great way to show Gadget first focus episode. Now I hope Dirty Rotten Diapers and The Case of the Cola Cult can match up in quality soon. Next up is Dale's next good episode because he's a bird and he's insane. Well; he was always insane....So.....
Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you next time.
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