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A Lad In A Lamp
Reviewed: 02/22/2009
Sounds like Eisner's attempt to bottle Kit Cloudkicker to me...
Well; with the exception of Battle of the Bulge, Fake Me To Your Leader, Robocat and The Case of the Cola Cult; we are now in cruise control mode for the remainder of the series and thus most of the episodes I haven't really seen. So; let's rant on shall we....?!
This episode is written by Eric Lewald. The story was edited by Bryce Malek and supervised by Tad Stones. The animation is done by A-1 Productions which is a huge surprise to me since I don't remember them ever animating anything on DTVA.
We begin this one on a foggy night on a bridge with probably the most unique form of darkness shading I have ever seen: The gray/yellow effect. Seriously; it looks like the city is filled with smog on a bright morning day even though it is AFTER HAPPY HOUR (read: After Dark) . We zoom in to see a trench coat detective with the steel briefcase on the right meeting with a guy who has a look similar to Fry, Rocco and goodness knows who else. We the cut to the top of the bridge where there is a bird with a blue sailor cap looking on for no reason other than to waste time I guess. The detective fishes out the MONEY, MONEY, YEAH, YEAH proclaiming that he has payment and he wants the artifact from the Uglier Than Fry Fry Clone. He gets a paper bag of shame as Fry Clone proclaims in a creepy voice that he's getting a smuggled priceless treasure that is not easy. And then the bird (who just added a black patch to his right eye for logic break #1 for the episode) swoops down and uses his mouth to steal the paper bag away and even causes the money to be flown away. Wow; good start on the animation from A-1; even down to making the detective guy look faceless. I only saw that in a Mister T episode from the Agony Booth. And of course Fry Clone is busted because the money is fake and the detective guy is well; a real detective. Geez; a trench coat, fedora hat and pants; and that dumb crook didn't see the obvious stereotype coming a mile away. For that matter; didn't Eric Lewald either?!
We then pan over with a shot of the dock towards the cheese factory which means the episode just got depressing as we see Monty and Zipper going through DA...HOLE with sacks of Limburger Cheese. Okay; people complain about the immorality of the new Disney shows in recent years. So what is so moral about Monty stealing a cheese factory's...well..cheese? It's things like this that show just how silly the ADM really is. And don't get me started on Kit Cloudkicker again because that will take two weeks of explaining to do in itself. Monty puts the cheese down to allow Zipper to sniff it and he drops dead into the cheese. Good going there Aussie Stereotype; you MURDERED your best friend there. Weapon of choice: The Cheesatche~! AHHAHAHAHAHAHA! Monty grabs Zipper and blows him off for stealing his cheese. Wow; what nastiness and projection there Monty; but at least you are not guilty of murder; so it's all right. So we cut to the docks near a wooden tugboat which puts us back near the Ranger's home of course as we see Mr. Fat, Mepps and Mole on deck. About damn time he showed up. Mr. Fat whines about someone showing up; but Mole proclaims that he cannot see due to the fog being thick as a brick. You know; if this were real life; we would barely see Mole in the shot at all. Logic break #2 for the episode and we are barely two minutes in.
Mr. Fat thankfully grabs him by the shirt and gleefully blows him off for me as we walk to the front of the ship as he dangles Mole over the edge. So we cut to Wart and Mepps near the smoke stack as Mole proclaims that this thing most be important to Mr. Fat. NO?! REALLY?! He's trying to drown Mole and it doesn't sound important to thee? Mr. Fat drops Mole and he takes a wussy bump on the floor which indicates that A-1 is codeword for Sun Woo as Mr. Fat talks about rumors, myths, paid informers as he tries to choke Mepps; but Mepps proclaims that he is here and the pelican pirate bird arrives with the package. Man; does the detective look like a dumbass now doesn't he? Then again; it's a Tad Stones production so you know....Mr. Fat grabs the brown paper bag and rips it to reveal the CHEST OF DEMONS and in this case it glows gold so to speak. Then the pelican bird wants what is coming to him. Oh man; that is like inviting death there pal as Mr. Fat sells it and Mepps and Wart grab the pelican by the ankles and spins him around and drops him into the ocean below. Wow; even Tad Stones hates ducks...well; until he started producing Darkwing Duck around this time which is kind of like getting a pardon from the church after molesting 30 small children. Or maybe not.
The pelican sputters and gets tangled in seaweed (good animation from A-1 by the way) as Mr. Fat tells him to send them his bill. Cue the bad laugh of doom as I say this: Which bill? The duck's bill, the bill of services rendered; or Mr. Pelican's gay partner. AHHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummm....The pelican bird proclaims that he will get his revenge on them as he snaps the seaweed and then flies away from Mr. Fat. Huh?! If this guy calls cowardice revenge; then he should be Bushroot's henchmen because God only knows if Bushroot gets buried by Drake full of himself Mallard again. And then Mr. Fat talks about world domination and then the Pelican Bird steals the CHEST OF DEMONS out of nowhere. Wow; this is like Kit Cloudkicker only without the element of surprise to make it look awesome. See; this is why people REMEMBER Plunder and Lightning and NOT this episode. Pelican Bird blows him off calling him Fat Sap. HEE HEE! That's the first really good insult of Mr. Fat right there actually as Mr. Fat orders his men to stop the pelican bird and bring him down. Good luck there fools; it took kidnapping Rebecca and Molly; and then getting them and Baloo in a compromising situation where Kit turned on his family to save them to get that treasure back. And without guns; you are hosed Mr. Fat.
Wart then points out exactly what I'm thinking; so Mr. Fat grabs Wart by the neck (Huh? Isn't Mole supposed to be the bump machine here?) and throws him like a lawn dart which takes a nasty bump into pelican's behind and that officially drops the CHEST OF DEMONS and Wart into the sea. Mr. Fat panics because as Mepps proclaims; the fog is too thick despite us seeing about 2 miles away. These Disney are either blind or dumber than meat. The chest of demons floats stage left as the fog suddenly gets thicker and we cut to under the docks as Monty is eating his sack of cheese and then starts hearing Mr. Fat command Mole and Mepps to row for their lives because the chest is drifting too far into the fog. Mole drags Wart into the boat on cue as Monty states the obvious and wonders what he is looking for. I wonder what Monty's father would think about Monty stealing cheese from good hard working people? Zipper flies into the fog and squeaks to Monty as he found the CHEST OF DEMONS. Monty uses the oar to drag the chest to the edge while saying bonzer job to Zipper. Does anyone minus Steve Irwin say that bonzer word down under? Seriously; I WANT TO KNOW! Monty plops down and opens the chest as he sees the magic lamp from Ducktales and Aladdin. Oh boy; there is one plot line I hope I never see again in a million years. This is seriously overplayed even by Disney's recently lowered standards.
Zipper giggles on that cue and Monty is unimpressed at Zipper's laughing at him. My opinion of Zipper just went up about two notches as Monty wants to rub the lamp and be up his whiskers in wishes. Well; this is now officially a Monty focused episode and with an overexposed plotline like this, this episode is going to really suck now. Monty rubs the lamp and it rumbles violently and the pink smoke magic comes out of the spout as we cut to about three miles away from shore as Mr. Fat whimpers. Wasn't the heels rowing TOWARDS the lamp which means that they should be about 100 feet away? Logic break #3 for the episode and we are not even five minutes in. The lamp spews out the most deformed genie I have ever seen. I mean he looks like a really lame cousin to the genie from Aladdin and I betcha we get the Z-grade material even Genie from Aladdin would never be caught dead using. And it's another Jim Cummings character as he grants him three wishes. BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! He awaits his commands as Monty gets giddy as the rowboat lands and Mr. Fat is SHOCKED, APPALLED and downright PISSED as it's a Rescue Ranger who has screwed him. Even worse; it's Monty of all rangers which has got to really be a bad sign of burial for him. Monty swears in DUBBED ANIME STYLE as A-1 cannot even get the artwork correct (check Monty's feet) as he wishes that the others could see this and of course the genie grants him his wish, DUH! The genie uses the tornado and they disappear from the area which allows Mr. Fat to channel the awesome power of Crybaby Christian. Yeah; just what this episode needs: More windbags and crybabies.
And so we cut into Rescue Ranger Headquarters inside the living room area as the tornado entrances causes Monty to make a mess of things which I'm sure Dale will be blamed for in a few minutes. Sadly; Chip and Dale are in the double bunk beds asleep as they wake up on cue and jump down. Funny how Chip is in Kit's undershirt (minus the yellow patch); but Dale is still wearing the Hawaiian shirt. Rebel! Everyone runs into the living room as Gadget asks if Monty is all right. Chip ignores that (YAY!) and notices the golden lamp as Monty explains it which Chip blows off with a giggle. Well; Chip's giggle is better than his laugh; but that just makes him sound like a little girl. Monty uses Zipper as his defense and Zipper agrees with Monty. Yeah; like I'm going to take a blue bottle fly who is Monty's friend seriously when it comes to telling facts. Dale of course believes Monty (what a shock?) and wants to rub the lamp but Monty pulls on his shirt from behind to stop him. Oh; let him rub the lamp once you Aussie Stereotype...and then the episode won't suck. Why is Dale's shirt look like a female night gown? Monty wants to finish his wishes as he rubs the lamp again and the genie hits his head hard appearing. The genie wonders if he has been summoned and Monty proclaims the first too right of the episode. When golly appears after too right first; you know this episode is going to suck.
The other Rangers are actually smart enough to hide behind the turn over chair and table even though it will not protect them against power of suck. Monty of course wants lots of cheese. Well; at least Eric Lewald doesn't make Monty go berserk to murder the psychology of the spot...yet. The genie grants his wish, DUH! But not before Monty wastes more time to annoy me some more with bonzer #2 for the episode. Oh lord; why do you test me so?! Monty also shows no respect to the genie by grabbing onto his blue vest just to annoy me even more. Thankfully; genie goes back into the lamp and takes a MAN-SIZED bump onto the floor. Everyone goes to check on the knocked out Monty and Dale wonders where the cheese is. I wonder where the heck did Dale find that night gown of is? We then get rumbling and on cue Monty goes into the CHEESE ADDICITION OF DOOM. Well; there goes my good graces for an average episode right there guys. A-1 seems to be having major problems getting the artwork right here. It looks like something out of a Eckhart animated series. As in; really stiff. The entire living room and doors get destroyed by the wave of swiss cheese which makes zero sense since cheese is much harder than a wave of cheese like this. I don't even recall swiss cheese retaining their holes if it melts either. Logic break #4 for the episode at the seven minute mark. That leads to the cheese wave which Monty surfs. OH TAG!
Gadget and the rest pop from the cheese tomb as Gadget gets the first golly of the episode at almost seven and a half minutes in. She proclaims that she needs some crackers to go with the cheese. I think this episode needs more than crackers; it needs a emmna, pronto. At least Tress' acting has not gone south as Dale is upside down in the cheese with his head stuck swearing like a good chipmunk would; just to be Dale. Chip and Gadget pull Dale out and Dale gets stuffed mouth with cheese. HAHA! Chip then makes me proud as he slaps Dale in the back of the head and Dale shoots the cheese out of his mouth. That's the second good spot of the episode by the way. Monty loves this (That makes one of us) and dives into the cheese eating it like Scrooge dives into his gold coins in the money bin. Dale gets giddy and wonder if it would work with peanuts as he tries to run to the lamp; making sure to run over Chip in the process which A-1 screws up badly; but Monty stops him with his pot belly and Dale goes flying right into the hands of Chip and Gadget in a cute spot. What a greedy bastard this Monty fellow this?! Monty blows them off for touching his lamp before he made his third wish. Sorry; but Asshole BumbleScrooge Ace (as sezs Butterwood Bear) is still better than Asshole Monty Cheesehead Jack. AHHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummm...and then Gadget gets PISSED off as he blows off Monty for acting like an asshole. You tell him Gadget love! And you say that to Michael Eisner about how he buried Kit Cloudkicker as well as yourself too; and watch it go downhill from there. Gadget then storms off getting one last final insult and then Chip drops Dale like a bad habit because Dale like the lamp anyway. Dale runs off with the Rangers away; which makes absolutely zero sense either since Dale cares to rub the lamp. Logic break #5 for the episode as Monty tries to say that he didn't mean it; but let's face it, he meant it.
Monty slumps down and sulks calling himself a bloomin idiot for letting the wishing go to his head. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. And unlike Baloo; I have zero sympathy for Monty because while Baloo was a jerk; he was probably the best pilot in the world (until Kit grows up of course. POW! OUCH! Hey!). Monty doesn't have anything that makes me want to..you know...justify the jerkiness. The genie reappears to tell him that he used up his two wishes (after Monty is surprised that he has only one left. Memo to Monty: Three wishes. You said I wish twice. Get over yourself.) and thus that's logic break #6 for the episode since the genie was supposed to be inside the lamp. The genie then offers a deal: Monty gives him the weekend off and Monty gets unlimited wishes forever. Okay; this is an interesting twist; but I wish it was Dale instead of Monty because Dale is a MIRACLE WORKER BABEE! Monty swears in DUBBED AUSSIE STYLE and wishes that the genie was free of the lamp which the genie crackles with evil which makes him a heel by proxy.
He grants the wish as the windbag arrives and we see the genie wearing Monty's outfit outside of the headquarters. Somehow; he looks about 500% more manly in it than his original outfit so it fits. Sadly; the genie isn't exactly happy about the outfit either. And of course the genie takes the lamp out of the coat and Monty starts protesting this outrage because he's inside the lamp wearing the gay outfit. HAHA! 1000000% improvement already as Monty is seriously (insert swear word here) and the genie tells him that he'll be back in 5000 years and throws the lamp behind the bushes while laughing badly. The genie leaves as Monty sputters on the feather pillows (YAY!) and admits that he really screwed up this time. However; he has a MIMI JOKE ZONE PLAN to counter as he wants someone to rub the lamp and wish for the genie to return to his lamp. Problem: he burned his bridges with almost all of the Rangers already as Monty yells for help and it sounds like Mr. Fat for some strange and stupid reason. I thought Peter Cullen was voicing Monty for this episode? Logic break #7 for the episode as we cut to outside the bushes as Mepps and Wart pop up as they hear something and smell cheese as Mole does his required MAN-SIZED bump for no reason just to be a bump machine onto the ground when he pops out of the bushes and then into the lamp as Mepps and Wart pop back out for no reason other than logic break #8. What is this; a Darkwing Duck lost episode? Mepps is happy because Mr. Fat won't kill them (death reference #1) as Wart proclaims that they will be rich beyond their wildest dreams because Genie Monty is now Mr. Fat's bitch...ERRR..slave and Monty bites on his fingers scared as the segment ends 11 minutes in. Okay; this episode is actually starting to turn around after a really horrible start...Still; Monty as a genie? WHAT THE HELL----?!
After the commercial break; we head with a city shot as the Rangerplane is chugging along with Gadget proclaiming that she cannot believe Monty would disappear and leave all the cheese. Yeah; I cannot believe it either since Monty is known to eat truckloads of it. Dale keeps throwing Swiss cheese out of the plane as Chip continues to blow Monty off which I approve. Dale then uses his pointy finger below as Gadget proclaims that it is the genie who is standing in front of a mob getting blown off by the store manager who is explaining to the police that the genie is a nut because he bought a rug and then wants his money back because it cannot fly. That store keeper is Mr. Hardcore because only Mr. Hardcore would screw him out of his money for deceptive advertising. The genie rightfully blows him off because the rug is defective. Now there is a lawsuit Jack Thompson would actually had a chance of winning; if he wasn't disbarred from practicing law forevermore. Moral lesson of the rant: Pick your spots carefully. The Rangers wonder why the genie is there and not in his lamp? Of course the police officer takes Mr. Hardcore's side and the genie storms off proclaiming that he'll hear from his “lawyer” friend. I put it in scare quotes since he doesn't say lawyer here which is fine since he's a 5000 year old genie; but 99.9% the kids won't get it anyway. I sure don't. Gadget wants to ask the genie where Monty is. For once Gadget love; please let Monty die. He's sucking out your chance to be a star.
The Rangerplane follows the genie in through the alleyway as the genie blows off the entire world for being so ass backwards. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. And coming from a freaking genie no less has got to make PZ Meyers twitch in agony too. Or maybe not. So then the Rangers invokes the plunger grappling right on his forehead and then they tie him up and make him fall down hard on his back. Chip and Dale do their timber spot from the Donald Duck/Chip & Dale lumberjack short (how could I forget how Michael Eisner cut the finish out for House of Mouse) which sucks badly. The Rangerplane jumps down on the genie and the chipmunks jump down as well. The genie protests this outrage and I don't blame him. He gave Monty a deal and Monty was stupid enough to fall for the obvious consequences of the deal. Chip does the Gruffi pose while Dale does the Rebecca Cunningham pose as they demand what he did to Monty. The genie giggles badly as he explains that he's with the new genie and he doesn't know where the lamp really is even though he clearly saw where he threw the lamp away. Logic break #8 for the episode as we logically head off to.....
….Mr. Fat's Casino and Cat Food Canning Factory as we head inside the casino area as Mole of course is carrying the lamp by himself with Mepps and Wart in between them. That's the spirit Mole! Lend a bumping hand! Mepps and Mole get really giddy over the riches that they want so badly. Personally; I would like them to wish for Mepps whining to stop myself; but I don't see that happening anytime soon. They go into the golden elevator and go up to Mr. Fat's office as Wart asks what Mole wants out of the deal. Mole ponders that and he wants....a candy bar. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Now THAT'S the proper way to think way too small there my heelish bump machine. Mepps gleefully snickers on that one as Monty mopes around and blows them off for having the brains of a meat ax. Sorry Monty; but Don Karnage is cooler than you when it comes to blowing off his henchmen's brains. The henchmen then decide to screw Mr. Fat by wanting to rub the lamp and not let Mr. Fat know. Mole likes this because he'll get candy. Mole and Barlow; separated at birth. And then they start fighting over the lamp by tugging on it in a really funny spot. Seriously; why are Ranger fans surprised when Chris Barat proclaimed that Fat Cat was overused? And naturally; Monty barely bumps for the bumps. Man; A-1 sucks like crap....and I still like them over Kennedy Cartoons. I beginning to think there is a god, that Eisner is God and he has unadultered hate for me.
Sadly; Mr. Fat comes in from the elevator looking pissed off at his henchmen as he orders them to drop the lamp or they are fish bait. But not tickish fish bait. You need Kit Cloudkicker to fall into the harbor after hopping around getting his foot rubbed by Molly's thumbs. Mepps and Wart quickly go over to be the two most hilarious InAction Hero Lovers in history: Mr. And Mr. Suckup! AHHAHAHAHAHAHA! They of course blame the bump machine and I betcha Mole gets bumped off by Mr. Fat. I check the DVD....Damn; I'm good. See; funny verbal violence/sarcasm works wonders for the mind as Mole is screwed good. HAHA! Mole steps aside as Mr. Fat goes into his waiting for the longest of time to rub the lamp. Man; Mr. Fat needs a back rub and a foot rub to boot as he rubs the top of the lamp saying that he has history to make. Yeah; a history of bringing out the genie of “dragging down the episode” Monty. The pink smoke shoots from the spout and out pops Monty Genie who takes a MAN-SIZED bump on his ass on the floor. Monty gets up and brushes himself off because the lamp needs a tune up.
….and logically Mr. Fat goes berserk because it's a Rescue Ranger who happens to be the worst Rescue Ranger of them all. Boy; I think Mr. Fat sees the suck the writers don't see. Now THAT'S foresight! He could be Iwata's advisor. It sure beats a life of crime; that's for sure. Mr. Fat finds about 18 different ways to say that he is screwed badly. Come on Mr. Fat; don't be afraid to tell the world how you REALLY feel! And then he performs his first wish for something to flatten him and Monty grants the wish as the ANVIL OF NEIDHARTS comes down on Mr. Fat's head. OUCH! That's going to leave a mark. On the ANVIL OF NEIDHARTS. Mr. Fat is seeing blue birdies which is better animated than most of this episode actually. Mr. Fat is just plain knocked silly here as the henchmen are SHOCKED and APPALLED. Join the club guys. Mr. Fat recovers and realizes that he got his wish. Mepps asks if he is okay and Mr. Fat claps his hands and laughs.
Mr. Fat then explains the whole thing and he likes it because Monty is now Mr. Fat's bitch...ERRR... I mean slave. He even pokes Monty's belly hard just to amuse me. Monty blows him off but he's screwed so sod off you Aussie Stereotypical Genie! Mr. Fat waltzes around as he wants a place to hang his hat for his second wish and that logically cuts back to the alleyway on the sky shot as the genie is still tied up on the ground as Dale proclaims that the genie is holding out and Chip thinks he knows where the lamp is. And of course we see in the background; a huge tower being made into the sky in golden magic as we head inside as there is gold trim and gold statues everywhere along with a gold staircase and lots of golden fountains. Man; Mr. Fat is still thinking way too small here. And of course the fountains shoot red wine by cat tails. We cut to the treasure room which has about 1/7th the treasure Uncle Scrooge has. Mr. Fat calls this a living tribute to his greatness as he has dog servants and female cats fanning him and feeding him grapes on a golden throne with gems and plush pillows. That is good old Mr. Fat Cat in both canon and reality to boot. The henchmen enjoy their pillows as Mr. Fat asks his new bitch..ERRR..I mean slave on what part of the world he should dominate first. Monty blows him off because he still has to get past the Rescue Rangers and Mr. Fat gets giddy as he has a plan for them while twirling his evil mustache.
And so we logically return to the tied up genie and the other Rangers as the teleportation spell of doom beckons on the Rangers and they disappear. Genie whines about them being unable to get free. We then head to inside Mr. Fat's palace of heavens as the Rangers appear in front of the wine spewing fountain. The Rangers are confused to what is going on and then Mr. Fat's evil laugh forces them to turn around and they see Mr. Fat and Monty Genie together. I would proclaims that Monty has turned sad heel; but since he is a forced genie; this really doesn't count as a heel turn either. Mr. Fat orders Monty to turn the Rangers to dust via wishing and Monty groan as the spell job forces him to grant it....but the Rangers don't become dust..and Mr. Fat is PISSED off of this as he demands answers. Genie Monty proclaims that Mr. Fat ran out of wishes as he only got three.
I see; the teleportation spell was the third wish; so it fits perfectly within the context of DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!), and so Mr. Fat is screwed. He jumps into the lamp and hides as Mr. Fat gets bonked good by the fist of Monty and the lamp. Oy vey as Mr. Fat shakes and stirs the lamp; but no dice comes out of it. The Rangers try to get the lamp as they bail; but Mr. Fat grabs the bump machine and orders him to make the wish. Mole agrees if he gets what he wants and Mr. Fat yells at him to rub it. Well; I guess that is agreed upon in the heel crime world. Mole rubs the lamp and Monty Genie comes out to a good bump on the floor as Monty asks who is next and Mr. Fat orders Mole to wish the Ranger to their death. Memo to Mr. Fat: You can say death in a DTVA cartoon; just so you like to know. Mole wishes whatever Mr. Fat said after using the claw to make the point to save the candy bar until later. And Monty grants the wish as the Rangers blitz the stage and Mr. Fat waves goodbye. The Rangers disappear as Mr. Fat laughs it up badly to end the segment 17 and a half minutes in.
After the commercial break; we get a shot of Mr. Fat and the cronies laugh it up on the throne as a shadow of the slicer is in the scene which indicates the next death trap for the tied up Rangers to try to get themselves out of. I check the DVD...Damn; I'm good. Death trap of course: The pendulum slicer. Mr. Fat praises Mole's flair for the dramatic. I agree; this is just AWESOME of him. He actually created a death trap that is much more deadly and suspenseful than Mr. Fat could. Mr. Fat does the cut throat sign as A-1 just doesn't know how to keep the artwork from going too off model as the Rangers are about to go split. Cue bad laugh as the slicer is closing in on the ropes as we cut to Monty proclaiming that this is all his fault. Indeed so Aussie Stereotype and Mr. Fat is owning your ass as I want him to do. Mole has the lamp as Mole wants a can of soda; but Monty whispers into Mole's ear and tell him to set the Rangers free and Mole of course is REALLY STUPID that he listens to said whisper and wishes for the Rangers to be set free. Dammit! I just knew the Aussie Stereotype would ruin the fun somehow. And A-1 makes Mole look like a creepy pedophile. The golden slicer cuts away from the machine and then spins around and cuts the ropes to set the Rangers free, DUH! And the slicer misses Mr. Fat by about three inches as he is PISSED off and he grabs Mole by the shirt and I smell bump machine getting bump at six o'clock.
So the Rangers blitz the stage again and Mepps steals the lamp calling Mole a dummy. Mole grabs it because he wants his candy bar. HAHA! Mole has a two track mind: one for candy the other for bumping. AHHAHAHAHA! Mepps and Mole have a tug of war and Mepps wins; but takes a good bump off-screen and he gets knocked silly as Mr. Fat demands that the Rangers be destroyed. Monty whispers in Mepps' ear to wish for Ranger toys and naturally that is what Mepps wishes for. Well; he was knocked silly, so it's understandable. And naturally the Rangers bail because it's raining Ranger toys; just to piss off Mr. Fat even more. It's only fun until the Aussie Stereotype ruins it for everyone. At least the toys are absolutely fake because god only knows if the FCC gets bitchy about that toy commercial rule. Nice bump off the throne and onto the ground from Mr. Fat as Wart sees a toy Ranger Jack In the Box and it shows Zipper. Huh? Shouldn't the joke use Monty since his last name is Jack? Logic break #8 for the episode as Wart gets knocked silly. Let me guess; he gets the lamp next and he wishes for something Monty whispers into his ear. I check the DVD....
Not quite as we see Gadget control a robot tank version of herself complete with plungers. BS&P RULEZ! And A-1 makes Gadget look like a toothless hick. What is going on with the off-model animation A-1? Zipper toots his mouth and the plungers fire creating a frame of Mr. Fat. DAMMIT BS&P! It's a bunch of freakin plungers!! Surely; one of them can make contact with Mr. Fat. And of course it's the Big Bertha Plunger as Mr. Fat tells Mepps to make a wish but the plunger shuts him up. Mepps recovers as the knock silly has made the whites of his eyes turn green (WHAT THE HELL IS A-1 SMOKING?) and Monty MURDERS Mepps with the ZIPPER SLEDGEHAMMER OF PLOT (oh goody! NOT!) to knock him silly again. Monty then whispers in his ear that Mr. Fat wants some fish and naturally that is what Mepps wishes for. Again; the psychology makes perfect sense; but it's Monty so screw the psychology! Please end this episode now; the joke is dying beyond the pale and it's time to mercy kill it. Mr. Fat doesn't like this one bit as everyone is screwed as the WAVE OF FISH comes up and Monty proclaims that he overdid it a bit. How? There is only about 5 fish in the entire sequence max; the rest was ocean water. Bad form there Eric Lewald and A-1.
Monty dives into the lamp as the Ranger swim around in the lake room only about 1/100 full of fish. Gadget gets on a Zipper inflatable raft (talk about writing Zipper's sex life in one neat little package) and Zipper opens the cork which causes the raft to thrust forward. Chip and Dale get onto the raft as they blitz towards the lamp and Mr. Fat treads water in a panic. For once I agree with Mr. Fat: Don't let them get the lamp and let Monty continue sucking. Mepps and Wart have a race to the lamp as Monty turns sea sick. Sadly; sea sickness is not fatal or I would be happy as a little girl. Mepps thinks he has the lamp first; but the fish balances it on his nose and flings it into the air. I just knew the fish would get involve in the finish somehow. The fish whacks the lamp with it's tail and the chipmunk jump up from the raft and use their hard heads to knock the lamp down to the ocean floor below with sick bumps and then plop into the water beside it. OUCH! Chip and Dale get onto the lamp and rub it to piss Monty out of it. And Monty acts like an asshole when he comes out. Some things never change as Mr. Fat is riding on a fish and I think you can safely say Mr. Fat's career as a serious monster heel is officially over. Seriously Eric; didn't you learn ANYTHING from Just A Tad Smarter? The heels surround and swim towards the lamp as Gadget wonders what wish to make as we have about a minute left in the episode. Monty doesn't care what; he wishes this episode never happened. When Monty is the one getting the picture; you know this...well you know. Chip and Dale get the LIGHTBULB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY and they rub the lamp and wish that this never happened. The wish is granted and we get some magic effects and then we fade to black....
….and REPEAT THE ENTIRE SEQUENCE from the start of the episode. What is this; Manos and Night of Horror done by a halfway writer? Oh man; that is such a cop out finish that it's not even funny. The only difference; the pelican goes to sleep on the perch due to the PIXIE DUST OF SATAN; but the Fry Clone still gets busted anyway. Well; at least the sequence was done more professionally so I'll live...maybe...maybe not. We return to DA...HOLE of the cheese factory as Zipper and Monty (with empty sack) exchange notes on being happy to have his friends back which shows just how dense and how unbelievable this series really is in hindsight. They enter the factory through DA...HOLE (god bless Baby Plucky) as the pixie dust return on said hole and that mercifully ends the episode at 21:13. Worst Mr. Fat episode ever and of course it was Monty screwing him up as usual. The Monty being made into Mr. Fat's slave was pretty entertaining though so it wasn't close to a DUD; but man A-1 and Eric ruin Mr. Fat's heat once Monty got into the goon's ear and then Mr. Fat rode on a fish. Call it ** (40%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Well folks; Monty has done it again and he really got on my nerves in this one. Let's see; we get a half hearted attempt at the genie wish plot line which I seen a million times before and sprinkle in Monty being a jerk that looked really contrived and forced because it was so sudden. Then we had the old switch spot again which at least made better sense than Dale's version in The Last Lucky Charms Whatever. Oh; and the genie sucks and once the Rangers get teleported; he's written out completely. Which is fine compared to when Julia Jane Lewald wrote Kit out in Feminine Air. The middle was actually the best part of the episode when the heels got the lamp and used Monty as their slave; if only because I hate Monty so much now that it wasn't funny. In fact; Mole looked great for one scene when he did an awesome death trap. But then Monty had to take over to protect his super mouse image and basically turned Mr. Fat into a pussy riding on a fish. And then we get the cop out finish of having everything reset back to the start of the episode in Night of Horror fashion; only slightly more tolerable. Which is really bad I might add. Add on eight logic breaks and A-1 having no clue how to keep on task with the artwork. I'm all for off-model moments; but none of them were entertaining and look like defects than funny spots. The amazing part is: I rather have A-1 animate Darkwing Duck over Kennedy Cartoons at this point. I wonder who Mr. Kennedy blew to get the contract for Darkwing Duck. If the middle wasn't so good; this episode would probably be a DUD bordering on negative stars. I have new respect for Cathryn Perdue and Destiny Rides Again; racist Mexican Stereotype aside. And the worst part is; Monty has another focus episode coming up. Thankfully; it's Battle of the Bulge which should actually be interesting on a sadist level. So......
Thumbs down for this episode and I'll see you next time.