Announcer: What are these cartoon characters running from? They're not...they are running too...the world greatest competition in town. Tonight; it's the first semi-final of the Disney Television Animation Cup as the characters from Gargoyles take on the characters from TaleSpin. It's the classic battle of the stone warriors vs. the metal warrior...and now here's two guys who should be shot; Kenny Blankenship and Vic Ramano.

[We head into the studio.]

Vic: Welcome to the show...we have a mono-a-mono showdown.

Ken: The TaleSpin team Vs. the Gargoyles team...and I have a date with destiny.

Vic: How so Ken?

Ken: I'm trying to date that hot gargoyle chick Demona.

Vic: Oh; I would love to see that Kenny...<but sadly; she thinks that human beings are bad.>

Ken: What?!

Vic: <We are weak.>

Ken: What?!

Vic: [Hits Kenny with his fan.] WE'RE EVIL!!

Ken: Cool! Just like in sunday school!

[We go to the field with Guy LaDouce.]

Guy: I love evil; particually when it involves two consenting adults and a video camera...HOHOHOHO! But I digress as begin this semi-final with such wacky event such as Eat Shi-take!, then we proceed with the trilling Dash To Death, followed by the exciting Pole Riders and then we end it with my favorite event...RUNAWAY STUMP! The winner of this event will go to the Disney Television Animation Cup Final....now since I have a weak; I need to take a bathroom break so let's go to Captain Tameal.

[We go into the forest with Captain Tameal and the two teams competing.]

Captain: Thanks Guy...How many of you think that the episode Deadly Force is a good way to educate children on gun violence and thus should be shown on network television during the family hour? Show of hands right now.

All: YEAH! [They raise their hands.]

{TaleSpin Team: Kit Cloudkicker (Captain), Baloo, Louie Lamount, Rebecca Cunningham, Kathy Dodd, Ernie, Oscar Vandersnoot, Gibber, Hacksaw, Detective Thursday, Shere Khan, Aunt Louise, Dr. Debolt, Frank WildCat, Ace London.}

{Gargoyles Team: Goliath (Captain), David Xanatos, Demona, Angella, Magus, Boardway, Brooklyn, Elisa, Owen, Archmage, Puck, Coldstone, MacBeth, Lexington.}

Captain: Well; that is a load of crud. That episode is the reason why lawsuits are filed againest media..and parent are dumb anyway...cause I'm the Captain. So; David is there anything to say?!

David: .....

Owen: I'm sorry Captain...but Mr. Xanatos is currently being sued for creating a defective video game because it made a kid fat..and cannot speak directly to anyone.

Captain: See; there's a moral to this story...Video games do not made kids fat and violent; lawyers and Swedish sciencists do. I should know; my eight year old son saw the research material from them and he was so angry that he started stabbing schoolmates and gained ten pounds each time he stabbed one...he had to be popped to stop the carnage.

Kit: That really didn't happen....didn't it?

Captain: [Goes into position] No it didn't....I wouldn't let my son play games...I'm the Captain...LET'S GO!

[Everyone stands up and they run with the Captain towards the first event.]

Vic: ....and we begin with our first event: Eat Shi-Take! This game combines the light-hearted druid game of fungus flying with the horrible thought of drowning in our mystery fulid...Tell us what today's secret fulid is Ken...

Ken: That's runoff from the toliet of Jim Cummings.

Vic: Good stuff there Ken.

Eat Shi-Take!: The contestent starts on a platform about ten feet above a large pond. There is a small platform on the other side surrounded by the pond about 30 feet away. A pully system connect from pond edge to pond edge. A large plastic model in the shape of a mushroom with grip handles is connected to the pully. The contestent much grab onto the mushroom and twirl around on it until it reaches the other platform. If the contestent manages to stay on the platform for three seconds; it is a win. You lose if you fall into the water before three seconds or before landing on the platform.

Captain: GET IT ON!

Vic: First up for team TaleSpin...

Louie: Get my crazy aunt away from me!

Vic: Here's Louie Lamount...he is the resturant owner on a tropical island.

Ken: Looks like Aunt Louise is off the meds again.

Vic: Indeed...[Louie grabs onto the mushroom and spins around on it towards the platform slowly.]

Ken: This is a blistering run Vic...I don't know if he can keep this up...

Vic: Right you are Ken. [The shroom get about 40% of the way; but Louie loses his grip and he falls into the fulid.] Well; Louie is about to face her aunt again...

Ken: As a loser....

Vic: Let's go to the replay. [They show the replay.]

Ken: Speed is important because slow and steady will just merely floss the shroom of doom.

Vic: Right you are Ken!. [Back to the action]..And first up to the plate for Gargoyles....

Archmage: I'll kill those Gargoyles yet!

Vic: This is the Archmage...he is the evil sage who wanted to kill Goliath...[Archmage tries to use his teleport to cheat.]

Ken: Hey; he's cheating!

Vic: Not to worry Ken....[Archmage appears right in the middle of the pond without anything to support him and he falls into the fuild.] Cheaters don't prosper on MXC....

Ken: [They show the replay.] How did you do that?!

Vic: Like I said Ken....Cheater don't prosper on MXC...when they are facing an anti-teleportation device...[Back to the action.]

Kathy: Bells rock!! Gargoyles suck!

Vic: Here's Kathy Dodd...she is the archologist who found the lost city of Tinabula. [Kathy grabs onto the mushroom.] You know Ken; researching the history of a lost city can be a great way to get your inner smarts.

Ken: [Kathy twirls around on the shroom.] Also a good way to get killed by a weapon collector who wants to rule the world.

Vic: It all comes with the job Ken. [Kathy's grip slips about 40% of the way and falls into the fuild.] Sadly; her sense of history didn't help her there.

Ken: Nor her body...since you love boobs Vic!

Vic: That's why I have you Kenny! Next up for Gargoyles....

Elisa: Police officers don't kill people....

Vic:....is Elisa. She is a detective who found out about the gargoyles who were on the watch tower in New York City. [Elisa gets onto the shrooms twirls around towards the platform.]

Ken: She's my hero Vic...I should write a love letter for her and give her chocolates. [Elisa makes it to the other side and tries to land on the small floating platform; but she lands too hard and bounces off the pad into the fuild.]

Vic: Oh and her position didn't help her there...Let's go to Guy and find out what happened.

[We go to the the field with Guy Ladouce looking animated and Elisa.]

Guy: You almost made it....what happened out there?

Elisa: Well; I thought that I landed properly; but I really landed on my mommyberries....

Guy: You landed on your mommyberries....would you let Doctor Guy check on them?

Elisa: If you do that......I'll have to arrest you!

Guy: [Gets closer to Elisa] Guy would love to be arrested!

Elisa: [Go around to Guy's back and puts the steel handcuffs on Guy's wrists] I arrest you for being obscene!

Guy: OOOO...Guy like being obscene too......HOHOHOHOHOHAHAHOHAHO! [Back to the action.]

Vic: Top notch reporting as usual Guy! Next up for TaleSpin is Ernie...

Ernie: BULLETHEAD!

Vic: He is the co-leader of the Jungle Aces Secret Midnight Club. [Ernie jumps onto the mushroom as twirls around so violently and he falls into the fuild before the mushroom has a chance to go down the pully.] Oh!

Ken: That's the first time I've had to say that he tired way too hard.

Vic: Right you are Ken...and that's what happens when you are drunk with power....

Ken: Huh?

Vic: Back to the action.....

Goliath: I shall fight with honor!

Vic: Here's the leader of the clan of Gargoyles; Goliath.

Ken: [Goliath gets onto the mushroom and starts to twirl around towards the platform.] Some leader he is...he couldn't save his clan a thousand years ago and now he has to live in shame as an outcast...

Vic: I guess that's why humans are evil right?

Ken: What was that?

Vic: Nothing Ken. [The mushroom makes it to the platform and Goliath get off. But he misses the platform and falls into the fuild with his back to the platform and his bat wings rub againest the platform and they break and clip.] Oh my....!

Ken: He got clipped...! and that calls for a MXC Impact Replay. [They go to the replay.]

Vic: Golaith looked great right until....there...and sadly we see something that no one wants to see as Goliath's wings are completely separated and clipped from the bone...and being held on by the tiny threads of muscle and flesh....and next up for TaleSpin....

Khan: I shall own this show.

Vic: This is Shere Khan...He is the owner of his own corperate empire Khan Industries; located on 666 Devilview Street....[ Khan grabs onto the mushroom.]

Ken: Hey; he said that this show is his for the taking...[The mushroom twirls around towards the platform.]

Vic: Actually Kenny...in order for Khan to compete in this competition; we had to sweeten the pot. If Team TaleSpin wins the competition today; Shere Khan gets the best show on earth MXC.

Ken: No way....[The mushroom makes it to the platform. Khan does a half-twist and lets go. He makes it onto the platform and sticks it for the point.]

Vic: It may very well be _way_...because Shere Khan has made it. He has done it....and that puts Team TaleSpin on the board. Can the Gargoyles team catch up?!

Magus: Fire Storm! [Magus lights up a fireball from his hands and it unintentionally fires from his hands; missing the Captain by inches.]

Captain: Hey; watch it with that thing.

Magus: Sorry about that.

Vic: This is Magus; he is a mage in training...

Ken: [Magus grabs onto the mushroom and twirls toward the platform.] I guess he still needs work.

Vic: Right you are Ken....[Magus loses his grip and falls into the fuild about 60% of the way to the platform.] Oh! And he get a Sludge Storm...[They show the replay.]

Ken: Magus almost gave the Captain a burning facial and ends up with a full man-pudding facial.

Vic: Right you are Ken...and thanks to the corperate greed antics of Mr. Khan; the TaleSpin Team leads it 1-0.

Ken: Greed is great!

Vic: Indeed!

Announcer: Coming up next....it's time to get Dashed To Death! Hey; don't touch the clicker, ButtClown!

[Commerical Break.]

Announcer: ..And we are back with the humans vs. the furries.

[Back in the studio.]

Vic: And we're back as the TaleSpin team leads the Gargoyles team 1-0...You know Ken; I have one question to ask you... How can you be so calm?

Ken: It's a Blankenship trait Vic...you of all people should know that.

Vic: [Hits Kenny with his fan.] So you're blaming God for asking Demona to dance with you topless?!

Ken: Why not?! We've blamed everything else....

Vic: Oh...and I thought Dr. Laura was hypocritical and evil...

Ken: Nope....just evil.....

Vic: Our next event is Dashed to Death. The object is to get to the finish line without getting DASHED TO DEATH!!

Dashed To Death - This is an obstacle course with a water pit surrounded on all sides. It starts with running on a treadmill-like floor being chased by three black cloaked demons. Near the end of the treadmill; there's a large foam rock thrown at the contesent. The person must dodge this or the person might fall into the pit called The Meat Grinder which has a bicycle wheel type spokes. There is a small gap to follow with a trampoline. You jump on that and land onto a box of sponges. They get out of that and walk onto a narrow platform and they slowly walk on that while dodge a pandeilum looking like an angry dragon. This leads up to a turn-table device which they stand on and go to the other side. They go into another batch of sponges and then another narrow platform which is much longer and there are three paper-mache pandileums to dodge. The last bit of the course is to swing across the pond onto a floating platform and then climb up onto a stable platform for the win. You lose if you fall into the pond; or fall into the Meat Grinder.

Captain: GET IT ON!

Vic: ....and first up for Gargoyles..

Owen: David is not evil....just misunderstood.

Vic: This is Owen....he is the aide to David Xanatos and his lawyer...which the Captain was talking to earlier.

Ken: Hey; I thought Owen was really Puck...

Vic: I'm going to have to check that again Ken... [Owen runs onto the tredmill and barely misses the stone by three inches. Owen then jumps onto the side of the Meat Grinder and dodges it.]

Ken: Owen's putting on a clinic... [Owen jump onto the trampoline.] He hits the Ejacolator...[Owen overshoots the jump as he goes too high to the left and fall into the fuild.]

Vic: Oh; and Owen has lost this case....Tell us what the flavour de jour is the sludge.....

Ken: [They show the replay.] That's man pudding from the people who work for Disney Television Animation Division. [Back to the action.]

Aunt Louise: Watch me Louie-dearest!

Vic: Here's Aunt Louise...you may remember her from the last event.

Ken: I was wrong...she's back on the meds.

Vic: Right you are Ken! [Aunt Louise starts on the tredmill. However; she gets nailed on the head with the Brain Scrambler and falls right into the Meat Grinder.] Oh dear!

Ken: How do you love ape-susages?!

Vic: Very tasty Ken...as we go to the MXC Impact Replay...[They go to the replay.]

Ken: This proves only one thing....Meds can be deadly!

Vic: Right you are Ken....and let's go to Guy and Louie....[We go to the field with Guy LaDouce standing by with Louie who appears to be crying.]

Guy: I'm here with Louie....Are you all right?

Louie: [sniff] I lost my aunt to your crazy, sick stunts!! I should sue them for wrongful death.

Guy: You know....I'm sorry...I mean you and your aunt did sign waiver meaning that you cannot sue us...I'm terribly sorry. Sometimes we do events that can kill people if they aren't careful...I'll leave you to respect your privacy if you want...

Louie: You go do that you twisted, sick perverted man....[Guy exits to leave Louie alone.] Good...I'll never have her harassing me ever....

Louise: Oh Louie?!

Louie: Oh crud...!

Guy: OOOOO.....Guy like! [Back to the action.]

Vic: Top notch reporting as always Guy. Next up for Gargoyles....

Demona: I'll kill you Captain Crunch!!

Vic: Here's Demona....She was the gargoyle who is connected with a human because of her hatered of humans..

Ken: I guess you would hate humans too if you're related to a psychopath....

Vic: Indeed....[Demona runs onto the treadmill and avoids the Brain Scrambler easily.] Good start here as she avoids the Brain Scrambler and shes dodges the Meat Grinder with ease.

Ken: The key to victory is to avoid the sludge pits...[Demona jumps onto the Ejacolator and lands into the Contespective Sponges.]

Vic: She punces into the Ejacolator...and into the sponges.

Ken: [Gets onto the narrow platform.] Watch out for the Angry Dragon. [Demona punches the Angry Dragon and gets onto the Spinner.] She is putting on a laser clinic.

Vic: Indeed...as she lands on the sponges.. [Demona gets onto the next platform.]

Ken: Here comes the Nards of Doom. [Demona dodges the three Nards and makes it to the swinging area.] She could go all the way....Instant date!

Vic: [Demona swings and lands perfectly on the floating platform and gets onto the solid platform for the point.] I didn't know about _instant_....but Demona has made it....She's done it! The score is tied 1-1. Can Team TaleSpin retake the lead?

Baloo: Can I take the day off Beckey?

Rebecca: No you cannot buster!

Baloo: Oh shoot!

Vic: This is Baloo....he is the legendary pilot of Higher For Hire.

Ken: I don't like this....[Baloo gets onto the treadmill and tries to get to the other side; but he falls flat on his face and falls back. He misses the Brain Scrambler though.] See what I mean Vic?

Vic: That was actually a good stragedy...he didn't go into the Meat Grinder.

Ken: Oh...[Baloo manages to get up and get onto the side of the Meat Grinder. He manages to barely dodges the Meat Grinder Spokes and heads for the Ejacolator.] Here we come...[Baloo jumps onto the Ejacolator; but he messes up and bounces back into the fuild.] Oh; he killed it....

Vic: He certainly did Ken....and that will notch another bill on the tab of Higher For Hire...and next up for Gargoyles.

MacBeth: I swear on my bloody honour!

Vic: This is MacBeth...he came from the past to kill Demona for slaughtering his clan.

Ken: That would be cool to actually live in the past....

Vic: I don't think so Ken...[MacBeth starts on the tredmill and gets nailed by the Brain Scrambler; but he just keeps on going.]

Ken: Wow....the Brain Scrambler had no effect on him...[MacBeth dodges the Meat Grinder and jumps off the Ejacolator and lands succesfully into the batch of sponges.] Man; he murders the Ejacolator.

Vic: Indeed...[MacBeth gets onto the platform and the Angry Dragon comes towards him. He manages to barely dodge it.]

Ken: Just got past the Angry Dragon...[MacBeth gets onto the spinner and makes it to the next batches of sponge.] He's also putting on a clinic...

Vic: Well that's easy for him when you have to chase a gargoyle...[He gets onto the larger ridge with the Nards of Doom.]

Ken: Here comes the Nards of Doom! [Macbeth dodges them easily and makes it to the swing.] He could go all the way... [MacBeth swings; however, his hand slips and he falls into the fuild.] Well; that's why Demona always escapes.

Vic: Right you are Ken....and next up for TaleSpin....

Oscar: This will be automatic!

Vic: This is Oscar Vandersnoot; who is the boy who finally got an adventure.

Ken: This will be automatic indeed...[Oscar gets onto the tredmill and attempts to run. However; Oscar falls on his face and lands right into the fuild on the left side as Kenny laughs out loud.] Automatic Loser...HEE...HEE....HEE... HEE!

Vic: You're a mean man Kenny!

Ken: I know..

Vic: Oh crud....Last up for Team Gargoyles...David Xanatos who refused to speak to anyone earlier to the Captain due to the pending lawsuit...[David gets onto the tredmill and dodges the Brain Scrambler. David gets onto the side of the Meat Grinder and dodges it easily. David jumps onto the Ejacolator and lands onto the sponges.]

Ken: He hits the Ejacolator. [David gets out and gets onto the narrow platform.] Here comes the Angry Dragon. [The Angry Dragon nails David; which makes him loses his balance and he falls into the fuild.]

David: Ouch! Oh swell.....!

Ken: So much for keeping silent...

Vic: Last up for TaleSpin...

Kit: [Giggling] YAHOO!! BALOO!!!

Vic: This is Kit Cloudkicker; the navigator for Higher For Hire.

Ken: I love this kid...He has yet to be painfully eliminated....and since he used to be an Air Pirate; this should be easy....

Vic: Indeed....[Kit starts on the tredmill and dodges the Brain Scrambler easily. He easily pasts the Meat Grinder and jumps into the Ejacolator.]

Ken: Good push into the Ejacolator. [Kit lands in the sponges...He goes onto the narrow ledge and avoids the Angry Dragon without any trouble.] He passes the Angry Dragon. [Kit jumps across the ledge and the jump is so high that he lands onto the other batch of sponges.] Man; he cleared the Spinner completely. 

Vic: That comes from years of skysurfing Kenny. [Kit gets onto the platform and dodges the Nards of Doom.]

Ken: He dodges the Nards of Doom. This separates the winner boys from the sinner boys.

Vic: Right you are Ken! [Kit takes the swing and swings across. He lands right on the solid platform perfectly and does a celebration for the point.]...and he has done it!

Ken: That was a record run...as only he can do.

Vic: Right you are Ken...and Kit The Miracle Worker has preformed another miracle and keep Team TaleSpin in the lead...but thanks to Demona; the human hating sadist...the Gargoyles team keeps pace and TaleSpin leads 2-1.

Ken: Khan is laughing at us.

Vic: Indeed!

Announcer: Coming up next...It's time to take the shaft....Smoke that in you pipe Jacknight!!

[Commerical Break]

Announcer: ...and we are back with New York's finest taking on Cape Suzette's wackiest....

[Back in the studio with Ken and Vic.]

Vic: We're back in the epic saga as Team TaleSpin leading Team Gargoyles by a score of 2-1...and Kenny; I want to ask you for your thoughts about the possiability of Mr. Khan taking over our show.

Ken: I hate it Vic! Mr. Khan will fire you because you don't fit on his demographic and our show will be censored.

Vic: I know Ken...Maybe that will make you conform to the decenecy of the FCC standards you little monkey! [Vic hits Kenny with his fan.]

Ken; [Laughing] You cannot fool me Vic..We are on cable television so Mikey Powell cannot touch us...HEE...HEE...HEE!

Vic: Not if Mr. Khan has anything to say about it....Next event is Pole Riders. The object here is to ride the shaft onto the platform without getting wet into today's mystery fuild.

Ken: Today's fuild is runoff from the manison of Michael Eisner..

Vic: All the more reason to get onto the platform.

Pole Riders - In the middle of the pond there is a floatable green platform. On the right side of the pond; there is a taller green platform. The contesent starts there and takes a 15 foot steel pole and they stick it into the pond and ride it so they land on the floating green platform for three seconds for the win. You lose if you fall into the water; or fall off the platform before three seconds.

Captain: GET IT ON!

Vic: First up for TaleSpin....

Hacksaw: This event is taking on water!

Vic: This is Hacksaw..He is the demolision expert for the Air Pirates.....[Hacksaw runs with the pole, sticks it into the water and tries to ride pole. However; he bends the shaft too hard and it flicks back into Hacksaw's face causing Hacksaw to go violently into the fuild.] Oh!...and the shaft got mad. Let's show that on the replay.

Ken: [They show the replay.] In this game you cannot take a flick or else you will get it in the eye...Nothing worse than being a stereotypical pirate.

Vic: Right you are Ken....[Back to the action.] Next up for Team Gargoyles....

Angella: This is for you Vic Ramano!

Vic: Here is Angella...she is apparently a close friend of Goliath...

Ken: Goliath is going to be jealous...since she _loves_ _you_....HEE...HEE...HEE!

Vic: Stop it Kenny!! [Angella sticks her pole into the water and tries to ride pole. She manages to get to the platform; but she hits the platform too hard and falls into the fuild.] Well; that run was kind of sick...Next up for Team TaleSpin.

Dr. Debolt: Please listen to me....

Vic: Here's Dr. Debolt...He is the main sciencist for Khan Enterprises.

Ken: This will be fun...[Debolt sticks the pole into the water and rides pole. However; he slides down the pole and falls into the fuild.] Fun _LOSER_!!

Vic: Of course Kenny...Insightful as always. Next up for Gargoyles....

Puck: Want to play?!

Vic: Here's Puck....the joker mage who lived in the Middle Ages.

Ken: He's already playing a trick on me....I thought that he was Owen...

Vic: I think that's another union Ken. [Puck sticks the pole into the water and tries to ride pole. However; he nails the fuild hard and the back of his head hits the side of the floating platform.] Oh goodness!

Ken: And that's our MXC Impact Replay...[They go to the replay.]

Vic: Puck gets off to a good start....good position.....good timing...

Ken: And here's the problem Vic. He didn't land on the platform.

Vic: You are insightful as always Ken.

Ken: Thank you! [Back to the action.]

Thursday: I'm going to arrest you!

Vic: Here's Detective Thursday....He's the lead detective for the Cape Suzette Police Force.

Ken: He's actually trying to pass a law to fine civial servents $500 per offense everything they spell a word wrong.

Vic: Right you are Ken...and it's about time too....[Thursday sticks the pole into the water and tries to ride pole. However; he springs the pole shaft too hard and it springs back; causing Thursday to bounce right into the fuild.] Oh!

Ken: That looked like a flick...

Vic: Wonders never fail to amuse me....and next up....

Goliath: I shall redeem thyself!

Vic: Well; here is Goliath...you may remember that in Eat Shi-take! that he got his wings clipped and you can see the bandages there....can he redeem himself? [Goliath sticks the pole into the water and rides pole perfectly and lands right onto the platform and sticks it for the point.] He sticks it! He has redeemed himself nicely and Team Gargoyle ties it up at two.

Rebecca: Business sense is common sense!

Vic: Here's Rebecca Cunningham; she is currently the owner of Higher For Hire and Baloo's SeaDuck.

Ken: She was laying down the law on her pilot.

Vic: Right you are Ken....[Rebecca sticks the pole into the water and rides pole perfectly and sticks the landing onto the floating green platform for the point.]...and Rebecca's business sense pays off! Just when Gargoyles get the tie; TaleSpin retakes the lead.

Ken: That's how you win dates Vic...Always retake the lead.

Ken: Insightful as always Ken....Last up for Gargoyles....

Broadway: I'm sorry Elisa!!

Vic: Here is the loable green gargoyle Broadway. He was the one who unintentionally shot Elisa in the episode Deadly Force; the one the Captain was talking about. [Broadway sticks the pole in the water and tries to ride pole. He manages to land on the platform but he literally bounces off the platform and falls into the fuild.] Oh!

Ken: He looked like a Gummi Bear right there..

Vic: Right you are Ken....So thanks to the redeeming honour of Goliath; Team Gargoyles manages to keep it close. But Rebecca's full of meddle has kept the TaleSpin team in the lead 3-2.

Announcer: Coming up next...it's the finalt event of the evening. Hey; try this on your next dance number Bonehitch!!

[Commerical Break...]

Announcer: And now we return with the grand finale of flying madness.

[Back in the studio.]

Vic: And we are back to our show with Team TaleSpin leading 3-2. Our event is next and that's worth two points....Now Kenny! [Hits him with his fan.]....Look professional! This could be the last episode of MXC on Spike TV.

Ken: The First Network For Men! You know...I've been thinking....

Vic: Kenny; I'm going to stop you right there because I know where this is going...You're going to say: 'Hey Vic! Why don't you get into the animation business?' and I'm going to say: 'Well Kenny; I've working on a project for the Disney Studios called Dave The Barbarian' and then you're going to laugh out loud and make fun of me; telling me that the cartoon sucks and I'm going to be so angry!!!...THERE'S ONE THING YOU'LL NEVER HAVE AND THAT IS FEELINGS!! SO YOU CAN JUST FORGET ABOUT IT BECAUSE IT'S NOT GOING TO WORK!!!

Ken: Man; I was only asking you why Spike TV is called a network when it's a cable channel...

Vic: All right...Let's go to our last event: Runaway Stump. The concept of this event is based on the creators of Riverdance where the dancers would roll on the logs in order to learn the diffcult dance steps. We added one new feature to this event which is our mystery fuild. Tell us what our mystery fuild is for today Ken?

Ken: That's sweat from the Disney sweatshops in Hong Kong and China...

Runaway Stump - A large log is placed on top of a secured rail system; eight feet above a pond. The contestent rolls the log from the right platform towards the left platform. About halfway; the rail slopes down so the log rolls down faster. You win if you make it onto the left platform. You lose if you fall into the pond below. All contestent start on the log when filmed by the way.

Captain: LET'S GET IT ON!

Vic: First up for Team Gargoyles...

Brooklyn: This is rad!

Vic: Here is Brooklyn...the small yellow gargoyle who looks like a bat.

Ken: [Brooklyn rolls the log slowly across the rails and manages to rool onto the downward slope. However; the log rolls too fast and Brooklyn slips up causing him to fall into the fuild.] Well; he got smacked out of the ballpark.

Vic: Right you are Ken...and first up for Team TaleSpin.....

Gibber: Pst....Pst....Pst....

Vic: Here is Gibber....He is the silent one of the Air Pirate and he usually wispers into Don Karnage's ear to inform him of mishaps.

Ken: Man; considering Don's record for slapping subordinates without as much as a thought; I'm surprised that he is still breathing.

Vic: Right you are Ken. [Gibber rolls the log slowly on the rails. However; his boot unintentionally slips and he nails his jaw on the log before falling into the fuild.] Oh!

Ken: And that calls for an MXC Impact Replay...[They show the replay.] The best thing about this is that Don won't have to slap him around anytime soon...but Gibber going to have to get a jaw replacement.

Vic: Right are you Ken...[Back to the action]. Next up for Team Gargoyles....

Lexington: I'm going all the way!!

Vic: Here is Lexington...the red gargoyle of the clan.

Ken: These Gargoyles should win this event Vic.

Vic: Umm Kenny....you're supposed to be professional and impartial. [Lex slowly rolls the logs across the rails.]

Ken: I am Vic...the gargoyles have talons so it should help.

Vic: Good eye Ken....[Lex starts to roll down the slope; but he rolls too fast and back flops into the fuild.] Well; his talon didn't help him there....Next up for Team TaleSpin.

Ace London: You got that right!

Vic: Here is Ace London...he is the cocky pilot who loves to put Baloo behind the eight-ball.

Ken: I am the best, I'm quick as a cat.....I know I'm not Baloo; since he's grey and fat!

Vic: Good reciting there Ken....[ Ace London slowly rolls the log across the rail and manages to get down the slope. However; the log goes too fast for London and he attempts to roll in the other direction which forces his body forward and he falls into the fuild.] Well; I can hear Baloo laughing now...Let's go to the replay..

Ken: [They show the replay.] See...here's the problem Vic...He reverse his field...and when you do that you reverse your chances of winning from 100% to zero.

Vic: Right you are Ken...Insightful as always. [Back to the action.]

Coldstone: Now die!

Vic: Here is the metal gargoyle ColdStone....let's see if his programming can help Team Gargoyles win two points here.... [Coldstone rolls the log across the rails.] He's looking good here...[Coldstone rolls the log down the slope; however it goes too fast and Colstone falls into the fuild.] Oh!

Ken: That mad pudding will fry those modern circuits.

Vic: Right you are Ken...Good call...Next up for TaleSpin....

WildCat: This is my watch....and I am slow!

Vic: Here is Frank WildCat; he is the mechanic for Higher For Hire.

Ken: Higher as in up...and Hire as in for money.

Vic: Right you are Ken....always reminds me of you and Guy...

Ken: Huh? [WildCat rolls the log across the rails; but he loses his balance and falls into the fuild.]

Vic: Never mind Ken....and that run was pretty sick...Last up for Team Gargoyles is Demona. [They show the replay of her run from Dash To Death.] You may remember her brilliant run from Dash to Death. Can she do it again? [Back to the action.]

Ken: If she doesn't make it then TaleSpin wins....

Vic: ...and you know what that means...[Demona rolls the log across the ralls and down the slope.] Wait a minute...this may not be over yet. [Demona leaps off the log and lands on the platform perfectly.] Because she has done it...and Gargoyles take it's first lead 4-3....and now it is up to our last competitor....

Kit: YAHOO!!

Ken: Oh my God no....NOT HIM!!

Vic: Here's Kit Cloudkicker...and he had a great run as Dashed to Death....can he do it?! [Kit rolls the log across the rails.]

Ken: Please get eliminated! Please get eliminated! [Kit rides the log down the slope perfectly until he's close enough to jump.]

Vic: Well; you're prayers will not be answered...[Kit jumps off the log and lands on the platform. He stumbles a little bit; but sticks it for three seconds for the TaleSpin win.] because the miracle worker has won it for TaleSpin....and thanks to him; despite the effort of the sadist Demona...the TaleSpin Team wins it 5-4. 

[Back to the studio]

Ken: Well Vic; I guess that this is it. Shere Khan now officially owns MXC and we have to conform to...[Vic starts to laugh out loud.] What's so funny?!

Vic: You are the ultimate in being gulliable you little monkey...[Hits Kenny with his fan.] Shere Khan is not moving MXC off of Spike TV...So there will be no censorship Ken.

Ken: I thought that Shere Khan owns MXC now.

Vic: Shere Khan does in fact own the rights to Most Extreme Elimination Challenge...outside of planet. Everyone knows that Earthia exists and that's where the TaleSpin team actually comes from.

Ken: Why would Mr. Khan want MXC? There is no television on Earthia.

Vic: There will be once Dr. Zvaldo finishes his 'Radio With Pictures'....besides Khan must find a fresh tv show since Michael Esiner refuses to renew TaleSpin...the best show not being renewed...Well; Ken; that ends another great competition as TaleSpin moves on the Disney Television Animation Cartoon Cup Final.

Ken: Yeap; I just hope that Angella don't feel rejected since a date with Demona makes me a happy Kenny.

Vic: But before you do that; you have to do the most important thing Ken.

Ken: Send Demona a love letter?

Vic: No you don't send her a love letter you little monkey! [Hits Kenny with his fan.] It is now time for Kenny Blankenship's Painful Eliminations of the Day!! [They start showing footage from the event today.]

Ken: The party of carnage begins at number ten...The Archmage tries to cheat to win...but he lies to himself as his teleporting meets out Anti-Teleportation Device...You know who won that battle! At number nine; it's Guy LaDouce who get cuffed by Elisa...Looks like Guy's got some _love_ in the future....At number eight; it's Owen...who nails the Ejacolator and overshoots the release....no lawyer on earth is going to find him innocent....At number seven; it's Ernie who is so hyperactive that he forgets to hold on to the spore and his pants fall above his eyesocket...Someone put him on Prozac!! At number six; it's Ace London who tries to reverse his field...but gravity won that battle and he ends up with a pillow facial...Someone call his sponser!! Don't laugh Baloo because you're number five as you kill the Ejacolator and tumbles into the sludge...That's going to smart on Higher For Hire's financials...OUCH!!.....At number four; it's Gibber who's boot gets slipped up and does a beautiful jawplant....that's called turning the jawbone to dust...At number three; it's Puck who tries to ride the pole....but he misses his mark and nails the head into next week....didn't follow the rules there.....At number two; it's Hacksaw who bullies the shaft; but the shaft bullies back as he takes it right on the checkbone....the power of bendage....And my most henious Painful Elimination goes to...Goliath who get clipped on that platform....GOD; that's too horrible to watch....um; maybe once more....OUCH! That's too painful to watch....um maybe one more time!

Vic: Kenny?!

Ken: Okay; that is enough.....WOW!! [They return to the studio.]

Vic: Kenny; you are a disturbed man...but I still enjoy working with you....

Ken: Of course I am...and so what do we always say?!

All: DON'T GET ELIMINATED!!

[The scene freezes as the credits roll.]

Demona: Oh sweetheart?!

Ken: Hello Demona; are you ready for the...[Sound of a laser blaster firing] OUCH!! My flesh apron!!

Vic I told you she was a human hating sadist...[Sound of laser blaster firing] OW! MY HEAD!!

Demona: [Laughing] I really love you two...when you fry.....!