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Rocking Chair Bear
Reviewed: 09/25/2011
Lady Bane's Last Strand!
Well; we finally come to the final appearance of Lady Bane and this one involves Sunni's hair of all things. So why does Lady Bane want Sunni's hair; you ask?! Let's rant on and find out shall we....?
The story is done by Jymn Magon and Marion Wells; with the teleplay done by Marion Wells. I do not know who animated this episode by the way.
We begin this one at Lady Bane's castle as we see Bane in her room combing her hair talking about some conference involving some of her “friends”. According to Chris Barat; their names are Emmadrille (June Foray) and Evelyn (Russi Taylor). She wants to see her face in the reflection on the floor as the Troggles are mopping the floor of course. The Troggles claim to be done as Bane looks at her reflection and she doesn't look all that hot right now. Bane goes to the mirror and claims that she has a winkle on her face. Well; that pretty much ends all hopes of her being the enlightened heel that I was hoping for. Troggles repeat her and she shoves them away in opposite directions while blowing them off. She throws her mirror away and it shatters on the ground as she proclaims that her beauty spell has worn off and if she doesn't find someone to zap the youth from every 100 years or so; she'll turn into a 1000 year old lady. And if she steps on the glass at that age; she would die too. Yeah; I made that part up; but reality says it's true. Troggles repeat and Bane blows them off as apparently they have pink dots on their cheeks which Bane blows off in kind and throws them away with her magic sparkles of doom right into a large wooden bucket of water. She's got the pissed off female stereotype going today. She goes to the mirror and doesn't want her “friends” to see her as she demands the carriage and gets the SHANE DOUGLAS MOP OF DOOM (with magic of course) and the Troggles get whacked of course as they run out the door. Bane wants to find some sweet young thing as we fade to black with just the eyes showing. If you say so Madam Bane.
So we return back to the forest near a Gummi Bear castle (Huh?!) as we pan east to a road and see a hedge moving and out pops...Sunni? Wait; what?! Sunni moves and of course Cubbi is right there to blow her cover. No one captures Sir Cubbi's flag as Sunni bails and jumps over the river and swings on a branch; breaking it and landing on a log. Okay; now this makes much more sense. Sunni cuts a cute promo as she vaults off the rocks and lands on another log as Cubbi claims that she's all wet. Cubbi jumps on the other side of the log and we see-saw as Sunni grabs a vine on the rebound and swings like Kit and then kicks Cubbi right in the kisser. Oooooooooooooo....I thought that shot was illegal. Toon Disney ignores it though as Sunni makes it to the other side and runs in to grab the flag; but Cubbi suddenly teleports right in front of Sunni to counter. Cubbi; have you been going to Lezard's Magic School again?! Sunni even questions this and Cubbi claims to know all the shortcuts in this area. So Sunni does the old “phantom insect trick” and Cubbi naturally falls for it allowing Sunni to capture the flag easily. Oh Sir Cubbi; she played you like a fiddle. I can only shake my head while you hold your head in shame.
That leads to Cubbi chasing Sunni into the bushes and we tumble into a ball and it's Gummi Bear Wrestling Entertainment #1290. And people are suddenly shocked when we see two eight year old boys in a UFC cage that got people outraged last week. Not that we shouldn't be outraged; but SHOCKED?! And then Gusto get bowled over good. HAHA! I wondered what happened to him. Outside of King Igthorn; this is Gusto's ONLY appearance in the sixth season. For rant purposes; this is the third last appearance for him actually (World According to Gusto and King Igthorn being the others). Cubbi and Sunni are in a heap and Gusto seems mad...and then he gets inspired. HAHA! The Gummi logo needs work as Gusto remembers the games he played. Sunni claims that she's not playing (Riiiigggghhhhttttt Sunni!) and that she is taking care of Cubbi. However; she offers to pose for Gusto anyway and Gusto declines because she's in wrestling terms; green as a goad. A few years later and she'll have the seasoning as he picks a twig from her hair. And then Gusto end arounds them as he grabs their arms and wants to show them his latest masterpiece as they exit stage right. Ah; Gusto Vaino; I wish you gave those lessons to El Drakeco. BLAM! HEE HEE! Missed again Drake! YOU ARE NOT...POW! OUCH! Ummmm....
Anyhow; we segue to inside the kitchen of Gummi Glenn as Gusto is kneading either white clay or dough. It's hard to tell actually. He is already done as he molds it into the shape of a human foot. HEE HEE! Gruffi has his trademark pose on full blast and is not amused. Gusto uses the fork to poke holes into his masterpiece as Sunni and Cubbi are about as confused as I am over Gusto's promo cutting. Tummi cannot hear anything of course which Gusto blows off and then goes over to Gruffi as he wants him and Tummi to come with him to the quarry to find a huge chunk of marble which Gruffi blows off of course. Grammi of course thinks it's a better idea than ruining bread dough as she reshapes the dough in the pan and storms off stage right. Tummi thinks it's a good idea as Cubbi wants to come too and Gusto isn't so sure as he pulls the hat over Cubbi's eyes. Gruffi agrees with Gusto because it's not safe for kids. So Tummi is officially an adult now. Fine by me as Sunni plays mother to Cubbi on that one; but tries to leave, and Gruffi won't let her go either. HEE HEE! Sunni is pissed off because she doesn't like being treated like a child. Maybe it's because you are a child, or more so a teenybopper. Maybe when you stop being a diva; they'll take you more seriously. And she's going outside to prove it too. Now at this point; it would make sense to have Cubbi call her out on it. But that NEVER happens. I'm calling logic break #1 for the episode right there.....
So we head into Shadow Forest (as Gruffi stated earlier) as it's AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark) as Sunni is in the forest already. Sunni concedes that Gusto was right about the place being unfriendly as a crow annoys her; forcing her to bail behind some thorn vines. Coward! EYES OF DOOM beckon; Sunni gets scared as we see a squirrel come towards her and Sunni feels relieved. Then the squirrel bails and Sunni gets netted before she can even move. The eyes end up being about four Troggles in the trees. We then cut to the stage coach as Lady Bane is growing more impatient and older by the minute. I know this because her hand is looking like a witch's hand now. The Troggles return with Sunni in the net as they dump her in front of Lady Bane who looks more under the weather than usual. Even Sunni notices it and she thinks it's repulsive. THAT'S AGEISM~! Bane tells her not to worry as she orders the Troggle to load her into the stage coach. So Sunni grabs onto her robe and Bane is getting even more pissed off than usual as the tug of war ensues and the Troggles somehow lose as Sunni knocks Bane down onto the ground. Somehow that frees her from the nets and she runs away stage left. So the Troggles run after her as the chase is on BABEE! Sunni takes out her vial of roided juice and drinks it. It's BUTT BOUNCING TIME and the Troggles still manage to grab her. You know you are screwed as a Gummi Bear when THAT happens.
Sunni still manage to bounce with them in tow though as she bounces them onto some thorny bushes and manages to get them off of her; but not without Troggle #1 grabbing about four locks of hair from her head (OUCH!) before Sunni finally bounces away stage left. Sunni feels relieved about escaping; but sulks that she'll never catch up with the adults as she sulks away stage left. We cut back to the stage coach as Lady Bane paces around as her patience is wearing thin. She even threatens to sic the Boggles on them if the Troggles fail which sounds like she's losing touch with reality actually. So two Troggles return with the locks of Sunni's hair as Lady Bane threatens them with violence. However; she notices the hair and grabs it from them as they did something right. Bane proclaims that this is all they needed. So why bother kidnapping her in the first place and all that drama? Just cut the hair from her and humanely release her. Easy. Oh wait; that wouldn't make her an effective heel; my mistake. Lady Bane gets back into the stage coach and the Troggle whip the horse and leave stage right as Bane proclaims that every minute feels like 100 years.
So we head back to Gummi Glenn with some drum banging from the previous segue as we head into the hallway as Sunni as she sneaks into her room and is already in bed as Grammi goes in wondering where she is and then notices her in her bed. She proclaims that things look different in the morning as she kisses her on the cheek and tucks her in for the night. Grammi leaves the room and Sunni wakes up. So we scene change to Bane's lab as Lady Bane is at her table of chemical potions as there is a crystal like pillar which she replaces the white lock of hair with the yellow one she stole from Sunni. She cuts a “youth is wasted on the young” promo which in hindsight; is quite accurate, only not for beauty reasons. She is so old that she needs the magnifying glass just to read the spell book. I'm not going to bother revealing the spell because it's in proper English and not Gummi Bear speak anyway. Strangely; the door in the background has a cross on it which is downright weird for a witch who has hexagrams and pentagrams (although Christianity used to use the pentagram too in it's history.) as the hair sparkles and we see Lady Bane with a bad back staggering to her chair as she proclaims that by tomorrow she's 50 years younger. Strangely; she's back to almost normal within thirty seconds for logic break #2 for the episode. I think she meant 500 years younger. Besides; the 500 motif is part of the series; so why not use that instead?! Cue evil laugh and that ends the segment nine and a half minutes in.
After the commercial break; we head back to the dining room table as everyone except Sunni is having breakfast. Tummi proclaims that the trip to the quarry gave him the munchies so to speak as he pours maple syrup over the flapjacks and he's clearly going for the record of overflow which Cubbi rightfully protests. Tummi runs out; so Cubbi uses a flapjack for a mask and invokes the fork of death and demands Tummi to fork over the syrup as per the order of Sir Cubbi. HAHA! Sunni finally walks in yawning and she greets everyone. Cubbi notices that Sunni is getting bigger and about a foot taller than usual. Sunni admits that something is happening since she barely got into her elf tunic this morning as Gruffi ribs Grammi's washing skills. If only Gruffi; if only. Grammi nicely blows him off as she proclaims that Sunni is growing up before our eyes as Gruffi is surprised too. Grammi and Sunni walk out of the dining room because Grammi has some clothes that she had been saving just for her. So we head to a shot inside the CHEST OF DEMONS as Grammi opens it up and shows her a crimson red dress with brown sleeve as Grammi talks about a festival of the first Gummi Berry. Sunni sizes up the dress and dances around thinking that Gusto will take her seriously now as Gruffi comes in and Sunni trips and falls on her ass. HEE HEE! Need to work on your dancing skills madam Sunni?! Gruffi wants some help with fixing some stuff and he would like some advice from her. Wow; Gruffi actually asking for advice without weasel words from Sunni? Now we are really going out of character here. Sunni likes that......
...and so we head inside a room as Sunni is wearing the dress now and goes on about flowers as Gruffi has a paintbrush and paints his cheeks white as he asks what color to paint the room with. Wait; shouldn't this be Gusto's big scene now?! Sunni gets on the dresser and states that painting it the colors of her dress will do as Cubbi runs in and circles the dresser as he asks her to come out and play. Sunni refuses because she's busy as Cubbi spins the mirror and Sunni gets spun out. HAHA! Gruffi wipes the paint from his cheek and then notices Sunni spinning and stops the mirror's progress as Sunni's hair is messed up. Cubbi giggles on that one so much that his feather on the cap changes from red to yellow. Bad form there animators. Sunni blows him off not understanding how she puts up with him. Cubbi does the Gruffi pose (oh; the irony) and blows her off for being no fun at all.
Gruffi breaks this up before it even starts and here comes Gusto asking what the heck is going on here. He notices Sunni and he goes ga-ga over her and asks her to ditch the flowers and strike a pose for him. Sunni agrees to do just that as Sunni and Gusto walk out with hands together as Gruffi asks if Sunni has forgotten something. Gusto gleefully answers that one for me as Gruffi proclaims that she still has the attention span of a kid. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Not to mention that this plays into the plot later on actually. So we head back to Lady Bane's lab as Troggle #1 (cross dressing again) is dusting up the table as Bane is in her throne looking in the mirror like a vain female stereotype. So Troggle #1 goes over dusting and unintentionally dusts off the crystal pillar as it falls; but Lady Bane uses the GEDO MAGIC TRACTOR BEAM to keep the crystal from falling. Naturally she is pissed off as usual. She blows off the Troggle of course for keeping her hair out of place and demands that it get back to work and the Troggle sells like the one track mind that it has.
So we scene change to behind the waterfall as Sunni is posing like an angel while Gusto is hammering the marble to create such a pose. Ah; I see he's going for the Andy Warhol effect again. Arte Deco is posing on the rock and blows Gusto off for keeping the drama going on far past the expiry date and Sunni agrees with him in kind. Arte Deco wants a break; but Gusto's creative juices are flowing and nothing is stopping him now. Sunni is tired at this point as Sunni is on one foot on a chair and she clearly cannot hold the pose for very much longer and even Gusto realizes that Sunni is going to fall into the river as he runs in; but Sunni falls into the drink well before Gusto can reach her. Gusto helps her out of the river as Sunni coughs up water and Gusto concedes that it's time to hang up the hammer for the night so his favorite model gets some sleep. Sunni walks off with the Gruffi pose shivering claiming that at this rate; she'll get bags under her bags under her eyes; if that makes sense to anyone. So we head to Gummi Glenn in the morning as we cut to the hallway with Grammi knocking on the door in Sunni's room. Grammi opens the door and Sunni is under the covers as Grammi tells Sunni that Gusto is here. Sunni apologizes and she sounds like an old lady too as she claims to be very stiff from the posing. Grammi notices the voice and pulls the cover off and ….HOLY CRAP! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO SUNNI?! Grammi uses softer words than me along with DUBBED ANIME STYLE swearing; but the guise of it is the same. Sunni looks in the nearby mirror and she is SHOCKED and APPALLED as we end the segment 14 and a half minutes in.
After the commercial break; we see all the Gummi Bears (except Cubbi and Gusto) in the room looking worried about Sunni's condition while she looks in the mirror. Gruffi thinks it's another bad growth spurt and Tummi suggests winkle cream. Grammi blows that off because this is clearly unnatural. Sunni appears almost ready to sob; but there is no tears to be shed from her as Zummi (who finally speaks almost 15 minutes into this episode!) asks her how this could have happened. Sunni doesn't know for sure; but she does mention Lady Bane and everyone is in shock. Grammi asks why she didn't tell anyone. Sunni claimed that it wasn't a big deal and the Troggles only got her hair. Zummi doesn't like this at all because Lady Bane can do horrible things with one strand of hair. Geez; you THINK Zummi Gummi?! So we segue to Grammi putting a pink pillow against the seat of a rocking chair as Sunni slowly sits down in it thus paying off the episode title. Zummi looks in the Great Book as this is exactly as he feared (I see Gusto is here too) as Lady Bane has stolen Sunni's youth. And if they don't get it back soon; Sunni is finished. I know that some purists will claim that this is a BS&P spot; but really this makes perfect sense in the context of Sunni's situation. Similar to Venom using the word destroy because in the proper context, he DID want to ruin Peter Parker's life completely before Peter dies; not just kill him. Sunni is getting ruined before our eyes and thus saying that she's finished makes sense since she is going to be in so much pain and misery before she officially dies unless this is stopped and reversed.
Gruffi wants in as he wants to tear Lady Bane's castle apart to get that hair back. Something tells me he wants to do more than just that. Everyone else joins in as Sunni wants in; but Grammi holds her back because she's too old and in no condition to go. I really don't like the fact that Grammi called her old. It sounds so ageism that it isn't funny and it's hypocritical given Zummi's age at this point. Sunni is not thrilled to hear that either. So we head back to Lady Bane's castle as Lady Bane is fully back to normal and the conference has just started as Emmadrille (the purple dressed witch with a crescent moon on her hat and wearing glasses) and Evelyn (the orange cheese whiz dressed witch) walk in and we exchange greetings and notes. Bane claims that her secret to youth is so simple they wouldn't believe it. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. Of course she doesn't want to be a selfish witch either as she motions them to the drawing room for some tea as she wants to hear the latest gossip that is brewing.
We pan over to the big ass window as it's BEFORE HAPPY HOUR (Sunset) as Gruffi, Gusto and Zummi climb in as Gruffi proclaims that they are crewing and they are not leaving without Sunni's hair. So we head back to the book room as Sunni is in her rocking chair sleeping and snoring. Grammi and Tummi decide to leave to let her rest as they leave the book room. Sunni wakes up and blows everyone off for making her look like a weak ass cripple (my words, not hers) and she goes to the door and she is not going to look like a fuddy duddy which is funny considering the number of times she blew off Gruffi as such. So we head back to inside Lady Bane's castle as Gruffi and Gusto look around and Gusto naturally blows off Lady Bane's lack of good home décor sense. Gusto continues to suggest home décor tips as Gruffi comes over to inform him to quit thinking about something other than vanity. Yeah; because that would steal Drake Mallard's heat BEFORE he exists right Gruffo?! Zummi walks over to the conviently placed lever (WRONG LEVER!) and leans on it in such a way that it somehow pushes up while he's pondering over where Lady Bane keep's Sunni's hair. Zummi deduces that she keeps it near her spell books as Gruffi invokes the POINTY FINGER OF DEATH near the table where the stand for the crystal is. Sadly; Zummi's gaffe allows the PLANET GLOBE THING OF A BOB OF DOOM to spin like crazy.
We cut to outside as the Troggles hear the noise and they jump into the room much to Gruffi's dismay as we head to Lady Bane's drawing room as we sit at the table and the witches exchange notes and thoughts before we hear a crash and Lady Bane proclaims that it's hard to find good help these days. Bane tells them that she needs to leave for a moment as she leaves and we cut back to the Troggles stalking the Gummi Bears. It's hard to take that one seriously considering that they are named after a gelatin sweet candy. Gruffi blitzes for the crystal; but the Troggle counters by tacking him down. It looks like a double cross-body block on each other I should note. Gusto explains the obvious situation to us as Lady Bane calls it curtains for the Gummi Bears as she uses the TRACTOR BEAM HANDS (what; no Gedo sparkle? Fine by me...) as the trio of Gums rises into the air and get wrapped up into the conveniently placed red curtains. HAHA! See; make the joke and then pay it off. So we segue to the bridge of the castle as Sunni is walking with the help of a walking stick proclaiming that she now knows how Grammi feels after spring cleaning. Which is not much different if she walked normally. She struggles to get the doors open as they weigh a ton. She's probably right on that one too even if she was her normal age.
Anyhow; we return back to Lady Bane as she shows the Troggles her new Gummi mobiles as the Trio of Gums are tied up and hung from the ceiling. Bane decides to leave with the Troggles as once the guests leave; she will talk turkey about borrowing the Great Book of Gummi. Bane walks out of the hallway with the Troggles as Sunni conveniently pops from her hiding spot and walks in much to the surprise of the Trio of Gums. Sunni wants to get them down; but Gruffi tells her to ignore them and go for the crystal where her hair is. Sunni is pretty much out of breath and barely able to stand at this point as the tea tray Troggle squad notices Sunni right away and we quickly cut back to the drawing room (funny segue methinks!) as we hear a loud crash and Lady Bane is not amused and her urge to be pissed off is rising. She walks out and into her room as the place is a mess and the mobiles are swinging around. Lady Bane is PISSED as she uses her ruby stone head to tractor beam a wooden table at the back wall as Sunni's cover is blown and she's shaking like a leaf. I'm amazed that she can even sell THAT at this point considering her age. Sunni barely stands up as Lady Bane asks if she's here for her youth and Sunni states that she is. Bane blows her off and uses the sparkle magic to shove Sunni down on her ass again. Sunni blows it off and tries to run (Huh? At that age?) and vault off the throne chair; but she lands in the chair. HAHA! Once again as I stated with Huey Duck in Feats of Clay: That spot always results in landing on the seat; it so happened that Baloo was on the seat when Molly plopped on his big belly. Idiots!
Bane mocks her as Sunni climbs onto the top of the seat and Sunni blows her off while swinging on the chandelier (oh my; we have a live one) but that leads nowhere for Sunni either. Sunni drops on her ass again as Bane mocks her again and proclaims that she is smarter than her. Sparkle Tractor Beam ensues as Sunni rises up so Sunni goes for her “phantom insect trick” and Lady Bane falls for it hook, line and sinker. Damn; I knew that prank would be involved somehow in the finish. Sunni drops on her ass with a MAN-SIZED bump (OUCH!) as she instantly recovers and grabs the yellow hair just as Bane calls her a vixen. Needless to say; Sunni becomes her normal age and Lady Bane becomes an old hag as she demands that hair back. Sunni mocks her to come get it and calls her grandma. Lady Bane is pissed; as Sunni goes to the drapes and pulls the cloth lever (WRONG LEVER!) and Lady Bane somehow gets engulfed by the curtain as it's going to be a long wait. Bane calls for the Troggles; but no dice as Sunni brings the Trio of Gums down to floor ground and everyone is unchained. Gusto praises Sunni; but Gruffi wants to get the hell out of here as everyone drinks their vials of roided juice. It's BUTT BOUNCING TIME! The Troggles run in; but they miss the bouncing bears by a mile as Bane finally pops up from the carnage and proclaims that they let them get away. So she'll pluck the hair from them instead...and there is lots to get as the Troggles run away and it's the SCOOBY DOO CHASE SEQUENCE THE TROGGLE HUNTING EDITION~! Yes folks; this is exactly the last scene involving Lady Bane as she chases them out of the castle. Emmadrille and Evelyn come out and are shocked to see Bane let herself go like that. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments.
So we head to Gummi Glenn and at the table as Sunni is happy to be safe and sound. Zummi and Grammi praise Sunni for growing up after all as Gusto walks in with his latest masterpiece as he uncovers it and it looks like the unfinished storyboard from An Elephant Never Suspects. HAHA! The Gummi Bears are in shock as Gusto proclaims that they need to wait a few years. Gruffi thinks Sunni is still mature enough to finish the decorating of a room; but Sunni notices Cubbi and wants to finish their game of capturing the flag as she wants to finish up being a kid beforehand. Now that is pretty sweet; almost TaleSpin like; or the ending to It Came From Beneath the SeaDuck. Sunni manages to steal the flag from Cubbi and they run out of the main room to end the episode at 20:56. A few silly logic breaks aside and some bizarre selling from old Sunni; this episode was great. I just wish Lady Bane would have died though after she got old because she was done anyway as a character in this series. **** ¼ (85%).
THE REVIEW LINE
Wow; that's three good episodes from 1991. I'm surprised in a way; although they are far from perfect; Rocking Chair Bear was really the best one of the lot actually. In a strange way; I truly felt sorry for Sunni turning old and almost on death's door since she was finally coming to her own as a mature character instead of the teenybopper diva she usually plays in this series. Lady Bane was great as usual as they developed the whole “Lady Bane is finished if she doesn't become a vampire and suck the youth out of someone” angle fairly well. Considering that this was her final appearance; I would have added her dropping dead chasing the Troggles considering that the episode ran about 15 seconds shorter than usual. I'm guessing that it was planned; but BS&P stepped in. The episode was marred a bit with silly logic breaks and a few contrived moments where Sunni had to sell like she was young to get the spot to work right near the end; but otherwise, I liked this episode and I liked Sunni. Weird actually; I liked Monty being old as well; so maybe there is something to crappy characters being too old that gets them really over. Who knows?!
Anyhow; next weekend is Trading Faces which is the second episode involving Sir Victor and then we really go downhill with May The Best Princess Win which features Calla Vs. Marie round two. Trading Faces looks interesting at least. Then there's the Rite Stuff which should also be interesting at face value; but considering how True Gritty went; I wouldn't hold my breath. Finally; I return to season five with The World According To Gusto (and if I'm lucky My Kingdom For A Pie) before finally ending the series with King Igthorn which should be EPIC; most so the first part. So......
Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you all next time.