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The Golden Sprocket Of Friendship Re-Rant

Reviewed: 10/10/2010
Additional Commentary: 09/30/2021

With Friends Like These; Who Needs Michael Eisner?!

Original Airdate: 09/27/1990 (Syndication), Episode #18 (TaleSpin DVD Volume 1, Disc 2), Episode #21 (Production Order).

The Golden Sprocket Of Friendship Notes
The Golden Sprocket Of Friendship Transcript

So, we finally conclude disc two of this volume with the first appearance of Colonel Spigot since The Idol Rich and in a shock of all shocks, Spigot is not a heel here. Remember what I said about Shere Khan being a tweener in this series; here's another example of one. No one ever accused TaleSpin of being consistant; but at least I say it as if it wasn't a bad thing either. (2015 Gregory Weagle Says: There were a few instances in Ducktales and Gummi Bears where the heels had to join up with the babyfaces; but they were always constructed as natural heels. In TaleSpin; only Don Karnage is a true villain. Shere Khan is basically a master manipulator and doesn't care what alignment you are, while Colonel Spigot is a product of his country's wacky enivornment. Plus; Dunder is almost a pure babyface as Spigot's aide regardless of the episode. It makes for some really interesting dynmanics. In this case; let's have a short joke against another short joke: Trader Moe and his goons. The plot for this episode is: Colonel Spigot arrives in Cape Suzette to present his country's most amazing treasure at the Friendship Festival: a golden sprocket. This gives Trader Moe ideas to steal it while using Baloo and Kit as a decoy. Meanwhile; Baloo and Kit are selling hotdogs even though they were supposed to deliver a piano for Rebecca. Mayhem ensues.) Let's rant on shall we...?!

This episode is written by the late Steve Sustarsic whom passed away in 2018. The story was edited by Mark Zaslove. The animation is done by Walt Disney Animation (Japan) Inc. and additional services provided by Hanho Heung Up Company Limited. (Nope 2010 Me! According to the credit lists, it's Tama Production Company Limited in it's second appearance out of four episodes!)

We begin this one with a shot of the cliff guns of Cape Suzette with a yellow plane flying in and then we go into Cape Suzette with a blimp flying around as we hear Chuck McCann's voice welcoming everyone to the Cape Suzette Friendship Festival. We then cut to a sky shot of the stage as various worker furries are working on the stage and a walrus furry who looks almost like a dead ringer to Tuskerinni. The mayor dodges all the 2X4's he can within a one minute span while reading at the same time. We see a rhino, a brown dog, hamster and weasel in that sequence. (Wow; 2010 Me figured out who most of the furries were in that sequence? 2015 Me's clueless on half of them.) We even see someone using the jackhammer (Disney Captions mistakes it as a drill. Disney Captions cannot do good subtitles, what a shocker?!) and I have zero idea what the spieces that one is. The jackhammer was invented in 1861 by the way; so another invention can exist in this world. We also see dogs falling from the ceiling just before the jackhammer takes a MAN-SIZED bump off-screen. The mayor proclaims that they join in goodwill and brotherhood (SEXIST~!). Then the pink curtain drops on him in some symbolic gesture. We then go to the Cape Suzette Airport as we see planes land and Kit is noting all of them like Jim Ross on speed. We have a Groman C-60, Breskin 1-11, and even a Krellman Special from Nosanbique (I think my notes say Nosenbeak and I like Disney Caption's version better. (Yup; it's better and I think it's the second time in canon that the country was mentioned. Sadly; we never got to see the country in the show.)).We also see a limo without a roof top (it is sunny so it's perfectly okay). We then cut to a gate as Baloo and Kit are behind the gate as Baloo is wearing a hot dog suit and Kit is wearing a pickle suit. Yeah; let's make Kit look like a complete tool while we are at it, Pop-A-Bear. Shouldn't Kit be wearing the hotdog suit since HE'S the hotdogger of the series? (Oh; I don't know 2010 Me. I mean Kit in a pickle suit is still better than being in a hotdog suit and then giving Fish Hooks ideas. I think Kit dressed as a chili pepper is even more buys than Milo in one; but that's just me. Even more hilarious; Pickle from Pickle & Peanut cosplayed Zip Skyboard, which is a parody of Kit with footwear. HA!)

Baloo calls this aviation heaven (Religious reference number one for the episode) as an elephant furry with glasses on opens the gate. Baloo does his dumb hotdog pitch while using a hand gas flamethrower (!!) on the weenies. Hotdogs: the universal food for dicks everywhere. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ZAP! OUCH! Ummmm... (Wow; a sex joke that was somewhat witty from 2010 Me. I'm shocked the Q104.3 boys haven't stolen that one yet. Or they have and I didn't hear them use it. Either way; it had some wit behind it.) We then get a shot of the limo on the side and see a driver furry, for whom I don't know his spieces. (I'm certain now that it wasn't Seymour from All's Whale That Ends Whale despite looking that way in the far shot. I think the limo driver is a grey wolf now that I think about it. No clue which spieces the harem dancers are since they are fully covered up.), driving Prince Neverhas Beenbroke and his harem ladies wearing colored burkas. ZOINKS! Now there's something you'll NEVER see in Disney again. (Oh; I don't know. I wouldn't be shocked if they allowed that. I thinkj Pickle & Peanut allowed this spot at least once in their show.) Baloo offers the hotdogs for three dollars and ninty-eight cents and the driver drives off stage right. I see Baloo comes from the School of Cinema Snack Food Business. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Kit coughes and sells the dust just to be Kit as Baloo lowers it to 98 cents. HA! Baloo thinks that he just had breakfast. Or maybe he is a Muslim and he hates pork because it goes against his religion. Have you ever thought of that Pop-A-Racist-Bear?! (Calm down 2010 Me! Occam Razor suggests that it was breakfast too. I guess he might also be ignoring Baloo after Baloo, Kit and Rebecca were arguing at each other in I Only Have Ice For You.) Baloo and Kit decide to eat some of the profits as Kit puts mustard on that dog (How ironic?!) and eats it. R.J. Williams even remembers to change his voice tone to indicate that he is eating with his mouth full. Good attention to detail there guys! We then look up and hear engines whirr as we see the THEMBRIAN PLANE OF DOOM manage to turn around while doing the wheel sequence in the opposite direction.

I'm tempted to call that logic break number one; but they are Thembrians. You all know that if you don't break logic and reason, YOU CAN BE SHOT! I know it's a Thembrian plane because the plane lands slicing into the runway at full neck speed and destroying about ten planes, the gate and the hotdog stand causing Baloo and Kit to drop onto the ground. (Interesting moment: Apparently; one large rock landed on Kit during this sequence. Kit and Baloo yell "Thembrian" in the audio as a sigular term instead of pural "Thembrians" which is what Disney Captions wrote. I think Disney Captions makes more sense here at least.) Oh goody; this ought to be fun as the door opens and the stairs drop with a MAN-SIZED bump as we do the up shot of Colonel Spigot's hat before panning down to reveal the ultimate short joke. (This is usually the routine for introducing Spigot: Frame the shot as if Spigot is seven feet tall and big and then pan down to show that he's only less than half that height. In fact, Spigot is shorter than Kit is.) Spigot walks out as he calls it the soft underbelly of the world and can smell the decadence. HAHA! Colonel Spigot even trips for fun and that was weak sauce as Sgt. Dunder arrives with the CHEST OF DEMONS proclaiming that it smells like hotdogs. Spigot of course blows him off because there are more important things to do. See; Colonel Spigot is ready to be processed and even has his stamp and pen ready to fill out the proper forms and paperwork. No one ever accused Colonel Spigot of underthinking a situation; no siree. Dunder tells him that Cape Suzette doesn't do such things like that. Of course not; because if they did, Kit Cloudkicker would be in prison on terrorism charges. If anything; Kit would be the REASON why we would be doing such things like that in Thembria. (It's funny how I managed to unintentionally inspire a generation of moral guardians on a half joke/half overthinking thought about Kit's relation with the Air Pirates. Read any of the IMDB/TV.com reviews of many of the modern cartoons to see why. Jeepers, creepers; I thought I was a scumbag.) Spigot is SHOCKED to hear that as there is no triplicate E1-18's and no day long line. Funny how that a bit of Thembrian's culture could be translated into our broder crossings nowadays.

Colonel Spigot cannot understand as Dunder apologizes for all because it's his fault see. HAHA! I betcha Dunder would apologize for his and Spigot's haircut too. In other words: Mr. Satoru Iwata. Spigot blows him off again as he wants the preparations in perfect order as he steps onto a rock pile to make him look taller. Too bad it does nothing to increase the size of his dick. (Or in this case; his restraint.) See; he is going to present to the friendship festival...wait for it..the Thembrian Golden Sprocket. (Yes folks; he's going to present a gear made of gold to the mayor. Yes; I have ruined the finish even though it says "Golden Sprocket" clearly in the name of the episode title. Also of note: The Japanese version of the episode title is translated as: "The Torikaese Golden Gear!" which is even more obvious even with the romance name of Thembrian being Torikasese.) He orders Dunder to stay and guard it like his life depended on it because it does since if you allow the golden sprocket to fall into the wrong hands. YOU WILL BE SHOT! Spigot walks away stage right as Baloo and Kit clean their hotdog stand and Spigot proclaims that this is a friendship festival and you cannot trust anyone. HAHA! (Can I have a drop on that line? That's a money line right there. As we will find out soon enough; he really couldn't trust anyone. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: You can find short clips of TaleSpin on the No Context TaleSpin twitter account.)) Spigot cuts his heard of me promo and walks away stage right. We then pan over to the alleyway as the goons and Trader Moe are hiding behind the alleyway. Trader Moe proclaims that the box is valuable and wants the goons to steal it. Gorilla Goon and Rhino Goon act like Hack and Slash for fun as Trader Moe than notices Baloo and Kit with the hotdog stand wheeling it towards the Thembrian airplane. Moe has a Krackpotkin plan involving hotdog suits and planes. Ooookkkkkaaayyyy. We then see Dunder closing up the Thembrian plane and Baloo and Kit greet Dunder. Dunder turns around, locks the plane and plays safety guard to amuse me. (So yeah, Baloo and Kit know who Dunder is right away; which means they know who Spigot is and just act dumb to play head games.)

Kit tells Dunder that they are trying to get rich selling hotdogs. Dunder loves hotdogs and comes over as Baloo decides to give one on the house for Dunder because they are pals. See; Dunder is the only real babyface in Thembria (Not really; you forgot Bobbo and the children of Thembria in Flight School Confidential.) while everyone else is either an outright heel or in most cases tweeners like Colonel Spigot. That makes this children's cartoon not so childish. (Damon is right that cartoons are childish by their very nature; but I think he doesn't realize that most fiction irregardless if it's a cartoon or live action is childish, because it's not real and believing in fiction is childish. The difference is; cartoon don't have to pretend that it's real while live action tries way too hard to look real, when it's still an fictional event just the same.) Baloo flamethrows a hotdog and then gives it to Dunder. Dunder tells Baloo not to tell Colonel Spigot because if you eat on duty: YOU CAN BE SHOT...or worse. (And in Colonel Spigot's case; we would soon find out what "worse" is.) Yeah; that's the running joke for the Thembrians. Baloo agrees to be mum on that and wants to be excused; but Rebecca's voice beckons. UH OH! We then see Rebecca coming out of the green truck with a wooden box on the back as she has the WRAITH OF BECKEY on full blast today. She even kicks Baloo right in the ass for good measure. HAHA! And that was a good one too. (Seeing Rebecca kick Baloo's ass is funny; more so when Baloo is in a hotdog suit. However; is this really neccessary? I think this is one of the few times where Rebecca's jerkiness was not really justified. Thankfully; she would start to calm down as the episode goes on; instead of being full on jerk for fifteen minutes like in The Bigger They Are, The Louder They Oink.) Rebecca drags Baloo by the arms and tells him to hurl his buns back to the office as Kit follows with the hotdog stand. (I'm so disappointed in you Miss Cunningham. If you are going to be a jerk today; pull Baloo's ear and then drag him away by said ear. Always instant amusement from me.) We then see Dunder pondering about eating the hotdog and then finally eats it for real.

So we head to Higher...For...Hire as Rebecca shows the clipboard of doom and wants the piano delievered to the top of the hill. (While talking without complete sentences, as if this is required for Baloo to understand. Yep; she's being difficult today. Oh well; now that Libby Hinson is writing Rebecca episodes; it makes the jerk moments of Rebecca more forgivable and prevents Flanderizing the character. Now; I assumed when Baloo looked up that it was the hill; but the address Rebecca actually gave was in the suburbs of Cape Suzette below the hill and not on the top of that huge hill.) Baloo and Kit complain about it taking all day and wanting to work the crowds at the festival. Rebecca tells that they can go back to selling hotdogs after they move the piano. Sounds reasonable to me. (That was fine; but she really didn't need to kick Baloo's ass to get him to do something.) So; Baloo pushes the piano into the back of the truck via the wooden boards and then a car shows up and starts yelling at the hotdog and pickle costumed tools. Hey buster; just drive AROUND the truck! The pig driver decides to drive around the truck after all; but somehow the car attaches to the axle of the truck and pulls the axle right out of the truck. The car drives away with the truck axle and wheels as Baloo gets a MAN-SIZED squash from the piano for his trouble as Kit shows his light touch does work as the piano stops. As Kick's Buttowski's Wade would say:

Wade: Woah! Didn't see that one coming.

The light touch to stop the piano part by; not the car driving away with the truck axle. (Certainly not Baloo getting sqaushed by the piano.) Wade would have seen that one coming though. Kit blows off the car driver as a road hog. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. (Because the driver is a literal pig furry. He might be a 1930's version of Oolong from Dragon Ball now that I think about it.) Baloo and Kit realize that they need help and Baloo has one person in mind who is big, willing and likes hot dogs. If you cannot guess who it is; you have no business reading this rant. We return to the Thembrian airplane after the scene changer to see Baloo putting on a mustard outfit to disguise Dunder so that Colonel Spigot doesn't suspect a thing. Dunder tries to plead to Baloo that he cannot desert his post because if you desert your post, YOU CAN BE SHOT! Or worse; Colonel Spigot would rip out his spleen. Oooooooh. I betcha that won't be allowed in the new Disney anymore. (Nope; but they will allow you to have Oscar punched in the face on screen half a dozen times by Jumbo Shrimp in Fish Hooks. Oh; and nosebleeds, don't forget about that one, 2010 me.) We then see Kit make another hotdog with ketchup and relish and Baloo's never fail secret sauce (I think. (No; there was no third garnish in that sequence 2010 Me. I should also note that Kit managed to use a butter knife to spread the ketchup and relish instead of a spoon.)) as Baloo uses the SMELL OF DOOM to seduce Dunder into helping him as Baloo sweet talks him into helping him solve his problem. Baloo is in big, big trouble if he doesn't deliver the piano on time and Dunder tries to grab the hotdog but misses and screws up tying his fingers together. HAHA! Dunder swears in DUBBED ANIME STYLE (gosh) and agrees to help as long as he gets back before Colonel Spigot finds out. Baloo likes it; so he opens the mustard bottle and slams a hotdog in it. Okay; that was more disturbing than I had intended. We head onto the streets of Cape Suzette as they head on the hill about a hundred fifty feet away. Dunder and Baloo let go of the piano, it drives itself down the hill and crashes into the front door of the house and the piano suffers no damage whatsoever.

Damn, that piano is tougher than Steve Williams. Which one? Does it really matter? (Yes; because one is deceased (Steven Williams) and one is still alive and still very popular (Steve Austin).) Baloo invokes the clipboard of doom on the conveniently placed doorbell; but no one answers. Kit deduces that they are probably on their way to the friendship festival anyway. Baloo and Kit push the hotdog cart to prepare for them for Baloo's special hotdogs. Eeeeewwwwww! GET IT AWAY! GET IT AWAY! Dunder no sells because he needs to get back to the airport. Baloo tells him that it's on the route back and offers Dunder to push the hotdog cart. Dunder takes it as Kit is happy ("Hot-dogger!" So it was Mickey Mouse who stole Kit's promo for the ending of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse?! I should have known that mouse was up to no good! (It's also the same promo Milo uses in Fish Hooks; only without the "-ger" part.)) as they walk towards the city. We head to the stage as the mayor of Cape Suzette is on stage with his notes at the podium with the Prancing Pgymies from Patagoita (A suburb from of Island of Zibaldo in The Bigger They Are The Louder They Oink.) making their appearance doing the pgymies dance with their spears. This was their patent conga rain dance (Which produced no rain; showing that it's clear that the dance doesn't do anything. Kind of like a mayor praying for rain in a drought instead of biting the bullet and buying irrgation systems.) . We cut to a park with palm trees as we see the goons and Trader Moe in hotdog, mustard and pickle suits with their hotdog stand filled with TNT dynamite. We see more furries including a small boy blond bear who looks like Molly's brother and a few others I cannot make out as spieces. (One of them is a brown dog with a mustache, the small boy is clearly Teddy from A Baloo Switcheroo, but I have no idea about the blond furred adult. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Apparently, Teddy's full name is Teddy TaleSpin and he's a bigot of the worst kind. I'm not surprised, I called him Teddy Scarcutta in my fanfic "Clouding Riches" and he called Kit a pussy-whipped wuss when the Jungle Aces tickled Kit after Kit won the preview track & field race before A Baloo Switcheroo.))

Trader Moe blows the goons off (Disney Captions laughably calls him a gangster despite us already knowing that it's Trader Moe from Time Waits For No Bear. Granted; he wasn't named until Double Or Nothing.) because they aren't selling hotdogs. Goons do the Hack & Slash routine and Trader Moe gets flustered. See; they are dressed up to fool Dunder at the airport. If he isn't fooled then we murder him literally with TNT in the hotdog stand. This is fitting since Moe is really Gator Sam in a pickle disguise basically. Then we see a moose hotdog buyer (who sounds like Gyro Gearloose so it's either Hal Rayle or the late Hal Smith again. (I think this is the only known moose furry in the entire series. I wonder if the 1989/1990 Ducktales' episodes got more influenced by TaleSpin as a result of TaleSpin's style?)) wearing all blue wanting a hotdog. Gorilla Goon wants to sell as Moe slaps Gorilla Goon's disguise and blows off the moose because they are fresh out as the moose gleefully points out that he has one in his hand. (Like an idiot I might add since he has no idea that it was a stick of dynamite.) Moe asks if he wants a hotdog and so he puts a TNT stick into a bun; lights the fuse and throws it to the moose. The moose grabs it and the goon squad bails stage right; allowing the TNT stick to explode right into his face and we have the blackface of doom and soot all over the moose. OUCH! (There was no blackface present 2010 Me. He was covered in ash and soot; but the stick blew up in his right hand. Remember that for a little later on.) We see the goon squad running into the street at the corner as the babyface dogs run in from the opposite direction and we get the MAN-SIZED crash as the hotdogs and buns fly. Everyone has wiped out on that one as somehow; there are no hotdogs anywhere for the first official logic break of the episode eight minutes in. (Nope; there were hotdogs there, 2010 Me.) Baloo calls out Moe on competition and demands to see the weenie raider's permit. Trader Moe, Rhino Goon and Dunder are forced to bail stage right. Baloo chuckles at that little white lie and ribs Gorilla Goon with an elbow to the ribs. (Yes folks; in Cape Suzette, there is no health inspection agency. That will change in a hurry in Pizza Pie In The Sky and Baloo is going to regret it big time.)

Kit then notices that Colonel Spigot is walking around in the park, that forces Kit and Baloo to bail stage left. Gorilla Goon follows them proclaiming that DA BOSS (FAIRY...Ooops....Wrong show) is talking funny though. (This goon is so stupid into thinking that Trader Moe and Kit Cloudkicker are the same person; just because they wear pickle outfits. Never mind that Kit and Trader Moe's face are completely different. As we'll see later on, Gorilla Goon isn't the only one fooled by this.) We cut to the Thembrian plane and see Baloo, Kit and Gorilla Goon running towards the plane and they make it safe and sound. Baloo is so happy to screw around with Spigot's mind and here comes Spigot demanding answers to this outrage. Baloo stammers as he proclaims that he was showing Dunder the new line of Cape Suzette uniforms. Riiiiiggggghhhhttttt Pop-A-Bear?! See; they are part of the Hot Dog Commandos. Eeeeewwwwwww! GET THEM AWAY! GET THEM AWAY! Kit proclaims that only an idiot would believe a story like that and Colonel Spigot of course sells the story as being true. HAHA! (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Colonel Spigot would fall for any kind of fake news. See The Time Bandit for a perfectly good example of this.) He's going to tell the High Marshal to inquire about the Hot Dog Commandos as Spigot orders Dunder to get his official Thembrian Notepad and if he doesn't sell...HE WILL BE SHOT! Colonel Spigot grabs onto the mustard bottle costume and opens it to reveal Gorilla Goon. Gorilla Goon is confused as hell as we end the segment right there nine and a half minutes in.

After the commercial break; we continue on as Spigot asks why he isn't Sergreant Dunder. Well; Gorilla Goon is an gorilla and not a warthog; that would explain why he isn't Sergeant Dunder. Gorilla Goon is still confused as hell as Colonel Spigot pulls on the bottle and orders Gorilla Goon to stop playing dumb. Kit gleefully states the obvious for me. Baloo confesses that Dunder was with him and he'll turn up because he's friendly see; as he pulls Spigot off of Gorilla Goon. Spigot gleefully blows Baloo off for me for that one. Spigot jumps off and does the POKE OF GIGGLES as Gorilla Goon proclaims that he is not supposed to tell; so he tells him that they were going to steal what was in the CHEST OF DEMONS. (And he did laugh in such a contrived matter that it is impossible to believe that he was tickled.) Gorilla Goon then catches himself and does a "say no evil" promo about ten second too late. Spigot panics like mad. Gorilla Goon ssshes them because it's a secret as Spigot runs into the plane and cannot reach the double iron safe; so he needs a step ladder and opens it which allows for boxer gloves, axes and even a machine gun to be used. OUCH! I wonder if the machine gun part was cut out by Toon Disney? (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Yup, another episode where the guns are pulled out and this isn't the last in this episode alone. Sadly, most Disney+ viewers will likely never see it.) We then see that the CHEST OF DEMONS is safe as Baloo and Kit have Gorilla Goon tied up and hung by his stomach so to speak. Spigot shuts the door and blows off Baloo and Kit for their Cape Suzette ways. (That is cold concerning Kit since most of Kit's life was never in Cape Suzette. His ways could be anything but Cape Suzette, nor Thembria. I should also note that Spigot is treating Cape Suzette like a country, despite the fact that it's a city in Usland, in which is canonal despite never showing up in name.) He orders them to find Dunder and he'll stand guard as his speech is at six o'clock and he has his pistol set to profits. Did Toon Disney cut that one out? It's going to be war if they don't make it either. (Toon Disney didn't cut out a scene gun pointing there, which is funny considering what happens in the next scene with Spigot.)

We head to a shot of a blimp as the Cape Suzette Mayor wants a big Cape Suzette hand for the Juggling Jackals of Jackomanka. The jackals are circus clown jackals on unicycles juggling pink flamingoes and people accuse the new shows for STOOPING to this crap?! We get some crashing off-screen as the crowd barely pops for that one as there seems to be only clapping from the mayor. The jackals take a bow and then leave stage right. (I believe that the jackals fell off their unicycles off-screen and then got up on the next shot.) We then pan left to see Kit and Baloo with the hotdog stand looking for Sergreant Dunder, of course. Baloo of course, calls him like a dog. We then cut over to see Rebecca seeing Baloo in the crowd looking very surprised that he delivered that piano already. She struggles stage left through the crowd and that leads to Colonel Spigot in front of Gorilla Goon marching with his pistol counting. He sucks in his count by the way. Apparently; he points his gun at something because here comes Sergeant. Dunder, Rhino Goon and Trader Moe (complete with costumes) which leads to this classic exchange which I will reveal in full because at least half of it was cut in the original due to gun pointing:

Spigot: Oh, you're back. You found my sergeant?
Moe: Sergeant? We're just your friendly neighborhood hot dog vendors!
Rhino Goon: Yeah, we're not crooks or nothin'! {Moe elbows Rhino Goon in the ribs.}
Spigot: Hot dogs? Hot dogs?! {--Spigot's gun brushes against Moe's chest--}
Moe: {Watch where you're pointing that thing, shortstop! It may be loaded!}
Spigot: {It's all right, my bullets are back in Thembria. They can't leave the country without an eleven-fourteen form, and we were all out of those.}
Moe: {Gee, that's too bad. In that case,} hand over what's in the box!
Spigot: The Golden Sprocket?! Never! {Say, you're not the kid in the pickle outfit, are you?}{--Moe points a pistol at Spigot.--}] {*gulp* Guess not...}
Moe: {We gotcha outnumbered three to one!}
Spigot: {Uh, let's not do anything *I'm* going to regret.}
Dunder: {[--Removes cap on suit.--] Hey, what're you doing to my fearless leader?} Where's Baloo?
Moe: What is this?! A bogus poupon?! Where's my other goon?! [--Spigot slaps the gun out of Moe's hand.--]
Spigot: Aha! Now it's two against two. Come on, Sergeant Dunder! Now we've got *you* outnumbered!

That was classic and sadly, much of this exchange was cut out despite the fact that the more dangerous explosion scene was not cut. (It's the old trope of dynamite being less accessible to guns and why guns are easier to mimic than dynamite. I wonder why? (Stares at the NRA.)) More so since Trader Moe is clearly seen pointing a gun after the fact. Not to mention that all the far shots they keep had Spigot and Moe pointing guns clearly for all children to see. That's why 4Kids blacklisted the Pokemon Dantrini episode completely because they knew that episode couldn't be edited out without the expense. Anyhow; we go to an upside down picture and the animators do a real good job in deception here because I thought for a minute that Colonel Spigot had won. Colonel Spigot and Dunder are tied up and hung. Colonel Spigot gets the honor of being hung upside down like Kit Cloudkicker which brings a tear to my eye. I'm one sadistic ranter. Trader Moe uses Colonel Spigot's hat to stuff into Colonel Spigot's mouth just to increase his heat. It's safe to say that Spigot is the face in this episode now as the Goons set up the hot dog cart and lights a wick rope which is connected to the TNT inside (!!!). (Also of note of Trader Moe and Rhino Goon hiding behind oil barrels which were conveniently placed out of nowhere while Gorilla Goon jumps over and does a cannonball on them.) Sadly; there is no explosion because the cart is filled with hotdogs. Would have been more apporos if we didn't see the TNT in the box BEFORE the no explosion. Logic break #2 for the episode. (Umm; nope, that's not a logic break either since that shot was shown before the switchover. Still haven't got the looking for logic breaks in the wrong places out of your system yet I see, 2010 Me.) Well; no one can be murdered on-screen so I knew it would be hotdogs in there beforehand anyway. The goon squad pops from the oil barrels of doom and goes towards the hotdog stand slowly as it smokes a bit and Trader Moe notices the weenies. Nice coloring job by the way as logic break number two is popped from the episode. (There was no logic break in the first place.) Rhino Goon gleefully states the obvious for me as he and Gorilla Goon get splattered with hotdogs by Moe.

Moe demands answers to who has his dynamite. Take one guess Moe. We go to the scene changer as Baloo and Kit are carting with the dynamite in the street and here comes the moose hotdog buyer with his right arm bandaged up and in a sling demanding a hotdog. Baloo is giddy to do business with him as he places the TNT stick into the hotdog bun, then Rebecca's voice beckons and the babyfaces bails into the trees. Rebecca arrives looking around and doesn't ask the moose for their whereabouts. Huh?! Okay; there's logic break number two for the episode right there thriteen and a half minutes in. Rebecca walks away as we see Baloo and Kit with the TNT hotdog stand talking about finding one little old sergeant. Kit points out that they lost him in the first place and wonders if he is all right. (Okay; she runs after Baloo and Kit plain as day in front of the moose furry and then on the next shot, she has to pretend that they are hiding somehow. That's the logic break 2010 Me. Not that she didn't ask the moose for their whereabouts. That made Rebecca look so stupid. At least let Baloo and Kit run around the corner to let them have enough time to hide, instead of doing a painful jump cut and have Rebecca not find them.) We head back to the airplane as the warthogs are hanging around and there is a mattress involved as Trader Moe demands answers to where the key is. Colonel Spigot refuses to talk; or would say that if the hat wasn't stuffed in his mouth. The goons go Hack & Slash on us as Moe unstuffs the hat from Spigot's mouth. Spigot takes the key, throws it into Dunder's mouth and Dunder swallows it. Spigot blows Moe off so Moe goes to his goon, they roll up their sleeves and get nasty on Spigot. Dunder calls it to the Colonel and that ends the segment right there fourteen minutes in. This episode has gone pretty well thus far. (This is basically a comedy of errors because Baloo wanted Dunder's help; and much of it is funny enough to work.)

After the commercial break; we head to the airport as a plane touches down and we see outside the gate, Baloo and Kit walking with the hotdog stand. Kit asks how they are going to tell Colonel Spigot that they couldn't find Sgt. Dunder. They walk across the bend and see the tweeners hanging around. HAHA! Kit runs in, cuts the line with his pocket knife, (That he probably stole from Don Karnage too.) the tweeners drop like flies with Colonel Spigot being a piss ant and Dunder proclaiming that he's not feeling too well all the way. (You know what; I just figured out what they did to Sergeant Dunder here: They made him vomit the key by tickling the back of his throat, making him throw up the key he swallowed minutes earlier. However; BS&P cannot show people vomitting; which is radically different than what we see in modern cartoons today.) Spigot blames it on Baloo, Kit, (twice!) and Dunder! Also, since they are all to blame for the Sprocket being stolen (which is true by the way); THEY ALL WILL BE SHOT. Except for Dunder; HE WILL BE SHOT SQUARED~! Then we hear a really bad clock chime sound effect as Spigot has a presentation because it's six o'clock. Spigot gulps in fear because he has a presentation to the mayor of Cape Suzette and if he fails to do what the High Marshall says and present the golden sprocket; HE WILL BE SHOT according to the MIRACLE WORKERS CONNECTION~! Spigot drops dead. HAHA! (Why is Colonel Spigot speaking the same dialogue twice in succession? Is there some joke that I'm not getting here?) Dunder ruins that though by proclaiming that he will not be shot because the penalty for losing international awards is being fed to polar bears. So, the High Marshal's Wife is really a descedent of Sara Palin! AHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummmmm... Spigot panics like mad because he doesn't want to go out like Grandma and pulls on Baloo's hotdog. EWWWWWW! That was more disturbing than I had intended. (Yeah; I'm amazed that this show is so blase about implying that women being fed to polar bears and little kids getting shot by Spigot's firing squad. You would think critics would have noticed this before they watched Pickle & Peanut. You would think that those two kinds of characters would be untouchable; but alas.)

I'm still wondering how the goons got the key out of Dunder's stomach? Oh wait...On second thought; I don't want to know. (Hee hee; 2010 me just remembered!) Baloo proclaims that they will find the sprocket and Spigot proclaims that he has to present it now. Baloo tells him to stall like a bunch bad wrestlers and tell a few jokes. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Dino Bravo and The Headbangers, everyone!) Spigot gets it; but his first joke dies before it gets to the runaway to cross. Ummm; yeah. Spigot of course likes the joke because it's the "Art of the State" and the state has no sense of humor. HAHA! (Now I understand why in A Gruel & Unusual Punishment that they are hostile to any type of comedian: They suck at comedy. And not just the Thembrians.) Spigot runs off and Baloo tells them to knock them dead (first death reference of the episode) as Baloo proclaims that they better hurry because it's going to be a tough audience. We head to the stage as apparently; the crowd has shrunk to about twelve people now (I guess this is a strike before Spigot does anything crappy.) as the mayor goes to the soapbox which has moved to the center of the stage now as we hear some group; (It's the Mongrilli Mimes 2010 Me.); but the goon voices drown him out as the heel appear in the foreground. Rhino goon proclaim that hiding the CHEST OF DEMONS in the hotdog stand is a great idea. Trader Moe blows off their great idea because they didn't take out the weenies first. HAHA! So here comes Rebecca from the alleyway demanding answers on the piano delivery with the clipboard as Pickle Moe wants to know who the dame is and the goons do their usual Hack & Slash routine. (I think Rebecca should have taken the hint that this was not Baloo; but she didn't for some reason.) Rebecca then does the dumbest thing she can ever do in this series: Ask what happened to Kit's voice. I'm calling logic break number three for the episode; because the face clearly shows Trader Moe and Rebecca still addresses them as Kit and Baloo even after Moe blows her off and stuffs Rebecca into the hotdog stand. (If she had said that Kit looks sick; that might have been more believable than his voice.)

I'm hearing chuckles from the "Rebecca is a bitch" meme fans right about now as the heels cart the hotdog cart away stage left as we pan over to the stage with the mayor almost calling Colonel Spigot; Colonel Drip. HAHA! How evil do you have to be to make that kind of mistake?! Anyhow; Colonel Spigot does get some clapping as Spigot arrives, stands behind the microphone stand and he's still too small to be seen. HAHA! Sadly; the crowd doesn't giggle in response to his addressing of the Cape Suzette people. He should call them Cape Suzette swine; that'll make them sell! The crowd is dead as we see Buffy & Muffy Vanderscheemer in the audience along with the pig lady from various other episodes and Teddy. I see a rhino, dog, a thembrian (who is not popping) and a black bird. When even a Thembrian outcast doesn't boo you; you are hosed as a Colonel. Also of note, if you get hosed in Cape Suzette; YOU CAN BE SHOT! He jokes about the long line in Thembria and setting his watch back an hour. HAHA! Would have been funnier if he didn't explain the time zone difference as we cut to a shot of a trolley, then down to the street with Dunder singing about getting a firing squad for him and he's honored. He thinks Colonel Spigot likes him as Kit gives Baloo a ribbing over getting Dunder in a lot of trouble as Dunder talks about getting a blindfold and Baloo finally admits that he and Kit are responsible for getting him into trouble. Baloo embraces Dunder and admits that he's a weenie because Dunder helped him like a friend and Baloo got him in hot water over all this. Dunder doesn't mind since it's only a firing squad and Baloo proclaims that he'll help Dunder get out of this stupidity. (I just love how blase Dunder is about being shot to death by the Thembrians. Something tells me that he'll get shot with food instead of bullets.) Kit proclaims that they are going to find that golden sprocket and Dunder is amazed because according to Baloo; that is what friends are for. (You know; if this were a modern cartoon; we would be screaming at the television saying that Kit and Baloo should just stay out and let the police handle it because they suck at it. Never mind that Baloo and Kit want to make up for their mistake; because accountability is such a bad word nowadays.)

We head back to the stage as Spigot has the microphone and continues to tell his Z-Grade Improv since that is the best grade that Thembrian's Art of the State is best known for. Crowd is still more dead than my sex life as we get a repeat shot from before, which is fine since it's the same reaction anyway. We head back to the suburbs as a white car drives into the garage of his house (In the 1930's? (Nope; garages existed in the first decades in the 1900's; 2010 me.)), then the furry yells, notices a piano stuck in his door and screams. He shoves it out the door and it's the same pig that destroyed the axle of the green truck earlier in the episode! The piano naturally drives itself in the street towards the city as we head to the bridge of the Friendship Festival banner as Rebecca yells for the heels to let her go stuffed in the hotdog stand; but the heels gets cornered by the MIRACLE WORKERS CONNECTION~! The chase is on and damned if I am going to call any of it because the spots are impossible to call here. Nice elbow in the face from Miss Cunningham as she unstuffs herself from the hotdog stand. She goes right through the open door trolley (!!!) and she has a pipe in her mouth; but no smoke comes out of it. (I think this is one of the few times a woman had a smoking pipe in her mouth; or was smoking. Usually; it's men who do this spot. For some unknown reason.) She also has a pink dress, flowers, a hat, a purse and a lunch pail. Don't ask why?! She screams, Moe grabs the cart, goons somehow fall into the sewer through the manhole cover, Moe falls into the trapdoor of steel doom, and the elevator rises up and Kit retakes the cart. Kit then get grabbed and stuffed into a trash can by Gorilla Goon. Scooby Doo spot follows with Rebecca screaming badly. MAN-SIZED crash off-screen and Baloo has the cart with Rebecca in tow as Baloo foolishly goes down the stairs while Dunder calls for Baloo and Baloo trips allowing the heels to retake control. So we head back to the stage as Colonel Spigot hums a tune and dances and the crowd is still dead. They have less a sense of humor than Thembria and myself combined. That's a bad sign for Cape Suzette as a town.

Oh wait; the crowd boos and throws fruit at Colonel Spigot as Spigot calls them out on throwing fruit during a friendship festival. Spigot gets nailed with an orange in his face and drops on his back with a thud. So we head to the street as WildCat walks on the sidewalk with his work tools waiting for the turn signal to turn red and the piano whizzes by stage left. The switch turns green and WildCat walks across the street. Ummm; yeah. We continue on with the hotdog stand chase as Kit uses the saw to cut the shoe store sign (And you thought Kick Buttowski was a vandal?!) and the heels miss the sign by three inches. We get a good bump from the shoe sign. Kit retakes the cart as Moe jumps up and somehow puts a plastic bag over Kit's head (!!!!) as R.J. Williams remembers to scream. I wonder if Toon Disney cut that one out? (No they didn't 2010 Me; and the bag wasn't tight on Kit's head anyway; so it wasn't going to kill him like what happened in the Urban Wrestling Federation. I should note that TBS execs panicked when Terry Funk tied a plastic bag over Ric Flair's head at a Clash Of Champions in 1990.) Funny spot: Moe retakes the cart; but Gorilla Goon drops a trashcan on Moe's head and takes the cart. (Now there's a spot that never should be retired, no matter how annoying it is. Particually if the two idiots are babyfaces.) Gorilla Goon wheels the cart as Moe blows off his goons with fury and Rebecca does the back heel kick and she has better karate moves than Drake Mallard. How bad do you have to be as a superhero when Rebecca F'NCunningham has better moves than you Drake?! Rebecca's cart races down the hill over the bridge near the fountain and down the street near the trash cans and she takes the MAN-SIZED bumps of death into them as Kit comes over to console Rebecca.

Rebecca is not all right as she crawls out from the hotdog carnage. (I just love how modern cartoons and BS&P have changed here: Nowadays, in many cartoons, they will allow any character to get crushed, smashed or suffer massive trauma; but there is a catch. The catch is that the character must inform us that they are perfectly all right. I hate that because it only encourages kids to take concussions lightly and think that they are all right. No kid; you are not all right. You have brain truama; you need a hospital visit. Now anthro characters like Chuckles The Silly Pig don't say that they are all right; but are in pain in certain parts of their bodies. I can accept that because it's funny while at the same time; they aren't really making light of the fact that the character got crushed. And at least with anthros; you can sort of believe that they are immune simply because they are chimeras. Here; Rebecca Cunningham, for the most part is all right and yet she still says that she is not. That's amazing because she wasn't hurt all that much and she still acted if she wasn't okay.) Baloo takes the CHEST OF DEMONS from Rebecca and gives it to Dunder. Dunder is giddy; but here comes Trader Moe with lighter as he lights the TNT stick with Ape Goon in tow. He demands the CHEST OF DEMONS and I suggest that his hope chest is almost gone...right...about...now. Dunder gives the chest to Moe as he cheers for victory and here comes the killer piano as everyone runs except for Dunder. Why? So he can get blown up and appear on stage with Colonel Spigot, silly. We head back to the stage as the Cape Suzette mayor struggles to get Spigot off the stage and we get an explosion as the hotdogs rain in onto the stage along with the piano, the goons (Wait; what? How? Didn't they run away from the cart?), and Sgt. Dunder. Dunder pops from inside the piano with hotdogs stuffed in his mouth. HAHA! I told you that piano was tougher than Steve Williams.

He gives the CHEST OF DEMONS to Spigot as Spigot opens it (Without a key mind you.) to reveal two more boxes and the tiniest red box allowed by law has a school lock combination (Invented in the 1900's in it's current form; but the concept dates back to the 1200's.) which Spigot breaks to reveal...wait for it...The GOLDEN SPROCKET OF THEMBRIA: A golden gear with a spring on it. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh; those wacky Thembrians; what will they think of next?! (Oh; don't say that 2010 me! I don't think my pants can take it anymore.) The mayor thanks him calling him Colonel Nozzle and Spigot corrects him, of course. The mayor proclaims that the customs of Thembria are odd. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments. (It's funny because the Thembrians took the time to create a gold-plated clock gear on a wire; and yet it probably is more valuable than most of Thembrian's crown jewels.) We head to the airport as Kit and Baloo; along with Spigot and Dunder exchange goodbyes and thanks since the High Marshall will be proud. Spigot proclaims that he's in the wrong line of work and should be in showbiz. Memo to Spigot: Don't quit your tweener job as Spigot walks into the plane. Dunder thanks Baloo for saving his ass from shooting and he'll only be flogged. How nice of him. Wink! Wink! Nudge! Nudge! Baloo apologizes for getting him in trouble in the first place. Wink! Wink! Nudge! Nudge! That leads to this awesome gem:

Kit: And we didn't sell a single hotdog Baloo.
Baloo: Well, no, but we made a lot of friends and isn't that what the Friendship Festival's all about Kit?
Kit: {Gruffi Pose on full blast.} Nice try Poppa Bear!

HAHA! I love it when Kit can see the bullcrap coming a mile away because in any other cartoon; Kit would have accepted that at face value without any question. Take that FCC approved cartoons! (Nowadays; they would just forget the moral and cause more destruction at the end; or the show takes a WTF twist like in "Two Clams In Love" from Fish Hooks. Not that this is a bad thing; but if it's not done well, it becomes a bad idea.) I think this Stephen fellow has a future in cartoon writing. (I concur; although I haven't seen his New Adventures Of Winnie The Pooh stuff yet, so he might have had it then. Of course; Baloo knows it's BS simply because he grins like he had his hand in the cookie jar.) The engines start on the Thembrian plane, we get Baloo and Kit scattering while the plane flies into the air and digs the ground a little more before taking off out of sight for good. Baloo and Kit wave goodbye as Rebecca pushes in the piano as Baloo proclaims that he was honest and he delivered it to the right address. Rebecca then admits that she got the address wrong. HAHA! Baloo is not amused to hear THAT one. (So yes; Rebecca's reason to get on Baloo's case was to inform him that she screwed up the address. Would have worked perfectly if they didn't show the big hill when Rebecca was showing where to deliver the piano in the first place.) So we see Baloo pushing the piano up the steepest hill on all of Cape Suzette and the address is at the top. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: In your face, world of Peppa Pig!) Finally, we end on this note:

Baloo: Why me, Kit? Why me?
Kit: Hey Baloo; you know what they say. It's a "dog eat dog" world! {Laughs.}
Baloo: Kit; if this piano pushing don't kill me, your jokes sure will!

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! See; make the joke and then pay it off and Kit trumps all particually the Spigot. HAHA! (Kit has incredible street creditability when it comes to that joke too; considering that he's an ex-air pirate and also a hobo as seen in "The Long Flight Home" comic. Although it would have been perfect if he said "bear eat bear" world.) We pan up to the top of the hill which the location is a church (what a shock?!) with the cross steeple covered in clouds to end the episode and disc two at 21:22. (So yes folks; religion does exist in TaleSpin, although there is also a church in The Old Man & The SeaDuck with the cross shown for all the see. Also in the comics as well.) Great first impression for Stephen. **** (80%). (No changes from me in the rating as the logic breaks are different; but the amount is the same. This was a fun, very good, fast paced comedy of errors caused by Baloo just wanting help from Dunder.)

THE REVIEW LINE

Well; we got mostly a fairly good episode with one fast paced chase sequence and lots of gun pointing and fun stuff from Colonel Spigot. A few logic breaks and some idiocy from Rebecca hurt this episode quite a bit. Kit was on task as usual along with Baloo and Dunder did very well for himself as his chemistry with being Baloo's friend worked out fairly well. The goon squad did fine and the mayor of Cape Suzette was pretty interesting early on; but became a nothing character afterward. The animation was dead on; but I still didn't like Rebecca not noticing that it was Trader Moe and not Kit in the pickle outfit. I also like the ending as it made Rebecca look foolish while still screwing over Poppa Bear and gave Kit the jokes to pay off at his expense at the end. Also; Kit's blow off of the Friendship Festival was grand because it eliminates the obvious accept the moral of the episode trait most children's cartoons show. Overall; a really good episode marred by little mistakes that could have been easily corrected. Plus; a hearty screw you to BS&P for thinking that little kids didn't notice the gun pointing in the Toon Disney version of this episode. (Well; the point is moot now that TaleSpin was released on DVD; but the peanut gallery is either too cheap or too spiteful to buy them even though they have dropped in price since they were $50 per volume when they were first released. With the exception of the third volume (and that was only because Disney refused to sell the set in Canada until they realized that the Movie Club thing was a stupid idea.); in which I paid $10 for; I paid $50 for the first two volumes apiece. The price is way down to around $15 now; and fans would rather watch them on Youtube which has the Toon Disney versions instead with no OP's or ED's. Anyhow; 2010 Me basically covered all the bases here and it was a fun episode. Sometimes, you just need to get away from the serious and let the wackiness that makes a cartoon a cartoon have it's time in the sun.) So that ends disc two of TaleSpin Volume One. This disc had six thumbs up and three in the middle. All's Whale almost got a thumbs up and Bearly Alive came dangerously close to a thumbs down. The score thus far for Volume 1: 15 thumbs up, three in the middle. Next comes disc three as I only have five episodes to rant on and next up is For A Fuel Dollars More which could be the first thumbs down episode. Or maybe not. (It ultimately wasn't; but it was dangerously close all the same.) We'll see. So...

Thumbs up for this episode and I'll see you next time.

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