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Stuck On You Re-Rant

Reviewed: 02/12/2011
Additional Commentary: 12/04/2021

...Like A Bunch of Fat Ribs!

Original Airdate: 02/12/1991 (Syndication), Episode #57 (Volume 3, Disc 1), Episode #58 (Production Order).

Stuck On You Notes
Stuck On You Transcript

Well; we march on with the old canned heat plot device as Don Karnage tries to get into Cape Suzette and actually succeeds...sort of. The episode title is actually the title of a song in 1984 by Lionel Richie and I don't know how good the song is so please don't ask me. (2016 Gregory Weagle Says: Wow; I didn't realize that even though 2011 Me wrote that; and somehow it didn't make the trivia section of the website. Anyhow; the plot is basically Don Karnage trying to invade Cape Suzette and solving the riddle; only for Baloo to screw that up causing them to somehow stick together like glue, literally. Hilarious stuff ensues. I have seen various versions of this storyline and I personally like this one the best. However; Sunwoo is animating here and they clearly were out to lunch in this one in terms of internal logic. This was one of those episodes that didn't measure up to the hype when I re-ranted on it in 2011; but transcribing it again, I was more harsh of it than I should be. Most of the Sunwoo screw ups are totally legit here; but Don Karnage has nothing to apologize for as he was carrying this episode in a figual sense and Baloo on his back literally, all in one fell swoop. That's quite a feat for someone who is supposed to be the number one heel in the group.) Let's rant on shall we...?!

This episode is written by Len Uhley. The story is edited by Jymn Magon. The animation is done by Sunwoo Animation I do believe. (It is Sunwoo; and boy did they not know what they were doing here. This is why Don Karnage is the evil miracle worker; because without him, this episode would suck.) I'll know for sure if the episode uses red flashes for the gunfire.

We begin this one with an ocean shot near the Cliff Guns as the Sky Pirates soundtrack plays in the background. We pan up to the cliff guns as we see a bulldog in a red uniform, grey pants, brown pants and grey boots invoke the binoculars in front of a wanted poster of Don Karnage. It's always nice to be wanted eh; although probably less so in this matter. ($10,000 reward for Don Karnage? Really?! The most over cool heel in the history of DTVA is only worth ten grand?! Geez; this proves that Cape Suzette doesn't really think of him as a threat. Don should have a ten million dollar bounty on his head, yes-no?!) We go to the binoculars shot as it pans right and we see the Iron Vulture attempting "Plunder Cape Suzette Plan #316" and the cliff gun commander misses it before catching himself. The furries take their battle stations which is about three of them and none of them from Jumping The Guns or wearing uniforms for logic break number one for the episode. (Actually; this makes sense when you consider that in Jumping The Guns; in storyline, the original crew was killed with mustard gas by the Air Pirates. Sadly; this does not explain how they appeared in Plunder and Lightning part four though. So no real logic break as this is clearly a post-Plunder and Lightning episode. ) The commander calls to arms before he even gets on the transmitter. That's pretty sloppy logic guys. (That's a minor gaffe compared to Sunwoo's attempt to do a dogfight above Cape Suzette harbour when most of the actual action took place in the middle or before they reached the cliff guns.) The cliff guns get a closeup as the cliff gun commander (don't know his voice sadly.) proclaims that Don Karnage will never get past the cannons and calls him a thief. Ummm; BS&P strikes again. (Yeah; they are terrorists; but I guess this falls under the "Don't embolden the heel" as if being called a terrorist turns him babyface somehow. You would think that his personality alone would be a huge problem, but alas.)

The cliff guns fire and the Iron Vulture wisely stays in a position where the bullets don't even reach it. We head into the cockpit as Don Karnage swears in DUBBED ANIME STYLE ("Sons of hamsters!" HAHA!) because this is what happens when they put a reward on Don Karnage. (This joke actually works considering that their plan is actually working. Yes; they have solved the mystery of getting past the cliff guns: Just simply fly over them from a height that makes the bullets hyperbole and miss completely.) We then see Mad Dog, Gibber and Dumptruck arrive as Mad Dog does his usual promo which is to whine about the gunfire. Don Karnage invokes the binoculars as the animation wind effects are in effect. The bullets are missing the Iron Vulture and Don mocks gleefully. Mad Dog notices that the bullets are firing into the city. WHAT? That makes no sense whatsoever because the shells are fired away from the city in the first place; not into the city. Logic break number two for the episode barely a minute in. I sense this is an off day for Len Uhley, today. (Yeah; but it's not really Len's fault here because the animation continuity was way off in the first seven or eight minutes of the episode. The animation itself was perfectly fine; it was the background and positioning of the animation that sucked. For instance, the commander even teleports from one side on green grass and looking at Higher For Hire to back to the bunker literally on the next shot. This makes no sense. Also; half of the dogfighting takes place over Cape Suzette when the firing took place outside of it. The internal logic of these first five minutes or so was completely off and Sunwoo's logic streak doesn't end with just this dogfight.) The commander calls for a cease fire and then blows off Don Karnage remembering to pump his fist in feined outrage. Look; the whole "go over the cliff guns thingy" is a great idea and Don was taking notes to the finish in My Fair Baloo, but the bullets should not have bounced into the city. (Yeah; Walt Disney Animation Japan should have done this episode; at least they would have kept this straight.)

We cut to the mouth of the Iron Vulture as Don Karnage gets into his single manned balloon. See; Don wants to make the grand entrance into the city to make his demands for the city of Cape Suzette to surrender. I see the Drake Mallard genes are infecting him this time. (Yeah; because using the radio is not cool, and he remembers that the last time he used the PA system, no one sold his demands, causing him to fire the Lightning Gun into buildings. It's not a Bubsy thing, honest!) Gibber whispers in his ear the second time around calling him crazy. (Probably the only time Gibber actually spoke a word out loud and this was why Gibber almost never speaks. He just pushed one of Don Karnage's berserk buttons. Yes; there is a second berserk button that is worse than being called crazy.) Don grabs Gibber by the coat ordering him not to call him that word. This becomes a running theme for this episode; and Don has a point. Compared to Kit Cloudkicker; he's pretty sane albeit vain. POW! OUCH! Hey... Don Karnage drops Gibber like a bad habit and tells Dumptruck that he is in charge of the operation and Dumptruck sells it by jabbing the telescope right into his right eye. HAHA! I betcha Mad Dog is whining in his beer over that one somewhere. ("Geez; I should've put my eye out with the telescope; I probably would have got the job. Wah!". But then who would play the bump machine? DTVA laws states that you cannot play captain and bump machine at the same time. In fact; we find out why it's not a good idea to do both at the same time.) Don reaction is downright priceless too before he catches himself and orders the balloon to be deattached. Mad Dog has controls of the levers (JESUS~!) and sadly; Don Karnage gets dropped as the pulley nails him in the head with a sick MAN-SIZED bump and Don Karnage gets WARNERED~! Well; sort of as he tears the basket with his body shape on the way down. (Not only that; but Sunwoo wacky animating made it appear that the basket was going to freefall when it didn't.)

Wow; he's auditioning for Darkwing Duck already. Too bad only his voice made it. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh well; there's always the cameo for Raw Toonage. (Which is the epitome of a Z-grade show in DTVA. You can't tell me Eisner didn't have it out on this show. I won't believe you for a second. Way too much evidence. Anyhow; this is yet another episode where the execs told the writers to be cartoony because we don't want kids to think that they should just do this live-action. At least now that Zootopia has demonstrated that you don't have to resort to that crap to get over; it shows how petty some people really are in hindsight. Len Uhley was a lot more subtle than Cathryn Perdue here though.) Mad Dog has that look of: "He's going to MURDER me after this is over." I think Eisner beat him to the punch on that one my whiny friend. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Well, there is that Bygones episode still left in the television can...) Don pops up, spits some basket particles out to amuse me and he is wearing the flight goggles which is wimpy since I only saw Kit do this once in the entire series while in the air in The Idol Rich.(No; he wore them in Plunder and Lightning and Bullethead Baloo. So it's not wimpy.) Don blows off the goons because he wants to be lowered gently. We head into the skies somewhere else as the SeaDuck is flying towards Cape Suzette as Baloo is flying the SeaDuck with his feet while doing sounds with the soda bottle while singing his version of "She'll Be Coming Around The Mountain". ("He'll Be Flying Lots Of Cargo" by the way.) This commits logic break number three as the bottle instantly empties. Well; there goes the perfect episode right there folks barely three minutes in. (All they had to do here is have Baloo make gulping noises off-screen in one of the shots instead of blowing the bottle. It's so simple and the sound editing team didn't notice it.)

It's from Lock Lein to Port Largo according to Baloo. (Fans had it as Locklyn; which makes little sense since Lock Lein is a play on Loch Lein/Lough Leane which is a lake in Ireland, so this was supposed to be an Irish reference. There is a Port Largo in real life as a vacation resorts in Key Largo, Florida.) Baloo sees a storm brewing and he races forward with the flight stick. We cut back to Don Karnage floating down gently as he stumbles and fumbles on what kind of speech he is going to say to the denizens of Cape Suzette when he plunders the city. (Mainly because the first choice sounded like a generic person saying it correctly and we all know Don is a master tormenter of many languages. He's also a cool heel.) Don then wants to know what is making that motor noise as we cut back to the cockpit of the SeaDuck as the thunder claps and the soda bottle fills up again. Baloo probably found another one in between the scenes to replace the empty one so no logic break there. (Fair enough. He had lots of time to find another bottle and we know he keeps more than one.) So the bottle drops on cue and Baloo goes for it as the SeaDuck literally runs over Don Karnage allowing Don to take some really nasty bumps in the process over the roof of the Seaduck before attaching itself to the back of the tailsection. HA! (Oh; almost forgot to add this: Don Karnage cuts almost the same promo Kick Buttowski cut in Deadman's Drop when Kick was bouncing off stuff: When he bounces off the roof of the SeaDuck; he says: A-E-I-O-U. Kick says the same thing; but adds "Sometimes Y" to the mix. In the English language; there are fourteen to twenty vowels depending on the mood of the speaker was in.) Mad Dog and company raise the pulley and they are shocked as only Don Karnage's goggles are on the hook...somehow, thus justifying him wearing them in the first place.

Good thing Len Uhley was on the ball there, eh?! (This would have been a great spot if he wasn't wearing them over his eyes; this creating a situation where the goggles are magically gone from his face. Another Sunwoo mistake that should have been corrected. Besides; you don't need the goggles to make this work anyway since the lack of balloon basket would have gotten the job done.) Mad Dog then notices Don Karnage on the binoculars and proclaims that Baloo commited avaitional homicide on the beloved captain! No; not really, but close enough. (I just hear Jim Ross right now: "Oh my God! That plane just ran over Karnage! That plane just ran over Karnage!") Dumptruck stammers and then calls the troops to attack as the Iron Vulture lowers down to ground level which I believe is their fatal error right there. (It ultimately was; but it took a while before that happened.) However; we cut to Baloo in the back checking the cargo and notices nothing of note. Then he hears knocks on the side door. Baloo foolishly goes over and opens it; which allows him to get kicked in the chest by Don Karnage. (Oh; and Bubsy stole this spot in his pilot in the sense of the door opening before Baloo had a chance to even open it. Can someone explain to me why the person is not allowed to open the door? If it's BS&P saying "Well, we cannot have them open doors because it's too violent." Even though the violent act still happens when Don Karnage kicked Baloo in the chest. If it's because it's funny; wouldn't it be funnier if Baloo opened the door first like an idiot? At least here; Baloo doesn't know who's knocking on the door; so it's natural that he would do something like this. Even smart people would have fallen for it.) Wussy bump ensues as Don unleashes the regal cutlass and cuts a promo that doesn't subvert grammer in anyway. (Something tells me that one was not ab-libbed. Although him saying that "I'll teach you to hit my bucket!" pretty much confirms that he's accusing Baloo of trying to murder him legit.)

He IS losing his touch as Baloo backs away to the conveniently placed trash can and gets his ass stuffed. Okay; that was pretty funny; but it's out of nowhere and pretty much goes the same place. Baloo grabs the trashcan lid (The shield of choice in TaleSpin as shown in Bringing Down Babyface.) and blocks the sword shots. Don is pissed off for Baloo almost MURDERING him there and Baloo asks what he did. Oh; I don't know; you almost committed vechicular homicide on the most over heel in TaleSpin. (Yeah; it wasn't on purpose, mind you; like what happened to Steve Austin when Billy Gunn...ERRR..I mean...Rakishi...ERRR...I mean, Triple H ran him over with the car. But you were still stupid enough to not see where you are going just to get back your orange soda bottle. You wonder why Don Karnage is pissed off?! You wonder why people were cheering for Don to kill that fatass sloth bear?!) Then the thunderclaps invoke the power of suggestion to rock the SeaDuck around. Don and Baloo bounce right out of the conveniently opened tailsection of the SeaDuck as I'm calling logic break number four for the episode right there. (Not really; Don and Baloo lost their balance and they tumbled towards the tailsection door. How the tailsection door opened without using the switch is the bigger flaw than them getting to the door since the door was actually closed. It's a minor logic break compared to Sunwoo's laughable attempt to have a dogfight over the Cliff guns.) Baloo hangs onto the door and the males panic as we get a sky shot of the ground below. (I don't recall this shot happening when I was transcribing it.) Don manages to climb over Baloo. Don make it onto the door and has his regal cutlass set to profits because he is going to MURDER Baloo right there.

(Here's a moment where doing transcripts paid off: The subvertion of "Never Say God" strikes again as Don is climbing over Baloo and he says "Oh my Godddd!"; and probably hating life too. So far; the "god" counter is at three for this seires and Don will say it again in Ransom Of The Red Chimp (the only one Disney Captions actually confirmed it existed). So thanks to me listening to the audio and doing transcripts, we have four god references in this series. I don't think even Ducktales had that many references to god. Rescue Rangers and Darkwing Duck had more references to god than TaleSpin did; but only once did they use it in vain. I haven't seen all of Gargoyles yet, but I counted only one god in vain reference; while TaleSpin had even one from Kit Cloudkicker of all people.) Baloo might be the least over; but he is still pretty over as a babyface. If this was the Aussie Stereotype; then you know. (Baloo is a really likable character in his role as a manchild because the booking allows Baloo to show off his humanity when he absolutely requires it. It's also a real and believable character because it's (and I hate to use the term here) as relatable to many adults as you are going to get. The thing is; because everyone in TaleSpin has unique personalities and most of them are among the most likable (and in the case of Don Karnage and Kit; lovable) like Rebecca, WildCat, Molly among others that they run rings around Baloo. I love these characters a lot more than Baloo regardless if it's from the real jungle nor the concrete jungle. So does Shere Khan and even Louie to a much lesser extent. However; understand that Michael Eisner's business model for DTVA was to milk the classic characters, not make new stars. So regardless if the new characters get so over that they earned their position; the glass ceiling stops them from being elevated further. That why TaleSpin was such a tragedy: They had everything right in front of them to make a serious run towards a long term series; but politics and Eisner's models killed it, thus it became nothing but filler to them. If TaleSpin somehow gets rebooted, I hope it doesn't suffer from "rush job" syndrome; and I hope it doesn't suffer from Eisner model syndrome either; because TaleSpin needs closure that isn't from a fanboy's prespective.)

Baloo blows him off and dares him to kill him right there; thus be the big crowd that he is. Don raises his sword, then stops and then helps Baloo up. Oh; that wasn't contrived in the very least, no siree Len. I club BS&P! (Wow 2011 me; you completely missed the point of the whole thing: Baloo was calling his bluff and basically accusing Don of being a cowardly heel. Don then stops and for a moment actually helps Baloo up because Don Karnage wants to beat him; but he'll kill Baloo when Baloo does have the ability to fight back. It's a rare show of humanity (and whatever twisted honor Don Karnage believes) on Don's part; and Baloo's reaction is amazing. The thing is; despite Don Karnage being a cool monster heel; even a scoiopath can have flashes of humanity even when it doesn't benefit him. The scene with Kit in the cave in Plunder and Lightning Part III was more so to benefit him. Don Karnage would rather taste Baloo's wrath here because then it's a face-to-face battle and he's confident enough to win that. This is a rare moment where you can tell who's brilliant writing is showing here and this is one of the reasons why Len Uhley earned that Writers Guild Of America award after all these years of being a writer.) Baloo and Don Karnage tumble into the back of the SeaDuck as Baloo cannot believe that Don saved his life. Don cannot believe it either; so at least he's as confused as I am. (Well; 2011 me anyway was confused. Thank you Kevin Johnston for clearing up the confusion for me.) Then he pounces on Baloo as Baloo bounces in front of the conveninetly placed colored barrels of something in a net. Don stalks Baloo as he has won fair and square in the killing department and swings his sword. However; Baloo bails and Don cuts the net allowing the barrels to shake, Baloo tackles Don Karnage down onto the ground and Baloo gets on top of him as some white stuff drops onto the males. HOLY CRAP!

That position they are in and the white glue on them is not a good combo for the Southern Baptists. I think Kit Cloudkicker has been cleared on all charges here. (Someone on the internet claimed that the super glue represented seamen; even though it clearly was not. I find it interesting later on when I mentioned the position of anal sex which I completely missed in the transcript. Ironically; the most horrifying position in this show goes to Rebecca and her face slamming into the ass of Hogzilla in The Bigger They Are, The Louder they Oink.) Don blows off Baloo as he wants the fatass off and Baloo agrees with him; but they are stuck together like a bunch of fat ribs does to my tummy. They try some attempts to separate but no dice. For those who ask why they don't take their clothes off: It wouldn't matter. The glue is also stuck to their skin as well; so that is pointless. It's super glue so it's going to stick good. Yes; this episode does have some gaping flaws; but the two major ones in question by the fans are NOT present here. (There is another major point as to why it wouldn't matter: If you entertain the thought that they can take their clothes off; do you realize that they would be naked for the rest of the episode. Now granted; Baloo is already nude from the waist down; but Don Karnage isn't (except in certain PR materials because PR was too busy bashing Bugs Bunny (which is comical considering that Eisner originally thought Disney owned Bugs Bunny.).). Now if this were booked today; I betcha that someone would apease the critics and have them take off their clothes completely. The problem is; then you spent twenty or so minutes with them naked like Timmy Turner being teleported over to the store nude. You are playing BS&P roulette here; and it's not a pretty sight. If you want to complain about a logic hole: How about Baloo standing on glue and moving away from the glue without having it stick to the soles of Baloo's feet when he goes to the cockpit. That's a bigger logic hole than them not taking their clothes off.)

Oh and at 5:54 of the video; it does look like Baloo and Don are in position to have anal sex. Wow; just wow. As much as I think nukunukufu is a bigoted piece of crap; Sunwoo's animating does not do this episode ANY favors. See the tickling scene in Polly Wants A Treasure. (Almost forgot that one with the feather in Kit's groin moment. It was unintentional and Sunwoo being Sunwoo in terms of being hilariously botchery. Also, Baloo taking a beak to the groin in Bullethead Baloo was a classic and a half. There is also Rebecca taking her face into a pig's ass in The Bigger They Are, The Louder They Oink, too) Anyhow; Baloo goes to the barrels as he wants to start thinking instead of fighting and Don blows him off. Baloo notices the phone number on the paper and then proclaims that they have to go to Cape Suzette to talk to Rebecca. Don blows it off and takes a sick bump into the door edge heading into the cockpit because the glue fumes are making Baloo dopey in the head. Wow; three sexual crap past the radar and a drug reference to boot! And the Acorn Cafe claims Rescue Rangers is the most adult show in DTVA?! Methinks this show and Gargoyles would like to have a word with them. (Don't forget the religious references too.) Anyhow; Don does have a point since if he's discovered then he'll be in jail because Rebecca (Annoying boss type lady according to him...) will turn him in for the reward. (Geez; I wonder why? I mean, she was kidnapped twice by them in this show.) Baloo gets a smile and Don blows him off for that because he saved his life see. Don has a point there Pop-A-Bear. (So Baloo is told not to turn him in because he saved Baloo's life despite the fact that moments later; Don tackles him and tries to kill him. Ah; the wonders of selective memory. Besides; it's not like Baloo didn't have this coming. I mean; Baloo almost killed him with the SeaDuck early on in this very episode!)

Baloo then turns it around and asks if he has a better plan as the Iron Vulture starts firing on the SeaDuck. Ah; the red flashes indicate that Sunwoo Animation is animating today without question now. I can breathe easier now. (Yup. Although Sunwoo is too lazy to show a few seconds of the Iron Vulture cannons firing here.) Don uses an iron (!!! (Actually; it's a sandpaper block shaped like an iron. Very odd in this time period.)) to do his nails as Baloo is piloting and Don wants Baloo to go close to the Iron Vulture. Baloo no sells because he'll be ripped apart. Don assures him that once they see him attached to Baloo; then they will ceasefire and he's a man of honor. (Riiigggghhhtttt. The most hilariously dumb pirate crew in the history of pirate crews is going to restrain themselves from killing Baloo just because he's stuck to Don Karnage. As we will see later; Don Karnage's arrogrance coupled with Baloo screwing up everything shows that Baloo was right all along about them.) Baloo chuckles and blows that one off as the two males argue while the Iron Vulture continues to shoot from the bottom cannons. Don wonders why they are firing and Baloo gleefully points out the obvious as Don tries to go for the transmitter; but drops it as apparently the transmitter got shot down despite us not seeing the bullets nor hearing them. (We didn't see the bullet; but I heard the gunfire in the transcript; so it's not as bad as you claim it is 2011 me.) Bad form there guys. Don panics like mad to make up for it and thus make the logic break even more obvious. We see the SeaDuck sprialing down towards the cliff guns as the cliff gun captain has the binoculars on as we get scum reference number two for the series, the cliff guns fire red flashes and we see the bullet shells everywhere as we are easily at 1.0 Trigun at this point. (Again; the animation should show them flying over the Cliff Guns and not have the bullets flying over Cape Suzette harbour. This is just a mess here.)

The Seaduck flies down into the fire as Baloo and Don struggle some more for fun. Sadly; the Iron Vulture is now too low which is helpfully pointed out by Mad Dog. Dumptruck no-sells stating that Don Karnage put him in charge of DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!). However; the Iron Vulture get pounded by gunfire and Dumptruck decides to retreat as he screams into Gibber's ear. Funny stuff as the Iron Vulture makes retreat #3290. (Basically; it was Mad Dog demanding that they retreat; Dumptruck blows him off because he is in charge; but still takes it as a good suggestion, then he screams into Gibber's ear.) The SeaDuck then takes a MAN-SIZED bump into the water and bops above the surface floating the wrong way against the docks of Higher For Hire. Don Karnage and Baloo continue to complain about the landing as a fish is stuck in the windshield. Heh; a fish out of water indeed. Just like Fish Hooks is half of the time. (Finally; the first segment ends after seven minutes of a segment that was pretty good in terms of storyline and animation; but the logic and continuity were all over the place. This is still better than your average seven minute TNA Knockouts brawl on Impact!) We get the clock scene changer (first one at 7:54!) as we head to the door to the office of Higher...For...Hire as Baloo is covered with a blanket with Don Karnage on his back. Don Karnage orders Baloo not to blow his cover because Baloo has honor see. Baloo agrees to it as long as Don Karnage doesn't screw it up. Remember that one for later. (Yeah; because as you will see, Baloo's screw ups were a million times more obvious than Don Karnage's screw ups.) Don Karnage ducks into the blanket becoming himself a master of something I cannot put my thumb on, Baloo opens the door and heads inside. (Don Karnage said that he's a master of stealth; which is comical in itself considering that he's too full of himself to pull it off; and yet when it comes to stealth, he's still more effective at it than Baloo is as you will see later on.)

Baloo tries to greet; but no one seems to be in the office and then we see Rebecca with a safari hat and WildCat in the filing cabinet with a flower pot on his head. Rebecca goes around Baloo as he calls the place a disaster despite the fact that the office is completely clean as a whistle for logic break nuimber five for the episode. (Why wasn't this line redubbed to "This was horrible!"?! That's twice now that they made Baloo look absolutely stupid for no reason; as per the Burt/Bart thing in Mach One For The Gipper.) Rebecca thanks the heavens (Religious reference number one for the episode...) that the kids were not here. So where the hell are they Rebecca?! Probably playing their usual games; or they are at the apartment having the off-screen tickle fight I want to see. I cannot understand Len Uhley nor Jymn Magon sometimes. (I just picture this rebooted as two different subplots; with the secondary plot being Kit and Molly at Rebecca's apartment tickling the snot out of each other. They don't have to go eleven minutes; they can get five or six minutes out of this. It would certainly help pad out some of the more pointless moments of this episode. That's how I would book Kit into this episode. Although; as I mentioned before, R.J. Williams was moonlighting as Cavin at this point; so they couldn't pencil him into this episode and Bygones. Paradise Lost is fine without Kit in it as long as you redub Baloo's lines about getting back the SeaDuck; which shows that Jeffrey Scott has no idea what he was doing.) Rebecca calls Don a rat, blows him off for trying to plunder Cape Suzette and then notices that Baloo is putting on extra weight.

Baloo admits that he has some extra fat while stammering around. Jeepers; more usage of the politically incorrect word fat. (Sigh 2011 me. Although there are some who are wanting people to stop using the word fat in an insulting context, even though "fat" is a real thing that is measurable through science and medicine. Much more difficult to jettison just like that, then toxic words towards women and racist words against minorites.) Baloo goes over and crushes Don's mouth as he wants to turn him in right now; but Don blows him off and proclaims that he promised see. I love this chess game; if only Sunwoo didn't screw it up. (Here's the issue with this: What will be the consequences of Baloo snitching him out right now? Because; snitching him out now would avoid Baloo being an accessory to obstructing justice anyway. I'm sure the police would find a way to unstuck these two and probably do it much faster. But of course; if that happened the series would be over because Don Karnage is the most popular character on the show and having it end like that would make the show jump the shark. I mean; if you are going to replace your number one heel; you need to do such an epic send off in the sense that you almost have to have Karnage killed outright on screen to make it work. Otherwise; people will see it as going out with a whimper instead of a bang like Don has earned here. So,therefore; Baloo has to be an idiot and keep Don under wraps. Jeepers; that took about thirty seconds to figure out why. No wonder no one noticed it but me.) Rebecca asks who Baloo is talking to and Baloo claims that it's an itch and he was talking it away. There's quackery; and then there's QUACKERY.

WildCat believes in the woo too, as he notices Don Karnage's tail. Which is silly considering that Disney never seems to keep that straight. Then again; I think Don's a hybrid of wolf and fox; so what do I know? (He's a red wolf 2011 me. The hybrid joke is over now and Jymn got it right. Sometimes the "Word Of God" is right. Sometimes.) Baloo manages to grab the tail and stuff it into the blanket. (No; Don Karnage grabbed the tail himself.) Rebecca asks why he is wearing a blanket. The best answer would be to Louie's Halloween Ball; but Baloo goes for the cold card and does a fake sneeze to force the point. (Yeah; because that would be believable in Rebecca's eyes since Baloo is friends with that crude matted ball of fur and seeing him as a ghost would make the connection even more obvious. Here; Rebecca would have noticed that something was up; so Baloo is basically loading ammunition here in Miss Cunningham's favor.) Baloo then backs up and goes to the closet as he wants to use the phone and Rebecca offers Baloo the office phone; but Baloo insists in using the closet phone (!!). Baloo slams the door as Rebecca tells him to finish his call and go to bed because she cannot have her only pilot getting sick. I thought she got over that after Bearly Alive?! (Ummm; I see that Feminine Air has basically assured her that Baloo would be her pilot for a long while. At least until Kit Cloudkicker gets his pilot license. Which by then would probably mean the relationship might become more than just being friends. Personally; I don't care either way at this point, just as long as they learn from each other how to get along.) Anyhow; we head into the closet as Baloo opens the blanket a bit and Don continues to mock Baloo (Something about chicken soup; so even he's not buying Baloo's white lying here. Should have went for the Louie's Halloween Party thing, Pop-A-Bear.) leading to this classic exchange:

Baloo: Shh! You wanna tip off Rebecca?!
Don Karnage: {With Rebecca watching on.} No. I want to bump off Rebecca.

Oooooo...Don is saying that he wants to kill Rebecca; but it sounds too much like he wants to have sex with Rebecca in roundabout terms. This makes all the feet references in Polly Wants A Treasure look high class. Again; how can the Acorn Cafe sleep at night sometimes? (Geez; they had me at WildCat shaking Rebecca's hand with his poop soaked hand in Plunder and Lightning Part 2. Again; why does everyone assume that Disney was ever squeaky clean?! I mean; Ed Gilbert got away with saying "fucking" on this show for god sakes. Granted; they would have edited it out; but they didn't. Why?! I don't know. Never attribute something to malice when it can be explained away by sheer incompetence. Here's the Link to the whole Acorn Cafe deal and if I feel like it; I'll update it after I finished the celebration. Wiggles and company are such high comedy.) Rebecca opens the door (I see WildCat got rid of the flowerpot...) as Baloo has his front covered with the blanket as Rebecca wonders about hearing someone and then just waves it off and leaves closing the door. Baloo takes the blanket off and Don calls Rebecca nosy. (I'm shocked you didn't add: I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments there 2011 Me. Geez; I'm starting to lose my touch as much as Nintendo is right now.) Baloo then calls Don crazy and Don's reaction is downright priceless as he blows off Baloo for using that word. So Baloo uses it again and Don really blows him off and they has another pointless struggle to get the glue off; but no dice. So why not use the sword? I believe Don either lost the sword earlier before they went into the glue; and the super glue would have stuck to that as well. (Yeah; he lost it when Baloo tackled Don Karnage down. I'm just amazed that no one considered that as an logic hole than 2011 me; and even then realized that it sucked. Never accuse either of us of not thinking anything through, that is for certain.) Baloo and Don hide behind the boxes as Rebecca hears more noises from outside and walks into the closet wanting answers.

We then see Don's arm literally trying to choke Baloo out; but Baloo maintains control. (What is this about wringing necks that is supposed to be illegal in DTVA?! Remember that there is no BS&P censor other than the ones making the production themselves, so it's mostly self-control than censorship. The fact that no one can tell the difference anymore tells me that the word censorship is about as pointless as the phrase politically (in)correct is now.) Baloo proclaims that he's all right as Don does the arm signals to amuse me (which look similar to jazz hands), Rebecca shakes her head and slams the door shut this time around. Uh Oh! Rebecca's pissed off now as she proclaims that someone needs their head examined and WildCat gleefully answers that one for me allowing Rebecca to look like she wants to be somewhere else. (So yes; WildCat just admitted that he took Rebecca's advice from Bearly Alive and got therapy. I'm guessing the therapist decided that WildCat was himself and didn't need anything other than acceptance.) Probably to get Molly off of Kit after Kit loses the tickle fight. (Are you kidding, 2011 Me?! You expect that kind of mercy from her?!) We see Baloo walk away from the crates stage left -- with Don Karnage in tow of course -- towards the phone to the glue factory as he posts the paper on the wall (I guess it was super glued too). Baloo apparently doesn't want to go to the loony bin. Somehow; he's already there. (Well in Rebecca's eyes anyway. Doctor Phil would be pulling out all of his remaining hair with this family at the rate they are going.) We then head to inside a lab as an almost absolute dead ringer to Bugs Bunny -- wearing a lab coat and glasses -- is on the red phone with a glue filled brush. For those who complain about Fanboy & Chum Chum ripping off Star Wars; the TaleSpin critics would like to have a word for you. (Well; just me and Steet anyway.)

For that IMDB reviewer who hated hearing a virtual pet telling Fanboy to "go suck an egg"; watch Whiffle While You Work from Darkwing Duck and get the “new shows always suck” nut out of your head. (I'm surprised you didn't go all the way here and point out that he looks like Bugs Bunny crossed with exec thinking of making Baloo blue in Jungle Book 2; just so kids could see him and such stuff. Even funnier; I swear that he looks like Buster Bunny's dad. Only he's voiced by Pat Fraley and not Charlie Adler despite the fact that Charlie Adler voices Mad Dog in this very episode! Copyright: It sucks! As far as the "go suck an egg thing"; this is why you take copious notes when reviewing an episode; and this is partally why I'm doing transcripts, because then I don't miss stuff that my rose-colored glasses filter would conveniently thrown out. Also known as my memory, I should note.) He also sounds like the poor man's WildCat (Pat Fraley) as he calls it a sticky situation. No glue on you, Sherlock! (In the same context as no fleas on Webby in Ducktales.) We cut to Baloo wanting him to cut the jokes and tell him how to get the stuff off. We then go to the split screen as the Bugs Bunny (Buster Bunny's Dad. The fact that Buster admits that Bugs is not his dad lends creditibility to my theory.) scientist tells him that the super glue is a stick all glue (Which destroys all the obvious logic breaks critics outside of me are pointing out.) which can be removed with a chemical bath. Oh goody; if that were Mike Adams, he would enjoy staying stuck with Baloo and try his best to make sure Baloo doesn't arrive by six o'clock when the glue becomes permanent. (Even more obvious when later on, Buster Bunny's Dad proclaims that they never tested it on people before. More on that later because there's something hilarious about this line that I just figured out while doing this additional commentary stuff.)

Don isn't liking this as the Bugs Bunny Doctor proclaims that in the glue business, "haste makes paste". (I see violating Anime Conduct Rule number twelve (Thou Shalt Not Rhyme. Because it's COOL!) is also a promo in the glue sniffing/glue making business. Well; the later one mostly. ) Baloo puts on the blanket again and Don is with him all the way as they come out of the closet as Baloo wants to leave; but Rebecca has the keys and looks coy. Huh? How the hell did she get the keys?! Logic break number six for the episode; and the first one I don't accept. By the way; this shot proves that this is a second run syndication episode because in the first run; the shot as zoomed in and Rebecca was doing a much different pose. (I just realized something; Rebecca teleported from in front of Baloo to in front of her desk at one point when Baloo came in; so I'm guessing that she got the keys when they cut to a closeup of WildCat. It would have been easier if they just showed her taking the keys while Baloo was talking and show Baloo handing the keys like a complete moron. Still the worst logic break of Act I. At least the Sunwoo logic breaks in the first seven minutes was all on Sunwoo since the dogfight itself was animated well and the booking was good; but this logic break was mostly caused by Len forgetting to book Rebecca taking the keys from Baloo. DUMB!) Baloo realizes that he is had as Rebecca wants to know what's wrong and Baloo won't bite. Rebecca backs him up the stairs and into his room. Rebecca orders him that he's staying in his bedroom until he tells Rebecca what is wrong with him. She slams the door and we go to a shot of the cuckoo clock reading four o'clock meaning there is only two hours left as we end the segment nearly 11 1/2 minutes in. (It's three o'clock so they actually had three hours left. It even says so in the Toon Disney version which is the version you watched five years ago. How could 2011 me miss that?! Another reason I am doing transcripts.) Six logic breaks in this first segment?! Wow; just wow Len. (Actually; looking back, there was only four logic breaks in this episode; but that is still an off day by Len Uhley's lofty standards on this show. Although most of that can be put at the feet of Sunwoo Animation.) It is just over just by sheer force of will. (Don Karnage being awesome and funny almost assures a thumbs in the middle pointing up episode and that's what it's has been so far.)

After the commercial break; we head to the Iron Vulture in a thunderstorm and then we cut to the "Pirate's Rectangle Table". The entire Air Pirate squad is literally pigging out on the feast. (All thirteen of them I might add.) Then we see Mad Dog tapping on a glass and the sound effects guys screw up because we hear no glass sound effect during that sequence. Oh lord; why do you test me so?! (This seems to happen about five percent of the time like Dave The Barbarian does from time to time. Still better average than Chargeman Ken which is at a 90% clip.) Mad Dog puts his hat over his heart, wants a moment of silence for their brave Captain, the group actually sells for about three seconds before sitting back down and throwing food around like gunfire. Heh. (Now that was funny in the context that they gave him a moment of silence that was equal to the exec's mind of a children's attention span being like a "goldfish" (Scare quotes intentional because goldfish have attention spans of at least seven months.). This is like the old analogy of kids being like little puppies in terms of being sentient. It's insulting and belittles children who are human beings. Stop it! Most kids today have attention spans better than me. Heck; look at how they can absorb technology and ideas well compared to me. They remember things I would forget twenty minutes later.) Gibber whispers something in Dumptruck's ear as Dumptruck uses a spoon to tap the glass and the crack sound team actually remembers to insert the proper sound effect this time. (I just love how Gibber is controlling Dumptruck here even though Dumptruck is supposed to be in charge here. This is like Kenny King accepting a eight man tag with first blood rules overruling MVP on Impact! At least this amuses me than that debacle that made Chico Alverez quit Impact for a month.) The pirates no sell him, so he breaks the glass right in his hand with no blood whatsoever. Damn; I was hoping for the censors to allow blood just for this one time and the pirates still no sell.

Then we jump cut to the pirates stopping their food fight. (Yeah; something was cut here and it wasn't Dumptruck's hand. They did allow Kit to be cut with a potato peeler in Flight School; but there was no blood there and they used far shots, so it would have been difficult to see it anyway.) I should point out that I am watching the Toon Disney edit and not the UK version (Which is on my crappy VHS tapes provided by someone who was tape trading with me. No; it wasn't Laura Trombley by the way.). The UK (and DVD) version shows Dumptruck going for his gun and shooting at the ceiling with it. I find this cut silly since Gibber does the same thing in Plunder and Lightning Part One and Toon Disney didn't cut that. You can clearly tell it's cut because Dumptruck is about to go for his gun and then we cut away to the pirates reaction. (Not only did they cut the gun shooting; they also cut out Dumptruck talking gibberish in his Swedish accent; and I made the big mistake of transcribing what he said. If you read the transcript and think that I have lost my mind; I'm sorry, that's how it sounded to me. I never seen to learn my lesson after transcribing Louie's scat song from For Whom The Bell Klangs. I'm turning into a children's cartoon now. That's goofy.) Moving right along; Dumptruck proclaims that Don Karnage is kaput and he nominates himself as the captain of the Air Pirates since the original successor Kit Cloudkicker turned on them at least fifty episodes ago. (Okay; he didn't say anything about Kit; but come on, no one can be this stupid and think Don Karnage wasn't trying to groom Kit to be a successor. After all; Kit's IQ was much more than all of the sky pirates combined. Too bad Kit had much more humanity than all the pirates combined. So much so; that Don Karnage has been embarrassed to the point where he doesn't want to remember his feud with Kit.)

Mad Dog finally protests this, so Dumptruck grabs him by the throat and chokes him. (Where is this rule that wringing of the necks is a no-no in DTVA? Outside of the health inspector in Pizza Pie In The Sky; and that was cut because he was choked out with this tie and it was used as a noose. Same thing with Kit Cloudkicker in All's Whale That Ends Whale.) Mad Dog chokes on that (Slapnuts! Couldn't resist a Jeff Jarrett joke there. Puppet is going to shun me now.) and agrees to second Dumptruck, of course. Then we see WildCat in the office sweeping the floor with the broom. Rebecca is on the phone with the psychiatric ward of the hospital, wants a doctor Bulavon and then Rebecca gets all mad because he's playing golf. (I think the stereotype of a doctor having all this time to play golf and money at the expense of the people he treats was more problematic than this mental hospital angle. At least in this episode; no one actually got committed, no suicide occurred and it was just a pointless spot in the middle of the episode.) Rebecca wants him because she has a crazy person on her hands and then blows off the phone because it's not her. (I should note that Bulavon is Yiddish for loud mouth know-it-all; "a boorish, brutish person". So, that one is for you, Brendala. Anyhow; I originally thought this was the nonsensical part of the episode; but considering that Baloo's acting strange, it makes sense here. Although, the ableism here is at it's peak. Thankfully; it's far from Chargeman Ken's version of it since it was only toxic wording that was problematic, but still. ) Well; considering all the babyfaces in this series; the clerk has a point there. (Yeah; Don Karnage, the monster heel is normal. Actually; that would be perferable actually. At least then we can put the burden on Don Karnage to take personal responsibility for his own actions; but he's the main heel so he won't.)

We then cut to another shot closer to the bedroom door above the stairs where Rebecca is talking as Don Karnage is blowing off Baloo for sitting on his ass. (Umm; that is his job Anthrax, because that is a personality trait of his.) We then see Baloo and Don pacing each other in a circle blowing each other off and then they try to escape; but no dice. Then they fight around and Don uses an amazing amount of strength to lift five hundred pounds plus on his back and runs onto the window sill with ease. I see where Kit Cloudkicker got his strength training from for Last Horizons. (Considering the amount of damage Kit had to endure from Baloo's weight just on his groin alone, I'm surprised Kit is still a spring chicken even at twelve years old. He has to be a god; there's no other explaination that works here.) Baloo panics and the window sill breaks (of course) and they free fall; forcing Baloo to grab the steel pipe on their right on the way down. (I should note that one of the gimmicks for this episode is that the position of Don Karnage make him taller than Baloo; so every so often, he bonks his head into the metal doorways of the SeaDuck and Iron Vulture. Yeah; this show still believes that concussions are funny. It's not and a pox on everyone who gave Miss Lips this gimmick for Fish Hooks.) Then that breaks, they stuff themselves into the barrel of laughs and it breaks as they are all wet. Geez; another sick MAN-SIZED bump off Baloo's chin; and Don's to boot. Don proclaims that he got them down and he has a point there too. (Hmm; this has to be a DTVA motif: landing on your chin after a great fall. Unless you are a child; then you land on your belly, ass or back. It's kind of like Family Guy when they impact the ground, their arm is twisted onto their back for no good reason that I can think of. I know many critics love to scream bloody murder when that happens.)

We see Rebecca in her office at the filing cabinets putting folders into them. I suppose you need to do something before Doctor Bulavon comes around to put Baloo in the mental hospital. We pan west to see the keys on her desk (how convenient, eh?) as Baloo talks about two for one sales for clothes. (Oh, this had to be BS&P's doing: Rebecca is about to commit you to a mental hospital and you have a terrorist on your back who you know is probably going to turn on you at any moment and his actions are building up to him doing the heel turn back again. And you are more concerned about clothes? Come on, Pop-A-Bear! That is so stupid of you.) Don grabs the conveniently placed fishing pole inside the open window. How convenient, eh?! Don manages to fish the keys to Baloo without any problems whatsoever. (As Mike Teany would say: Just like that!) Baloo still blows him off as a thief though. (Don Karnage was "fishing for compliments" so says Baloo. Yet another throwaway spot that someone thought was a good episode title for Fish Hooks: Fishing For Compliments The Albert Glass Story. Oh; and that episode sucked if I last remember it; and it's a damn shame because Albert Glass was AWESOME on that show.) We cut to a side shot of Rebecca looking at some paper near the filing cabinet as the engines of the SeaDuck begin to roar like lions in the background. Rebecca gets the LIGHTBULB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY as we see WildCat is somehow near the window noticing the SeaDuck leaving the docks. (How he didn't see that is a mystery to me. He must have been on the far western side of the office at the time sweeping since that's the only way it makes sense.) The two babyfaces run out as Rebecca wants that plane stopped and WildCat proclaims that her wish is her command. WildCat makes the leap of faith, dives into the water and grabs the rope.

WildCat proclaims that he has it and we get some bare foot skiing to waste time. Ah; I see WildCat wants to be like Kit Cloudkicker. I'm betting BS&P made that decision because WildCat takes a good bump into the ringing buoy and he does a 360 with it as he needs a nap. Heh. (He didn't just bonk into the bouy; he tackled it down and then bopped up, like he was trying to catch a whale with his bare hands.) Rebecca just covers her eyes and runs stage left. (I think she was so embarrassed and worried that she let someone crazy get away.) We get a shot of the SeaDuck dash board as it has a clock on it now -- probably installed by Rebecca no doubt for obvious reasons -- as it's 4:30 pm; giving them ninty minutes to get there. (No; it's 3:30 pm; which gives them two and a half hours to get there. Are you watching a different version of this episode or something?) Don is panicking; but Baloo is flying proclaiming that they will be there before he knows it. Then we head into Don Karnage's room as Dumptruck is trying out Don Karnage's captain uniform. Blastophmy! No one touches Don Karnage's wardrobe, except for Kit Cloudkicker of course. He's also trying out the mirror just to rub it in some more as Mad Dog is at the window and whines at something which Dumptruck blows off. Mad Dog continues to whine as Gibber and Dumptruck head to the windows and Dumptruck swears like Kit Cloudkicker because the SeaDuck is coming back. Dumptruck then goes to the pipe radio and uncorks the pipe. He then yells for them to fasten their seat belt and then orders them to get the plane as he corks the radio at the same time. We then cut to the skies as the SeaDuck is flying as Don continues to blow off Baloo's sluggish flying as Baloo tells him to relax because they are safe as a bug in the rug. Don blows off the violation of anime conduct rule number twelve because here come the CT-37's surrounding them.

Umm; no, they are on your tail section; but not surrounded. Someone needs to check Len Uhley's dialog here. (No; they come up from behind and surround them for a few seconds.) Don then breaks logic and reason by putting down the conveniently placed window binds because they haven't been seen yet. (This was more of a logic hole than the CT-37's dialogue.) Baloo blows that logic off; but Don counters that they have seen the SeaDuck but not Baloo stuck to him yet as the SeaDuck flies into the Iron Vulture and lands on the landing strip. Don proclaims that he is not the only one here with a plan, Krackpotkin or otherwise. Okay; I made up the last part. (Now watch and see how Don Karnage's best plans go awry because Baloo mistrusts Don Karnage so much that he screws him at every possible turn like a heel.) The Air Pirates surround the SeaDuck and out comes Don Karnage wearing the blanket as the pirates are SHOCKED, most so Dumptruck. (I should note the golden plated steampunked pistol Sadie is welding. So after 42 episodes, we have 35 of those episodes where the guns are pulled out.) We then see Dumptruck surprised that Don Karnage is alive as he grows Baloo arms. HAHA! Don notices the nice coat and proclaims that he's handsome too. (He says it in such a way that you know Dumptruck is going to be hung by his pinkies when Don is through with him.) Don walks to the right proclaiming that he has returned and does a ***** BS story against Baloo as Baloo even remembers to actually punch Don in the kisser on screen. HAHA! (That was a hard punch too; hard enough to make Don sell like he was dead with those "X" anime eyes of his.) Don grabs the hand and they wrestle around a bit as this whole Baloo/Don rivalry just gets funnier and funnier by the second. If only the animation wasn't so wonky. Mad Dog comes over proclaiming that it was some fight because he doesn't look the same and even some of the Air Pirates mumble over that one.

Baloo is not amused as Don proclaims that he has been working out. (The coolest heel in the world. So vain and heelish that he doesn't realize that his crew want to turn on him since they like Dumptruck as a captain since he hasn't really abused them...Except for Mad Dog; but he's the bump machine, so there you go.) I see he's on Hoppo's See Food Diet too. AHHAHAHAHAHA! POW! OUCH! Ummm... Don then orders the pirates to chart a course thirty degrees north northwest and then takes another sick MAN-SIZED bump into the door ceiling. OUCH! This is a lot more cringe worthy considering the effects concussions can have on athletes. (Yeah; the fat jokes are much safer than concussion jokes at this point; so Hoppo can kiss and kick my ass for all I care.) Don blows himself off (no, not really) before walking off. Mad Dog isn't sure he wants Don back as Dumptruck certainly doesn't want him back because then he cannot become captain, see. Mad Dog tells him not to be so sure about that as you can tell the heel turn is coming making Don the third tweener of the series. (Luckly; it doesn't happen because then Don loses his comedy value.) We head to the Pirate's Rectangle Table as the air pirates are all seated in their places and behaving much more classier than they were earlier on. (Which means that there's no food fights and everyone burps and bleches only.) The door opens which looks downright weird and here comes Don Karnage as Baloo whines that the factory is still a hundred miles away. Don blows him off because he's trying to save their hides see. (Geez; you would think that Don Karnage's 30 degrees north-north west order wasn't a hint that Don is trying hard to not turn on Baloo for being an asshole. How did Baloo's Air Service stay in business as long as it did without a navigator nor a new owner?! Because Baloo's hatred of Don Karnage is blinding him to the fact that Don Karnage is smart enough to realize that he is stuck to him and the pirates are not going to accept him in that form.) He walks to the end of the table and sits down as Ratchet provides him a meal of mash potatoes, a loaf of bread, peas and bananas. (Why do animators have the weirdest meals shown on camera? Bananas with the main course? That's odd even by America's low standards as of late.)

Don tries to eat; but Baloo's arms keep screwing with him as Gibber calls Don loopy complete with the "waves fingers in a circle motion" in case you didn't notice. Baloo's arms keep stuffing the bananas into Don's midsection. HAHA! Don is getting more pissed off by the second as Baloo proclaims that he'll feed him and jabs the french bread right into his eye. HAHA! (Okay; this is funny, but it's clear that Baloo is acting like an asshole to nurse his grudge against Don Karnage. Yes; Don has done a lot of terrible things that Don Karnage loves; but this is not the time to be screwing with him. Let Don Karnage feed himself and stop screwing up the plan. I swear Baloo looks like a damn heel in this episode and it's going to get even more obvious.) Dumptruck stands up and he has had enough of these silly games. He whistles as Baloo calls this a really bad plan. (Oh, I wonder why?! It can't have anything to do with the fact that you keep screwing up the plan, Pop-A-Bear?! Oh no; it's never Baloo's fault even though he's the one controlling the arms. I hate Michael Eisner politics!) Don is too vain to realize it as he blows off Baloo because they adore him. (Well; Stockholm Syndrome can sometimes have that effect on people.) Don then asks what is on their tiny minds and Dumptruck gives two fingers to indicate two words: Mu-tiny. Heh. That ends the segment about sixteen minutes in. (I think one of the reasons why I downgraded this episode the last time was due to Baloo's heelish antics in this episode. I mean, come on. Babyfaces should know that this is not the time to nurse a grudge with the heel that is stuck on you. Don Karnage is really in no position to turn on you at this time since he's stuck on you. It's not like Just A Tad Smarter where Duke Igthorn was free and could move; and thus had a chance to turn heel at anytime; but didn't even tease it. Here; Don Karnage teased it and Baloo took it to heart as him turning even though Don Karnage turning heel now is a bad idea for both of them, not just Baloo. Anyhow; the episode is still funny.)

After the commercial break; We see Don try to stand up as Baloo proclaims that Don Karnage is going to blow his cover. (Oh yeah; he's gonna turn on you all right..and you're going to have egg on your face when you find out that the Air Pirates reaction is not the one neither one was expecting.) Don punches him in the face -- shown as his gut -- because he needs a little faith. Wow; another on screen head shot; sort of. (Ah; so as long as the face is covered and it's around the midsection, you can punch someone in the face without impact stars or flashes. Surprised no one in anime has considered that. Yet.) Baloo stands up as Don asks them again and Dumptruck proclaims that they are taking over. (The Dumptruck World Order~! With Big Dumpy Cool as Dumptruck~! This is one buy; but the rest of the world really don't care.) Mad Dog calls Don crazy again, Don grabs him by the throat and orders him out to use that word. (So Toon Disney is concerned about guns; but wringing and choking someone with your bare hands is perfectly fine. Never mind that outside of gun use; strangulation is the next preferred weapon of murder; and it's so easy to mimic than guns. Censorship: It sucks unless you want to self control your own product. Then it's all right, I guess.) Then Toon Disney ruins the funniest moment of the episode because Dumptruck grabs his gun. We then begin the following exchange as the following two lines and action are cut:

Dumptruck: {Pointing the gun at Don.} If you're not crazy; how come you act crazy?
Don Karnage: Crazy?! CRAZY?! There is a perfectly simple reason! (Mad Dog backs away.)
Baloo: (This is where Toon Disney returns after cutting the previous two lines.) Don't do it. Don't do it. (Shaking his head.)
Don Karnage: {Pulls off the blanket and blows Baloo's cover.} I have got... A BEAR ON MY BACK!
Baloo: He did it.

What makes this cut useless, you ask?! If you guessed that Dumptruck still has the gun on the shot where Baloo's cover is blown; you win the no prize. Here's a clue Disney: Censors hate anything that compete with their product or worldview. They will notice that gun in Dumptruck's hand regardless where it is pointed. (Yeah; because moral guardians are not stupid. They are vile. Besides; it's like the scene with Kit admitting that he was an Air Pirate in Plunder and Lightning Part III: By cutting the two lines out; the full extent of Don Karnage's desperation is not shown and thus it lessens the impact of just how scoiopathic Don Karnage can get when he is under distress like he is now.) I hate to say this; but 4Kids' editing practices make more sense than Toon Disney's ever will because TD's practices seem to be out of stupidity while 4Kids at least is more consistent. Mad Dog is shocked and appalled that there is a monster, Don is pissed off some more and they run side by side to get away; but Baloo and Don are still stuck. (Yeah; did you notice that he was called a monster and he acted like that was much worse than being called crazy? Geez; I wonder what his reaction would be if he was called a terrorist? Would all of the TaleSpin world blow up in a nuclear blast just on Don Karnage's reaction alone? I doubt it; but I'm certain Mad Dog would be dead and dismembered when that happens.) Baloo grabs onto Don Karnage, they run onto the table and destroy all those innocent meals into the faces of the Air Pirates. Baloo runs out the door and we go to a shot of a porthole as it opens. Don and Baloo pop out and we get more attempts to escape the glue; but no dice as the tweener goofs are still blowing each other off. Baloo for having no faith in Don since Baloo thinks Don has turned on him. (Even though it was Baloo who screwed up the entire plan by letting his stomach take over his mind, like a glutton.) In reality; it's the Air Pirates that have turned on Don.

Don tries to pick stage left; but the portholes open and here comes the pirate mob as it's the chase of the idiots. Baloo blows Don Karnage off as a cheater, thief and liar. Don gleefully answers that one for me because it's his job, see. Spoken like a true pirate on so many levels. (I think Gravity Fall stole this one and it is as hilarious on that show as it was here. Sociopathic honesty heelish at it's finest!) We then cut to the same porthole about thirty seconds ago as the pirates run away not suspecting a thing. The porthole opens as Baloo blows off Don for blowing their cover; leading to this awesome exchange:

Don Karnage: Okay; one little slip-up. So shoot me! {Gunfire ensues hitting the porthole with ease.}
Baloo: {Panicky.} I wish you wouldn't say that!

HAHA! Also; a popular joke I use every chance I get from this series. (If you don't like it, shoot me of course. Why should it matter? Death threats on the Internet are a dime a dozen nowadays. Why not?! It's not like I haven't made fun of dying from people shooting at me in my ranting career already. I don't remember the episode I did this; but I remember that I did it. Besides, I almost died from a boil in my asshole too. So; why am I still talking about this?!) Baloo then notices the clock above the door and it's 5:52; so they have only eight minutes left as we zoom out. (Actually it's 5:51; but whatever. It makes more sense than having the clock at four o'clock and spending only eighty minutes in the Iron Vulture compared to having 240 minutes left which is what happened here. They gave it enough time to have it all make sense. I just wish Sunwoo's animation was much better than it is right now.) We see Baloo and Don running down the stairs. We see an unknown Air Pirate standing next to the door. The door slams open and rams into the Air Pirate as Baloo and Don Karnage run away. The door start to recede; but not before Dumptruck and the DOGS OF WAR slam the door into the Air Pirates face; knocking him out in a cute spot. The pirate looks like someone with a bandana and a striped shirt; but I don't know his species. (Still don't know.) We see a narrow hallway as Don pulls the conveniently placed lever (WRONG LEVER!) and we see them get onto the platform as it rises (with the SeaDuck on it) as Dumptruck and his heels cannot get them. (Boy; that landing strip has a computerized mind since it took a minute for it to start rising and it almost allowed the heels to get on said platform.) Mad Dog whines to the posse to get to their planes and Dumptruck blows him off because he's in charge, see. Gibber whispers in Dumptruck's ear and of course Dumptruck orders the men to their pirates at once. HEE HEE! (Again; Dumptruck is supposed to be in charge, but Gibber is the one giving Dumptruck advice. So shouldn't Gibber be in charge?)

We then see the SeaDuck rise to the top of the Iron Vulture and the SeaDuck engines have started as the props turn on the closeup shot. The TaleSpin victory song starts on the far shot and then we see in the cockpit Baloo and Don fighting over the controls. (I hope Bandai-Namco gets the license to TaleSpin because inserting the Valkyrie Song from Legend of The Valkyrie in that world would be wonderful and glorious.) They are truly the mismatched wacky partners who hate each other and people claim ECW is no cartoon?! (Just because you have dark, edgy characters with blood, violence and sex doesn't make it realistic. ECW is a violent cartoon at best; on par with adult cartoons of the present including Camp WWE coming up on the WWE Network.) The SeaDuck takes off while we head into the Iron Vulture landing strip as the iron beak is still closed, Mad Dog whines on transmitter to open the mouth and Dumptruck yells at him to shut his mouth. Not shut up; but close enough. (Then the beak opens anyway; so even Dumptruck is getting tired of Mad Dog's whining gimmick at this point.) We go back to the SeaDuck as Don Karnage points out on the map that they are twenty miles from the glue factory and that they are going to make it. (See; I knew that throwaway spot where Don orders his men to chart a course 30 degrees north northwest would lead to something. This only serves to make Baloo look like a big poopyhead who doesn't seem to realize that this is not the time nor place for Don to turn on him legit.) However; the gunfire finally ensues and the Air Pirates are on the SeaDuck's tail section for the third time in this episode. We are up to 1.8 Trigun now as the SeaDuck does some dodging and Baloo goes into Kit mode with the pilot's cap on backwards. The SeaDuck goes under a bridge and for some reason no one sells properly. They then go through a forest which is recycled animation background from Polly Wants A Treasure and they go straight to the glue factory. I see an obvious jump cut for time there since the SeaDuck actually lands near the factory.

The CT-37's follow of course. (Not a big deal; the recycled background is still beautiful. I should note that the glue factory taking place in Loch Lein (Locklyn) is fanonal.) We then see Baloo and Don Karnage head inside the hallway as the Bugs Bunny Clone (Buster Bunny's Dad) follows from behind, and then at the front as they have only a few seconds left. Baloo doesn't care and asks what they need to do as they are on the catwalk and they stop right in front of the vat of chemical solution below. Sadly; we don't know what it is and I betcha Mike Adams would STILL be wanting to stay stuck. (I'm shocked that he hasn't slimed Satoru Iwata's death since Iwata had bile duct cancer and modern medicine. Plus; he's the biggest fanboy of gaming the world has ever see; whom Mike Adams hates because he thinks video games are tools of Satan. Are Nintendo fanboys really that rabid that even Mike Adams wouldn't want to screw around with them?!) The bunny wants them to dive in and then admits that they never tested this on people before. (I just thought of something: So it has never been tested on people before. So who has it been tested on? Of course; the logical answer would be animals. I've already covered the animal rights terrorism concerning this in one of my Quack Pack rants; so I won't discuss it here. However; if animals were used, doesn't that show that it would work on people too in this world when the characters are basically animal/human chimeras? Seriously; I thought of this for a minute and it makes the scientist's line hilariously pointless in hindsight. Why wouldn't it work?!) Baloo and Don don't care and dive in anyway into the vat of orange chemicals. (The He-Man of Woo & Quackery Mike Adams: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!) Don and Baloo pop up, spit out chemicals and I say that for now; it's fairly safe. Don and Baloo are apart as Don proclaims that they are divisible. HAHA! You got to love Don Karnage now.

Baloo and Don both climb out of the vat and they both land on each other again on the floor as the sounds of Air Pirates beckon to MURDER THEM. Baloo figures that this is the end of the promise and Don thinks Baloo is getting annoying right now. Baloo then states that his promises were not good for everything. (Now; Baloo's concern of Don Karnage's turning on him legit is actually apporos now since they are free and the Air Pirates are running in now. Even though the Air Pirate probably want to kill both men. However; since Baloo already thinks Don Karnage turned on him at the beginning of act three, the sympathy that we are supposed to have for Baloo isn't there. Sometimes comedy can be toxic, and sometimes it's not because of -isms either.) Remember that; because Don Karnage finds a wooden crate and stuffs Baloo in it giving him a good place to hide. (Don climbs onto the box and of course when Don starts starting his guard, they forgot to show him putting on yellow rubber gloves. I don't know why they bothered, it's looks like BS&P stepped in here.) The heels enter with their weapons drawn as Toon Disney edited out Dumptruck's "Let's pickle those herrings!" line because he has his gun cocked and loaded. Don Karnage stands his ground, pulls the lever (JESUS~!) which works the hook system and all three Air Pirates are hooked and raised. (I think Dumptruck dropped is gun in plain sight; which Toon Disney forgot to edit out of course. Gibber hugs Mad Dog; that was great.) Then several sprays appear, the Air Pirates are sprayed with green paint and then the Air Pirates are dropped to the ground as Don Karnage scolds them. Mad Dog starting whining about Baloo and Don no-sells it cutting promos right and left as Baloo is scared that his cover will be blown. However; Don decides that he doesn't see Baloo at all as he takes off his rubber gloves and smacks the DOGS OF WAR with it saying that he only sees three traitorous knuckleheads.

Don slaps their faces with the glove for good measure. HAHA! (Don Karnage: "If you moralish guardian-type persons wanted safety, show me putting the gloves on, you nimcomurdians!" Imagine him saying this while slapping them in the face with the yellow gloves. Or use Mad Dog, Dumptruck and Gibber. Same thing basically.) Wow, doesn't that make Pop-A-Bear look like an idiot now, doesn't he?! (Yeah; what a jackass Baloo was?! I mean; Baloo's cynicaliness really backfired on him as a babyface and now Don Karnage has swerved him; it makes Don Karnage look like a babyface. And he's supposed to be the cool heel. You wonder why people loved this character? He is the prototype Rock combined with Santino Marella's mannerisms. All he needs is a sock; and he can add Mick Foley to the list. Memo to Disney if they reboot this series: You can have that one for free.) Don then order them to go back to the Iron Vulture and Mad Dog and Dumptruck leave. However; Gibber is told to go on Dumptruck's plane as Don needs his plane to leave. However; before Gibber leaves; Baloo gives Don a pint of glue and a brush. (Okay; Sunwoo is just trolling now. Come on, guys!) Don goes to Gibber and brushes some glue on his mouth and nose in a funny moment as he takes his leave. (Don Karnage: "If you silly animator-type persons want me to take a brush and glue bucket from Baloo; show that silly bear type person finding the bucket and bursh first while pretending to hide, you nimcomators!" Same thing with the yellow gloves too.) Don is also about to leave as Baloo asks him why Don wouldn't call the DOGS OF WAR to MURDER him. Don explains that they had a pact as Dumptruck and Gibber get stuck by the glue in a funny moment when Dumptruck and Gibber have a whisper conference. (Don Karnage: "Ha! That'll teach Gibber to suggest having a garage sale!") Don also calls themselves men of honor. Well; he's only half-right and try to guess which one is right... (Hint: It isn't the fat gray bear with the pilot's cap on.)

Baloo offers a handshake; which in the wrestling world usually mean devious evil intention are in Baloo's mind. (Yeah; because it's usually the heel would does the handshake spot.) Don accepts the handshake and nothing happens. Don backs away telling Baloo that the truce is over and once they leave; Don Karnage will MURDER Baloo. (At least he's giving him a head start; thus making him look cool.) Baloo sells it and warns him to watch where he sits. UH OH! I smell evil intentions brewing here. (As in; out of nowhere glue because the continuity is having an off day today.) Don Karnage walks away from Baloo proclaiming that he'll show him who is the smart pants with glue on the bottom back of his coat to end the episode at 21:18. What a sneaky fat bastard that Baloo fellow is?! (Yeah; his last line was said like a sneaky man who has screwed Don Karnage over even though he's supposed to be the babyface. Granted; Baloo is a scumbag in the show; but this is prankster kids level type heeldom.) And fans are shocked when critics like me think that the Air Pirates and Kit to a lesser extent on the heel scale are cool heels?! This episode is still pretty funny; but Sunwoo screwups and nonsensical dialog really did a lot of damage to this episode in general. This episode just doesn't measure up anymore. (The dialogue in this show was better than you think; it was mostly due to Sunwoo animation doing the old "animate everything and forget shot continuity in the background". Otherwise; this was a fun episode with fewer logic breaks than expected; so I'm raising this back up to **** (80%). Don Karnage is such a star at this point that they only used him once more after this in Bygones, where if I'm not mistaken; Don Karnage wanted to kill Baloo legit and would have it if wasn't for Rick Skye.)

THE REVIEW LINE

Well; we have probably the largest drop in quality with this episode. However; this one was different -- and still really funny -- in the sense that Don Karnage was playing the babyface in this episode. Baloo was screwing his plans as he attempted to show that he had some honor in his work; even though he is a clear terrorist. (Yup.) Baloo's values of evil and good were so screwed up the moment he got stuck in the glue with Don that this was the only way that this episode would he worked without breaking logic. This was a Flintstones plot line that once again worked better than the original because there was a clear face and heel in this episode. (Sadly; this was getting stale at this point and they kept going to it and people cared less and less about it. Your Baloo's In The Mail was such a low point that not even Kit Cloudkicker could save it. Also even I don't think Don Karnage could either.) Baloo was mean in this episode and even through all that; instead of getting Don Karnage to sick his boys to attack Baloo; he basically punished them for committing treason against him. He basically let Baloo go and was very honest in what he stated. Baloo was the one who was dishonest as was evident in the last lines of the episode. This creates the impression that Don Karnage was a good guy and Baloo was the bad guy even though they are complete opposite. It's little wonder why parent groups hate certain cartoons. After all; the babyface/heel lines cannot cross in family values zone. (Even though Kit already zigzagged around it twice in Plunder & Lightning.) That's why we as human beings love them when they aren't just one alignment or another. Keep in mind that Baloo is supposed to be the #1 star in this show and was marketted as such by Michael Eisner and company.

There is a sense of difference; even in the lines of good vs. evil. (Baloo, Kit and Rebecca are morally gray characters in this series. They are not heroes; and at least two of them are not trying to be. Baloo is trying to be the hero; but doesn't want to put the work into becoming one. Kit and Rebecca just want to be merely kind persons in a sea of horrible people.) The problems were the bad Sunwoo animation at the beginning of the episode and then I got really frustrated at some of the dialog that simply didn't make any sense whatsoever for the context of the episode. The whole Rebecca calling a doctor went nowhere and of course some of the funnier moments were ruined because Toon Disney hated Dumptruck having a gun despite the fact that we saw Dumptruck with the gun when Don Karnage blew his cover. (There's a major dead end angle here: What about Rebecca and the mental hospital?! Why wasn't that paid off?! Oh, because Baloo let Don Karnage go instead of having him arrested and thus Baloo obstructed justice.) Overall; the whole storyline and antics were awesome; but they were dulled by animation mistakes and some out of place dialogue. Take those away; and this deserves the **** ¾ I gave last time. (Yeah; pretty much so.) Otherwise; it's a...

Thumbs barely up for this episode and I'll see you next time.

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