Return to 50 Webs

Disclaimer#1: All images, characters and material is (C) 1990/1991 Walt Disney Company and is being used without permission. The web master has made sure that no money was made in the creation of this web page and that all material used here is used with the up most affection and respect to the Walt Disney Company and the Tale Spin Team.

Disclaimer#2: The views expressed here are solely the views of the web master and no one else. The web master has no intentions to change anyone's minds about a particular subject and respects the views of the viewers. Comments about this and other editorial can be E-Mail at gweagle@eastlink.ca or signing the Cloudkicker guest book.

Your Baloo's In The Mail Re-Rant

Reviewed: 02/26/2011
Additional Commentary: 12/11/2021

Contains One Pink Slip For One Canceled Show!

Original Airdate: 02/22/1991 (Syndication), Episode #61 (TaleSpin Volume 3, Disc 1), Episode #65 (Production Order).

Your Baloo's In The Mail Notes
Your Baloo's In The Mail Transcript

Well; we have gone 60 episodes without a single episode going ** ½ or lower, but now we head to probably the dumbest episode in the entire series bar none. I should note that this is the final episode on the production paper which leads me to wonder why this episode was made instead of the script that was nixed like The Hunt For White November which went with the premise at least. This one on the other hand, looked like a Goof Troop episode. (2016 Gregory Weagle Says: Yeah; I decided to do one transcript and one re-rant on Natal Day Weekend because I am under the weather (and dropped sixteen extra pounds and below four hundred again). So, I picked what I considered in 2011 to be the worst episode of the series. Watching this episode again, with the ending and Rebecca looking like a pushover after months of booking her as a no nonsense business woman, are the only things that bothered me about this episode. In the past; it was the slow joke; but watching it and transcribing it, even though the joke was driven to the ground with a sledgehammer, it was at least not boring. It's not that this story is unwatchable and no fun. It was a fun episode. It was just pointless and it seems Jeremy wrote it in such a way out of frustration to prove that he can write a Rebecca that wasn't a difficult psychopath. This is ultimately what we got and it was so idiotic. So here's the plot: Rebecca wins the lottery, but has until eight o'clock tomorrow morning to get the winning ticket to Pazuza (A play on the wind demon, Pazuzu; who is often depicted as a combination of diverse animal and human parts. He has the body of a man, the head of a lion or dog, talons of an eagle, two pairs of wings, a scorpion's tail, and a serpentine penis.) in order to win. Rebecca is ready to go to the post office; but Molly has to go to a play as an artichoke. So Rebecca has to give the letter to Baloo to deliver; despite the fact that he's unreliable with important stuff. Molly suggests reverse psychology for this as Baloo returns doing his usual excuses. Rebecca asks him to deliever the letter and gives him twenty dollars for it. Baloo spends all but two cents on food and the rest on an eighteen class stamp which means it takes up to ten weeks depending on the mood of the old, slow mailman. Yes; the plot is basically Baloo and Kit forcing their hands to make sure the mail gets through. This is the sort of plot that you will probably see in the reboot of Ducktales with the nephews being the idiots. Once that happens; don't say I didn't warn you all. One final note: The Hunt For White November's plot was I believe about a Thembrian submarine found by the Air Pirates; which would have been the first time the Thembrians and Air Pirates crossed paths. They did cross paths in the comics once, though.) I wonder if we will finally have our first thumbs down episode legit? Let's rant on shall we...?!

This episode is written by Jeremy Cushner. The story is edited by Karl Geurs. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Yes, this episode is not Ken Koonce and David Weimers fault. I would love to hear and read the story of this episode's existence, although you could say that about everything media related to this series. The TaleSpin Iceberg would be immense.) The animation is done by Walt Disney Animation Japan/Hanho Heung Up Company Limited. (Nope 2011 Me, it's Sunwoo Animation doing the proceedings.) At least the animation will not suck; but considering that Cushner's last solo episode involved hyperboling Rebecca into a psychopath; I'm not taking this as a good sign. (Actually; the animation was good here for the most part. The good news is that Rebecca was not a difficult psychopath here. The bad news is that she's a pushover idiot who thinks reverse psychology is the rule of the day. Yeah.)

We begin this one with a far shot of Cape Suzette and then various jump cuts to Higher For Hire as a radio announcer as we see Rebecca sitting at her desk upstairs (Huh?) without the purple sweater. (Higher For Hire has two rooms upstairs; it's the first time they have used the second room, since the other room is Baloo/Kit's bedroom.) Apparently; she's entered in the Pazuza Anniversary Sweepstakes and of course she wins because if she didn't the storyline would be OVER right there. (Yeah; but that doesn't make this an idiot plot 2011 me.) Something I don't get: What's the point of the ticket number being on the ticket?! I guess Cushner didn't want to leave out details here. (Yeah; because her name was announced and not the lottery number which is usually how it's announced since most lotteries do not know who actually won the ticket until the prize is claimed by someone. My guess is that the actors were tripping over the lottery number and they changed it. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Which is hilarious considering that they probably tripped over the line about the mailing delivery service later within the next minute or so of this episode!)) Oh, lotteries were invented in 20 BC by the way; so this is not implausible by any means; but I wonder if they were outlawed like alcohol was during the 1930's? (I don't know; but lotteries are forbidden in the state of California since 2013. The first modern government-run US lottery was established in Puerto Rico in 1934.[6] This was followed, decades later, by the New Hampshire lottery in 1964. So the answer is yes and no to that question.) Rebecca dances around in victory and looks pretty good doing it. I'll give Struthers this; her acting is still top notch. Rebecca twirls down the fireman's pole (Huh?!) like a stripper (Double huh?! (That was certainly out of nowhere and I'm not just talking about the pole going down to the office.)) as the radio announcer explains that for Rebecca to win the hundred thousand dollar jackpot; the winning ticket must be in the mail delivered to their offices in Pazuza by eight am tomorrow morning. (Now who would be dumb enough to screw this simple task up? Huh...)

Rebecca of course; is prepared for such things as she heads to her desk, goes through her yellow book and finds the shipping company she's been looking for...wait for it...S.S.T.I.S.D.D which stands for "Super Speed Triple Insured Same Day Delivery" (complete with dog carrier). Nice to see the writers produce another joke that the adults will have a hard time getting. You'll understand why later. (Actually; I'll explain it now. It's one of the most absurd tongue twister ever. As Joe said in his blog about this episode: Oh, and how many times do you think the actors, charged with the difficult task of rapidly and repeatedly saying “S.S.T.I.S.D.D.” (purposely, or otherwise) ended that mouthful with “S.T.D.”? Ironically; "S.T.D." is out of date in the medical books and we call them "S.T.I.'s" now. So they are ending the mouthful with S.T.D. unintentionally; while having a mouth full of S.T.I. intentionally at the beginning. Amazing!) Rebecca discovers that it costs $17.50 to mail and she thinks that is outrageous. Mailing an ordinary letter for fifty cents is outrageous for your information so I can understand the outrage of Miss Cunningham. (Canada Post Stamps now cost a dollar to a dollar twenty; which is forty cents below fourth class mail in 1937!) Except that this doesn't apply to her as she places the ticket inside the letter and licks the letter. (I get that she is not supposed to be Scrooge in anyway; but to casually say that is not believable after the months of booking her with some sense in finances.) Rebecca then goes gets her sweater and finally puts it on as she states that the post-office closes in an hour which should give her lots of time. Except that Molly enters wearing an artichoke costume (BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!) and whines that she has a play to go to. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: That means Molly does go to pre-school after all even if the explaination of that is extremely vague through this promo.) Yeah; I guess that PETA would be upset if you didn't go to one of their rallies and Rebecca was a vegan all along. Oh come on; you know that cheap joke was coming! Molly looks cute in that outfit by the way. (For transcript and production purposes; this is Molly's final appearance on television for this show.)

Rebecca gets the LIGHTBLUB OF BLOODY CLAIRTY and realizes that she must ask Baloo to deliver it. Which causes her to have a double take because Baloo always messes up. Um Miss Cunningham; you got away with saying "screw up" in My Fair Baloo, it's okay to say "screw it up". (Which is hilarious considering the amount of destruction of people's properties with impunity this episode delivered near the end, including a spot that is on par with the nephews smashing through a glass window.) Molly then comes up with the best way to make Baloo not screw up: Don't tell him that it's important. Riiiiggghhhtttt. Rebecca kisses her calling her a genius. Molly corrects her of course and you can blame Molly for this episode happening...or maybe not. (Her plan was a total failure and it made Rebecca look like an idiot. At least she wasn't difficult, right?! Even though she looked like a pushover in this episode.) Scene changer of doom and we see the SeaDuck flying into Cape Suzette as Baloo is in the cockpit flying the plane with one foot this time. We then see Baloo putting bandages on himself and dousing himself with ketchup to make fake blood. Huh? Baloo going to do a Z-grade movie after this delivery is over or something?! Baloo calls to his navigator asking for ketchup and Kit -- for the first time since "Destiny Rides Again" and his second to last appearance on TaleSpin on television (Transcription wise; Flying Dupes is the only episode he's not in. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Production wise, this is his final episode on television until Ducktales 2017 Series 3!)) -- has nothing but a paint can of avocado dip. Baloo takes it and smears that on him. Wow; the writers are not only faking real blood; they are faking censored blood too. This is truly a rib on anime dubs. Although they need to find something blue and lavender to complete all the re-coloring of blood. I also find this rib kind of pointless when we saw a guard spit out blood like seeds in The Bigger They Are The Louder They Oink. (Actually; it was poop he was spitting out which is actually worse on the disgusting scale.) Baloo wants Kit to get the story right as they were five hours late because they were attacked by giant armadillos. (Which of course Baloo cannot even get straight when he lands the SeaDuck and does his poor excuse of an acting routine.)

Kit blows that off in a nice way as usual and puts a cross band-aid on his head. So, you cannot FAKE blood on a kid?! That whack BS&P! The SeaDuck lands as Rebecca and Molly wait for a taxi. The SeaDuck engines turn off and the doors fling open. Baloo storms out the side doing the funniest acting for an excuse in the history of the series. Apparently; they were attacked by clams. Ironically; a TaleSpin fan, Ricca recycled this scene and used it for her fanfic. It's the one where Rebecca dies from stress and Baloo used shoes for that scene. I take it back: This was the most entertaining part of the episode. I have a feeling that it's all downhill from here. (Actually; this episode had some really fun moments later on, mostly due to three senior citizens, and two of them had nicknames and first names to boot.) Baloo trips on his fake cast and falls like a bad habit which gives himself away. HAHA! Rebecca doesn't care and seems pretty happy about it. Molly and Kit are surprised at all this as the bears walk towards the taxi. Rebecca shrugs it off as she puts Molly into the taxi. Rebecca gives Baloo the letter and tells him to ask the postal clerk for S.S.T.I.S.D.D. Baloo screws it up on the first try as I expected him too. She also gives Baloo twenty dollars. (I guess she doesn't have exact change this week. Hey; she's no Don Karnage that much is for certain.) Baloo cannot believe this because then Rebecca kisses Baloo right on the right cheek and it's a really good one too! Illana Ruxpin: Watch this scene. Take notes. Baloo's reaction is as good as Grubby's. (I should note that Baloo cannot believe that Rebecca gave him that much money for a postage stamp even though it was clear that she was using an expensive delivery service. Barring that, she might have had only twenty dollar bills on her person at the time. So, yeah; it makes Baloo look like an idiot and it's 95% on him that he screwed up. Also concerning the kiss; Kit doesn't giggle when she does it, meaning that he's more of a bastion of kindness and good will than Teddy Ruxpin! And you wonder why I consider Teddy to be second rate now?!) He even thinks that Rebecca will ask him to keep the change. Rebecca and Molly get into the taxi. Rebecca tells him that it's not important and he can keep the change as the taxi speeds off. Baloo is amazed about all this and Kit blows it off as he only can:

Kit: Baloo? You've finally driven her over the edge.

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! There was no edge to drive her over. Like I said in War of The Weirds: You are all nuts, most so you; you little BS&P Nightmare. POW! OUCH! Hey... Sadly; that is the most entertaining part of the episode right there. We go to the scene changer of doom and head to the post office complete with letter sign on top. (Which the letter logo blocks out half of the sign.) We pan over to Kit and Baloo with the letter as Kit calls the post office dead ahead (death reference number one for the episode) and it looks like this episode could be over in five minutes. (Which would be about the length of a Chargeman Ken episode.) But wait?! Baloo wants to go to Paul's in order to order lunch. Kit protests this because that money is for mailing Rebecca's letter. Baloo blows it off because stamps are cheap. (When someone gives you twenty bucks for a stamp and says an acronym that sounds like two sexually transmitted diseases, a normal person would realize that this is going to be expensive and mail the letter. Baloo doesn't, because he's a irresponsible mandchild who doesn't have enough common sense.) Baloo orders burgers, fries and pies in the half-dozens. Well; except for the pies as they are five and they look like mincemeat pies. Interestly enough; the pies look like actual small pies. Kit of course gets the stupid spot of holding the stuff and he messes it up. Oh man; why does Kit need to be mercilessly buried?! Oh wait; I know why; my mistake. (Consider this: This was the last episode in production. Meaning the ending to this series involves the babyfaces chasing a garbage truck. Yes; I spoiled the last scene for you. Thank goodness Flying Dupes was delayed; because at least that episode ended with Spigot nearly getting the High Marshall killed with his "Hanging A Spigot" move. Now I need brain bleach to unsee that moment!) We head to the post office for real this time as we see the banker from Plunder and Lightning; Austin Featherridge and the moose from Golden Sprocket of Friendship in the lineup. Kit is looking at the board on the wall; probably hoping to find a job after Eisner cancels his ass for good. (It actually is the BBS for wanted criminals; and I am guessing that he's still wondering if he is on there for his crimes as an Air Pirate. Probably not; but considering that his picture is in Captains Outrageous, you just never know.)

We have the postal clerk whom is a bird furry with officer uniform and red hair, asking for their service, Baloo asks for S.S.T.I.S.D.D and he screws it up. Kit Cloudkicker tries it and he screws it up badly. Oh please Kit; you're smarter than that. There may be no murder in Disney Cartoons; but there is homicide in Kit's character as we speak. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Tongue twisters are bad for businesses. It has to roll off the tongue to make it work right and most do not!) The bird furry no-sells them of course. Baloo whisper yells at Kit as the customers are not amused by this. Oh and they are the same ones as before including a pig furry. (The continuity of this episode was great; it was this episode was stupid and pointless in spite of it's fun moments.) Baloo and Kit finally get it right and say it at the same time. This is why you never see company names this complex people. It leads to silly moments such as this. (And probably why they go out of business.) The bird furry finally gets it and tells Baloo that it will cost $17.50. Baloo is so screwed as he discovers why Rebecca give him twenty dollars in the first place. That was pretty cute; but watch this whole episode take a turn for the worse now. (Baloo's blubbering, stammering and acting were off the charts in this episode. He was performing well for someone who just realized that he was going to screw Rebecca over.) Baloo proclaims that he's a bit short and wants something cheaper. (Now; the problem with this is: Why not just take the letter himself to Pazuza? The problem is: He doesn't know where the letter is going even though the address is on the letter! Baloo cannot even read the letter even though Rebecca clearly wrote the address on it. I take it back, it's ALL on Baloo now! And this is going to make Rebecca look even worse at the end of this episode.) The postal clerk goes through the postal book and runs down the first eight classes which go to as high as $10.95 to as low as twenty-right cents. Baloo doesn't have enough for even fifth class at this point. The postal clerk slams the book on Baloo -- complete with coughing dust from Baloo -- asks Baloo how much he has. Baloo states that he only has two cents and a french fry.

Kit gets really flustered after that and I don't blame him. This episode is going down the drain as we speak and Cushner has zero interest in letting Kit carry the episode on his back like he can do. (Although to be fair; Kit did get a lot more lines in this episode than usual.) The clerk states that he can still mail a letter for two cents on eighteenth class. Baloo accepts the deal. Damn; is Baloo going to get the WRAITH OF BECKEY on this one. (In the entire episode; Rebecca looked mad only twice and most of that was in the third act, which lasted five seconds at the most. Rebecca was easy in this episode, to the point where I was hoping she would be difficult as hell.) The postal clerk warns that this mail service isn't speedy. Can you say "understatement of the series" or do I have to spell it out for you?! Baloo doesn't care because that letter isn't important. (Famous last words from Pop-A-Bear; since this is the final episode in production.) Scene changer as we go to the postal clerk going towards the lower right safety deposit box, manages to open the safety deposit box with lots of effort and drops the letter inside. Very rusty indeed. The letter slides down the twirling slide and that logically leads us to...The STOCK FOOTAGE OF DOOM as a taxi rolls in and out comes Rebecca and Molly back from the either the school play or if this episode was happening today; the PETA Anti-Fur Rally. (Oh come on, 2011 me! I realize that a lot of shows have vegan characters in them; but still.) Molly is still wearing the artichoke costume and probably having nightmares about being a strict vegan when she grows up. (How can she have nightmare of this? Sora from Digimon 01 was a vegan and a great character at that! Also; take a picture of her, that's the last time she speaks and is shown in this series for rant purposes.). Rebecca enter the office with Rebecca hoping that Baloo actually mailed the letter while sounding panicky. Rebecca then see Baloo and Kit trying to throw paper airplanes into the wastebasket and missing.Baloo tells her that the letter is mailed as Rebecca and Molly dance to victory. She even calls Molly a genius and kisses her (second time on her; third time overall). I'll give Cushner this; he hasn't done anything that breaks logic and the animation is dead on; but man; this episode is going to drop down like a slow death which is probably the worst thing that could happen to a series such as this.

Molly corrects her by calling herself the "Artichoke of Happiness". BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! If only Molly; if only. Rebecca is so pleased that she kisses Baloo once again. Thought I missed it the first time, huh?! Rebecca goes on about how Baloo is usually unreliable and off hand usually wants to strangle him (Which included a split second of her looking angry before recoiling.) but finally doing something right for a change. Two words to Rebecca: You wish! Baloo swears in DUBBED ANIME STYLE (Aw shucks!) and calls it nothing. You don't know the half of it Pop-A-Bear. We then jump cut to Rebecca then goes to the phone and calls the "Wish List Department Store" and starts shopping like a teenager only Rebecca wants the grandest stuff of them, like grand pianos and golden shower curtains. (This is one of those moments that annoyed me a lot more than the slow joke. The slow joke had some entertaining characters and it was never boring, allowing Baloo and Kit to try out their acting skills. On the other hand; Rebecca's shopping until she dropped angle in this episode was Cushner's subplot that barely got thirty seconds of air time and it only served to make Rebecca look like a slave to richness after months of booking as her being the no nonsense business person. I get that many people will fall for this angle in real life, but Rebecca's routine is that of a gendered stereotype. You couldn't have her take fifty thousand of the money and improve the actual business with important stuff instead of the trivial stuff she was buying here? Or have her save half of it and spend the rest of it? Another thing of note: The Department Store is named Richelieu's and Richelieu is a 1839 French play known for the catchphrase: "The pen is mightier than the sword." That amused me. ) Baloo then becomes the responsible one (Really?!) and wants her to stop because this will cost a fortune. Rebecca then finally tells Baloo the truth: That she won the hundred thousand dollar sweepstakes. (Later on in the transcripts; I was spelling sweepstakes as sweepskates. Damn.) Baloo is SHOCKED, then he is loving this and starts dancing around with Rebecca in unison. Get use to it Rebecca: You will be marrying him one day. Sadly; it will also be in the poor house too.

Rebecca explains him everything as Baloo tells her to mail the ticket now. However; Rebecca tells him that he already mailed to to S.S.T.I.S.D.D. Believe me you know it's way over your head if you have to pause the tape; read the name off the book and then peer up to re-write it when it disappears from the program. I suck; what else is new?! (I didn't have that problem because I watched the DVD version and that has subtitles, so it was much easier to transcribe the episode.) Baloo then realizes that he has screwed Rebecca worse than his dancing and goes into a shameful promo of stammering and stuttering like mad. Kit and Baloo run out of Higher...For...Hire faster than me running to start the computer screaming like a banshee. (Nowadays; it's faster than me screaming like a banshee after getting muscle cramps. Oh wait; that was before I was taking insulin shots which was after November 2015.) Wow; Ed Gilbert is trying to salvage this episode now. Rebecca is confused about all this. I don't blame her; I'm more confused as to why Michael Eisner ordered this episode into production that doesn't involved a reason of trying to bury this series once and for all. I mean; somehow in Eisner's tiny mind; an episode with a parody of the Hunt For Red October was the opposite of MONEY, MONEY, YEAH, YEAH. Or that pathos episode where we find out that Danger Woman is in a wheel chair and Molly's hero isn't what it really is. These were excellent stories. This is turning into a Goof Troop episode. (Yup; pretty much. Or the old dumb rule that kids just want comedy. Either way, dumb. Sure; TaleSpin can do slice of life episodes very well, and even simple plots; but this is a really thin plotline in comparsion to Pizza Pie In The Sky. Anyhow; Baloo claims that it was grouse season. Grouse /ˈɡraʊs/ are a group of birds from the order Galliformes, in the family Phasianidae. Grouse are frequently assigned to the subfamily Tetraoninae (sometimes Tetraonidae), a classification supported by mitochondrial DNA sequence studies,[1] and applied by the American Ornithologists' Union,[2] ITIS,[3] and others.[4] Grouse inhabit temperate and subarctic regions of the Northern Hemisphere, from pine forests to moorland and mountainside,[5] from 83°N (rock ptarmigan in northern Greenland) to 28°N (Attwater's prairie chicken in Texas).[6] )

We head back to the post office lobby as apparently; the moose and pig furry from earlier have returned to the post office for goodness knows what reason. Also, a warthog of Thembrian-descent is in the front of the lineup. (There is also a bear salesman who later appears in this episode with Rebecca discussing boats.) Kit and Baloo fling the doors opens and butt into line easily. I'm shocked Kick Buttowski hasn't tried this act of rebellion...yet. Baloo demands that the postal clerk return the letter to them as I see the first logic break here: Even if the post officer gives them the letter back; which he clearly doesn't since that would be breaking DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!); how do they pay for the postage to first class and doesn't that render the whole joke from earlier pointless. (Also of note: Since it's a federal crime (even in storyline) to touch mail, Baloo cannot fly the letter to Pazuza on the SeaDuck unless the postman is with him. More on that later. By the way; it's not a logic break unless the post officer actually gives the letter back to Baloo, so...) The clerk reminds them that the mail will go through by eight am tomorrow. Baloo and Kit feel relived until the clerk states that that's for S.S.T.I.S.D.D. For eighteenth class; it will arrive in ten weeks...seven with good behavior. Okay; that was pretty funny as Baloo and Kit end the segment nine minutes in with a fainting anime spot from Pizza Pie In The Sky which was actually well done; but the sound folks forgot the bump sound effect to make it work perfectly. (Sam Horta editiorial strikes again. I should note that the average parcel does take 4-8 weeks to deliver, so eighteenth class isn't all that far behind. However; this letter needs same day delivery, so...) So far; this episode has chugged along okay in spite of itself; but now behold as Cushner takes a plot device and really hammers it to the ground with the SLEDGEHAMMER OF PLOT~! (Personally; the whole plot line is the real problem; not the slow joke that get pounded into the ground as you'll see from here on out. The whole plot line is under the belief that Baloo is so beyond the pale stupid that he literally has to be irresponsible in order to make it work. Goofy could get away with this; because being a dimwitted fool is his gimmick. Baloo is more compentent than that and it just reeks of convolution. And it's going to get worse; but the actual journey to that point is the second best part of the episode actually.)

After the commercial break; we get a shot of the outside of the post office and we see Baloo panicking and running around the post office realizing that Rebecca is going to MURDER him if that letter doesn't make it to Pazuza by 8 am tomorrow morning. Lesson number one: When someone gives you twenty dollars to mail a letter; then the stamp is going to cost you twenty dollars, even if it's a ripoff. Baloo goes to the billboard and discovers that 18th class is in the basement. Both Baloo and Kit race downstairs and makes it to the basement post office while another bird furry at his desk sleeping on the job with his desk filled with cobwebs. Geez; no wonder people don't use eighteenth class. If there's some joke about birds and the mail that the writers are trying to convey here; then color me unimpressed. (More so when the joke is killed in Pazuza when a cat furry is sorting the mail.) Baloo and Kit storm in as Baloo plays peek-a-boo in the PIPE OF DOOM as the letter finally arrives and lands on the postal clerk's desk. The clerk acts like this is his greatest hour. See; he hasn't gotten mail to deliver in 40 years. (Which means the last letter was in his hands in 1897. I'm not buying that for ten weeks!) Let me guess; he was the first postmaster general of Cape Suzette too and he wears Scrooge's glasses. I have a feeling that this slow mail joke is going to be hammered to the ground. I can just feel it right now. (Yes; but it's the second best thing about this episode.) Baloo tries to touch the mail; but the clerk prevents it because the DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!!) state that mail cannot be touched once it's in transit unless it's by postal employees. Otherwise; it is a crime. I love real comments that aren't supposed to be real comments as the clerk falls asleep. Baloo wakes him up and the clerk states that he's trying to figure out what to do. Oh TAG! Baloo screams at him like a manly man. I'm sorry Ed; I know that you are trying to salvage the episode; but it's not going to work because Cushner is more interested in his one joke slow fetish than writing a sensible story. (True; but it's not the slow joke that is the problem. It's the notion that Baloo is beyond the pale stupid.) The eighteenth class postal clerk proclaims that it's all coming back to him.

He goes to the wooden cubby holes and places the letter inside as the clerk follows the rules of engaging a letter by sorting it and stamping it in the slowest fashion possible; all while saying "Bingo" at the end. "Bingo"; this episode is sucking the life out of me at this point. (Actually; this episode didn't drain me of life until the finish.) Baloo is stomping mad in all this. When the least over major character in the series agrees with me; you know this plot line is sucking fast. Believe me; it takes something indeed to make me sympathize with Pop-A-Bear and Cushner has actually succeeded. Did I mention that one year later; Jermey wrote a near ***** episode for Darking Duck called When Aliens Collide? (Yes; and it was very good in fact.) Anyhow; the clerk then puts the letter onto the cargo belt while going to the bicycle and pedaling it slowly across. Ah; I see they are environmentalists too. Baloo is panicky now because the letter is going to a boat which means the letter won't reach it's destination by tomorrow morning. The postal clerk blows him off stating that the S.S. Rocket is the fastest ship around. Baloo feels relieved slightly and then blows the letter forward a bit. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: The old "blow the baseball foul like a curler" move.) Baloo then goes over to the bicycle and pushes the postal clerk. Apparently; as long as he doesn't touch the letter with his hands he doesn't break DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!!). I think assaulting a postal clerk or anyone is also an offense; but whatever. (There was a lot of Baloo abusing authority figures in this episode and they also caused property damage later on.) Baloo gets onto the bike, starts pedaling faster than him eating bananas at Louie's, the letter speeds up and makes it to the S.S. Rocket; which is a big tugboat. Baloo and Kit step onto the conveyer belt and do a contrived spot of falling off the belt into the S.S. Rocket. Umm; we didn't need them to be WARNERED here, Sunwoo Animation! (I think it's because there was no door outside to the docks from the postal service. It's not as contrived as you think 2011 me.) Baloo and Kit take a decent bump into the mailbag as Kit realizes that this tugboat is the S.S. Rocket about thirty seconds after I pointed that out and is not happy with this.

Then another old voice beckons as another furry -- I think he's a monkey or a shew -- (I think he's a mandrill 2011 me.) in a naval uniform (and wooden leg talking like a sea pirate.) called Captain Grindstone Griff (Jim Cummings) (That pretty much kills the continuity the writers were shooting for. Then again; the bird joke was not funny so I don't care either way.)) who may or may not be related to Helga (check the wooden leg). He is the captain of the S.S. Rocket. Grindstone is giddy when he sees the letter because it's the first in forty years as Kit puts words in his mouth. Grindstone and Kit exchange lucky guesses as I wonder how the writers allowed Kit to do spots like this now. It's almost like Eisner has found out about Kit being a BS&P...Oh yeah; Grindstone takes the letter as a word from the Admiral in Pazuza apparently. (Grindstone Griff is really great for the three minutes that he was on-screen as he has a full name, dressed up nicely and has a personality that makes me wonder if he was groomed for bigger roles for a second season that we would never get.) Griff will be delivering it to the Air Mail Station. Baloo takes this as a sign of good times and Grindstone finally sets sail as the S.S. Rocket starts to move. One problem: The ship moves so slowly that even a person walking could go faster than the boat as we see Clementine's mother walking with the baby stroller. Oy vey; this episode is getting worse. (No it's not 2011 me. You are more concerned about them doing the slow joke over and over again; and completely missing the fun acting and spots during this journey. When the ending comes; the episode will get worse. Trust me on that one.) Baloo starts to panic again as he tells Grindstone to step on it because they are one hour away from AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark); despite the fact that if it were one hour AFTER HAPPY HOUR the sun would have almost set completely and thus it's BEFORE HAPPY HOUR (sunset). That's logic break number one for the episode and that's the last thing it needs. (Yeah; this was stupid on the animators' part.) Grindstone blows it off with talk about his navy experience. I love Grindstone and that's three entertaining things that I have seen in this episode. (The slow joke was great because of Grindstone and Ralph carrying the episode on it's back and being awesome in a "pay Baloo back for being so stupid" kind of way.)

Grindstone needs a better episode to work with. (Agreed, but not going to happen.) Kit then is at the end of the tugboat and is pointing at the docks where the boats are and we see Rebecca doing business with a greasy bear salesman with the tan suit, blue/black dotted bow tie and greasy black hair. We saw him in the post office earlier so he couldn't have walked too far. He is showing Rebecca all his sailboats which are all orange. (Most of them are grey. What episode were you watching 2011 me?!) Rebecca ponders and she wants it in pink. (To match her feminine side; even though pink is supposed to be a masucline color. I think.) Baloo blows her off of course and then notices a speedboat comes from the harbour as Baloo invokes the LASSO OF BANE TO ALL ACTION CARTOONS EVERYWHERE on the speed boat. Funny how this slow plot line has actually justified this lasso for once. If only TMNT took the hint and just gave Mikey a weapon that wasn't illegal instead of a tool. It latched onto the speed boat and then Baloo does the “classic” (as in dead as a doornail) “rope attaches to leg” (Which never makes sense since Baloo's foot is on the ground akin to the foot rise in the air spot that happens to counter heels coming off the top rope in pro wrestling.) spot and is forced to pull himself against the S.S. Rocket. Now the boat is going way too fast as Grindstone is in his element now. How nice for him because the S.S. Rocket is being torn asunder. (I should point out that Grindstone uses the word "darn" to mean "mend" instead of using it as a sub to "damn". So yes; even the word darn has a meaning. Geez, T.J., your theory on words whomps!) The speedboat manages to avoid the buoy; but the S.S. Rocket takes a MAN-SIZED bump and it is completely destroyed. (In an explosion. Yes; Baloo destroyed postal property with impunity and we accuse Johnny Test of this nonsense?!) Baloo, Kit and Grindstone twirl head over feet and create the conveniently made skis as we go water skiing with Kit on top of everyone else. That's the first good thing that has happened to Kit; contrived work notwithstanding.

We get the conveniently made ramp as the MIRACLE WORKERS CONNECTION PLUS GRINDSTONE do the ski jump spot and slide in safe onto the airfield while they jump off safely and perfectly. Finally an excellent spot by Cushner and it took thirteen minutes to pull it off! (That was a great spot and it justifies the slow joke as being effective in terms of comedy.) We cut to a closeup of Baloo as he is happy because they are at the air field and there are five planes outside. Why is he impressed?! Because he's setting himself up to being screwed again, silly readers. Grindstone walks (gingerly) towards a old dog named Ralph...Rightstuff Ralph as said at the end of this sequence I should note. Rightstuff Ralph is giddy for getting a letter for the first time in forty years. I think it's safe to say that the joke is officially hammered into the ground and it's time to bring the Rebecca shopping spree angle in now. (Which he doesn't. Probably for the best anyway considering the stereotype.) Ralph goes into his airplane Matilda and thus gets even more character development than the previous three new characters combined as much as I like Captain Grindstone. (Yes, Ralph gets a nickname, a personality and even has an airplane with a name! Wow; what happened here? Poor Professor T. Bird prototype postman didn't get any of these.) Ralph starts flying while pieces of the plane are being pooped out. Really; they are. Baloo and Kit do a pointless spot by picking the pieces up and putting them back into the plane. The plane does some good flying much to everyone's surprise until the plane breaks up completely and Ralph is forced to bail. Baloo catches him on the way down and Ralph pulls the parachute cord to release the parachute over the two goofs. HAHA!

Guess what; Ralph isn't too bad. Cushner is trying hard; but the joke is just MURDERING this episode good now. (Ralph and Grindstone are the main reason why this episode is fun. They took a really thin joke and made it entertaining. Besides; the real problem is coming up soon and no one is going to like the finish to this episode.) We see Kit walking in proclaiming that they will never get the letter delivered and Rebecca is never going to trust Baloo again. I don't think anyone is going to trust you after this crappy performance even though it really isn't your fault. (Yeah; I have seen Kit in action when they find uses for him and he's awesome. Being cute and moving and talking are fine, but he's much more than that.) Baloo pops from the parachute and apparently we have logic break number two for the episode as Ralph is nowhere to be found. Baloo proclaims that he has a Krackpotkin plan to this problem as he and Kit run stage left proclaiming that he'll steal Rebecca's plane. Which is actually the SeaDuck which used to be your plane Baloo. Okay; I'm splitting hairs as usual since I need to make this paragraph not look like an orphan. That ends the segment almost fourteen minutes in. Considering the amount of effort the voice talent is putting on (Kit notwithstanding) despite the crappy script; I wonder if this episode broke their souls when The Incredible Shrinking Molly occurred?! I don't know actually. (Okay; we are fourteen minutes in and the plot is an idiot plot; but the elements and spots were perfectly acceptable cartooning. The setup and build are fun enough and Ralph and Grindstone are great in their roles. However; it's still being done to set up a depressing finish, rendering the whole episode pointless and bad.)

After the commercial break; we head to Higher...For...Hire AFTER HAPPY HOUR (after dark; complete with crescent moon that 4Kids would dub out) as Baloo, Kit and Ralph practice the fine art of not being seen. Baloo signals all clear because Rebecca is apparently asleep. You wish Pop-A-Bear! Ralph thinks it's past his bedtime too. Memo to Ralph: You are an adult. You can sleep anytime you want to. It's a free country. I think. (I'm fine with him saying that because my bed time is much earlier than that. So I am in no real position to tell Ralph what to do.) Kit calls Baloo crazy because the SeaDuck's engines will wake her up. Sure, but I want this episode over so I can get out of here and do something else. Baloo, Kit and Ralph run towards the SeaDuck. Kit's point turns out to be a moot one (DAMMIT Cushner!) because Rebecca Cunningham steps out of the office wearing a clone of Baloo's pilot hat and a cyan blue dress shirt I do believe. I guess it was to get him back for wearing her hair in Baloo Thunder. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: I hope this is what the writers intended, because it would make this episode slightly somewhat better in hindsight.) Baloo, Kit and Ralph are forced to stop and turn around. Baloo stammers like crazy as Rebecca poses for a while. Then Rebecca walks over and notices that the letter in Ralph's hand looks awfully familiar. Baloo blows it off and calls for moose season due to his watch which looks like he stole from Ralph when Ralph was talking about his bedtime. Baloo wants a chocolate moose apparently while Rebecca thinks that the letter is the same as the one Baloo mailed to Pazuza. Sadly; Ralph nearly blows off his cover because he's honest, see; before Baloo grabs onto Ralph's mouth and carries him away to the SeaDuck stage left. Baloo runs over and throws Ralph onto the roof of the SeaDuck which is where the conveniently placed trap door is located and Ralph free falls into the Duck. WHAT THE HELL? It makes more sense than last time I ranted; but why bother when you can throw him through the window?! Same result, basically. (Yip.) Baloo grins from ear to ear, then Baloo then suddenly start to mope, walks slowly towards Rebecca and states that he's going to tell the truth: It's a letter for Santa Claus, they promise to be real good and cough up a hundred grand.

Careful Baloo; there's a chocolate bar with your lawsuit on it. (Believed to be filed by the Million Dollar Man.) Rebecca no-sells and finally seems ready to invoke the WRAITH OF BECKEY. (Ah, here's the second time she got mad and it lasted three seconds tops. Yeah; she was a total pushover in this episode. Talk about a pendulm of extremes from Jeremy here.) However; Ralph start flying the plane backwards and feels like a child on Christmas morning. One that did a time warp from the 1890's. Baloo and Kit are forced to jump onto the SeaDuck's nose and get onto the roof. Baloo manages to make it to the side door and opens it to get inside. Kit apparently goes through the right window as he's in the navigator's seat. Baloo runs in and forces Ralph out of the pilot's seat since it's his plane. However; Ralph states that according to DA RULES (FAIRY GODPARENTS!!) that since he has a official piece of mail; only he can fly the plane. Okay; your slow and doing your job, we bloody get it. Guys; this episode is out of gas and it's time to mercy kill it. Kit looks at the map and realizes that they have only ten hours to make it. Baloo then decides to make a deal as we return a bit later to see Baloo in the pilot's seat with Ralph taking the control like a small child. Finally; a plan that Baloo couldn't screw up. The SeaDuck flies towards Pazuza as we head to the dumbest finish ever in this series. (This was one of those finishes that was completely screwed up in so many ways that it made for the worst episode of the series. One thing about TaleSpin: They do killer finishes that made you want to watch this show, even if the build was below par. This episode had a great middle and somewhat fine setup; but the finish and ending made me want to watch Batman: The Animated Series instead. It made The Time Bandit look like a ***** classic in comparison.) We cut to see Kit sleeping with the blanket map and looks at his watch. Kit start to plead to Baloo that they are five minutes away from defeat and Pazuza is just ahead. (Okay; here's the first screw up: Kit's says this at 16:48 and the zero buzzer happens at 19:14 on the DVD. That's about two and a half minutes only. So Baloo gets screwed by real time. That is the least of this finishes problems since it wasn't a life nor death situation even though they should have won the prize.)

Baloo might just make it as the SeaDuck does the spot of scaring people away and landing right in the middle of the street doing damage to a lamp post and a hydrant. (Which means he destroyed three government property products in this episode alone.) Baloo grabs Ralph and they head to the post office. They storm in, Baloo places Ralph onto the table and screams for an emergency eighteenth class delivery. The postal clerk -- who is a cat furry sorting a large pile of mail -- blows him off and tells Ralph to place the mail on the pile and waits its turn. Kit states that there is just three minutes left. Baloo then gets another plan, does contrived spot number five and sneezes so badly that the letters fly all around. That was enough of a distraction to let Baloo place Ralph and the letter onto the conveyer belt. Ralph then outclasses nearly everyone in the entire episode by taking some decent bumps off the mail sorting stuff. Baloo then grabs Ralph who gets stuffed into the mailbag at the end and they go outside. Baloo reads the address on the letter which is 3272 Chickafill Hill. Ooooookkkkkaaayyyyy. (Damn, that scumbag of a company even has a hill named after them. Worse; it's in a city named after a Hindu wind demon.) He puts Ralph on his feet and of course he walks too slow for his own good. Oh crap, just end it already! (That would prove to be a bad idea when you consider the finish Cushner wrote.) Baloo faints dead away as the Pazuza announcer beckons that they have two minutes to go or Rebecca's a sore loser. Nice way to get repeat customers, sir! That wakes Baloo's up (contrived spot number six), he grabs Ralph and Kit and forces them into the postal service van! Oh man; I think that shouldn't be in there for some reason. (Considering that they are driving it; that would violate the law wouldn't it?!) Ralph almost leaves the truck; but Kit manages to pull him in. Man; Kit's performance has been sub par, which is an absolute rarity before this point. Baloo drives the truck up the hill as there is only one minute to go. This is turning into a NWA Sixty Minute Wrestling Match for the NWA World Title as the truck makes it to the top and takes a MAN-SIZED bump into a fire hydrant. (It was a lamp post. So there's number five and six.)

That forces Kit, Baloo and Ralph out of the postal truck and they take a bump that would kill them in real life. (HOLY CRAP! When I was transcribing this; I noticed that they bumped into a lamp post and smashed through the windshield; flew out of the truck via the windshield on screen, full bore and landed on the concrete sidewalk. Just like the nephews smash their faces through a window in Ducktales, only the shot wasa wide shot in TaleSpin compared to the closeup in Ducktales. Then proceed to no sell seconds later. People would point to that and say: THAT WAS FAKE~!) They are all right sadly as Baloo is left with the steering wheel. The Pazuza announcer yells thirty seconds as Baloo panics and is forced to cross a dangerous street. (Take that Kick Buttowski! Kick: Oh, biscuits!) Baloo almost gets hit by a car which blocks the pathway to the counter as I point out that Ralph is doing his mailman's pledge promo the whole time. (Ralph's mangling of the promo was as entertaining as Baloo's blubbering, which was amusing to me. Sadly; the entertainment is soon going to be over.) Baloo then jumps onto the roof of the cars and manages to make it to the other side...right into the OUT OF NOWHERE police officer who looks like a Ducktales dognose from Treasure of The Golden Suns; only with a tan. I just rolled my eyes seeing that. Baloo is stopped as the conveniently placed police officer give him a ticket for jaywalking. (I think it was for vandalism which makes a hell of a lot more sense than jaywalking. I don't know since the officer never explained the charge to the audience. Not that it matters at this point.) That is the best spot of the entire episode right there and it fits right into the context of Baloo's decision. (Also that ends the entertainment right there too...) The counter reaches zero and Baloo is forced to throw Ralph right at the counter. The bell rings as Ralph flies towards the counter; but the Pazazu sweepskates announcer (who is a Thembrian-descent warthog by the way) shuts the window counter down and Ralph takes a MAN-SIZED bump against it like a bug on my windshield. Rebecca loses a hundred thousand dollars, thanks to Baloo's decision to spend $19.98 on food at Paul's. Proof that in the TaleSpin world: Fat people are really losers.

Wow; what a stupid finish that was and it's also downright depressing to watch this slow plot device pounded into the ground and there's no real payoff to be had. (That is not the problem. The problem is: It's depressing to see such an entertaining episode in spite of the idiotic plot because the journey to the end was in fact great. I was far more entertained the third time watching this and the slow joke was a plot device that actually got good use that wasn't boring. Sure; there were a few problems here and there; but it was fun. And then the cliff finally came to fruition and it's bad because there was no reason to push the reset button since the amount wasn't going to be enough to buy back the SeaDuck anyway since it was Rebecca's money in the end. So it's okay to do a finish where Baloo beats the odds and wins. It would have been more predictable, but at least we now know why they don't do the unpredictable finish Cushner did here. If it was for a million dollars and Baloo is offered half of the winnings by Rebecca, then you do the reset button finish here.) There is no good reason to push the reset button here since that it's only a hundred thousand dollars and it's unlikely Rebecca would ever let Baloo buy back the SeaDuck anyway. Thankfully; the episode is almost over and I hope I never have to see this plotline again. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: I think Ducktales 2017 did this same plot as well with Louie, although Louie I think beat the odds and won. I'll have to watch that episode with a critical eye on day and compare like I always do in these situations.) Look; I like an episode without bad guys but if you drive a gimmick down to the ground without Kit carrying the freaking episode then it's not worth writing. (I concur. Kit was almost nothing in this episode, actually.) This pretty much ends any hope now of TaleSpin getting renewed unless BOOM comics can somehow get past licensing. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Well, there's always "The Lost Cargo of Kit Cloudkicker" which was 20 minutes of adult Kit being awesome!) The Pazuza clerk rubs it in of course as Baloo goes into a state of denial which is so bad that it's actually quite humorous. Kit tries to help him; but no dice.

Ralph gets to the counter and knocks on it. The Pazuza boar opens to tell him that the deadline has pasted. Ralph cuts one final promo before fainting away as the letter lands on the desk. Then the boar suddenly sees something interesting; but before it can get any good, Kit Cloudkicker grabs the letter and walks away saying that the letter is to be returned to sender. (That proved to be the most stupid thing Kit has done that I didn't like out of him. This was a special kind of episode in this series and I didn't like it.) We then fade to black and we finally return to Higher...For...Hire as the SeaDuck finally lands. Baloo and Kit walks out as they see various stuff that Rebecca bought. (A red roofless car, a limo and a boat.) Baloo is upset that she has to bring the stuff back and Kit states that it's only money. Baloo isn't worried about that; he's worried that she didn't trust him not to screw up. Then Rebecca Cunningham runs out looking like a shopping freakazoid as she give various presents to Kit. Kit got the present he always wanted and I'll leave that as an exercise to the reader. (An Aronka P39, Thunder-Buster is what Kit said.) He got two more gifts which he didn't really explain at all. Rebecca forces Baloo into the office and shows him the soda pop machine that he always wanted not to mention a perfectly decorated office too. (Complete with chandelier, piano and candlesticks.) Baloo then hugs the soda-pop machine and starts to cry. Badly, I might add. Rebecca believes that Baloo thinks of the soda-pop machine as a human being and what is she smoking on that line?! Baloo admits that he failed to deliver the letter. Then Rebecca starts to cry with him. Very badly, I might add. Rebecca then admits that it's her fault because she failed to tell him what was in the letter. Oy vey Rebecca; how dare you?! Then again; it's better her than Molly who would get blamed for everything. Right Molly haters?! It's bad enough that Kit's performance went down the drain; now Rebecca has to stoop to this crap now?!

I should note that Baloo dumps the letter outside the window and into the trash can during this sequence. (You know what; Rebecca's sobbing was bad, but it was understandable in a way since she did decide to not tell Baloo about the letter. Even so; 95% of this is Baloo's fault, the crying was not needed and it made Rebecca look weak. On the other hand; if she was written as an angry difficult person, it would have been worse because Baloo admitted his guilt and was completely remorseful for his actions. So it's not nearly as bad as it sounded. Still the worst episode of the series anyway.) The mailman appears with a letter which prompt Baloo and Rebecca to scare him away. Kit grabs the letter and starts reading it. Finally; a spot that makes him look good for a change. He then finds out that the clerk at Pazuza want to buy the eighteenth class stamp that was on the letter, which is the first one used in forty years...for a hundred thousand dollars! SWEVERE! Everyone cheers in glee; except that the letter is in the trash which Baloo bawls his brains out. DAMN YOU CUSHNER! (This angered me more than Rebecca's response to Baloo admitting his guilt because there was no reason to continue this plot since the episode was nearly over. In essence, the episode stopped which only encourages Quack Pack even more in hindsight.) Rebecca is finally mad as a dog trash collector -- who looks like the same dog from Paul's earlier only different color fur (Question: If you are an anthro and you dye your fur purple, isn't that animal cruelity?) -- throws the trash into the trash truck and speeds off. Kit, Baloo and Rebecca chase the truck to merifully end the episode at 21:04. (Yes folks; this is how the entire series was going to end. NO BUYS~!) Everyone who reads this website; the longest streak of no thumbs down episode in DTVA history ends at sixty; albeit barely. Yes; it took one hammered down joke and a terrible finish/ending to do it too. (Nope; just the terrible finish and ending did it in, plus the overall idiot plot and Kit doing nothing but talk.) Put this on Goof Troop, have Goofy be the idiot to Pete and this would be uber funny. But on a show that isn't an asinine sitcom?! FORGET ABOUT IT~! Butta-Bing! ** ¼ (45%).

THE REVIEW LINE

Okay; where to begin here?! I'll start with the positives: Now to be perfectly fair; I did love Grindstone and Ralph; their antics were pretty funny. The fake blood rib and Baloo's clam excuse were downright hilarious. Molly and Rebecca were okay until the ending and Sunwoo's animation was dead on for the most part. (Yeah; I never complained about the animation once on this episode. Then again; Sunwoo's stiff animation proved to work wonders in an episode with no real cartoon spots.) Baloo's performance was also pretty good too; for the most part. (Ed Gilbert's acting was carrying the episode; which is great for Baloo, but it doesn't help the episode any.) These elements literally saved this episode from being the DUD it deserves to be. Jermey Cushner might just be the worst writer for this series and it showed as I was cringing at the number of contrived spots (six of them) that were mostly out of context. A few logic breaks didn't help it either and a sub par performance from Kit Cloudkicker to boot which in my view is the worst performance ever for this series on television. He only did two spots that were any good and it was mostly due to the fact that Jeremy Cushner didn't end the slow mail joke as it was hammered to the ground. (Actually; the slow joke was fine, it was that awful finish and ending that killed this episode.) Grindstone didn't get enough character development and Ralph became a victim of the annoying joke that it was hard to laugh at them for doing it. This is exactly what I mean when Seth McFarlane tries to do a funny joke and doesn't know when to end it properly. (Family Guy is much more sadistic at this than TaleSpin will ever be.) Cushner continued this joke from the ten minute mark onward and it got depressing in the end because ; in spite of it all, it didn't lead to a payoff of Baloo winning against all odds and Baloo got a ticket from a jaywalking cop at the finish. (Or vandalism.) The whole ending swevere was all right and then it instantly turned to crap as we reset the entire episode again. The reset button didn't need to be pushed twice; or even once because even if Rebecca had won; she wasn't going to let Baloo buy back the SeaDuck anyway since she only won a hundred thousand dollars; which would only improve her business standing a notch; but no more.

This idiot plot would have worked in Goof Troop since Goofy is a funny idiot; but it is cringe worthy to watch it in a show that professes to be the true Disney on free television. I can see why people think this is a downer episode; because there was no excuse for it to exist, period. Even more so now when we see that there were two much better quality scripts that didn't get approved like The Hunt For White November and the one involving Molly seeing Danger Woman for what she really is. They could have saved this for Goof Troop two years later. However; they didn't for goodness knows what reason and it rendered TaleSpin into the Ducktales wannabe status for good. (And I put 2:1 odds that they redo the plotline for the Ducktales Reboot and somehow make it even worse than this episode. Prove me wrong writers, prove me wrong.) Time Bandit might have been a redo of Allowance Day; but it was an awesome redo. (Yes it was, sexism aside.) Bearly Alive would have been great; if Wang Films didn't screw the pooch (and had Ken Koonce and David Weimers not editing their own stories.). And so on and so on. Overall; we had a solid made episode from the animators with decent performances from guys I didn't think had it in them and the slow mail joke could have been funny for a time; however, it died in three minutes because it was a thin joke and needed a really good subplot to make the episode very good. Instead; Jermey Cushner never bothered to write one. (Actually; the slow joke was entertaining throughout. It was mostly because the whole episode was pointless, which is a rare sight in TaleSpin, even in the comics.) We saw only around fifteen seconds tops of Rebecca shopping. I wanted to see at least a couple of minutes of Rebecca shopping because it would really show her greediness towards money. Memo to future TV writers: Just because someone canceled a series for no good reason doesn't mean that you can phone the episode in. I think I have covered all the bases here. (2020 Gregory Weagle Says: Ironically, Last Fan Standing from Kick Buttowski was a paradox of awesomeness and the writers giving zero fucks about it. It also helped that Cousin Kyle and Jackie Whackerman were in there just to screw Kit Buttowski over. Oh, and there's the WW1 shooting spot that aired a week before the Sandy Hook tragedy. Cannot forget about that one.) Next up is Paradise Lost which in my opinion is WildCat's greatest hour. (And the next episodes are either The Time Bandit or Citizen Khan. Four more episodes left to transcribe and review and then it's comic reviews and other updates.) So...

Thumbs barely down for this episode and I'll see you next time.

Back to TaleSpin Rants!
Return to the Rant Shack!
Return to the Unofficial Kit Cloudkicker Homepage!